CHAPTER 51

At 2:00 pm, Blaine called Kurt when he hadn't heard from him. Late lunch was fine, but he was beginning to wonder what was going on…or if anything was going on.

"Hello?" Kurt said, out of breath.

"Kurt? It's me, are you—"

"Oh, Blaine! Lunch, I totally forgot, sorry! David called and wanted me to bring in everything that was finished. What sucks is they all need the final fitting with the models and I'll have to lug all of this stuff back to the apartment. Good news, though, he's good with having Jeff on board. I showed David the work that he's done so far and he's thrilled with it. He's ok with paying him under the table for now, too, so he won't have a paper trail or anything. Listen, I have to run, they're moving things and I don't want any of my designs to be destroyed if they - HEY! Be careful with that!" Kurt yelled, and then the call was disconnected.

Blaine stood there, momentarily dumbfounded, then hurt, then angry. He didn't like feeling like he'd been blown off. Nobody did, really, but he felt like he'd been overly patient with Kurt when he needed it and now he was just being looked over as if he wasn't important. Blaine would have to make it a point to get Kurt alone soon and talk to him about it. Letting it fester wasn't good for either of them. For now, though, he was hungry and needed something to eat, so he headed out and walked down the street to the deli on the corner.

Jax watched Kurt carrying all sort of garment bags and clothing into the old warehouse building, the perky blonde behind him with his hands just as full. The cabbie waited while they made a second trip, then Kurt paid the man and they went inside. Minutes passed and he saw Kurt walk up to a corner window on the third floor with the blonde guy, talking animatedly and gesturing around behind him briefly. He wasn't sure what this place was, as there was no signage on the outside of the building, but he aimed to find out. Kurt had barely left the apartment since their phone call and he wondered if this would be par for the course. Was this his workplace? He'd have to stick around and find out. Knowing the routine of your prey was vital.

Inside the deli sat a dejected looking Sebastian, checking his phone and texting someone, it appeared. When Blaine walked in, he glanced up and smiled, but it wasn't his normal shit eating grin, it was more of a weak attempt at his meerkat face. Blaine had planned on grabbing something and taking it home, but when Sebastian waved him over and told him to have a seat, he saw no real reason not to.

"We have to stop meeting this way, Blaine." He smirked.

"Yeah, yeah, I hear ya." Blaine grinned, plopping down in the booth seat across from Seb.

"I was beginning to wonder if you ever left the building other than to go to work?" Sebastian smirked, once again. "To what do I owe the honor or your presence – and without Hummel as well?"

"I was supposed to have lunch with Kurt but he got called into his office and had to take a shit ton of stuff in, so he had to cancel. Well, he didn't actually cancel, he just sort of forgot and when I called him….you know what, nevermind. Why aren't you working or out of the country somewhere?" Blaine asked with a grin.

"Nope, not changing the subject. You mean to tell me Hummel's blowing you off? Well, at least he's blowing something, even if it's not what you'd prefer…" Seb trailed off, taking a bite of his sandwich.

The waitress approached and took Blaine's order so they'd stopped talking for a minute while she was there. Blaine didn't answer, but reached over and stole a few potato chips from Seb's plate instead.

"Sure, take 'em all, but you're going to answer my question. What's his deal, anyway? The guy's afraid of his own shadow, you can't touch him, he clearly hates me with a passion and I haven't done anything to him, and now he's acting like he doesn't have time for the one person that he seems to like…the one person that's clearly been patient with his bullshit? Not cool, Blaine. Not cool." Sebastian said, shaking his head slowly and taking another bite of his lunch.

"There's a lot going on there, Seb. It's not my story to tell, but he's been through some stuff…a lot of stuff and it left him pretty traumatized. The patience is necessary until he can get himself back to where he was before it all happened. If work calls, he has to go I guess. And I will continue to BE patient because I care about him and that's what he needs." Blaine answered levelly.

"What about what you need?"

"Meaning? I'm fine. I don't need anything. I have a great apartment, a fun job, food in my fridge and a roof over my head. I have friends around me, my brother is here close by…" Blaine began.

"It's a damn shame that your brother is straight. Think he'd consider experimenting?" Seb interrupted.

