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Aaaaaaah, sorry for venting, but my doctor wants me to get a biopsy on my thyroid (with a needle thing), and since I have a needle phobia, I can't sit still long enough and I'm gonna have to be drugged so I stay still. I'm just kinda freaking out a bit over the whole thing.

Anyway, here's the next chapter. This takes place directly after the last chapter.

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Virgil hadn't been able to sleep last night, and he was exhausted, but even if he wanted to just say screw it and sleep the rest of the day, he still felt slumber eluding him. It sucked, but it wasn't like Virgil was a stranger to insomnia. His eye shadow wasn't the only reason he had bags under his eyes, after all. But still, it sucked.

It was pretty early in the morning, so the others weren't awake yet. Or, if they were, they just hadn't left their rooms yet. Patton would probably be coming down in a few minutes, though.

After a few hours of unsuccessfully trying to sleep, Virgil had given up and gone to the living room, thinking that, if he wasn't going to be able to sleep, he might as well watch something.

Just as the anxious side had predicted, he soon heard footsteps.

"Hey, Pat," Virgil called out from his spot on the couch.

When he actually turned his head, however, he saw that it wasn't Patton who entered the living room.

It was Janus.

Virgil tensed up at the same time he saw Janus do so. He could see that the other side was clutching a book in his hand, and judging by the surprised expression on Janus's face, the man hadn't expected Virgil to be here. He had probably been intending to read in the living room before everyone was up or something.

Janus pursed his lips before speaking.

"... Good morning, Virgil," the deceitful side spoke evenly.

"Uh… yeah. Morning."

They stared at each other for a moment.

"Well, I suppose I should be going, then."

He felt a quick flash of anxiety coming from the other side. And then Janus started turning around to leave, and Virgil realized that Janus probably thought he wouldn't want him there.

"Deceit, wait."

Janus paused.

"... Yes, Virgil?"

"Dude, you don't have to leave just 'cuz I'm sitting here," he told him. "There's enough room on the couch for two of us."

That's what he said, but deep down, Virgil kind of hoped that Janus would still leave. It wasn't that he was still really all that mad at the other side or that he hated him or anything. He just didn't know what to say around the man or what he should do, and that made him anxious.

Janus turned back around and gave him a look that told him that there was a good chance he knew Virgil wasn't being entirely honest about his feelings. He watched the side silently deliberate with himself for a few seconds before sighing.

"Very well, then."

And then Janus came over and sat down on the couch, not quite as far away from Virgil as he could possibly be, but not close either. Without another word, Janus flipped open his book to a page toward the middle and started reading, though Virgil saw his eyes dart away from looking at him the few times that Virgil turned his own gaze toward Janus.

Well, wasn't this just a barrel of fun?

Virgil sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, making Janus look away from his book again.

Not knowing what to say, Virgil just said the first thing that came to mind.

"Whatcha reading?"

Janus blinked.

"... Basics of Bioethics."

"... Is that a textbook?"

"... No…"

"Oh my god, it is a textbook," Virgil spoke incredulously. "Logan would be proud."

Virgil hadn't meant his words to sound insulting, but he saw Janus bristle.

"What, I can't be interested in learning about something, Virgil?" he questioned defensively.

Now it was Virgil's turn to blink. He probably should have guessed that, even as non-serious as it was, Janus wouldn't have appreciated any light teasing.

"... I wasn't making fun of you, dude," Virgil said sincerely. "I was just trying to make conversation. Logan really would be proud of you for reading it."

Janus's eyes widened once again into a surprised stare likely at the honesty in Virgil's voice.

"...Oh."

"Where'd you even get that, anyway? I'm pretty sure Thomas hasn't read it."

"Well, he doesn't exactly know Spanish, either."

"... True."

"False."

At this, Janus looked away again, having not meant to make the joke, and Virgil once again sensed a hint of anxiety coming from the deceitful side.

This was weird. Of course, it was far from the first time that Virgil had sensed anxiety coming from Janus. Virgil sensed it quite a bit when they first met, and though it had lessened once they knew each other better, he had still sensed it a few times before he left the Dark Sides. He knew that, sometimes (though not always), Janus's apparent confidence was an act. Janus could be incredibly insecure sometimes, so it wasn't so strange for Virgil to sense that he felt that way.

He just didn't get why Janus was feeling that way now. Their conversation had gone well, hadn't it? Janus was one of them now. He knew that Virgil wasn't going to hiss at him and tell him to leave anymore, right?

… Actually, maybe he did understand why Janus would be feeling insecure. This was new, and he probably hadn't really found his footing amongst the others quite yet. And that one conversation about including Janus more probably hadn't entirely reassured him about Virgil's feelings about him being around. They hadn't really gotten along for a long time before then, after all.

