Chapter 133: Loss

In the attic Paige and Dawn are in tears as Dawn flips through hers and Buffy's Book of Shadows, well just hers now. They are surrounded by herb jars, chalices and other ritualistic items.

"Hear now the words of the witches, the secrets we hid in the night. The oldest of Gods are invoked here, the great magic is sought." Dawn says as a candle flickers. "In this night and in this hour, I call upon the ancient power." She looks up and closes her eyes. "Bring back my sister. Bring back the Power of Four."

Dawn keeps her eyes closed for a prayerful beat, and then she opens them, looks at the candle, but sees nothing.

Paige starts flipping through pages until she finds another spell, To Call a Lost Witch. Dawn finds and mixes rosemary, cypress and yarrow root into a silver bowl as Paige chants from the book. "Power of the witches' rise. Course unseen across the skies. Come to us, we call you near. Come to us and settle here."

Then, Dawn finds an athame and slices the left finger of her left hand so that blood can symbolically spill directly from her heart and into the bowl. "Blood to blood, I summon thee. Blood to blood, return to me."

A faint gust of wind flickers the candle, but not much else. Dawn buries her face in her hands in defeat.

"Dawn? Paige?"

Paige and Dawn look up, hopeful. "Buffy?" Dawn says.

They look at the candle as Piper enters, wearing her nightclothes. "Sweeties, it's 2 o'clock in the morning. What are you two doing?" Dawn doesn't answer, just stares blankly at the book. Piper notices Dawn's bleeding and gets a towel. "You're bleeding."

Dawn doesn't notice, doesn't care. Piper finds a clean cloth, takes Dawn's hand and wraps the wound.

"I don't understand why magic can't fix this. And why we can't bring Buffy back. It's not like she hasn't cheated death before, she did die three times and came back each time. I don't understand why this time isn't any different." Dawn says.

Piper sighs, "Because she's not meant to Dawn. Remember when Buffy and I tried to bring Prue back." Dawn nods. "We couldn't do it then either. And when we talked to Grams she told us we weren't allowed to see her yet either."

"I don't understand this. Is this what it was like for you all when you lost Prue?" Paige asks as she wipes tears from her face.

Piper sighs and nods. She reaches across and closes Dawn's Book of Shadows. She then helps Dawn and Paige to stand and they make their way out of the attic and down the stairs.

If Piper, Paige and Dawn had stayed in the attic they would have noticed a gust of wind that reopened Dawn's Book of Shadows and turned it to the very last page in the book and to the words that were written on it in Joyce's handwriting.

"I am so sorry, my daughter."

The next day at the funeral home Piper moves through a darkened room full of coffins. She stops in front of one…

Harsh fluorescent overheads wash the room in sickly yellow light. Piper starts as she sees Phoebe and Paige at the doorway.

"Piper. There you are…" Phoebe says as she enters, followed shortly by Paige, Dawn, Giles and a funeral director.

"Are you alright?" Giles asks.

Piper wipes a tear from her eye. Twice now she has lost someone close to her. She looks at a casket, "Yeah. I…"

"Did you find something?" the Funeral director asks.

Piper nods and points, "That one."

"That model is beautiful. In fact, all of the caskets in this room are top of the line. However, given your budget, it might not be the-" Before the funeral director Evan gets the words out of his mouth, Giles raises a hand and stops him, silently indicating that he will take care of it. "It's a fine choice. It speaks to your deep feeling for the deceased."

Piper is about to move off but notices that Dawn is hesitating. Looking uncertainly at the coffin of choice. "You don't like it?"

Dawn shakes her head, "It's not that. It's just - what if Buffy… What if she'd like something else better?"

"Dawn-" Piper says.

Dawn sighs, "I mean, how do we know? For sure? She's the one who has to be in it forever."

Piper can't think about it this way. It hurts too much. She ends the discussion. Not unkindly, but on no uncertain terms. "Dawn. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea, you coming along…"

"It's fine. It's just-" Dawn says.

Piper nods, "I'm serious. You shouldn't have to deal with this stuff-"

"If you'd like a few more minutes to decide-" the Funeral Director asks.

Piper shakes her head, "No. It's fine." She looks to Dawn, "Okay?"

Dawn nods.

Piper moves off followed by Giles and the funeral director. "Okay…"

Phoebe and Paige move over to Dawn and pull her into a group embrace.

That evening at the Manor Piper and Phoebe sit at one end of the dining room table going over paperwork and reviewing Buffy's funeral arrangements. At the other end of the table Paige and Leo sits with Dawn, Wyatt and Celia. Paige is feeding Celia while Leo is feeding Wyatt. Dawn is just sitting there, her food untouched.

"I checked prices with a few different florists. The funeral home is competitive." Phoebe says.

Piper nods, "Let's just go with them, then. It's simpler."

"What color flowers?" Dawn asks.