"What? No! Oh my God, you just don't give a damn whose pants you're in, do you?" Blaine said, unsure if he wanted to be irritated or amused.

"Oh I care, I'm picky and all that, but when I see something I like, I'm gonna go after it. Make no mistake, Blaine. If something interests me, I'll get it." He smiled. 'The cat that ate the canary' was all Blaine could think of when he saw his smirking grin.

"Well, as 'uncool' as it may have been, I will try to be the understanding boyfriend and give him a little leeway while they're getting started at work. There's a lot going on and I don't want to stand in the way." Blaine told him.

"Yeah, but back to what YOU need, Blaine. Seriously, you've been here how long…months…and you haven't had a single guy back to your place the whole time. I know, I've been paying attention. The only guy I've seen in or out is Hummel and that Jeff character that's staying there incognito. He has a nice ass, by the way, so if he gets bored—"

"Seb, NO. Just no!" Blaine laughed. At this point, he was beginning to think that maybe everything that Sebastian said wasn't all serious. Maybe sexual innuendo was his way of breaking the ice? He couldn't possibly be serious all the time about how many guys he'd propositioned…or….whatever. Could he? Blaine hoped not.

"And that Nick guy…what's his story? Is he in real estate or what? I thought him and Blondie were an item, but that seems off at this point as well. You guys are bringing down the whole vibe of the building!" Seb said, as if he was seriously put out.

"Ok, listen….Nick's dad is giving him and Jeff a hard time. Jeff left so that Nick would work things out with his family and maybe get his job back. But Nick doesn't want his job back, he wants to open his own business, which he has the resources to do, but he wants Jeff back more than anything else. Jeff gave his word and won't go back on it, so he's just laying low here trying to avoid Mr. Duval's prying eyes and not wanting to be far from Nick. I know it's all crazy, but it's not my life. If Jeff needs me, I'll be here for him. I owe him that." Blaine explained.

"Yes, you do, don't you?" Seb said, not looking up from his menu. Blaine just gave him a curious look.

"Meaning?" he asked, but they were interrupted.

When the waitress brought Blaine's food, Seb ordered dessert and sat eating it while Blaine had lunch. They continued to talk for a while, Seb finishing his sundae while Blaine finished his sandwich and ordered his own sundae. He pumped Seb for information on his job, but he wasn't very forthcoming with details. Apparently he was often out of town, sometimes for weeks at a time if the governor was overseas for anything. He was a member of the same gym Blaine went to, but he seldom went there, preferring the gym at work instead. He'd lived in New York for 8 years now, having moved there right before college with his parents, who now lived out of state, much to his relief. He was the middle child of three. He was seriously against long term relationships, mostly, Blaine gathered, because he wasn't very good at them. But what kept popping up, over and over, was Hunter's name, which Blaine found odd.

"So tell me about Hunter. He spends a lot of time with Kurt, but I don't know him all that well." Blaine asked as they both sat at the table stuffed and satisfied.

"Nothing much to tell. He and I started dating. We met at a function the governor attended where Hunter's parents were the hosts. I nearly got fired. His parents have no idea he's gay…and I often wonder if he'll ever tell them. This is just one more reason it would never work out with us. I'm not changing who I am for anyone, and I'm certainly not going to hide from his parents. He doesn't want to cause problems and he's convinced his parents would have a stroke if they knew, so he keeps quiet about it…but at the same time, he wants me to settle down, not screw whoever I want to and be with him exclusively. What do I get out of it? He's not ready for that, and neither am I."

"Whoa, wait, hold up….you nearly got fired? Do tell!" Blaine laughed. Seb shook his head and rolled his eyes.

"I was working, standing near the governor, doing my thing. When Hunter…" he paused. "He came down the stairs and I couldn't take my eyes off him…just couldn't. He was wearing a tux that fit him so well it was probably illegal. I was drawn to him right away, just…it was like I was floating towards him. My feet were moving of their own accord and I just…I had to talk to him. In the meantime, I walked right into my boss and upended my drink into his chest." Sebastian laughed, remembering. "I helped clean up the mess I'd made and went to find him…to find Hunter. He was outside on this terrace that overlooked the backyard and…my God, he was like an angel standing there. Beautiful…just…I made an ass of myself trying to talk to him. When I realized that I was babbling and not making sense, I freaked out and nearly ran…but not before stealing the most mind numbing kiss I've ever had."

