Alright, let me have it. I'm late as hell. Seriously, when did I say I'd update?

Review Responses:

Huffelpufdraws: IT'S TOMARAH! Jack needs to get some of that "respect women" juice Tommy Boy has. I swear that is already an actual ship. Just seems likely. ELMER IS THE TRUE KING OF NEW YORK, BOW DOWN! Well, you're welcome! Gotta love being broken... Brooklyn needs many chill pills. Go Smalls! Yep...it's that time. Brace yourself.

Emz05: Sarah is totally not based on me and my love of Tommy Boy and appreciation for eyebrows. Definitely an original character trait not inspired by real life. Absolutely. Y'know, at one point I did have plans for the twins to be unsingle, but there wasn't time to care about the twins, so that got scrapped. OMG YES PUT BROOKLYN'S HERE ON LOOP

Dylan Quagmir: Love a no happiness warning. I need one in my personal life. Yes, I did decide on he/they for Buttons, a while back. Always good to check in though. YES LUKAS' DRAWING GOT AN UNINTENTIONAL REFERENCE! Elmer is iconic. Twins are iconic. Medda is especially iconic. And not oblivious, just worried and trying not to be. Please, sleep at 2 am. Don't cry. I beg.

Are ya ready kids? No. You're not.

Chapter 66- Jack

Tuesday, September 21, 1999, 5:10 p.m.

If Jack had only hypothesized that his friends no longer needed him, the rally was his solid evidence. A part of him had said to just go home after what had happened in that storage room, knowing he wasn't emotionally equipped to handle this right now. But he'd shoved that away. He had promised Davey, and he'd let Dave down too many times recently to do it twice in a row. Once was going to be more than enough.

Concealed backstage, Jack observed it all. Davey had been halfway through his speech when Smalls entered, leading The Bronx just like old times. Seeing her there- front and center, and so strong... made Jack brace himself doubly for the task ahead. And then he noticed Race descending the risers, cozying up next to Spot, leading the cheers with all his heart. Jack couldn't do this. He couldn't.

But he had to.

"Tonight, you're makin' history," Davey told the crowd, looking a little put off by the entrance of the Bronx girls, but going forward nonetheless. Jack remained frozen in the wings, not ready to move. "Tonight, we declare that we are just as much a part of the school district as any teacher or administrator. We are done bein' treated like kids."

Davey, no. It's my job to say that kind of thing, not yours. Jack started inching forward, and to his horror, someone spotted him. He locked his eyes with the ground as Smalls broke away from Spot and Race, not wanting to see the glow he was soon going to snuff from her face.

"You did make it!" she exclaimed, not making to hug him like she had the day before.

Reluctantly, he made eye contact, deciding now was fine to get it over and done. "Smalls, you should know-"

"From now on, we will be treated as equals!" declared Davey. He was rewarded by enthusiasm from the crowd; looking over Smalls' head, Jack could see him basking in that praise.

Ruining it was going to be an asshole move. He didn't want to anymore. Screw the deal he'd made, and forget the money. This wasn't going to-

"An' here's Jack!" Smalls called out, pushing him from his hidey-hole.

Shit.

"Jackie!" Davey greeted, striding over, relief on his face.

In the risers, a chant of "Jack! Jack! Jack! Jack! Jack!" rippled to life, started by his fellow Manhattan newsies.

Everyone had their attention on him. A delighted Smalls hovered at the edge of the wings, while Medda stood on the other side, surprise in her eyes. Race was shrieking his name. Spot was almost smiling. Davey's arm was around his shoulders. This was his worst nightmare.

"Alright, alright! Shut up!" Jack shrugged Davey away, raising his hands to quiet the voices pounding in his ears. "Youse wanna be treated like adults? Yer gonna hafta start actin' like 'em. I'm not sure some a' you really know what that means."

The excitable newsies let their noise fade to a dull murmur. Not one of them, he could hope, was comprehending where he was going with this.

"Ya see, adults hafta make choices. An' they's gotta explain why they made those choices, 'specially when they're hard. When you's grown up, you can't just run yer mouth. You gotta make some damn sense." Jack glanced at Davey, whose eyebrows were raised. Even the smart one wasn't getting it.

"Now, Pulitzer-" Booing filled the theater, causing Jack to yell for order again. "Maybe his decision don't seem right ta you, but didja eva' think maybe he had 'is reasons? Maybe he ain't completely a villain, y'know?"

Crickets. Spot came forward, all traces of potential smile gone. "You's jokin', right Jackie-boy?"

