DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe.
Thinking (+ flashbacks, Naruto speaking to Kurama, etc.)
Emphasis
Bijuu, etc. speaking
Bijuu, etc. thinking
Jiraiya was gone for nearly a week before he came back, and Naruto was so relieved, she nearly cried. "Ero-Sennin," she whimpered after nearly squeezing the life out of him, picking the big man up as she did so. "You were gone too long! Do you know how worried I was?" she pouted and then became irritated. "What do you think you're doing, leaving my training completely to the toads? I thought you wanted to see me succeed, goddammit! Were you out perving instead of mmrph?"
Jiraiya had the nerve to cover her mouth with his hand!
"Gaki, I told you I had things to do! And I'm fine." Granted, he escaped (and not too easily) from Konan this time and wasn't sure whether the woman was still planning to take revenge on Naruto for viciously murdering her Genin in a PTSD-induced rage or not. Naruto didn't need to know that, though. "You can show me what you can do as soon as we have lunch." He smirked at the way his goddaughter wilted. "I brought ramen!"
"This is why you're my favorite, Ero-Sennin," Naruto said, suddenly giddy. She skipped all around her god/grandfather as they walked over to a large palm leaf that was growing all by itself, unreasonably high and providing shade. She was nearly drooling for her favorite dish that Jiraiya was already unsealing after eating bugs for a few days. "I shoulda brought more human food, but I wanted Kakashi to remember me."
"Hmph! You are such an idiot, Naru-chan," he sighed as he flopped down to the ground. The little blonde was already inhaling ramen and looking a little murderous at his words before she even sat down. He opened up his own container of noodles and was glad that he'd stopped by Ichirakus for both the ramen and the intel he'd been given by Teuchi. "...Like Kakashi-brat's going to forget you; he's totally smitten," he mumbled bitterly under his breath.
"What?!" Naruto had Kurama-enhanced hearing so she heard him. "Do you really think so?"
"I know so. Stupid Hatake."
Naruto stopped mid-noodle slurp and bit off the noodles falling down her chin before swallowing. "Thanks a lot, Ero-sennin. Way to make me feel desirable," Naruto snarked, still smiling with a broth-covered chin.
"Now I just lost my appetite," Jiraiya lamented, putting down the bowl before picking it up again. Naruto was already beginning to inhale her third bowl and he shook his head, reminded once again of her parents. The blonde being "desirable" was not something he liked to think about, although Tsunade was right: both of the Sannin had lost their virginities before her age.
Again, not something he liked to think about.
1. Tsunade.
He still loved her, but boy was he pissed off at her. They had actually had an amazing night together, tender and beautiful, passionate and caring, all those years ago and Tsunade had said it was all a lie! ...Had told him that he'd dreamed up the whole thing!
"I don't want to hear about your bullshit, sex-starved dreams about me, you damn pervert!" she'd said the next afternoon.
And we produced a child, he sighed. And not just any child: Minato... Yeah, that's going to be hard or impossible to get over.
Thinking of Tsunade being with anyone other than him also still bothered him, as ridiculous and apparently self-sacrificing as that was. Even though he came to respect Tsunade's fiance, Dan, that never meant that he was absolutely fine with him "taking her away" from him in his own heart. He loved Tsunade, though - had always loved her - and wanted her happiness more than anything: more than his own. Their interlude had only come after Tsunade and he were wasted and broken down in the middle of a war…
2. Naruto and Kakashi.
Gross. Well, maybe not gross, but definitely not something he liked to think about.
Minato was going to strangle both or potentially all three of them in the afterlife, plus Hiruzen-sensei was definitely going down again, no matter how well-suited the two seemed to be for each other.
Kakashi had changed for the better, and he was right about what he'd said before: the brat was smitten with Naru-chan. How his god/granddaughter didn't see that, he'd never know.
