"Alright," Emily sighed, looking over her team. "Luke and Spencer, go talk to the family. Rossi, Tara, and Stephen, go to the crime scene. Let's start there and see what we can learn. JJ and I will stay here and keep going through these reports. Hopefully when you get back, we'll all have some new information to share."
The team nodded and started filing out of the conference room. They'd come to Ohio on a case involving missing children, so the team's energy was low. In addition to the violent and terrible case, Emily was still getting her footing as the new Unit Chief. No one had expected her to be given the position and it made the whole team a little unsteady.
JJ was pinning pictures up on the corkboard that the Canton police department had given them. She pushed in the last pin and turned around, watching the team leave. When the door closed behind them, it suddenly felt like the room was three times bigger. The 'Conference Room' was tiny, barely big enough for the oval table in the center, a small media cart in one corner, and the large corkboard. There weren't even any windows. It was practically a supply closet.
Looking at Emily, JJ watched as she sighed heavily and dropped into a worn rolling chair. She looked incredibly stressed. JJ knew that she was worried about being a good leader. Most of their talk at dinner and breakfast was Emily trying to figure out why she was given the position.
No matter how much JJ told her that she was responsible, fair, strong, and kind, Emily just panicked that she'd never be as good of a Unit Chief as Hotch. JJ knew that she'd calm down after a while and realize that she didn't have to mimic Hotch to be a good Chief. Emily would find her own rhythm and style.
Emily rested her elbows on the conference table and looked at JJ. "I'm never going to get used to that."
"To what?" JJ asked, wandering over to a folding chair and sitting down.
"Giving instructions," Emily answered. She started picking at her fingernails. "Should I have sent Luke to the crime scene and Tara to the family?"
JJ smirked. "Probably."
"JJ!" Emily reached out to smack her arm. "You're supposed to be on my side!"
"I am, Emily!" Putting her hands on Emily's knees, she rolled her wife closer. "I'm just teasing."
Pouting, Emily sniffed delicately. "Well, don't. I'm too wound up for that."
With a grin, JJ took one of Emily's hands in both of hers. "I knew you would be, and so I brought you a gift."
"A gift?" Emily repeated, confused. After 10 years together, JJ could still surprise her. "What gift?"
JJ nodded down to her lap, raising an eyebrow. Emily looked at JJ's crotch, heat pooling in her stomach before she even saw the gift. JJ had gotten dressed in the hotel room bathroom that morning, while Emily dressed in the bedroom. She hadn't seen her take her harness in there, or her favorite dildo to hard pack with.
There was a slight bulge in her pants and Emily knew that JJ must be wearing boxer briefs over the harness, dildo tucked away. It was risky to hard pack at work, and JJ rarely did it, but when she did, Emily always knew she was in for a good day. Usually, she got prior warning.
"You…" Emily's voice trailed off as JJ put her hand on the firm bulge. "Here?"
"We have until the team gets back," JJ reminded her. "I think that's at least 45 minutes, don't you?"
Emily licked her lips, shaking off JJ's hands so she could unbutton her fly and pull the zipper down. "A gift."
JJ hummed, lifting her hips, so Emily could adjust her pants and underwear to free her dick. "A gift for both of us, but there's one caveat."
"What?" Emily mumbled as she slid off her chair to her knees. "Anything."
Pushing her hands into Emily's salt-and-pepper hair, she guided her forward. Emily wrapped one hand around the base of the dildo and slowly licked along its length. Flicking her eyes up to meet JJ's blue ones, she sucked on the tip, making a low, grateful noise in her throat.
A lot had changed in 10 years. Emily was greying now, her hair growing greyer and greyer over the years. She didn't mind, and JJ seemed to love it. She still kept it long, flaunting her age and beauty. Emily was not going to be ashamed of growing old. Her grey hair just reminded her that she was still alive.
JJ kept her hair short now, keeping it neat and easy to maintain. It broke her mother's heart to see her wearing suits, men's haircuts, and a bare face, but JJ had given up most of her femininity years ago. She knew how much Emily loved seeing her sweaty, muscular, and masculine. Emily supported her when she wanted to soft pack or wear a binder. It wasn't all the time, but JJ loved having the option.
Emily slid her mouth down, taking JJ's length easily. Sucking dicks had never been something that interested her, but the way JJ's hands tightened in her hair and the way her hips just barely thrust into Emily's throats was so fucking hot. She loved watching how affected JJ was by her touch.
