Legalities, as always Sam and Dean and all things Supernatural do not belong to me. They are the property of the CW and Kripke Enterprises. I wish they would share, but I don't think that is going to happen so I guess I will simply play in their sandbox for a bit.

Rating MA: For language and injured Dean and Sam throughout the storyline, they will also be M/M pairing although they are not brothers in this story. Pairings won't happen till later chapters, so be sure to review the warnings before reading.

If you don't like this type of thing, then don't read this story I am sure there are ones that would be more pleasing to you.

Author's Note: This story will follow Sam and Dean they continue their lives and try to deal with the challenges of their own pasts and tragic past of a child named Adam Milligan. This ride will get bumpy before it gets smooth, so be prepared.

This chapter contains mentions of past abuse both physically and sexually involves Dean as a minor, though just barely, but be prepared.

It also includes a non-con rape type scene of the M/M variety. You have been warned.

IF YOU READ MY OTHER STORIES AND DO NOT READ UNRELATED SAM/DEAN SLASH, DO NOT READ THIS STORY.

Previous Chapter

Agent Richardson sat at his desk in the FBI's field office. He'd been going over the bombing and he was still having a hard time piecing together what had caused it. They'd been able to find remnants of detonation cord and part of an explosive device. But the problem was, they weren't the type of things used by terrorists…these were military in nature and had no place anywhere near a hospital.

The lack of motive was tripping up his investigation. Pressure was starting to increase from headquarters, the president wanted answers. A bomb had exploded on American soil and the people wanted heads to roll, they just didn't know whose.

His gaze dropped back to the stacks of paperwork and he groaned. Tyler leaned back in his leather chair and scrubbed a hand down his face in frustration. What's the connection here? Why this hospital? Why now? He furrowed his eyebrows, his hand dropping to scatter the papers all over the floor on accident.

"Damn-it!" He swore. Shaking his head, Tyler dropped to his knees and started cleaning up the scattered reports. One caught his attention as he stacked them carefully…Dr. Dean Winchester. He sank back onto his heels and started reading. The good doctor was ex-military. He perused the documents and raised an eyebrow when he read that the man had also been special operations. He'd served overseas on several tours and then finally been released after six long years. The report stated that he was highly decorated and respected among his peers and that he'd been involved in one black-op that had led to the death of another unit. Two men had survived Dean…and another one. The name had been redacted…but now he had a lead. But he would need to talk to the doctor again and then locate this second survivor.

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Chapter 14

We Can't Escape Our Past

Sam huffed as he looked at the mahogany wall clock again. The brilliant white ivory hands seeming to be stuck on the same numbers they'd been on four hours ago. It was well after midnight and he hadn't been able to leave the office yet. His thoughts kept spinning over to Dean and what was happening with him. Sam was finding that having the doctor out of his eyesight was stretching his last nerve paper-thin. A groan worked its way up his throat as he found his eyes once again drifting from the legal brief. A slight shake of the head was all it took to convince him that he needed to leave and get back to the hospital. He hadn' t wanted to go to work today, but the pile of cases and lack of other available partners had made it a necessity.

He shoved the pile of dockets into his briefcase as he stood and turned toward the door…a man blocking his doorway had him stopping instantly. "Agent Richardson…" He said as the man's face registered with a name. Sam blinked a couple times in surprise and then stepped forward to shake the FBI man's hand.

"Mr. Wesson." Richardson was nearly as tall as Sam and he looked like he could hold his own in a fight. The guy was no stranger to the gym and something about the way he moved caught Sam's eye…the guy was highly trained. But he had the friendliest azure blue eyes and an easy manner that made the lawyer less wary of him.

"Have you found something? Something about the bombing?" Sam was curious; he leaned against his desk, his hip resting idly against the edge. His blue-green gaze appraising the man staring at him from across the room.

Richardson's sharp eyes swept the office and stopped on a comfy looking leather chair in the corner. He gestured to the chair and waited for Sam's approval. At the slight nod, he shifted his weight and walked over, sinking in the soft brown leather. "Yes. I believe that I've found a connection. But I need to talk to Dr. Winchester and I wanted you to know what was going on."

Sam's eyebrows pulled together and he nodded. His entire demeanor showed that he was not only ready to hear what the federal officer had to say, but anxious to hear it. Thoughts of Dean and the fact that this sounded as though it was a connection between the doctor and the bombing went racing through his mind. "A connection?" Sam pressed. He turned so that he had a better eye line with the federal agent. "What type of connection?"

The man paused and sighed as he scrubbed a hand through his blonde hair. "A military connection." He watched as the lawyer sat back further on the desk and his eyes widened in surprise. "One that we think is quite personal to the man responsible."

