One step closer to the end.

Enjoy.

February 3rd, 2021

Ever since last November, Seraphine's life remained at a standstill. As much as she sought after her brief hurricanes, her momentary whirlwinds, they didn't keep her occupied enough for it to really matter. These days, her mind wandered around as lazily as she did.

She knew that she wasn't getting anything done. And whenever the girls came back home from their busy schedules, it was hard— near impossible, basically— to not compare herself to them.

But today, Seraphine was going to get something done.

Last week, she'd found the courage to call the only person of her past life that she believed would meet up with her: Luxanna Crownguard.

"Hello?" Seraphine asked. She held her phone fast against her ear, listening intently for even the slightest sound. "Lux?" She tried.

There was some light shuffling. "Sera?" Lux replied. "Wow, I'm surprised you still have my number."

"Oh." The underhanded insult didn't go unnoticed, but Seraphine didn't let it deter her. "I… I guess I'll get straight to the point, then. Do you mind if we meet up?"

"You want to meet up?" Lux hummed. "Okay, sure. But on one condition."

"Really? Okay, sure. Yes." Seraphine nodded furiously, even though she knew that Lux couldn't see her. "Whatever you want, whatever you need. As long as you and I can see each other."

"Then we'll meet at the Vastaya."

"Wait, the Vast—"

"Next week, I'll be there at 12 P.M.," Lux said quickly. "See you there!"

And the call ended before Searphine could even respond.
She sighed, setting down her phone. Guess it's time to face the music.

[;]

Seraphine adjusted the sleeves of her jacket as she stepped out of her car. Despite the fact that she hadn't been to the Vastaya in the last six months, she still knew the way there.

But the Vastaya itself was different. It'd changed. Seraphine was expecting the same building, the same employees, and the same environment to greet her as she entered, but she could not have been more wrong.

There were a few new faces working, and a couple old ones.

The host, as always it seemed, was none other than Orianna. She spotted Seraphine, and her normally blank and stoic eyes lit up.

"Good afternoon, Seraphine," greeted Orianna. "Do you have a reservation for today? Or are you just visiting?"

"Nice to see you again, Ori." Seraphine ran a hand through her hair. "Is Lux here? She and I are meeting up today."

"Very well, I will take you to her." Ori moved from her position behind the desk and began to walk to the back of the Vastaya.

As they walked, Seraphine frantically glanced around, desperately trying to see whether or not Jae was working.

"Are you looking for someone, Seraphine?" Orianna asked.

"I— No, I'm not."

Orianna glanced at her. Then, without a single word, returned her attention back to where she was walking.

Seraphine spotted Lux sitting alone inside of a booth. Her blonde hair was plaited, and she had her phone out and was typing something rather intensely.

"Here is your table," Orianna said. "Your server will be right with you."

Lux glanced up from her phone and motioned for Seraphine to take a seat across from her. Once Seraphine did, she set down her phone, nodding to Orianna. "Thanks, Ori."

"It is no problem, Lux." She smiled, and Orianna quickly returned to her post, leaving the two girls alone.

"So," Lux began. "How are you?"

"I'm alright," Seraphine replied, still glancing around. "I've—"

"You can take it easy," Lux interjected, her eyes narrowed. "He's not working today."

"He— He's not?"

Lux nodded once. "I figured that you wouldn't be able to handle seeing him again, so I picked a day that he wasn't working."

"I… I appreciate it."

"Good," Lux said simply.

Seraphine visibly calmed down. She let out a small breath as she spoke up. "And you? How have you been?"

"I'm doing well.'' Lux thumbed the side of her phone. "Going to work, keeping busy, that's all."

"Where do you work?" Seraphine asked.

Lux motioned to the area around them. "I still work here, and I help out at my parents' company too."

Seraphine chuckled. "More productive than me, to be honest."

"Well, I suppose you should get on that," was Lux's curt reply. The blonde sighed. "Seraphine, why did you ask to meet? And why meet with me?"

"Who else was I supposed to meet with?"

Lux rolled her eyes. "If you're too blind to see that, then maybe this—"

"Hey, ladies!" A youthful, arrogant voice slid into the conversation. It was one of the new hires. A young, blonde man whose blue eyes nearly matched the brilliance of Lux's.

"…Ezreal."

Ezreal winked in her direction. "Hey, Lux. Who's your pretty friend?"

"No one you would want to get involved with," Lux grumbled. "Are you our server?"

"Yup!"