"You did NOT!" Blaine gasped.

"I did. The one truly amazing moment in my life, and I couldn't hold on to it." Seb said, clearly remembering that night. He chuckled a bit, then continued. "I'd given him my number and prayed that he'd call. Turns out Hunter was totally freaked out by me…he hadn't…he wasn't. Wow this is harder to talk about than I thought." Sebastian said, running his hands through his hair. "He um, he hadn't really admitted to himself, yet, that he was gay, certainly wasn't going to come out with that information to me, and didn't know what to do with the feelings I made him feel I guess? I suppose I should have known then that it wouldn't be a smooth road."

"So how long ago was that?" Blaine wanted to know.

"Uh….'bout two years I guess?" Seb said distractedly.

"Do you wish it hadn't happened? That you hadn't met him?" Blaine asked, quietly now, as it seemed the conversation had taken a serious turn.

"No, I don't regret any of the time I spent with him. He's an amazing lover…absolutely amazing, and he's a really great person…much better than someone like me deserves, but it just can't be, so I have to get over that and move on, right?" Sebastian said with a little tilt of his head and a sad grin.

"But you miss him, don't you?" Blaine said, kindness showing in his eyes as he smiled at Sebastian.

"What? No. I don't. He's just another guy. There are plenty of them out there, right?" Seb said, trying to sound aloof, but failing miserably.

"Uh huh…good try. We're two peas in a pod, aren't we? Can't have all that we want, but we keep hanging on thinking it might change soon, so we should stand by." Blaine grinned, shaking his head and examining the Formica table top as if it was the most important thing in the world. Seb was quiet, introspective almost. Blaine could tell he was thinking about something and it was eating at him, but Seb didn't offer anything, so it was left alone.

When the check came, Seb grabbed it and insisted on paying. Blaine said he'd grab the check next time, which made Sebastian laugh, thinking that there'd be a 'next time' at some point. They walked back home, side by side, in silence. Both were lost in their own world, unsure of where they stood now with the people most important in their lives.

Dear Nicky,

I got your letter from Blaine, and I'd be a liar if I said I wasn't sobbing through most of it. I miss you, too, and it's killing me…just killing me. I want so badly to be with you that I can barely think straight, but I can't, Nicky. I just can't. I gave your father my word that I'd stay out of your life if he gave you your job back and stopped harassing you. I know the harassment was about me being in the way…in your life at all…so I'm hopeful that things have changed or that they will change soon. I know how much you love them, Nicky, and I can't be the reason there's tension between you and everyone in your family.

I often wonder what it is…what it was about me that made him hate me so strongly right off the bat. I doubt that we'll ever really know…I won't, anyway. I won't apologize for loving you. It was easy to do, and I fell hard and fast. Had anyone ever told me that I'd have a moment of "love at first sight", I would have called them a liar. I've never believed in that kind of thing, but I do now. From the moment I saw you, touched you, you were mine, and I was yours. I only wish it could have ended that way. You know, as well as I do, that I can't interfere in your life and make things difficult for you. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. Your happiness is way too important to me.

For this reason, Nicky, I need…I need for you to move on. I want you to remember me as a person you loved and had fun with for a short time. I want you to be happy, though, and we'll never be happy if we're looking over our shoulders forever. I gave him my word, Nicky, and I can't go back on it. It's all I have left, really, my word as a man, and once I've given it, I can't go back. You need to forget about me and find someone else. Don't think this is easy for me to say. For God's sake, I'm sitting here bawling and my heart is breaking. I don't want to ever see it…seeing you with someone else would kill me, so I'll keep my distance and wish you well. Keep me in your heart, Nicky, and I'll keep you in mine. I'll always love you, but I know I can't have you. Do great things, babe. Be everything you want to be. Make me proud.

I love you,

Jeff

Sliding the flap inside the envelope, Jeff walked out of his room as calmly as possible and handed the letter to Blaine. This was easily the most selfless thing he'd ever done, and he never thought it would make him feel so utterly miserable inside. His chest hurt, his head hurt, his entire body was screaming for him to take the envelope and rip that letter to shreds, but he couldn't.

"Give this to him at work tonight?" he said, his voice shaky.

