~Wavering Destiny~
by Strawberry Moon Rose

Well, here I am! I didn't give up on this story, nor did I fall off the face of the Earth. (Or Kinmoku for that matter.)

As announced on my profile page, my laptop broke. The hardrive fried and I lost pretty much everything T_T I wrote most of this chapter pecking away with two fingers on my iPad, but it was near impossible. My 90 wpm went to 5 wpm. And with school just starting, homework, work, and me being sick, this chapter became incredibly late. I apologize D:

On the bright side, I do have good news; my laptop is fixed now. I can hopefully return to normal once a week updates ^_^

Enjoy :)

Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or any of the characters. They belong to Naoko Takeuchi.

Chapter 41: Fate Comes A-Knocking

Usagi filled her lungs with the lilac and olive fragrance of Seiya's sheets and she slipped under the comforter. Somehow, sleeping with Minako for the past week while she stayed at her house just wasn't the same.

The sheets ruffled and the blankets shifted. Usagi could hear her breathing over the sound of rain, and she knew Seiya was close. She could feel her body heat radiating inches away and she could smell her freshly shampooed hair. But she still felt alone.

"Touch me," Usagi whispered.

Skin met skin. Under the cottony comforter, their bare legs brushed against each others. Seiya's legs were smooth and warm, like rose petals under a hot, summer sun.

The blonde snuggled in until their stomachs touched. Under the silk of her nightgown, she could feel every breath Seiya took. Inhale... Exhale... Rise... Fall... The Starlight's rhythm was music. The intimacy calmed her in indescribable ways.

"Does the storm bother you?" asked Seiya.

"A little. But it's not so bad 'cause you're with me."

"I'm glad."

"Hey, Seiya..."

"What is it?"

Usagi wished she could see her. She longed to admire her face, cast in silvery moonlight, and her unkempt hair shimmering blue under the stars. She wanted to see her lips, open ever-so-slightly as if taunting her like a chocolate cupcake, and her long, black eyelashes swishing up every time she blinked. But it was too dark to make anything out.

Ironically, as if the storm heard her thoughts, it offered a brilliant, flash of lightning that illuminated the bedroom for a fraction of a second. Usagi took a mental picture of Seiya, knowing she'd hold onto it for the rest of the night.

God, she was gorgeous.

Usagi reached up and touched her face. Blindly, she trailed her fingers across her skin, outlining each contour of her features.

She started at the Starlight's high cheekbones and moved across the bridge of her nose. She felt along her forehead, drifting down the side of her face again, to her chin. Her fingers lingered around her mouth. Mustering the bravery to touch Seiya's lips, she took her time drawing imaginary lines around the heart-shaped pair.

Full and smooth, they were damp and warm as she breathed. All Usagi could think of was pressing her own mouth against them. She desperately wanted to taste her.

Seiya puckered her lips out playfully under her index finger.

Usagi giggled and pulled her hand away. Moving it up behind Seiya's crescent-shaped earring, she raked her fingers into the Starlight's silky, undone hair. Pulling her body up so they were face to face, she leaned in and kissed her on the lips.

Usagi could feel Seiya's legs tense up against hers and her chest stop breathing for a couple beats. Smiling, Usagi pulled away, detaching their lips with a soft kissing sound. She loved that after everything, she still could amaze her.

Finally, Seiya broke out into the tiniest, shyest smile. "You're always full of surprises, aren't you, Bun Head?" she murmured, pleasantly dazed.

"Always?" Usagi teased. "In what ways have I surprised you, Seiya?" she asked curiously. She didn't think of herself as a real surprising person. She was fairly predictable, simple, and a tad bit gullible. But if Seiya, who was always mysterious and sexy, thought so, it had to count for something, right?

"You never fail to surprise me. So many times..."

"Oh, really?"

Seiya absentmindedly played with a blonde curl around Usagi's face. For as much as she loved her trademark hairstyle, she thought she was beautiful with her hair down, almost like Rapunzel.

"I was pretty shocked when I found out you were Sailor Moon," Seiya offered.

"For as much as you teased me about my hair, I can't believe you didn't notice we had that in common."

Seiya rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well, that doesn't count, you looked different."

"Okay, fair enough. What else?"

"Well, it surprised me that you didn't recognize me the first time we talked in the park. I mean, I was pretty popular - everyone knew me. And when you did find out who I was, you treated me like a person instead of somebody famous. I didn't know what to think of that. I was shocked that no matter what I tried, I could never impress you like all the other girls."

Usagi snorted. "Yeah, well, sorry if I bruised your ego."

Seiya laughed. "Apology accepted. Oh, and probably what I found most surprising about you is how much food your stomach can hold. I didn't think it was possible for a girl to have that kind of appetite. How many of those kabobs did you down on our date, anyways? Ten?"

"Hey! Those things were delicious!"

