A/N: After reading the comments posted on the last chapter I took some time away from this section of the site. I haven't worked on any of my VM fics that are still in progress. I just thought I'd post this since it was already written before I took my hiatus. Hopefully I'll get back to writing soon. I have a couple more chapters that I wrote that I'll try and post in the next couple weeks.

Chapter 14

Veronica had gone home from the hospital with her dad and didn't want to talk about what had happened. She holed up in her room not going to classes and only coming out to get something to eat.

Logan had gone to their apartment to be with her while her dad was at the office. Keith hadn't wanted to leave her alone, but he couldn't put off working on the case he had any longer. When Veronica saw Logan at the door she broke down and told him to go away. She didn't want to see him because it made her remember and she didn't want to think about that day ever again.

"Veronica, you can't keep pushing me away," Logan said through the closed door. He knew she was still standing close to it and he wasn't going to leave her there to breakdown all over again. "I need to be with you. I need to know that you're going to be ok and that you're taking care of yourself. What you do doesn't just affect you anymore, it affects our baby too."

Veronica opened the door and Logan quickly pulled her into his arms. "Let it all out," Logan told her and her maneuvered them to the sofa after closing the door. He held her as she cried. He wasn't sure how she even had more tears to cry. He'd been sure she'd cried them all out the day of the incident, as he referred to it. He couldn't bear to say the word rape. The image of that day was burned into his brain and as much as he wished it would go away he wanted that even more for Veronica.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you," Logan said as he began to cry softly. His heart broke knowing that there had been nothing he could've done to stop Mercer. He wished the damage he'd inflicted in the jail cell had cause more damage so Mercer wouldn't have been able to walk, let alone rape Veronica.

After Veronica began to calm down Logan brought up the subject of talking to a therapist.

"Neither of us are dealing with this well," Logan told her as he continued to cradle her in his arms. "I think talking to someone about it might make you feel a little better. I mean you didn't talk to anyone last time and I don't want you to do that this time. Bottling up your emotions isn't going to make what happened go away and in your condition it could end up causing you to have a miscarriage."

"Oh God," Veronica said and rushed from the sofa to her bedroom. She had been feeling nauseous more often since the rape. Logan was right though, she wasn't handling this time any better than the last. She was holding in her emotions, even though she didn't need to do that. She had people who knew what happened, people she could talk to about it. It made her feel even sicker to think of how Logan must have felt watching Mercer and hearing what he did. She couldn't blame Logan for turning away when Mercer began to rape her. She knew he was hurting too. Neither of them would ever be able to remove the images of that day from their minds.

Logan entered the bathroom a minute later. She was sitting on the floor next to the toilet waiting to see if she was done before getting cleaned up. Logan handed her a wet rag and knelt next to her. She looked like she hadn't slept since the rape and he was extremely worried about her health, not just for her but for their baby as well.

She moved to get up and Logan followed her out to her bedroom. She'd only taken a few steps into the room when she started to collapse. Logan reached out to catch her so she wouldn't fall.

"I'm fine," Veronica told him once she regained her balance.

"You don't look fine," Logan said as she walked over to sit on her bed. "When was the last time you ate?"

"I had a banana for breakfast," Veronica told him moving to lay down. She still felt lightheaded.

"What did you eat before that?" he asked.

"I had some cereal last night," Veronica informed him.

"I'm taking you to the hospital," Logan told her and he leaned down to lift her into his arms. "Don't fight me on this Veronica. You obviously haven't been taking very good care of yourself and it's going to affect our baby."

He looked around her room and spotted her purse on her desk chair. He bent to grab it.

"My phone," Veronica told him, pointing at her nightstand. He moved over and let her grab it before he headed out of her room and the apartment. He set her down so he could close and lock the door. She'd taken her bag from him and tossed her phone inside. He handed her keys back and she shoved them back where they belonged.

He lifted her back into his arms and carried her to his car. He figured he'd call Keith and let him know what was going on once Veronica got settled at the hospital.

