Chapter Twenty Four
The next few days, their group still hadn't come to a unanimous decision on how to handle the whole Azula situation. Toph and Sokka were pro "smash and attack", despite the fact that no one was sure where Azula had gone. She was too cunning to stick to her old lair and with the Dai Lee at her disposal, making a new hiding spot would be easy. Suki and Iroh were reaching out to several of their contacts trying to gain information on any recent sightings. Aang, true to his air nomadic ways, was attempting to pose peaceable, non-violent solutions. Katara shook her head at each proposed idea, pointing out potential flaws. This mostly meant Sokka, Toph or Aang would propose something ludicrous while she poked holes in it; occasionally with Suki or Iroh's help. Zuko however seemed not to be paying attention, it seemed as if he were a million miles away.
Zuko hadn't let any of his usual advisors attend this meeting. They may have thought they knew Azula, but only those in his intimate circle of friends knew the truth. She was unpredictable and cruel; an opportunist that had no qualm with picking out the weakest link and extorting it. But at the same time… she was still his sister. His mother was lost to him long ago, his father even before that. Azula could be hateful and full of spite, but images of her as a young girl, still innocent, gave him pause. Armed with the knowledge that she had chosen Zuko and Katara to bear the indignities of her defeat, her chosen villains in her own perilous plight, he knew she had to be dealt with swiftly and permanently, but couldn't bring himself to dwell on being her undoing again.
When it became rather evident that nothing had been resolved, he called an end to the meeting. His friends began to shuffle out the door, chatting amongst themselves as Zuko absently shuffled through the papers on the desk before him, never noticing the worried eyes that tracked his movements. Katara was about to go to him when Aang suddenly appeared before her.
"Hey Katara! You know I've been asking around and I've heard that there's a really neat zoo just outside the city. They're supposed to be really popular." He told her cheerfully.
Katara tore her gaze from Zuko to focus on her boyfriend. A tight band of anxiety wound around her chest, making it hard to breath as her heart raced. A zoo? Outside the city? Echoed in her mind. She could see the oppressive crowds, pressing all around her, trapping her, keeping her from knowing who and what was around her. The scene from the market place nagged at her, reminding her of the last time she had been in a bustling mass of people. Aang looked so eager and sweet, it physically hurt her to turn him down. "I don't know Aang, it sounds like a lot of people…" She trailed off, rubbing her arms awkwardly.
"But you'd be with us! Sokka, Suki and Toph are going too." He tried to persuade her, but his smile seemed forced now.
"I don't think so Aang…" She reached out to touch his shoulder. "Maybe next time?" She offered with a small wince.
"Yeah, next time…" He agreed sounding a bit dazed.
Feeling awkward and embarrassed, she quickly excused herself and let her feet lead her quickly away, blindly following corridors as she stared at the floor. She passed through doorways and down hallways until she found herself outside. In the open, her breathing eased, but her mind still raced. She quickly looked around then hurried in the direction of the gardens. Instinctively she headed towards the sound of water and found a little ornate fountain, splashing in the dazzling sun and encircled by a carved bench. She sat and let her mind race, trying not to let it rest on any one thing for too long as she watched her distorted reflection.
She heard him humming before she saw him round a few tall hedges. "Ah, Katara!" He called cheerily. "What are you doing out here?" Iroh asked as he made his way towards her.
She reigned in her thoughts and schooled her expression. "Just thinking."
"Ah yes, this is quite a lovely spot you have picked to let the mind wander." He sat beside her on the bench. Katara didn't respond and continued to watch the ripples in the fountain. They sat in silence, listening to the sparrowkeets in the trees. "You know," Iroh confided softly, "it really is a spectacular zoo."
Before she realized what she was doing, Katara was shaking her head and her arms were wrapped around herself. She stopped shaking her head and forced her hands back into her lap. "I think that it might be a little too crowded for me." She told him as calmly as she could.
"That may be true." Iroh conceded. "Hard to know who may be in a group so large." He nodded.
