A/N: I'M SO SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN FOREVER!
Life got real for a while with school, graduation, and job hunting that I didn't have much time to come back to my stories. I'm also working on my own novel, but that is also a slow and time-consuming pass time.
Without further ado, here's the next installment! I hope you enjoy, and the chapter makes the wait a little less maddening (I'm really sorry!).
Rin hadn't realized how late it had gotten until the museum janitor came knocking on the office door. She glanced up from the book she was examining to see the man walk in with a friendly wave. He pulled his cart of trash cans in behind him as he approached her.
"Good evening, little lady," he greeted with a smile, "doing some late night studying?" he asked curiously before he faltered slightly when he noticed Sesshomaru sitting at his desk. The professor bent forward the newspaper that had shielded him from view to get a good look at the man.
"Ah, good evening Dr. Taisho," the janitor laughed uneasily, "I didn't see you there,"
"Good evening, Shin" Sesshomaru answered civilly, however the janitor still couldn't help but shudder under his unnerving gaze. He didn't know Sesshomaru well, but he always had a bad feeling when it came to the man. Something about him was off, and he didn't like it. What surprised him was the sight of a student in his office at such a late hour.
"Did you get yourself a new TA, Dr. Taisho?" Shin asked as he watched Rin suddenly get up to put the book she was looking at on the shelf. Sesshomaru considered his question for a moment before his eyes slid to Rin. The professor remained silent as he studied his student. Shin started to feel a little uneasy in the silence until Sesshomaru finally spoke,
"Yes, she is,"
"That's great! It's about time you got some help around here," Shin answered heartily, "You're a brilliant man, but you've got a lot to take care of in this museum on your own," he added. Sesshomaru merely nodded in reply before he looked away and seemed to suddenly find something very interesting on his desk.
"I'm sure it's nice to have someone else to talk to in this crypt, too," Shin continued as he gazed back at Rin who had started sorting through more stacks of loose books on a nearby table, "Bet it gets lonely sometimes in here all by yourself at night. Having a student around helps the hours go by faster. Doesn't hurt that she's pretty, too. Am I right?" he asked with a chuckle before he walked closer to Rin, who stiffened at his approach. But Shin was blissfully unaware of her uneasy. He was so caught up in the fact that the biggest antisocial professor on campus had actually taken on an assistant.
"What year in school are you?" he asked curiously, "Did you just come to campus? I think I would have remembered a pretty face like yours if you were here long," he added, and thought he sounded charming, but paused when he saw Rin start to back herself up against the wall. She kept her eyes downcast as she grabbed her arm defensively, her cheeks flushed from his sudden attention.
"You're a shy one, eh?" Shin concluded with a sympathetic smile, "That's fine. It's fitting actually. If you talked too much, you'd probably get on the professor's nerves," he added with a snort.
"You're getting paid to work, not to socialize," Sesshomaru pointed out icily, and Shin froze when he realized that the professor only stood a few feet away from him. Shin hadn't even heard the man get out of his chair.
"Yes, Sir!" Shin quickly yelped with a hard salute as he rushed to collect the trash cans in the room and empty them into his trash bin. Shin was so worried about upsetting Sesshomaru any further that he didn't notice the pair share a glance as he worked. He also didn't see Rin bring up her hand, signaling to her professor that she was alright. Shin made quick work of the trash in the room before he wheeled his cart out of the office. Before he left, he glanced at Rin and said,
"Well, it was nice meeting you. I'm glad the professor is in such good hands," Rin's lips quivered up into somewhat of a smile as she looked up at him thankfully. Shin was slightly surprised how expressive her large eyes were, but was glad that she looked happier than she had earlier.
He was used to reaching out to students and teachers alike. Her rather fearful response to his friendly makes at conversation made him feel like she didn't like him. But her warmer expression spoke otherwise. Perhaps she really was just a shy girl who took some time to warm up to others. He couldn't hold her actions against her for that.
He happily waved goodbye to her and Sesshomaru as he left. Sesshomaru merely ignored him, but Rin gave him a little wave in return. She wasn't much of a talker, but Shin could already feel the effect her presence had on Sesshomaru's office. He dreaded having to come to the professor's office at night, simply because the man was intimidating.
