Chapter 7: Separate

The Arena - Day 11

A cannon blast makes me look up. A flock of snowy white birds take to the air, startled.

I glance over my shoulder at Bale and Amarella. They look back at me, Amarella's expression a little stunned. Her green eyes meet mine. It's the first cannon we've heard in four days. I know what we're all thinking.

"Who do you think it was?" I finally ask.

When I look at Bale I can tell he has the same person in mind. Hopefully it was Porcelain. He shifts uncomfortably, passing his spear from one hand to the other.

"I don't know," Amarella breathes. "Those two boys from Seven and Nine are left. And the girl from One."

"Porcelain," I supply.

Amarella nods, red hair falling around her shoulders. "Yeah. Her."

I turn, continuing to walk. We reach a flat part of the mountain, a little lower down than our camp. The trees are just dense enough to give us cover, but spread out enough to allow us to move around. With Amarella joining us, the food is going to run down more than when it was just me and Bale. I pull out some tough string from my backpack, handing Amarella one of the spools.

"You go that way," I say, pointing to a couple trees that are somewhat together. "I'll set mine up over here."

Bale stands guard as Amarella and I crouch in our places, beginning to set up the tripwires.

We don't really speak as we work. I break off a couple of sticks from the trees, smoothing away some of the snow. I try to remember what the instructor at the knot-tying station told us. Knots aren't as difficult, I pick them up easily, though most of what I know is for nets.

I glance at Amarella as I loop some string around one of the sticks. She's intently focused, hands moving with practiced motions. Last night, Bale kept watch before waking me up. Amarella had tried to insist that she should get a shift, but he wouldn't hear it. I know the reason - he doesn't trust her yet. Yet. There's something about Amarella that's just trustworthy. He'll see it eventually.

And besides, if she was going to kill us, she would have yesterday morning.

Still, Bale frowned this morning when I gave her one of our daggers. But she didn't have a weapon, and if something happens I need her to be able to defend herself so Bale and I don't have to.

Our alliance is an interesting one. It's kind of odd to have someone else around again. I'd been used to just having it be Bale and I. And now there's someone else. It's actually kind of nice to have another girl around - one who I know isn't hoping to kill me.

I finish the tripwire, standing up and admiring my work.

"There's a thicket a little further that way," Amarella says as she finishes her trap as well. She points to the east, further into the forest. "I found it on the fourth day or so. It's not much, but it's something."

"Oh," I say, raising my eyebrows. "Yeah, that sounds good." I look over at Bale. "Wanna go?"

He takes a moment to think, and I can tell he's assessing the situation and Amarella. Then he nods. "Sure."

We walk in relative silence. The snow crunches beneath our feet. A small animal scratches in the tree above us. The branches brush in a canopy, blocking out the cloudy sky. Eventually we come to an area with some boulders, the ground more dirt than snow. Several green-leafed shrubs dotted with red berries are in the center.

"I think they're bearberries," Amarella says, plucking one off the bush. She pops it in her mouth, chewing. "I remember them from the Training Center."

I reach out, touching the oval leaves. They're leathery, clusters of the berries around them. I pick one of the berries, watching the red skin shine. "They're pretty."

"Don't eat it," Bale says quickly as I raise it to my mouth. "What if it's poisonous?"

"I've been eating them this long," Amarella says quickly. I can tell she's aware that Bale doesn't fully trust yet. "They aren't poison."

"Sea-Pearl..." Bale says, watching me.

I toss the berry in my mouth, chewing it. "I'm not dead yet, right?"

Bale makes a face, and I laugh.

"I'll be okay - relax." I smile in a way I hope is reassuring.

Amarella begins to gather more berries, putting them in her satchel.

"Thank you," I tell her.

She smiles back at me. "Of course. What are allies for?"

I smile too. Even Bale's lips quirk up a bit. I glance at him. "How's your leg?"

He shrugs. "It's healing. Walking isn't a problem anymore."

I nod. "We can change the bandages again when we get back." The last thing we need is for it to get infected. "You can go ahead and head back if you want. We'll just finish up with the berries."

"It's okay," he says quickly. "I don't mind waiting."

I give Bale a look. "Go ahead and go back." I take out a couple throwing knives. "We'll be back in a bit." I know he's hesitant to leave me alone with Amarella, worried she'll turn on me. But I know she won't. Besides, I want to talk to her alone. She doesn't open up around Bale as much, and I just want to talk to her alone for a bit. "Please, Bale?"

He looks at me for a moment, blue eyes bright. And then he nods. "Shout if you need anything."

"Will do," I reply, smiling as he turns, beginning the short walk back to our camp. I watch him leave, listening to his footsteps and the sound of Amarella picking bearberries.

