Fast update, fast update, fast update, fast update.

Enjoy.

October 1st, 2020

"Jae, table three needs another order of Pirao Pork, and an extra set of silverware," Jinx said as she walked past him. Her brow was furrowed, her gaze focused, and her bright blue hair kept in a high and tight bun.

I paused. "Wait, another set of silverware? I thought there were only five of them."

Jinx shrugged. "Ask Ori." She tapped her wristwatch. "I'm on break for fifteen."

"Jinx—"

She spun on her heel and waved at him. "Technically not at work right now!" She announced, her blue bun bobbing along with her steps.

I let out a deep sigh. What I would give to have a break right now. I wrote down the extra order of Pirao Pork on a piece of scratch paper, tore it off my notebook, and hung it up in the kitchen. "Pirao Pork to table three," I said to Kayn, adjusting the position of my mask. "How long?"

Kayn managed to hear me perfectly, even through all of the raucous in the kitchen. He glanced up at the clock, then his table, and then at me. "Gonna need another fifteen." He gave an affirmative nod.

Despite the business of working at the Grand Vastaya, it was incredibly fulfilling, even if I was five years into working here. Everything from the environment, to the pay, and especially the people— my coworkers specifically— made it all the more bearable.

The rest of the night went smoothly, the customers at table three all tipped well, something that I'm certain Jinx would be happy about. Everyone gathered in the middle of the floor as we prepared to put up all of the chairs and make sure the restaurant was ready to open for tomorrow.

"So, Jinx," Xayah said while wiping down the table. "You're graduating this year. Any idea what you're gonna do after?"

The blue-haired girl— though, she was a woman now, I supposed— shrugged. It was still strange to not see Jinx with her signature twin-tails and that manic look in her eye. Over the course of the last two months, her personality had been far more tame than the Jinx that I was used to. Of course, she still had her moments of forgetfulness or rebellion, but she seemed more and more professional by the day.

"Not sure," Jinx replied. "I do know that I'm going out of state though."

"That is rather surprising, Jinx," Ori commented.

"Really? Why?"

"You seem comfortable here." Ori smiled. "If it were me, I would like to stay where I am most comfortable and never leave."

"Well, that's just the difference between you and me." Jinx, even through the mask that covered half of her face, noticeably grinned. "I like being a little bit uncomfortable."

Orianna hummed, a finger resting on her chin. "I see."

"It's good that you're broadening your horizons," Rakan added. "But we're gonna miss you over here."

"You won't miss me too much," Jinx said. "Who knows, you might forget about me in a year."

Xayah looked absolutely offended. "We would never!"

Rakan tilted his head in Xayah's direction. "What she said."

Jinx scratched the side of her face with a finger. "Well, it's not like I'm leaving right now. I still have until next June."

Rakan turned to me. "How about you, Jae?"

"Wh-what about me?"

"How's your music stuff going? Make any huge hits lately?"

Even though he meant it jokingly, the simplicity of his words pierced my heart. "I…" I trailed off. "Yeah." I attempted a chuckle. "I'm an up-and-coming star, didn't you know?"

"Are you really?" Ori asked. "Does this mean you'll finally share your music with us?"

"Ori that— I was joking." I rubbed the back of my neck. "It's… a little hard for me to make music right now."

Ori's countenance softened. "Oh."

"But it's okay! I've been hard at work doing other things," I said with a smile that I hoped reached my eyes. "I've got a second job on the way too, so that's exciting."

"A second job?" Kayn asked. "You already work fifty hours a week here, why do you need a second job?"

"My sister's planning to go back to school soon," I explained. "And once she's there, we're gonna need the money."

"She's not gonna take out a loan?" Xayah questioned.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure how interested she is in getting a loan, especially when we already have my student debt to pay off."

"That's understandable," Jinx said.

Xayah and Rakan glanced at each other before looking at me worryingly. As Xayah opened her mouth to talk, I subtly shook my head. I did my best to convey that I didn't want to talk about it through my gaze, and it seems like she picked up on it. Her mouth shut, and she turned to Rakan, a pleading look in her eyes.

Rakan put a hand on her shoulder, and then mouthed to me. "We'll talk later."

We all returned to work wiping down the tables and chairs, setting the clean chairs upside down on the tables, then sweeping and mopping the floor. Once we finished, Jinx, Ori, and Kayn all clocked out and headed to their cars.

"See you tomorrow," I called.

"Later, Jae."

"See ya!"

"Have a good night, Jae."

I closed the front door behind them and headed into Rakan's office. The normally cluttered room was being cleaned up by Xayah while Rakan sat behind his desk, a hand on the mouse and his eyes trained on the monitor. His eyes flicked up to me as I walked in.

"Have a seat." He waved to the chair in front of his desk.

I did as he instructed, resting my hands on the arms of the chair.

"Are you doing okay?" He asked. Concern laced his words.

I rubbed the back of my neck. "I'm doing as well as I can, I suppose."

"Is there anything that either of us can do to help?" He continued. "You know that we're both willing to help, right?"

"I know, I know," I replied. "I don't think I want your help right now." More like I don't deserve it, actually. "But I appreciate it."