Shin always thought Sesshomaru acted the way he did on purpose to keep others away. However, the fact that he would suddenly take on a student spoke otherwise. His new TA seemed sweet, despite her reclusive manner. He reveled in how much more approachable the office suddenly seemed with her in it.
Shin would go on idly wondering what about the girl had sparked Sesshomaru's interest for the rest of his shift.
Rin let out a soft sigh of relief after Shin left. She instantly regretted getting defensive when he tried to make friendly conversation with her. He seemed like a nice man. However, he had gotten too close to her and his questions put too many demands on her to speak. She froze up, like usual.
Only this time she had felt more than just a fear of speaking well up inside of her. Her mind had been blinded with thoughts of escape while her eyes only saw Kasai walking towards her. It had scared her so badly that she couldn't even look at Shin when he came close to her.
It wasn't until she heard Sesshomaru's voice that she was freed from the illusion. Suddenly, Kasai was gone and a worried stranger took his place. Rin was so ashamed that she had let Kasai get to her that she couldn't move from where she was against the wall. The worry she saw in Sesshomaru's eyes and stance had enabled her to weakly wave off his concern.
She glanced up from the pile of books Sesshomaru had her sort to eye him discretely. She was touched that her professor had rushed to her aid, again. They had gone through a frightening experience together, and it made her feel a little bit closer to him. They knew something about each other that no one else did. She smiled at the comfort that the knowledge brought her.
She had wanted to go straight back to her apartment after the incident with Kasai, but Sesshomaru had offered her his office and his company for as long as she wanted it. She had happily accepted that offer with a quick nod of thanks.
While it would have been nice to go home, shower and sleep, she admitted that she needed the distraction. She also didn't want to put Kagome in any danger if Kasai happened to follow her home. As far as Rin knew, Kasai was only interested in her. But she didn't want to wager her friend's life on that assumption. Or underestimate what Kasai was capable of.
"Can you carry all those books?" Sesshomaru's monotone voice snapped Rin out of her inner monologue, only to find that she had been carelessly stacking books in her arms while she was lost in thought. She wobbled slightly as she tried to balance the ten books that she swore were as light as a feather a moment ago.
She realized half a second too late that the books were centuries old, which meant that they all had weak bindings. She let out a light squeak as the books at the very top of the stack leaned too far forward, and the rest of the books tumbled down after them. She was able to hold onto two books successfully, but the rest laid sprawled on the ground.
A sea of pages flew up into the air before they slowly glided to the ground. There had to be close to fifty pages that went flying. Rin put the two books she had salvaged on the table delicately before she knelt on the ground to inspect the scattered pages.
Based on the different writing styles and pictures, Rin guessed that all the pages weren't just from one book. Which meant she'd have to examine each page individually and match it to the right book. But the longer she looked at the pages, the more she realized that she was officially screwed. Not only did the pages cover artifacts and history she never heard of, but some of the pages were in different languages as well.
She studied an assortment of languages in high school, but she was by no means fluent. As she continued to panic over how badly she had just messed up, she didn't hear Sesshomaru get out of his chair and approach her.
"Leave it," he told her when he stood only a few feet away, and Rin glanced up at him with guilty eyes before she feverishly shook her head. Tears pricked the sides of her eyes as she studied the page in her hand, begging the foreign words to make sense to her. She was the one who made the mess, so it was her responsibility to fix it. She wasn't going to let Sesshomaru down.
She gazed at the writing for a moment more before she glanced at the book titles on the ground and searched for matching letters. When she found one that looked like it matched, she gingerly opened it and flipped through the pages to find its rightful place. Although the page was written in a language she didn't recognize, she was grateful that the page at least had a page number. At least that part was easy to figure out.
Feeling proud of herself for that small victory, Rin glanced at the next loose page closely. It was in a different language than the first, but she recognized the picture in the middle of the page. It was a diagram of a Mayan temple dissected into its various parts. Although she couldn't read the writing around the picture, she figured it was describing the purpose of each part of the temple.
She remembered studying the book that the page belonged to when Shin had been leaving the office, and quickly looked for it among the mess around her. She recognized the book easily before she found the page's place within it.
