Song 1 - Slow Burn - Kacey Musgrave
Salvation was a treasure on a frozen lake. Take a step, wait for the ice to give, brave another. Korra was worth the risk, Asami only wished she could make the march herself instead of witnessing it all from the shore. She could only hold her hand as she spoke, hoping it would be enough to yank her to safety if she ever fell through.
"My choices aren't being in love or having a family." Korra admitted in a breath, squeezing Asami's fingers between her own, "I need you both…I'm not telling you this to excuse myself from this place, I'm telling you this because I need to be honest with it. I need to feel like I'm home again."
She wasn't sure if what Korra was saying incensed or calmed her father, but Tonraq took his notes none the less. Plates cleared away, legal pad under hand, the dinner table had become a boardroom. His wheels were turning, this Asami understood. Storm abated they had a day or so before the sun melted snow to manageable levels; the perfect deadline for the anxious professional. She couldn't see what he was writing but she could hazard a guess. Word cloud.
"By now," Tonraq scratched his brow, "people here know what Iroh was capable of," his eyes sought Asami now, and she felt Korra's thumb smooth her own. "It won't answer the question of why you married him but why you'd have a good reason to leave,"
"I didn't know he was capable of this," Asami corrected, "All I knew was piece by piece my life was being revealed for the sham it really was, that Iroh didn't love me, and I didn't love him, not in the way I love Korra," despite the declaration she found her shame weighing her down, gazing at their entangled fingers, speaking only to Korra now. "I should have kissed you a long time ago."
Korra's gaze softened, and before they knew it in their foreheads gravitated together.
Tonraq cleared his throat and turned back his page, pointedly looking away as they retreated, faces burning.
"If anything that'll help your case," he huffed, filling the awkward silence.
"What case? We're just addressing the town," Korra barely managed to reel in her defences.
"He's right, this is PR now," Asami assured, "Right or wrong, this is how we make the change."
"We?"
"I mean you and your dad sure, but I…" Asami trailed off, scooping her hair behind her ear, eyes bouncing betwixt the two, "I'm here to help, to stand with you…if you'll have me,"
"I can't-" she began in a breath that started to skip, and suddenly Korra was gasping for a single breath of air. Holding it in her chest, and it was then Asami felt her underhand, her body went as still and silent as stone. Ordinarily no one noticed, but Asami was looking right at her. "I need a minute,"
Korra rose sharply, releasing Asami's hand after a hard squeeze. Asami counted the seconds in her head, watching the door she'd all but jettisoned from.
"She'll need thick skin for this, you both will,"
"This is Korra we're talking about," Asami didn't even look at him to rebuff. "Name someone stronger."
Tonraq hummed in response, but Asami ignored him.
"Sixty," counting the last second of Korra's minute aloud, rising sharply to follow Korra out the door.
She found her just outside the threshold, back pressed against the wall out of sight. Shaking hands reached for her, and Asami laced hers with them instinctively. She watched Korra's stony demeanour fizzle away and from inside the casing she was frantic, and excited. The very sight had Asami's heart pounding.
"Why'd you leave?" she asked, stroking the streaks under her eyes, thumbing them away. Ears hot, head spinning, fearing she'd somehow gone too far.
"I knew you'd follow," Korra laughed. Confused as she was Asami was enthralled by Korra's gravitational pull; it had her stepping into her space and bracing her against the wall. "The idea of what we're doing - you included - I just I- I-"
"Needed a minute," Asami finished for her and tugged her into her arms, feeling her bury her face greedily into her throat.
"What were you going to say? 'I can't' what?" she crooned pressing her lips to her temple sweetly.
"Let you do that for me, put you in danger again, but I-"
"I want to be here for you," Asami admonished.
"I know," Korra whispered, "I was overwhelmed I just- I…I've been hopeless for so long," she closed her eyes, leaning back to show her incredulous face. "But then I felt it," the shyest smile passed over her lips, "I felt how much you love me,"
"What-"
"I mean - intellectually I knew but - watching you stand up to my parents, I never expected- I never dreamed you could ever be this perfect for me. I never let myself think and then suddenly it was this wave…I didn't think it was possible but I just fell more in love with you,"
She gripped Asami's forearms and smiled finally, earnestly. Eye brows pinched as the last vestiges of sorrow left her body.