Iroh was so gentle and there was no judgment in his golden eyes as he was careful to not watch her directly. It was no wonder she found herself confessing to him. "I don't like crowds. Especially not after that day in the market. And a zoo? I don't know how they can be thinking of things like that while Azula is still out there. I hate that I'm afraid to leave, that I can't really leave. There is nothing I can do to help until we figure out what we're going to do about Azula and how to find her. I've never felt so useless before." Except maybe when you were in the dungeons at Cane's mercy. A cruel voice whispered in her mind. "Almost never at least." She amended.
She felt calmer after her little tirade and Iroh seemed to be seriously considering everything she had just told him. "You, my dear, are probably the furthest thing from useless." Iroh said kindly. "You have suffered unspeakable trauma and you are coping remarkably well. Torture is not just for the body, but for the mind, and I have found that those wounds take much longer to heal. It is difficult, but you must learn to be patient with yourself. You are healing. You would not expect someone with a broken leg to just get up and walk it off. Others may not understand, but in time they and you will learn to work around it and you will be all the stronger for it."
Katara let it sink in for a moment. Ragged pieces of her soul seemed to smooth out under the truth of his words. She had not realized she had felt so lost until Iroh had managed to label the problem for her. "Thank you Iroh. I really appreciate it."
"If you ever need anything, please, feel free to ask." Iroh said as he hauled himself to his feet. "Well I must be off; I have a standing arrangement with a fellow Pai Sho player." Iroh gave her a little wink and left her with her thoughts once more, but only after being sure he had left her in better standing than he had found her.
She didn't know how much time had passed when she heard the scuff of shoes approach. She looked up and found Zuko, approaching slowly and sure to make noise to warn her of his presence. She smiled at his consideration. "I thought I might find you out here." Zuko was dressed in rich, red royal robes that draped over his body luxuriously and intricately stitched in golden thread. His long black hair was swept up into a careful topknot with the golden flame of the crown perched atop his head. He looked resplendent and regal which seemed at odds with his nervous demeanor as he approached her cautiously.
She stretched, realizing just how long she'd been sitting there and just how long she had been examining him. "Care to join me?" She asked, gesturing to the place beside her where Iroh had sat earlier.
"Actually…" He said and he drew nearer. "I have a surprise for you." He said with an air of mystery and a crooked smile that only pulled at one corner.
"A surprise?" She asked skeptically, raising an eyebrow at him.
"Yes." He said simply with a shrug. "As a matter of fact, I'd even consider it a favor."
"Ah." She said teasingly. "Well if that's the case…" He reached out to help her up. She eyed him dubiously once she was standing. "What's with the full on Fire Lord ensemble?"
He gave her a mischievous grin that she couldn't help but return. "It's all part of the favor."
"I thought it was a surprise?"
Zuko laughed and gently grasped her elbow and began to steer her from the gardens. "Come on." He said amiably. Zuko led her to the front of the palace where several guards were waiting. A rather harried servant rushed forward, all subservient bowing and an air of eager-to-please.
"Do you require a palanquin my Lord?" He asked, scraping low again.
"No need. A carriage shall do. We are going a long ways." Zuko replied benevolently.
"Right away your Lordliness." And he quickly scurried away.
"Lordliness?" Katara asked quietly.
Zuko shook his head sighing. "It used to be worse, trust me." Shortly a carriage drawn by ostrich horses pulled up and the footman helped first Katara and then Zuko inside. Zuko drew the curtains back from the windows as the trundled along, several mounted guards keeping pace with the carriage. Grand mansions and people in splendid finery were abound, but the further they traveled, the less extravagant the buildings and people. It was indeed a long trip till they reached the destination in what must have been the poorest part of the city. Dirty children in raggedy clothes roamed the street in noisy crowds, several haggard merchants hawked wares from rickety carts or stands. The carriage came to a jolting halt outside of an old warehouse. The carriage door opened and the footman helped them down, a look of disapproval on his face for his Fire Lord being in such a place. Several palace guards flanked them as Zuko strode towards the ware house.