She moved to reach for another loose sheet when her hand collided with Sesshomaru's, and she gave a start at the sudden contact. While she had been so focused on her task, she hadn't noticed that Sesshomaru had knelt on the ground to join her. He held four sheets of loose paper in his hand delicately, and had reached for a fifth when their hands met.
Rin glanced at him in confusion as she felt her cheeks flush. She didn't understand why he wanted to help her when she was the one who made the mess. Not to mention, she probably permanently damaged the books that were meant to be new editions to the museum's collection. She had expected Sesshomaru to yell at her and send her out the door for her carelessness. What he said next surprised her.
"You don't need to worry about this," he told her flatly, "Just pick up all the papers and books and put them on the table. I'll take care of the rest," he added as he set the pages he had on the table. Although Rin was glad Sesshomaru didn't seem angry with her, she couldn't help but feel troublesome. She hated feeling like a burden to anyone. She could take care of herself.
She also felt that she should get some form of punishment for what she did. She was careless when she shouldn't have been. There had to be a consequence to her actions. It only seemed fair that she should leave. What would her professor want with a klutz of a student who only caused more trouble than good anyway? She picked up the loose pages and piled them on the table before she stacked the books next to them. When she was finished she quickly bowed to Sesshomaru before she made her way to the door.
She wrung her hands together to stop them from shaking.
"Where are you going?" Sesshomaru suddenly asked, and sounded a bit annoyed. Rin flinched at the negative emotion she heard in his voice before she looked back at him uncertainly. Shouldn't I go? She wanted to say, but as always, her throat closed off her attempt to speak and she was forced to look at the ground dejectedly.
"This is nothing," he stated flatly, "at least you didn't burn the building down. It's happened before," Rin's eyes grew to the size of saucers at his words before she choked on what he said next,
"I did it," he confessed, as if he were confessing to taking an extra free sample at the supermarket. He then kept talking, probably because he enjoyed the look of the shock on Rin's face, "One of the prized donations the museum received ended up being a fake. It happens a lot, but this donation was supposed to bring in a lot of business. Unfortunately, I let my temper get the better of me and burned it out of spite. I didn't realize the contents inside it were extremely flammable until after the building burned to the ground,"
Rin openly gaped at him, and for once was thankful that she was mute. She had no idea what to say to Sesshomaru's confession. The professor smirked slightly at her expression before he gestured to the books she had placed on the table and said,
"Like I said, this is nothing. You won't get punished for it, and you don't have to leave," Rin blinked back the tears that were threatening to fall as a sense of relief washed over her. It was so powerful that her body gave out slightly and she staggered before she righted herself. She was also thankful that he had shared such an embarrassing story of his past with her. She was sure he had done it to try to assure her that she hadn't messed up as badly as she thought.
Sesshomaru eyed her odd movements with an eyebrow raised before he grabbed the chair she had been sitting in and sat down. He then grabbed for the first loose page in the stack before he looked through the pile of books for its match. Rin stood by the doorway awkwardly and watched him pair the first few pages before she made her way over to him, but he stopped her before she made it to the table.
"I don't need any help," he informed her calmly, "go sit down and rest. You can sleep if you want to, you deserve it," he added. He left the words unsaid, but Rin knew he meant that she deserved to sleep after what happened earlier with Kasai. He also seemed to notice that she needed to sleep off what happened, and cared enough to offer her a break. She was grateful for the sentiment, but wanted to help him as well. She continued walking towards him, but paused when Sesshomaru shot her an impatient glance.
She immediately shrunk away, not wanting to upset her professor any further. The fact that he had been so calm and collected through all of what happened earlier was amazing to Rin. She reluctantly stepped away from the table to look for somewhere to sit. Unfortunately, it seemed that Sesshomaru only had two chairs in his office, and he was sitting in one of them. The only other option Rin had was to sit in his chair by his desk.
It was certainly more comfortable than the chair Sesshomaru was sitting in, but Rin felt like she was breaching some unspoken professor-student law. It was his chair after all. She always pictured him sitting there, almost like it was a place of stature and power. But he hadn't given her much of a choice.
