I'm back! I'm finishing this story - and some of my others - after 3 years! I have some other stories in mind too. Hope I still have some followers :)

Even though only one of us is technically family, we all stand up. I have to swallow a wave of nausea that hits me as soon as I stand. I consider myself talented when it comes to reading people. And this doctor does not look like he's about to deliver good news.

The doctor actually asks us to sit down and joins us, removing his scrub cap. I don't know if this is good or bad. He introduces himself but I couldn't tell you his name. My heart is beating so rapidly that it echoes in my ears and it's all I hear.

"I'm happy to say she made it through surgery," he says.

I let out the breath I didn't know I was holding. This is good news, but from his expression and the fact he asked us to sit down, I know there's more to it.

Olivia is holding Casey's mother's hand and they both have relived tears in their eyes.

"However," the doctor says, clearing his throat. "She's not out of the woods. She's going to need further operations but we did all her body could handle for now. The bullet punctured the lining of her stomach and we are confident we stopped the internal bleeding...at least for now. We are going to need to do another MRI as soon as she's well enough to handle it to see how the repair holds up." He leans forward in his chair.

"That's the least severe of her injuries. My concern is that there is a bullet lodged in her heart, causing irregular rhythms. We are unable to remove the bullet at this time."

"What are the dangers of that?" her mom asks. "Can she live that way?"

The doctor minces no words. "Not for very long, no. The main danger is that it can migrate at any time. Her heart is already working too hard. She could have a major heart attack at any time."

Casey's mother begins to cry and I close my eyes and then open them again. "So what are you doing about it? How can you save her?" I'm aware that my tone is coming across as harsh but I don't even attempt to adjust it.

"We have a cardiologist coming from New Jersey. He has worked on similar cases. He and his team are very experienced. She will be in good hands, I promise you all. We just have to hope she stays stable until they arrive tomorrow afternoon." He turns his attention to Casey's mom.

"However, I must inform you that insurance does not usually cover a procedure of the magnitude that she's going to require."

I almost start laughing; of course he would bring this up now. As if Casey's Mom needs anything else to worry about.

"It doesn't matter," I tell him sternly. "Bill me. I'll pay for anything she needs."

Everyone looks at me and I can feel their collective shock but I don't care. I'm not concerned with money or cost. I'm concerned with doing what is necessary to save Casey's life.

The doctor discusses Casey's condition with us a bit longer and then let's Casey's mother know that she can see her daughter as soon as she wakes up in recovery.

I hadn't even thought about visiting Casey, but now it's on my mind.

Should I visit her? Would she want to see me? Will she even remember what happened?

I consider myself a strong person. Not much scares me. But the idea of seeing Casey chills me to the bone. I don't know if I could handle it. I'll do whatever I can to help, but...I don't think I can face her right now.

Casey's mother finally gets to go see Casey, and Olivia and Amanda are kind enough to agree to go walk her dog and then transport her to my apartment.

I've been so wrapped up in my thoughts and emotions that I didn't even notice the presence of Jack McCoy. He's talking to Nick, and he looks genuinely concerned. He runs his hand through his hair and, for the first time since I have known him, appears anything but composed. I can only imagine what I look like. Alex Cabot, the poster of professionalism and composure, sitting in a plastic chair in green hospital scrubs scared to death.

Jack comes to me and placed a hand on my shoulder. He looks me in the eyes and says, "I'm very sorry, Alex. Are you okay?"

I can only nod. I feel like if I speak I will begin to cry, and I can't let anyone see that side of me. Not here and not now.

"Take a couple days off. When you feel ready to return we will discuss you taking Casey's job in the interim."

Well congratulations, Alex. You got the job you wanted.

Look what it cost you.

Somehow I managed to fall asleep. I don't remember coming home or climbing into my bed, but my cell phone ringing from the night stand pulls me from my troubled slumber and brings me back to reality.

I scramble for my iPhone, nearly dropping it as I look to see who is calling. It's Olivia.

"Olivia?" my voice is hoarse and laced with sleep.

"Alex...I'm so sorry to have to wake you. I know it's late."

I pull the phone away from my ear and look at the time. Four AM. My heart catches in my throat; if she's calling at this late hour, it can't be good.

My fears are confirmed when she takes a deep breath and says, "I'm afraid I have some bad news..."