"Oh great."

Ezreal whipped out his notepad with a flourish. "So, what can I get started for you two fine ladies today? Anything to drink?"

"Just two waters," Lux quickly replied.

"Alright! I'll be right back with those." And the young man was off.

"He's… excitable," Seraphine reasoned.

"Annoying is more like it," Lux mumbled. "Can't take a hint for his life."

"That's just how younger guys are, I think."

"Yeah, and I have half the heart to tell him that Jae and I are dating just so he can stop bothering me. Like seriously, it's really, really getting on my nerves now." Lux scratched her hair, clearly frustrated.

Seraphine did her best to ignore the first half of that sentence. "Do you think that something like that would work?"

Lux shrugged. "Probably. It wouldn't hurt to try."

"Why not just tell Jae about Ezreal? I'm sure he would do something about it."

"Jae is… busy with a lot of things right now. I don't want to burden him with something that I can solve on my own."

"How… How is he?"

Lux raised a brow, and leaned back in the seat with her arms crossed. She glared daggers at Seraphine. "You have his phone number, don't you? Why don't you just call him?"

"It's not that easy. I don't think that's the best way to approach him," Seraphine argued.

"Then figure it out," Lux shot back. "You're the one who was in love with him after all."

"And you weren't?" Seraphine retorted.

"My feelings for Jae change nothing here," Lux hissed. "You're the one that asked how he was."

"And you could just give a simple response. I wasn't asking for you to spy on him. I wasn't asking for you to tell me how the last six months of his life have been. I just want to know if he's doing well."

Lux glowered. "He's doing a lot better than how you left him."

Seraphine pursed her lips as she nodded mutely. "Good. That's good." Seraphine was surprised how good it felt to hear how Jae was doing. It was like a weight had been taken off of her shoulders.

"Are you okay?" Lux asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Doing better now, honestly." Seraphine smiled. "Thanks for telling me how he's doing."

"Don't mention it."

Ezreal came by and dropped off their drinks. "Are you two ready to order?"

"We'll just have my usual," Lux replied.

"The… the both of you?"

"Yeah." Lux waved her hand dismissively, akin to someone slapping away a fly. "Thanks, Ezreal."

"Alright, I'll go put in the order." And he was gone once again.

"You know," Seraphine began. "You're pretty scary when you're annoyed. Guess he really is more than just a little oblivious."

"Yeah, you're telling me." Lux leaned forward. "Do you mind if I ask you something?"

"Go for it."

"Are you over him now?" Lux asked.

"I… I don't really know." Sera rubbed the back of her neck. "Though, I think it'd be okay if he forgot me."

"Forgot you?" Lux repeated.

"Forgot about me. Forgot everything about me."

"Really?"

Sera nodded solemnly.

"And that doesn't hurt you at all?"

"That's the worst part." She looked at Lux, pain barely concealed beneath her azure gaze. "I wish it did."

"You… wish that it hurt you?" Lux sounded like she couldn't believe it.

"It sounds stupid, right?" Seraphine scoffed. "But it's true. I… I deserve it, for what I did to him. For everything that I did to him."

"Seraphine, you can remedy it. You can fix it. All you need to do is call him—"

The singer's fist slammed down onto the table with a crash! The utensils and plates clattered in response. "I can't!" Seraphine knuckles whitened. "I can't. I want to. So badly. So desperately. But every time I try…" She trailed off, looking pleadingly in Lux's direction.

"I… I get it, Sera," Lux said. She reached across the table and placed her hand over Seraphine's. "It's okay. I'll stop pressuring you about it."

Seraphine let out a deep sigh, her body visibly loosening up. "Thank you." She cleared her throat. "So, are you and Jae dating?" Seraphine entirely expected Lux to respond negatively to her question, but was pleasantly surprised when she responded earnestly.

"Nope!" Lux giggled. "He and I… shared a moment during Christmas, and he asked if we were dating after. I rejected him."

"'Shared a moment?'"

"We had sex."

"Oh." Seraphine pursed her lips. "Not sure what else I expected." She quickly moved on before her thoughts could linger on that new piece of information. "You rejected him? I thought you had the biggest crush on him since forever."

"I did," Lux explained. "But after he ghosted me for a whole year, I figured that it was for the best that he and I didn't date."

"Fair enough," Seraphine replied. She took a drink of her water before continuing. "I'm sorry if this is intrusive, but… How is Jae's music doing?"

