Hello all!

I didn't update last week, I know. I hadn't finished Chapter 39 and I couldn't rationalize posting anyway, especially since I didn't actually finish it until last night.

Just a reminder- we are diverging from canon now. I want y'all to get a move on with this chapter so I'll save the rest of the AN for the bottom.

Thanks to the many of you who reviewed, I adore you all.

Chapter 35

Hermione's heart was pounding as she walked up the front steps of Number 4 Privet Drive. This- this could be dangerous. If Dumbledore didn't like it... She could remember all too well what Severus had shown her in his mind.

The second she saw Harry's face those doubts fled. Grief had taken a toll on him, but there was a new determination to his face. He, at least, was ready to take control of his own destiny.

"I'm ready," he said. "Where's the meeting?"

Hermione smiled sadly at him. "Headquarters," she replied. "Me and Moody touched up the charms on the house the day before yesterday. It should be safe now." As she said it she saw his face tighten again, knowing that soon he would be in the house where every room would be haunted by thoughts of his godfather.

"You own it now, you know," she said quietly. "Sirius left everything to you in his will. Including Headquarters. So if you wanted meetings held somewhere else, we could find somewhere else, Harry."

Harry sighed, running a hand through his hair. "No. It's fine. Are we going?"

"Almost," Hermione answered. She scanned him quickly. He was wearing his school robes, which were much better than his ill fitting Muggle clothes. His hair was sticking up- Hermione knew it was futile, but she tried to pat it down anyway. Harry ducked away. "Hermione!"

"Fine, fine," she sighed. "Make sure that you're respectful. Most of these people are here to follow you and Dumbledore- they won't want to see the two of you arguing. The Headmaster will give in, but want to speak to you privately." And to me. I'm going to be lucky if I'm not cursed.

"I know," said Harry. He sounded just the slightest bit irritated to Hermione.

He didn't understand. She grabbed his chin, forcing him to look down at her. "This is important, Harry. Don't challenge him. You are his protege- under no circumstances should you humiliate him or try to usurp him. Dumbledore doesn't take kindly to it."

Harry frowned at her. "You sound like you're afraid of him, Hermione."

She kept her face still, just looking at him. "You've only seen the good side of Albus Dumbledore," she said finally. "He loves you, in his way. But he has other sides too." Dark sides. Grey sides. She offered her arm to him. "Let's go," she said quietly. "Oh- read this first." She held out a scrap of paper with the flowing script that Dumbledore used.

They arrived on the stoop of the house, just inside the protections. Out of the corner of her eye she could see two men leaning against the sign post that read "Grimmauld Place."

"Let's get inside the house," Hermione murmured. "Now."

Harry knocked softly, and the door was opened by Remus. The werewolf was looking the worse for wear. His hair was showing more grey than brown and his skin was more lined than smooth. The creases around his eyes deepened as he considered Harry.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, confused. "Come in, come in. Hermione, why did you bring him?"

Hermione put a hand on Remus' arm. "It's time," she said simply. "Time for Harry to take his place in the Order." I have decided, Remus. My will be done, not Dumbledore's.

Remus frowned. "Does Dumbledore know? He was asking Severus why you were late."

Hermione gave him a brittle smile. "Yes. Let us in, Remus."

Still frowning, Remus stepped aside to allow them into the house. "Are you sure-"

"Yes," Hermione said quickly. "Thank you, Remus. Let's join the meeting."

Her heart was pounding. She could feel the beat in her throat. Reaching behind her, Hermione grabbed Harry's hand, giving it a quick squeeze. He responded, but gave her confused look when she chanced a glance over her shoulder. She tried for a reassuring smile, not quite certain if she managed.

No- she needed confidence right now. Pausing outside the door to the kitchen, Hermione stilled herself, sinking into her mind. She imagined herself how others saw her- brilliant, talented. How Severus saw her- glorious. A fighter, the lethal fey she had seen in his mind. She drew upon that strength, reminding herself how her face looked without a Glamour. Old. She could be listened would be listened to.