Sam's mouth dropped open in silent denial, before he managed to ask a question. "So all those people…the ones that died…it was because some guy had a beef with Dean?" His face was a mask of grief as he waited for the other man to answer. How could they tell Dean that he was the cause of all those innocent peoples deaths? There's no way that his partner's feather soft heart could take that kind of truth.

"We believe so, yes." Richardson thinned his lips and exhaled slowly. "I know that this isn't the ideal time to talk to Mr. Winchester about this. But every day we wait, that trail is growing colder." He licked his lips and stood up, thrusting his hands into his pockets. "I wanna catch this son-of-a-bitch, Sam." He walked around the table to stand directly in front of the taller man. "But I can't do that without Dean's help." He looked away for a moment as a myriad of emotions flooded Sam's face. "God knows I wish I could. I wish there was a way to spare telling him…but I can't come up with one."

Sam gulped and popped his mouth closed. "No…no, you need to catch this guy. I just…this is going to kill Dean. He already feels so responsible for things that were out of his control…this is just one more thing." He stood up and crossed his arms over his broad chest. "I don't want it to be the thing that breaks him."

"I don't want that either, Sam." Blue eyes met blue-green and Sam could see the truth behind the words. This man wasn't happy about this development, but if he didn't follow it up, more people could die.

"Is there any way that you could wait to talk to him until he's more stable?" It was a long shot and Sam knew that the other man was going to deny him when he looked away from their eye connection.

"I'm afraid not. The doctors told me that he should be stable enough to talk to me at this point. My partner is flying in, she'll be here in the morning." The agent swallowed before continuing. "We'll be over then to talk to him…if you can be there, it might help."

"Uh…yeah. Of course I'll be there. Just please break this as gently as possible. Dean's a guilt magnet and you're carrying the mother load." Sam watched as the man smiled slightly and nodded.

"We will. I'll see you two in the morning." He turned to leave and then stopped. "I truly am sorry to do this to him, Sam." The agent never turned around, he just started walking again and silently left Sam to the horrific news.

Only a moment before Sam couldn't wait to get out the office and go see Dean. And now he was afraid that this revelation would be plastered all over his face if he did. How could he keep this type of thing from Dean…even for one evening. He'd never fancied himself a liar…he supposed that he could keep his face straight, since he was a very successful lawyer. But it had never occurred to him that he might have to use his professional skills against Dean. How do I do that? How do I protect him from his past? Sam knew the answer. He supposed in his heart he'd always known. He couldn't. The things that Dean's father had done to him as a child…the horror's that he'd face while serving his nation? They were things that Sam couldn't erase…burdens that he couldn't carry.

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Anna stared at out the sunset, her face a peaceful mask of innocence and Dean stared at Anna. They'd both always had a thing for the sunsets. He wondered if it was because that was always how the great movies ended…the heroes riding off into the sunset after defeating the bad guy. But no one was more aware of the fact that their life wasn't a movie and sure as hell wasn't a happy ending in it for them. He closed his eyes as the thought of this…of course; generally the bad guys weren't the heroes' fathers. Unless one was willing to count the all time classic space cowboy movie…Star Wars.

"Think he's still passed out?" She asked quietly. Dean watched as the innocence faded from her eyes and she shifted back into a far too knowing small adult. Anna wasn't an idiot. She'd seen the multitude of new bruises that appeared on her brother's face every time her father went on a bender. She'd taken him to the hospital, for crying out loud, every time things got out of hand with their father. And then there was that one afternoon she'd come home early from a friends slumber party and found her brother sprawled throughout the shattered glass of their cheap coffee table. He'd been nearly naked, unconscious, and had almost died as a result of what an unknown 'man' had done to him. Dean had later told her that it'd been a stranger, but deep in her heart she'd always wondered…but there was no proof. The memories of what she'd seen that night still haunted her dreams and she hated that she knew beyond doubt that her brother had been molested as a child.

"I don't know." He answered. The rich timbre of Dean's voice making her feel safe. Her older brother's voice always had that effect of her. "I hope so."

She turned and looked at him, a smile working its way onto her face. "We could leave, Dean. Just run away from here…from him?" She never even considered how they would live. Neither of them was old enough not to attract the attention of Child Protective Services.

Dean snorted. "Yeah, and the first time CPS saw me and you out without an adult…they'd take you away from me." He looked at her, his eyes echoing a pain so deep that she instantly regretted the suggestion, and reached up to pat her knee. "I can't let them do that, Anna. Put you in the system. Hell, put 'me' in the system. We'd lose each other." She was the one good thing that he had in his life and there was no way that he was going to let a state agency dictate whether or not they were together.

"Okay." She smiled and leaned her head against his shoulder as her eyes drifted shut and she just enjoyed the last remnants of the evening with her brother.

