Mercury yawned. "What a pain." the assassin's son moaned. "I swear, if Ice Cream's not literally dying, I'm going to kill her." He stumbled down the darkened streets of Vale, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Three AM, Em! Three fucking AM!"

"I'm sure Neo had important reasons for waking us at this hour." Emerald mumbled. Cinder had not been amused when all their Scrolls started ringing in the middle of the night, particularly when a mute was the apparent caller. She'd angrily demanded to know if this was Roman's idea of a prank, before Neo messaged them a location in the city and the word 'HELP'. "And for, you know, coming back from Mountain Glenn."

"Not important enough for Cinder to come herself, apparently." Mercury grumbled.

"Well, our leader needs her beauty sleep." Emerald said loftily. "Here. I think this is the spot." She turned down a deserted alleyway, Mercury following in her wake. "We're here." she said to the empty air. "Coast is clear. You can come out—"

A manhole cover in the alley shifted aside with a grinding of metal on asphalt. A small hand reached over the edge, and Neo dragged herself out to lie limply on the ground, dripping with various unidentified sewer fluids. "Oh gods!" Mercury stumbled back, holding his nose. "Em? Can you, like, hallucinate us the smell of flowers or something?"

"I only do sight and hearing!" Emerald whimpered. "This is going to suck..."

TRANSCRIPT: "VNN Newsroom", air time 0800 Vale Standard Time, 9/20/80.

[Chyron: "MYSTERIOUS GRIMM NOISES"]

LISA LAVENDER: ...next up, we turn to the mysterious happenings in the Residential District this morning. Around 2:20 AM, the Vale Fire Department received multiple calls about the ground shaking. About 20 minutes after that, residents of the Greenwood Towers apartments began reporting loud Grimm-like noises coming from under the building.

[A map of the Vale Residential District is shown. Two dots are shown, one marked 'EARTHQUAKE?' and another marked 'GRIMM?' slightly to the northwest.]

LAVENDER: We're still awaiting an explanation, but most residents have evacuated, for understandable reasons. VNN's Cyril Ian is on the scene, and has an eyewitness account for us. Cyril?

[Shot cuts away from the studio. We see a crowd of people standing in a plaza across the street from an apartment building, looking frightened. Growling noises are faint but audible. VNN reporter CYRIL IAN is visible, holding a microphone up to the WITNESS, a bearded middle-aged man.]

WITNESS: Anyways, there I am, 2AM, can't sleep, [EXPLETIVE] back acting up again. So, as you do, I go to the [EXPLETIVE] liquor cabinet, get the Fireball—

IAN: Um, sir, we're on live...

WITNESS: Oh [EXPLETIVE], really? Anyways, I was pouring out a shot when outta [EXPLETIVE] nowhere, I hear a Beowolf growling, and boy, I do not wanna hear that [EXPLETIVE] in the middle of the night. Scared the [EXPLETIVE] out of me. Thought it might be the booze, but then the neighbor started screaming about how we were all gonna [EXPLETIVE] die so I skedaddled the [EXPLETIVE] out of there, man. [WITNESS lifts a glass bottle and drinks directly from it, then belches] Shoulda known this place was cheap as [EXPLETIVE] for a reason—

IAN: Um, well, thank you very much. Back to you, Lisa.

[Cut back to the studio, where LAVENDER has her face in her hands.]

LAVENDER: Oh gods, the FCC is— [she appears to realize she is on camera, and assumes a more professional posture] Er...we apologize to anyone offended. VNN in no way endorses the language used. Anyways, I've been informed the Vale Council has just now issued a statement, saying that the noises are [looks down at Scroll] quote, "an acoustic illusion generated by natural seismic activity", and that there is, quote "no risk of a Grimm incursion into the city."

[CHYRON: "COUNCIL: EVERYTHING IS FINE"]

LAVENDER: And now for a word from our sponsor—

"An earthquake, councilors?" Ozpin said drily. In this part of Sanus? Localized to a single city block? Vale, as every child learned in primary school, was a tectonically stable area. It was among the various reasons the kingdom's founder, a certain King Oscar the First, had chosen to build his capital here. "And...an acoustic illusion. Dear me." He sipped his coffee, in a fashion a younger man might describe as 'sassy', then sighed in satisfaction. That was some good coffee.

Despite being tiny shapes on a holographic screen, the council members looked visibly affronted. One of them, an older man, harrumphed indignantly. "We had to come up with something on short notice, all right?" Mustard was his name, Ozpin recalled. A veteran of the Faunus Wars, whose boasted feats rather outstripped his actual ones. He still wore his bright yellow combat outfit, though these days it barely contained his pot belly. "We couldn't let rumor run rampant, so close to the Festival! It would be a disaster for us all, for Beacon, if word got out that...erm..."

"That a massive Grimm horde was seconds from breaching the city?" James Ironwood said. The general's face occupied the entire right side of the screen for some reason, causing the councilors to be comically compressed. "Gods. Why does the Mountain Glenn tunnel come out right in downtown, anyways?"

Ozpin coughed lightly. "I assure you, James, it was not my decision." The Ozma of that period had spent his life in Atlas, fooling around with the Relic of Creation, and helping a friend with his little Dust shop on the side, which had rapidly grown to be not-so-little. He missed Nicholas, sometimes.

"And why." James continued. "Why on Remnant did you build an apartment building over it?"

"I think the idea was to put the site to good use, help people move on, you know." A elderly woman piped up. Councilwoman White's husband had fallen to his death down a flight of stairs, halfway through his term a quarter century ago. His widow had won the special election on the sympathy vote, and held his seat ever since. "It was really depressing to just have that bricked-up tunnel sitting here."

Ozpin held up a hand. "A fascinating tale, but we're getting sidetracked. What does the Council intend to do about this, if I may ask?" Now for the hard part. So close to the dense emotions of the city, the Grimm stuck behind the Mountain Glenn barrier were unlikely to disperse on their own. In fact, the fear generated by their presence might even add to their numbers. The most effective way to clean them up would be via a controlled breach in the wall, but Councils tended to dislike it when you set off explosions in their cities, particularly weeks before a major international event.

"Well, the damn growling is scaring people, we can't have that. Probably need to relocate some of them." Councilman Mustard twirled his mustache. As he'd thought. Still, he literally had lifetimes of experience at wrangling politicians; with enough flattery and bartering and other diplomatic tricks, he was sure he could bring them around. "Maybe some white noise generators to cover up—"

A crunching noise, suspiciously like a metal fist hitting a metal wall, echoed over the call. The councilors flinched. "And what about the Grimm? There's a knife to the throat of this city, and all you can talk about is noise generators?" James demanded. "We must act, before it's too late! Let me bring my best units in. We'll rip them out their hole, shred them with the full firepower of the Atlesian fleet!"

