So this chapter grew by about a thousand words when I wasn't looking, but at this point I'm just gonna roll with it.
Anyways. Bit of a change this time, with some familiar faces returning :D We'll start by going back in time about a week from where last chapter ended.
when you hurt under the surface, like troubled water running cold; well, time can heal but this won't - Before You Go (Lewis Capaldi)
o0o0o
After about ten minutes, Uzala has to sit down, completely out of breath and inwardly cursing his lack of physical strength. At least both his cousin and his dog are still enjoying themselves, dashing around in the snow with energy from god knows where.
His phone buzzes against his leg, and he quickly tugs one mitten off with his teeth to unlock it. Lately, he's been unable to bring himself to silence it; irrational and stupid as it is, he's scared he might miss it if she somehow miraculously comes back, might miss it if one of the others needs someone to be there like they weren't able to be for her.
It's not her, of course, just a random email. A blur of white-dusted gold barrels into his legs, and he laughs, startled, as his dog drops a mangy tennis ball at his feet. Obliging, he chucks the thing as far as he can (admittedly not very far, to his mild embarrassment), and watches fondly as his dog takes off like a bullet in pursuit, completely bulldozing over where the projectile landed in a frenzy.
"He finally wore you out?" he asks in amusement as his little cousin collapses on the bench beside him, panting in great puffs of condensation.
In between gasps, Aoi declares, "You...don't get...to talk."
Snickering, he reaches over to pull her hood up and over her face and ruffles her head, and she bats his hand away indignantly. His laughter freezes, catching in his throat like little icicles; they hurt as he swallows hard and settle in his stomach, cold, his hand lingering in the air, as he remembers the times he would do the very same to someone else-
Aoi is watching him strangely, he realizes, and before he can think of an excuse, she says, "Maybe we should call it a day." With a beleaguered sigh, she adds, "I still haven't made a dent in my homework yet, and cram school stops for no one, even on holidays…"
He thinks he's almost out of the woods as they're walking home when she asks casually, "So what's wrong with you on this fine New Year's Eve?"
Uzala throws a half hearted glare at her; she reminds him of Karma in more ways than one. "Just...thinking about a friend, I guess."
She gives him a sidelong look. "Everything alright?"
"Not really," he sighs, giving up on the pretense that it is. "She's been MIA lately. We're worried."
They turn the corner onto their street, and she says, "Wouldn't happen to have anything to do with Sword Art Online, would it?"
"Yeah." He exhales in one long breath. "She was having a hard time adjusting. We—we should've helped her more."
"It's not your fault if she didn't reach out," Aoi says reasonably, face pinched slightly in concern.
"We were her friends-"
"Yeah, not her therapists."
His silence is all the answer she needs, and she jogs him with an elbow as they pause to let the dog sniff around a fire hydrant.
"It'll be fine," she tells him with confidence he wishes he could share. "You and your friends obviously care about her, so I'm sure she's thinking of you guys too, wherever she is."
"I can't help but feel like she might be in danger," he admits, automatically following the dog down the street. "And we don't even know where she is." With a wry half smile, he adds, "You read a lot of mystery novels, don't you? Any ideas?"
Aoi shrugs a little helplessly. "Start at the scene of the crime? Get ahold of her immediate network?"
What network, though? "Easier said than done…"
"Hey, I'm just tossing some ideas down."
He nods absently, trying to make himself think, even though it's all he's been doing since they heard. She never even gave them a name of a friend that they could use…
Then again, in Aincrad, if you wanted to contact someone you didn't know or who wasn't on your friends list, you couldn't just shoot them a message; you had to track them down in person. And Karma ended up doing quite a lot of that, running from informant to informant, all over the steel castle.
Who's to say they can't do the same?
o0o0o
Kyushu isn't nearly as cold as Hokkaido, is the first thing Uzala thinks to himself when he steps out of the train station.