"I know the feeling," Asami whispered, cradling her cheek.
"Before we do this…" Korra trailed off, smile fading, grip still tight, "I have to know if you're unhappy."
"What?"
"I don't mean now, I mean, when things get hard-I've had this bug in my brain ever since you told me about your mom taking you away and just…if in five minutes or in five, ten, twenty years, when we're old and grey - if you're not okay just tell me please, because what we're about to do…" Korra palm pressed on the small of her back, secure and gentle, "You went through your former life so unhappy and you never said anything, not even to me. I couldn't stand it if that were true again,"
Asami watched her impassively, twined fingers flexing. Hope was imbued in every word Korra had just gifted her. Not in the depressing notion that Asami could ever be unhappy with her, but in the certainty that they'd still be together and in love longer than they'd known each other at this very moment.
"You think we'll have grey hair when we're forty five?" she teased, swaying her.
"God, I hope not,"
"You don't think we'll be silver vixens, side by side on a porch somewhere?"
"Maybe,"
"You're not looking forward to it?"
"Asami-"
"I'll tell you everything," she vowed, "I promise if you promise," pressing her lips to Korra's forehead as she nodded. "Shall we get back in there?"
"Another minute," Korra squeezed her.
In the abstract, when they were planning this, Korra was sure she'd be more afraid than she turned out to be. In one moment she attributed it to having Asami right beside her, but in the next, she had the odd feeling that she was simply ready for this. That the path set out in front of her was an obvious one, so she needn't struggle or fret.
"The jet is on the runway," Asami informed her, pressing her collar smooth for the tenth time since they'd entered the Town Hall inner sanctum, "and we can be in it the air less than thirty minutes,"
Korra's hand caught her ministrations and steadied her, lips turning up in that sly smile.
"You're being very blasé about a potential pitchfork and torch situation, Korra,"
"We can only do what we can do," Korra reminded her, "Let the chips fall,"
"Oh my goodness, are you on drugs again?" Asami accused, free hand tilting her chin up to inspect her pupils. Korra laughed her off.
"No it's," she shrugged, "we put a lot of work in," she bit her lip, "and my worst fears have kind have all come true," she scrunched up her nose in distaste but her tone was light, "it's actually quite a load off,"
Asami blinked owlishly at her, studying her features for errant signs of insanity, but her girlfriend seemed calm, and it had her own panic deflating just enough.
"Still though - if I tell you to run, we're flying out of here,"
"Sure but, if we don't have to, it'd be nice to go back on the ferry," Korra's gaze slid away sheepishly, while her palms braced the curve of Asami's waist, "maybe another time, going alone is no picnic, but it's so much more fun with someone to enjoy it with,"
"Are you asking me out?" Asami accused with narrowing eyes, and for that second Korra squirmed and blushed in front of her, she had her answer.
"Ladies," Tonraq emerged from a flurry of signed papers and briefed staff, adjusting his cufflinks and regalia just so as he approached the hall doors. "How are we feeling?"
"Fine," Korra smiled at him.
Korra could never have answered if not for the days that preceded the question. Since their strategising, eventually all that was left to do was live a life trapped in a snowed in house with her family, and her girlfriend in tow. Katara also, who seemed to appreciate the creche of warmth she'd happened to fall into even if it wasn't her own.
They'd eaten together again, and whiled the evening hours away with several rounds of cards. An activity Korra usually was too impatient to enjoy, and would tank her position just to get out of flitting through droll paper rectangles her elders had always insisted on being fun. In this single spectacular instance, she found herself invested, if only to watch her girlfriend and mother in a tête-à-tête of strategy and luck. She even noted that her father, as impatient as she, stuck around to witness whomever could keep Senna on her proverbial toes.
The Mayor was positively gleeful when his wife was down to a single card and Asami had a handful of twenty or so in her hand, but Korra knew better than to bet against the Engineer with a twinkle in her eye. Given her turn she ran in patterns, placing them in alternating suits until she'd cleared her hand. When she was done she folded her hands in her lap and sat back in her seat to survey the damage.
Korra had never seen her parents expressions so still for so long. She had no idea her father's eyebrows could go that high. Asami tucked her hair behind her ears, bouncing her eyes between the four of them.