Ozpin resisted the urge to groan. James always had a bit of trouble understanding that the other kingdoms didn't work like his. The headmaster of Beacon didn't have two Council seats (or even one), or an army of obedient Huntsmen at his beck and call. He pushed and prodded events along from behind the curtain, rather than rule with a literal iron fist from the literal heavens. "Show some respect, young man!" Mustard scolded. "I don't take orders from you!" The next few seconds were drowned out in cross-talk. White screeched about how the Glenn barrier had held for decades, and how dare he question Valean engineering. James made some comparisons between the councilors and ostriches, to which they took general offense. Mustard tossed in a few barbed reminders about which side had won the Great War, and blustered that he'd let Atlesian troops shoot up the city over his dead body.

He'd best cut this argument short, before James tried to take up the offer. "Enough!" Ozpin boomed, in his best impression of his Warrior-King incarnation. The Council members went quiet. James's hand actually twitched as though to salute, before he checked himself. "I apologize for my colleague, councilors. If you are so against this course of action, we cannot force you. And won't, of course. We have...the utmost respect for your sovereignty over Vale's matters, right James?" The general's face was still dark with anger, but he nodded reluctantly. "Now, I do believe we've all had a stressful morning. Why don't we adjourn, and come back with cooler heads?" After some muttered agreements and tense goodbyes, the councilors hung up. As soon as they were gone, more metal-on-metal banging came from James's end. Sighing, Ozpin took a Scroll from out of his drawer. "You can come up now."

A minute later, the elevator doors opened and Qrow Branwen swaggered into the headmaster's office. "Didn't trust me with the bigwigs, huh?" He put a hand over his heart in mock pain. "I'm hurt, Oz."

"You know why that is." Ozpin said mildly. Qrow might be his most trusted field agent, but he was rather lacking in the tact ('bullshit' as he would call it) needed for politics. The day he let the alcoholic bird-man represent him in front of the Council was the day he grew tired of being headmaster. Qrow shrugged, and went to sit on the desk, kicking his legs in the air. "Hello to you too, Jimmy." he said into the video screen. "Wow! They really pissed you off, huh?"

"They were useless!" James roared in frustration. "I swear, if those were my men, I'd have them—"

"You'd have them shot. We get it." Qrow took his flask out of his pocket. "It's not healthy, you know, wanting to execute people all the time. How about you try a different kind of shot?" He tipped the flask back and poured another measure of unidentified alcohol down his gullet. "Works for me."

"Can you two compare unhealthy coping strategies later?" Ozpin interjected.

"And the War, can you believe he mentioned the War? As if he did anything in it!" James ranted on. "If that lot had been in charge, Mantle would've won in a week! Do you ever regret abolishing the monarchy, Oz?"

The wizard chuckled. "I confess, there are times I miss having the authority. But overall, no. The quality of our kings was quite hit or miss." His past self was the one people remembered most, but Vale had seen its share of mad kings and idiot kings too. King Peter III had believed himself a Grimm in human form, and stalked the palace stabbing anyone who looked too sad. Alexander VI had declared there was a secret mermaid faunus kingdom at the bottom of the sea, and sunk half the royal fleet trying to 'conquer' it. He couldn't always reincarnate as royalty, and didn't want to either. Doing paperwork for all eternity was a worse curse than anything the Brothers had inflicted on him. "Whatever else, the Council tends to be more...consistent. I find they can usually be made to see reason if you handle them carefully."

At that, he gave his fellow headmaster a very pointed look. James groaned. "Fine, fine, I'll give them their respect next time." He rubbed the metal plate in his forehead. "Hopefully they'll allow us to at least guard the spot."

Ozpin frowned. "James, if you move your robots into the city people will ask questions—"

"Maybe they should." Qrow said bluntly. James opened his mouth to argue, then belatedly realized Qrow had actually agreed with him. "I was there, Oz, and we were this close to disaster." He held up his thumb and forefinger, an inch apart. "And still are. That wall's a big juicy target for whoever's behind this. Better to make people a bit nervous than to leave our ass wide open." Both headmasters cringed at that mental image. "Don't get me wrong, Jimmy, I don't like your fucking tin cans, but they exist. Might as well put them to good use."

"Er, thank you, Qrow. I think?" James blinked, still stunned they were on the same side for once. "It's the lesser of two evils, yes, but we don't have a choice. Unless the Council backs down, but I doubt they will. It's always hear no evil, see no evil with them." His hand went back to the plate. The thing was shiny from friction. "Gods, it's the CCT incident all over again."

"Wait, what happened with the CCT?" Qrow asked.

"Ah, right, you wouldn't know. It was only two days ago." Ozpin explained. "Someone broke into this tower on dance night. We think they went into the server room. Didn't find out until after the fact—they knocked out about a half-dozen guards to get in—"

Qrow's eyebrows shot up into his hair. "Shit, really? That sounds...incredibly bad." He looked suspiciously around the office, as if expecting to find a Grimm holding a video camera. "Should we even be, you know, meeting in here?"

"That's what I said!" James exclaimed. "But no, according to the Council, it's not worth investigating."

Ozpin leaned back in his chair. "To be fair, your idea of 'investigating' was to turn off the Internet." The general had the good grace to look abashed. "And I think the CCT may not have been their target. They may have been seeking...something else." He wiggled his eyebrows meaningfully. "Besides, we ran...what was it called, an anti-bacterial scan?"

"Antivirus." Qrow corrected with a grin. "Eh, don't blame you. Must be hard, keeping up with technology at your age." Ozpin gave him look of mild reproach, while James's lips twitched slightly. "That did come up clean, yes." said the general. "One of Watts's applications. So was the CCT firewall. Man knew his computers, even if he was a right pain in the behind. But how many more bullets can we dodge, Oz?" He sighed deeply. "How is...you know, the seasonal situation?"

"I'm afraid autumn will be over soon." Ozpin said grimly. Every day he visited Amber in her chamber, he felt the link between her magic and her battered body weakening. It was a miracle of Atlesian science she had even survived this long, but no one could cheat death forever. Except for Salem. And himself. "It'll last through the Festival, but beyond that, I can't promise anything."

James swallowed hard. "I see. Should we prepare for winter?"

"We'll be forced to, unless we get a breakthrough soon." The prospect of sucking out half a Maiden's soul and shoving it into some other girl was not one Ozpin relished. Ethics aside, the idea of transplanting magic like it was a spare kidney rather offended his wizard sensibilities. "Roman Torchwick is the best lead we have. We need to convince him to cooperate." The criminal was currently locked up on the general's flagship; considering his extensive connections to the Vale underworld, it had been deemed the safest option. "Qrow, continue your search. Focusing on Vale may be our best bet, with everything that's happened here."