It was a very much last minute decision, to come all the way to Kyushu and scope around Karma's hometown. They're lucky that Kili has a friend down here that they can stay with for a few days, and even luckier that they even knew which town she lived in, something she mentioned only in passing in a random conversation. Uzala is pretty sure that the 'mystery' wasn't intentional on her part; either way, he's relieved that they're not going in completely blind, even if they are trying to search an entire town in three days.
They're very methodical about it. They split up the town, each of them separating to cover as much ground as they possibly can each day. At the end of the day, they head back to Kili's friend's place and compare notes, saving a few and deleting dozens of pictures taken of possibly familiar-looking places.
And to him, the funniest thing is that on the third day, the last day that they were able to squeeze out of their schedules, he almost walks right past it—the vital puzzle piece that would prove invaluable.
"This is it, isn't it?" he says excitedly, feeling better than he has in a while as he gestures unnecessarily.
Kili stares at the cafe wearing a remarkable imitation of the surprised Pikachu meme. "Yeah. Yeah, I think it is."
Neither of them would think for a second to describe their missing friend as 'predictable', but she did have a habit—this cafe, which they saw almost every time they Zoomed. A quick search online shows that it's the only one of its name, a family run business. And they know for a fact that her house or apartment is conveniently reachable by foot from here, greatly narrowing it down to a smaller area.
The two of them stand there, basking in the glory of this big step forward for a few minutes.
"So now what?" Kili asks blankly, and Uzala heaves a long sigh.
"You know," he says, "that is a great question."
"Do we just…" Kili makes a vague hand motion before scratching his head. "Go in there, maybe pull up a few pictures, and ask everyone in sight, 'hey, does anyone know this one random person?'"
It turns out that that is exactly what they end up doing. And they get their hopes up, and then dashed, when one of the people working the counter says that they think they might vaguely recognize Karma, confirming that she was a regular here, but don't actually know anything about her.
"I feel like this would've been way easier in Aincrad," Kili sighs as they leave (with drinks in hand), wandering down the street aimlessly. "I mean...she was a little infamous, but at least people knew who she was."
"Yeah," he mumbles, looking around, trying to dredge up hazy memories of their Zoom calls, but he can't tell if any of these buildings look familiar, or if he's just thinking that they do because he wants them to.
They reach a park about two blocks from the cafe, and Uzala looks around. "I think I vaguely recognize that playground...maybe…"
Kili scrunches up his face, nose red from the cold. "Yeah…Let's check online for apartment blocks around here."
The batteries of their phones drain quickly in the cold, but they've marked a few locations on a map to check out when someone stops in front of where they're sitting.
It's a young woman, probably around Karma's age, with dark-rimmed glasses. Short straight hair frames her face, red from cold, and she looks nervous.
"Can we help you?" Uzala asks politely, exchanging a confused look with Kili, who widens his eyes and shrugs.
She shuffles her feet, hands jammed in her pockets, shoulders hunched in anxious apprehension.
"My friend who works at the cafe down the street told me you're looking for someone," she says without preamble, and Uzala feels like he's been struck by a lightning bolt.
Kili has much the same reaction; he drops his phone in his haste to pull up a picture of Karma, thrusting the snow-encrusted device in the woman's direction. "You mean her? Do you know her?"
Her breath fogs in a sharp exhale as painful recognition flickers in her eyes, and her gaze slides away in what appears to be guilt.
"D-do you know her too?" she asks, obviously struggling to maintain a casual front.
Uzala's curiosity and suspicion have been piqued by her negative reaction, but he can't be bothered to withhold more information if this person can give them answers, friend or not.
"We're her friends from SAO," he explains, ignoring her flinch at the mention of the game. "She—she went radio silent a while ago, and then…"
"We need to know what happened," Kili jumps in, and her hands curl visibly into fists in her pockets. "Did you know her? What happened to her?"
"I—we-" One hand goes to grasp the strap of her purse as the guilt visibly intensifies in her expression. "We were childhood friends. The day she...We—we argued…"
Uzala and Kili exchange slightly puzzled looks. It's not like Karma to react so extremely to an argument of any sort—the worst she would do in the moment is maybe give some sort of scathing last words and then walk away to seethe in private.