"Another round?"
It was the first time in all of Korra's life that she had been home, and truly honest. The opportunity was a unique one. Another first; she fell asleep in her childhood bed as an adult and didn't wake up in an anxious languor. She was sure it was merely minutes prior that her head had hit pillow and Asami had curled into her, ear pressed diligently against her chest. No-one was more surprised than her to hear birdsong floating in from outside.
That morning, it was agreed the only way to avoid being saddled with washing up duty, was to make the breakfast themselves. Something that the heiress was becoming uncharacteristically at ease with. She'd even memorised the timings so that she could grab Korra in each lull, and the pair could huddle leaning against a counter for exquisite minutes at a time.
"To keep warm," she'd insisted, cuddling closer to Korra in their corner, running her cheek over her sweater as those strong arms tightened and propped her up. Both were fully aware they were being observed at this point, and initially had agreed wordlessly that no more affection than hand holding should take place in the presence of Korra's family. Though no dissent ever came in response to overt affections, and over time, the fear of it dissipated. As they were being watched, Korra was watching back, and sure enough the unexpected was becoming the new normal. She found herself at ease whenever Asami kissed her palm suddenly or snuggled next to her in the same room as her elders.
In a room with a microcosm of her hometown however, was a different story.
The hall doors were oak, and heavy, and Korra nudged them for a moment to see the crowd outside. Her eyes sought familiarity first, and immediately spotted her cousins at the back of the room, their father Unalaq tall and sallow beside them, smirking irritably. In another life she'd slap that smirk off his face, but she was in enough trouble as it was.
She noticed next the rash of vibrant colours dotted from a collection of peoples gathered on left side of the room. Her jaw dropped and already pounding heart kicked into overdrive. They were Water Tribe, and they were allies, like her.
"Dad-"
"I gave Kya a call, she gave me some numbers, a sailing club, a local bar-"
"There's a gay bar in town?"
"I don't think I'd have been I'd have been a very responsible parent to bring a nine year old to any bar Korra,"
"You knew?"
"No matter where you go Korra, there's always going to be people like you, no matter who you are," Korra balked at the thought of it. Right under her nose. "They're waiting for you,"
He opened the door for his daughter, her girlfriend, his wife. Mayoral staff filed out after him, and as he approached the podium at the head of the room, the cacophony of voices softened to silence. Korra caught sight of Katara in the front row with other elders, and waved back at her as she took her seat.
"Good Afternoon, members of the press and citizens of Harbour town," camera's flashed and Tonraq paused until they ceased. "As many of you know already - my daughter is in love, and it is love." He met her gaze at the edge of the room, and Korra did her best not to squirm as heads turned. All she could do was cling tighter to Asami's fingers.
"She and Miss Sato have been smitten with one another for the better part of two decades. They've also faced monumental barriers that preclude a relationship like theirs. Barriers such as a marriage of duty, honour and familial pressures to abide by what society has dictated. Barriers which many of us will have no idea what it is like to face - to overcome and some of us, here today, know all too well."
"It's easy to get defensive - when you live in a place that has spent so long defending our pride, our land, our history and how we've adapted to a harsh unyielding world. Change is essential to our way of life. So what do we do when faced with something we can't understand from experience? Personally, I had a choice, to bury my head in the snow, or, to educate myself in order to be a better father and I hope - a better Mayor. This was actually brought to my attention by my Korra, stand up honey. If there is one thing I do know about my position, it is that listening to my constituents is also essential, so without further ado - Korra,"
A pin dropping would have disturbed the crowd beyond measure as Korra climbed the pedestal after her father. She threw a cursory gaze back to Asami, whom she expected to find alone, but sometime after she'd reluctantly dropped her hand, Senna had picked it up. Her heart skipped to see it, and the warmth rippled from her core to her fingertips to see Asami's watery encouraging smirk.
She turned to face the small crowd. Braving her own brief smile, before leaning into the mic.
"Hey," she immediately received shrill feedback and she backed off. "Sorry, new at this," a few people chuckled, and it calmed her. "I want to say thank you for being here. I have to say looking out on so many people with rainbows in the crowd - I had no idea there were so many of you. This is not the place I thought I grew up in, it's not the place I left. I never expected to be surprised so thank you for that."