Though it pained him inside, Jack pulled his face into a smile. "'Course!" He cleared his throat, making his speech take a different road. "Pulitzer. Raised da price a' papes an' cut our classes without so much as a word to us, and that was a lousy thing ta do."

"Yeah," said Spot with a firm nod.

"So's we got mad. An' we showed 'em we ain't gonna be pushed around by da likes a' him no more. Hence the strike." He gestured to the newsies at large. "An' now, what 'appens? Well, ideally, Pulitzer lowers da prices, gives us back our programs, says we go back ta school."

"Yeah!" This came from everyone, all clapping again.

"An' then!" Jack interrupted their pleasure. "A few weeks afta' that, he raises da prices again, makes da same cuts, an' don' think he won't."

Davey started, "Jackie-"

"So whadda we do then?" The golf ball popped back into his throat. "An' whadda we do when he decides ta do it, again, afta' that, when our favorite teachers are forced ta quit deir jobs an' we can't do nothin' ta stop it?" Out of the corner of his eye, Jack found Medda's gaze, but he quickly ignored the look of apology on her face. Keep it together, Kelly. "Fellas, we gotta be realistic here. If we don't go ta school, we don't graduate. If we don't graduate, we don't get jobs. We don't get paid if we don' work. We 'ave no college, no futures, nothin'." Now that he was on a roll, he couldn't slow it. "How many days d'ya think ya can go without makin' money? How much school can ya cut out on without yer parents or foster parents punishin' ya? Huh? Believe me, howeva' long it is, Pulitzer can go longer. He's got more power, an' he always will."

There were shouts of protest, boos of outrage, and a handful of angry throwing things from Jack's audience.

"But I have spoken with Mr. Pulitzer!" He announced above the din. "An' he..." Smalls had come to stand right next to Jack, so her eyes were what he locked on as he dropped the bombshell. "He has given me 'is word. If we disband the union-"

"Disband the union?" Davey was part of the shouting now. "Are you insane?"

"He will not make any more cuts for anotha' two years! He'll even put that in writin'. I say, we take the deal, go back ta normal knowin' we 'ave a little bit a' security. Whaddaya say?"

His speech was met with resounding unhappiness as not a single person agreed.

"Look fellas, I know it sounds shit, but take it from me, it's actually a really good-" Jack froze. Mush and Blink marched out of the wings, dragging Katherine by the arms. Katherine, who was carrying a wad of cash. Jack's money from Pulitzer.

"Ya came ta see da famous Jack Kelly." Mush declared, shoving Katherine towards him. "This is what he really is. A sell-out."

Spot strode across the stage next, from the opposite side, and pushed Jack roughly into Katherine. "You 'ave fun wit yer girlfriend, Jackie-boy."

Katherine, understandably ticked off by being pushed around so much, handed Jack his money before facing the crowd. "For the record, for those of you who don't know me: my real name is Katherine Pulitzer. I may be Joseph Pulitzer's daughter, but I've been with you from the start. I'm even the person who got the strike in the paper. I understand if you don't think you can trust me, but if you'd ever like my assistance again, you can find me at the offices of The New York Sun. Ask for Miss Plumber. They'll know what you mean." She bowed gracefully to the crowd and took off, practically running for her life.

Now Jack's life was on the line. He stood still, watching the point she'd disappeared at, until someone tapped him on the shoulder. Instincts still kicked into overdrive, he whirled around, letting his violent reflexes act first. Expecting one of the other newsies, he didn't think much of checking who it was.

Not until after he'd backhanded Les.

The little boy stared up at him, hand to his cheek, not quite processing what had just happened. Meanwhile, Jack stumbled backward, trying his hardest to form words enough to apologize.

"That's it, Kelly!" came a shout from somewhere on the risers, and suddenly Tommy Boy had slammed into him, pinning Jack to the ground. "You goddamn traitor!" he went for a punch, but Jack rolled out of his grip, scrambled to his feet, and dashed from the theater.

The school hallways were dead quiet except for his own sneakers pounding the linoleum, so it was easy to hear the entrance of another person. It was even easier to pin down who it was from just the voice. "Jack! Jack, wait!"

Begrudgingly, Jack ground to a halt and spun to face Racer, who was holding the cash he'd dropped back in the theater.

"You forgot..." Race held out the money. "Here. Take it."

He'd gone out of his way to help Jack, after everything. "Why didn'tcha just keep it?"

"It's yours. An' I know what yer gonna use it for."

"You don't care?"

Race shrugged. "I hear there's some great restaurants out west."

"Some a' the best." Taking the money and shoving it in his pocket, Jack asked, "Aren'tcha gonna try ta stop me?"

"An' do exactly what everyone else is doin'? No way. I'm original."