"Fuck," JJ sighed as Emily lifted her head again. "You look so good with your lips around me."
Emily moaned at the comment, sitting back on her heels and looking up at JJ with wide eyes. "Are we really going to do this? In a conference room?"
Leaning forward, JJ cupped Emily's face in her hands. "Let me help you relax. You're so stressed about leading the team. Let me give you a break, just for a little while. You don't have to drown under the weight of control."
Biting her lip, Emily nodded. Under most circumstances, she liked being in charge, but it could feel suffocating. Emily spent so much of her life keeping herself under control, just maintaining her composure and calm. JJ let her give that up. Her wife let her be herself and no one else.
"Okay," Emily whispered, leaning into JJ's palm. "45 minutes."
"Probably only 40 now." JJ tugged on Emily's face, prompting her to stand. "Take your pants off," she ordered. "We're going to see how many times I can make you come. I'm going to leave you a mess."
Emily shivered, but she obeyed JJ and opened her tight jeans, stepping out of her shoes at the same time. She pulled them, and her underwear, off quickly and climbed into JJ's lap. The dildo was pressed between them, teasing them both. JJ couldn't wait to be buried inside Emily, and Emily was already wet, ready for JJ to fuck her.
"Please," Emily breathed, dipping her head down. "Touch me."
JJ kissed her slowly, their mouths so familiar with each other. Her tongue trailed along Emily's lips until they parted, and then slipped inside. With a groan, Emily put her hands on JJ's shoulders, bracing her feet on the cheap carpet of the conference room. JJ's hands ran over Emily's bare thighs, manicured nails lightly scratching her sensitive skin.
Breaking the kiss, JJ met Emily's eyes as a hand drifted between Emily's legs, finding her hot and wet. "You're doing a great job," JJ told her, dipping a fingertip into Emily. "You're such a great leader, and a great wife."
Emily blinked, head tilting back as she tried to keep her composure. The power of JJ's compliments never diminished. JJ slowly pushed a finger into her, curling it inside her and making her mouth fall open. After all these years, JJ knew exactly how to drive her crazy.
"Baby," Emily moaned, lifting her head to look down at her wife, "I love you."
"I love you, too," JJ answered quickly, adding a second finger. "But now is not the time for that kind of talk."
Emily crashed their mouths together, cupping the back of JJ's head. Picking up speed, JJ fucked her with her fingers, her thumb hitting Emily's clit with each stroke. She loved the way Emily's hips started moving, riding JJ's fingers, needing more.
"Touch yourself," JJ ordered, pulling out of the kiss. "Outside only."
When Emily started rubbing her clit, JJ reached into her pocket to pull out a condom. She tore it open easily and rolled it down the dildo. Emily's breath sped up, soft gasps escaping perfectly red lips. From her other pocket, JJ pulled a small packet of lube. She ripped it open, dripping it right onto the dildo.
Emily watched closely as JJ stroked herself, making sure everything was ready. Moaning loudly in encouragement, the Unit Chief pushed herself onto her toes, getting ready to take JJ. Grinning, JJ grabbed Emily's hips and guided her forward. Reaching between them, Emily took JJ's dick in her hand, lined it up, and sat on it, taking it all in one smooth motion.
"God," Emily whined, hips twitching as she adjusted to the size. "It's perfect."
"Ride, or I'm taking it away," JJ threatened. All hint of sympathy about Emily's stress was gone, and she was ready to take what she wanted. She wanted to see Emily come until she cried. "You have to earn it."
Emily immediately started moving, grinding her hips and moving in tight circles. Strong hands gripped her ass, forcing her to keep a fast pace. Head falling back, Emily put her hands on JJ's knees, arching her back and giving in to her desire. It didn't matter that she was Unit Chief. When JJ was inside her, Emily was just her girl. Moaning, Emily shifted her feet so she could bounce on JJ's dick, gasping every time it hit that place deep inside her.
"There we go," JJ chuckled, moving her hands to push up Emily's blouse. "That's a good girl."
She lifted Emily's bra, freeing her breasts. Leaning forward, JJ took a hard nipple in her mouth, licking and biting. Emily moans loudly, every part of her body trembling. It was really hard to keep up her pace, but she knew that if she slowed down, JJ would scold her.