Katara was about to ask where they were when a bedraggled woman in a stained nurses uniform rushed out the doors to meet them.
"Wu Li." Zuko greeted, nodding.
"Fire Lord Zuko." She said bowing low. "We are honored by your visit."
"Wu Li, this is my friend, Lady Katara. She is a water bending master and I thought it might benefit her to come with me."
The woman, Wu Li, who upon closer inspection was older than Katara had realized; gray hair mixing in with the black that was tucked up under a white cap, lines around her eyes and mouth, took Katara's proffered hand and bowed over it. "We are honored to have you Lady Katara."
"Glad to be here…" Katara murmured, looking to Zuko for answers. The title of "Lady" was odd to her and she still had no idea where they were.
Zuko smiled minutely and motioned Wu Li to lead the way as the three of them walked abreast, closely followed by the soldiers. "Wu Li runs the free clinic here." He explained. "I've been reaching out and trying to help in any way I can."
Wu Li beamed graciously. "You are most generous Fire Lord."
"It is the least I can do for my people. Wu Li contacted me recently saying they were short on supplies. I decided to come down myself to see what I could do to help." He turned the warm smile from Wu Li to Katara and she felt her breath catch and her chest squeeze for a moment.
"My parents started this clinic when I was very young." Wu Li explained as she led them through some doors and started a tour of the clinic. There were rooms upon rooms packed with dingy cots and old chairs. Nearly every single one was occupied by men, women, children and elderly in various states of well being tended to by nurses and doctors clothed in hospital white. "My father was an accomplished doctor in the hospital on the rich side of town. When he met my mother, they started treating the less fortunate for free after hours. The director of the hospital eventually found out and he was fired so he started his own practice out here after he bought the warehouse. Most of the family fortune is gone," she smiled sadly as she looked to Katara. "It was all spent to keep this clinic open for those who needed help but couldn't afford it."
"That's incredible Wu Li." Katara said fiercely. "You and your parents have done so much for these people."
Wu Li looked surprised and flattered. "Merely doing my duty My Lady."
"So Wu Li, your letter mentioned you were starting to run low on supplies." Zuko redirected the conversation.
"Yes." She said. "We are nearly out of bandages. We grow most of the herbs we need for medicine here, but there are some things we can't make from our garden. Also, we've had a lot of fevers lately and our freezer is broken, so we have no ice to cool our patients."
Katara's fingers flicked to the canteen at her hip. She was just itching to get started. Zuko had been watching her with barely contained bemusement. "Wu Li, if you could, would you make me a list of all the supplies you're in need of? And when I get back to the palace I can have one of my men bring by a freezer from my own kitchens as soon as possible."
The older woman's eyes lit up and she bowed quickly. "Thank you Fire Lord! I'll just be a moment." And she hurried away.
Katara immediately whirled on Zuko. "I'm ready."
Zuko suppressed a smile and gave her a false confused look. "Ready for what?"
Katara put her hands on her hips. "I know this is why you brought me out here." She said impatiently but was met with a warm smile that made her hands fall back to her sides. She started again in a friendlier voice. "These people need help. You're doing your part and now I'm ready to do mine. Obviously I can help with the ice for now and I'm a healer."
"I knew you'd be able to help." Zuko longed to reach out to her tenderly, but in such a public place it would be a bad idea so instead he clasped his hands behind his back.
She stared up into his eyes with a set determination, hope making her softer than she had been in a long time. "Finally I have something to do." Zuko peered at her curiously so Katara glanced around before continuing. "With no plan and nothing to do about Azula, I finally have something to contribute again."
Zuko opened his mouth to protest but he closed it again and nodded. "Do you want me to wait for you?" He asked, hating that Wu Li was approaching.
She shook her head. "No. I don't know how long I'll be here and you have more important things to do."