Hermione squared her shoulders and opened the door, dropping Harry's hand. The Inner Circle of the Order looked up at her, the surprise in their faces turning into outright shock as Harry followed her into the room.

While they were all looking at Harry, two people were looking at her: Severus and Albus Dumbledore. There was no expression on Severus' face, and a quiet fury burning behind Dumbledore's spectacles.

"I've brought Harry, as you asked, Albus," Hermione declared with false confidence. Her voice rang in the room, silencing the whispers. "To take his proper place in the Order."

She nudged Harry. "Yes, sir," Harry said, voice strong. "I'm glad we've both agreed it's time."

Severus leaned forward, looking Harry up and down. "Interesting, Albus," he drawled. "I told you he's too young, but as always, you know best." There was a hint of a mocking tone in Severus' voice. "It took him leading a suicide mission into the bowels of the Ministry, but at last, it seems you've decided Potter's mature enough to be included in our planning."

Dumbledore looked at Severus, the realization that he was in on Hermione's machinations coming to his face in a moment before fading away. He was trapped, and he knew it.

"It is time for you to be inducted, Harry," he said, voice grave. "I asked Hermione to bring you tonight for the induction ceremony- although I had thought you would have seen fit to be on time." He had a chuckle in his voice, and to all appearances was completely benign now.

It terrified Hermione, how he could go from being deathly angry to being jovial and kindly. "My apologies, Albus. We were held up by Harry's relatives."

The Headmaster nodded and gestured to the empty seat near Severus where Hermione normally sat. "No worries, my dear girl. We'll have a word about how to deal with Petunia and her ilk after the meeting. She can be difficult." His eyes met Hermione's, and for a moment they were pure ice. "Harry, please come forward."

Hermione sunk into her seat, feeling her knees go weak with fear and relief. Harry would take his place in the Order- they could keep things from him no longer. But at the same time- the prospect of the meeting ending filled her with fear.

"Who sponsors Harry James Potter to join the Inner Circle of the Order of the Phoenix?" asked Dumbledore, looking out into the small crowd gathered around the table.

"I do," Remus said immediately. He stood, walking to Harry's side and putting a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Hermione took a shaky breath and stood again, walking over to Harry. "I do," she said, looking directly at Dumbledore.

They needed one more- it was evident that the entire Order would be willing to volunteer, but they seemed to be waiting to see who deserved it the most, in a sense. Who personally knew Harry, rather than just knowing of him. Mr. Weasley stood, pushing his glasses up with one thick finger. "I do," he said mildly.

"We have three sponsors, as required," said Dumbledore. "Remus Lupin, how do you vouch for Harry James Potter?"

Remus smiled down at Harry. "I've known Harry since the day he was born- Lily even let me hold him before Sirius did," he said fondly. "I was one of his father's best friends, and I was Harry's Defense Professor at Hogwarts almost three years ago. He is brave, he is kind, he is intelligent. He is caring. And he is the reason we are all here."

"Hermione Jane Granger, how do you vouch for Harry James Potter?" Dumbledore asked.

Hermione grinned up at Harry, who had only recently begun to tower over her. "He rescued me from a troll in our first year at Hogwarts," she began. "And since then we've been friends. Best friends, us and Ronald Weasley. When I was thirteen I decided that I was willing to risk my life to save him, just as he had been willing to risk his to save mine. I've guarded him, fought beside him, and argued with him; I've made him do his homework, eat his vegetables, and teased him about girls. But in the midst of all the normalcy, Harry is undeniably the only hope we have of defeating the Dark Lord. He needs to know what we are doing, how we are fighting."

Dumbledore nodded, waiting for the small crowd to quiet. Hermione was just glad her voice hadn't shaken. "And Arthur Charles Weasley, how do you vouch for Harry James Potter?"

"Harry has been Ron's best friend since their first trip on the Hogwarts Express," Arthur said quietly. Hermione had to strain to hear him. "And over the years he's dragged our son into some wild adventures, but always with a good heart. He is a leader, and he is, like Hermione said, our only chance at winning this war. He beat You-Know-Who the first time, and I think that he can do it again if we give him all of our resources. We formed the Order of the Phoenix to defeat Voldemort in the first war, and we didn't do that, Harry did. Now we need to help him do it again. I know he has a good head on his shoulders and a good heart in his chest."

