Trigger Warning: Infertility, miscarriage, abortion, and premature labor is mentioned and talked about in-depth in this chapter and again in later chapters. This warning will be in all chapters where these subjects are explored.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter book series or movie adaptations.

Chapter Twelve: Life

5 December 2025

Rose,

I don't know how to say this really, only Alice said that I needed to owl you first, before anyone else, or you'd kill the both of us. She's pregnant! It's still early, and she hasn't scheduled an appointment with a healer yet, but we're both very excited. We'd like you to be the godmother, if you'll accept. I expect that she'll be owling you soon to talk more about it.

How are you and Scorpius? Is everything still going well between the two of you? If he's hurt you again I'll cut out his throat.

Mum wanted me to remind you that if you're bringing food for Christmas, she needs to know what you're bringing. Alice wanted me to remind you that if you don't bring your apple pie then Mum will make hers.

Much love,

Albus

I smiled as I read the letter from my cousin. Alice and Albus, unlike Scorpius and I, had been diligently trying for a baby since they got married. While he and I had talked about the possibility of a child in the future, neither of us was sure that that was what we wanted at this exact time. Our marriage was still young, and we both liked the idea of having a baby later, like our parents had.

I drafted a letter of congratulations for my cousin and his wife, and then started another one to tell Auntie Ginny that I would be bringing my apple pie, per Alice's advice. Auntie Ginny's was almost inedible.

By the time I was done it was nearly one o' clock, and I knew that I should be going downstairs. Scorpius and I had decided, for convenience's sake, to schedule both of our yearly checkups for the same day, and we were both meant to be at the healer's office in half an hour.

I made my way downstairs, where my husband was already waiting patiently by the fireplace. He kissed my forehead when I reached him. "Ready to go?" he asked.

I nodded. "The sooner we get there, the sooner we get back," I said.

"Do you have anything you need to do when we get back?"

I shrugged. "I've done my article for the week," I answered. "I could get started on next weeks' article, but I don't think I need to do that tonight. What about you?"

Scorpius smiled a little and kissed me. "I haven't decided yet," he said, slowly looking me up and down. I blushed at his innuendo. He'd taken to making jokes like that since we got married, but I never got used to it.

Ten minutes later, I sat on an examination table while a healer, Healer Jane, asked me all sorts of questions about my medical history and that of my family.

"Alright," the healer said at the end of the long line of questions. "If you'll lay down, I'd like to run some tests to check for cancer, pregnancy, infertility, blood pressure issues, and any other irregularities."

I nodded and laid down. Healer Jane stood to the side of the examination table and waved her wand over my body, uttering an incantation before slowly moving it down my body from my head to my feet and back up. The tip of her wand stayed green for most of it, turning blue as it passed my stomach before turning green again.

At the end, the healer's brows scrunched together. "Rose," she said, "I'm going to go get another healer for a moment. I don't want to alarm you, but I want someone else to run the test again to confirm the results."

I frowned, concerned. "Okay," I said. "Is it bad?"

Healer Jane shook her head. "It's probably fine," she said, "I'm just going to go get some assistance."

Another healer came in with her five minutes later and waved his wand over my body the same way. Again, it stayed green through the whole test except for while it was over my stomach.

Both healers sighed before Healer Jane motioned for me to sit up. "Alright, Rose," she said. "Would you like your husband with you?"

I took in a deep breath. What was happening? "No," I said. "I just want you to tell me what's going on."

The second healer excused himself before leaving, but Healer Jane stayed and took a deep breath. "The test was mostly normal. You don't have cancer, high or low blood pressure, or anything like that. However, the part of the test that we ran on your uterus shows an abnormality. Now, there are two possibilities. The first is that you're pregnant, which seems unlikely given that normally the indicator for that turns up pink, not blue. The second, however, is that your uterus isn't functioning the way that it would be expected to be for any number of reasons. Because this was a preliminary test, I can't give an official diagnosis, so we're going to run more tests before you leave here today. Alright?"

I frowned. "Alright," I said. "Run your tests." I paused. "And I'd like my husband now, please."

I came home that night and went straight to my office, despite Scorpius' objections. Some part of me knew that it was unfair to exclude him, that he would be in as much pain as I was, but nonetheless I couldn't bring the larger part of my mind to care.

The healer had run tests all afternoon, one after the other. It had taken nearly three and a half hours and Hermione Granger-Weasley-style research to get to the source of the problem, which was, ironically, my mother herself. Or rather, her healer.