Looking out at them now there could only have been twenty of them, and in a town of thousands it was a tiny percentage. Still she couldn't help but get choked up at the sight of them.
"The Harbour town I grew up in a tapestry of stories. Some history some legend. Some began with war, some spiritual and politcal awakenings. Some were even love stories. Those were always my favourites." Korra allowed herself to smirk, just a little. "Here today, is one of them, what Asami and I have. If you'd care to ask us it was a lifetime in the making, and we are the first to own up to our mistakes. Characters arent without flaws. The best stories are woven into the lives of those who tell them. They're guides. They're hope. I hope more kids like me can hear ours, and have what I never did."
"In the wake of a scandal like ours, people always look for the bad in the people that did it. They rarely look at the cause. I'm not here to lecture. I'm not going to ask for forgiveness or a chance to explain myself. What it did for me was put a lot of things in perspective. Might the path to my own happiness, with the woman I love, be less fraught if I'd had someone like me ahead showing me the way? Might. Would've. Should've. Could've. I wasted so much time being unhappy, because I thought the world I lived in would never allow my wildest dreams to come true and when they did, I realised happiness isn't something that just comes to you. You fight for it. You act on it every day. You campaign. You write your own happy ending, and you hope it might inspire someine elses..."
"Which is why, as of last night a law has been passed that no citizen of Harbour Town can be discriminated against because of their sexual orientation, whether in their careers, their homes, their well being or their marriage," Korra's every cell was shaking vigorously with every word. With every gasp she prompted from the crowd.
"Thank you," she was at heart a woman of few words, and thusly rushed the last two. When she was finished she all but ran to Asami's arms side stage, and kissed her quick, twice, with trembling lips before she lost her nerve. The room erupted in a clamour of incensed shouts, camera flashes, applause and questions.
"You did it," Asami's breath was husky with emotion, new to them both until recently and Korra decided she could listen to it forever. She could only respond by stuffing her face into the warm hollow of her throat, absorbing those long fingers scratching her scalp soothingly and the capillary waves that thrilled her whole being.
When they finally parted, Korra's free hand was taken up by her mother's, gazing at her with wonder before turning her attention to her father. Tonraq had dutifully re-taken his post, and much like a conductor would an orchestra, raised his hands and quietened the sounds.
"While I am in office, the midsummer solstice, marks the start of a new tradition in Harbour Town, one we sorely need - Pride week,"
"This is outrageous!" A dissenting voice pricked the Mayor's ears, Unalaq his brother stood looming in the back of the room, his children flanking him. Eska looking positively bored, and Desna eying the rainbow crowd with something oddly other than disdain.
"Write it on your ballot come election day," Tonraq responded cooly, lifting the bill for all to see and smiling for the camera's, even and open. Korra had expected a mixed reaction, but she could only look at the pride in the faces of those her allies, and could only hear their cheers over everything else.
Korra didn't quite know what to say to her parents, she was prepared for a much worse outcome way back when. On the dock, by the ferry, instead she was wordlessly clinging to her mother. The only errant thought in her head was that she wondered how she'd ever forgotten this feeling. Her hand rubbing soothing circles between her shoulder blades.
She felt safe in the knowledge her girlfriend was admiring the monster cruiser that ferried people from Republic City to Harbour Town, and that her father was explaining its long and boring history. Asami fingers were surely pursed on her lips as she listened, no doubt actually interested being the information gatherer she was. There was comfort that she at least knew these two people. Paradoxically there was also unmeasured happiness, that they could still surprise her after all these years.
"Was it everything you hoped for?" Her mother asked, gentle and contrite.
"More than," voice wavering, Korra made a point to squeeze her as she answered. "So much more,"
When they parted, Senna smiled at her sniffling, fingers still tweaking the edges of Korra's clothes in the same way she did whenever she dropped her off from school.
"I hope you know how sorry I am… that you didn't feel safe." Korra had had a sense, that through all the time they'd spent together in her home, Senna had been trying to find the words.
"I know,"
She'd sensed it in their encounters around the house and over meals. Lingering in their goodnights, and good mornings. Day time walks and nature trails. In her parents joint vigilance in keeping Asami upright, warm and (further) injury free. In the way she'd witnessed her mother squeeze her girlfriend's arm fondly, as she taught her to make sea weed noodles. When she'd actually managed to sleep in, and caught her patching up Asami's shoulder on the edge of the bathtub. Her girlfriend's skin howling red, and her expression moved to tears.
