A/N - Hi! A quick thanks to my beta for giving this read through a couple of months ago. I appreciate the time it takes :)
So, we are here for the verdict and I'm not going to waffle too much, so here goes!
.oOo. Chapter Fifteen .oOo.
Beca's pitiful sleep did nothing to quell her queasy stomach and she was up before dawn broke, her headphones perched firmly on her head as she lost herself in some work that Colbie Caillat had put her way. She was grateful for the exposure but for the last two weeks had been more grateful for the distraction. It wasn't really the music she wanted to make but knew experience in all and every genre would be beneficial when she had the means to branch out on her own.
Luke had been one of her biggest supporters and she was eternally indebted to him for the kick start. As promised, he'd taken her along to the local gigs and music festivals and she'd gotten plenty of names of unsigned artists looking for freelance work. Luke had recognised that she was distracted in the last few weeks, as the court date had approached. He'd tried to be a friend, the sensible shoulder and the sensitive ear compared to Amy's theatrics. She considered Luke one of her best allies.
Her day and a half in court had constantly been replaying in her mind. She questioned herself continuously about the answers she'd given and if she'd been prepared for Oliver's barrage. John, her own attorney, hadn't gone at Chloe the same way and she felt so let down by him.
She knew she didn't have much to show on paper, but she'd been so disappointed of her portrayal as a bad mother when Jessie was grounded, sociable, clever and friendly. She was everything Beca wanted for her and she worked hard for her, so she didn't have to grow up with the same lack of opportunities as her.
Beca couldn't wrap her head around what was going on. She had been under the impression when the letters from the court had started arriving that the court date had been set to determine the Mitchem's visitation rights to Jessie and for her to have access to Alex. She was struggling with how much she'd let Jesse down; he hadn't even known about his child and here she was, being raised by someone else entirely.
She'd been so overwhelmed by that feeling that she knew she'd not asked as many questions as she should have done about her biological child. In the first couple of minutes of meeting her in the play centre, that cold March day, she'd found herself drawn to her, wanting to reach out and hold her. She easily recalled Alex shrinking away from her, which she did understand. That was her all around, not wanting a stranger to get too close.
She was sitting at the bar stool, nursing a large mug of black coffee when the soft footfalls across the apartment disturbed her troubled mind.
"Mommy?" Jessie said, rubbing at her eyes with one hand as she tightly gripped her bunny around its neck with the other.
"Hey baby." Beca posted a smile on her face and leant down to pick Jessie up, swinging her up onto her hip as she kissed her cheek. "You sleep good?"
Jessie nodded into her shoulder as she wiggled around a little, finding a comfortable spot.
They shared a single bed in the large closet that was their substitute for a bedroom. Beca didn't have much rental choice when she'd taken on the apartment, determined to bring Jessie up in a warm, safe and brick built environment, rather than the leaky and draughty trailer. She compromised space for safety.
The closet was large and housed a dresser and bed. Beca often woke in the morning if she'd not fallen asleep on the sofa to several stuffed animals covering her. She didn't mind, liked having Jessie close by. It was the same when she was living in the van. They helped keep each other warm.
"I sleeped good." Jessie said as she swiped some of her hair from her face.
"Want some breakfast?" Beca asked as Jessie pulled on the thin necklace around Beca's neck and nodded.
Beca had worn the necklace since the day Jessie died. He always had a lot of junk in his pockets, candy wrappers, a funny shaped stone and a couple of receipts. Amongst his belongings that were given back to them from the hospital, Beca had found a pop tab from a can of drink Jesse had had at some point that last day. She had no idea why he'd had it in his jeans, but she'd kept it regardless. She wore it on a long chain that had been his around her neck, and kept it close to her heart.
"Can we has panny cakes Mommy?"
"I'm not sure we have any pancake mix baby?" Beca said, knowing full well that she didn't. "How about Cheerios?"
Jessie thought about it for a moment, wanting pancakes but understanding they only had those on special days. She nodded to the Cheerios and Beca set her back down on the floor and got up from the bar stool to fetch a bowl.
"Banana on top?" Beca asked as she tipped the Cheerios out for Jessie.
"Yes."
"Yes what?" Beca said, pulling on the fridge door to get the milk out.
"Yes pease Mommy."
"That's better." Beca said as she pushed the pink Minnie Mouse bowl that Chloe had sent to them towards Jessie. She tipped some milk onto the cereal and Jessie reached for her spoon and begun to dig in.