Following his pity party, Jiraiya forced Naru-chan to spar with Pa, watching them with a keen eye, barely able to keep up with them until he, himself, went into Sage mode. "You're doing great, Naru-chan," he complimented, just as Naruto had to bend over, holding her mouth as she tried not to barf after having eaten so much just prior to training. "I'll give you thirty minutes to digest." (Actually, he was giving himself that long to better digest his ramen. He worried that he might not be able to kick the girl's ass considering how easily she was running around in Sage mode while keeping clones on standby at the same time if he wasn't at 100%.) "Then your opponent is me."
"Awesome," Naruto exclaimed and bounced before hurling her precious noodles. "No," she said as she gagged. "My ramen!"
Two hours later, both sages lay on the ground, drained. Ma and Pa gave them helpful bits of advice, and Jiraiya knew that he really needed to go back to training in Senjutsu if he was to stay ahead of his granddaughter/apprentice.
"Granddaughter." When did I get so old?
"Naruto, we need to talk about countering the effects of the Akimichi food pills and, of course, lava, should that be necessary." The blonde turned her head toward him, her face clearly expressing with that eyebrow lifted that she thought at least the latter was impossible. "There are a lot of people in Konoha that are going to pay to see you - or someone - kick an Iwa ninja's ass, Naru-chan. And, really, you should hope it comes down to you."
"You want to see me get turned into volcanic rock."
"Don't be ridiculous. I'm saying that sensei might put you in that battle with that Kurotsuchi woman for more reasons than one." Naruto only sighed and crossed her arms under her chest as she looked up at the clouds, her brows furrowed as she continued to listen, Jiraiya hoped. "One: he and the entirety of Konoha will want someone strong and with enough chakra left from their first fight to take on the Iwa kunoichi. Two: Kurotsuchi is considered the Iwa Princess; you are Konoha's Princess." He stopped Naruto before she could refute it: "You and Tsunade-hime," he said grimly.
He's still mad at her, Naruto knew. It was understandable, but "troublesome," she said accidentally, then slapped herself. She immediately reached into her obi to pay someone for her Nara outburst, then realized Jiraiya probably wasn't in on the betting.
"Yes, well... It's more than that, though," he continued, beginning to gesture as he became concerned and knowing that this was something his sensei would do. "A battle between Minato's legacy and the Tsuchikage's heiress? Psh. Give me a break: who wouldn't pay to see that?" Seeing the blonde glare up at the sky as she considered it more, he sighed and gave her the facts he'd been hearing around the village, at least among shinobi, when he was there for a few hours. "Naruto, the council has already leaked the word about your heritage. Not only that but if you fight and win against the Iwa kunoichi, you'll be seen village-wide as a heroine."
There was a long, pregnant pause before Naruto either laughed or scoffed, Jiraiya wasn't sure which.
"I was considered a heroine before ya know. In my first life, at least." She smiled over at her god/grandfather, but couldn't force it to her eyes. "After I defeated Pein - Nagato, whatever - and he brought everyone he'd killed since coming to Konoha back to life? People that used to hate or even abuse me began calling me Lady or Lord Naruto, depending on how blind they were, or if they'd seen the battle. ...I didn't have my bandages on and was wearing my giant orange jacket open," she said idly to explain what she'd just said, not realizing that Jiraiya didn't fully understand the shock her revealed gender caused some people in her past life. "It was... weird. No, it was kinda awful! The reactions of the population were suddenly entirely in my favor, except for my teammate, I guess..: the one Danzo kidnapped. What are we gonna do about Sakura-chan, anyway?"
Jiraiya let the Uzumaki (Hatake: how infuriating) continue rambling as she began to change topics, glad that she wasn't filled with utter hatred toward the entire village. They really owed the Naras for that.
"I told Jiji that he'd nabbed her, 'cause I sensed her in a cave, and a cave would be used by someone cartoonishly evil like Danzo: that eyeball stealing asshat. Then again, I told Jiji that the traitor was stealing Sharingan..."
"Naruto," Jiraiya interrupted her going off on Danzo again, tempted to remind her of exactly why she was on probation. "Have you ever considered that Danzo may not have stolen the Sharingan this time?"