Qrow gave a thumbs-up. "Roger that. I'll keep working on the, uh, climate change stuff." Soon after, James disconnected with a promise to keep in touch. "By the way, Tai's waiting in the lobby. Wants to talk to you." Qrow whispered once he was gone. "I think he has some, uh, opinions about the mission you gave the kids."

The blood drained from Ozpin's face. No. Generals and politicians were one thing, but a parent-teacher conference with an angry father was another. "Can't you get Glynda to handle this?" he begged.

"I checked. She's not touching this shit with a ten-foot pole. Said since it was your idea, you should be the one. Which, well, makes sense to me." Qrow clapped him on the shoulder, smirking. "Good luck, Oz."

"Ohhh no..."

Jaune's eyes fluttered open. A moment later he shut them again, hissing in pain, as an unnaturally bright light seared his retinas. Gods, what was that? His body lay on something soft, unlike the hard stone of Mountain Glenn—oh, right, it was his bed. And that light was, you know, the sun. All that time underground was screwing with his head. He slowly forced his lids apart, blinking a few times to adjust to the surface world, then sat up to check his Scroll. It was one o'clock on Tuesday afternoon. Geez, he'd been asleep for what, nine or ten hours? After they'd dropped into the middle of the woods, the adrenaline had worn off and everyone had just sort of crashed. He dimly remembered Qrow making a call to someone at Beacon, and an airship turning up to whisk them all back to school. They'd somehow dragged themselves up to their dorms; Jaune had been out the moment his head hit the pillow, not even bothering to shower or change. The room looked exactly the same as they'd left it (better, actually; apparently Miss Goodwitch had come to clean up the dog-induced mess at some point). There was something surreal about suddenly going from an abandoned city teeming with death, to a cozy dorm with all their gubbins on the walls—Blake's books and Yang's boy band poster and Sable's painting of a snow-capped mountain. Speaking of his teammates, both girls' beds were empty, but their leader was still stretched out atop the covers like a princess in a glass coffin. The peaceful expression on his sleeping face looked completely unnatural, at once disturbing, hilarious, and...weirdly adorable?

Well, if Jaune accidentally woke him, that face would certainly change in a hurry. Tiptoeing out of the room, he found himself facing Team RRWN's closed door. The sight brought back distant memories of the Beacon Dance—wait, holy crap, that had been less than two days ago! So much had happened that it felt like months had passed. He'd met the rest of Yang's family, fought zombies, almost died...let's see, twice on the Bullhead, the skeleton, the bomb, the King Tajitu...like, five times? Jaune shivered. He suddenly had the sensation of balancing over a pit. Before he could overthink things and fall, he raised his hand and knocked softly. Rather than any of Team RRWN, it was Pyrrha, of all people, who opened up. "Oh, hello! Come in, come in!" Ruby and Weiss were the only other ones here (only people—he spotted the curled-up shape of a sleeping dog under Ruby's bed). They sat on the floor, surrounded by boxes and bags and cans. The smell of sugar and fried stuff permeated the room. "Help yourself. We're having a bit of a, well, I'm not sure. Victory party? Support group?"

"Thanks." Jaune abruptly realized how hungry he was; he hadn't had the chance to eat anything in the tunnels, except a few dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets. He grabbed a can of soda and a random bag of junk food from the pile (barbecue potato chips, as it happened). "Where's everyone else?"

"Nora's still in the infirmary, and Ren's staying with her." Weiss informed him. "She's going to be all right, apparently, but she hasn't woken up yet."

"Yang was here in earlier, but then she wandered off." Ruby said quietly. "I think she had a lot on her mind." She lay on her back, pouring chocolate chips into her mouth right from the bag. Jaune winced. Yes, meeting your mother for the first time like that couldn't be fun. He had no idea how it must feel. His own parents had been very committed to each other, judging from their many offspring, and the occasional noises from their room he tried his best to forget.

"Sable's still asleep too." Jaune felt the need to add his own contribution. "He looks fine, though. I mean, I didn't stare at him while he was sleeping because that would be really creepy, but he seemed, um, healthy." Weiss rolled her eyes and made a 'zip it' gesture. For a few minutes they just sat and stuffed their faces in silence. Jaune wondered if they felt as lost as he did. How did you even begin to talk about all the nonsense that had gone down? "So, how's everyone doing?" he ventured.

"Fine." Ruby mumbled through a mouthful of chocolate. The others looked at her skeptically. "Ruby." Jaune said gently. "I know what it's like, feeling like you have to tough things out. But that, uh, it doesn't really work. I mean, look what happened to me!" He chuckled ruefully. At least Past Jaune's mental breakdown served as a wonderful example of what not to do. "I think that mission freaked everyone out a little. No one's going to judge you over it, right?"

Pyrrha shook her head, and Weiss made a vague noise of agreement. Ruby curled up into a little red ball of embarrassment. "Is it that obvious?"

"You've been quiet and moody, which is...not your thing at all." Weiss said. "Also? That was full when we started." She pointed at the bag of chocolate chips in her partner's hand, now empty.

"Oops." Ruby sat up, still hugging her knees to her chest. "It's just, that didn't go how I expected, like, at all! I didn't think being a Huntress was easy, but still..." She pulled her hood down over her eyes. "Nora got hurt. And that bomb, I thought Yang—I thought you all might have..." Died. Jaune felt the pit under him growing again. "Not your fault." he said quickly. "I mean, we all agreed to go—"

"No, I see her point." Weiss interrupted. "That was, um...very intense for a first training mission."

Ruby nodded. "Yeah. I keep thinking about Raven, too. If she hadn't been there, I don't know how it would've turned out. And she said all that weird stuff too. 'Remember who got you into this mess, and who saved you...'"she trailed off. "Like, did she mean Ozpin?" Jaune frowned. He didn't want to put much stock in Raven's words, considering how generally shady she'd acted, but it was hard to deny she'd bailed them out of a tight spot. Ruby sighed. "Maybe I should've told him no."

"I'm glad you didn't." Pyrrha put a hand on her shoulder. "The only ones to blame here are Torchwick and the White Fang. We all knew what we were getting into when we joined Beacon." Jaune laughed nervously. "Er, or at least figured it out eventually. Risking our lives to protect people is what we do." Ruby smiled, a sparkle returning to her silver eyes. "And you can't expect yourself to predict everything perfectly. Even the professionals, I think one in eight die—" Ruby made a choking noise and fell over. "Pyrrha!" Weiss scolded.

Jaune's jaw dropped. "Wait, one in eight? Are you serious? I mean, uh, that's on average, right, you girls are all super strong and I'm sure you'll be fine!" He pondered that statistic a little more carefully. "Oh shit..."