"Yeah…ok. Jeff? Are you…what did you say? In the letter…Jeff?" But Jeff had just shook his head and retreated to his room. He'd never hated himself more for giving his word to someone. He despised and detested Nick's father for his hatred, and he wanted nothing more than to give the man a piece of his mind, but he couldn't. Instead, he sat on the floor with his back against his bed and had himself a good, long cry.

Blaine stood outside the door, his hand raised to knock, but he couldn't do it when he heard Jeff sobbing. He couldn't fathom the pain he was feeling and he felt helpless to do anything about it. He seriously considered opening the letter and reading it, but he knew that would be wrong. What Jeff wrote was personal and private, and unless he told Blaine to read it, he wouldn't do it. He just hoped Jeff hadn't said something he couldn't fix or take back.

"I'm sorry I had to cancel for tonight." Maggie said into the phone.

"It's ok, honey, I understand. The little man's not feeling well and he has to be your priority. I get that. I'm on board, ok? No worries." Coop said with an obvious smile in his voice. Maggie giggled. "What? What's funny?"

"Nothing…." She said, still giggling.

"No, you tell me, or I'll come over there and get it out of you!" he laughed.

"No can do. It's my little secret." She grinned again into the phone.

"Margaret…don't push me!" he laughed.

"You sound like my mother when you say that!" she said.

"Baby I want to say things to you that would make your mother faint." He teased, his voice a low murmur.

"C-coop!" Maggie replied, scandalized, yet laughing and hissing at him into the phone. "You can't just say things like that!"

"I think I just did…now tell me why you were giggling like a blushing schoolgirl!"

She paused, thinking about it, but figuring it was better to do it now, while he was on the phone and not right in front of her. "You called me 'honey'…and it made me happy." She whispered.

"I…I did, didn't I? Does that …is that ok? If it makes you happy, it's ok, right?" he stuttered out. He'd never been more aware of his words and actions than he was with Maggie. He didn't want to do anything at all to upset her or make her nervous. He wanted her around for a long, long time…in fact, when he thought about it night after night, forever was sounding pretty tempting. She had come into his life and rocked his world, and he was grateful for it. He adored her.

"It's absolutely ok, Coop. Can we, uh…can we reschedule for another night, maybe? I think we need to discuss telling Blaine, ok? I know you're uneasy with it, but…I feel badly…as if I'm lying to him by omission or something."

"You're not lying to him, Mags, we're just…keeping it on the down low? Is that so bad?" Coop asked.

"No, I suppose not, but I'm wondering why. I mean, I know I'm not your normal type, apparently…super model beautiful, amazing job, penthouses, etc. Oh….is…is that it? Oh God, of course it is. You're "dating down"…I didn't…I wasn't thinking." She said softly, almost thinking out loud now. Of course he wouldn't want to bring her around in front of anyone who might be used to his normal dates.

"What? No! Maggie, that's not even funny, and it's so far from the truth that I can't even believe that crossed your mind! What in the world?" Cooper soothed her. "Honey, no….it's not that. I'm terrified of what he'll tell YOU about ME!"

"What could possibly be so bad, Coop?" she asked, not even remotely afraid of his answer.

"Maggie…Love…I've done a lot of things in my life I'm not proud of…and most of them are in this little black book here next to my bed…and some are in my phone now that technology has caught up but…." He paused because she was snickering.

"Why are you telling me this as if it's something new? We've discussed it already." Maggie asked.

"Are the kids asleep?" he asked out of the blue?

"Yeah…for about half an hour now, why?"

"I need to see you. I'm coming over. Be there in about 25 minutes." Cooper said before hanging up.

"Coop! But wait...I'm…" and then he was gone. Maggie took a quick look around the place and started running around straightening up. 15 minutes had passed before it dawned on her that she probably looked like a train wreck, so she ran into the bathroom to freshen up. Right on time, Coop knocked softly on the door. She checked the peephole and nearly sighed at the attractive sight on the other end of the small glass, then she pulled the door open.

"Well hello, handsome." She grinned, pulling him in for a hug.

"Hello yourself, beautiful." He said, leaning down to kiss her. He started to let her go, then pulled her back in and ran a hand up her back, tugging her close. "My God, I can't get enough of you, Mags…." He breathed out, still holding her closely.