I turn around, walking closer to her. "So," I begin, picking a few berries. "How have you been? The last time I saw you was during the Cornucopia."

"Oh," she says, giving me an apologetic expression. "Sorry for running into you, by the way. It was so chaotic, I-"

I wave it away. "No worries, I get it. Um, sorry Maxx tried to kill you..."

She purses her lips as she keeps picking berries. "Maxx... was that his name?"

I nod.

"He... he was from Two, right?"

I nod again. "Yeah, he was."

"What happened to him?" she asks, her voice small.

I clear my throat, not sure how much I should tell her. It isn't exactly a happy thing, and I don't know how squeamish she might be. "He was killed by the boy from One. He turned on him. I wasn't there. Bale was, though. He managed to get away with Porcelain."

"Is that when you guys destroyed the Career's camp?" Amarella asks. She suddenly winces. "I-I mean, um, your camp."

"It's okay," I say, laughing lightly. "We called ourselves Careers a little too."

She glances at me carefully. "You and Bale don't exactly seem like... well, normal Careers."

"We... prefer to do things differently," I answer carefully. "We left Porcelain a few days after the incident with Maxx."

"I realized something," Amarella says, looking back down at the berries. "When I talked to you and Bale yesterday, it was the first time I'd talked to another person since the beginning of the Games."

I'm silent as I consider that. It's hard to imagine someone not speaking to another person for ten days. But it makes sense. Even though my alliance with the other Careers wasn't very good, I still had people to talk to. Amarella didn't. It's a wonder she didn't go half crazy being all by herself.

"Well," I say, handing her the berries I've collected. "You have us now."

She looks back at me, grinning. It's a beautiful smile. She takes the bearberries, closing her satchel. "That should be enough for now."

We turn, beginning to trudge slowly through the snow.

"Do you have any siblings?" I ask her, glancing at the 6 on her jacket sleeve.

"No," she replies, adjusting her bag strap, "I'm an only child. But I do have a cousin a few years younger than me, and he's basically a little brother to me. My ma couldn't really have any other kids besides me. My da had thought they wouldn't be able to have any kids, but then I came along. And my cousin is kind of like his son, so it all turned out okay."

I watch as her step takes on a little skip as she talks about her family. I'm amazed by how happy she sounds. It's as if we aren't even really in the arena, but just wandering around outside in District 6.

"What about you? You have... was it, twelve siblings?" Amarella asks. "I remember you talking about it during your interview."

"Close! It's eleven," I say.

"That must be nice," Amarella sighs. "Sometimes I wish I had more siblings. It can get a little lonely at times."

I'm quiet, unsure of what to say. Before I can, Amarella spots something near the base of a tree, on some rotting wood.

"Oh!" She hurries ahead, stooping down and taking out her dagger. "I know these! They're brick caps! I learned about them in training too."

I walk over, watching as she cuts the clustered mushrooms off by their yellowish stems. The tops are kind of reddish-orange and white, reminding me of orange barnacles. I frown. I'll take the bearberries over the barnacle mushrooms. Amarella stands back up, tucking her dagger back into her satchel. She beams, holding up the mushrooms. "We can cook these later."

I smile back at her. It's no wonder she's survived this long. How did she only get a six in training? The Gamemakers must be stunned now that she's outlived a Career who scored a ten in training.

She bites into one of the mushrooms, looking up as she hums thoughtfully. "Kind of bitter. It'll probably taste better with the berries." She takes another bite, offering me a mushroom.

Barnacles.

"No thanks," I say politely. "I'll wait until dinner."

She nods, cradling the rest of the mushrooms in her arms.

We continue walking, getting back to camp as Bale stokes the fire, smoke flowing to the roof of the cave and out the mouth. I take off my backpack, moving over to his where the bandages are. "Alright, Evestrom, leg please."

Amarella giggles, sitting down by the fire. She takes off her gloves, watching as Bale rolls up his pant leg, exposing the bandages covering the sword wound. I unwrap the bandages. The cut is looking much better than before.

"It's good it was shallow," I say. "Sorry we can't sew up your pants, though."

He shrugs. "Sorry we can't sew up your sleeve."

I glance at my arm, where my white shirt sleeve and jacket sleeve are slit. The cut has healed well. I shrug, returning to Bale's cut. "No worries." I clean the cut with some snow, rewrapping the bandages and tying them with a tight knot.

"Thank you, Nurse Sea-Pearl," he says, rolling his pant leg back down.

I smile at him. For a moment I want to lean forward and kiss him. But then I remember Amarella. So instead, I force myself to get up and put away the bandage roll.

We stand on a ridge overlooking a bit of the valley, the moon looming high over head. It's brighter tonight, providing plenty of silvery light. The stars twinkle, winking at us.