Pyrrha jumped up, arms waving in a panic. "AHH! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I, um, I just read that somewhere and it might be fake news and I don't think anyone is going to die, okay? Look, in the end we made it out, we stopped the train, and we'll be stronger for it!" She held her hands out to the sides. "I, um, I see this as an absolute win!"

"Oh, yeah!" Ruby perked up immediately, now grinning from ear to ear. "We saved the city, didn't we? On our first mission ever! And everyone lived! I guess that counts as a happy ending, huh?"

"Technically not everyone lived." Weiss corrected. "The White Fang certainly didn't."

Ruby fell over again. "Weiss!" Pyrrha scolded. Jaune knew the feeling. He remembered being bummed about all the dead enemies after the docks battle, and Sable saying something to reassure him. What had it been? Oh right, that they were all terrorists who deserved to die. Somehow, he doubted that would make Ruby feel any better. Luckily, Zwei chose that moment to make a move. He padded out from under the bed and licked Ruby's face. Weiss stroked his fur, mumbling apologies; Jaune did likewise, and the pit under him got smaller and smaller. A warm dog, apparently, was worth a million words. And Pyrrha...the champion had moved to the other side of the room, watching them with something akin to horror. "What's wrong?" he asked. "Wait, are you afraid of dogs too? Like Blake?" The poor girl shook her head in denial, but the hand clutched protectively to her throat said otherwise.

Nora hadn't expected she'd be the one to die. Come on, who killed off the comic relief? And she hadn't collected a single death flag either! How unfair! She hadn't revealed any dark secrets, hadn't confessed her love, hadn't announced her pending retirement from Huntress-ing, and yet here she was, done in by a freaking ice cream flavor. Stuck in this weird tropical island-looking afterlife dimension, never to see her friends again, except maybe in some light-hearted alternate reality with wacky head-to-body proportions. In hindsight, she should've listened to Ren—

Oh crap, Ren! Nora looked around fearfully, half-expecting her friend to drop from the sky with a donut hole in his chest. She jumped into the sea, shouting for him to run, except the ocean was made of maple syrup instead of water for some reason, and she just sank into it like quicksand. Crap! She couldn't die again, could she? Also, she had no pants on! Wait, she never wore pants anyways, that was normal.

Her eyes snapped open. No more syrup sea, no more island, just an unfamiliar ceiling over her head. "Nora!" Ren's voice gasped. She tried to sit up, only to fall back with a pained yelp. Well, maybe she was alive after all, and that had just been another concussion dream. She was pretty sure dead people didn't get headaches this bad. "Ow." she groaned. "I feel like I got hit with Magnhild, Renny..."

"That's because you did." Ren helped her lie back down. She was on a bed, she realized, one of those white hospital cots with super scratchy sheets. He pressed a finger to her forehead and rubbed soothingly. Ahh. Ren's magic hands always made her feel better, though he got a bit annoyed when she referred to his pressure point techniques that way. He also insisted it'd work better if he stuck her full of needles, but no way was she letting that happen. "Easy there. Does anything else hurt?"

Nora slid a hand into her shirt. There was a bandage stuck to her chest, but no pain when she pressed against it. Seemed her Aura had taken care of that pinprick. Thank gods she had a lot of natural shielding down there. "Nah, it's good." She turned her head to look out the bedside window. "Wait, this is Beacon! How did we...?" Nora proudly messed up her partner's hair. "Dang! You beat that girl all by yourself?"

Ren shook his head. "No, and I don't think I could have." He tried his best to flatten his hair, but the pink streak stubbornly stuck up. "Honestly? I thought we were done for, but then, well...I saw colors."

"You saw colors? Like, not a thing that was colored, just colors hanging out on their own?" Her headache intensified again trying to picture it. "Are you sure you didn't hit your head too?"

"Yes, I'm sure." Ren said patiently. "There were these little specks and flakes floating around her—"

"Oh, like confetti?"

"It sounds so trivial when you put it like that." he grumbled. "But...yes. Exactly like confetti." Oh, that sounded awesome! Like having a wild party follow you wherever you went! Although, Ren wasn't really the type to appreciate wild parties. "I was so confused. At first I thought it was Neo's Semblance again. But then, I got a strong feeling that maybe, she wasn't completely set on killing us? So I kind of, um, begged for our lives...yeah."

He looked away in shame, but Nora squeezed his hand, smiling. "Nothing to be ashamed of, Renny. I mean, what else were you going to say?" She put on an over-the-top macho voice. "Ooh, what are you going to do, stab us? Bet you don't have the guts!" Ren's lips twitched upwards. "My ghost, would, like, be totally mad at your ghost! Pfft!" Nora burst into helpless laughter at her own joke, while Ren waited for her to get it out her system. She was sure she heard a snicker or two out of him, though. "What happened next?"

"Well, I think it kind of worked. She just kept standing there menacingly." Ren continued, far more relaxed now. "I figured out that each color represented an emotion. She had a lot of worry, a lot of fear—that was all I got, then Port busted through the roof and she ran away."

Huh. So Ren could read emotions now, not just mask them. That was cool. Wait, holy crap, Ren could read emotions now! AAHH! "Wait, so you just know what everyone's feeling all the time?!" Nora suddenly wanted to melt into the mattress. If Ren read certain feelings she tended to get around him, she might die for real, from sheer mortification. But he simply reached out to stroke her hair. "It reads emotions, not minds." he said. "I could tell Neo was afraid, but not of what. Besides, it'd wouldn't be polite to always have that on, don't you think?" Nora sighed in relief. Of course Ren would be a stickler about respecting privacy. She didn't know what she'd been worried about. "Not like I need a Semblance to read you." he teased.

"Hey!" Nora giggled, swatting him playfully on the arm. "But yeah, it'd be pretty rude to vibe check people all the time. Hey! Can we start calling it that now? Like, I think 'Vibe Check' is a way cooler name than 'Tranquility'!"

"Please stop turning my powers into memes."

"—and then Weiss beat up Torchwick with his own cane! It was wild!" Ruby said animatedly. "Qrow showed up right after, and you know the rest." So ended her glorious tale of Team RRWN's fight on the train. Jaune roared with laughter. Okay, that was probably not how a Huntress should treat a prisoner, but after all the crap the criminal had put them through, he couldn't deny it sounded pretty cathartic. "Oh man." he wheezed. "You really are twins, huh?" The heiress buried her face in her hands. Jaune's eye caught the cane in question, leaning against the foot of her bed next to Myrtenaster. "You planning to keep that as a trophy?"

"Haven't decided. No one asked, so I just held on to it." Weiss picked up the cane and gave it a few twirls. "Have you ever considered a ranged weapon, Jaune?"

Jaune laughed again. "I think I'd better figure out a sword first."