"Keep going, Emily," JJ said encouragingly as she switched her focus to Emily's other breast. "Show me how much you want it."
"I want it," Emily gasped, slamming down onto JJ's dick. She rocked for a moment to catch her breath, before shifting her weight back onto her hands and starting to ride again. "Fuck. You feel so good."
JJ licked the sensitive underside of Emily's breast, letting her do all the work. If Emily proved herself, JJ would fuck her, but she had to earn the privledge. "You can touch yourself," JJ said. She sucked on Emily's breast, leaving a dark red mark. "Come for me."
Nodding eagerly, Emily reached between her legs to rub her clit again. The combination of her own fingers and JJ's dick was pushing her closer and closer to the edge. Knowing that JJ was watching, and wanting to perform for her, Emily let herself whimper and moan, showing her appreciation. This was exactly what she needed.
"Stop."
With a surprised whine, Emily stopped moving, halfway down JJ's dick. Her fingers twitched, desperate to keep going. She was so close to the edge, but JJ had given her an order and she had to obey.
"Wow," JJ sighed, smiling up at her, "Unit Chief Emily Prentiss is at my mercy."
Emily's hips jerked at the use of her title. "Fuck," she gasped, moving her hands to JJ's shoulders. Her thighs quivered with the effort to stay on her toes. "JJ, please."
"I don't know…" JJ clutched Emily's hips, shifting slightly so she could plant her feet on the ground. Emily whimpered as she was jostled. "What do you want from me?"
"Fuck me, JJ. Please." Emily's eyes fluttered shut. "I'm begging you."
JJ smirked. "Well, if you're begging…"
She shoved her hips upward, slamming into Emily and knocking the wind out of her. JJ kept thrusting up into Emily, watching as her breasts bounced and her chest heaved. Her grip on JJ's shoulders tightened painfully as she struggled to breathe and JJ kept her eyes fixed on Emily's face, waiting for her to fall apart.
Emily came with a strangled cry, hips bucking wildly against JJ's thrusts as she tried to prolong her orgasm. She babbled nonsense, barely aware that she was making any noise at all. After a moment, JJ stopped her movement, letting JJ slide down the dildo to sit on JJ's lap and catch her breath.
Her head dropped onto JJ's shoulder as she panted. Gently, JJ wrapped her arms around Emily, just holding her. Her wife was still twitching, hips occasionally moving against the dildo inside her.
"Feeling warmed up?" JJ murmured into her ear.
"Hmm?" Emily lifted her head, meeting JJ's eyes. "Warmed up?"
JJ's eyes drifted down to Emily's lips. "I told you that we were going to see how many times you can come before the team comes back."
Swallowing hard, Emily leaned back. "I don't know if I can handle that."
"Well," JJ said, clicking her tongue, "it's not up to you, is it? You're not in charge right now. Are you, Chief Prentiss?"
Emily shivered at the low, authoritative tone of JJ's voice, dangerous and playful at once. "No, Sir. I'm not."
"And who is?"
"You are." Emily nodded sharply, sucking in a deep breath. "You're in charge of me."
"That's right."
JJ slid her hands under Emily and stood up quickly. Emily squeaked and threw her arms around JJ's shoulders, clutching her tightly. Easily, JJ moved to the conference table, setting Emily down on the edge. She peeled her arms off and shoved her down onto the table. Emily grunted as her back hit the hard wood, but she grinned up at JJ, ready to lay back and take what the blonde agent gave her.
Pulling out slowly, JJ's mouth opened slowly, taking in the way Emily's back arched and her hands tangled in her hair. The older woman moaned quietly, the sound barely more than a rumble in her chest. JJ ran her hands along the inside of Emily's thighs as she carefully pushed back into her. Emily sighed with contentment, smiling at the feeling of JJ inside of her.
"You look so hot like this," JJ told her, fingertips gripping the inside of Emily's thighs and spreading them. "God, you're so wet." She dug her nails into soft flesh, starting a slow, but steady rhythm. "You feel so good."
Emily tried to lift herself onto her elbows, but JJ picked up speed, their hips meeting with each thrust. The base of the dildo hit JJ's clit with each move, teasing her and making her even wetter. She tightened her grip on Emily's thighs, already knowing that her fingers would leave bruises, so she could get better leverage and begin to pound into her wife, pushing both of them toward their orgasms.
