Reply to nowayitendslikethat: Everything's okay! Unfortunately that chapter just couldn't be any longer without redundancy. I aim for approximately 2,000 words each chapter, and that one capped at approximately 1,900.

Trigger Warning: Infertility, miscarriage, and premature labor is mentioned and talked about in-depth in this chapter and again in later chapters. This warning will be in all chapters where these subjects are explored.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter book series or movie adaptations.

Chapter Thirteen: Leave

24 December 2025

Rose,

Is everything okay? You haven't said much recently and Albus says you've not been writing them much either. We're all worried for you.

On another note, August says the Malfoys host a Christmas Eve celebration every year. Are you planning on going to that as well as the Weasley gathering tomorrow? If so, I can't wait to see you. I feel like we girls haven't hung out at all since the weddings.

Love,

Daya

I sighed as I finished reading my friend's letter. She was right, of course. The Malfoys were hosting a Christmas Eve party, as they had done since the end of the Second Wizarding War. The party was strictly adults-only, so I had never been before, but every other adult in my family had, since the party was for pretty much the entirety of wizarding society. The fact that the party was on Christmas Eve and not Christmas, actually, was because such a large portion of the attendees were Weasleys or Weasley-Christmas attendees.

I drafted a response telling Daya that we would, in fact, be going to both parties, and asking her if she was planning on going to the Weasley gathering as well, since she had pretty much always done so before. Unfortunately, by the time I was done with that, it was already four o' clock.

The unfortunate thing about the Malfoy party was that it was a formal gathering, which meant I was supposed to be wearing a gown and getting dressed up, which would take hours. At not quite six weeks along in my pregnancy, I had started feeling the effects of morning sickness but had luckily not started showing, so I'd managed to hide my pregnancy from everyone except for my mother and husband.

Scorpius and I had talked for hours the night that we found out I was pregnant, and we had agreed that for the moment discretion would be key. The more people that knew about the pregnancy, the more stressful it would likely be, and the more likely I was to miscarry. Not to mention, if I did miscarry, we wouldn't want to have told everyone and have to deal with all of their opinions in the aftermath.

I shivered. We have a contingency plan for if I miscarry. Great. Just what every pregnant mother wants. Despite myself, however, I couldn't help but smile just a little bit when I thought of myself as a pregnant mother.

I placed both hands on my stomach. Even though I knew I wouldn't show yet and my baby wouldn't be moving either, I couldn't help but wish I could feel him or her. As yet, I could see no proof that I was pregnant except the test my healer had run. I hadn't even been able to see my little bean on an ultrasound or hear his or her heartbeat because of how early it was.

I took a deep breath and moved out of my study and toward my bedroom. If I didn't get started now, I wouldn't be ready in time for the party, which started at eight.

Scorpius was already in our bedroom when I got there, quietly laying on our bed and reading a book. He looked up when I opened the door and smiled just slightly at me. "Hi," he said quietly.

I sighed. "I'm not breakable," I said as I moved toward the vanity. "You don't have to always speak softly and move slowly. You're not gonna scare me or break me or cause me to miscarry just by existing."

"I know," Scorpius said. His voice was still lowered, and I couldn't help but feel annoyed. We'd had this conversation almost constantly since we'd decided to keep the baby. I shook my head and took a steadying breath, deciding to leave it alone. I sat down at the vanity, running a brush through my long hair. Within a moment I heard Scorpius shift, and then he stood behind me. He tentatively put his hand on my shoulder and I paused to look up at him. "Can I do it?"

I frowned. He'd brushed my hair for me a couple of times since we'd been married. He claimed to like doing so, and it was so long that it was easier for him to do it than me. Nonetheless, he'd barely touched me since we'd found out about our little bean, let alone brushed my hair or anything like that. "Okay," I said.

I stood up and moved to sit on the edge of the bed, and Scorpius sat behind me, grabbing the brush from my hand before gingerly pulling it through my hair. He always took great care with my hair, never pulling and pausing altogether to deal with each little tangle without causing me pain. It took him at least twice or three times the amount of time it took me to work through all of it.

When he was done, Scorpius pulled my hair aside and kissed the side of my neck softly. "I love you," he said.

I smiled softly. "I love you too."

It wasn't the first time we'd said that to each other, of course, but the phase was used very sparingly. Our marriage hadn't initially been based on love or even trust, and it felt wrong to pretend that it was. Nonetheless, I had come to love my husband again since our marriage, and since finding out about the little bean he had been one of only two people I felt that I could talk to for any length of time.

Scorpius reached around me to place his hand on top of mine, which had come to rest on my stomach. "I love our baby too," he said.

I stiffened. "It isn't a baby yet," I said. The smile had dropped off my face, and I grabbed the brush from him and moved to put it on the vanity, where I sat and began putting on my makeup.

"I know you don't call him or her that," Scorpius said, "But it is."

"It's an embryo, Scorpius," I said. I tried to keep my voice level. "We could lose it any second. You can't just lose a baby. A baby doesn't just bleed out of you. You deliver a baby. Until it's big enough that if I lose it I'll have to deliver it first, it isn't a baby."