"Hm. Maybe I could use it as a paperweight." Weiss put the cane down on her lap. "Anyways, I believe you owe us a story now. I'm still curious about what those skeletons were. Not to mention how our cover got blown." He flinched slightly under her disapproving gaze. "It wasn't my fault..." he said meekly.

"Yeah, and tell us how you met Raven!" Ruby added. And so, he launched into a retelling of their various adventures and misadventures. Cheers and groans alike greeted the story about the Grimm horde and the exploding building. Ruby shivered when he described finding the corpse in the underground city, and actually screamed when it came back to life, before Weiss shushed her. All three looked excited for the giant skeleton fight, only to be disappointed when he admitted he'd been knocked out and had no idea how they had won. Zwei barked and jumped a lot at that part, but sadly, it didn't translate well to human-speak. There were sympathetic noises when the White Fang stumbled upon them; Pyrrha assured him there was nothing they could have done, though Weiss grumbled that her brother had probably screamed too loud. He continued through the brief fight in the station, the bomb, the climb to safety and the King Tajitu's attack. The girls leaned forward in suspense, making sounds of concern and/or shock when appropriate. "—so, I don't really understand what happened next." he admitted. "But, um, some ghost skeleton arm or whatever showed up—"

"WHAAAT?!" Weiss shrieked. Her hand clenched, accidentally pressing a button on the cane. Its hook shot out like a bullet and hit Jaune right in the mouth. As he lay on the floor, trying to make sure he still had the right number of teeth, he could hear the heiress running around the room screaming. "Ahhh! AAAHHH! I don't believe it! I'M BEING LEFT BEHIND!"

"Weiss, please calm down..." Pyrrha begged, to no avail. Ruby had taken to cowering under her bed with Zwei; two frightened silver eyes peeked out from the gloom. The madness only ended when a fist pounded on the door, so hard the entire room shook. "Weiss, shut up!" Sable yelled from outside. "What the hell are you screaming about?"

The heiress practically wrenched the door off its hinges. "YOU! Tell me!" She grabbed her much taller brother by the lapels and shook him like a doll. "How did you summon? HOW?!"

"Wha—what?" Sable said dizzily. His hair and outfit were rumpled, as if he'd just gotten out of bed, which he probably had. Weiss snatched up her rapier and dragged him out the door, with such speed that Jaune expected to see white rose petals. The twins' shouting slowly receded down the hall. "Hey, hey, CALM DOWN!" Sable demanded, rather hypocritically. "Let me go, damn it! I didn't even shower yet!"

"We don't have time for that!"

"At least let me fix my hair—!"

Pyrrha removed her hands from her ears. "Goodness, what a family." she muttered, still shell-shocked. "Hey...did they forget they had a bet, or...?"

"B-better not remind them." Ruby warned.

Sun slowly stroked his nonexistent beard, pursing his lips like some wrinkled old sage. "Hm, I see." he said in a grandfatherly tone. "And how does that make you feel?"

Blake stayed quiet for a moment. She tucked her hands under her head, staring up at the sky. The stone of the Beacon roofs felt warm against her back; it was another sunny day in Vale (actually, had it rained once this whole year? Were they in a drought?). That clusterfuck of a mission had left her with a lot of feelings, all right, few of which she could discuss with her team. On a whim, she'd messaged her de facto secret-keeper, and to her slight surprise, Sun had agreed to talk. Apparently Team SSSN's mission didn't start for a couple more days and he was getting bored again. So here they were, meeting on a secluded rooftop for the third time that semester. For such a talkative person, he'd proven a surprisingly good listener. He sat by her side, like a psychologist with a patient lying on the couch, replete with glasses and tie and fake mustache (a bit distracting, that last one). "You were right." she finally said. "About this secret. I can't keep it up forever."

Sun smiled in relief. "Glad you figured that out. So you're going to tell them?"

Blake turned her head away from him. "Not quite. After the school year's over, I'm requesting a transfer to Shade." Vacuo was said to be the most faunus-friendly kingdom, a place where your species and past didn't matter, so long as you were strong enough to survive (why hadn't she gone there in the first place, actually? Eh, water under the bridge...).

Even though she'd purposely avoided Sun's eyes, the disappointment was clear enough in his voice. "Really? After all that, you're just going to leave?"

"It's not like I want to." she said. "But this isn't working, Sun. I wasted years in the White Fang because I was scared to admit that. I won't make the same mistake again." She'd been embedded in their nine-person group for over half a year, but Blake felt more a stranger than ever. Day by day, she'd watched Ozpin's crazy social experiment solidify and grow into something stronger, while she herself always lurked on its fringes, the impostor among them. She didn't even know if she could face them today, knowing just how easily she could've been fighting on the other side, could've been another misguided soul lying dead in the tunnels. "The longer I stay, the worse it'll be. It wouldn't be fair to them." Sure, maybe they'd be upset at first, but it wasn't like she'd been anyone's best friend. Pyrrha could take her spot on the team and stop being so damn lonely—the girl seemed ridiculously nice, to say nothing of her skills, so Blake wouldn't be missed for long.

"Blake. Blake. Blake." Sun groaned. He moved to her other side, so that she had to look him in the eye again. "These are your teammates we're talking about, not a bunch of terrorists. You could at least try and talk through things!"

"There's nothing to talk about." she retorted. "Look at the facts. One, I was in the White Fang. Two, my leader thinks they're, like, vermin who should be wiped from the face of Remnant." After what her old comrades had tried to do to Vale, she was no longer entirely sure Sable was wrong. That was...disturbing to consider.

"Well, maybe he thinks so because you haven't shown him any proof otherwise! Ever considered that?"

Blake scoffed. "People like him don't change their minds." Adam hadn't. Once he made a decision, he only ever doubled down rather go by halves (quite stereotypical of a bull faunus, in hindsight). If, hypothetically, a White Fang member confessed to him they were actually human, and a former SDC executive to boot, they wouldn't leave alive. The best they could expect for was a body still suitable for an open casket.

Sun tugged on his fake mustache, evidently agitated. "You're killing me, Blake. Look, you joined Beacon because you felt bad about helping those jerks, right?" She nodded. "Didn't you expect you'd have to, you know, own up eventually?"

"Of course!" Blake said heatedly. "Just...this isn't the time or place, okay? It's way too dangerous!"

"If you won't risk anything, are you even sorry?" Sun snapped. Blake bolted upright, glaring furiously. How dare he! "Shit, I didn't mean it!" he apologized immediately. "Fucking hit me. I deserve it." She realized she'd pulled her hand back to strike, and sheepishly lowered it. "I know you mean well! I know you're trying to make things right! And yeah, I don't really understand what you've been through..." he yanked his mustache again, only for it to tear off. "Ow, ow! I just...I'd hate for you to throw all this away, you know?" He rubbed his freshly waxed upper lip, wincing. "I'm sorry, Blake. I'll leave now."