"Umm….you can uh…you can come in if you want to?" she grinned shyly. He'd only been there once, and he hadn't come in, just waited outside in the cab for her to come down. He took his time looking around, smiling at the pictures on the wall of the kids, running his fingers over their drawings on the fridge. There were toys on the floor, neatly stacked, as well as dishes drying on the kitchen counter. It was homey, it was tidy and it was…it was Maggie's place. Finally he turned to her, grabbed her hands and tugged her down to the sofa with him, facing her and looking straight into her eyes.

"I uh…Maggie, I don't want you to think, for one more minute, that you don't 'measure up' to what I'm supposedly used to. I am not now, nor will I ever be, ashamed of you or embarrassed to be with you. You're a beautiful woman with two terrific kids. There's more love in your heart than anyone I've ever known. Just…please…don't ever think you're not worthy, because you are….you are SO special to me." He finished. Maggie's eyes were wet and she was a little unsteady. He was holding her hands between them now, and she was glad, because she was feeling as if she might float away.

"Coop….you don't need to say those things…" she began.

"Oh, but I do. See, it's really important for me to tell you…and for you to know, because it's true. Every little thing I've said is true. You're an amazing woman and a terrific mom and…and….and I'm kind of falling in love with you." He said, ducking his head as if she wouldn't want to hear it.

"You…you're…but…Cooper?" she managed to get out, finally. Her heart was pounding and she was certain he could see it beating out of her chest. In fact, Helen could probably hear it across the hall. Coop leaned in and kissed her thoroughly on the mouth, caressing her cheek and winding his fingers through her hair. She moaned a bit when his tongue slipped between her lips and then just reveled in the feeling of this amazing man holding her closely. "I'm sure you say that to all the girls." She snickered, hiding her face in his shoulder.

"I uh…." He said, rubbing at the back of his neck. "I've never actually told a woman that…and it's sort of freaking me out, so I hope that's ok…I don't mean to rush you and you surely don't have to say it as well, but I'm just…I'm so enamored of you. I'm in awe of the way you handle things, the way you manage to stay so fresh and beautiful and vibrant when the world around you turns to shit. I love the way you always put the kids first, and I want more than anything to meet them as your boyfriend, not as Blaine's brother. I want to be in your life, Maggie…all of it. If that means we tell Blaine first thing in the morning, then we do, alright?"

She just shook her head, unable to say words, overwhelmed with happiness at his declarations. In her heart, she knew she'd fallen for Cooper as well, and she didn't know if it was the time to tell him. Would it seem like she was only saying it because he had?

"So um, I was hoping maybe we could just watch a movie or something tonight? Hang out, talk, I'll let you grope me if you want?" he said casually. When she looked up, her eyes wide and her mouth gaping open, he laughed out loud until she put her hand over his mouth and tackled him back on the sofa. He took advantage and pulled her close, holding the woman he'd fallen in love with and peppering her face with kisses.

Somewhere around midnight, after the movie ended, he got up to go and said he should be on his way. Maggie protested, stating that she was off work the following day, and couldn't he stay just a bit longer? She held him close and kissed him, wanting him to stay.

"Mags, I'd love to hang out longer, but…I can't. I can't stay here and keep holding you and be the gentleman you need me to be. I'm a weak man, babe!" he laughed.

"So you're leaving because you're too hot and bothered?!" she exclaimed in a shouted whisper.

"I'm leaving because I want you so bad that I don't trust myself to remain a gentleman. When you're ready, we'll go there, but until then, I'll be on my way with your virtue still intact." He grinned, kissing her on the nose again.

"And..um…if I'm ready now?" she said shyly, unable to take her eyes off the floor. She heard his quick intake of breath and wanted to glance up, but she didn't dare.

"Mags…don't play with me. It's not fair." He grinned.

"I do believe it's YOU who won't play with ME, Cooper Anderson." She stated a bit more firmly.

"Maggie…..honey?"

"It's ok, I mean if you don't want to, we can.." she began, but was cut off by a growl from Cooper when he turned from the door and scooped her into his arms, carrying her down the hallway to her room. Gently kicking the door closed, he set out to worship and please her in any way he could. He'd never been more nervous in his life. This was important….this meant something.