"Did she…" His hand tightens upon his knee, and he has to ask. "Did she injure you?"
But her reaction—eyes widening in alarm, hands flying to hastily wave in denial—puts that worry to rest, at least.
"No! God, no. She didn't—we didn't, like, fight fight, if that's what you were asking. Not physically or anything. In fact, I…" Her shoulders hunch, her head dropping in shame. "I think I was the one who ended up hurting her."
That's also strange. There are very few things that words can do to Karma that have not already been done before (probably often by herself in her head). Did her armor crack? Did it give way at a weak point?
A gust of freezing snow makes them all wince, and Uzala suggests quickly, "Why don't we find somewhere warmer to talk?"
Which is how, after walking no more than another few blocks, they find themselves standing in front of Karma's apartment door. The young woman fishes a spare key out of her pocket to unlock the door.
"My name is Ebisu Megu, by the way," she says as she lets them in.
They quickly introduce themselves, using their SAO handles without even thinking about it. She looks a little surprised by the offered names but doesn't say anything.
"That's her room, if you wanted to take a look," she says, subdued, pointing at a closed door. "There's not much in there, though."
A draft of cold air hits them as Uzala pushes open the door, and he shivers. Looking around, there's a bed in the corner, with some shelves above them and a table to the side. Pictures and trinkets litter the shelves, and he has to crack a tiny smile at how cute of a kid Karma was before his eyes land on a conspicuous gap in the middle of the bottom shelf.
Just the right size for a NerveGear. The thought springs unbidden to his mind.
A thin veneer of dust coats her desk, his thumb leaving a trail in it. A cup of pencils sits by a lamp; stacked next to it are some books, mostly textbooks and workbooks and all clearly having gone untouched for some time, so the one that isn't either catches his eye quickly.
"Hey, Kili," he says, summoning the younger man to his side, "have you heard of this?"
Frowning, Kili tilts his head to read aloud, "'Wuthering Heights'...I think I might've heard of it in an English class or something."
Uzala picks it up to read the blurb, and nearly drops the book. "Woah—dude, look-"
Kili's jaw drops. "Heathcliff...The commander...That can't be a coincidence."
They stand there for a few moments, caught off guard by this revelation, before they realize it doesn't really lead anywhere, at least not right now—maybe once they read the book, but they came here for something else.
Karma's friend is sitting in the kitchen, one cup of tea sitting in front of her and two more across the table, and she looks up. "Find anything?"
They show her the book, but she admits that she doesn't know anything about it either, so they drop the matter for the time being.
Kili sits down next to Uzala, his leg bouncing restlessly under the table. "So, we—that is, us and some other SAO friends—we were in the same guild with Karma-"
Her brow furrows. "Karma?"
"That was her name in SAO. We've been trying to track her down and figure out where she is, or what happened, or why she left," Kili explains, "but we haven't had any luck. So we decided to come here, to see if we could find anything. Is there anything that you can tell us about what happened here in the real world?"
She takes a deep breath and swallows hard, her hands fiddling with a keychain on her purse. "Y-yeah, I guess...I don't know much either…"
"Literally anything will help," Uzala tells her, honestly. They're still fumbling around almost completely in the dark as well.
"Well...I think the main thing was that there were two girls, who used to be friends with Natsuki when she still did gymnastics…" She still sounds as if she doesn't fully believe the words coming out of her mouth, but she continues, "They were also SAO players." Her hands twist the keychains with metallic clink clinks. "L-later, she told me...She told me she was one of the game's best players."
"Wasn't wrong," Kili agrees, and she looks at him in disbelief.
"N-no way...you're serious?" At Kili's nod, she takes a deep breath, blinking rapidly. "I-I never thought…"
When she pauses, seemingly in shock, Uzala nudges, "About the two girls…?"
"R-right…" She rubs the bridge of her nose and clears her throat. "I don't know what exactly happened in the game...She said she met them, and they were…"
Her voice shakes, and Uzala has a terrible sinking feeling that he knows what's coming next.
