Chapter 9 - Visions
DISCLAIMER: We do not own Star Wars, even if we wish we did. xD
The battle in the vision continues furiously until I'm thrown off a ledge. After a moment of recovering myself, I climb back up to see Vader trying to Force-pull something, that I get the feeling is important, away from the boy. There's another man with him now.
Igniting my lightsabers, I charge him from behind. Vader whirls around at the last moment, swinging his red lightsaber towards me. I leap through the air over his head, swinging one of my lightsabers to meet his, and the other one down across his helmet. Vader falls to the ground, and I land several feet away, lightsabers deactivating as I hit the ground.
I push myself up and turn around to see Vader still kneeling behind me. The boy and the other person use the temporary distraction to scramble back towards the waiting ship. Vader raises his head, revealing a crack in his helmet through which I can see a yellow eye.
"Ahsoka! Ahsoka," he calls. He sounds half like Anakin now, his tone somehow distinctly caring, even though it shouldn't be.
"Anakin?" I exclaim. I pull myself to my feet, staring at my brother. I can feel the sense of fierce determination in her, even if it's not me. "I won't leave you. Not this time."
He stares back at me for several long moments before his eye narrows and fills with anger again. "Then you will die," he snarls, activating his lightsaber again. He begins walking closer to me, but I don't move or react. I just stand there, accepting my death.
"Ahsoka! No!" yells the boy, running back down the ramp of the ship, trying to come for me. I Force-shove him backwards at the ship before turning back to Vader. Spinning around, I activate my lightsabers and block his blow from behind. The ship fully closes, and our battle continues raging.
A sudden explosion draws my eyes to the ceiling. The building is collapsing. On us. Our lightsabers continue clashing furiously. He's attacking me with the same intensity he was in the end back on Cloud City, except this time I'm doing a much better job fighting back.
We get trapped in a saberlock. Moments tick by as I struggle to keep his lightsaber from striking me. Suddenly, there's an explosion as the ceiling above us gives way. I shove him backwards with my lightsabers and then slam the blades into the floor between us. Instantly, the floor starts to crumble. I raise my head unflinching from where the cracks spread across the ground, watching as Vader raises his lightsaber.
Someone yanks me backwards just as Vader swings his lightsaber in what would have been a killing blow. Simultaneously, the floor caves in, and he falls through the hole.
It's the last thing I see before my older self reappears. I'm back in the vision. Or is it a vision, considering I think I'm actually still alive? It's hard to say. Maybe it's a communication through the Force.
"Anakin's still there," I insist. I know it.
She pauses for a long moment, pain clear in her eyes, before replying. "Yes, but your focus is the past. Not the future." True enough. Even though I don't fully understand what I have to change, at least I have an idea where to start.
"Why do you have white lightsabers?" I inquire.
"I got the crystals from an Inquisitor and healed them of the Dark Side using the Force, so they turned white." Interesting. I didn't even know that was possible.
Still, I get the feeling that there's something else I'm missing. "What else do I need to know?"
"I became a Grey Jedi after spending a long time meditating on what to call myself. I realized that there's a lot the Jedi don't understand. I finally figured out exactly what the vision on Mortis was telling me. That there was more I wouldn't see if I stayed as a Jedi; our destiny lies outside of them. And with the time here, maybe you won't have to leave to realize this." I really don't know what to say to that. After seeing the fight, I shouldn't be surprised to hear about this, but I definitely never expected it. After all, if I wasn't with the Jedi, where else would I go?
"What exactly do the Grey Jedi believe?" I question interestedly.
My older self takes a deep breath and then begins to recite.
There is no dark side, nor a light side.
There is only the Force.
I will do what I must to keep the balance.
The balance is what keeps me together.
There is no good without evil,
But evil must not be allowed to flourish.
There is passion, yet peace.
There is serenity, yet emotion.
There is chaos, yet order.
I am the wielder of the flame, the protector of balance.
I am the holder of the torch, lighting the way.
I am the keeper of the flame, soldier of balance.
I am a guardian of balance.
I am a Gray Jedi.
This is all a lot to process. We lapse into silence for a few moments as I think. It's totally against everything I've been taught my whole life, but there's a part of me that agrees with it, especially with the latest turn of events. I always knew the Jedi weren't completely right on some things, but everything that's happening now is just amplifying those feelings. This is almost beginning to make me wonder if the prophecy of the Chosen One wasn't completely misinterpreted by everyone.
It's something I'll have to spend a long time meditating on to understand. Right now, though, we should discuss anything else we have to, since there's no saying how long this meeting will be able to last. I doubt we can talk forever like this.
"If I'm going to change anything, I need to know exactly how the Empire was formed," I declare, "Or at least something about what was happening around that time." Anything more than what I know would be helpful, actually.
"Not long before the Empire was formed, I re-met up with Anakin and ended up searching for Maul. Palpatine arranged his own kidnapping by General Grievous, and Anakin and Obi-Wan went to the rescue," she begins to relate, immediately having my full attention.