"He actually got a record deal two days ago,"Lux slowly revealed.

"That— That's great!" exclaimed Seraphine. "Do you know what label?"

"SHINE Entertainment," Lux said.

Seraphine recognized the name. SHINE had other big-name artists signed to them, the biggest being Pentakill. According to Evelynn, Pentakill actually wanted to be signed with SHINE, even though the entire band had a penchant for working without a label.

"That's good," Seraphine said with a smile. "He's in good hands then."

The rest of the meeting went amicably. The two girls talked about better things, about simpler things. And they both walked away from the meeting feeling better than they started it.

"It was nice to see you again, Lux," Seraphine said, standing up from the table after they paid for their lunch. She tucked the straps of her mask behind her ear.

"The same for you, Sera." Lux grinned. "We should talk more."

"Definitely." Seraphine nodded.

"I'll see you around, then?" Lux asked as she slipped her mask back on.

"I'll see you around," Seraphine confirmed.

[;]

February 19th, 2021

Seraphine laid on her bed, absentmindedly drawing circles on the ceiling with her eyes. Her talk with Lux was over two weeks ago, but there was a part of it that still bothered her, that still remained on her mind— it was what she'd told Lux in regards to her feelings about Jae.

About whether or not she was over him.

About whether or not she wanted to be forgotten.

And it was then that Seraphine realized just how much she'd meant it. How much she wanted to forget. How much she wanted to move on from him. A cloud of emotions swarmed her mind, everything from sorrow to joy, from pain to pleasure, from longing to loneliness, and a crushing amount of regret.

Seraphine groggily rose to her feet and sat before her computer.

And she wrote.

She wrote everything.

She wrote everything that she wished she told him.

Everything that she wanted to tell him, but couldn't.

Everything that she knew she should have said, but failed to.

And that night, Yeng Seraphine created her first lead single.

It's Ok If You Forget Me.

[;]

"I don't feel sorry for myself, care if your hands touch somebody else. Wouldn't get jealous if you're happy, it's okay if you forget me," Seraphine sang, her voice cracking as she poured every ounce of emotion that she had into it. "I don't feel empty now that you're gone. Does that mean it didn't mean nothing at all? But I'll tell you what the worst is: it's the way it doesn't hurt, when I wish it did." As she sang, several other voices along with her in perfect harmony. A ear-filling bass closed the gaps in her voice, and the rhythmic strumming of an acoustic guitar tightened the entire soundspace.

The instruments dropped out, leaving nothing but a nearly undetectable synth and Seraphine's acapella vocals. "From everything to nothing at all, from every day to never at all, and everyone says that I should be sad, is it normal that…"

The rest of the instruments crescendoed back just as the chorus returned. "I don't feel sorry for myself, care if your hands touch somebody else. Wouldn't get jealous if you're happy, it's okay if you forget me," Seraphine grasped the microphone with both hands. "I don't feel empty now that you're gone. Does that mean it didn't mean nothing at all? But I'll tell you what the worst is: it's the way it doesn't hurt, when I wish it did." A sob nearly escaped her lips in the middle of the recording. "I wish it did…"

[;]

March 13th, 2021

"Someone's been busy," Ahri observed as Seraphine came down the stairs and into the living room, an empty takeout box in hand. "That's the fifth time I've seen you with takeout this week."

Seraphine chuckled shyly. "Well, you know me, trying to stay busy and all that."

"And how's the album coming along?" Ahri asked.

"I'm getting a lot more progress now than I have been the last couple of months," explained Sera.

"Good." Ahri nodded. "Well, don't let me stop you now." She winked. "Go get 'em."

Seraphine thanked Ahri before dumping her box into the kitchen trash can and grabbing a snack, before heading back upstairs.

The girls steadily kept up with Seraphine, with all of them, on more than one occasion, popping into her room to check up on her. They usually found her sitting in front of her studio computer, writing lyrics, or mixing a song, or producing a track, or recording vocals.

That was what Seraphine's life was like for the last few weeks.

Wake up, produce, write, or record for an entire day, and then head to bed.

As much as Seraphine loved making music, she couldn't deny that it felt more than a little draining. Day-in, day-out she worked and worked and worked.

"I'll never understand how Jae ever did this," Seraphine said tiredly as she absentmindedly scrolled up and down the Ableton project file. The numerous multi-colored tracks lighting up the screen like a rainbow. "Working on music for twelve hours a day…" Sera trailed off into a groan. "I probably look like a goblin." Then, she pushed her chair back from her desk and stood up to stretch.