Rin tried to ignore her badgering thoughts as she sat down in his leather chair. Sesshomaru seemed to fit into it like a glove, but Rin felt like she was swallowed up by it. She had to stretch her arms out wide to rest them on the armrests, and the backs of her knees hit the edge of the chair when she pressed up against the back of it. Even though she felt like an eight year old in the chair, she had to admit that it was comfortable.
She rested the back of her head against the back of the chair as her body relaxed. It felt nice to be able to let her guard down, and finally feel safe. She caught sight of Sesshomaru's golden gaze watching her as her eyelids started to grow heavy. She wondered why he was being so nice to her, and wasn't aware that the demon was wondering the exact same thing.
She didn't get to dwell on the thought for long before her eyelids closed defiantly and she fell fast asleep.
Sesshomaru glanced up from the paper in his hand to spot his student sleeping soundly in his chair. Her petite frame looked even smaller within it that he was certain she could comfortably huddle herself into a ball and still have room to spare. He set the page down on the table as he studied her further.
He noticed that she looked more her age while she was asleep. The worry lines across her forehead were nowhere to be seen, and her plump lips were relaxed rather than set into a permanent frown. She possessed a child-like innocence while she slept that he thought suited her better than the fearful and untrusting expression she usually wore while she was awake. Sesshomaru felt like he was seeing a vulnerable side of Rin that many people didn't get the chance to see.
Rin turned her body in the chair as she tried to make herself more comfortable before she tilted her head slightly. The glasses perched on her nose began to slide forward from her movements, and he came to her side just to time to catch them before they fell. He glanced at them for a moment, reveling in the fact that her shield had finally fallen.
She had used them so often to hide behind, that she looked almost like another person without them. Unable to stop his curiosity, Sesshomaru held the glasses up to the ceiling and tried to look through them to see just how blind Rin was. He was surprised when he didn't notice a difference looking through her lenses. Either they were fake glasses or she had a very light prescription. Sesshomaru didn't doubt his own eyesight, because he knew it was impeccable and far more advanced than a human's.
He sided with his first theory, but wondered why she would wear fake glasses. He knew some humans found it fashionable to wear glasses, but Sesshomaru doubted that was the reason why Rin wore hers.
She didn't strike him as someone who would focus on following fashionable trends. Not that what she wore wasn't acceptable, but she wasn't nearly as decorated as other students he had in his classes. Sesshomaru admitted that he preferred her simpler attire to the extravagant styles of her fellow female classmates.
Rin softly murmured something unintelligible in her sleep before she brought her legs to her chest and laid on her side in his chair. He doubted she was as comfortable as she looked, based on the odd angle she had her neck craned. He debated on waking her up and walking her home, but decided against it. She looked so drained from the day that he was glad she had fallen asleep.
Her eyes began to move underneath her eyelids as she dreamed, and she looked so fragile and small. She shivered slightly and wrapped her arms around herself before she relaxed again. Sesshomaru figured she must be cold, unable to confirm it himself. He hadn't felt cold in centuries.
He placed her glasses on his desk before he headed for the door. He paused slightly as he scanned the building for any stragglers. He picked up the faint aura and scent of Shin still making his rounds, but no one else. Content that Rin was safe on her own for a few minutes, Sesshomaru left his office.
He intended to make his way up to the attic of the museum that also served as his temporary apartment when he worked late and didn't feel like heading to his house. It wasn't anything extravagant, but it served its purpose. He had a couple of blankets some of the staff had gifted him with when they found out he was sleeping up there. He never used them himself, but he figured Rin could use one to keep warm.
He made his way up the staircase and opened the gate that blocked off the general public from the attic. When he walked into the apartment, he was pleased to find that everything was still in order. He always locked the gate on his way out in the morning, but never trusted that the gate was enough to keep everyone out.
The apartment wasn't overly decorated, but it held the essentials. A leather couch was pressed up against the nearest wall to the door, across from a flat screen mounted on the opposite wall. Under the television was a small glass coffee table with neatly staked piles of DVDs. Past the entrance room was a kitchen set complete with stainless steel appliances. Sesshomaru had it installed to prevent the staff from asking any questions if he stayed up there for days at a time.
