This was written for the 'Avatar Pants' challenge over at Promptbending. The idea was to pick one of the modified AtLA/LoK quotes from the game thread and turn it into a story. The quote I picked was actually one of my own submissions (post#41): Zuko: "We need pants, not tea." The real quote ("We need food, not tea") was taken from the episode 'The Cave of Two Lovers'.

If you'd like to learn more about the challenge (or Promptbending in general), you can find a link to the forum on my profile. ^_^

Zuko's Dilemma

Zuko was not happy. This wasn't exactly a rare occurrence for the prince, but for once his bad temper had nothing to do with Avatars, his banishment, or the fact that he was currently wandering the Earth Kingdom as a poor refugee. No, today his frustration had only one source, and that was the bearded old man next to him.

"This is all your fault, Uncle!" he snapped, curling his hands into fists. "If you had just listened to me in the first place, we wouldn't be in this mess!"

"How was I supposed to know the tea would be drugged?" Iroh responded mildly. "Huā had seemed like such a sweet little thing, and she and her father had been kind enough to give us shelter in their wagon during the storm."

"Yes," Zuko gritted out bitterly, "and then they drugged us and stole all of our belongings, including our ostrich-horse."

"Ah, you are only focussing on the negatives. Even you have to admit that the tea was excellent, and at least they didn't slit our throats while we were unconscious."

Zuko closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Thank you, Uncle. Now when I think about the fact that we lost our only means of transportation—not to mention our clothes—at least I can comfort myself with the fact that they didn't kill us as well."

Iroh smiled. "I knew you would come around."

The prince just growled in frustration and stomped ahead, wincing every now and then as the soles of his bare feet connected with the sharp stones littering the road. If he had thought that he had reached an impossible low when he had first tried on his peasant's attire and seen how, well, peasantish he looked, he had to be somewhere in the pits of ultimate shame right now. No boots, no swords, no tunic, and—

"What I wouldn't give for some ginger tea right now," Iroh sighed. "I still feel a little woozy from whatever it was Huā put in our drinks."

"We need pants, not tea!"

Iroh glanced down at the brown loincloth wrapped around his nether regions, which was the only thing he was wearing. "Pants would be nice," he admitted, and then he gave a broad grin. "But I still wouldn't say no to a hot cup of ginger tea."

Zuko made an exasperated noise and threw his hands up in the air, indicating that he washed his hands clean of the old man. He gave up. He really did. In fact, if he heard one more word about tea he was going to be sick—which was already a possibility considering he was stuck looking at his uncle wearing a loincloth. Let it be known that a chubby, wrinkly man wearing only a small amount of fabric for clothes was not a pretty sight.

"Stupid old man," Zuko muttered, quickening his pace. "Everything always has to be about tea with him, and look where his infernal obsession got us! Pantless in the middle of nowhere!"

It was something that Zuko could not forgive, for he had also not been able to escape the stripping process and was now similarly attired to his uncle, though his loincloth was green. The prince had never felt so humiliated. He had never felt so furious. He had never felt so—

"No," Zuko groaned, coming to a halt.

Iroh frowned. "Why have you stopped, Nephew? Did you see something?"

Wordlessly, Zuko pointed to where a familiar woman riding a shirshu could be seen making her way towards them. The prince saw the smile that curved her full lips when she recognised them, and he felt his cheeks warm in a hot blush. He was not surprised when she slowed right down until she was barring their way. June had always delighted in tormenting him.

"Well, well, well," the bounty hunter drawled in her husky voice, still with that disquieting smile playing on her lips, "if it isn't Prince Pouty and his creepy grandfather."

"Uncle, actually," Iroh interposed, as if this would make him more appealing to the younger woman. "And I must say that it is a pleasure to see y—"

"Whatever," June said dismissively, and then her eyes fixed back on Zuko. "What's the matter, Pouty? Lose your girlfriend and your clothes this time?"

"The waterbender is not my girlfriend!" Zuko snapped, clenching his hands into fists. "And I didn't lose my clothes; I just—"

"Decided to take a stroll in your undergarments?" June suggested, and her dark eyes drifted down his exposed body, lingering on the area where the green fabric covered. "Well, at least the view has improved this time."