Jack forced a laugh. "Ya sure are."

"So I'm lettin' you go." He expected Race to leave after that, but it didn't happen. His friend just stared at him, like there was more he wanted to say.

"Somethin' else ya want, Racer?"

"Explanations, for starters."

"C'mon. Ya saw me back there. Y'know what's goin' on."

"Guess I was hopin' it was a joke." Race pulled out a cigarette, started flipping it over in his fingers. "Ya really sold us out ta Pulitzer, huh."

"Yeah, an' Kath's the daughter a' that scum too. Everyone's an asshole, who cares?"

Race made a whinnying noise with his lips. "She told us that already. A few days ago."

Of course. Jack had felt something was off. The other newsies hadn't been outraged enough. "An' none a' youse bothered ta tell me, I see."

"She wanted ta tell you herself."

"There's a lotta things she wants ta do ta me an' doesn't."

"Right…" Race stuck the cigarette between his teeth, then left it there, talking around it. "Well, I guess... I'll see ya around."

Nope. "I'll be in New Mexico, actually."

"Sure ya will." He smiled, as if to say 'I know you better than that'.

Jack crossed his arms. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Because ya neva' mean it when you say that, asshole. Santa Fe was never real."

"Sorry?"

Removing the cigarette from his mouth, Race smiled again. "You expect us to believe you're actually gonna leave us?"

"I didn't invent this ta be dramatic, if that's what you's tryin' ta say."

"Come on, it was just a story ya made up ta help me an' Smalls through da Refuge, wasn't it? Somethin' passed down from yer dad? Ya know you ain't really gonna get there an' find a whole city wit a banner welcomin' you home."

And Jack had thought hitting Les had fried his system. "Why would you-" He sputtered, "No! It was real, it was always real!"

"No, it wasn't!" snapped Race, not playing around anymore. "That college out there an' the scholarships you thought you'd get, even I knew that was all goin' nowhere! You've got a pipe dream! I dunno why you didn't realize it sooner."

"I spent all a' summer puttin' in da work ta get into that school, how the hell couldja think-"

"Well maybe I thought you were gonna change yer mind! Ya seem ta do a lot a' that!"

He might have been a little correct, but Jack wasn't one to admit that. "You neva' believed in me at all, is that what yer sayin'?" He lunged forward, shoving his friend's shoulders.

Race didn't push back, but there was a tremor in his voice as he lowered it. "I believed in the you I know, Jack. Not the imaginary cowboy you think you are. I believed in my brother, an' I believed that he was gonna come to his senses an' realize that all he needs is right here. Smalls and me. An' Crutchie, an' Katherine, an' Medda, an' Dave-"

"So I'm so tied down by my baggage I could neva' leave this stinkin' city, is that it?"

"Yes! But not in a bad way..."

"Oh sure, not in a bad way," scoffed Jack. "Look, you saw what I jus' did ta Davey."

"He still has faith in you, just like I do."

"Davey has an older sister who won't stand for me hurtin' 'im any longer. He's done with me."

"So? Even without him you've still got a bunch a'-"

Jack counted on his fingers. "Kath needs me to stay away if she wants 'er career ta pan out. Medda doesn't trust me, an' Crutchie, if you ain't figured it out, is in the Refuge." He let his hand clench when he'd finished.

"People can get outta the Refuge," reasoned Race. "We did. An' besides, Smalls and I are still here for ya, you know we'll listen."

"Right, because I wanna pile all my shit on da two most fucked-up kids in da group."

Race threw up his hands. "Neva' stopped ya before!"

"Well gee, I dunno, maybe I'm tired of hurtin' youse!"

"An' leavin' us fer New Mexico is gonna hurt less?"

Taking a few backwards steps toward the door, Jack growled. "What's it gonna take fer you ta realize ya don't need me?"

Race's eyebrows shot up, but in disbelief rather than amusement. "Oh my god, are you hearin' yourself? Stop actin' like no one cares about you. It's gettin' old."

"Ya think I'm makin' this up?" Jack spread his arms wide, gesturing wildly at the hall around him. "Just look at you! Mista' high-and-mighty Spot's protectin' ya now. Soon enough you's gonna get the entirety of freakin' Brooklyn ta run to if you's hurt."

"What 'bout the rest a' Manhattan, though? They's nothin' without their captain."

You all say that, and every time it turns out untrue. "Well, too bad! I wasn't always gonna be around ta help youse out, maybe it's time you start learnin' that an' grow the fuck up!"

The hall fell silent. Race's fidgeting fingers stopped moving completely. "Grow up." He repeated, shoving his cigarette behind his ear. "Grow up? How much more do I need ta do that? And don't say bein' abandoned by my parents, livin' through da Refuge, and tryin' ta lead an entire school ain't adult enough!"