"Auntie Amy is coming to look after you today."
"Why?" Jessie asked, watching as Beca began to slice banana over her Cheerios. "You has to work?"
"No, Mommy has to go to court again to see Chloe so we can work out where you are going to be sleeping."
"I sleep here."
"Hopefully you will but it might not be every night."
"No, I stay here."
"You are a little too young to understand Ladybug. I know and I'm sorry it makes no sense to you." Beca said, watching Jessie try to process what Beca was saying. "But hey, we'll work it out that you get to play with your sister and Alex. That'll be fun, won't it?"
"No."
"Oh, it will be. You need some friends."
"No."
"You don't need friends?" Beca said, reaching for her mug.
"No. I gots you."
Beca leant down and kissed the top of Jessie's head, smoothing down the bed hair. She didn't know what to say to that. She didn't know what to say to a lot these days. The past two weeks had been a nightmare and she'd barely heard from her attorney other than to confirm the court date.
The familiar ache in her brain returned as she wondered what the day would bring. She'd give anything to turn back the clock a few months but at the same time, she also wanted to get to know Alex better.
Alex.
Her own child.
Beca knew she loved Alex. It was strange and powerful to feel the rush of feelings Beca got when she met Alex for the first time. It was strange to see Jesse's eyes on someone else and see how the little girls' hands were so similar to her own. Beca recognised so much in the little girl who was, in a way, a complete stranger.
Beca had no idea which way the Judge's decision would go. She'd spent the last few nights, in front of her laptop trying to work, with a large Fireball and Coke in one hand switching between wondering if the judge would grant her permanent custody of Alex and she'd have to give Jessie back to Chloe or things would stay as they were but she'd be allowed to see Alex on a regular basis.
She wanted to get to know Alex better, even build a proper relationship with her but not at the cost of losing Jessie. She hoped it would get resolved soon as her nerves were frayed and she was finding it hard to concentrate.
She rubbed at her temples, feeling the ache begin to build. She'd have to start getting ready to leave in an hour but wondered if she'd have enough time for her and Jessie to run to the park for a quick go on the swings.
She knew she didn't. She just wanted one thing to feel normal.
She checked the time on her phone and watched as Jessie finished the last of her breakfast.
"Finished?" Beca asked with a smile and Jessie nodded, her milk moustache evidence of that. "Shall we go and get dressed?"
Jessie nodded again and slipped down off of the stool, collecting Bunny from the kitchen counter. She picked up her bowl and, with a noisy clatter, dumped it into the sink.
"What do you want to wear today?" Beca asked, peering out of the window to check the weather. Unsurprisingly, it was dry and warm. "Shorts or dress?"
"Dress." Jessie said and Beca rolled her eyes. Jessie always chose a dress and she didn't know why she bothered asking. Beca pulled a purple spotted dress and underwear from the dresser and tossed it onto the bed for her. "We're going to have a race this morning. See who can get ready first. That okay?"
Jessie grinned and gave Beca a thumbs up in response. Beca smiled back, pulled the towel from the back of the door and headed to the bathroom to quickly shower. She undressed and stood under the lukewarm water that did nothing to calm the thoughts racing through her mind. Everything ached as she washed her hair.
Beca began to cry, letting the tears mix with the shampoo run off. She didn't want Jessie to see her upset and took an extra minute to dry her hair in an effort to calm down.
Amy's persistent ringing on the intercom also did nothing to calm Beca's worries.
Buzzing Amy in, Beca quickly gathered up her clothes and headed back to the bathroom to get dressed. She heard the front door shut with gusto as Amy announced her arrival. She heard Jessie squeal in delight.
"Wassup Jennifer!"
"Auntie Amy, dats not my name!"
"Yes, it is!"
"No, it's Jessie!"
"Jessie?" Amy asked. "Are yoos sure?"
"Yes!" Jessie laughed.
"I thought it was Georgina."
"No!"
"Gertrude?"
"No! Jessie!"
"Jasmine?"
"Auntie Amy!" Jessie whined playfully.
"Are yoos sure Amy is my name?"
"Yes! Mommy calls you Amy!"
"What's Mommy's real name?"
"This Mommy is called Beca. The other Mommy is called Chloe." Jessie said and Beca froze in the bathroom. She had explained it to Jessie before but didn't think she'd understood. She quickly finished getting dressed and stepped out to find Amy and Jessie roughhousing it on the sofa.