"I could tell." Seiya smiled at the distant memory. They'd walked around all day eating cotton candy, riding roller coasters, and screaming over creepy paintings in one of the funhouses. Everything seemed so carefree and fun back then.

At least for a little while, until Sailor Iron Mouse showed up and ruined the rest of their date. It seemed like sailor guardian stuff always got between them. Back then, and now. It was just a different time and place, but the same old song and dance.

"Seiya? Something wrong?"

"Huh?" Seiya shook away the memories, unaware she had spaced out. "Oh, nothing. I was just...thinking."

"About what?"

Everything. Seiya sucked in a breath of air. "Um, Bun Head?"

"Yes?"

"I've been wondering for a while now about something, but..."

"You can ask me anything," Usagi whispered encouragingly.

She swallowed. Seiya felt as nervous as she had when she was trying to tell Usagi she was Sailor Star Fighter at her house. She stumbled on her own words and blinked several times faster than usual. She hadn't wanted there to be secrets between them and she didn't want there to be any now. Secrets created distance. And there was a big one discovered recently that was putting miles between them.

"What's Chibi-Usa like?" she asked.

The room fell silent.

Usagi sucked in a sharp breath of air. Seiya bit down hard on her lip and resisted the urge to fidget with the comforter.

Usagi had never really talked about Chibi-Usa with Seiya before. It seemed like a touchy subject for everyone. She told the four of them what she had to about the future and time travel, but Seiya knew nothing about her as a person. She didn't even know what Chibi-Usa looked like. She deserved to know that much.

A memory of the smiling preteen flashed in her mind. Usagi closed her eyes and took a deep breath before answering.

"She's Hotaru's age and is pretty short. She looks just like me, but she's got crimson eyes and pink hair."

"Pink?"

"Yes, pink." Usagi smiled weakly.

Seiya furrowed her brows. "But you have blonde hair and Mamoru has black, right? How do you get pink out of that?" Her tone was light, playful. She didn't want Usagi to get sad talking about her daughter that was on the verge of disappearing.

Usagi swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. "I'm not really sure how all that works." Nobody had ever given it much thought before. Leave it to Seiya to notice something like that.

"If it is, I bet it's from you. Pink seems to be your color." Seiya paused. "Wait a second - don't tell me... If she looks just like you, does she wear her hair in Bun Heads too?"

"Yes, she does. But they're a little bigger and cone-shaped."

"What? You're kidding me! I suppose I'll have to call her Chibi Bun Head then."

"Seiya!" Usagi snickered.

"What? That makes sense, doesn't it? Chibi-Bun Head... I like the sound of it already!"

"I bet Chibi-Usa would just love that," she said sarcastically.

"If she's anything like you, then I know she will."

Usagi giggled.

Seiya thought back to her day as a police officer on Earth. How she found Chibi Chibi and jokingly asked Usagi if she was her daughter because of their resemblance. Usagi's strange reaction now made sense considering she already had one daughter in the future.

"So what else? Do you two share the same coordination skills and appetites too?" Seiya playfully poked Usagi's stomach with her finger.

"Hey!" She squirmed and laughed, swatting Seiya's hand away. "Sorta, but she's more graceful than I am. She gets that from Mamo. She's also a really good drawer and painter, unlike me, and gets better grades in school than I ever did. But she loves sweets like I do."

"Like Chibi Chibi?"

Usagi paused to recall the adorable toddler with red, heart-shaped Bun Heads and big blue eyes. Usagi remembered the look on Seiya's face when she told her she'd been hoping Chibi Chibi would lead them to a house of sweets.

"Kind of. But Chibi Chibi was much sweeter than Chibi-Usa. It's a shame those two never met. I love Chibi-Usa, even though she gets on my nerves sometimes."

"Like me?" Seiya joked.

"Yes, like you, Seiya. I think you and Chibi-Usa would get along well."

Seiya snuggled in more so their foreheads touched. She moved her leg over Usagi's, unintentionally easing her nightgown up higher with her thigh. Usagi's heart did two and a half somersaults off the high dive and landed in her stomach.

"Even though we haven't met, I think I'd like her too," Seiya whispered softly. "I really want to meet her someday. Do you think I can?"

"Seiya..." Usagi swallowed. "Really? Do you...mean that?"

"Of course. What makes you think I wouldn't, silly?"

Usagi squirmed a bit in her arms. "It's just... She's me and Mamo's kid. I can't imagine that he's your favorite person in the world. Plus, she's what's keeping us from being together. I'd understand if you don't like her for a lot of reasons."

"Bun Head, that's crazy. She's a part of you. Of course I'm going to adore her. Besides, Mamoru and I probably have more in common that we'd like to think. But you're right, he's not my biggest fan and I'm not his either."