Naruto stopped to think about it for a minute or so. "No! I mean, I don't see a lot of Uchihas around, and that bastard's a greedy motherfucker! Hey," Naruto shouted, quickly sitting up. "Is Shisui alive? You know? Uchiha Shisui, as in Sunshin no Shisui?"
Jiraiya thought of sunshinning away, himself, but that would just lead to too many questions. And Naruto has WAY too many questions... "Hmph! You're just trying to word your way out of training!"
"What?!" Naruto squawked, outraged. Plus, what the hell did that mean anyway?!
"I see how it is," Jiraiya baited her. "You think you can talk your way out of training hard and putting in the required amount of work!"
"Why you!"
"Ah-ah-ah, Naru-chan! It's said that the toad who wakes up earliest and works hardest gets the worms!"
"Don't talk about worms, you pervert! That's what I had for breakfast this morning!"
Jiraiya ignored her, already speaking again before he even got a chance to think about how mere "pervert" wasn't a great enough term to describe him.
"That's it! I've had enough of your insolence!" He almost wanted to laugh at the way half of Naruto's hair was rising dangerously up in the air while the girl both sweated over his words and looked like she wanted to strangle him. Convinced that she was too young to have a stroke, he continued. "We will train until sunset on your katas and ninjutsu, and after that, you'll stay awake to discuss the effects of those Akimichi food pills, plus, of course, we'll work on your fuuinjutsu until midnight."
Naruto's eyes bugged out of her head. "You mean it?! You'll really teach me proper fuuinjutsu?"
"Of course, I mean it. IF you behave yourself and train hard enough." And stop asking me those damn troublesome questions that I refuse to answer.
"Yes, yes, yes!"
"Get off me, you brat," Jiraiya said with amusement as he pushed his affectionate god/granddaughter off of him. "And if you do exactly what I ask of you without complaining, I'll let you visit Kakashi-brat."
"Yes!"
Gah. The things I do to cover your asses, sensei, Uchiha brats...
He missed her. How was it possible to be nearly forcibly married, to fall - dare he say or rather think it - hopelessly and madly in love, and to miss her already?! In such a short time?
Naruto crashed into Kakashi's life and made it so much better. He had no idea of whether or not he would continue to feel as strongly about her as he did now, but the young woman had rocked his world in more than one way, and he wouldn't give her up.
And he missed her. Just the way that his little wife said that she would miss him before she left! It was so unlike him to miss anyone's company who hadn't already departed the mortal realm, but here he was, married, in love, lonely, and stuck with Gai again. He watched as Buns sparred against Gai's minion, while the odd Hyuuga heiress continued to spar with her brat hot-for-Naru-chan Chunin cousin and shrugged at his green friend, wondering what he was supposed to do here.
"Rival! Your advice and honored suggestions would be most thankfully received! As the village's ninjutsu expert, you may have insight that I do not as I train my - and for the moment, Kurenai-san's - Genin to win their Chunin Selection Exam matches!"
"Maa, I suppose that's true," Kakashi said as he sat down and pulled his book up to cover his face more. Gai was quiet for several minutes before the black-haired man pushed Icha-Icha Paradise back down. Kakashi gave him his meanest glare, only wishing that it would deter the unstoppable force known as Gai.
"I wasn't really asking, Rival," Gai said in a low voice, a terrifying smile on his face that Kakashi knew meant trouble.
"Maa, maa, Gai-kun," Kakashi laughed after hesitating for a moment, giving his best friend/rival-he-didn't-want an eye smile as he snapped his book closed. "Hyuuga-chan's going up against one of Tenzo's Genin in the finals, and I should keep Sai-kun's secrets a secret."
Gai made sure his students were occupied. "Don't you mean Danzo's?" he hissed.
Oh boy, Kakashi thought, Gai's in a mood. "Maa, I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about." He opened his book again, saddened that he'd lost the page that was previously in front of him. He'd have to make Gai pay for that. "Why are you training Hyuuga-chan? Kurenai-san doesn't have any other Genin in the Finals." Gai slumped down beside him.