"Fuck, Emily," JJ groaned. "You're going to make me come."
"Please," Emily gasped. She gripped the edge of the table to hold herself in place. Her mind struggled to form a coherent thought. "Come inside me. JJ, come inside me."
Releasing Emily's thighs, JJ leaned forward and wrapped a hand around her throat. Her other hand clutched Emily's waist. This angle was even better and she ground into Emily, forcing the base of the dildo against her exactly where she needed it. Emily moaned sinfully, hips wiggling as she tried to help.
"Use me," Emily begged as JJ's hand twitched around her neck, barely under control. "JJ, I need you to fuck me until you come."
Grunting with effort, JJ pounded into Emily, doing her best to keep the hand around her neck loose. A particularly hard thrust made Emily cry out, gasping JJ's name. JJ's hand clenched at the sound, squeezing Emily's neck. It only happened for a second, but JJ stopped moving, yanking her hand away.
"Green," Emily whined, catching JJ's hand and putting it back. "Green. Green. Fuck me, JJ. Please. I'm so close."
Emily was fine, so JJ started thrusting again, slowly at first. With a whimper, Emily put a hand on JJ's stomach, grasping at her shirt. Her hips jerked up to meet each one of JJ's thrusts, and JJ couldn't hold herself back anymore.
She went back to her bruising pace, sending them both closer and closer to the edge. God, JJ loved watching Emily so much. She loved the way her wife's chest heaved when she was about to come, sucking down air and talking nonsense. Emily always tried to keep her eyes open, but she never could. Her eyes slammed shut and JJ knew she was about to come.
"Wait for me," JJ moaned, practically begging herself. "Come with me."
"Jennifer," Emily sobbed, holding her shirt in trembling fingers. "I can't. I'm so close. Please."
JJ released Emily's neck, holding her waist with both hands. "Don't you want to come with me?" JJ asked her, grinding against her, eyes falling closed as liquid heat spread through her body. "God, baby, you're doing so good."
JJ's orgasm slammed into her, knocking her head back and catching her breath in her throat. She could feel Emily come a second later. Hips stuttering, JJ took a deep breath, trying to gain control of her body back. Her heart was racing, body shaking, but she wanted to look at Emily.
Lifting her head, she caught the last of Emily's tremors. Emily's pale skin was flushed a dark red, a sheen of sweat making her glow. Letting go of JJ's shirt, Emily ran her hands over her face, a slow smile tugging at her lips. She dropped her hands onto the table above her head and smirked at JJ.
"You tried to kill me."
"You liked it."
"I did."
JJ smirked and pulled out of Emily. The older woman sat up, tugging her bra down over her breast. JJ was sad to see them go, but it was for the best. Taking a step back, she gestured for Emily to stand, too. Once Emily was on her feet, JJ took her hips in her hands. Emily started to walk forward, but JJ held her in place.
"We've still got some time," she murmured. "Turn around."
Emily's eyebrows shot up, but she obeyed, turning and leaning forward to rest her hands on the table. "What's wrong, Agent? Surprise cavity search?"
JJ reached around her, finding her clit and rubbing tight circles. Emily gasped, falling to her elbows, her head hanging down. Pushing back with her hips, she tried to escape JJ's touch, but she was met with JJ's dick, sliding against her ass. JJ's hips jutted forward, knocking Emily into the edge of the table.
"Can you handle another?" JJ asked, still rubbing Emily's clit. She wanted to push Emily until she was boneless and thoughtless, but she knew that Emily also got overwhelmed very easily. She was a harsh mistress, but she wasn't cruel. "We can stop."
"Don't you dare," Emily managed, voice strangled and tense. She spread her legs. "I'll tell you when I'm done."
Raising an eyebrow at Emily's attempt to be strong, JJ took her dick in her hand and lined it up with Emily's entrance. Before she could even thrust, Emily slid backwards, taking JJ in with one easy move. She groaned loudly, squirming desperately.
"Hey," JJ protested, moving her hands to Emily's hips. "What do you think you're doing?"
Emily didn't answer. Instead, she just started fucking herself on the dildo. It was so hot to see her bent over, too needy to wait for JJ. Determined to get control back, JJ grabbed a handful of Emily's hair and shoved her face into the table.
Grunting, Emily pressed one hand into the table for stability and put the other behind her back. "I'm already so close," Emily said, wiggling against JJ's hips.