"Morning Becs!" Amy called out as she tickled Jessie who suddenly let out a very large hiccup.
"She's just had breakfast Amy." Beca warned as she looked around for her shoes.
"Aww, I was gonna take her out for beers for breakfast!" Amy laughed, swooping down on Jessie once more. Jessie was trying to get Amy to stop but couldn't get the words out through her giggles.
"Can you brush her hair while I finish getting ready?"
"Sure." Amy said, letting go of Jessie. "Yoos wanna grab me yoos brush Jolene?"
"Auntie Amy!" Jessie called out as she pulled away from Amy. "It's Jessie!"
"Okay, Joanne."
"Mommy!" Jessie yelled as she headed to the closet to fetch her brush.
"Amy, please… I've got a killer headache." Beca said, bending down to slip her shoes on.
"Yeah, sorry." Amy said, looking up at her properly for the first time. "Yoos okay?"
"No, I'm really not. Last few days have been…" Beca said, unable to finish what she wanted to say.
"Why'd yoos have ta wait two weeks for Judgey to make his decision?" Amy asked as she bent down to retrieve one of Jessie's toys from underneath her foot.
Beca rubbed her temples. She needed quiet so badly and desperately wanted Amy to leave. The noise level in the apartment was unbearable.
"Becaroo?" Amy asked when Beca didn't respond.
"Takes time to process documents through the court. Judge has to retire to consider his verdict. There was a lot of information."
"But yoos were only in court a couple of days."
"That doesn't matter. They pretty much made me out to be a monster. Bad home, crappy low paying job, no money, criminal record, no prospects whilst painting the Princess in gold and glitter. I didn't exactly aspire myself to the judge very well. And the second day, when David was on the stand again, he pretty much sucked all the life and soul out of the room, mocking my lifestyle and making more out of my upbringing."
"Did they put her back on the stand?" Amy asked as Jessie handed her a brush and Amy got to work on the red curls that bounced every time Jessie moved.
"No, just a couple of her friends. One of them was a school friend who had a face like a slapped ass. She backed up everything Chloe said, stressed what a down to earth person she was and how good she was with the kids, how much time she spent with them. A real mother of the year."
"Yoos a great Mom too Beca."
"Yeah, not so much."
"No, really. None of this was yoos fault."
"I know that but it wasn't Chloe's fault either. This whole situation is beyond fuc-" Beca glanced towards Jessie. "-fudged up."
"What I don't understand is she was told she was havin' twinnies, right?" Amy asked.
"That's correct."
"So how come she never questioned two babies that didn't look alike?"
"Honestly, I don't really know. Maybe a doctor explained a mistake or got technical over conception or something. Or maybe they literally just didn't notice. I mean Kate is a red head, exactly like Jessie. Alex has brown hair like Jesse and me. Alexandra was smaller too but doctors would have used all the excuses under the sun to explain why they looked different after an emergency delivery and a stay in NICU and by the time they got the twins home, they'd have already bonded. I wish I knew, it doesn't make sense to me but then again…"
"… what, Beca?"
"How often did I say to you that Jessie was nothing like me or her dad?"
"Yeah, maybe a few times."
"And how didn't I notice that she wasn't mine? We can blame Chloe and David all we like for not noticing the two girls they took home were different but I never once stopped to really question why my kid had red hair and blue eyes when everyone in my family has brown hair and brown eyes."
"I'm not sure yoos could have known."
"Maybe deep down we knew something but ignored it because this situation was so farfetched, it would never have crossed our minds."
"Jessie is still your kid though." Amy said. "Don't worry about what that stupid attorney said to you."
"Thanks Ames." Beca said, rubbing her temples again.
"Yoos okay?"
"I've just got a headache." Beca explained again.
"What time do yoos have to leave?"
"In about ten minutes. Need to leave spare time in case the car doesn't start."
"Yoos can take mine, if you want?"
"You sure?"
"Yeah, course." Amy said, patting her pockets for her keys. "Me and Half Pint are hanging out here anyway."
"Thanks. Would save an additional stress I don't need today."
.oOo.
"Oyez, oyez, oyez… Department One of the Superior Court of the State of California, the Honourable Judge William F Highberger presiding, is now in session. All rise."