"She's 'visiting' Asuma-kun - it's actually a date - who is busy not properly training the young Nara and Akimichi Genin tonight," Gai said in what was definitely not a proper whisper. "Kurenai asked me to determine whether or not the heiress can improve her taijutsu, offering to spare young Shino-kun and Kiba-kun to train with Lee tomorrow in return for the favor."
Kakashi hummed, looking up at the Hyuuga spar despite his greater interest in being lazy. "The girl should take on her teammates together, instead." He went back to reading his book, wishing that he was doing the same thing to Naru-chan that the well-endowed Umi-hime was enjoying receiving from the rugged Rajaiya-san, and that Naru wasn't off playing with amphibians right now.
Icha-Icha characters never went off with toads. Human or amphibian!
As soon as she got back, he was having her sign the dog contract, at least as a signatory to send and receive messages. In his longing for his wife's presence, he'd summoned a fox to send a beautiful picture that he'd sketched of them, but the fox didn't like it - declaring it "pervy," which it definitely wasn't - and refused to cooperate.
Gai pushed his beloved book down again. "I know that! Do you think I don't know that the girl should take on her own teammates when Hyuuga-sama isn't training her?!" Gai spit. Kakashi shrugged which just pissed the taijutsu master off even more. "Young Kiba-kun cannot be persuaded to go full-out against Hinata-sama," he reluctantly admitted. While Gai enjoyed listening to gossip, he did not usually like passing it along.
"Interesting," Kakashi confirmed. He looked back up at the spars, knowing that he owed Gai one now. Not only could it now be implied that Kiba had taken an interest in Hinata, much like Hizashi had "taken an interest" in Tsume-sama, he also learned that Hiashi-sama was indeed training his daughter. He needed to let Tenzo know so that Tenzo could let Sai know. Hiashi was awfully good after all. "Buns will be fighting a wind user."
"Her name is Tenten-chan," Gai said in a somewhat threatening tone.
"Hai, hai. You should get Asuma off his lazy ass and have her see what it's like to go up against a good one. Maa, I don't think she'll do too well."
Gai's brow twitched, and he forced himself not to curse his rival out. He almost couldn't believe Kakashi had just dissed his beloved student! "She was hoping to have a youthful spar against Naruto-chan."
Kakashi slumped even further than was normal for him. "Naru-chan's training... Away," he said sadly. Having gotten used to a chatty, communicative person around him all of the time had influenced him. "She was even forced to dispel all of her clones, so I'm all alone," he pouted behind his mask, but would never admit it.
"RIVAL! I AM SO SORRY! I DID NOT KNOW ABOUT THE YOUTHFUL NARUTO-CHAN'S DEPARTURE! I heard that she was being punished, but I doubted it until now!"
Kakashi wanted to hit Gai for opening his big fat mouth. He wanted to hit himself for talking about his little wife in the first place! Now all of the Genin (and Hyuuga Chunin he still hadn't taught a lesson) were staring at him, looking for an explanation. "Naru-chan's fine, minna!"
"I believe it's Naruto-hime," Neji ground out, looking frustrated and annoyingly curious.
"Maa, maa, Gai-kun. Allow me to spar with Neji-kun, ne?" Kakashi really needed to vent some of his frustration, and that pretty-boy Hyuuga face looked like it could be just the thing to do the trick.
"NO!" Gai turned back to his youthful entourage. "We must continue expanding our youth! We have trained long enough for this evening. The sun has set but our spirits shall not! I suggest we depart to the Blunted Shuriken!"
Kakashi tried to sunshin away, but Gai had already grabbed him. The Hyuugas both blanched, but Tenten and Lee both shrugged their shoulders. Lee had never been to a bar before, and Tenten was tired but ready to party. She also had a kunoichi support group tonight, and it was rumored that Tsunade-sama had been their henged leader all along! And that she would reveal herself tonight! She decided to do what Tsunade-sama always did (if their leader was really her:) have a few drinks before hitting one of the bars they always met in. The Blunted Shuriken was a popular shinobi bar, but the support group almost always met one bar over, at the roomier Morning After.