Taking Emily's forearm in her free hand, JJ yanked it, dragging a painful cry from Emily. A tug on her hair drew out another one and then JJ was fucking her, each slam of her hips making Emily's ass jump.
Emily loved feeling JJ fuck her when she wanted to prove that she was in control. She knew exactly how to push JJ's bottoms and bring out her competitive streak. After 10 years, they were more equal in bed, but JJ's confident energy was still there, and Emily loved being on the receiving end of it.
Every time JJ's hips hit her, Emily was thrust against the edge of the table. It was painful, like the grip on her arm and her hair, but Emily didn't mind. The pain just mingled with the sharp, pointed pain of her impending third orgasm. Her thighs and stomach hadn't even stopped fluttering from the last one, but it all blended into a dangerous pleasure.
"I thought you were close," JJ said. She released Emily's arm, so she could touch her clit again. "You're not giving up, are you?"
"Make me come," Emily panted. "Isn't that your job?"
JJ rubbed Emily's clit harder, listening as Emily gasped her name. "You're such a brat. Is that what you want to hear? You want me to tell you how fucking good you feel? You need to know that you're a good, good girl? If you were really a good girl, you'd come for me."
Emily came hard, lifting onto her toes as she shivered and shook, muscles contracting painfully. Her orgasm rode that fine line between pleasure and pain. JJ stopped fucking her immediately, knowing that Emily would need a couple minutes before JJ could pull another orgasm out of her.
Once she could think again, Emily spun around quickly, crashing her mouth into JJ's. The kiss was sloppy and messy, both of them hazy from the sex. Clinging to each other, they drank down soft moans and sighs. Emily loved how JJ kissed her like she was as necessary as breathing.
Maybe she was. Emily didn't know what she'd do if she could never kiss JJ again. She would waste away to nothing, turn to dust and die, if she could never kiss JJ again. What would she do if she never tasted JJ again?
The thought made her groan and she fell to her knees. Tugging down JJ's dress pants and boxer briefs, Emily shoved her face between JJ's legs. Her tongue found JJ's clit easily, sucking it into her mouth and releasing it with a wet pop.
"You're such a good girl," JJ sighed, tangling her hands in her wife's grey hair. Emily ate her out enthusiastically. "Fuck, Emily. You look so good on your knees."
Emily whined into JJ. If she could talk, she'd thank her for the compliment. Emily was so grateful for JJ's praise, always turned on by the way JJ said her name. Lapping up the wetness between JJ's legs, Emily worked to gain more praise.
"Just like that," JJ moaned. "Come on, ch- Chief." JJ's stomach muscles jumped as Emily found a particularly sensitive spot. "Take care of your best agent."
She rode Emily's face, falling into a quick rhythm with her tongue. Emily happily took care of her wife. Slipped her tongue as deep as she could reach, licking JJ's entrance before moving back to her clit. JJ came easily, hands fisted in Emily's hair and hips bucking and cutting off her air.
Emily didn't care at all that she couldn't breathe for a moment. She would be content to die between JJ's legs, satisfied to know that she'd done well. JJ gasped, relaxing her iron grip and pushing Emily's head away. Wiping her mouth with the back of her hand, Emily caught her breath.
"Get up," JJ demanded gruffly, reaching down to grab Emily's biceps and forcing her to her feet. "That's enough of a break."
She reached behind Emily and picked her up, cupping her ass and turning around. Emily wrapped her legs around JJ's waist and taking her face in her hands. They kissed as JJ walked to the wall, pressing Emily against it, the dildo trapped between them.
"You've been doing so well," JJ mumbled into her mouth, "but I want more."
Emily nodded impatiently. "Yes. Yes. I can do that for you."
"It wasn't a question."
JJ moved her hips back to make just enough space for Emily to guide her dick to her entrance. Pushing into her, JJ swallowed the weak whimpers that escaped Emily's mouth. They only made her hungrier and she resumed the same punishing pace she'd fucked Emily with before.
"Oh, god," Emily whined, head falling back against the wall, eyes closing. Her lips quivered, thighs trembling around JJ. Every part of her was sensitive and weak after so many orgasms. "I might have been wrong."
"Again," JJ said, shifting to hold Emily up with one arm and shoving the other under her shirt to squeeze a firm, full breast, "it wasn't a question."