"They were part of a—a guild, I think? A guild, that k-killed people, and she fought them, and she-" Her fist closes around the keychain. "She killed their leader, and locked those two girls up in the game's prison or something…"
Kili's wearing an expression of unbridled horror, shaking hands clasped over his mouth, and Uzala doubts he looks much better.
"And when the game ended, they tracked her down in person," Kili finishes, pale as a ghost. "Oh, god…"
"What did they do to her?" Uzala asks in a hushed whisper; he didn't mean to direct the question at anyone in particular, but he gets an answer anyways.
"They didn't. Do anything, I mean."
Both their gazes snap to hers, which averts downward quickly.
"One of them stalked her. For weeks, apparently. She showed up at Natsuki's job, even at her apartment...I-I even talked to her a few times, and I had no idea...But-" She grimaces in tired confusion. "The next day, after the fight, her hand was sprained, I think, but she said she did that herself. And her parents told me that she wasn't injured at all, except maybe some light bruising…I-I guess her in game fighting translated in real life, sort of…?"
Oh. Oh.
[What if I hurt someone on purpose?]
"...Uzala? Hey, are you okay?"
He nearly jumps out of his seat when Kili's hand lands on his shoulder, and he shakes him off quickly, returning his attention to Ebisu. "What happened to the two girls? The ones that tried to attack her?"
She blinks, bewildered. "What? Them? Um, I'm...not sure, I think they're at a detention center right now or something…?"
"In the fight," he presses; blood drums a frantic beat in his ears. "What happened to them in the fight? Did they get hurt?"
Kili's eyes widen in his periphery in horrified realization, but she still looks lost. "I-I don't know, she didn't say. Why?"
The seconds drip by like molasses, and Kili visibly swallows. "Well...at least...I mean, they're not…"
Uzala meets his gaze evenly. There's more than one way to cause harm in the real world.
Kili looks like he's going to be sick. "She wouldn't...Intentionally? We know she wouldn't...right?"
Uzala's not sure of anything anymore, and he shakes his head slowly. This is too much; he pushes that aside for now. Objectivity. Facts. Report.
"Did anything else happen?" he asks instead. "You said you argued the day before she left. Was that after the fight with the orange players?"
Confusion flickers across her face at the last phrase, but she nods jerkily. "Y-yeah."
He doesn't particularly want to dredge up bad blood and bitter memories, but he also can't bring himself to care about a stranger more than he does about Karma right now.
"What happened?" he asks simply, and she draws in a long, tremulous breath.
"I-I don't even remember all of it," she admits quietly. "I just—her parents told me what happened and asked me to talk to her. They said she was hiding something, they wanted me to find out what it was…"
"She didn't like you prying," Uzala guesses, and after a moment, she nods.
"I knew she was hiding something too...I tried pushing her a little...She talked like she wasn't worried at all about it. I didn't know what to do."
Uzala exchanges a glance with Kili again, not sure what to tell her. "She...probably wasn't that worried, at least not about the things you were. A lot of people tried to kill her in SAO, and, well, obviously, she fought them all off…"
Her hands curl into trembling fists on the tabletop. "She never said anything…"
"Don't take it personally," Kili tells her with a resigned sigh. "She's always played her cards close to her chest. It didn't mean she cared less about us. Most times, she was just trying to protect us."
"She said I wouldn't have believed her," she mumbles at the table, sounding hurt.
Uzala bites the inside of his cheek. There was probably more going on than what's on the surface, if that was one of Karma's reasons. She never withheld information from them for the fear that they would dismiss her concerns as fantasy. Much the opposite, in fact—she feared that they would take her seriously, and attempt to help her. Not that they saw anything wrong with that, but they'd long since stopped trying to win that argument.
They should've tried harder.
"Would you have?" he asks.
She opens her mouth, then closes it with a grimace, effectively answering that question. "I-I...It's just crazy…I grew up with her, I never thought…"
Uzala doesn't bother pressing her on the subject. "Look, I know her. I know how she deals with this sort of thing. She got enough of it from the DDA. She's the sort of person who won't show any sign of becoming upset until you hit a weak point, or until she's just had enough, and then she'll either walk away, or end that conversation right there."