A bathroom was just past the kitchen, and finally the bedroom. Sesshomaru also kept the bare necessities within the room. A king sized bed with twin dark wood nightstands on either side were all the furniture in the room. A closet against the nearest wall had a few extra outfits Sesshomaru might need if he stayed the night. He also kept all his gift items, including the blankets, folded neatly on the floor of the closet.
He opened the closet before quickly picking up the blanket he had come for before he left the apartment, locking the gate on his way down the stairs. He didn't pick up the aura or scent of anyone besides Shin and Rin, and was relieved to find Rin in the same position he had left her in when he returned to the office.
Her arms were still wrapped protectively around herself, and Sesshomaru approached her before unfolding the blanket and gently lying it atop her. She didn't immediately react, but he saw her slowly relax before her arms fell away from her body. He still didn't like the position she was in, but figured he'd finish organizing the books and let her sleep a little longer first. If she still hadn't awakened, he'd wake her up and walk her home himself.
He left Rin's side and returned to the table to finish putting together the disheveled books. He began reading through the text of the first document before he matched it to the right book. One of the benefits of a long life span was that it gave him time to become fluent in multiple languages. Not only had he learned the language from books, but he had also visited the countries and spoke the language to become fluent in the culture as well. He was by no means a fan of the Human race as a whole, but he had to admit that their history was fascinating.
He continued to pair the loose pages as his thoughts began to drift. While the task itself was tedious, he had meant it when he told Rin it wasn't something she needed to worry about. Frankly, the books themselves were worth more for the information they contained, not by the way they looked. He had also noticed her tendency to block out the world around her earlier that day. The only reason he pointed out that she was stacking so many books in her arms was because he thought she'd try to lift the table next.
He didn't fault her for losing track of her surroundings, especially after her near death experience. Her ability to fall asleep so quickly was evident enough of her exhaustion. It pained him that her life only seemed to get more complicated by the day, and thus furthering her desire to disappear from it. He had hoped reaching out to her would have helped her reveal more of herself to him, but it ended up having the opposite effect. Instead, he only subjected her to more danger and fear.
It bothered him that he cared so much for Rin's well-being. Even his thoughts of her were more intimate than they had been before. She had always been the interesting human, and he referred to her as such in his mind. Now he rarely called her his interesting human, and used her name instead.
He mused over the new development until he finished the task, and all the books were in order. He walked each one to their designated shelf before he heard a soft sigh and the squeak of his desk chair. He turned back around in time to see Rin sit up and stretch her body with a small yawn. She rubbed her eyes tiredly before she glanced curiously at the blanket that pooled at her waist.
Her cinnamon eyes found his golden gaze before her cheeks flushed. She timidly picked up the blanket and held it up before she gave him a thankful smile. He nodded in return before he glanced at the clock, and was surprised to see that it was just past midnight. He hadn't realized that so much time had passed, and felt that it was far too late to walk her back. He also didn't like the idea of leaving her alone with Kasai still on the loose.
"Feel better?" he asked as his eyes found Rin's again, and the girl nodded. She collected the blanket in her arms before she stood from his chair and walked to his side. She presented the blanket to him, but he waved her off before he said,
"You'll want to keep it. It gets cold in here overnight," she didn't have to speak her question, her uncertain facial expression was enough. Overnight? He imagined she'd say from the quirk of her eyebrows and slightly unsure pursing of her lips.
"I'm not letting you out of my sight while Kasai is still out there," he stated sternly, "there's a spare room I use from time to time in the attic of this building. You can sleep there for tonight," he added, and didn't leave any room for objections. Not that Rin would give him any, voiced at least.
But where will you sleep? He read from her next facial expression as she looked around the room in confusion.
"I don't need to sleep," he informed her, figuring she was already aware that he wasn't human, "I can stay on the couch that's next to the bedroom. From there I can be close enough to protect you if needed, and still keep things professional between us," he added. He didn't know if Rin had any fear of him trying to take advantage of her, but he figured it was best to put any doubts to rest in her mind.
He may find her attractive, but she was still human. He wouldn't soil his demonic heritage for a roll in the sack with a human woman, much less force it on her.
Rin surveyed him for a moment before she hesitantly agreed with the nod of her head.