"No...it's fine. You were only trying to help." Blake reassured him. "I'm sorry too. About, um, almost slapping you. Let's just say we're both sorry and forget it." Awkward silence fell. She tried to think of some other conversation topic, so she and her closest thing to a real friend didn't part on sour terms. "So, um, how have you been lately?"

The monkey faunus eye-rolled at her blatant non sequitir, but played along nonetheless. "Uh, same as usual. I mean, we saw each other yesterday, remember? Just chatting with the boys. Oh, and Penny too." He smiled fondly, a far cry from the frustrated expression he'd had with her. "I was saying how it sucked we can't hang more because she's always busy training and shit, so we're on Scroll-number basis now! I'm, uh, not actually sure she has one, but the texts are coming from somewhere. Girl's pretty good with tech."

"How did you become friends with her, anyways? I never asked." A faunus boy from Vacuo and a human girl from Atlas was not a pairing Blake would've expected. "People from Atlas tend to have...problems with our sort."

"Hey! Penny's not like that!" Sun sounded a bit offended. "Yeah, she acts sort of strange, but she's, like, a freaking cinnamon roll, okay? Her dad's some big-name scientist; you could say she grew up pretty sheltered. Not that I mind, I kind of like quirky girls." he blushed faintly. "Um, and that stuff she does with the lasers is real kick-ass too..." As Sun continued to go on and on about his maybe-girlfriend, Blake couldn't help but feel slight envy. Why couldn't she have gotten so lucky with her upper-class Atlesian? "Oh, right, how we met! Crazy story, she was actually supposed to arrest me for not buying boat tickets, but I said, like, we should be friends instead and it worked. I wasn't really expecting it to." What? None of that made a lick of sense, but that was Sun for you, she mused. The boy thought infiltrating White Fang rallies was fun, for gods' sake. Half of her wished she had a quarter of that audacity.

And holy crap, he was still talking. "...her dad's a doctor too, apparently he does charity work down in Mantle, I think that's real neat. I might visit over break, never been to Solitas before anyways. Just hope the guy likes me..."

Yang completed her approximately 23,067th lap around the Beacon fountain. She barely noticed the sun getting lower in the sky, or the odd passerby wondering why this crazy girl kept walking in circles. Her thoughts wandered in a similarly roundabout path, replaying that scene in the tunnel over and over. The first chance she got, Yang was going to track her mom down and punch some answers out of her. Or maybe she would bide her time, see how Raven liked being made to wait for a change. She felt like a little girl again, plucking petals off a daisy. Loves me, loves me not, loves me...out of the blue, something flicked her on the forehead. "Huh?" She rubbed the spot, more in surprise than pain. Sable was standing in front of her, one hand raised and one on his hip. "Finally!" he complained. "I was calling to you for a whole minute! What are you doing?"

"Heh. My bad. You feeling better, Icy-Hot?" Despite falling asleep the minute they exited the portal, all the way to morning—she and Blake had been literally forced to carry him up to their room—Sable still looked tired and crabby. Admittedly, there was nothing unusual about the latter. He brushed off her concern with a dismissive wave. "Don't worry about me. Weiss and I were just trying to figure out my summons. Still have no idea how I did it..." He let out a little hiss of displeasure, like steam from a kettle. "Enough about that, what's wrong with you? Wandering aimlessly, looking all broody, it's not like you. Who are you, Blake?"

Yang chuckled weakly. "It's my mom." she admitted. "You got the gist of it, right? I kind of...yelled it out for everyone back there." In hindsight, maybe not her smartest decision. She didn't need her friends to start treating her like some poor motherless child overnight. "Oh. Right." Sable stared at the ground, suddenly uncomfortable. "Um...couldn't you talk to Ruby about this? Or Qrow? Or your father?"

"I don't want to bother them." That was only half-true. She had learned long ago that Dad and Qrow weren't keen on the topic. And Ruby needed a big sister, not a quivering ball of sadness and mommy issues. But...maybe, she could use an outsider's opinion. Someone who would give her cold, hard advice, not pity or comforting lies. She sat down on the rim of the fountain and patted the spot next to her. "Hey. Sit with me."

"You're fine with bothering me?" Sable complained, though he took the seat anyways.

Yang elbowed him. "You're team leader. It's your job to listen to our problems." She took a moment to gather her thoughts, nervously twirling her hair. "This is confusing, man. Like, before this, I figured she just didn't care. Didn't want the fuss of raising a kid. Thought I'd find her one day, tell her I turned out fine without her, something like that. But then she goes and pulls this crap, and who knows how many times she's spied on me and I just didn't notice, and then there was all that cryptic bullshit she spouted, and I—I understand her even less now!" Something crunched in her hand. Water began dripping out from a broken part of the fountain wall. "I don't know what to think anymore."

Sable frowned. "In that case...maybe you should stop thinking about it?"

"The hell kind of advice is that?" Yang snapped. "She's my mom! I can't just pretend she doesn't exist!"

"Why not? Isn't that what she did to you?" Sable jumped up from his seat. "She's met you once. Once! Even I probably know you better! So what does it matter how she feels, huh?" He flicked her forehead again. "Why are you letting her mess with with your head like that?"

"She's still family! That has to count for something, right?" Yang tried to articulate exactly why. "I mean, I got, like, half my genes from her. We pretty much have the same face. I was in her belly for nine months, and I, um...came out of her...hole?" Okay, surprisingly difficult. Normal people just took for granted that moms were special, somehow. Then again, normal was not the first word she would use to describe her team leader, or the second, or the hundredth.

Sable rolled his eyes. "Yang, we share 99% of our genes with monkeys, or something. Do you care a monkey thinks of you? Yeah, I know, parents are supposed to hug you and read you bedtime stories and that stuff." His voice turned quiet and bitter. "But take it from me, it doesn't always work like that. Sometimes they're not worth the trouble. Sometimes you're better off without them."

"Your dad?" Yang whispered without thinking. Sable flinched so badly that she instinctively grabbed him by the wrist, for fear he would run off. "Shit, sorry! I just—look, you barely ever talk about your parents, but..." She thought back to the story he'd told the day of the food fight, to how the twins had chosen to live at school over the break rather than return home. "...I'm getting the impression things aren't great." She half-expected him to throw a punch, maybe even a fireball, but he grudgingly sat back down. For a minute, there was no sound but the fountain bubbling. "Your impression is accurate." he finally said. "We lived in the same house, but honestly, he might as well have left when I was born."

Welp, it had been a semester and a half. Yang figured they were about due for some backstory. "What did he do?" she asked, pressing her luck. "If you don't mind me asking."