"I just-"
"No more of those," Korra assured her. It was long after that moment, that Korra realised that this was the first and only time she had ever swiped a tear from her own mother's cheek.
The ships horn signalled for last passengers to board, and they parted. Tonraq wrapped the trio of women in a masterful bear hug, before setting them back to ground. He made a point of bracing his hand aside Korra's cheek, they'd said goodbye not long before, but the instinct to repeat was strong. He did the same of Asami, smirking fondly at his daughters fierce friend and everything more.
"Are you ready?" Asami asked, fingers already lacing with Korra's.
"Let's do it," Korra replied, chest still fluttering with excitement at a hummingbird's speed.
Much had changed since she'd last boarded this ship; she was no longer dependent on dishonesty to feel safe, she was no longer a lone passenger and she was more certain in the bond she shared with the woman she loved than she ever thought possible.
"Where to first?" Asami pressed, combing hair over Korra's ear as they meandered into the lobby of the ship.
"I'm not sure," Korra admitted, "I thought we could get a bite, go to the arcade, I think there's a movie theatre nearby, or Photo Booth..? That's all kids stuff isn't it," she blanched, jaw locked as anxiety to impress flushed through her, "All of this was a lot more fun when I was nine,"
"It's fine Korra," Asami laughed, soothing her tirade with a sly kiss to her cheek, "Come to think of it I never did any of that stuff when I was nine,"
"Arcade first then," Korra grinned, leading her on triumphant.
She was vaguely aware of the watchers; the Venn diagram of people who knew who she was, had read the paper in the last few days, and were on this very boat today. For the first time she felt the luxury of not caring. Instead she basked in the decadence of beating Asami at air hockey, and getting her ass handed to her at ski-ball. It felt like a vacation she'd sorely needed, mostly from herself. Her heart beating to a symphony of splendour as her girlfriend tugged her into a photo booth and made a point of kissing her in a different place between flashes.
"What are you doing?" she asked, watching her slide more coins into the machine.
"A strip for you, a strip for me," Asami shrugged nonchalantly, framing her jaw with one hand and kissing her cheek, unable to stifle her own smile.
"Alright but this one's mine," Korra told her, taking control from her to catch her mouth firmly with hers. She tasted her breath hitching, and body go tense beneath her hands, and before either of them knew it, fingers were threaded in hair as the kiss devolved into something private and tender.
The photos had long since developed, but there was an unspoken agreement that this was possibly the last private place on the ship, and neither wanted to waste the opportunity at what was becoming their new favourite pastime.
Korra's lips strayed with a feather light touch to the crux of Asami's throat, enjoying low moan she gave as she long fingers grasped fistfuls of clothes. Using her foothold on the bench Asami yanked her tighter and pressed her into the wall feeling heat low in her belly as she reclaimed Korra's kiss-slick lips and bit and laved deeper than she knew she should. Gasping breaths filled the booth, and had they thought about it they would have been grateful for the blaring games and ditties covering the wanton sounds from the outside. As it was neither could pull themselves away from the intoxicating embrace and enthralling kiss.
"Oh look mom, the Lebanese ladies from the newspapers!"
They flinched at a tiny voice that was thankfully outside the curtain retaining innocence but instead had taken to admiring their photos that were thankfully PG kisses in comparison to the after.
"Oh dear!" said the mom, as the pair all but fell out of the booth, disheveled and cheeks howling red. Pulses pounding in their ears. Asami managed a polite smile as she claimed their photo strips and thanked the girl inexplicably, before Korra dragged her away by the hand.
Korra hid them in the first cabin she could find, shrouded in darkness. Asami cradling the photos to her chest, watched her lean against the door and take in three deep breaths. Then all of a sudden her aura blazed and sparkle as she started to laugh. Asami's heart leapt out of her chest at the sight, raising her hands to thumb the tears that slipped out. She decided she loved actively seeking Korra's joy, teasing it out of her, making her melt.