"Dooku was killed during the fight, and Palpatine, unfortunately, arrived safely on Coruscant. The war continued even with Dooku's death, however, because Grievous was still alive. Shortly thereafter, Grievous was located on Utapau, and Obi-Wan was sent to kill him. The majority of the Council, including Master Yoda, were off of Coruscant as well. I don't know what exactly happened, but Anakin Fell. After that, Sidious gave the order to the clones to kill the Jedi."
"And they did it?!" I cry, horrified. How could they? They'd fought alongside the Jedi for years by then!
"They did," she confirms, visibly hesitating. "I – I don't know how much of this I should actually tell you. There are some things which would be better for you to learn on your own. Trust in the Force. It will reveal the truth when it's time."
I nod numbly, seeing the truth of her words, but still wishing that she could tell me everything. It's obvious that there are some things which she wants to share but feels that either I'm not ready, or that I need to find out when the time is right. I don't like it, but it is what it is. My mind is drawn back to what she said about the clones.
Why would they do that? It doesn't make any sense. We've known each other for years. A stab of anger shoots through me as I mull over the bigger details of what happened. Of course, Sidious would get Obi-Wan off Coruscant before pulling whatever he had planned. Without me, Obi-Wan was the only one keeping Anakin there. I just wish I knew exactly why this all had to happen.
"If Grievous had died earlier, then maybe things would have been different," I muse.
My older self nods. "Possibly. At least it might have made it more difficult for Sidious to succeed." We look at each other, an idea starting to form in our heads at once. "If you could eliminate Grievous earlier…"
"I'm just not sure how I could do that. I mean, neither of the times we fought I was strong enough to defeat him. I can't do it alone." I suppose I could have tried harder, maybe, but my fighting style doesn't work very well against his. I'm good at the offensive, as is my master, not defensive.
"You'll figure something out," she assures me.
"Very helpful," I reply sarcastically.
"I've told you all I can. A thousand generations live in you now, but this is your fight," she responds seriously, ignoring my remark. Somehow, the world in front of me starts disappearing. "May the Force be with you." It's the last thing I hear before everything fades out.
My eyes open to reveal the ceiling of a cabin in the Falcon. I'm awake back on the ship now. Well, I have far too much to think about to be sleeping now, even if it's still the middle of the night. I begin mentally going over everything that I need to do once I get back to my own time.
First of all, I need to stay as close as possible to Anakin and try to make sure Obi-Wan is doing likewise. I don't know how much I'll tell them about this, but I'll worry about it when the time comes. There's no way to know what all will even happen here, so I'll have to think about it once I'm at home, since clearly, I'll be returning. I wonder for a moment why I was sent to the future instead of Obi-Wan. It'd seem like he'd do better at keeping Anakin from Falling. Then again, he already lost Anakin's trust. I still have it.
I wince when I remember the undercover mission. I'd never seen Anakin so angry, so hurt in my life. As Vader it's different, maybe almost in a better way. Up until my framing, that was probably what hurt me the most. It wasn't easy to see someone I cared for so much die, even though he wasn't really dead, I suppose. I was still able look past my own pain to see Anakin's. It's something I'll never forget even though I want to.
Shaking the memories out of mind, I recall another thing I really need to do. Eliminate Grievous, and possibly Dooku too, neither of which are going to be easy.
Suddenly an idea forms in my mind. I really wish there was a way I could find out more about how Anakin Fell – more than what my older self told me. No one here alive knows… but there is someone who's not exactly living who might know more.
Slipping out of bed, careful not to disturb the other sleeping occupants of the cabin, I sneak out of the room and go in search of Artoo and Threepio. Even if no one else can tell me anything, at least one of them should be able to. Artoo more than likely knows, I suspect, since Threepio is too talkative to keep secrets properly.
I step into the room the droids were in earlier to see that they're both still there. "Ahsoka!" exclaims Threepio in surprise, "May I be of assistance?"
"Aren't most beings supposed to be sleeping at this hour?" beeps Artoo.
"I need to talk to you," I inform, "Ask you some stuff about the past… from the timeline I came from."
"What?" Artoo beeps.
"I'm afraid I can't be of help," objects Threepio sadly, "Since Artoo claims that my memory was wiped."
"Just don't say anything to anyone about whatever happens here and that will be help enough," I assure the droid, hoping he'll let me talk to his friend in peace now.
"As you wish, Mistress Ahsoka," Threepio agrees reluctantly before falling silent.
I sit down on the floor next to Artoo. It's weird how my only friend here who I can talk to freely about everything right now is a droid. They really are more helpful than most people would imagine.
Taking a deep breath, trying to shake the sudden worried, I ask, "When was the last time you saw Anakin?"
"Right before he deactivated," comes the prompt reply.
"Can you show me?" I inquire.
"You don't want to see this, Ahsoka," Artoo sounds about as worried as a bunch of beeps could sound. What happened? If even Artoo is warning me about seeing it, just what happened? Now this I must see. It's something I need to know, though it will probably hurt.
"Just show me," I urge.
Artoo beeps a reluctant reply before he projects a hologram, and a recording begins to play.