"I—what?" he spluttered, cheeks flushed.

Her smile widened a fraction, but she said nothing and simply shifted her attention to Iroh. It must be noted that her gaze did not stray from his face. "So, old man, since Prince Pouty here is currently incapable of speech, why don't you tell me what happened?"

Iroh's eyes twinkled with amusement. "Very well. It all started when—"

"We don't have time for this!" Zuko snarled, finding his voice again. "Uncle, we have to keep moving if we want to catch up with those thieves." He threw a glare at June. "Unless you actually plan on making yourself useful, bounty hunter, I suggest you clear off so that we can carry on our way."

June's eyes narrowed and she slipped off the shirshu and came to stand in front of the prince, getting right up in his space. Zuko didn't budge, though he was frustratingly conscious of the disparity in their clothing. It was difficult to feel intimidating when you were only wearing a loincloth while the other was dressed in leathers and holding a whip. Especially when the other was an attractive female.

"Word from the wise, Pouty," June said in a dangerously silky voice. "You might be a prince, but that title means nothing now that you're a wanted man by the Fire Nation, and it means even less to me. I take orders from no one."

Zuko's chin jutted, and he opened his mouth to make what was no doubt going to be a very rude response when Iroh got there before him.

"You are absolutely right, June," Iroh said in a placating voice, "and we would not dream of ordering you to do anything." He gave her his most charming smile. "Though if you were kind enough to assist two old friends with your skills—of your own choice, of course—it would certainly be much appreciated."

June stared at them with a measuring look and then folded her arms. "Show me the colour of your money and then we might talk."

Zuko let out a huff of frustration. "You know we don't have any money! We wouldn't even be having this conversation if we still had money!"

She gave a careless shrug. "Then I guess you'll stay pantless and I'll keep enjoying my earnings."

"Wait!" Iroh cried, before she could turn to leave. "We can't pay you now, but we will be able to pay you later. Isn't that right, Nephew?"

Zuko blinked as he thought of their meagre collection of copper and silver pieces. "Uh, sure."

June raised one finely arched eyebrow. It was obvious that she didn't believe them.

"All we're asking is that you take us to the thieves who stole our belongings," Iroh continued, ignoring her scepticism. "The wagon can't have got too far ahead, and—"

"Or I could just collect the bounty on your heads," June suggested. "That would get me my money."

Zuko and Iroh exchanged an uneasy glance. It had suddenly occurred to both that capturing them might be the very reason for why June was even travelling on this road. She had no allegiance to any nation—only to the highest bidder for her services. Right now, Zuko and Iroh were far from the highest bidders.

"Don't look so pale," June said with a laugh. "You didn't think I'd really turn in my favourite royal clients, did you? Who would I go to for my entertainment?"

Zuko's mouth twisted into a scowl and he shoved past her, fuming at the fact that she had dared to make a mockery of him. Again. "Forget this, Uncle. It's obvious that she's not going to help. Let's just go."

June smiled lazily. "Wait."

The prince paused, gritting his teeth.

"You know, it just occurred to me that I still owe you a favour for the abbey incident."

Gold eyes locked with brown. "Just what are you saying?"

"I'll help you with your pants problem." Her gaze flickered to Iroh. "Anything to make Uncle Lazy over there put some clothes on."

Iroh chuckled heartily, taking no offence at this statement. Zuko just glowered.

"How can we know that we can trust you?" he demanded, folding his arms across his chest.

She leapt back onto Nyla and stared down at him with an amused glint in her eyes. "You can't, of course, but then you don't have much of a choice unless you want to try catch up to that wagon on your own."

Zuko sighed in resignation and jumped up to sit behind her on the saddle. Iroh soon joined them, taking the seat behind the prince.

"Better hold on, Pouty," June taunted. "We wouldn't want you to lose anything else now, would we?"

Zuko was about to respond when she cracked her whip down with a snap, making the shirshu jolt into action and Zuko grip her waist with a gasp as he was almost unseated from the motion. His cheeks warmed as he heard the bounty hunter's laughter echo in his ears.

This just really wasn't turning out to be his day.