"Shh!" hissed a voice somewhere in the vicinity of their feet, snapping back the curtain of the lowest bunk on the left side. The snapping passenger stopped them briefly, but the levity was difficult to curtail.
Asami braced her forehead on Korra's shoulder as she sniggered quietly and Korra looked up at the ceiling, pained.
"We should have taken the jet," she lamented.
Asami kissed her cheek sweetly, and her thumb smoothed the palm of Korra's hand as she led her to the snug top bunk.
"If we had taken the jet, I wouldn't have an excuse to get this close to you,"
"If I kick you you'll fall like six feet," Korra pointed out.
"So don't kick me then," Asami offered, leaning forward to press her lips to hers as silently as she was able. Victory was Korra's hand bracing on the small of her back and tucking her securely to her front. When it was clear that kissing led down a path they couldn't particularly follow at that moment, all that was left was gentle ministrations of affection until one of them was able to sleep.
Asami's fingers traced patterns over Korra's temple in the dark, and she was sure she was about to succumb to the pull until her girlfriend spoke in a serious tone for the first time in as many hours.
"What now?" she didn't open her eyes, decided to err on the side of staying in this tender moment.
"Took you long enough," Asami teased half heartedly.
"I've never done this before,"
"You've dated I've seen you-"
"Not someone I loved." even in the dark she could see her smiling, eyes closed for love of saying it alone. "I know we haven't even had a first date yet but I kind if donxt want to wake up without you."
"What was this?"
"A boat trip," Korra whispered wryly, "We can do better than that,"
There was challenge in the thought, and it lit up something wild and hopeful in Asami's chest. A small voice in the back of her head reminded her she wasn't truly free until the divorce was final. On the other hand, nothing could stop them dating, and starting this thing for real, traditionally, perfectly. The idea spurred her with a new excitement; a fresh start with Korra, together.
"Well I don't sleep over on a first date, so you should know that,"
"I can't wait to know more about you," Korra was as whimsical as Asami had ever heard her. She felt her palm flatten on her spine, as though she could squeeze those secrets out of her.
"Well if we're going to do this, honest, girlfriend- girlfriend, I need you to promise me something," Korra opened her blues, somehow shining in their dark little cocoon to listen intently to her. "A counter promise to the one you gave me,"
Korra nodded, solemnly, the hand that was tucked under her ribs sliding up to brush her cheek.
"I need you tell me what you want, whenever you want it." Asami watched her take in the proposition. As she had omitted her unhappiness prior to their affair, so too had Korra denied her self what she wanted. Asami couldn't have that. "I don't care how, if it's a signal, or you starting to just take it from me, I want to know, because I'll never know enough of you Korra." Asami cupped her cheeks to bring it home, thumbs stroking parallel arcs under her eyes, "after all this time, the decades to come, I'm still hungry for it. I won't be complete until you show me what you want."
There was a moment of stillness, where before Asami would have second guessed herself, and the newfound trust they'd placed in each other. Korra however was stunned to silence by the sensitivity of the statement. She felt adored, and for once she knew what to do with it. Pitching forward to kiss her soft and sweet, nodding all the while.
"You'll know from now on I promise," she vowed. Spurred by her bravery, she attempted to tackle the next looming thought. "You don't have to hide out at mine anymore, will you go back? To that big house all by yourself?"
Asami smirked, it was too soon to move in together, but it would taste a lie it wasn't an idea she had been entertaining almost every hour they'd been together out here.
"I'll be fine going back, I was alone there before,"
"Yeah waiting for me or him-"
"I'm a big girl Korra, I can go back to my house by myself,"
"That's not what I'm saying, I just - you don't have to I could come to you,"
"I know," Asami hushed, thumb tracing her lower lip in the dark, "But not in the bed I shared with him," she tucked her fingers in the soft of Korra's hair at the nape of her neck. "We have to do this right. To date, sleep apart and sleep together,"
Korra fell to silence, cogs turning as she pondered what the next few days and months would look like.
"How long will it take to get a new one?" Korra pressed petulant and Asami chuckled.
"It's already there, just needs to be assembled and the old one thrown out,"
"Ah so you're asking for someone to help you put it together," Korra teased.
"They say it is the ultimate relationship test," Asami hummed.
"After what we've been through? It'll be a breeze,"
Song 2 - My Lover - Birdtalker