"White. They're nice." Piper says as she looks to Phoebe, "What about an announcement? People are going to be expecting a memorial after the burial if we don't say something."

Phoebe nods, "We could put a line in the program. Expressing Buffy's preference not to have one."

"There's no memorial?" Paige asks.

Piper shakes her head, "After Prue's funeral Buffy said she didn't want one."

"I didn't know that." Dawn says remembering Prue's funeral. "Are we going with a Priestess like we did with Prue?"

Piper nods, "Yes."

Dawn nods, "What about the Mausoleum?"

Piper shakes her head, "Buffy didn't want to be buried in the Mausoleum. She said and I quote, 'I want to lie back and look up at the stars.'"

"That's nice. She actually said that?" Dawn asks, smiling.

Piper smiles and nods, "Yes."

"You better get working on that dinner. You've barely touched it." Paige says.

Dawn sighs, "I'm not feeling very casserole-y."

"Shouldn't stop you. Eating can provide pleasant numbness." Paige says.

"You should eat, Dawn." Piper says.

Dawn sighs and looks at her eldest cousin and then nods as she takes a bite.

The next morning Piper is in her room, the scene is eerily reminiscent of the day of Prue's funeral two years before. Piper is only half dressed and combing her hair.

Leo eases open the door and enters. "Piper?" She doesn't react, just keeps brushing. Leo approaches her. "Piper, we have to go."

"I don't want to go." Piper says.

Leo sighs remembering Prue's funeral how neither Piper nor Buffy wanted to go then either. He kneels down next to her, "Why not?"

Piper looks at Leo. "Because if I go, that'll mean that Buffy's really not coming back, and I don't know if I can handle that again. I've already lost Prue…"

Leo sighs and nods in understanding, "It'll be okay, Piper. Just like it was after Prue died."

"How can you say that? I've lost two members of this family in the space of two years." Piper says.

Leo sighs and holds Piper close to him, comforting her, the best he can.

In Dawn's room she's not quite alone, unlike Piper she is dressed. She's sitting on her bed, her expression sorrowful. In her lap is Celia. She just sits their holding her niece, her goddaughter, her link to Buffy.

Later at the cemetery. A beautiful ivory-colored coffin sits on a pedestal amongst flowers. An ivory-dressed, Wiccan Priestess stands before a blue silk covered altar table, which is adorned with a ceremonial chalice. A tied, silver cord lays before the chalice, three lit candles surround it, symbolizing birth, death, and the rebirth. Dawn (Celia's in her lap), Piper (Wyatt's in her lap), Phoebe, Paige, Leo, and Victor are seated close to the priestess. Dawn, Paige, Piper and Phoebe dab at their eyes.

At the very back of the assembled group stood Hank. He had been filled in by Dawn, with Piper's blessing, on Buffy's life and death, about her being a Slayer and being Charmed. He couldn't have been more proud of his daughter.

"That which belongs to fellowship and love. That which belongs to the circle, remains with us. The wheel turns. As life is a day, so our sister has passed into night. Nothing is final, and we who remain behind know that one day, we will once again share the bread and wine with our sister. O' blessed spirit, we bid you farewell, for you await a new destiny." The Priestess says as she unties the silver cord and gently lays it into the chalice. She then blows out the candles.

Giles goes over to Dawn, Piper, Paige and Phoebe to hug them; he kisses Celia on her forehead. He is followed by Willow, Tara, Xander and Anya who also hug the sisters and Dawn. Angel would be by later that evening after the sun went down to pay his respects.

After everyone else has left Piper, Phoebe, Paige and Dawn stand looking at the tombstone as they mourn for the loss of another member of their family.

PAYSON (BUFFY) PATRICIA HALLIWELL

1981-2001

BELOVED MOTHER, SISTER and COUSIN

DEVOTED FRIEND

THE POWER OF FOUR WILL SET YOU FREE

A few days after the funeral in the Los Angeles County Jail, Willow is visiting her sister.

"Hey Hope. Where's Buffy I thought you two were coming together?" Faith asked.

Willow looks down not wanting to meet her sister's eyes.

Faith could tell just from the sad expression on Willow's face that something bad had happened, "What happened?"

"Buffy's dead." Willow said.

Faith's jaw dropped, that meant she was now the only Slayer, "How?"

"She died protecting her sister." Willow said as she looked up and into Faith's eyes. "She died protecting Dawn." She went on to tell Faith about Dawn being the Key and how Buffy had come to make the choice that she would die so her sister could live.

Author's Note: As you see this chapter is an amalgamation of several episodes in both BTVS and Charmed. There are two scenes from Charmed Again. One Scene from Forever and the tombstone (modified) from The Gift.

I thought I would send out this one also today. See what folks though of Buffy's funeral. The next chapter will be Bargaining Pt. 1 which takes place 3 months after this chapter.