"Follow me," he instructed before he turned and made his way out of the office with Rin following close behind. They were silent as they climbed the stairs and reached the gate that lead to the final staircase. Sesshomaru quickly unlocked it before he let Rin walk a head of him so that he could lock it behind them. He no longer sensed Shin's presence, and knew that the janitor always locked the main doors on his way out every night.
Rin waited for him at the head of the stairs, and walked in after he opened the apartment door for her. He watched in slight amusement as her eyes grew to the size of saucers when she stepped inside. He never thought twice about how the apartment looked, but it seemed to be pretty impressive by Rin's standards.
"The bedroom is this way," he told her as he began to walk towards the back of the apartment, only to turn back around when he noticed she wasn't following him. He quirked an eyebrow at her hesitation before he noticed that her face at gone completely red. She jumped slightly when she noticed his eyes on her and shuffled hurriedly after him.
He didn't ask what had embarrassed her, figuring it was the idea of being in such a private place with her professor. He admitted that it did feel more intimate than he thought it would back at his office. They were treading on thin ice as far as the typical professor-student relationship was concerned with this arrangement. If anyone were to find out, he was sure his job and Rin's education at the University could be put in jeopardy.
He pushed the thought to the back of his mind as he opened the bedroom door. He held it open for Rin as she timidly walked inside and glanced around the room curiously. "I have some spare clothes in the closet if you want to use them to sleep in and some food in the fridge if you get hungry. Feel free to help yourself," he stated, and Rin blushed again before she nodded with a thankful look in her eyes.
"I'll be right outside on the couch if you need anything," he added before he gently closed the door to offer her some privacy. Then he walked back into the main room and sat on the couch with a slight huff. He didn't really need the sleep, but he figured he could at least rest his eyes to pass the time. He could kept his other senses on alert in case anyone tried to break in.
He wasn't sure how long he had his eyes closed, but he found his thoughts drifting back to Rin in the other room. He hoped she took his offer to heart, and would get whatever she needed without fear of imposing on him. He didn't want her shutting herself in his room when she really was hungry or thirsty. She had been in his office for a while, and he hadn't seen her eat or drink anything since class that afternoon.
He growled softly to himself when he realized he was doing it again. He was caring about Rin like she mattered to him. She was his student. A student who was going through troubled times and who had a troubled past. He was sure there were hundreds of humans just like her. So, why was she so special? Why was he so willing to come to her aid, like a trained guard dog?
A loud thump like something falling on the ground suddenly resounded from Sesshomaru's bedroom, and his eyes instantly shot open in surprise. He was on his feet and at the bedroom door in a flash. He brought his hand up as if to knock, but quickly changed his mind and grabbed the doorknob instead. If someone had gotten in without him noticing, he couldn't waste any time with formalities. He tried to sense any foreign presence within the room as he flung the door open.
He instantly regretted not knocking first.
Rin stared up at him from the rugged floor, wearing one of his pajama shirts. It was almost laughably big on her, fitting her more like a dress than a shirt. The navy blue was a sharp contrast to her pale skin that looked even paler than usual.
She seemed to have been in the middle of buttoning the front, but had given up midway through. The dipping V neck the opening created stopped just above her belly button on her petite frame. It covered what needed to be covered, but didn't leave much to the imagination. She also had decided that she wasn't going to wear a bra with it, either. The part of her front that was visible was all skin. He didn't see any sign that she was wearing anything under his shirt.
Her legs were tangled with the matching pair of blue bottoms, which he assumed was the culprit behind the thud he had heard. She must have tried to put them on, and wound up tripping and falling instead. His shirt was long enough to cover her lower half up to her mid-thigh. However, he was slightly bothered that the sight of her naked legs stirred something inside him. The sight of her wearing his clothes, mixing his scent with hers, was intoxicating.
"I thought you might have gotten attacked," he stated, and inwardly cursed when he heard how husky his voice sounded. He knew this was bad. He had to shut the door and leave her alone. He hadn't even thought offering her his clothes would be this dangerous.