"How's she doing?" Keith asked Logan when entered the hospital room and saw that Veronica was sleeping.

"She's not doing well at all," Logan told him. He knew Keith had to have seen the way Veronica had been during the past week. "She was dehydrated. She told the doctor she hasn't been able to keep anything down for long since the rape. She's beating herself up over it and it's taking a toll on her and the baby. They're sending a psychiatrist down to talk to her. She's got an IV and they gave her some medication for the nausea."

"I'm glad you brought her here Logan," Keith said moving to sit in the other chair in the room. "I knew she wasn't taking care of herself. I should've done something about it sooner."

"She's stubborn Keith," Logan said. "She wouldn't have let you do anything. I think she finally realized that she needed to get help, not for herself but for the baby. I think the baby is the only thing keeping her from completely falling apart right now to be honest."

"I think you're probably right," her dad replied.

They both sat there in silence for a while just watching Veronica sleep. He doctor came in to check on her. He woke Veronica up to check her blood pressure and told her the psychiatrist would be in to talk to her soon.

Keith had to go back to the office. He had a meeting with a client, but he promised Veronica he'd be back to check on her after he closed up shop.

When the psychiatrist came in Logan got up to leave.

"Please stay," Veronica practically begged. She didn't want to talk to the woman about what happened alone. She wanted Logan there because she knew she was going to break down. She needed him there. They had gone through the rape together and they needed to get through the aftermath together. It was the only way they'd be able to have a chance at having a normal relationship again. They needed to be there to help each other heal.

Logan stopped, waiting to see what the doctor had to say.

"Veronica, I'm Dr. Cooper," the doctor introduced herself walking over to the bed to shake her hand. "If you want your friend to stay while we talk that's fine with me."

"Boyfriend," Veronica said. "Logan is my boyfriend."

"It's nice to meet you Logan," Dr. Cooper said holding out her hand to shake his.

"Thank you for coming," Logan said moving to sit back down beside the bed.

Dr. Cooper positioned the chair on the the other side of the bed so she was facing both of them and sat down. "Why don't you tell me what's going on with you Veronica," the doctor said looking at the young woman lying in the hospital bed. The ER doctor who'd been treating Veronica had asked for someone to come talk to her but hadn't included a reason for the visit.

"I was raped last week," Veronica told her.

The doctor wrote down what Veronica told her. "I assume you were brought in when it happened," Dr. Cooper said.

"Yes, and I was released the following day," Veronica told her.

"So, why are you back in the hospital?" Dr. Cooper questioned. It wasn't uncommon for women to end up back in the hospital following a rape. Some women recoiled into themselves and didn't take care of their basic needs resulting in hospitalization.

"I haven't really been dealing with what happened and Logan was worried about the baby," Veronica explained.

"So, you're pregnant," Dr. Cooper said. "I take it you were pregnant before you were raped then."

"Yeah," Veronica replied. "I'm three months pregnant."

Dr. Cooper wrote something else down and then looked at Veronica again. "So Logan brought you to the hospital because he thought you weren't taking care of yourself and it was affecting your baby?" Dr. Cooper asked, making sure she understood what had happened that day.

"Yes," Veronica told her. "He was right to be worried. I tend to not deal with things and trying to push the rape from my mind wasn't working. I'd pretty much shut down."

"So, you think Logan was right to bring you here today," Dr. Cooper stated.

"I almost passed out, so yeah I think he was right," Veronica said looking over at Logan.

"You said you tend to not deal with things and tried to push the rape from your mind," Dr. Cooper said. "Can I assume you're ready to talk about what happened and try to work to get past it?"

"Yeah," Veronica said starting to cry. "I want to get past it so Logan and I can start a new life with our baby."

Logan reached out to hold her hand while she cried. He hated to see her so broken.

"Ok, why don't we start by you telling me what happened the day of the rape," Dr. Cooper told her.