"Jae—"

"Please," I immediately interjected. "I will let you know if I need your help. At all. I promise." The last thing that I wanted from either of them was a handout. And I knew that they wanted to help. That they were so ready, and so willing to. But it felt wrong to ask something of them. And I knew that Eunkyung wasn't interested in it either.

"Jae, stop being so prideful," Xayah called out. "We want to help. Please, just let us help."

"It's not a matter of pride," I argued. "It's… I don't know." The argument died on my lips.

"Xayah and I agreed to give you and your sister $2,000." Rakan smiled slightly. "You should receive it in about two days."

"Wait, no, that's way too much—"

"Jae," Xayah quickly cut through my words. "You alone have boosted our profits by thirty percent. Ever since we hired you, you've been responsible for a large part of our business, even if you're not in a managerial position. In all honesty, Rakan and I think we've been underpaying you because of how much of your time you give us."

"But that much money is…" I trailed off. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes. I furiously attempted to wipe them away. "I— We don't deserve it."

"It's not about whether or not you deserve it, Jae," Rakan countered. "You don't owe anyone's approval, especially when they want to help you. We… We love you, Jae. Genuinely. And you've done more for us than you know." He stood up, and he extended his arms towards me.

Carefully, cautiously, and with all of the hesitance in the world, Rakan and Xayah wrapped me in a warm, tight hug.

"Thank you," I whispered hoarsely.

"No," Xayah replied, running a hand through my hair. "Thank you, Jae. For everything."

[;]

October 15th, 2020

Ever since that day, Xayah and Rakan have been steadily sending Eunkyung and I money. Anywhere from $500 to $1,000 dollars every few days. From what they told me, it was hardly a dent in their own income. After all, The Grand Vastaya was one of L.A.'s most prominent and popular restaurants, a feat that one could hardly call easy.

But even with their help, Eunkyung and I both knew we would still need more money. Student loan debt was no joke. And neither was the cost of re-entering school.

"Did you get an interview for that job yet?" Eunkyung asked with her nose buried into her textbook. She'd been assigned a large chunk of reading for the weekend, something like two hundred pages.

"It was yesterday."

"Did you get it?"

I nodded. "I start tomorrow." The job that she and I were talking about was working as a customer service rep at an insurance hotline company. It's funny, when I first told Eunkyung about it, she told me that it was too 'normal' of a job for me. To which I reminded her that I've been working as a waiter for the better part of five years. Customer service was right up my alley. Sure, it was over-the-phone work, but it paid well and wasn't that much of a commitment. Just three to six hours working the graveyard shift.

The company was built around giving those without insurance the quickest and easiest path to getting insured. So, getting calls in the middle of an emergency situation was commonplace.

"Still can't believe you took that job."

"Not sure why you can't believe it." I crossed my arms. "It pays $30 an hour, which is about as good as working at the Vastaya, minus the tips."

"Still can't believe that Xayah and Rakan are giving us money either."

"Yeah. You're telling me."

Eunkyung looked up from her textbook. Then, she set it down atop the table, closed it, and pushed it away. "So, when are you gonna tell me what happened between you and Seraphine?"

"We…" I trailed off as I tried to find the right words. "We had a disagreement. We're just taking some time to ourselves, that's all."

"Taking some time to yourselves," Eunkyung repeated with a snort. "Is that why you haven't so much as touched your instruments in the last two months?"

"That's unrelated."

She raised a brow. "About as unrelated as you and me." Eunkyung crossed her arms. "Jae, I don't get it. Just tell me what's going on."

I shook my head. "Another time, Noona. I… I need time to think about it still." I stood up. "Have a good night." I pushed in my chair and headed into my room, shutting the door behind me. It would only be a matter of time before my sister decided that she wasn't willing to wait for me to think about it, and when that time did come, she would repeatedly prod me for an answer until I gave one.

But there was still time.

Until then…

I rested my hands on my hips and stared at the numerous instrument cases beneath my desk, everything from the strings to the MIDI keyboards— the dust that had begun to gather atop them, and even the places that they'd remained for the better part of two months.

What Eunkyung said was true.

I wasn't making music anymore.

I hadn't even so much as opened Ableton.

And, in all honesty, the last thing on my mind was music.

Ever since Seraphine got that call, the world was at a standstill.

It felt like she was moving at lightspeed, while I was stuck in slow-motion.

At the end of last month, K/DA announced their new, personal label, ICONS. And, as expected, Seraphine was the first artist to be signed to ICONS. I saw her face on nearly every billboard, on the cover of nearly every magazine that I came across, and whenever I scrolled through the internet, I saw her face in promotions and advertisements on YouTube.

One would think that after not making contact with Seraphine for two months, she would be easier to avoid. It seemed, however, that the world had entirely different plans for me.

I bent down and began to pull my instrument cases out from underneath the desk. One by one, I stacked them beside my bed. Then, I pulled open my closet door. I did my best to not think through what I was doing. To not ask why I was doing it.

Part of me. Maybe a small, tiny part of me knew that what I was doing was wrong.

But right now— in this one, exact moment— it felt right.

I stuffed every single one of my instruments into my closet. I shoved them as far back as they could possibly go.

