A big thank you to all my readers! and for all the comments and kudos, you guys are great.

Of course, a special thank you to the freak circle, and my beta EmeraldJewelSparkle, she really helped me out on this one, helped me stay in character and keep a balance of the craziness.

Disclaimer: I do not have the rights to SOA and make no profit off my writing. Anything you don't recognize from the show I have created.

Content Warning: This fanfiction is rated M. Please respect that warning and do not read this if you do not want to read M rated material.

2022

Age 30

Gabby was completely and utterly overwhelmed. The wake had yet to even start and men continued to poor into the clubhouse. It was a funeral, not a party; the mood was somber and the large crowd still fairly quiet. Even the sweet butts were dressed and acting accordingly.

Carol was heading up the food in the kitchen, having shooed Gabby away, when Quinn had engulfed her in a hug and insisted she meet Hap's old riding partner Hammer. The other girls were serving drinks and filling plates with food for men that had ridden all night to get here.

Gabby made the rounds almost systematically. Greeting the arriving men, directing the few old ladies where they could go to wash up from the ride. Assisting the non-patches that showed up to pay respects, sending visiting prospects one way or another to help, and continuously making her way back to Vivica who was receiving an onslaught of hugs apologies and words of regret.

Thank god for Becky and Vicky, and hell even Carol, Gabby loved that damn sweet butt right now. Vicky never left her sisters side. Becky was assisting with the rounds, escorting old ladies to free rooms, checking that the bathrooms remained clean and stocked and continuously checking on Vivica. She also showed up at Gabby's side repeatedly to help with whatever she needed taken care of. The only thing Gabby has lost control of was the children. She had no idea where they were.

She had set Kristen Mathew and Suzie up in the construction company's office with toys coloring books and a movie on the Ipad. They had been fine the first time she checked on them. The second time they were just gone. The movie had been turned off, the toys were shoved neatly into a pile in the corner and the kids were gone. She also however could not find her husband or her father and since she could still occasionally hear a shriek of laughter from the girls she knew they were close by and safe. She tried to shove the 'mother knows best' mentality aside and allowed whoever had the kids to keep them out of the way of the ever arriving motorcycles.

And then Casper Happy and Shark walked into the clubhouse with no kids and her heart literally stopped. She must have gone pale as well because Casper was immediately at her side kissing her temple.

"Redwood's here, got the kids love. Take a break and get a drink." She let out the breath she was holding and laid a hand on Casper's flat stomach as she turned into him.

"I'll drink later." She assured him and reached up for a kiss before heading outside.

The first thing Gabby noticed about the group was that Gemma was not with them. She wasn't up to date on all of Charming's gossip but she did know that Tara had finally won the long drawn out power play and Gemma rarely showed her face around the club. She had even turned over the TM office to Juice's old lady.

Vin came running through the lot and skidded to a stop next to Gabby. "I swear I knew they were up here." He assured her with a guilty look. So Vin had broken them out of kiddie jail. She nodded her head in a 'yeah, sure' manor and walked up to the group.

Kristen was already up in Chibs arms, Tig had Mathew and Jax was happily chatting with Suzie. Bikers and children; the idea was uncomfortable at best, the visual was smile inducing and often very sexy.

Jax was the first to see Gabby and smiled at her. He handed Suzie off to V-Lin and hugged her tight before greeting Vin at her side.

"I'm sorry we're not here under better conditions." He assured Vin and turned back to Gabby. "You look good sis. Tara and the boys are behind us in the van, sitting in traffic. Got two prospects with 'em you can have."

"Thanks Jax, how are you guys doing?"

"We're good. Charming's calm. You should come up for a visit." Gabby glared at him. She hadn't stepped foot in Charming since the day she moved out. "Show Kristen where you grew up."

"The house Emily nearly burned down, the neighborhood I wouldn't even drive my kids through or the studio above the barbershop?"

Vin pretended not to hear and stepped forward to greet the rest of the Redwood brothers. Jax hugged Gabby tight and whispered into her ear, "I'm sorry Gabby, I will always be so sorry."

"What exactly is the Sons definition of incest?" Jax pulled away from Gabby and laughed as he greeted Casper with a hug.