I tuck my chin into my coat, a cold breeze blowing past, kicking up some snow. We decided to walk out after lazing around after dinner. We had a supper of bearberries, brick cap mushrooms, and more beef jerky. Well, Amarella ate the mushrooms anyways. Bale apparently had the same barnacle image I did. The bearberries were delicious, especially after being cooked a bit.

"When is it going to-" I begin before the Panem anthem blasts through the air.

The Panem crest glows in the sky, beginning today's Fallen Tributes.

We wait in tense silence. The crest seems to be up forever. And then a face appears.

It's the boy from District Seven, looking down at us from the sky of the arena.

Disappointment hits me like a brick wall. I deflate a bit. It only dawns on me now just how much I'd been hoping it was Porcelain.

Bale sighs lightly to the point where I barely hear him. He's disappointed too.

I remember something from the second day in the arena. During the Tribute hunt. How Maxx had wanted to kill the boy from Seven. I want to find that brat from Seven. He punched me back at the bloodbath.

I sigh, looking out across the arena.

The snow-covered forests and mountains look beautiful in the moonlight. Clouds gather overhead. It'll probably snow heavily tonight.

"It's really nice out," Bale says, voicing my thoughts.

Amarella and I murmur in agreement.

"I love the moon," Amarella says, looking up at it. And then she leans over and vomits.

I gasp, watching as she falls to her hands and knees, coughing and retching, gasping in desperate breathes.

"What's happening?" Bale yells, his eyes wild.

I rush over to her, feeling the same panic as him. What's happening? What's wrong? "Amarella-" my fingers brush her shoulder before she suddenly collapses to the side, writhing in convulsions.

"Bale!" I scream, turning to him.

He stands there, stunned, looking just as helpless as I feel.

I whip back to Amarella as she shakes. And then she goes still, the convulsions stopping. I hold my breath, hovering over her. Her face is to the side, her fiery hair covering parts of it.

"Amarella?" I whisper, reaching down to touch her shoulder. She doesn't respond, lying there, splayed in the snow. "Amarella?" I lightly shake her shoulder.

A cannon fires.

I don't cry. I don't scream. I just stare at her face, expecting her to turn and look at me. But she doesn't.

She won't ever see her family again. Her parents, her cousin, could be screaming right now, hitting their television, and yelling for her to wake up. Begging their daughter to not be dead. She won't walk again. She won't breathe again. She's dead. Amarella's dead.

"She ate those mushrooms..." Bale says from behind me, his voice just loud enough for me to hear.

I stand up slowly, not taking my eyes from her.

The memories of this afternoon flash in my mind. Amarella grinning and holding up the mushrooms.

The Hunger Games are no place for smiles. Picking berries and mushrooms with your allies leads to death. I hate it here.

"We need to separate," I say, still staring at Amarella.

"What?" Bale asks. I can feel him looking at me, and I finally turn to face him.

"We need to separate," I repeat. My voice is hollow. I don't even feel anything as I say it, staring at him.

"What?" he asks again quietly.

"We can't be allies anymore."

His eyes remain on mine, and I notice everything about him I like. His hair blowing softly in the cold wind. His long eyelashes. His lips parting to reply.

"Sea-Pearl, I-"

"Don't," I say quietly. Feeling comes back, and I try to stomp it down. Because I know it's going to hurt to leave him.

Without looking into his eyes again, I move quickly, walking back to camp and leaving Amarella behind. In the cave, the fire is still smoking. I pick up my backpack. Bale has the bandages, he'll be fine. I pick up Luna's bow and quiver, pulling the bow around my torso and slinging the quiver onto my back. When I turn back to the entrance of the cave, Bale is standing there, watching me. I pause.

"You'll be okay?" I ask him finally.

"You're really leaving?" he replies.

"What does it look like?" I say.

I can tell by his expression that my words hurt. Some part of me hurts too. A voice urges me to apologize. To stay with the only friend left in this arena. But the Hunger Games is no place for friends. It's no place to have feelings for someone. I hate it here. I hate it, I hate it, I hate.

I walk toward Bale, stopping in front of him.

"Are you going to stop me?" I ask him.

He watches me a for a moment. When I take a step around him, he doesn't stop me. I force myself not to look back.

Maybe sometime, Panem will be a good place. There was a time when these Games didn't exist. But that doesn't change the fact that all these people have already died, and we're here. I'm here. Right now.

I hate it more than anything.

Thanks for reading!

6/2/18: The mushrooms that Amarella ate are actually known as sulphur tufts, mushrooms that look like brick caps - which are not poisonous. Don't eat strange mushrooms, kids.