He doesn't say it, and tries not to come off as too accusing, but the unspoken What did you do? is there nonetheless.
Her expression tells him she doesn't appreciate it either. She curls her fingers together, resting her chin on them briefly, before letting her hands drop to the table again in agitation. "I-I said something...that I probably shouldn't have…"
"You didn't know how to deal with the fact that she's a killer," Kili says, solemn and blunt, and tears fill her eyes.
"What if she never comes back?" she whispers. "I don't want my accusations to be the last words I ever say to her."
With a trembling hand, she pulls her glasses away and presses the heels of her palms to her eyes, shoulders quivering. Kili hands her a tissue box and shuffles his chair closer to pat her back awkwardly, and Uzala blinks away the burning sensation in his own eyes as he gets out his phone.
[Hey guys, it's our last day in Kyushu, and we'll be in Tokyo tonight. Turns out coming here in person was the right choice. Thumbs up if you guys can meet us.]
Setting his phone back down, he looks up, meeting Kili's eyes—in them, he can see the haunted, time-dulled grief that's been dogging all their steps recently, but also a newfound determination with the truth now in hand.
He clears his throat, and Karma's friend looks up, blinking rapidly.
"We're going to find her," he vows, and Kili nods firmly.
Her eyes widen before she bows her head again and simply reaches for another tissue to dash across her face, sniffling. And he wants to believe himself, but they're just words. He knows Karma, knows her titanium resolve.
If she doesn't want to be found, they will never find her.
All they can do is go to her, and have faith in her, and have faith that she'll be willing to meet them halfway. The alternative of Karma never coming back is not an option, because Karma is stronger than that—they have to believe that she is.
A small voice, still thick with tears, pulls him from his thoughts.
"If—if it's not too much trouble, could you-" She takes a deep breath. "Could you tell me a little more about her?"
o0o0o
Kirito runs his fingers under the dark, translucent red of the AmuSphere, the little lights blinking on the side of the smooth material in his periphery. Supposedly, this thing is safer than the NerveGear, with automatic logout features if the player's physical body enters a state of emergency and no risk of it frying their brain in case someone yanks it off.
He almost kind of misses his NerveGear. It was clunky and not as comfortable, but some nostalgic, sentimental part of him misses it anyways. Through some negotiating for information on SAO, he was able to get it back initially, but after what Karma did, it was taken away again—not that he blamed them.
The timing couldn't be more perfect. Yesterday, the man who'd told him where Asuna's hospital was contacted him again with news—Karma was not in Sword Art Online.
Kirito could've told them that anyways; the SAO servers had been completely deleted. He'd tried.
Instead, they determined that she was in another VR game. There are plenty of them out there now, even after the whole SAO crisis, but it was one game in particular that saved the VR industry from total ruin.
When he first heard the news a month ago, he'd been shaken to the core. Worried, even, and afraid that Karma had been pulled into another one of Kayaba's plans. He wasn't stupid; like just about everyone else, he knew how devoted she'd been to the Commander of the Knights of the Blood Oath, and he knew she was only human.
No one had suspected a thing. Not the people working with her in therapy, not her coworkers or employers at her job, not her family nor friends.
People all over Japan know who she is; despite the government's efforts, it was impossible to keep that a secret with how many people were there to see the end of Aincrad (even with how many that had died in that room). They called her crazy, speculated that she was even working with Kayaba on his next grand scheme, wondered if she'd gone back to Sword Art Online.
Baseless rumors, all of it, Kirito had thought at the time. No matter what she's done, he knows her to be remarkably sane—it's the only way she could've survived this long—if not completely so. And she would never work with Kayaba, right? Not after he betrayed her like he did. The very notion was ridiculous.
It had to have been against her will. She said it herself; she would've taken it back, all of it, if she could, so why would she return to that place of her own choice?
Now, he's not so sure, after realizing how much he didn't know at the time.