"I was with Logan at his house and I'd passed out after hearing some unsettling news," Veronica told her. "When I woke up I was tied to a bed in one of the guest rooms. The guy, Mercer, had been undressing me and forced Logan to watch. He'd tied Logan completely to the bed next to me. He had taken off my jeans and pushed the shirt I'd been wearing up. He was touching my breasts when I opened my eyes."

Veronica's tears started flowing more freely.

"You said his name is Mercer," Dr. Copper said. "You knew the man who raped you?"

"Yes," Logan told her when Veronica couldn't continue. "I used to be friends with him until he tried to rape Veronica two months ago."

"He tried to rape you before last week?" Dr. Cooper asked Veronica.

Veronica just nodded. "He was the Hearst rapist," Logan explained. "Veronica was the one to figure it out and he drugged and tried to rape her but she got away after injuring him. Veronica's dad hunted him down and turned him over to the sheriff."

"Veronica said you were on the bed when she woke up," Dr. Cooper said to Logan.

"Yeah, Mercer had drugged me and tied me to the bed," Logan said. "He wanted me to watch while he raped Veronica. I couldn't do anything to stop him and I turned away when he moved between her legs. I didn't want to see what he was doing. It was bad enough to have to hear him moaning out and saying how good she felt."

"That must have been horrible for you," Dr. Cooper said.

"It was worse than anything else I've been through in my life," Logan replied, hating to even think of that day and what Veronica had gone through.

"Do you think seeing that happen to Veronica has changed your relationship?" Dr. Cooper asked.

"Of course it has!" Logan yelled at her. "There are times when Veronica can't even look me in the eyes."

"Did seeing what happened change your view of Veronica?" Dr. Cooper asked.

"No, I love her and nothing could possibly change how I feel about her," Logan replied.

Veronica had begun to compose herself while Logan talked to Dr. Cooper.

"You don't think I'm tainted now?" Veronica asked Logan interrupting his conversation with Dr. Cooper.

"Of course not," Logan told her. "I hate that he did that to you but I still love you. I want you to get past this, I want us to get past this. I want us to be able to be intimate again. I want to make love to you and make the memory of what happened fade away."

Veronica was amazed that Logan wasn't turned off from having sex with her after what had happened. She wasn't sure how long it would be before she felt comfortable enough for them to resume their sex life, but it was nice to know that Logan still wanted that with her.

"Veronica," Dr. Cooper said getting her attention. "What are you feeling now that you're trying to work through what happened?"

"I feel dirty," Veronica confessed. "I wish I could just wash what he did away and never have to think about it ever again. I haven't been sleeping because I see him every time I close my eye. I hear his voice telling me how good I feel."

"Veronica it's not uncommon for rape victims to feel like they can't get clean enough," Dr. Cooper told her. "The impulse will fade in time though."

"I know," Veronica told her. "I was raped when I was in high school and dealt with it on my own. I know that I'll get through it but when it happened then I wasn't conscious. I didn't know who had raped me and right now I'd give anything to not remember this rape either."

Dr. Cooper wrote down a few more notes and checked the time. "I think that we got a good start today," Dr. Cooper said moving to stand up. "I do want you to make an appointment to come see me Veronica. I know you've dealt with rape on your own, but I don't want you to have to do that this time. I want to help you get past this so you can focus on your baby."

"Thanks for coming," Veronica said from her bed.

"I want you to make an appointment too Logan," Dr. Cooper told him. "I'd like to see each of you individually before the three of us talk again."

"I'll set something up soon," Logan told her.

Dr. Cooper said goodbye to both of them and then left.

"Will you come lay with me?" Veronica asked Logan after the doctor left the room.

"Yeah," Logan said. He got up and moved to lay on the bed next to her. Veronica moved to lay on his chest. It felt nice to be in his arms again. She prayed they'd be able to get past this sooner rather than later. She didn't want to be scared to have sex with Logan. She had already been dealing with raging hormones before the rape. She wasn't sure she'd be able to make it through the rest of the pregnancy not being able to be intimate with Logan.