"Nothing." he answered. "Literally nothing. Winter—our older sister—was heiress at first, then Weiss, and I guess he didn't have much use for me. It was Winter who taught me to fight. Not like he could. He's about as athletic as a scarecrow, doesn't even have Aura..." Yang cast a critical eye at Sable's own rather waifish physique, but held her tongue. "And we had servants for everything else. Because why would he want to see me when he could pay someone else to?" Oh, right, rich people. Well, at least this neglectful parent had paid child support, not that it wasn't still six shades of messed up. "I'm sorry." she whispered. It was odd, how their situations were almost reversed. Yang had wondered if her absent mother really loved her, while Sable had grown up with a father he was certain did not. Though at least she'd had another parent to make up for it... "Wait, what about your mom? What did she make of all that?"

"I don't want to talk about her!" Sable snapped. Two seconds later, he proceeded to talk about her anyways. "She tried at first, I'll give her that. But, well...things happened, and now she's barely there at all. Sometimes I wonder she even thinks of me as her son anymore. Or only his." Yang gave him a confused look. "Right, you wouldn't know. The Schnee name comes from our mother. When he married in...he changed his name, his clothes, even his hair. I'm convinced he dyes it." Sable snorted. "But before that, he was Jacques Gelé, and he had hair just like this." He tossed his head, sending pitch-black strands flying about. "I swear, he's never forgiven me for ruining his perfect white family."

"Sorry again." She was starting to feel like a broken record. Was anyone seriously petty enough to reject their child for having the wrong hair color? Come to think, Yang was blonde while Raven had dark hair; if that was what it came down to, she was going to be (even more) pissed. "Wait, you wonder...? What happened to your advice?" A beat late, she realized what had been confusing her. "Guess it's not so easy to stop thinking about your mom, huh?"

Sable practically choked on his own spit. "I—I do fine normally, all right? It's only because you asked—damn it! Damn it!" He slammed both hands over his face. "I'm sorry, Yang. I'm supposed to be helping, and here I am bitching about hair and having servants and shit—" He froze mid-sentence. Yang blinked, realizing her arms had somehow wrapped around him, in the same way she did for Ruby whenever her little sister got upset. Oh boy. She was glad her big sister routine only involved a hug and not a kiss; now that would've been super awkward. "Um, it's okay!" She pulled back, but kept a hand on his shoulder. "Sounds like you had a lot to bitch about. I'm...really sorry to hear all that."

"Stop saying that." Sable mumbled. "It's stupid. Not like they starved me or, I don't know, cut off my legs—I shouldn't be..." One eye peeked out through a gap in his fingers. "Look, I don't need you to feel—"

This time, Yang flicked him. Payback was fair game. Sable yelped, nearly falling into the fountain before she steadied him. "Whoops. Too hard?" He glared balefully at her, rubbing the red mark on his forehead. "You're wrong, though. I'm sorry, but I don't feel sorry for you, if that makes sense. Do you feel sorry for me, now that you know?" Sable shook his head vehemently. "Good." she sighed. Despite not moving a step, she felt drained, as if they'd just gone twelve rounds in the ring. "And...thank you."

He narrowed his eyes, perhaps suspecting he was being made fun of. "For what? I was useless!"

"You, uh, you're not really the type to go around telling your life story, are you?" Sable groaned in embarrassment, while Yang patted him on the back. "But I, um, I'm glad you trusted me. Seriously. Welcome to the Abandoned Children's Club, or whatever." Silence. Damn it, was that the wrong spot for a joke? This touchy-feely shit was harder than it looked on TV. "Welp, good talk." She stood back up, stretching her legs, and held out a hand. "Are you just gonna sit there, looking all broody? It's not like you."

He snorted and let Yang pull him to his feet. "The Abandoned Children's Club, really? That's not even a pun!" A loud caw made them both whirl around. A black bird strutted across the courtyard, watching them with beady eyes. "Qrow! You piece of shit!" Sable shouted, drawing his sword. Huh. Yang was no ornithologist, but on closer look, it seemed a smidge larger than Qrow's crow, and its cry had sounded deeper. "Um...I think that's a normal bird you're yelling at." she suggested.

"Don't play dumb!" Sable ignored her and continued to advance. The bird seemed remarkably relaxed about the tall, angry human pointing a sharp weapon at it. "You think I won't stab you, just because you're a bird?"

"Oi, Firecracker! There you are!" Speak of the devil. Yang's uncle and father walked out from around a corner. Taiyang Xiao Long's eyes widened; he ran up immediately and wrapped her in a hug. "...and you too, great." Qrow complained at the sight of Sable. "Thought I recognized that screaming."

Yang heard the sound of flapping wings, and when Dad let her go, the bird was gone. Sable looked between Qrow and the spot it had been, eyes practically blank with shock. "Hello? Anyone home?" Qrow rapped his knuckles against the boy's head. "For fuck's sake, kid, not every bird is me. When I want to see my family, I do it face to face! Like a normal person!" Yang thought she heard another muffled caw in the distance, but maybe it was her imagination. "I'm sorry." Dad whispered in her ear. "Qrow told me you met her. I know...it must have been hard." He put a hand on her shoulder; she could feel it trembling. "I can—we can talk about it now, if you want—"

"When you're ready." she whispered back. "What's a little more waiting, huh?" Dad stepped back, looking surprised but grateful. "Thank you." he said, smiling. "Well, well. My sunny little dragon is finally learning patience, huh?"

"Dad!" Yang cringed at the stupid old nickname. "Oh my gods! Did you stick around just to drop that on me?"

Dad chuckled. "Sort of. I also had, let's say, a nice chat with your headmaster. Had a couple things to get off my chest, but it's all settled now." His smile turned slightly dark. "I'll be heading back to Patch tonight, but I can spare a few hours. What do you say we find Ruby and your friends, and grab some dinner? I didn't get a chance to talk to them earlier..." He looked over to Sable, who was now yelling at Qrow about something or other. "...but they seem like an interesting bunch."

Yang's stomach growled. "Sure. Just don't call me that in front of everyone. Please?" she pleaded. "And don't worry. The others are are a lot more, uh, sane." They began walking back towards the dorms. A loud splash came from behind, followed by Qrow cursing. "What? A puddle?" Her uncle poured water out of his shoe, scowling. "Oh, for—what the hell did you do to the fountain?!"

"Um...it was like that when I got here."

What a day, Cinder thought, what a fucking day. She and her three "teammates" were huddled in one of Roman's safe houses, looking more like students cramming for an exam than future rulers of the world. She rested a cup of instant noodles in the palm of her hand. Her Semblance brought it to a boil in seconds, and she eagerly slurped it down. It was lucky that Neo had been able to make it out. Who knew the Mountain Glenn tunnel connected to the Vale sewer system? After several incredibly disgusting hours, Emerald and Mercury had gotten Neo into a presentable state, and the mute had written an account of the literal trainwreck. They'd spent the rest of the day scrambling to get more information, and figure out how much of the plan was still intact. Only one loose end remained now. Cinder set up her Scroll on the nicest-looking table in the room; Emerald and Mercury stared at it as if it were a live hand grenade. "Do you have to do this now?" Emerald said fearfully.