Kikuoka said that they'd tried forcing her to log out by announcing a last-minute system checkup in this game called Alfheim Online. Every single player had logged out, however unwillingly—every player except one. And when the administrators went in themselves to comb the game top to bottom, they found nothing, and yet Karma still hadn't woken up.
But this morning, Kirito had received a certain email from Agil, and the pieces started to fall together. Karma must've found something out about Asuna being in Alfheim and that was why she left; it just makes sense. Kirito's not sure why she didn't say anything to anyone, or why she felt the need to go so far, but he's sure he can get the answers from her when he meets her.
He slides the AmuSphere over his head. Kikuoka had given it and Alfheim to him for free in exchange for his help in finding the other 'hero of SAO'. Two birds with one stone.
Well, three, actually. He has to admit, he missed the virtual world.
"Link start."
o0o0o
In a blinding rain of shards, the hulking wall of virtual muscle and flesh explodes, leaving a lone fairy fluttering about to collect her prize. Humming in satisfaction at the victory, Karma touches down lightly on the floor of the Valley of Giants, her boots leaving prints in the thin blanket of snow.
Heathcliff is still watching from afar, and she lifts her hand in a wave before returning her attention to the drops. They've been drifting apart recently; she can feel the threads between them starting to unravel at the seams even as they sit shoulder to shoulder over coffee, even as they still cling to each other, even as she can no longer look him in the eye.
I haven't chosen yet, she wants to say in all those strained moments, we've still got time, haven't we?
But she knows she can say so all she wants, and she won't be any closer to being able to say that she will choose to stay. Each moment she is unable to choose is another moment that she hasn't chosen him, and it makes her feel terrible even though it's not really her fault, is it? Sure, she's being horribly indecisive-
But if he hadn't left her in the first place, they wouldn't even be here, so really, whose fault is it?
So she keeps her gazed fixed in the sky, on the tree, so she won't have to look at him and he won't have to see her resentment. For over two weeks now, she's thrown herself at the monsters of this world, bleeding them dry over and over; as long as Asuna is imprisoned, she has something to do to avoid thinking about what happens next.
Avoidance and denial—it seems that all she's good for anymore is running away from her problems. What happened to the times she went looking for them?
Then again, those times were no good either. She went looking for those orange and red players and hated herself a little more every time she killed another. Does she not deserve a break from forcing herself to run headlong into trouble?
But running away makes her hate herself too.
She should've known living here in Alfheim could never have been so simple, because deciding to leave the real world was the easiest decision she'd ever made, impulsive and mindless in her weakness. She should've known that taking the easy way out would return to stab her in the back later.
Maybe I just can't win with this.
In her periphery, she can see a small red-clad figure waiting, and swallows down her resentment once more.
If she can't win with this, she'll at least make sure Asuna can. And then…
And then.
A little envelope icon pops up in her HUD, startling her out of her thoughts. It's a new message from Eugene, to her surprise—she'd forgotten he was on her friends list.
[I have a proposition for you.]
Curiosity piqued, she responds, [Am listening.] He's asked her for the occasional favor in the past, like gathering mats for rare armor for the army, and always paid well for it.
[I heard from a friend of a friend that you were in Sylvain at one point. You even met Lady Sakuya and talked to her without her trying to kill you.]
[My charisma is over nine thousand, obviously. What's your point?]
[Are you friends?]
Karma snorts quietly at that. [Just because she didn't try and kill me doesn't mean we're buddy buddy.]
[I meant are you on her friends list?]
She considers whether or not to answer truthfully. Why did he ask? Is he trying to discern whether she can contact Sakuya, or whether she can't?
[No. Why?]
This time, his response is much slower—he seemed to be thinking it over, like her.
[You want to get to the top of the World Tree.]
A statement, not a question. She shrugs; no point in denying it. Everyone wants it. [We're dancing circles around each other here. Get to the point, would you?]
[You're aware of the informal alliance between the Sylphs and Cait Sith?]
[Yeah, and?]