Emily sobbed, body limp in JJ's arms. "It's too much. I'm going to die."
"Color," JJ demanded. When Emily hesitated, JJ leaned forward to press her lips against Emily's ear. "Color."
"Green," Emily admitted, fingernails digging into the back of JJ's neck. "I can take it."
"That's my girl." JJ smiled and kissed the soft skin beneath Emily's ear. "You know the rules. Don't make me guess. Come on, Chief. You know communication is key."
JJ's dick felt so good inside her, hitting so deep and rubbing against overstimulated skin. Emily gasped for breath, doing her best not to just fall to the floor. Her heart was pounding so hard in her chest, making it hard to think at all. The only thing she could do was trust JJ and let herself feel good.
Even more than the last round, pain laced her pleasure. Tears filled her eyes as she felt herself near her fourth orgasm. She felt wild and messy and entirely at JJ's mercy. She really had no control right now.
"Talk," JJ ordered, nuzzling the crook of Emily's neck as she fucked her. "I want to hear you come. Tell me how much you like it when I fuck you."
"Jennifer," Emily sobbed, tears streaming down her cheeks, "you're so- Fuck." Licking her lips, Emily fully wrapped her arms around JJ's neck, trying to stay conscious. "God, I love getting fucked by you. I love the way- way you feel inside me. You're so fucking hot. I can't-"
She came with a loud cry, whole body jerking and bucking, clinging desperately to her wife. JJ stopped moving immediately, giving Emily a break and a chance to breathe. She loved feeling Emily writhe against her, trying to get closer and farther all at once.
"I love you so much," JJ whispered into Emily's ear. "You're so amazing and wonderful. You're such a good Unit Chief." Emily whimpered, body starting to calm. "Unit Chief Emily Prentiss," JJ said softly, rolling the title around in her mouth. "It sounds good. You're still mine, though. You could be the president, and you'd still just be my good girl."
"I love you," Emily sighed. She lifted her head from the wall to meet JJ's eyes. "I'm dead, though."
"Hasn't stopped you before," JJ joked, but she pulled out and let Emily's legs down. Keeping her hands on Emily's waist, JJ smirked. "Can you stand?"
Emily rolled her eyes. "Yes."
JJ let her go and Emily's legs gave out from under her. Catching her quickly, JJ laughed as Emily blushed, embarrassed. She couldn't help but be smug at the obvious display of weakness. Apparently, she had done too good a job at fucking her wife and boss.
"Alright," Emily mumbled, "no need to be like that."
"Like what?" JJ asked, batting her eyelashes innocently. "Come on, let's get you dressed."
"How much time do we have left?"
Glancing at the inside of her wrist, she saw that they only had a couple minutes left. "Oh, damn. That's close."
With a groan, Emily pushed away from JJ, walking back to her pants on unsteady legs. "Jesus. We've got to stop doing this. I can't handle being caught again."
"What? You're not used to it by now?"
Emily shot her an unamused look as she bent down to pick up her underwear. "Yeah. Yeah. Laugh it up. I just don't want to traumatize the teammates who haven't seen me naked yet."
JJ pulled the condom off her dildo and tossed it into the trash. "They should be so lucky."
Stepping into her underwear, Emily just rolled her eyes again, smiling. JJ had lost her shame around the same time she'd lost her femininity. Emily didn't care at all, but she'd only just become the Chief and she wanted at least a couple months before she lost Luke, Tara, and Stephen's respect.
Once her underwear was on, She grabbed her pants and stepped into them, too. Looking over her shoulder, she watched as JJ tucked herself away, doing her best to keep her bulge to a minimum. She had almost succeeded when the door to the conference room opened.
Luke started to enter, but froze in place. Emily had her zipper halfway up, and JJ was just pulling her briefs over her harness. The women stared at him as he looked between them, face darkening.
"What's wrong?" Spencer asked from behind Luke. "They aren't in there?"
"Nope," Luke answered, grinning. He winked at JJ, giving her a quick two fingered salute before backing out of the room. "Let's go find them."
"Welp," Emily muttered, zipping herself up and doing the button. "So much for respect."
JJ chuckled, shaking her head. "I mean, he definitely respects me now."
"We've seriously got to stop doing this."
"Oh, come on. You really think you can turn me down?"
"...No."
"That's what I thought, Chief."