"Just sayin', shit knows blood don't matter. So when I see my brother groping my old lady…that he calls sister…"

"And the kid of two other brothers…" Jax added and smirked at Casper as he went on to hug Tom Tom.

Gabby ducked away from the joking and accepted hugs from the rest of the men, even Charles and Box, Charming's only new patches in all the years Gabby had been gone.

Tig hugged her tight, careful not to mash Mathew between them, and kissed her head. "How are you doll?"

"Busy, but alright." Gabby and Tig didn't talk at all on the phone unless Tig was calling for a visit. And the visits were between Tig and the kids, supervised visits. Anything more had yet to be discussed, Gabby wasn't offering and Tig wouldn't risk asking.

Casper must have talked to Happy because both men had stayed out of Tig and Gabby's business. Neither gave an opinion or asked when or if he was visiting. Both also made themselves scarce but available when Tig came to town. Casper was always home but locked away in the den on the computer. Happy seemed to have a sixth sense of Tig being in town and would show up to see the kids and politely offer to leave when he 'noticed' Tig.

"Uncle Tiggy." Mathew called and tugged on Tig's goatee.

"Ouch buddy." Tig pulled his head away with a cringe.

"Give him here." Gabby reached out for her son.

"No, no, we're good. You want me paying attention to just you huh buddy."

"Uncle Tiggy." Mathew answered more enthusiastically and tugged again at Tig's goatee.

"There's a reason on one in Fresno has facial hair." Gabby laughed.

Tig rolled his eyes and gave Mathew his sunglasses to play with instead of his facial hair.

Gabby looked behind her to make sure the other kids were being brought inside and saw Tom Tom staring intently at V-Lin. She was sure he wasn't hearing a word between Jax and Casper next to him. Suzie was tracing the tattoos on V-Lin's arm asking him to tell her what they said. They were written in Chinese and the little girl seemed fascinated by them. V-Lin was laughing as he told her what they said. Though when Gabby heard him answer 'dog' to one she knew he was lying to keep his answers child appropriate.

Tom Tom walked toward V-Lin without a word and lifted Suzie out of his arms, carrying her himself. "Let's give V-Lin a rest, he just got here. We should go find your mom."

"Mommy said to stay out of the clubhouse." Suzie answered him, content to be in Tom Tom's arms just as she was in V-Lin's.

"You can if you stay with me." Tom Tom assured her and juggled her onto his hip as he pushed his way through the crowd.

"…Gabby" Tig called her name for the third time and finally bumped her arm to get her attention. When she finally turned to him he looked her over. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah…yeah, sorry, what?" She answered and glanced in the direction Tom Tom had walked once again.

"I said I'm gonna take him inside."

"Okay. Just get me if he gets in the way." She offered resting her hand on Tig's shoulder for a moment.

Tig nodded and walked towards the clubhouse, chatting away with Mathew assuring him he couldn't possibly get in the way.

Casper wrapped an arm around Gabby's shoulders and walked her inside. He bent down and whispered when they were out of ear shot of the others. "Tom Tom just carried Suzie inside."

"I know." Gabby answered.

"I don't think Tom Tom's ever picked Suzie up…" He went on.

"I know…" Gabby repeated herself.

Jax, now carrying Kristen, caught up with the couple and walked into the clubhouse with them. "What am I missing?" He leaned over and asked with a chuckle.

"Mommy, Tom Tom took Suzie inside." Kristen added to the conversation. Obviously it was unusual if even a 6 year old noticed it.

"I know sweetie." Gabby repeated once more.

Kristen squirmed out of Jax's arms and ran ahead of the group through the club house weaving in and out of men's legs. By the time the adults got through the barrage of men clustered at the entrance Kristen was in Happy's arms.

Gabby distinctly remembered her children learning to walk. She wondered if these bikers realized if they kept carrying the kids around everywhere they will continue to expect it, well beyond the age and size they are now.

She shook her head and looked around. There was nowhere to sit, not that Gabby was delusional to even try. A sweet butt came around and offered beers to the men as they greeted more of the brothers already inside. Jax gave Hap a hard pat on the back when he saw the fresh white sergeants patch on his chest.

Hap leaned over between Gabby and Jax. "Tom Tom has Suzie." He said, heavily concerned.

"I know…" Gabby answered, nodding her head. Jax looked between the two and then at Tom Tom awkwardly opening a juice box one handed and giving it to Suzie.