[I'm leading the Salamander army to the Valley of Butterflies right now. An inside source in the Sylphs told us that the Sylph leader and the Cait Sith leader are meeting there this evening, with nothing more than a light diplomatic escort, to discuss a potential treaty for clearing the World Tree. I'm sure you know this already, but if a faction leader is killed, the faction that killed them will receive 30% of its treasury and have the right to levy any tax on the territory and occupy its towns for ten days.
[I've been hearing your name going around recently. Seems like you're doing well for yourself. I'm sure you'd be a big help in the World Tree. No one has ever made it past the NPC soldiers. For all we know, they might be only one of several obstacles, and I'd like more combatants with high individual skills. If you were to join us, I'd never hold you to the army. And I'd like to have you there for the attack today as well—if they somehow make a break for it, we'll need the kind of speed that rumors say you have. Are you in?]
She swallows hard, her throat dry. She rereads the message, and then rereads it again, for good measure. Of course she knew about the faction leader death penalty, but double that, from two of the largest factions in the game? The ramifications are staggering. With that kind of power and money, the Salamanders might seriously have a chance at clearing the World Tree. By herself, Karma has come close several times already. With an entire army, equipped with some of the best gear money can buy in this game…
"This isn't a good idea," Heathcliff warns, and she jumps; since when did she let him sneak up on her? "If the Salamanders get what they want, the whole world will be thrown out of balance. Whatever connections you've made will likely fall apart." And like usual, he's not wrong.
She has grown used to the wary looks from Sylphs and simply acts like she doesn't notice those little idiosyncracies; she got plenty of practice already in Aincrad. Business is business, and when other fairies realize that she's reliable with a good reputation, they quickly look past that racial barrier, or at least act like it.
If the Salamanders succeed with this power move of theirs, nothing will be the same ever again.
"You're right," she says aloud, composing a response. "This isn't a very good idea. For the leader of an army, you'd think he'd know better."
[Turn back. Leave your army in Gattan. It's, what, over fifty people? The Valley is way too open. Cait Sith have the best sight in all the races, and Sylphs are the fastest—they'd have to be blind, stupid, or both to not see you coming from literally a mile away and then run the second they do. You'd never make it in time if you circled around from the cliffs either, and it'd take you way too long to get all your troops through the thick woods on foot, not to mention they probably have scouts out anyways. Just bring one party of your best fighters, max.]
[You have a point, but seven against fourteen? I don't like those odds. We only get one shot at this.]
Almost involuntarily, her gaze flickers upwards at her companion before she sets her jaw.
[I'll keep them there, soften them up a bit. Sakuya knows me, and I'm just one person. They'll want to hear me out.]
She hears a short sigh. "Are you sure about this?"
Another message alert: [You really think you can do it by yourself?]
"You said you wouldn't get in my way," she says softly, opening up a reply. "So don't."
[Think of it this way. The rumors you hear about me? They got started by people who saw me only playing for fun.]
"I will not," he responds evenly. "I only wish to make sure that you aren't making a mistake, and-"
"You just don't want me to find Asuna," she snaps; the menu window spins with her as she whirls around to face him head on, lip curled back. Her voice cracks like a whip; she thinks it might cut at her heart more than his. "That way, I'll stay here forever, is that what you want? Well, you don't get to be scared that I might leave." A hairline crack fractures her words as she trembles. "You left me first, remember?"
His expression flickers, the only sign that her words had even the slightest effect.
"I thought that you wanted to stay as well," is all he says, his voice hard and cold like steel.
I do, she wants to cry. This is my home too.
Taking one step towards him, she juts out her chin defiantly instead. It's not as if he ever gave her a single sign of mourning, a single look back, when he tried to abandon her, so why should she do so now?
"I don't just care about me," she declares spitefully, finding a vindictive pleasure in seeing his face contort briefly. "I'll burn down this whole world and the Tree if that's what it takes to get her out of here...The Salamanders will be useful to that end."
Heathcliff holds her gaze evenly as something dark flickers in his eyes. "How selfish of you."