"Thank you, sponsors," Dumbledore intoned. "Now. Harry James Potter, do you wish to join the Order of the Phoenix?"

"I do," Harry said, green eyes fierce in his face.

"Are you committed to the fight against the Dark Wizard who calls himself Lord Voldemort?" asked Dumbledore.

"I am," Harry replied.

"Are you willing to do anything and everything necessary to bring him down?"

Harry nodded. "I am."

"And are you willing to keep all the secrets of this organization and guard them against those who seek to aid Lord Voldemort?"

"I am," said Harry firmly.

Dumbledore smiled at him. "You have promised such thrice, under your own free will. Let your words bind you and return thrice upon you if you break your promise. Thus, you are welcomed into the Inner Circle of the Order of the Phoenix. Please be seated, Harry." The Order burst into applause. Several members slapped Harry on the back or shook his hand, welcoming him heartily.

The Order's public show of acceptance into their ranks made Hermione's breathing come easier. Dumbledore would see how popular the idea was, how vital it was that Harry join. If it had been put off much longer these people would have been wondering why not, and why Dumbledore was refusing to tell him anything.

A chair was pulled up for him on Hermione's left, and slightly flushed (with embarrassment or happiness, Hermione did not know) Harry dropped into his seat.

"And now to normal business," the Headmaster said genially. "I believe that Hestia was just finishing her report?"

"I was all done, Albus," Hestia Jones said happily. "That was all."

The meeting may have dragged to some, but to Hermione the next three long-winded reports sped by until it was her turn to speak.

She stood, handing out a packet of reports to be passed around the table. When everyone had one, she spoke. "As you can see from the reports, our spies have information from every nook and cranny of our country. The general public is scared, the Aurors are scared, the Ministry is scared. Gringotts is arming itself. The number of families applying for travel visas is alarmingly high. The most concerning thing about that is that Muggleborns and their families are either being denied visas or they are never getting a response, through both Muggle and Wizarding means."

"Which means that there is someone in power in the Immigrations department who is either a Death Eater or sympathetic to the cause," Severus drawled. "Whether that sympathy is his own or the result of an Unforgivable doesn't really matter."

"Exactly," Hermione said, nodding. "And that person is Alexander Collins."

Dumbledore frowned. "He was a Ravenclaw... Prefect, but not Head Boy. He always was bitter about that, but the professors all agreed he was not the best candidate. How exactly did you come by this information, Hermione?"

Strange. He had never asked her before... "A combination of information from my sources and some digging into the Ministry records," she replied slowly. "I'm quite sure it is him."

Severus nodded. "I agree. Arthur?"

"He does seem like the type," said Arthur Weasley, tapping his fingertips on the table. "He's tried to shut down my department more than once. He just took the Department Head position."

She continued with her report, citing the rise in violence against Muggles, the rumors surrounding Dementors leaving Azkaban, and the reactions of the Pureblood circles. Everyone was listening, and several people took notes. Hermione finished with asking specific people to send their reports to her before the middle of the next week, so she could factor their information into her analysis.

As she sat down, Harry was looking up at her with something like awe. "How do you know all of that?" he whispered.

"I'm like the assistant spymaster," Hermione whispered back. "It's Severus' job to collect information from all the spies, which I sometimes help with, but it's my job to organize and analyze it all."

They turned their attention back to the meeting. There was one last report on Swedish sympathies and then it was time for the meeting to close.

Usually the end of an Inner Circle meeting was slow as members congregated in the halls to gossip and laugh. Tonight there was much of the same, with many of the members standing at the close of the meeting but staying in the kitchen to chatter.

Hermione and Severus stayed where they were as Harry went to talk with Remus. Hermione breathed in and out slowly, wishing for ways to forestall her inevitable meeting with Dumbledore. Severus noticed- he always noticed.