"Why is that a problem?" He finally asked.

Before Jax got his answer Becky came over from the direction Vivica was in. "Gabby…Tom Tom has my child." She sounded half panicked.

"I know…we know…" Gabby waved her hand towards Caser Happy and Jax.

Jax shook his head and stomped over to Tom Tom and took Suzie.

"What…" Tom Tom started to ask.

"You're scarring people." Jax answered and carried Suzie back with him.

"You okay baby?" Becky asked, not that she didn't trust Tom Tom with her child, she just wasn't used to the idea of it, Suzie however was oblivious to the worry, drinking her juice box.

"Yes mommy." She answered and turned her whole body in Jax's arms looking for V-Lin. "Mommy V-Lin has Chinese words written on him." Jax laughed as V-Lin came over at the sound of his name and Suzie reached out for him.

"Looks like you have an admirer." Jax laughed as he handed the young girl over.

Gabby smiled as V-Lin tried to teach Suzie how to say a few words in Chinese. Becky was smiling too. Casper leaned an elbow on Gabby's shoulder and watched Tom Tom at the bar. The man was staring right at Becky, his eyes flicking to the Redwood man she was watching play with her kid every few seconds.

If it weren't a funeral they'd already be in the ring.

Gabby was sitting with Vivica when Tara and the boys finally made their way into the clubhouse. Tara greeted her husband first and he walked her and the boys into the chapel to pay their respects to Chris. Jax pointed towards Gabby before leaving Tara's side to go back to the group of officers from several charters in a corner.

Gabby and Vivica both stood and Tara hugged each of them in turn as did her boys. Gabby nodded her head and Tara directed the boys away from Vivica. The woman looked like she was taking everything in stride, but she was heavily sedated and wouldn't remember a second of this day tomorrow.

"You have no idea how old you make me feel." Gabby remarked resting a hand on Abel's head. He was nearly as tall as she was and he was only 15, 12 year old Thomas wasn't much shorter. Tara laughed and Abel grinned.

"Can I do anything to help?" Abel offered.

"Things are covered buddy, thanks. You can find your cousins if you want, give the guys a break." Gabby offered him a job. Abel nodded and tugged Thomas to come a long with him. The other kids had never made it back to the office, Kristen was coloring at a table with another young girl from Vegas, Suzie was still with V-Lin, they had at some point moved from Chinese lessons to a never ending game of tic tac toe. Mathew was sitting in Tig's lap repeatedly switching his rings from finger to finger.

Tara and Gabby sat on two recently vacated barstools and a sweet butt set beers in front of them automatically.

"Well trained." Tara snarked grabbing hers and taking a long pull. "How are things?"

"Alright, under control at least."

"Jax said they determined it was an accident." Gabby nodded her head and took a sip of her own beer. "All the worrying I do over Jax, I tend to push the everyday accidents to the very back…" Tara trailed off, her eyes searching the room for Jax, and then the rest of Charming. Checking on her boys, a good queen.

"You know, Tig talks about the kids nonstop." Tara added with a smile, watching Kristen present whatever she had just colored to the man with a smile. "Do they know?"

Gabby shook her head and sighed. She appreciated Tara's attempts at small talk but it just wasn't her thing. "They're too young to understand. And it would hurt Happy if they started asking questions. Tig's getting more than he deserves."

Tara nodded and patted Gabby's hand. "Looks like V-Lin found himself a friend for the night."

Gabby looked over to V-Lin. Becky had made her way over to him to check on Suzie and V-Lin was practically licking his lips checking out the young mother.

Becky was certainly attractive, sweet butt attractive, without the raunchy outfits. And she had a good heart and personality. No reason to think V-Lin didn't notice all of that. Plus Suzie seemed immediately taken by him, and he equally taken by Suzie. Gabby pushed the worry of losing her best friend to Charming out of her head, at least for today.

"We should start rounding up the kids, funeral procession starts in 20." Gabby realized and hopped off her stool. Tara followed suit and grabbed Gabby's elbow.

"I'll handle the kids, you stick with Vivica."

"Thanks Tara."

A mass of over a hundred bikes , headed by a hearse and a limo and followed by over a dozen cars and trucks wove there way through the streets of Fresno, a true sight to behold.