"Yeah, and why us? Shouldn't Neo be explaining this?" Mercury asked. All three women looked at him like he was an idiot. "Oh, right."

"Better that he hears it from me. You two just stand in the background. I'll do the talking." Cinder ordered. Her minions moved into position. "Neo, you're dismissed. Make sure Roman gets the message." The asymmetrical girl picked up her parasol and vanished ("I told you she could teleport!" said Mercury). Cinder chugged another cup of coffee to brace herself, and pressed the call button. A nightmarish visage appeared on the third ring, a faceless white mask with slits for eyes and ornate red swirls like a Beowolf's. Perhaps it would've intimidated a regular person, but to her, it was no scarier than a child's Halloween costume. Her boss was the real thing, after all. A mop of blood-red hair and two small horns poked out above. "Fall." Adam Taurus grunted. "What do you want?"

Cinder plastered a pleasant smile onto her face. "Good evening, Adam. Appreciate you making the time. Did you watch VNN today, by any chance?"

Adam scoffed at mention of the mainstream media. "I've got better things to do than watch human propaganda. Why do you ask?"

"You remember the Vale Breach that was supposed to happen in a few days, right?"

"Of course I remember! I'm not a damn goldfish!" the faunus snapped. "Wait, was supposed to?"

Cinder took a deep breath, preparing to tell the entire story in one go. "Well, it seems that early this morning Huntsmen discovered the base in Mountain Glenn, and they had to start the train early, and unfortunately it didn't make it the whole way through, and the Grimm are stuck behind a wall in the Residential District now." Adam's mouth opened and closed a couple times. She preemptively turned down the volume on her Scroll. "WHAT?!" Ow, her ears. Cinder turned the volume down even more. "There was supposed to be a kaboom! A city-shattering kaboom! A fucking third of our Vale branch, just for that?! Where the fuck is Torchwick?" he demanded. "I'll rip his heart out! Tear him limb from limb! Unless he's dead already, then I'll, um...I'll DO IT TO HIS CORPSE!"

"Adam! Calm yourself!" Cinder said sharply. "The plan survives. You really think I'd risk everything on Roman Torchwick's competence?" She summoned a fireball in each hand for dramatic effect. "We never planned to take down Vale in one night, remember. Your soldiers knew that. They knew they would most likely die, but that they would be the martyrs we built our new world on!" That was a lie, of course. Most of them had been cannon fodder Roman pulled off the street, drawn in by the promise of parties and free kitchen appliances. "Give up now, and their sacrifice will be in vain. The ones who killed them will get away scot-free." He gritted his teeth and snorted, like an actual bull. She leaned in to twist the knife more. "My sources tell me your traitor was there, Adam. The Schnee children too."

Adam's hand flew up, rubbing his left eye over the mask. How strange. "Blake would never...!" he choked out. "Damn it! How could she work with human scum like that?" Cinder heard Mercury snickering behind her. She pressed a heated palm against his leg, upon which he gulped and went quiet. They patiently waited for Adam to stop freaking out about his ex-girlfriend. "The White Fang will not run from a fight." he finally snarled. "Not while I'm in charge. But what about your end of the bargain, Fall? The breach plan was a bust! Will Ironwood even send in his fleet now?"

"It was not." Cinder said smoothly. "The important thing isn't what happened, it's what could have. The people at the top know, and soon everyone else will too. Ozpin and the Council can lie all they want, but people will hear the Grimm growling behind that wall and know the truth. And while we may have lost a few cards from our hand..." In her mind's eye, she placed a few Atlesian robots into the imaginary discard pile. To replace them, she drew a stack of Grimm, and played them in the middle of the city. "...we've gained some as well."

Welp. I thought this chapter was going to be on the shorter side, but nope. That's what I get for not keeping the main cast at 4.

That Yang scene...oof. Writing that was suffering, more than anything else so far, and honestly I don't know if it's good or just cringe. Guess we'll find out in the reviews!

Anyways I better go plan out the tournament arc, and quit writing by the seat of my oversized clown pants. Later!

OMAKE: SJBY CHIBI?

JAUNE: AAHH! Why the hell is my head so big now? And my body so small?

BLAKE: (stoic) Calm down, Jaune. We're clearly in a non-canon segment that deforms our bodies for humorous effect.

JAUNE: How is this funny? (attempts to reach up) I can't even touch my eyebrows!

YANG: Yeah, I'm with him. (looks at her right arm) I...don't like the idea of the author messing with our body parts.

SABLE: Um, Yang, you're supposed to do something funny. Not just complain about bad shit happening to your canon self—

BLAKE: Break the fourth wall all you want, Yang. He's just bitter that he's not canon.

SABLE: Hey!

WEISS: (enters) Oh, are we breaking the fourth wall now? Can...can you believe this guy just stole my big summoning scene?

SABLE: Hey, to be fair, did you ever interact with Velvet before that?

PYRRHA: (running in) Oh, you think you've got it bad? I'm, like, not even a main character anymore! I've lost my team! My partner! My boyfriend! Well...kind of.

JAUNE: Wait, who's your boyfriend?

BLAKE: I know, right? He's stealing my girlfriend too! What a jerk!

YANG: Wait, who's your girlfriend?

BLAKE: And I lost my other love interest to a robot! A fucking robot!

PYRRHA: Next volume, they're probably gonna make him the Fall Maiden instead! Somehow!

YANG: Uh, Pyrrha, that might not be a bad thing, considering, you know. (mimes being stabbed in the heart)

SABLE: Shut up! What have you got to complain about? I'm not even real!

JAUNE: Uh, technically none of us are—

SABLE: You know what I mean! You guys are all like, celebrities, and I only exist in this dumb shitty fanfic!

Hey!

YANG: Who the fuck is this asshole?

BLAKE: Oh gods, I hate it when authors start talking to the characters. It's so pathetic...

You know I control what happens to you, right?

WEISS: Pfft, like I care what happens in a story with less than 200 favorites. The real me is just fine. Um, no offense Pyrrha.

PYRRHA: (sniffling) At least I have all those Arkos fics.

SABLE: Seriously, get lost. Shouldn't you be writing the actual story, not this self-insert bullshit?

You realize there's only one of you, right?

BLAKE: Oh, please. As if you'd let anything bad happen to your wish-fulfillment character.

I mean, if I ever get tired of writing this...

SABLE: Wait, what?!

Do you believe in destiny, Sable?

PYRRHA: Uh-oh.

(color bars)