Rin studied him for a moment before she nodded and moved to stand. Unfortunately, that only gave him a better view of what lied underneath his loosely buttoned shirt that she wore. Suddenly, he felt like a hypocrite when the sight of her excited him almost immediately, even though she was human. Her body was much curvier than he expected, not that he minded. He grimaced after the thought, angered at himself for thinking like a sex crazed teenager. He was known for his self-control, so where was it now?
She was also his student. They were already pushing the boundaries of what was considered a professional relationship. If anything did happen between them, there would be no salvaging their reputations as professor or student.
Rin watched him shyly, seemingly oblivious to his inner turmoil. Her innocence helped calm the raging desire within him, and brought him back to his senses. Rin was in his apartment because she had been attacked by a classmate. She was mute because something else traumatic happened in her past. She was surrounded by people who took advantage of her. He was not going to be one of those people.
He cleared his throat as politely as he could before he pretended to adjust the buttons on his shirt. Rin looked back at him in confusion before she glanced down at her own body and jumped slightly in alarm. Her hands instantly grabbed the shirt she wore and she covered herself up. Her face had gone completely pale and her fingers shook as she feverishly tried to button the rest of his shirt.
He had expected her to get embarrassed by her mistake, not fearful. His golden gaze narrowed slightly as he watched her frantic and clumsy movements. Her dark eyes had glazed over, and he realized she wasn't in the room with him anymore. She was somewhere else, somewhere she didn't want to be.
"Rin?" he called to her softly, and waited for a response. He wasn't surprised when he didn't get one. He stepped closer to her and rested a hand on her shoulder, hoping to bring her back to the present. Her body jerked under his touch before she started shivering, and then shaking. Her eyes remained clouded as her breathing turned ragged and she started hyperventilating.
"Rin, snap out of it," Sesshomaru ordered, his voice sounding far harsher then he intended. He grabbed her other shoulder as he forced her to stand still, but it only seemed to intensify whatever nightmare she was experiencing. Her hands tried to knock his away as her nails dug into his shoulders, his chest and his arms as she fought against him violently.
What she did next surprised him even further.
A heart-wrenching scream suddenly filled his apartment and rang almost painfully in his ears. It was soon followed by another, and then another. He didn't register what was happening at first, so used to her silence, but then he realized Rin was the one screaming.
Her voice sounded hoarse from limited use, but the screams grew crisper and louder as she continued. His hold on her shoulder tightened as he tried to shake her out of her hysteria, but she only clawed at him more in her fury to get away.
"I DON'T WANT THIS!" she screamed, the sudden sound of her voice both beautiful and disconcerting at the same time, "IT HURTS! STOP! Oh, god PLEASE! STOP! Just...STOP!" she wailed uncontrollably, the volume of her voice varying as her pained sobs threatened to suffocate her and tears streamed down her face.
Sesshomaru let go of her shoulders before he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her up against him. Her actions grew even more feverish as she continued to scream and sob against him, fighting an invisible adversary. He ignored her punches, kicks and scratches as he held her. As a human, she couldn't deal any real damage to his body. Although, she would likely leave marks on his human form.
Her nails mercilessly dug into his skin and even drew blood, but Sesshomaru let her continue her rampage. He didn't know what had triggered her flashback, but he wasn't going to let her ride it out alone. He was going to be there when she returned to herself.
He wasn't going to let this human girl find another reason to shut him out.
As time passed her fighting began to slow and her screams died out. Her voice wavered as she continued to beg her attacker to stop against Sesshomaru's chest until it eventually turned into hushed whispers among her sobs. Eventually she stopped moving altogether, and just rested against him.
He thought she might have fallen asleep, until she lifted up her head to look at him in confusion. The light had returned to her eyes. She was back. He also guessed that she had no memory of what happened based on her clueless expression.
"Are you alright?" he asked, albeit rather hesitantly. Rin looked even more confused than before, which forced him to continue,
"You were screaming at someone or something, and then thought I was whatever was attacking you," Rin's eyes widened before she tried to pull out of his embrace, but he refused to let her go that easily and only tightened his grip.
"You spoke, asking someone to stop and saying that it hurt and you didn't want it," he described, and felt Rin begin to shake against him as fresh tears streamed down her cheeks. She then began to mouth "I'm sorry" over and over again silently as she gave up fighting and pressed her body closer to him instead.