Chris had never been a religious man so a brother stepped up to speak at the grave. Vivica was flanked by Vicky and Gabby, each one subtly holding up the Fresno queen.

The men stood solemnly, even in the Fresno heat; sweat dripping down faces and backs, no one made a move to leave the grave site. Even the children stayed still and quiet, taking their cue from the adults. The quick, no frills service turned into over an hour of quiet, sometimes completely silent, reverence for the fallen President. Gabby couldn't imagine what would have happened if Chris had been shot down. How many more brothers would have made the trip, how many more brothers would she be surrounded by?

Gabby and Vicky stayed by Vivica's side as men again lined up to show respect and support at the limo. A few Charters were leaving directly from the cemetery. Vicky seemed overwhelmed by the outpouring, Vivica was numb, and so Gabby received the men. One after the other, thanking them, wishing them safe travels, receiving kisses and hugs.

She also watched them all leave the old ladies and head straight to the Fresno patches, a respectable distance away, congratulating the new president. Lenard looked positively sick at the power he had inherited. Gabby couldn't help but wonder of the future of SAMFRES.

Gabby knew men had left. She was positive, she had said good bye to entire charters worth of men. But now she stood in an overcrowded clubhouse, and she was positive that there were more people here now than there had been this morning.

She once again had no idea where her kids were and she didn't care because her children would be fine, spoiled with attention. Their father was somewhere in this madness, so was their grandfather, and fuck it, at least a hundred uncles, not to mention a dozen old ladies and sweet butts. And this was still a funeral after all. No one was stripping or getting head. The music was quiet, drinks were being poured but no one was shit face drunk. Gabby had Carol at the bar; she herself was serving plates of food. Not the food she had thrown together yesterday, that was inhaled this morning. No, now she was serving whatever she could throw together from the pantry. Tara was making biker stew as she liked to call it, basically pouring all the different cans of chili and beans into one pot and adding hot sauce. At the rate Gabby was serving it, it had to be pretty good; she would have to remember that trick. Becky was bringing back empty dishes and keeping up with cleaning them so they could keep serving. Gabby finally understood Gemma's obsession with paper plates, but she still cringed at the wastefulness of it.

Vicky had finally taken Vivica home. Gabby was pretty sure the bikers hadn't noticed, Vicky had been pretty under the radar about it. Vivica had no interest in receiving more people, and the dorms would soon be full, nowhere to hide.

Jax Bobby and Chibs were in Church with Lenard Vin Frankie and Hap discussing Chris. What had happened, what could have happened, the change in regime, and any help the men might need to transition over smoothly. Fresno, while the closest charter to Charming had never been a huge pool of support. They had been patched over for one reason only, to control the Fresno drug trade. SOA had seized the opportunity when a large chunk of the Mayans here had been imprisoned. Fresno was the meth capital of the country. The club still didn't have complete ownership of the town and they had to fight new dealers off every day. It did nothing to stem the drug trade going north, and they didn't make enough revenue to financial support other endeavors, but control meant power. SOA had control over the meth capital, that held weight in their world.

In the clubhouse Shark directed Tig to a dorm he could put a sleeping Mathew down in temporarily. He also snagged V-Lin's attention. Suzie was inseparable from the Charming patch, and Shark didn't attempt to take her away from him, he simply nodded his head for the man to follow Tig. Though she wasn't asleep Shark knew her well, she would be as soon as her head hit the pillow.

Tom Tom followed them as well. He had been brooding all day and Shark had come to the same conclusion as Casper, shit was going to go down between V-Lin and Tom Tom. Shark wasn't sure who would win that fight, wasn't even sure who he wanted to win it. Shark wanted Becky to stay in Fresno, and that meant team Tom Tom, But he also wanted the best for Suzie, and that obviously meant V-Lin at this point.

Kristen walked over to Juice as soon as the others had left to put the younger kids down and crawled up into his lap. Juice snickered; he always got a kick out of Kristen being so forward around the patches.

"Uncle Juice?" She asked innocently.

"Yes pretty?"

"Can you tell me about my grandma?" Kristen asked matter of factly and Juice's snicker disappeared.

"Umm, what?" He stalled.

"My grandma, she used to live in Charming. She's dead like Uncle Chris."