"That isn't fair," Scorpius started, "It's-"

"I don't care if it's fair!" I turned around quickly. "None of this is fair! My mum took medicine when she was pregnant with me and my uterus only fused together halfway. That isn't fair. I'm pregnant now and at any moment I could just not be anymore. That's not fair. If I have to make the difference between a baby and our little bean in my head in order to cope with the constant fear that I could lose him or her, I will damn well do that!"

I was standing now, and Scorpius looked like a kicked dog. I half regretted my tone, but the words were necessary. I couldn't believe he didn't understand the way that this entire thing was paining me.

Scorpius nodded mutely and looked at the ground. "I'm going to go get into my suit," he said, and with that he walked into our bathroom and closed the door.

I willed myself not to cry as I looked back at myself in the vanity mirror. Crying wouldn't help, and I had already half-finished my foundation. I blinked hard and looked up at the ceiling in an effort to stay the tears that threatened to fall.

At seven thirty, Scorpius and I floo'd into the main hall of Malfoy Manor. The party wasn't set to start until eight, but Astoria had invited us to arrive a little bit early. She hadn't seen either of us since Halloween and was excited to catch up and see her eldest son again.

"Scorpius!" Astoria's happy voice filled the air as we stepped into the ballroom. She wore a gorgeous red gown which clung to her figure, which was still slender despite having had two children. She looked absolutely stunning.

Astoria hugged both Scorpius and then me tightly before holding me at arms length by my shoulders. "Your gown is lovely sweetheart."

I smiled gratefully. I'd picked a long ice-blue dress with white lace over a wide skirt that started at my mid-stomach because, even though I knew it was too early to show, I didn't want to take any chances. As far as I was concerned, I wanted nobody to know I was pregnant until absolutely necessary. "Thanks, Astoria," I said.

Next to come up to us was Narcissa, who wore a green velvet dress with a neckline that began at her collarbone. It wasn't as tight as Astoria's, but it still hinted at the woman's aging but still beautiful figure. "Scorpius," she said stiffly, "Rose." She kissed both of our cheeks before turning to Scorpius. "Votre femme a-t-elle besoin de nous dire quelque chose?"

Scorpius stiffened. "Rien du tout, grand-mère."

I frowned. I didn't understand French very well, or almost at all. Nonetheless, I shook it off and smiled as my husband's grandmother walked away and his father took her place.

Draco hugged his son briefly and kissed my cheek. "You look stunning, Rose," he said with a warm smile.

"Thank you, Draco," I said with a smile back. I'd come to adore my father-in-law almost as much as my own father.

"So," said Astoria, "How are you two? Surely something interesting has happened since the last time we've seen you."

"How is the family front looking?" Narcissa, as always, was very straightforward and to-the-point.

"Nothing much has happened," Scorpius answered, "And as soon as there's news to share on the family front we will let you know." He ended his sentence with a pointed look at his grandmother.

Narcissa opened her mouth as if to respond, but before she could the ballroom doors opened and people began to come in. As though Imperiused, she walked toward them and began to greet her guests. I was grateful for the interruption. Narcissa had been incessant in her talk about babies since the wedding, and the way that she stared at my stomach made me nervous.

The night began then, and for the next few hours I was pulled from person to person, congratulating newly married couples whose weddings I hadn't attended this summer and catching up with people that I hadn't seen in a little while. Talk of babies completely subsided, and Scorpius made sure to keep my glass full with sparkling cider all night so as not to call attention to the fact that I wasn't partaking in champagne or other alcoholic drinks. For a little while, I almost thought that I had completely avoided anyone's suspicion for the night.

Almost.

At nearly eleven o' clock, when the party was just beginning to wind down, I found myself in a group of ladies that included my mother, Alice, Daya, Deirdre, my mother, Auntie Ginny, Astoria, and Narcissa. As expected, the subject turned to Alice and her incoming baby.

"When are you due?" My mother was the one to posit the question.

"The healer says June," Alice said, her hand resting on her barely-there bump. "Right around the tenth."

"That's amazing," Astoria said. "Congratulations."

Alice smiled almost blindingly. "Thank you." She looked around at the rest of the group. "I almost wish that one of these girls would be with me, though. I liked growing up at the same time as all of them and having built-in best friends. It would be nice if my little peanut could get the same."

I smiled slightly. I was due in August, which meant that Alice's peanut and my little bean would be in the same year at Hogwarts if everything went to plan.

"Well," said Narcissa, "I suppose it's a good thing that Rose is expecting, then."

I choked on my apple cider. "What?" It came out as more of a screech than an actual question. Immediately I saw Scorpius walk over from my peripheral vision, followed soon after by Albus and Draco and then Uncle Harry.

"A woman knows, my dear," Narcissa said. "You've had your hand on your stomach half the night, you've excused yourself to the restroom more than a handful of times, and your glass is full of apple cider." She paused and smirked. "I'm not wrong, am I?"

I looked around the group, my head beginning to pound. I felt lightheaded and embarrassed and angry all at once. I felt tears prick my eyes.

And then I walked away, through the doors, and to the floo.