"You have nothing to apologize for," he told her calmly, sickened by whoever had left such a dark memory on Rin's past.
"Sessh...sorry...so...Sessh..." he heard Rin murmur against his chest. Her voice faded in and out as she spoke, quivering and hoarse from all of her screaming. Sesshomaru pulled away slightly before he lifted her chin with his finger. She continued repeating her apology to him even as he brought his other hand up to gently wipe away her tears.
"Don't make me repeat myself," he commanded. Rin bit her lip to stop her voice and nodded before she leaned into the hand he held against her cheek, struggling to control her sobs.
"You're safe," he said it more as a statement than an assurance, but Rin smiled before she gazed up at him graciously.
"Thank you," she said, and Sesshomaru was taken aback by how beautiful she sounded. Her voice was no longer tangled with the anguish he had heard before, and it sounded like the chiming of bells. Rin then pulled her cheek away from his hand before she threw her arms around his waist and pressed herself up against him in a tight hug. It took Sesshomaru a few seconds to respond to her sudden action, but then he rested his hand against the back of her head while his other arm came around her shoulders as he returned her hug.
"Only Kagome has seen me like that," Rin confessed before she buried her face deeper into Sesshomaru's chest, "It's a side of myself I wish no one had to see,"
"Burying it and hoping it goes away isn't going to help you," Sesshomaru replied, "you're letting the emotion fester within you, and giving power to the one that did it to you," he felt Rin stiffen against him at his words before her body relaxed.
"You're right," she agreed solemnly as her voice cracked, "but it's all I know how to do,"
"Change is never easy," Sesshomaru answered, "you may fail many times before you succeed. But it's better to try for success than accept defeat. If you accept things as they are now, then you will automatically fail, because you didn't try to change it,"
Rin remained silent against him, and Sesshomaru wondered if she had gone back to being mute before she finally spoke again,
"I'll try," she promised softly.
"Good," Sesshomaru replied before he began to pull away from her, but Rin's hold around his waist only tightened.
"Please...don't leave," she begged, the sound of her voice still giving Sesshomaru an unexpected high. He returned to his original position, and heard her softly sigh in content.
"You should get some rest," he told her before his hold on her tightened slightly, "if you want me to stay with you...then I will,"
"Thank you," Rin murmured before she slowly pulled away from him, but laced her fingers with his as she held his hand and led him towards the bed. Sesshomaru knew what he was doing was wrong. He should leave while he still could. He couldn't promise that he'd behave like she wanted him to if he stayed.
Rin laid down on the bed first, still stubbornly holding on to his hand, as she made herself comfortable atop the covers. Sesshomaru slid in next to her so that they were facing one another. He watched as Rin idly played with his hand in her own. He tried to keep his distance, already intoxicated by the way their scents were mixing from being so close together.
However, he was surprised to notice that his desire was quelled by the need to comfort her. Something within him wanted to protect her more than claim her. He was instantly brought back to the sight of the back alley that served as a battlefield earlier that day. He remembered how he had given in to the beast within him to defeat Kasai and the other bear demons. He had almost completely lost himself in the process, but something had brought him back.
Rin had brought him back. He remembered feeling her fingers running through his fur and the way she looked so collected despite being face to face with a beast who could easily kill her. The beast had been fully awakened, and yet it hadn't killed her. Instead, it had submitted to her and allowed her to pet it like a domestic animal.
Sesshomaru could feel the beast within him rumble in content at the sight of Rin growing steadily calmer beside him. She had tamed the beast within him, and he tried to tame the nightmare within her. He only hoped he was as successful as she had been. Only time would tell.
The couple remained close to one another with their hands linked for the rest of the night.
A/N: Whew! That was a rather long chapter by my standards! I know I didn't address Kohaku/Kagura in this update, but I will! I just felt like this was a strong Sesshomaru/Rin development chapter that it should stand on its own without any interruptions.
I also apologize if the chapter seemed really dark/graphic. I tried to censor it and leave more implied than described, but if it still bothered or offended anyone I am really sorry. I am also happy to change it or take it out completely. It was a direction I was planning to go, but I'm not sure if I delivered it well to you guys. Let me know, please!
Until next time, and thank you for reading, as always!