"Umm, well...you should really ask your mom or your dad or grandpa about her." Juice deflected and started looking around the clubhouse in a panic for one of said people to pass Kristen off to.

"Daddy says not to ask mommy about her because it makes her sad." Kristen said quietly, head down. Juice took a deep breath. Virtually the only thing he knew about Emily Duncan was that she was a sweet butt and OD'd while SAMCRO had been in prison.

"Then you should ask your dad." Juice attempted.

"Daddy says grandma died before he met mommy. He doesn't know anything about her."

Juice tapped his heel on the ground. "Why don't you ask your grandpa? Cause…umm… grandmas and grandpas kinda go together." He regretted it the moment he said it, Happy was going to kill him.

"I don't want too." Kristen drifted off.

"Why not?" Juice couldn't help but ask even though he was kicking himself for not taking the chance to dodge that bullet.

"Uncle Chris is dead and Aunt Vivica keeps crying. I don't want to make grandpa cry." Kristen shifted on Juice's lap and began swinging her legs. Juice bit his lip to avoid the automatic scoff at the thought of Happy crying over a sweet butt. No, Gabby's mom, Kristen's grandma, fuck…

The chapel doors opened and Hap smiled at Kristen on his way to the bar. Chibs and Jax joined Juice on the couch and Juice debated telling them what the young girl had asked, luckily he didn't have to.

"Uncle Jax?"

"Yes darling?" Jax dipped his head to the side and waited for Kristen to ask her obvious question.

"Did you know my grandma?"

"Did I what?" Jax asked and looked at Juice for an explanation. Juice gave him a look indicating she had asked him as well.

"Did you know my grandma? She lived in Charming like you." Kristen apparently felt the need to remind him.

"Umm…yeah. Sort of." Honestly the last memory Jax had of Emily Duncan was having sex with her so she would in turn have sex with Skeeter so the club could dig up some dead bodies.

"What was she like?" Kristen asked and Jax saw the flaw of his previous answer.

"Umm…she was…you know Kristen, Uncle Chibs knew your grandma a lot better than I did." He threw Chibs under the bus and immediately got up off the couch and walked across the clubhouse. Kristen immediately climbed from Juice to Chibs' lap.

"You knew my grandma?"

"Aye lass, I…knew her."

"What was she like?"

"She was…nice. She umm…was ah, always…doing things…for other people…"

"Do I look like her?"

"You look like your mommy." He answered and tapped her on the nose.

"Does mommy look like her?"

Chibs blew out a breath and nearly leapt for joy when Jax and Happy walked back over to the couch.

Jax nodded at Chibs as Happy squatted down in front of Chibs and Kristen. Kristen suddenly had no questions to ask the men.

"Sweetie, uncle Jax said you have questions about your grandma. Why didn't you ask me?" Happy said and Juice was amazed by the non-scary tone of voice he used towards the little girl.

Kristen looked down at her hands, Hap got down lower, onto one knee, so Kristen had no choice but to look at him. "Kristen?"

"I didn't want to make you sad." Kristen mumbled. "Uncle Chris died, and I'm sad and I miss him and Aunt Vivica keeps crying. But grandma is dead and I'm not sad, but I didn't want to make you sad."

Happy sighed and Chibs swallowed an 'aww'. Happy stood up and grabbed Kristen, balancing her on his hip. "Your grandma died a long time ago. You never knew her. It's okay not to be sad. You won't be sad about Uncle Chris forever. Neither will Aunt Vivica."

"Mommy is still sad about grandma." Kristen mumbled into Happy's neck. Happy sighed and eyed Jax, the young president knew instantly what Happy wanted and walked away to find Casper while Hap carried Kristen out of the busy clubhouse into the office.

Happy sat down on the couch and settled Kristen in his lap, sideways so she could look at him. "Sweetie…your grandma and I weren't married like Vivica and Chris. We were like…Becky and Suzie's dad. We didn't live together; I just came over to visit."

"Suzie's dad doesn't come over to see her."

"No…no he doesn't. But I did. As much as I could. But my point is that if you have questions you can ask me, it won't make me sad." Happy stroked Kristen's curly hair.

"Daddy never met grandma." Kristen asked more than stated.

"No, grandma died when your mom was 18. She didn't know your dad yet."