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The dream faded into the deep colorful recesses of Dean's mind as he pushed toward awareness again. He wasn't sure how long he'd been out this time. The medication was playing fast and loose with his mental navigation system. The tight dry pinch to his throat told him that it'd been at least a few hours. Which meant that Sam should be coming back…if he wasn't already in the room. He sent his eyes roaming the dark corners of the hospital ICU room and frowned when he didn't see any sign of Sam. It wasn't like Sam could hide his enormous body anyways.

He blinked several times as the fact that he was utterly alone slipped in and cooled his heart. Dean's throat bobbed as the force swallowed and then he groaned as his head exploded in pain. When is this going to let up? He wondered silently as he dropped his eyelids closed and just focused on breathing.

He was still trying to piece together the day that his life had exploded. Dean had no clue what had happened at the hospital. Why he'd survived? Had there been something about him that was somehow so damaged that life had sought to take him out? He pulled his eyebrows together in frustration and shook his head slowly. That's stupid Dean. The world is not trying to punish you for being alive.

"Dean…" Sam's rich velvety voice pulled him back from the dangerous line of thinking. The feather soft tingle of fingers skimming over his naked forearm had him shoving his eyelids open. It took a moment for Sam to start to focus as he stared at the large blurry Sam-shaped blob.

"Sammy…where've you been?" He whispered as Sam's fingers rubbed gentle circles into his muscles. Just the presence of Sam was enough to make him settle further into the soft pillows that were propping him up. It was an experimental technique, the nurses were using to try and take the pressure off his heart and the nasty breaks in his ribs.

"Dean…I'm sorry. I got caught up at the office…" Sam's voice was soft and apologetic as he stared into the jade eyes of his partner.

"Guess that's what happens when you've been out for two weeks." Dean mumbled. He didn't feel badly that Sam had been with him, but he certainly understood how quickly one's work could pile up. He wasn't looking forward the backlog of patients and cases that he'd be attending to once he got out of this hospital. And the sooner he could talk them into making that decision, the better.

Sam's throat rumbled as he chuckled. He leaned in and ghosted a whisper of a kiss across Dean's plump lips. He was careful to pull away quickly, since he didn't want a repeat of the other day. Sam wasn't sure that his heart could handle much of that. It was hard enough to see Dean in this place, his face pale and his breathing labored, without knowing that he'd sent the doctor over the edge…like earlier this week. "Very true. Although the other partners have been splitting my case load, so I wasn't nearly as behind as I could have been." He grinned and applied a tiny bit of pressure to Dean's wrist in emphasis.

"You're gonna have to do something nice for them…dinner maybe." Dean said simply.

"Already ahead of you. I'm taking a pro-bono case from each of them." Dean smiled. He knew that it wasn't a stretch for Sam to take on the free cases that his law firm accepted. It was a PR stunt for the firm, but Sam actually believed in helping those that couldn't help themselves. And since he wasn't in it for the money, Sam put his whole heart into those cases.

A sharp stab of pain lurched through Dean and he ground his teeth together as he waited for it to pass. Sam watched, feeling helpless, as he too waited for the other man to reopen his eyes. "I'm fine, Sam…" He said as his eyelids slid slowly apart, revealing glassy green irises.

Sam didn't answer. He licked his lips and stood up, he settled gently next to Dean's hip and then leaned back against the mountain of pillows. Dean shifted just enough to lie against the long ribcage and stretch his long lean legs out blow him. "You're not…but you're alive. I'll take that." He swallowed around the lump that formed in his throat. "Agent Richardson came to see me."

Dean turned his head slightly and his eyes widened in surprise. "What did he want?"

"He wants to talk to you." Sam said quietly.

"But I don't know anything…" Dean answered softly.

Sam inhaled and tried to determine how much he should say to Dean. He didn't want to send him down a self-pity path…but he also didn't feel good not telling his partner what he knew. The lies that he'd dealt with in his short life had been far too damaging for Dean. And Sam knew that of all the things that the man could handle from him…lies was not one of them.

"He's found a connection he wants to explore." He felt Dean shift again and that drew his blue-green gaze down to the smaller man.

"A connection? Like between me and the bomber?" The words tumbled out of Dean's mouth and he could feel the hysteria building in his stomach. His past was coming back to haunt him…he just wasn't sure which part of his rotten past it was.

Sam inhaled deeply. "I don't how much I can tell you…not because I wouldn't, just because I don't know all that much. He said something about a catastrophe with a unit…" He was just about to continue when all the color drained from Dean's face and he sagged back against the pillows.

"The bomb…it was military grade wasn't it?" He asked.

Sam nodded.

"He promised it was over…" Dean whispered before he shifted and tried to move away from Sam. He needed to call this Agent Richardson and he needed to do it now…because this thing wasn't over.

TBC…

Author's Note: Thanks to everyone that read and reviewed the last chapter. I owe this one to LeeMarieJack who is a quiet but persistent requester of updates.

PLEASE REVIEW: I could really use the pick-me-up. Thank you.