… And Virgil had also been avoiding him.

Right. Yeah, that probably didn't help in convincing Janus that Virgil wasn't angry at him being around anymore.

"So," Virgil spoke again. "You haven't been coming out of your room much. Patton was wondering if you would start coming to breakfast more."

Janus shrugged.

"Yes, because I'm usually such a social butterfly," he drawled. "It's not like I usually spend most of my time in my room or anything."

"I'm not really social, either, but I'm pretty sure I leave my room more than you do, which is kinda saying something since I don't ever leave my room," Virgil replied, his tone half-joking.

"Is there a point to this conversation, Virgil?" Janus asked plainly.

Virgil fiddled with his sleeves.

"I dunno," he answered. "It's just… You aren't staying in your room 'cuz you think we dont want you around, right?"

"Do you?"

The words sounded defeated and somewhat bitter, and they made Anxiety cringe.

"I mean, we just had a whole big heart-to-heart about involving you, so."

"Yes, because listening to my input in regards to Thomas totally means that you all want me slithering around everywhere," Janus shot back with an eye-roll.

Oh.

"Janus, that conversation was about more than including you in just the videos. It was also about including you in everything else, too," Virgil explained.

Janus let out a scoff.

"Virgil, having that conversation doesn't really mean you want me around," he told him. "Thomas sometimes benefits from my input, but I don't really need to socialize with the rest of you to give it. Do you think I don't notice how all of you react when I do come out of my room? Logan doesn't care what I do, and it's a roulette with Roman. The only reason Patton doesn't mind my presence more is because he feels bad about what happened with the wedding. And don't try to tell me that you want me here."

Virgil knew that Janus's words were honest this time, which made him feel bad.

"Why do you think I don't want you here?" Virgil started.

Janus raised an eyebrow.

"Seriously, Virgil? I know very well that you didn't actually want me to stay when you said I could. That was literally a few minutes ago," Janus growled. "And every time I don't leave the room when you're there, you do. What about that suggests that you actually want to be anywhere near me?"

He left the past unspoken, but Virgil knew that was just as, if not more, important here.

Regardless, Janus's voice raised in volume as he spoke; however, the side thankfully kept it from getting to the point of yelling. Virgil doubted that either of them wanted this conversation to be interrupted.

But just as soon as Janus's face shifted to anger, it shifted back to indifference, though just enough emotion came through that Virgil could tell that it was just a mask for something else.

"I don't even exactly blame you all for it, though…," Janus said wistfully, turning his face determinedly toward the far wall. "Just… don't bother trying to lie to me, Virgil."

Now Virgil was definitely concerned. Janus could be insecure, but he was rarely honest about it.

He scooted closer and put a loose hand on Janus's shoulder.

"Jan. Look at me."

The man's pupils shifted in his direction, though his head remained in the same position. Virgil supposed that was good enough.

"Look, I can't exactly speak for the others, even though I know that whatever you think they think about you, it's probably exaggerated. Believe me, I know what that's like," Virgil said firmly. "But I can speak for myself, and even though I already said it, I'll say it again: I don't hate you. It's just… the situation has changed, and I'm not really sure what to do about it. I'm uncertain, and it's uncomfortable, and most of the time, I avoid things that make me uncomfortable. I'm sure that the others feel that way a bit too. We're not used to having you around, and the others don't even really know you. I do know you, but getting over the past is difficult."

Janus's gaze moved downward.

"I'm not avoiding you because I don't want you here. I just don't know what to do," Virgil continued. "But… if we're always avoiding each other, we're never gonna figure it out. So, I think we both need to just suck it up and start spending time together, or we're just going to keep avoiding each other forever. And I don't know about you, but I'd rather not have to deal with that."

Virgil took a deep breath in.

"So, just read your book. You can come read your book regardless of who's sitting here. And if we fight, we fight, and we figure it out from there," Virgil finished. "Got it?"

Janus played with the fingers of his gloves for a bit before responding.

"... You've changed, Virgil," he said with a conflicted sigh. "I never thought I'd hear you tell me to embrace conflict."

"Hey, I control fight too. Fight and flight doesn't mean that I have to run away from everything," Virgil pointed out.

Janus tapped his fingers against his sleeve.

"That's true, I suppose," he agreed. "But regardless, you've still changed."

"So have you, Scales."

"Hm."

By the time Patton stumbled into the commons, mumbling something about accidentally sleeping in, Janus had gone back to reading his book, and Virgil had fallen asleep next to him.

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