"Did she have a funeral like this one?" Kristen played with the open flap of Happy's cut while she asked, not looking at him.

"No, she didn't. Your grandma wasn't buried like Uncle Chris was today. She was cremated and your mother and I spread her ashes in the ocean." Happy explained honestly.

"Cremated?" Kristen sounded out. Happy's heart stopped for a second at the prospect of explaining cremation to a 6 year old.

Luckily however at that point Casper walked into the office extremely concerned. "Sweetie?" He squatted down in front of Happy and Kristen slipped down to the floor, safely sounded by her father and grandfathers legs, boxing her in.

"Am I in trouble daddy?" Kristen asked and reached out to wrap her arms around his neck.

"No sweetie." He hugged his daughter till she pulled back and set his hands on her tiny waist. "You can ask me and grandpa all the questions you want and we will answer them, okay?"

Jax walked in, having been waiting in the doorway after bringing Casper over. "You can ask me too."

"Kristen?" Casper coaxed, shaking her playfully to get her attention.

"Why doesn't mommy ever talk about grandma? She talks about grandpa."

"Well, grandpa is around, grandma's not." Casper answered.

"No…she talks about her and grandpa. The things they did together. She doesn't talk about doing things with Grandma."

Casper let out a small sigh and Happy wiped a hand over his face before leaning forward and pulling Kristen's hair behind her ears. Both men seemed to be at a loss.

"Your grandma worked a lot. And she used to help my mom at the clubhouse…like Becky helps your mom." Jax kneeled down next to Casper; apparently he was more okay than the other two with lying.

"Your friend Suzie stays here with you and plays with you and all your uncles keep an eye on her. We did the same thing for your mom. She used to come to the clubhouse and sometimes she would go on trips with us." It wasn't a complete lie, it just stopped happening after JT died, when Gabby was one.

Happy couldn't help but glare at Jax. Suzie was treated as good as Kristen and Mathew. She had Fresno wrapped around her finger just as his own grandkids did. Charming hadn't treated Gabby a tenth as good. They should have, Gabby was blood, her life should have been what Jax described. She should have had what Suzie did.

"What did she look like?" Kristen asked after a pause, Jax assumed relating Emily to someone Kristen knew well had quelled her questions.

"Well…you've seen pictures of her." Jax started. Both Happy and Casper turned to him and shook their heads. Jax looked confused. "Haven't you?" Kristen shook her head.

"Oh… well… I bet I can find you some. Would you like that?" Kristen emphatically nodded her head and Jax smiled at her and stood up.

"You have any more questions sweetie?" Casper asked.

Kristen seemed to think for a moment. "How did she die?"

All 3 men exchanged glances and finally Happy turned Kristen around to face him. "Your mom came home one day…and found her. She was already dead." He waited a beat to see if that was enough.

Kristen looked at Happy and then turned back to her father. "Is that why mommy gets sad when she talks about grandma? Because she found her?"

"Yeah sweetie. It was a really scary thing." Kristen nodded her head in agreement and hugged her father again, burying her head in his neck and sniffling. Casper let out a breath and kissed her head. "That won't happen to mommy. You won't find her dead sweetie. You don't have to be afraid of that."

Kristen pulled away and wiped her eyes and nodded her head. "Do you have more questions?" Kristen thought for a moment and then shook her head. "Okay. You ready to go home? Go to bed?" Kristen nodded her head and instantly wrapped her arms around her father's neck to be carried.

"I want to say goodnight to mommy." She mumbled into his neck once he stood up.

"Okay sweetie." He rubbed her back and Happy opened the office door for them to leave.

"Hap." Jax grabbed his arm to stop him from following. Happy stared at him, feeling no need to offer a 'what' or 'yes'.

Jax tried not to roll his eyes at the man's silence. "Gabby doesn't have any pictures of her mother? None?"

"No." He took a deep breath. "She burned them. Before I got out of prison. Every last one."

Okay, this chapter got a whole lot longer for I meant it to pretty quick so the funeral will take one more chapter to wrap up. Next week, Tom Tom V-Lin goodness :D

Keep the Kudos coming, and look out for a Lion Heart one shot coming out in the next few days for those of you that don't have alerts up for that one. I knew there was a reason i didn't mark it complete!