A/N: This chapter is pretty sad and yes the title is from the song I thought it went well with this chapter and along with the rest of the story for awhile. Don't be afraid to tell me what you want to see later on. Read away:)

Chapter 4: Poison & Wine

Point of View: Tiara Somerhalder

I sit in the backyard looking straight out at the water. The sun is peeking through but could never give me the warmth that I need. My hair skids across my shoulders as the light breeze comes around once again. Most people would think this is as peaceful as life can get but no. This is where I have spent my early mornings for the past thirty-one days straight.

Today could be the end of me the only reason that I've endured the pain of Ian's touch could be gone today. He'll leave I know he'll leave and take our son away with him. I'll spend the rest of my days alone staring into space waiting for the silver lining to land in my lap but it won't. One day could tear the most important people away because I was stupid.

I should've just listened to him he is my husband but I was hardheaded and naive. I knew that day would happen as long as he was alive but I wouldn't have predicted I would feel this way. I wrap my arms around my torso giving into the cry that rips through my heart and soul. I don't see him but feel him I'm sure he has learned to avoid contact at all costs.

"Baby what's wrong? I know I've asked you for the past month now but maybe I'll get an answer today."

I shake my head not even bothering to look up because if I see those blue eyes boring into me I will end it all right now.

"Tiara I... Maybe you should... You can always talk to me."

I shake my head again then hear the grass crackle beneath Ian as he sits next to me.

"I miss you. I miss hearing you laugh and talk about everything under the sun with Christian. I miss your personality the way you would brighten a room with just your presence. I miss feeling you in my arms when I fall asleep and wake up. We may be in the same bed but gosh you feel light years away. No matter how mad you were at me even on our worst days you were never this cold. The Tiara I knew didn't check out and never plan her return. She never shut me out never looked through me... through her own son. I don't know how else to say I miss my wife that I need my wife. Friends are in need of their companion, siblings in need of their sister, parents in need of their daughter, a man in need of his best friend, and a son in need of his mother. Tiara please I don't know what happened. I'll go the rest of my life without knowing as long as you come back to me."

I hear the emotion thick in his voice the lump of sadness in his throat and the tears that fall down his face without even looking.

"You're trying to talk me off the edge."

"You could call it that."

I stand up and brush any dirt off my pants. "Well it's too late... I've already jumped." Instead of walking into the house I go around to my car in the front.

"Where are you going?"

"I'll be back."

"That's not what I asked!"

"But that's what you wanted to know."

"Then I'm coming with you."

"No."

I get in and lock the doors making Ian beat on the door. "Don't leave! You can't leave like this!"

I speed off with a screech as he yells my name but I keep going. Maybe that would've worked before but now there's only one solution. I don't think I can go through with the promise I made to myself.

I drive to the middle of the Twin Span Bridge that is surprisingly empty proving that this is the right decision. I get out my car then remember that I told Ian I would never leave without a goodbye. I pull out my phone and call him.

"Tiara where are you?"

"I'm sorry I'm so sorry. I promise Christian will be okay without me."

"What are you talking about?"

"You couldn't want me after you find out. I'm not the same I can't handle it anymore. This is for the best you will find someone better."

I look out over the edge the little voice that has sense is getting quieter.

"Don't talk like that I will always want you I will always love you."

My hands shake and my knees are ready to buckle. I step onto the flat railing looking out at the sun.

"I love you." I whisper into the phone dropping it on the sidewalk. I hear Ian's voice building up as he yells through trying to say something that will not change anything.

I turn my head to see headlights coming my way but I fall before I can even question it.

[x]

Point of View: Ian Somerhalder

"I jumped out the car before it even stopped it was as if everything happened in slow motion. I saw her standing on the railing of the bridge and she swayed a little before falling. She fell back on the concrete hitting her head and blood was starting to spread. She was so close to committing suicide I don't know what I did wrong." I can't help the tears creeping down my cheeks as Caitlyn rubs my back in circles crying herself.

"She hasn't been right since Florida and she won't say what's wrong."

"I've tried asking but she won't give an answer. Maybe I pushed too hard and she's in a fucking hospital bed again. In that moment my heart was out on that rail I saw everything flash before my eyes seeing her sway. I honestly think I would've jumped after her if she had stepped off into the water."

"You saved her. Tiara probably would've been falling over the edge if you hadn't gotten there. Your car distracted her and she fell the wrong way. I'd prefer her banged up in a hospital over lifeless in a morgue. Don't beat yourself up you said it yourself you didn't know anything."

I rub my hands over my face just as the Dr. Glen comes back. "This is Dr. Graham I think you two have met before."