The only thing that was good about being dragged to a crappy shinobi bar was seeing the various innocent faces color upon realizing that Asuma and Kurenai were a couple. And, squeezing into their booth with Gai to order a ridiculously strong drink while reading porn, thus pissing one, then the other off. "Maa, maa, Kurenai-san," Kakashi eye-smiled over his porn, as he continued speaking too loudly, "I didn't know you and Asuma-kun were an official item."
Kurenai smiled sweetly at him, although her eyes were narrowed. "I'm going to kill you," she whispered behind her hand. She looked toward Asuma for help but saw that her silly boyfriend was blushing like a bearded tomato and was already digging around for a cigarette. Knowing that their romantic evening was over, she also ordered a strong drink.
Supposedly Tsunade-hime had been the leader of the new kunoichi support group all along, and she would come out as herself tonight next door! She was so excited!
That's why she didn't simply genjutsu the smut-wielder immediately.
Actually, her Genin+comrades+That Pervert's entrance may have been a blessing in disguise. Asuma had just asked her to go home with him and had she said yes, she would've missed out on the chance to find out about Tsunade-hime. Anko was already next door, waiting for the meeting to start in what was probably a front-row seat, but Kurenai still really wanted to see the woman herself and learn exactly why she had started the group and what she was planning.
"What is good to drink here?" Lee asked curiously.
"Nothing," Neji said impatiently. If her father found out that Hinata-sama was here, there was no telling what he'd do.
"Aww, c'mon, Neji," Tenten said in exasperation. "It's not so bad. Their version of a Sex on the Beach is stellar! Oh shit!" Hinata's head had just bounced on the table. "Sorry, Hinata! My bad!" She proceeded to order a Sex on the Beach, making Hinata almost pass out again. Lee had the waitress go through dozens of drink names and descriptions before he decided to simply order a popular bottle of sake to share with Neji and Hinata.
Shikamaru and Choji had been walking by when they saw the group of Genin/one Chunin next to a table of their Jonin senseis. They strolled into the bar, the smile fading from Shikamaru's face as he realized that the Harbinger of Green Doom was about to drink. "Lee! No!"
It was like time slowed down. In one second, Shikamaru was yelling out a warning while at the same time Lee was taking a drink. The next second or two were distracting: some had turned toward him, while Lee only looked at his drink curiously before downing another. The young taijutsu master smiled up at Shikamaru, then exploded into action. Debris, tables and chairs, people, and liquid began flying everywhere, all victims of Lee's ultra-crazy, drunken taijutsu that Shikamaru had heard about in his first life. Shikamaru grabbed one of Choji's arms and sunshinned the hell out of there.
"Shikamaru! What the hell was that?" Choji asked, his eyes wide and darting around. Realizing that Shikamaru had sunshinned him back to the Nara compound gates, he panicked. "We've gotta go back there!"
"Huh-uh: no way! That guy... Lee, right? I don't think he can handle his liquor," Shikamaru said, putting his hands in his pockets. No way was he going back there. "Troublesome" didn't begin to describe what was happening at that bar. "If Naruto was here, she could drop a toad on his ass, but she's not, so that's it for me."
A blue-eyed blonde woman on a masked mystical moving mountain sneezed, causing the seal she was working on to explode in her face.
"But," Choji began, in disbelief that his best friend would leave his comrades behind like that, "I'm going back. Sorry, Shikamaru, but I'm going back with you or without you!"
"C'mon, Choji!" Shikamaru's words went unheeded as Choji sunshinned away. "Seriously?" he asked no one. Shikamaru groaned and knew he had to go after his friend. "What a drag!" He arrived at the scene of what used to be a full bar just as a green streak shot through the street and into the Hokage Mountain.