"Aren't we all?" Turning around and summoning her wings, she rolls her shoulders and says, "It doesn't matter anyways. This is just a game for everyone else in here, isn't it?"
She's just about to take off when he whispers, "I didn't expect that you of all people would be so eager to betray the trust that someone put in you."
Her muscles lock for a split second, leaving her stumbling, stricken with an equal mixture of shock and rage, chased with bitter shame. Breathing heavily, she squeezes her eyes shut, refusing to look at him—if she were to find judgement in his eyes, she's not sure what she would say or do, but she knows she would regret it.
"Don't pretend like you were thinking of anyone but yourself," she whispers back, before kicking hard off the ground.
From the ground, Heathcliff watches her receding figure and shakes his head.
If only she knew, he thinks as he follows her trail, how from the moment they met, all he could think about was her.
How far we've fallen since that day.
But they always had each other to lift them up again.
Somewhere along the way, they instead began to drag each other down, down, down.
o0o0o
I'm not giving up, but I'm giving in, to my darker side, to my every sin, so I can fight again - Any Other Way (We the Kings)
a glass that's half empty won't wash away the mistakes; it only makes a mess - Still Worth Fighting For (My Darkest Days)
Wow, Heathcliff, you really went there with the whole betrayal comment, huh?
(Also, excuse me while I pick apart the Salamanders' canon plan from Karma's POV :P)
These last two chapters actually changed quite a bit from the original. The real life KoB and Megu scene was totally new. It was more filler than anything (I mean, it'll be relevant later but not like super important), but I kinda wanted to give Megu some kind of small redemption (not quite accurate, but it's the best word I could think of), seeing how poorly things ended with her the last time we saw her. Also, I was thinking of having Uzala go to Karma's hometown by himself, but this way we get some more interesting reactions and interactions between him and Kili as they discover the horrible truth. And it's kinda funny; before I started posting this story, the KoB as a whole weren't part of the fic, just Uzala for a few scenes in the first half, and then I wrote chapter 3 and I realized I wanted to delve a little into the tangible consequences of Karma's decision in the real world as well. tl;dr, they grew on me XD
And like I said, I decided to make some changes to the Salamander attack last minute. Honestly, looking back at it, that entire episode baffles me. I have so many questions? I'm not even going to get to everything in this chapter's notes. For starters, the Valley of Butterflies is this huge open place. Sakuya and Alicia should've seen a big-ass, sixty-five-person army of people in bright red armor flying in from literally a mile away. I rewatched the episode, and half the people at that table were facing the direction that the Salamanders came from; there was no way they should've missed that. Why didn't they just run? So yeah, I didn't want to change canon too much, so the diplomatic meeting will still take place like it did in canon, even though it doesn't make much sense :/ I'm instead changing the Salamanders' plan to make Karma's involvement necessary.
On another note: yeah, Kirito, that's definitely why she's been living in Alfheim for the last month. So he doesn't have his NerveGear, which means he'll have to start from scratch. He'll still get dumped in the Ancient Forest, for story reasons :P And he won't be OHKO-ing anyone, but between his muscle memory and Leafa's actual stats and a little bit of plot armor, they'll be fine. I thought about including the Legrue Corridor fight (Leafa would've just yeeted them over the earth wall using a wind spell, which...I feel like they should've been able to do in canon too, but anyways), but it didn't fit anywhere.
Also, literally right after I wrote that author's note at the end of last chapter, I thought of an AU in which Heathcliff does release Asuna at Karma's request...but Karma stays. She chooses him. And obviously, Asuna, Kirito, and the other KoB immediately start looking for Karma in Alfheim with Leafa's help; meanwhile, her relationship with Heathcliff deteriorates faster and faster the more they try to keep it together with Karma locked into her decision by her own will and her reluctance to let him go, afraid that she'll have nothing left if she does. I actually wrote a little bit of it, with Asuna and Kirito and the other KoB talking about it in real life, but the more I thought about it, I decided I still like this plot better XD
Next chapter, Karma makes some, uh, questionable decisions. Not like that's anything new, though :3