Back in the living room, Raven joined Kat, who was already snuggled into her blanket. Raven laid down and wrapped herself in her own blanket.
After letting her get settled in, Kat smiled. "Thanks again for letting me stay here for the night. I'm glad we can finally spend time together! I feel like we've only gotten to know each other when we're fighting some giant Nevi. And it was, well, nice to shower in someplace other than the gym for once. I borrowed your shampoo, hope you don't mind." Kat looked sheepishly over to Raven.
Raven chuckled, catching a whiff of her own sweet-scented shampoo. "It's fine. I'm also really, well, I'm glad that you, you know, I'm happy that you accepted my invitation," Raven stumbled over her words. Kat's genuineness was so endearing. "But wait, you shower at the gym?"
"Oh yeah, since I, well, I don't have my own place," Kat trailed off awkwardly.
"Oh, that's totally fine!" Raven scrambled to clarify, eyes widening as she realized that her question probably came off more judgemental than she wanted. "You're welcome to use mine whenever!" Wait, did she really just invite Kat to come by whenever? "You know, we barely had running water in Boutoume." And somehow, Kat's vulnerability spurred her to share more than she intended.
"I've been down there and it definitely seemed… Hard? To live there." It seemed that Kat sensed how sensitive the topic was for Raven and tried to tread lightly.
Raven could feel her limbs start to tingle with anxiety as her fragmented memories started to come back. She had never shared this much of her life with someone, but Kat seemed genuinely interested, her wide red eyes searching the depths of Raven's. "Water was scarce since the pipes didn't always work," she started, voice quiet as she stared off to the side. "And running hot water was even rarer. You must have seen where the food dropped in from, right? Well, there was still never enough. I remember Zaza giving up his rations to give to the kids. He'd say 'Look! More food from your parents! It won't be long now, it'll be soon. I know it.' And then a week would go by. And then two. And no one ever came."
Raven glanced up, meeting Kat's sympathetic gaze. "I'm so sorry, I never knew. I'm so glad you trusted me with that. I feel like, if we meet in better circumstances…" Kat suddenly glanced away, her cheeks flushed in the moonlight. "I mean, I'm just happy we can be together like this, you know? No fighting, no struggle."
Raven inhaled deeply, touched by Kat's words. Did she catch that right? If they had met in different circumstances… Was there a chance that her feelings were reciprocated? "Me too. I'm sorry that I, well, attacked you at first and everything. I know that we worked together later, but I don't know if I ever apologized. And, I do. Trust you, that is." Kat had more than proven her trustworthiness.
Kat hummed happily, then yawned, mouth wide and arms up, in such a Kat way that Raven couldn't help but smile at. "Sorry, it's getting late for me. And don't worry about it. I know you had a reason for everything. I don't blame you for anything."
"Thanks. And we can go to sleep now, if you want."
"Goodnight, Raven."
"Night."
Kat closed her eyes, her body turned towards Raven. The moonlight's glow traced her soft cheeks, small nose, the gentle swell of her lips. She looked so pure, it was hard to imagine that she was the one who put her life on the line to save the city. No wonder Raven was falling for her faster by the second, hoping that Kat would join her for the ride.
Raven too closed her eyes, smiling as she drifted off to sleep.
Zaza was crying and Raven didn't know what to do. Normally Zaza was the one to comfort her, his strong presence something she could rely on. And yet she was sitting next to him as he broke down, chest heaving, with his stomach occasionally growling as he drew in unsteady breaths. He had given some of his rations to a little boy for the past two days, offering encouraging words. And now…
"What am I supposed to do, Raven? I'm lying to their faces, saying that their parents care about them, that they're coming for them! I don't even think they remember us anymore! I can't just—"
And suddenly his voice was drowned out by screams, screams of terror as they tried to outrun Nushi. Faster, faster, her lungs burning, side cramping, legs dragging—she tripped, body falling forward helplessly, hands extending to catch herself when the ground dissolved below her and she plummeted, without any power to stop it, deeper into darkness.
In her room, she sat alone, hugging her knees to her chest. The food supply had dwindled and it was no longer falling down to them at the same rate. She too had given rations to the younger children, but everyone was hungry still. The hunger pains had evolved into a constant, dull ache that she tried to section off into the corner of her mind, but she had little success. Too weak to wander around and too tired to distract herself, she sat and stared. She couldn't afford to cry, not when even the water supply had become erratic and unreliable.
Murky forms bobbed in front of her. People, a couple, drawing nearer. Her parents. She squinted and tried to make them out, but they seemed to become more blurry the closer they came. And there were voices now. Arguing. About her. Blaming each other, blaming her, pathetic, worthless, unloveable—
Raven woke up frantic, eyes wide, chest heaving, whirling around to see Kat. Her hand was outstretched, hanging in the air, uncertain. Her eyebrows knit together in concern. "Raven? Are you ok? It was just a nightmare."
Shit. Of course she would have one the day that Kat was here. They came and went, unpredictable, but always the same theme. Running, starving, hopeless, with fragmented scenes that she couldn't seem to remember from anywhere. "I'm sorry," she whispered, leftover adrenaline and embarrassment mixing together. She breathed for a minute, focusing on slowing her heart rate like she knew how to. "They just happen sometimes. I didn't mean to wake you up."
Kat's concern didn't go away. "No, it's fine, really. Do you… want to talk about it?"
Did she? What even was there to say? "What time is it? I… Let's go back to sleep. I'll let you know in the morning."