*BOOM*
"Huh," Shikamaru said, wincing a bit as he remembered what his former Hokage had been like to work for. So the rumors were true, he thought. There in the middle of the street stood Senju Tsunade, having obviously just punched a new body-sized fracture into the bottom of the Hokage Mountain by way of Rock Lee, directly (but far) underneath Namikaze Minato's face. A green heap was lying under the new fissures, and Shizune was already running toward the unconscious Genin.
"Who the hell was that?!" Tsunade barked. She picked up a huge slab of rock with one hand and flung it behind her, crushing it into tiny pieces as she did so. The Jonin Shikamaru noticed earlier crawled out from where the slab had been, completely covered with dust and gravel. Gai was madly searching for his students who were found moments afterward.
Shikamaru was the one who had to point Gai toward Lee. The man took off, wailing about paying for the damages incurred; promising to rebuild the bar himself, or do 10,000 push-ups, etc., etc.
"Hey, you're that Nara brat!" Tsunade said as she smiled at him. Shikamaru's eyes grew wide and he wondered if Naruto had told her the truth about their time-traveling. She wasn't supposed to! It was already bad enough that she'd told Jiraiya!
Boy, was Shikaku glad that he'd accompanied his wife to her little meeting tonight! Now, where did she go? "Troublesome," Shikaku said, seeming to appear out of nowhere. "No, that would be me, Tsunade-sama."
Shikamaru rolled his eyes. It seemed his dad still had the not-so-secret hots for the older woman.
"Aa," Tsunade said as she looked over both Naras. "This must be your son, then. My granddaughter has talked about you."
Shikamaru had no idea who the hell she was talking about. Naruto used to (insanely) call the woman "baa-chan" but it's not like she was really her grandmother. Was the former Godaime drunk? She was usually at least a little drunk! "Thank you, I... guess?"
"Troublesome," Shikaku said again, shaking his head disapprovingly at his son. Why couldn't the boy behave himself or get out of the way?
"So it is true, Tsunade-hime," Yoshino said, shocking her husband speechless and glaring at him: a look that promised punishment. "Welcome back."
"HA! Thank you! Yoshino, right? I've heard great things about you from both the Pervert and my granddaughter. C'mon, any kunoichi worth her salt, let's go, let's GO," Tsunade repeated as she took Yoshino's arm. She was glad to see that the Morning After Bar was still in one piece. Made things easier.
"I want to come! Can I come?"
Naruto was immediately tackled by a filthy Copy Nin. "What are you doing here... what... What happened to you?!"
"What happened to you?" Naruto asked, not realizing how outrageous she looked, the hair around her face fried, her face blackened with sealing ink. Ma had been so angry with her for blowing up her bedroom, she had summoned both sages back to Konoha.
Kakashi was covered with the dirt and dust that were thick in the air. She and Jiraiya had obviously missed something.
"Let's go, Naruto," Tsunade called over her shoulder.
"What is happening?" Naruto asked. Kakashi had begun to insist that she come home with him despite all of the people that were gathering around. She tried to move away, feeling shy with all of the attention they were causing themselves mid-attack of some kind, but once again found just how obstinate the man could be. Even more embarrassing, she heard Asuma whispering to Kurenai-sensei about them being married. He was holding onto the now-shocked woman who had looked like she was going to attack them before he explained their relationship.
Did no one in this town know how to whisper properly?! They were ninjas for gods' sake!
Oh gods, Tenzo, Sasuke, and Sai were here and they'd stopped searching through the damaged bar to stare at them! Sai was giving her a thumbs up but Sasuke looked gobsmacked. They heard! Naruto squeaked and tried to hide behind her husband. Her outed husband!
He must be so embarrassed to be married to her!
"Brat," Tsunade said, suddenly in Kakashi's dirty face, "go home and I'll have her back there in a couple of hours."
"She has to be accompanied by Jiraiya-sama or me," the stubborn Jonin replied, tucking - or trying to - tuck his little wife under his arm. She kept moving away from him.