I wanted them gone.

I wanted them out of my sight.

I wanted every memory I had of her, every moment we shared, to be the last thing on my mind.

It had to be the right thing to do.

It was the right thing to do.

Right?

[;]

October 31st, 2020 The car door locked with a soft click! Rain pattered over my umbrella and atop the cobblestone surface of the pathway to the graveyard. My hands were freezing. My feet were cold, even though they were encased in two layers of socks and a pair of thick, black leather shoes. And even with the mask that I wore, my face was still numb. Rain bothered me. It always rained on this day.

Except when Sera—

"Jae," Eunkyung called, and I was thankful for her interruption.

"Sorry." I jogged to catch up with her. I adjusted the bundle of flowers that I carried.

"I thought you would be ahead of me considering how much you hate the rain," she joked, managing to make me crack a smile.

"Well, you know me. I love to keep Mom and Dad waiting."

"Annoying brat." She adjusted the sleeve of her black blazer. "C'mon, we've kept them waiting long enough."

I fell into step beside her until we were standing in front of our parents' headstones.

"No flowers this year."

"Yeah." It wasn't a surprise. With the pandemic, people hardly wanted to leave their homes. Still, it made me a little sad. Mom and Dad always got flowers from people other than us. I handed Eunkyung my umbrella and kneeled down in front of the headstones, placing the flowers evenly between Mom and Dad.

No fighting over them, I thought with a smile.

"Are you gonna talk to them first?"

I shook my head. "I'll talk after you. Go ahead." I stood back up and let Eunkyung take my place as I held one umbrella over her.

Her conversation was quick. She stood up and took both umbrellas from me with a nod.

"That was fast," I commented.

Eunkyung shrugged. "Didn't have much to say. But you, on the other hand…" She trailed off.

"Yeah. I've got a lot to talk about."

Hey Mom. Hey Dad, I began, closing my eyes. I… You know, at the beginning of this year, I was really worried. When the pandemic hit, I thought that everything would be ruined. My graduation wasn't even in-person, I couldn't go to work for nearly three months, and I was stuck at home all the time. But… But it wasn't that bad.

I'm still making music, obviously. I'm still fr— friends with Ser— Seraphine. Things are going well. Really well. Super well. I'm the happiest that I've been in a long time, and I'm excited to announce that I think I'll be able to keep making music because of how successful my EPs with Seraphine have been.

Exciting, right? The future, for once, is looking pretty bright for your favorite son. I smiled slightly. Oh! And Eunkyung's going back to school, but I'm sure she already told you that. Still not entirely sure how we're going to pay for it. Regardless, I'm sure we'll find a way.

I… I really miss you guys. This year more than ever.

Please continue to watch over us. Keep us safe. Keep us healthy. Keep us sane.

Remind us to take care of ourselves.

I love you both so much.

I opened my eyes and glanced around, searching for any sign of—

"Ready to go?" Eunkyung asked.

"Yeah." I stood up. "I'm ready."

[;]

On the car ride home, Eunkyung spoke up, both hands on the wheel and her eyes trained on the road. "Did you tell them that you wanted to give up music?"

"I… I didn't."

She sighed. "Jae.."

"I know, I know." I glanced out my window. "It's just… It's hard for me to admit that to them." A cold feeling settled around my heart and in my chest.

"If you're serious about it, it shouldn't be." Eunkyung calmly switched lanes towards the exit ramp of the highway. When she finished the switch, she glanced at me. "You are serious about it, right?"

I glanced back at her. The chill rose up to my throat. Tears pricked at the edge of my eyes as I desperately fought them back. "Yes. I am." The words bled through my lips, through choked back sobs.

I meant every word.

I forced myself to mean every word.

I'd made the decision to cut myself off from music two weeks ago.

When I put my instruments away.

When I combed through my computer and wiped every single music-related file on it.

When I removed my names from the songs and EPs that Seraphine and I posted.

When I packed my feelings into a box and shipped it to a place where I hoped against all hope that I would forget them.

Through her furrowed brows, her pursed lips, and the unsteadiness of her eyes, Eunkyung nodded. "Okay," she said. "I believe you."

So... We're in angst territory now. Don't worry! Next chapter will be better :) A lot better :)

CPG117 - Everything IS on fire! We've passed the turning point of Act 2, and we've entered the part where everything goes wrong! Thanks for enjoying the twist, I've had it saved it for nearly a year now.

Emberswords - Well, here's a LOT more of Jae! And since both he and Seraphine are separate now, we'll be having chapters switching between their perspectives, as the story is about the both of them. I hope that Seraphine's parts are as interesting as Jae's! I try to make them like that.

Kevin Naits - I wouldn't say that Seraphine can't do anything without Jae. She suffers from anxiety, and when performing in front of one's idols for the first time, without the support of her friend, that would be the result. And I wouldn't go as far as to say that Jae was betrayed. He's not entirely in the right here either.

Thank you everyone for leaving a review. If you enjoyed the chapter, please leave another! They really help me get these chapters out a lot faster :P

Next Chapter: Between 2/19/2021 or 2/26/2021- Entirely depends on how inspired I'm feeling.