I was born in 2007, right before muggleborns like my mother finally climbed their way high enough in the Ministry of Magic to begin working toward heavier muggle-wizard relations. Prior to that, wizards didn't use technology and their ways of healing were still rather primitive, or at least more so than the muggles' ways were. Wizarding healing was at least fifty years behind muggle healing at the time, so although muggles already knew that artificial estrogen during pregnancy caused problems in the children that were being carried, wizards hadn't gotten that memo yet.

Apparently, for a reason that my healers could not disclose to me, my mother had been given artificial estrogen during the early days of her pregnancy with me. Her prescription for it had been discontinued within a couple of months, when the potion had been proven dangerous, so nobody had thought to inform either her or me of possible complications I might have because of it.

Nonetheless, the tests on my uterus and ovaries confirmed that my uterus, to put it simply, was shaped wrong, something that was relatively common in daughters exposed to the potions my mother had been. The healer said that she was very confused how this hadn't been caught earlier, as normally it caused very painful and inconsistent cycles, something that for the most part I hadn't noticed.

This defect carried a thirteen percent rate of miscarriage in pregnant women, and a twenty-five percent chance of premature labor in pregnant women. This wouldn't have affected me much, of course, if it hadn't also been found out that I was pregnant.

I didn't even know how to begin processing all of this information. Scorpius and I weren't exactly in the worst place to be having children, of course. We were getting along, and I'd almost venture to say that we were completely happy being man and wife. We were both also financially well-off and my job afforded me plenty of free time that would be needed to care for a baby when it was time.

At the same time, I wasn't sure I wanted a baby right now, and Scorpius wasn't either. Not to mention the fact that pregnancy was a scary concept even if there wasn't extra danger for both me and my baby.

My baby.

I put my hands over my belly, which still lay completely flat. The healer had said that I was about three weeks along, still too early to have missed my period, which is why I hadn't known. Unfortunately, that also meant that I was still early enough that miscarriage was still a major possibility.

I sat at my desk and began writing letters, first to Mum, then to Alice, then to Deirdre, but no matter what letter I started I could never finish it. Nothing I could think of to say seemed right. I wanted to talk to Mum the most, so that's what I did.

Healer Jane had said that the floo was fine for the baby, so I left a note on my office door for Scorpius and then floo'd to Mum's house. She was in the living room, reading a book, when I got there. Immediately I went to her and laid my head in her lap before sobbing.

I've always hated crying, and yet I couldn't stop myself at that moment. I laid in my mum's lap like a child, crying as she sat in silent confusion, pulling her fingers through my hair the way that she knew I liked. It could have been an hour or three hours before my sobs turned to hiccups and I finally sat up.

The events of the day came flooding out of my mouth immediately, unhindered and unfiltered. By the end of it, Mum had tears in her eyes as well, and she engulfed me in a hug when I was done. "I'm so sorry," she whispered into my hair.

"I don't blame you," I said. "You don't have to be sorry. I just, I don't know what to do."

Mum ran her fingers through my hair again as I laid my head on her chest. "So," she said. "What do you want to do with the baby?"

I sighed. "The healer said we could abort it if we wanted to. Otherwise, I could attempt to carry it to term. I haven't talked to Scorpius at all yet, though."

I could feel her shake her head. "I didn't ask what your options were, love. I know what your options are. And as much as I've come to love Scorpius, his opinion doesn't matter as much as yours. You're the one carrying the baby, and you're the one who will have to deal with the consequences of whatever you decide. What do you want to do with the baby?"

I paused. I'd been so busy with what-ifs and possible options and what might be the smartest thing to do that I hadn't actually thought about what I really wanted. I placed my hand over my stomach again.

"I want to keep it," I whispered. For better or worse, I'd always wanted children, and I couldn't imagine aborting this one just because I hadn't planned him or her. I was in the right time of life, the right financial situation, and whether or not I had expected to be, I was happy being with Scorpius. It was a good time.

Mum nodded. "Alright then," she said. "We'll find you the best healer available, we'll make sure you have every resource available, and we'll do our best for you and this baby." She paused. "You'll need to tell Scorpius, though."

I nodded and stood. "I love you, Mum."

Mum smiled at me. "I love you too, Rose."

I turned to leave, but stopped in my tracks before throwing down the Floo powder. "Mum?"

She nodded, "Yes?"

"Don't tell anyone yet," I said. "Not even dad. Please."

She smiled. "My lips are sealed."