We shake hands, "Why are you here?"

"The blood tests show that Tiara is pregnant I ran it several times to make sure. After the recent events that took place a month ago I would assume the possibility of this outcome pushed Tiara to extreme measures. She has had issues with depression before in the past including her last pregnancy which happens quite often. I don't think we have any reason to make any major moves. Her emotions are already scattered but I think with time she will level out."

"Wait what recent events?"

She looks at Dr. Glen who shakes his head, "I'm not to tell you anything Mr. Somerhalder I'm sorry."

"Your wife has a concussion so she will be out for a couple hours. Feel free to sit with her but please keep the visitors to a minimum." Dr. Glen gives a small smile before they both walk away.

I get up and walk down the hall to Tiara's room unsure of how to act or how to feel. I sit down listening to her heartbeat as if it's the best song I've ever heard in my life. I don't understand how the happiest time of our marriage crashed down in only a couple hours on an unhappy day. Now there's another life to worry about something else to push Tiara over the edge. We both wanted another child and I have no clue why that would make her even more depressed.

[x]

"Ian? Ian what happened?"

I jump up hearing Tiara's voice and stand next to the bed, "How are you feeling?"

"Um fine I guess what happened? Where's Christian if you're here?"

"He's with Caitlyn at home. You don't remember what happened?"

She prepares to shake her head but her brown eyes begin to water, "Oh I'm so sorry! I… it was just too much I couldn't handle it anymore. I wasn't thinking right and I didn't think I needed to take depression medicine after Christian I was doing good until…."

Her voice trails off, "Until what baby?"

"Nothing I've had a lot on my mind I got overwhelmed. I fell back?"

"Yes thank god. I got there just in time to get you to the hospital but not soon enough to catch you. Tiara I have to ask do you not love me anymore?"

"Of course I do. I love you more and more each second I love you more than life itself. The way I was thinking was that I had to do it because I loved you that much I couldn't stand to see you in pain after I told you. All the morning sickness and staying in bed so much I know I'm pregnant."

"I thought you wanted to have more kids."

"Yes I do but not like this not in this whirlwind of bullshit. I can barely handle myself I was ready to jump off a damn bridge this morning because I'm that crazy! How in the world am I going to handle carrying a baby?"

"You're not crazy your depression is coming up again and now we know why."

Her face falls as tears roll down her cheeks, "They confirmed it?" She murmurs so low.

"Yes they did some blood work and you're pregnant. Tiara it will be okay I promise you. The baby will be okay and so will you I'll make sure of it."

"That's not the point!" After she takes a deep breath she continues, "You'll leave me. You'll take Christian and leave me I know you will. You won't want to see this baby you won't be able to handle it."

"Why wouldn't I want to see my own child? My own flesh and blood?"

She looks down at her hands and I see the tears fall even faster. "You won't want me anymore if I tell."

"That will never be true." She cries even more and a thought enters my mind, "I don't think you ever would but did you cheat on me?"

"No! Never I couldn't do that. In Florida I-"

"How are you feeling Sleeping Beauty?" Dr. Glen walks in smiling at Tiara and I get the urge to punch him straight in his face but I know that's me being selfish.

"Fine sore and a little tired but better than before."

"We got you started on some low dosage anti-depressants so that is the reason you're feeling more up and aware. The blood loss contributes to your fatigue but mostly the new invader is to blame." He sits on the edge of the bed and takes Tiara's hand agitating me further. "Now there's always other options I don't want you to feel trapped. If you want to carry the baby there's adoption if not abor-"

"No. I decided a long time ago that I'm going to carry this baby and take care of it no matter what. This morning was not me thinking rationally. The baby is innocent its not it's fault how it got conceived." She glances up at me then back down to her lone hand that's in her lap.

"Dr. Graham told me that but we're making sure. We're going to keep you at least until tonight if you need more pain medicine just shout. Those stitches will irritate you quite a bit but no scratching or taking the bandage off." He finally gets up and let's go of her hand, "I'll check on you later."

She nods then looks out the window once we're alone. "Would you please tell me what's going on?"

"Ian I don't want to. Not yet please this day already started crappy and I simply want to be happy a little bit that I get the chance to carry a child. There was a time when we thought that I couldn't anymore so let's be happy in this moment." She looks up at me and smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes.

I kiss her forehead softly then she holds my hand completely surprising me. What is happening to my wife?

I think next chapter will be a month or two after this I really don't want to spend more than four or so chapters dealing with this pregnancy because believe it or not there's an even bigger twist coming... a couple:) Review and all that good stuff please and thank you I would love you even more.