Chloe stood up and gripped David's hand as she looked over to Beca's side. As usual, Beca wouldn't meet her eye, choosing to stare steadfastly ahead. Chloe desperately wanted to reach out to her, to see how she was, if she'd been sleeping as badly as she had been the last two weeks. Chloe wanted to hear how her work was going, genuinely interested in her life.
It was hard for her to keep her distance when all she wanted to do was make it right.
She hadn't intended for this to go as far as it did. She hoped the judge's decision would work out the best for all of them. She didn't harbour any ill feelings towards Beca and instead wanted a friendship to be born where they could raise the girls together. She knew it wouldn't be easy, but she was definitely willing to work with whatever the judge deemed as the best scenario. She couldn't live without Jessica any longer. She needed to have her in her life. She knew the little girl would fit into the wonderful world she'd created for the girls in her home and her life.
It felt strange to Chloe, leaving the fate of her little family in the decision of someone she didn't know. She knew the Judge had taken plenty of time to assess the slightly unusual situation and had spoken with the psychologists that had visited their house on a number of occasions.
Looking over at Beca again, Chloe hoped she'd had the same support that she'd felt from her friends and family. She had a sneaking suspicion that she hadn't though.
"Good morning ladies and gentlemen." Judge Highberger spoke out into the courtroom. He laid his folder of papers down on the bench in front of him before looking up. "Everything that goes on in Family Court is confidential. We will take an oath of confidentiality. If everyone will please raise their right hand and repeat after me:"
He waited while the few hands were raised.
"I solemnly swear that I will not divulge, either by words or signs, any information which comes to my knowledge, in the course of this Family Court session, and that I will keep secret all said proceedings, which may be held in my presence. Thank you. Please be seated."
He waited a minute while the court participants took their seats and the usual noise with a group sitting and sorting out papers had subsided.
"We are here today to discuss the parental rights, visitation and custody of Jessica Amy Mitchell, aged three years, eleven months and two weeks and Alexandra Helen Elizabeth Louise Mitchem also aged three years, eleven months and two weeks. What say you on this matter?" Judge Highberger spoke evenly.
"Agreed, Your Honour." Oliver and John spoke together.
"We are also speaking today regarding a compensation matter with Flintstone Hospital and the Children's Hospital of Atlanta. The latter hospital trust will be meeting with the two parties in two weeks, but I have awarded each party one hundred thousand dollars from Flintstone Hospital. Miss Mitchell, yours will be used to pay off your medical debt with the hospital and the difference, if any, will be transferred to you once completed. Mrs Mitchem, yours will be award to an account of your choosing once the matter is settled."
"Thank you, sir." Beca said, looking up long enough to catch the Judge's eye.
"It is the court's decision for Katharine Rose Elizabeth Francine Mitchem to remain in the custody of her biological parents, Chloe Anne Elizabeth Mitchem, nee Beale and David Robert Mitchem of Studio City, Los Angeles, California. Katharine Mitchem will not be sought for visitation rights by Miss Rebeca Mitchell of Los Angeles, California." Judge Highberger spoke softly.
Beca flinched. She had a sudden rush of dread flood her body. She side-eyed Chloe who was clutching at the bottom of her coat as it were a life jacket and she were in the middle of the ocean.
"It is the court's decision for Alexandra Helen Elizabeth Louise Mitchem, the biological daughter of Miss Rebeca Mitchell to remain in her guardian's custody. Mr and Mrs Mitchem will be advised to raise a formal petition to legally adopt the child, as and when they choose. It is this court's decision not to place her in an unfit family and home, where her current needs cannot be met to the same standard. The reports read that the child is settled and happy in her current home."
Beca could feel the tears pooling in her eyes as the judge delivered the kick straight into her gut.
"Miss Mitchell will have visitation rights to Alexandra, and this will be granted at one hour every two weeks at a time to suit Mr and Mrs Mitchem. Miss Mitchell will have an additional hour on her day of birth and at Christmas time, Easter time and during the school holidays when that occurs and at a time to suit Mr and Mrs Mitchem's schedule."
"Your Honour?" John spoke out, raising his hand.
"Yes Counsellor?"
"One hour every two weeks? That hardly seems fair on Miss Mitchell."
"You will have a chance to appeal after the full verdict has been given." Judge Highberger said, glaring over the top of his glasses. "Alexandra is happy and settled in her home with a family who love her. Miss Mitchell has expressed no desire to take Alexandra on full time."