"It's fine, Kakashi. Go clean up: you're a mess," Jiraiya said tiredly, stepping forward. He was covered with sealing ink on one side, from the waist up. "I think I'd better stay and secure the place anyway." The Toad Sage gave Tsunade an unhappy look. He had thought that Tsunade's idea of an insurrection was bullshit, but now that he'd gotten word of the vast appeal of her supposed "Kunoichi Support Group," Jiraiya wondered if the woman was serious. Was his former teammate using this forum to mount a revolution? A coup? It was hard to imagine, but Tsunade was certainly disgusted with what their sensei had allowed to rise up in the village: from huge things like the Uchiha massacre, all the way through things like arranged marriages, the breakdown of laws, to expectations for honey-pot missions.
In some ways, Jiraiya regretted ever telling his teammate about the village gossip, but he'd always trusted Tsunade implicitly before. She had been the only one he COULD trust and count on.
Look how that had bitten him in the ass.
Why couldn't she just kill Danzo instead of all this… whatever it was? She was probably the only person who could get away with it!
What a boon offing the Elders would be to Konoha!
"Tsunade," he whispered and gestured to the far side of the building, not seeing the way the woman's eyes flickered with hope. She followed him to the nearby alley, greeting a few other women on the way, and promising that she'd meet them at the bar soon. "You need to watch what you say in there..."
"Now, now, Pervert," Tsunade interrupted with a sad smile. It was hard to look him in the eyes, but Jiraiya didn't seem to have that same problem. "This is just a few women with similar experiences, plus those we don't want to see go through what we have in our profession. Is that a problem?"
"If that were it? No," Jiraiya said seriously before forcing his teammate to look at him, eye to eye. "You could have a plant in there, Tsu; one that could leak and end up sending you to prison."
"I don't think so," Tsunade said, although she wasn't completely confident. "The group's only become larger thanks to our... shared experiences, as I said." Shared experiences because of the leadership of a senile old fool of a Hokage, Tsunade thought bitterly. She loved the old man as if he were a decent stepfather, but he needed to be replaced. "I'd thought of asking our members to wear seals..."
"Loyalty seals? You've gotta be kidding..."
"Not the kind that damned Danzo forces on his drones," Tsunade replied hotly, then thrust a piece of paper into his hands that had a seal drawn on it. "Found it in Grandfather's library," she explained. "It should do the trick. Want to help me put it on those that are willing?"
Jiraiya sighed. "Fuck... I've... I need to see how it works, first. I'll stick one on Naruto."
"Why Naru-chan?" Tsunade asked, wondering if it was a good idea to stick another seal on a jinchuuriki. ...One who happened to be their granddaughter.
"Why not? She's up for anything: weird girl."
Tsunade chuckled and looked toward the crowds on the main thoroughfare. "Kakashi's not being very discrete," she observed as the Jonin was now across from the alleyway, trading murderous glances with the Uchiha brat and trying to hold on to his wife who was as red in the face as a beet. Naruto looked like she wanted to bury her way into the ground.
"Those two are idiots," Jiraiya lamented. "Naruto said she thought Kakashi would forget her if she didn't leave food for him."
Tsunade cackled and had never been happier to see Jiraiya smile at her the way he did. It was gone in a heartbeat, but it was a start. "You can come, just henge yourself as a woman, Beautiful," she said, smirking as she walked past him. She threw one last thought over her shoulder. "And seal the place up for me when we begin, ne?"
Jiraiya henged and couldn't believe he was going along with this. He had to find out what was going on though, and it seemed that almost every kunoichi, no matter what their status was here and thrilled that his teammate was leading them. Sealing the back of the room first, he turned around and crossed his arms over his henged bountiful bosom.
"Ladies! I don't believe I've introduced myself properly," Tsunade said, smiling widely at all of the women in the room - and Jiraiya, who had sealed up the bar nicely. "Welcome, one and all, to the Kunoichi Liberation Front!"