"I'm so sorry, Seiya, for putting you in this position. It must be so weird." She couldn't even imagine how jealous and hurt she'd feel if she suddenly found out Seiya had a daughter with another man. Her eyes prickled.

The fact that the Starlight was so kind and accepting about it all hurt even more. 'I really want to meet her someday. Do you think I can?'

Usagi's teeth gnashed together in frustration. Why? Why isn't she upset? I know I would be... I don't deserve someone as good as Seiya.

A teardrop trickled out. Usagi turned her head away, suddenly aware of the thunder outside and concrete darkness around them.

"Hey, Bun Head, don't cry," Seiya said soothingly, drying her tears with the brush of a hand. "It's okay. I told you, I'm fine with it. Really. Besides, it's not your fault. I know you didn't ask for any of this to happen."

"I know, Seiya, but..." Usagi sniffled. "I can't help it. What's gonna happen now? What'll we do?"

Seiya was quiet for a moment. She hugged the blonde and massaged her hand in circles on her back. "We could...go back to Earth if you wanted," she suggested, "and talk to the others after we see what Taiki finds. Maybe with some new information we could find a solution."

Usagi remained silent. She took Seiya's hand and tried hard to block out the storm. It boomed so loudly, she could feel the echoes in her ribcage like she was at a firework show.

Seiya was right. Staying on Kinmoku wouldn't save Chibi-Usa. They had to go back. Tomorrow, they could all return to the blue and green planet. But when they got there, what would they do? What else could they possibly come up with that the others hadn't already considered?

Was it...hopeless?

There had to be something obvious they were missing; a piece of information or strange event that nobody had ever questioned before and just overlooked.

Usagi squeezed her eyes shut. What, if anything, had happened that could possibly help her out in a situation like this? She thought hard, but drew a blank. She wanted to believe that in the end, fate couldn't be cruel enough to make her choose between her lover and her daughter, but she wasn't so sure.

Usagi sighed and rolled from her side to her back, staring up at the blackness where the ceiling would be.

"I just want this all to be over with already and everything to be okay," she whispered tiredly, sick of thinking. Her head felt worse than if she'd gone through a hundred of Ami's study sessions straight in a row.

Seiya rested her head on top of Usagi's chest, her ear to her heart. "I do too, Bun Head. I do too..."

She focused on combing Seiya's hair. It was a gesture she loved when Seiya did to her.

In that moment, as Seiya's breathing slowed and she drifted asleep on her chest, Usagi felt oddly blissful. She stroked the side of Seiya's face. How could someone who resembled a fearless prince be so innocent like a princess, asleep in her arms?

Adjusting the blankets over them, Usagi rested her head back onto the pillow. Her eyes drifted shut.

The sound of drizzling rain watering the ground became a melodic lullaby. She could feel herself being swept into dreamland. She welcomed the escape.

There was a legend that if you fell asleep holding your lover's hand, you would share the same dream. Usagi wasn't sure if it was true or not, but she'd always liked to believe it was. She wanted to share beautiful dreams with Seiya.

They would run, hand-in-hand, into the sunset while joyous music blared. Everyone would approve of their relationship and let her do as she pleased. To hell with Crystal Tokyo! They'd create their own utopia. A harmonic world in which Chibi-Usa existed too. A world where everyone could follow their own dreams instead of sacrificing them for her destiny too. It would be a perfect world...

"Seiya! Get up, now!"

Usagi frowned. In her new rosy future, Yaten did not yell. She was a magnified version of the kindheartedness she'd seen when she had spoken with her earlier. Why was her voice filled with such gravel and clamant all of a sudden?

Usagi groaned. Blonde eyebrows knit together, blue eyes slowly peeled open. The bedroom lights were on, harsh and bright. Disorientation clouded her brain and blurred her thoughts. Although she didn't know what time it was, she knew it couldn't be morning yet. She hadn't dreamt long enough. It left her feeling unsatisfied and a bit irritated.

"Yaten... Seriously, what time is it anyways? Get out..." Seiya groaned and stuffed a pillow over her face.

Yaten tore across the room. She was still in her pajamas. An eyemask was pushed up in her side-swept bangs, her hair looking uncharacteristically disheveled.

"You don't understand, Seiya!" Her green eyes were big and a frantic edge wavered in her voice.

"Mmm..." Seiya muffled something incoherent and rolled over.

Usagi pulled herself into a sitting position. 3:21 AM, read the nighstand clock.

Yaten grabbed the blanket at the end of the bed and ripped it off their cuddling bodies.

"Geez, what the hell?" Seiya sat up. Her shorts were wrinkled and the sleeve of her tank top slid down her bare shoulder.

"What's going on?" Usagi asked, suddenly wide awake.

"They're here," Yaten said breathlessly.

"They?" Seiya frowned. "Whose 'they'?"

Usagi's stomach flip flopped.

"Uranus, Neptune... Everyone. They're all here. At the palace."