Doesn't hurt to take a small break, right?

Seraphine glanced around at her mess of a room. Drained water bottles were strewn across the floor, as were empty takeout boxes and plastic boxes. Numerous loose piles of paper and colored notebooks laid on her unmade bed. She hadn't even taken so much as a spare minute to clean up her room.

Seraphine let out a breath. "Alright, let's get this cleaned!"

[;]

April 9th, 2021

"It's out."

Seraphine sat in the studio of the K/DA house. Akali, Ahri, Kai'Sa, and Evelynn all stood or sat behind her. They all watched, with bated breath, as Seraphine's music video played on the large TV they kept in the room.

It was a simply shot video, minimal editing, the camera following Seraphine as she walked through the empty streets of downtown L.A. Her song, It's Okay If You Forget Me, the lead single off of her debut album, encompassing the entirety of the audio.

Despite the video containing no one but Seraphine herself, the song allowed the feelings behind Seraphine's acting to be conveyed perfectly. Everything from the way her hands traced the walls, how her feet seemed to slightly drag behind her with every step, how the tears that gathered in her eyes seemed to forever be on the verge of spilling free but somehow managing to keep it all inside, it all told the story of a young woman who had more regrets than she wanted to admit— and how she wanted nothing more than to be free of them

As the video came to an end, all of K/DA was left in stunned silence.

"That was… brilliant," Ahri said as she rubbed her eyes.

"Gotta agree with Ahri here."

"Same."

"Amazingly written, darling."

Seraphine smiled. "Thank you. It means a lot to hear that from you guys."

Her phone pinged, and a text notification lit up the screen.

It was from Lux.

Hey! I just watched your music video. It was so good! I'll listen to the rest of the album on my way to work tomorrow. Have a good night, Sera. And congratulations!

Seraphine grinned at the message as she quickly typed back her appreciation of Lux's support. When she finished, she returned her full attention to the girls as they began to listen to the album in its entirety.

Her heart swelled while she listened to all of them talk about the album, about how each song sounded, about what they loved about every song, and about how much they respected Seraphine as both an artist and a person.

And Seraphine couldn't have asked for a better night on the release of her album.

[;]

Seraphine stared up at the ceiling, a faraway look in her eyes.

She'd done it.

She'd written, produced, mixed, and created an album on her own. Every second, every sound, every moment of ALONE was her own. It was her own and no one else's. There was something magical about that— about what that meant to her. So much work, all going towards a single, life-defining project. It was amazing. It felt amazing. She felt like she was on top of the world.

And the album performed well too. Much better than Seraphine anticipated. In all honesty, she was afraid that the internet would tear it apart, that critics would rip it to shreds, but that was not the case. She knew better than to attach success to something like public opinion. However, Seraphine knew that artists lived and died by their ability to compete. And debuting at #2 on the Billboard 200 on her first-ever album with a label was no small achievement.

The lead song, It's Okay If You Forget Me, placed high on the charts as well, in addition to the album itself.

Seraphine chuckled. I guess a lot of people out there are heartbroken.

She adjusted the way that she was laying on her bed and ran a hand through her hair.

A wave of unease surged through her.

Heartbroken… She rolled her eyes, burying her head into her pillow. Guess I am too, huh?

Seraphine placed a hand over her heart. There was something she couldn't understand about the album, however. Even after its release, even after the hours upon hours of work that she poured into it, even after its impressive performance, Seraphine still felt empty.

By all metrics, she was successful now.

She made it.

She was a singer.

She was an idol.

She was a star.

So why didn't it feel like she was?

Why did she feel worse than she did before she finished the album?

Why did it feel like she was more lonely than ever?

Seraphine held back a sob as she shut her eyes. Hurt coursed through every vein in her body. Like poison, it corrupted her, it numbed her hands and her legs and her fingers and her mind.

She denied it for the longest time.

She fooled herself into thinking that she was happy.

She convinced herself that she was living her dream life.

Instead, Seraphine spent the last seven months living a lie.

Guess I finally got my wish, she thought.

ALONE proved to be a better name than she'd expected.

I feel bad. These chapters are getting shorter and shorter, but their content isn't getting any less heavy. Anyways, thanks for enjoying. We've got 3 chapters left until this story is finished.

Guest - It's Sera X OC :D

Next Chapter: Literally IDK whenever I feel like posting it (which usually means it'll be in less than a week)