"You sounded good tonight, man!" Blaine said, slapping Nick on the back as they walked off stage. "And you look like you won the lottery or something, what's up with that?" he smiled widely.

"Good mood I guess…the best mood I've been in since…since he left, but it's because of him. I feel him. He's not so far away, I can just tell." Nick said with a wink.

Blaine wanted to panic. He didn't know what to say or how to react to that, so he just shook his head and said "well, your guess is as good as mine, I suppose!"

"I suppose…" Nick echoed, still smiling.

"OH! I almost forgot, he'd have killed me. I got this today…from Jeff…for you." Blaine said, handing Nick the envelope. Nick's eyes flew open at the idea of something from Jeff…a note, anything at all. He nearly ripped it to shreds trying to open the envelope and then whipped out the sheet of paper inside. He leaned against the wall reading, a smile on his lips, but only for a short time. Blaine watched as his smile faltered, then faded into sadness that he couldn't even fathom.

"No….NO!" he said, angrily, and shoved the letter back in the envelope before slipping it into his pocket. "You tell him I said no, Blaine. Tonight, right now. Call him, I know you can. You tell him I said no way in hell am I giving up and moving on!" he yelled. Blaine was backed against the wall where he'd retreated when Nick charged him after he read Jeff's words, both hands up to his shoulders as if he thought Nick would accost him in some way.

"Dude…ok. Alright. I don't know what he said, but…hey… calm down. We'll….we'll work on it. I'll help you, ok? What's wrong? What happened?" Blaine said, trying to calm a furious Nick. Allyse had stuck her head in the door with a smile and fled when Nick exploded. Now he could see Finn and Joe hovering at the door, wondering if Blaine and Nick were arguing, and if not, what was going on. Nick never yelled. He was always calm, always collected, and now he was clearly pissed off, and Finn would swear he saw a tear swiped away quickly. Nick was pacing and Blaine's stomach was in knots.

"He…he wants me to….he said move on, date someone…someone else. Blaine? You know I can't. If he doesn't want me, that's one thing, but then I'll just be alone. I don't want anyone else, Blaine. Tell him…please…tell him!" Nick said, finally breaking down. He slumped into a chair in the break room and banged his head on the table, his shoulders shaking and silent tears escaping. Blaine sat next to him and slung an arm over his shoulder.

"I'll talk to him, Nick. I swear to God I will….I'll tell him. But you know how stubborn he is, and if he thinks he's doing the right thing for you, he won't listen to me. Hell, he never listens to me anyway, but…I promise, I'll try. You have my word, ok?" Nick just nodded, his head still down on the table. "Let's get you home, man. Cab's on me…I'll ride with you." Blaine said, hauling Nick to his feet.

They made their way out into the humid night air and flagged down a taxi, Nick slipping in first, like a wet noodle, and immediately resting his head back and closing his eyes. He mumbled out his address and the car pulled away from the Dive. They rode in silence until they reached Nick's building. Blaine asked the car to wait while he walked Nick inside the glass doors. "We'll make him listen, ok? We won't let him give up. I know he still loves you, Nick. I know it…we just have to make him see. Get some sleep, man." He said, patting Nick on the back at the elevators.

"Thanks for…that." He said, gesturing toward the cab with his hand. "I appreciate it." The most forced smile Blaine had ever seen covered Nick's face as he turned and got into the elevator. Blaine sighed, unsure what he was going to be able to do.

As Blaine walked out, he was surprised to hear Terrance speak, although he wasn't sure at first if he was speaking to him or not. "Beg pardon?" Blaine said, turning back to Terrance, who looked very formal and stared straight ahead.

"I said please give my best to Mr. Sterling, sir. His presence is dearly missed around here, and not just by Mr. Duval." He said with a sad grin.

"I'll do that. I'll tell him." Blaine nodded and smiled back, then got back into the car and headed home.

A/N Welcome to the newbies. I'm so thrilled to have you on board! By all means, tell me what you're thinking...I freak out a tiny bit each time a notification pops up in my email. You guys just make my day, every one of you! I've already gotten some very sweet messages from a few new readers, and I just love it! :) Thanks, again, for sticking around and continuing to read my little bit of crazy! Have a great weekend, everyone!