He wanted to protest again, but knew she was right. He held out a hand for the list Wu Li held. "I'll take this list and get what you need as soon as I can." He looked up at Katara so she knew he was addressing her as well. "I'll have a carriage bring the freezer and some guards here. Wu Li, in the mean time Lady Katara has volunteered her services." He softened his voice as he faced Katara. "The carriage will be waiting for whenever you are ready to come back. Extra guards will be posted to ensure your safety."
Wu Li bowed first to Zuko then Katara. "Thank you my Lord. Thank you my Lady."
Zuko watched Katara a moment then seemed to make up his mind. "I'll see you when you return."
Katara wiped her brow. She had been running full speed for the last however many hours it had been. She had first been presented with a large tub of water which she had frozen solid and then with a sharp motion of her fingers, the ice had crackled into small pieces which could be used in rags to cool fevers or bring down swelling. Wu Li had guided her to a large room of sick or injured people and described how each patient had a file at the foot of their bed with their patient information, including what appeared to be the problem.
Slowly, methodically, Katara had worked her way through the rows of patients. She would introduce herself, talk to the patient, read the chart and then followed a stream of water and that unearthly blue glow. Some patients were severe enough that after one session, their condition improved, but not enough to fully discharge them. Healing was exhausting work and with so many people that needed her, she could only do what she could for each instead of exhausting herself to bring a few to perfect health. Fatigue weighed heavily on her and on this brief break, she closed her eyes and felt her body sway, her feet ache and her stomach growled.
A warm, firm hand on her shoulder startled her out of her reverie. "Lady Katara." It was Wu Li smiling kindly at her. "Please, allow me to walk you to the carriage."
Feeling alert, Katara blinked at her. "But aren't there more patients?"
The woman's eyes crinkled in her withered face, but her grip was strong as she started to lead Katara down the hallway. "There will always be more patients." Wu Li said tenderly. "But you are exhausted. If you push yourself too hard, you'll be in one of these beds right along with them." She held the door open where two guards quickly flanked the women as Katara climbed into the carriage that had been waiting for her.
"Thank you Wu Li. Would it be alright if I came back again?" Katara asked, lightly gripping the older woman's hand.
Wu Li patted it gently and gave her a warm smile. "It would be my honor if you came back again. You've been such a blessing."
"Good night." Katara said, feeling content as the carriage rolled away.
She had been zoning out as they drove through the streets; she was worn out and content when they pulled up to the palace. The footman helped her down and she wandered up the broad steps. She passed room by room when she came across Iroh before a fire with a tray containing tea and snacks.
"Good evening Iroh." Katara said tiredly.
"Ah! Katara. Would you care to join me?"
A nice cup of tea did sound good. She sat across from him as he poured her a cup.
"So," he asked as she took a sip. "How was it?"
Feelings of gratitude and satisfaction from being useful filled her. "It was good." She said and took a long draw from her tea.
"And what did you think of our Wu Li?" Iroh asked, not looking as he placed a few small pastries on a plate and passed them to the exhausted water bender before him.
Katara picked up a pastry and began absently gesturing with it. "She's absolutely incredible! It's amazing that she kept that place running and she's so smart too! I've learned so much already in just a day." Satisfied she took a large bite and her eyes widened in pleasure at the flavor.
Iroh chuckled lightly. He let her eat and drink a moment in undisturbed peace. "Do you think you'll go back?"
Katara swallowed in a rush, then took a moment to brush crumbs from her lips and clothing. "I told her I'd be back, probably tomorrow." She smiled at Iroh who studied her for a moment. She dropped her eyes as doubt crept into her voice. "As longs as that's okay, of course."
"Of course." Iroh agreed readily. "A carriage and guards will be readily available whenever you'd like." He smiled warmly. He liked this young woman. Tenacious and strong, smart and compassionate.
The fire was warm and her belly full, her eyelids weighed heavily as the full day's work settled over her and she yawned.
"Off to bed with you then." Iroh waved her away affectionately. "If you intend to go back to the clinic tomorrow, you'll need a full nights rest.