"That's not true!" Beca squealed. "I'd take her in a heartbeat, but I understand the bond she has with Katharine, Chloe and David. I never said I didn't want her, I meant that I wouldn't want her life upset and unsettled."
"And will she live in a closet with you, Miss Mitchell? Your home life does not indicate a suitable level of living for a child. The Mitchems are suited for a third child."
"With my medical debt paid off, I'll get a bigger apartment. It's-"
"-This matter is not up for discussion." Judge Highberger said simply and precisely. "Counsellor, please keep your client under control."
Chloe blinked as the news settled in her brain. She didn't have to give up Alex, the tiny baby she'd loved for nearly four years. She was elated at the decision, pleased with the Judge's decision and happy that, in time, she could show Beca that Alex was happy where she was. She could hear Beca talking with the judge and looked over to her, baulking a little as she saw her face crumble and tears begin to run down her cheeks. Chloe's heart fluttered and then began to thump in her chest. This felt wrong.
David squeezed Chloe's hand.
"Pay attention Chloe." He muttered, leaning forward to sit in her view line of Beca.
Chloe shook herself just as she heard the judge ask John to keep Beca under control. She looked past David and saw Beca gripping onto the table in front of her.
"It is the court's decision that Jessica…"
The blood rushed into Chloe's ears as she waited for the words to be spoken. She hoped and prayed with everything she had she'd be granted more time with her little girl. She needed her close by. She wanted to treat her in all the ways she'd been able to treat Kate and Alex. She'd think of it more as having three daughters, than two. She loved them all equally.
"… Amy Mitchell will…" Judge Highberger continued.
Beca found herself crossing her fingers under the table as her heart thumped mercilessly in her chest. The judge was speaking painfully slowly or else the world had slowed down around her. She was devastated at losing better access to Alex but hoped as the judge had sided with Chloe and David's position on keeping Alex, that she would be granted full custody of Jessie. She recalled the first attempts at sorting out the switch, and how she'd been asked on day one if she wanted to swap the girls back. She couldn't undo the past four years with a simple yes or no and still felt to this day that she'd possibly not have a different answer if asked again.
Beca shook herself and forced herself to focus on the judge.
"… return to her biological parents, Chloe and David Mitchem." Judge Highberger paused as David leapt from his seat, fist bumped the air and gripped Oliver's shoulder in happiness.
Beca blinked once.
"Miss Mitchell will be granted one hour every two weeks visitation rights, have an additional hour on her day of birth and at Christmas time, Easter time and during the school holidays when that occurs and at a time to suit Mr and Mrs Mitchem's schedule." Judge Highberger repeated.
Beca blinked twice.
"Mr and Mrs Mitchem will be granted permission by the court to change the child's name to one of their own choosing if they so desire."
Beca blinked a third time.
"Miss Mitchell, you will be required to bring Jessica Amy to the Mitchem's home in Studio City one week from today. You will be accompanied by a member of the court staff. If you do not comply with this order, you will find yourself charged by the court and I will impose the maximum jail time for noncompliance."
Beca blinked for a fourth time. She was surely hearing things wrong.
"Miss Mitchell is also requested to provide a monthly stipend to cover costs of her biological child's upbringing to the Mitchem's. I have arrived at a figure of five hundred dollars per calendar month. The Mitchem's are welcome to challenge this figure should they see fit."
Beca blinked for a fifth time.
'I've lost everything.' The voice in her head screamed as she found herself struggling for breath.
"Miss Mitchell, if your home and work life improves, you can apply for additional visitation rights through the courts if Mr and Mrs Mitchem agree to this. There are forms for you to sign, before you leave today."
"I'm not signing anything." Beca said, her voice shaky and thin.
"Please speak up." Judge Highberger spoke.
"Your Honour, my client-"John said.
"-should have been prepared for all outcomes, Counsellor."
"How did I lose my child when I did nothing wrong?" Beca cried out, her legs giving way as she sank to the floor. "I've got nothing."
Chloe was in mid hug with David, as Beca spoke and she was looking over his shoulder as she watched Beca's heart shattering into a thousand pieces.
.oOo.
A/N – I know, I know… I received death threats* over doing this, but I swear to each and every one of you that there is a reason for doing this. There's a 'come to Jesus' revelation for one person in the next chapter so please don't give up on me or this story now. You've come this far… just a couple more chapters and the tone will change, I promise!
*Not actual death threats unless you count "I'll come and find you and beat you until you make this story happier" as such!