Shut up shut up shut up shut up. "POOR BABY!" Jack bellowed, causing Race to suck in a breath. He knew he'd crossed a line, but he couldn't take it back, and had no choice other than to throw himself over it completely. "Poor little kid lost 'is parents an' had ta deal with Snyder, must've been so hard, I can't imagine!"

He waited for the retaliation, but Race didn't yell, simply warned, "Don't." in a tone more level-headed than Jack had ever heard him use.

Rather than being proud of the collectedness, Jack laughed mirthlessly. "What?"

"Don't you dare act like I ain't been through enough just 'cause I wasn't there quite as long as you an' I don' remember shit. We both had the same experience."

"No." The expression on Jack's face probably looked insane, but he didn't care. "No. You don't get what it's like ta go through every single day knowin' one mistake can toss you back there. You're out, an' you're safe, and ya know why? 'Cause a me. I did that. I bargained ova' and ova' just ta get you outta there, so's maybe ya could 'ave a betta' life than I eva' will!" There were tears in his eyes now, but he no longer gave a damn if Racer saw him cry. "I been lookin' afta' you fer half a' my stupid life, an' jus' once when I make a move ta look out fer myself, I get called a traitor!"

"That's because you betrayed us!"

"I only took the money so's Pulitzer wouldn't have youse arrested! He was gonna send Snyder afta' all a' youse if I didn't tell ya ta stop the strike, I had no choice!"

"What's the point in you doin' all that work ta protect us, only ta just leave?"

Swallowing the pain in his throat, Jack said, more softly, "If ya listen ta me an' quit, I can leave knowin' you'll be safe."

Another quiet moment followed. Just for a second, it seemed Race might listen. But then he challenged, "An' what if we don't quit?"

If he wanted to argue, then fine. Jack would argue. Didn't matter anyway; Race was never going to understand. "Have fun in the Refuge, I guess. Congratulations, you've grown up. If you wanna keep strikin', go ahead. I ain't stickin' around ta watch youse die." Jack turned on his heel, walking briskly down the hall until Race blocked his path.

"So yer runnin' away," he deduced.

Jack slowed. "I ain't."

"Then why don'tcha stop escapin' all the crap that's happenin' here and stay ta deal with yer pain?"

"What're you talkin' about?"

"That shit yer always preachin', the 'don't keep stuff bottled up' mantra, you don' even follow it yerself! You're so fucking numb nothin' matters ta you anymore."

"Ya wanna talk about numb? How 'bout you? You been blockin' shit out for so long you don't even know who you are."

Race's cheeks were burning like overheated light bulbs. "Stop it."

"Racer's got 'is quirks," Jack taunted, "Racer don't rememba' nothin', Racer's a poor little idiot, don't we all pity 'im. Yer brain's runnin' around all the time, but y'know what it's doin'? Hidin' you."

"From what?"

"Oh, I dunno…" he pretended to think about it, though the answer came to him easily. "The fact that yer a complete failure who's gonna die alone!"

"So're you if ya go out ta New Mexico!"

"I got plans out there, you watch!"

"No, you don't! You ain't goin' ta some fancy college, ya ain't gonna get a farm an' live off da land, there's nothin' for you out there!"

"You don't know that!"

"Yeah, I do! Ev'ry single person who cares about you is here, an' that scares you, so yer runnin' away, just like always!"

"I ain't scared a' nothin'!"

"How 'bout Crutchie?"

Jack stopped, devoid of any response.

"What if he's runnin' outta time there in da Refuge an' you miss yer chance ta help him?"

Racer might have been right. Maybe. But that truth hurt too much for Jack to face. "He's fine. He'll get out soon enough."

"You're too busy fleein' da coop ta know that."

"Shut. Up."

"You's always scared a' the people ya love changin' their minds and leavin' ya alone, but look who's doin' just that ta his best friend!"

And they were back to screaming. "If yer so worried 'bout Crutchie, why don't ya get 'im outta the Refuge yerself?"

"Maybe I will!"

"So do it!"

"Then stay!"

"Fine! Gimme a call when you've freed Crutchie!"

"Fine!" Race spat in his hand. "Ya got a deal."

Jack shook his head, pushing past Race to exit the school. "That's disgusting." He threw open the door and bolted through the courtyard, pretending not to hear his brother yelling for him to come back.

Does that feel like a weird ending point? I think I'm just too used to it.

So yeah... Jack's unraveling. Not much to explain.

Leave a review, a reaction, anything you want, and I'll see you next time!