Katara nodded sleepily. "Good night Iroh."
"Good night Katara."
She let her feet tiredly shuffle through the halls, rubbing her eyes in a tired manner as she made her way back to her room. Once there, she striped from her dirty blue robes and pulled on a silken read sheath of a night gown on, enjoying the cool fabric as it kissed her skin.
She was just pulling back the sheets on her ridiculously luxurious bed when a soft knock came from the secret panel. Instinctively a hand went to her hair to smooth it down and she adjusted her nightgown, making sure it fell just right before calling out a quiet, "Come in".
A soft mane of black hair preceded Zuko as he cautiously poked his head through the opening. Seeing her watching him expectantly, he stepped through, wearing soft trousers and a dressing robe of rich red hung open off his shoulders.
"Zuko." She said, smiling.
"Evening Katara." He tilted his head in greeting and paused a moment, watching her. He was silent a long moment before he continued. "You were, uh, gone, for a long time."
"I'm sorry." She apologized automatically and her fingers twisted in a lock of long, dark hair.
"No! No… That's not what I meant." He said quickly, taking a few steps towards her, arm outstretched before he slowly curled his fingers in and let his arm drop. "Did you at least enjoy yourself?"
Katara smiled tenderly and came around to sit on the edge of the bed. "Well, I don't know if being around sick and injured people all day and healing would really be considered enjoyable." She said with a small smile.
He flopped down next to her on the bed. "That good, huh?" He teased.
She pushed him playfully and they both chuckled. Then she leaned her head on his shoulder. "Thank you Zuko."
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, holding her against him. "It was Uncle's idea."
"I know." She turned her head to peer into his face. "What would I do without you two?"
He met her eyes, and then quickly looked away, staring at the wall instead as his arm stiffened slightly around her. "You would be fine." He said full of conviction.
Katara turned her face away from his so she could nuzzle into the crook of his shoulder, hiding from the truth she was about to speak. "No, I don't think I would be." Her eyes were closed but she could feel his surprise.
"Katara… You're a water bending master and… and probably the strongest woman I've ever met." Katara didn't notice, but the words had stuck in his throat and his pulse had doubled.
She felt the sting of tears but refused to let them fall. She shifted so her whole body was pressed against him and he encircled her in both arms. She waited until she knew her voice wouldn't shake. "It's just that… It's been so hard. I don't feel like myself anymore. I used to be so confident, but now I doubt myself and I'm afraid." She hated sounding weak, but knew she could tell him, knew he wouldn't judge her and would understand and she had to tell someone. "But today, today I felt like myself again. I couldn't sit around anymore, doing nothing, waiting for Azula, being afraid. Today, I helped a lot of people and that's what I needed. What I've always needed, so thank you." She wrapped her arms around him in return and they held each other for a moment.
"I would do anything to help." Zuko said quietly before resting his chin on top of her head. Abruptly he started to disengage himself. "It's late and you're exhausted. I'll let you get some sleep."
Her arms tightened around him for a moment but she let go, trailing her hands over him as he pulled away, catching his hand before he stood. She watched her hand wrapped around his instead of his face as he turned to look at her. "Stay? Please?" Her face burned at the request so she kept it averted, watching their hands instead. "At least for a little while, until I fall asleep."
He hesitated and she peered up through her lashes and saw the indecision on his face. "Alright…" They climbed into bed and he lay stiffly on his back next to her. Suddenly very tired, Katara moved his arm so it was perpendicular to his body and settled herself against him, curling around the edges of him as she pillowed her head on his shoulder, an arm across him, her hand splayed on his bare chest, barely aware of her actions from the weariness. He relaxed under her touch and his arm that was beneath her head curled to cuddle her close, drawing lazy circles on her back and that was how she fell asleep.
Sarahplainntall here! Sorry it took me so long. The internet has been sketchy at best. Please enjoy. Comments and Reviews are very much appreciated! Thank you for reading.