"I saw some trash on the stoop," he murmured, bending so that only she would even have a chance of hearing. "If you would be so kind as to help me take it out?"

The men on the corner. "I would love to," Hermione said, a smile of relief on her face. "I can ask Remus to take Harry back to his aunt's home."

She drifted over to where Harry was talking with Remus and Cedric Diggory. "Hello, boys," she said. "Remus, could you do me a large favor and take Harry back home?"

Remus looked between Hermione and Dumbledore. "He didn't really know, did he?" the werewolf asked quietly.

Hermione gave him a bland smile. "I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about, Remus," she said cheerily. "Can you take Harry?"

"Yes, of course," Remus said, a furrow appearing in his brow. "Let me know when you get home safe, please, Hermione."

It seemed that Remus, at least, might have been somewhat aware of what Dumbledore was capable of. Hermione swallowed hard. "Nonsense. Of course I'll be checking in on you to make sure Harry is safe. Harry, I'll be preparing reports for you to read to help you catch up with Order business so far. No talking to Ron, understand? This is secret, now."

Harry nodded. "Yeah, 'course, Hermione. Will you deliver them or send them by owl?"

"Hand delivered, just for you," she said with a genuine smile. "I'll see you sometime this week." She hugged him and Remus, nodded to Cedric, and went to join Severus in the hall.

As she made her way through the crowd of people, she didn't notice Cedric bid goodnight to Remus and Harry. Just as she turned the corner, he began to follow her, making his way through the crowd.

Hermione slipped around the corner, almost bumping into the tall figure that was waiting for her. She didn't greet him with a smile- she would fake cheeriness for Harry but there was no need to do so with Severus. They were far past that point- they had been for a long time.

"Do you have your knives?" Severus asked in a soft voice. "We shouldn't need to use them, but..."

She bared her teeth. "I'm in a bad mood tonight," she said. "What are we doing with them?" Part of her felt bad for so cavalierly talking about disposing of two people, but they were Death Eaters. And now they were Death Eaters who had seen a suspicious number of people loyal to the light disappearing into... somewhere. They needed to be quieted.

"Let's give them a chance," Severus drawled. "What will they do when they see a young lady walking alone, down their way? If they do nothing, they're completely innocent."

"And if they attack, we know they're definitely Death Eaters," Hermione said, smirking. "And they provoked us, not the other way around."

"Disarm them, look at their memories, and if they are dangerous they mysteriously disappear. Politically correct is the way to be," Severus said smoothly. "And speaking of."

Dumbledore swept toward them, anger now evident in his face. "My office, now," he snapped at Hermione. "We have matters to discuss."

"After I help Severus with the spies waiting for us outside," Hermione said rapidly. "We'll take care of them and then I'll come."

Dumbledore looked at Severus for a long moment, then back at Hermione. "Very well." He swept out the door. A moment later, the couple could hear the pop of Disapparation.

Hermione and Severus looked at each other, holding the other's eyes with their own.

"You did a dangerous thing tonight, Hermione," Severus said in a low voice. There was a strain on his normally dulcet tones, a strain that told her he was worried.

She managed a weak grin. "I told you. I live for danger."

Severus shook his head. "Let's go."

He opened the door, gesturing for her to go first. She gave him a sickly sweet smile and left. The men were still there- three men. She walked toward them as if she hadn't seen them, wand feeling alive in her hands. She could feel Severus' eyes on her back, and his disguised form walking right behind her.

When the men came into her view Hermione found that she recognized one of them- he had been in the graveyard, but the not the Ministry. She gave the three men a cruel smile- one gasped once he recognized her.

"It's the fucking Mudblood," one hissed.

Hermione frowned at him. "Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" she asked. "What are three nice lads like you doing in such a bad part of town?"

She bared her teeth and brought her wand up, casting a silent shield that sparked when the first spell hit it. "That wasn't very nice," she taunted. "If you're going to curse me, at least be more creative... or more accurate."

When they were paying attention to her, Severus Stunned two of them neatly and Hermione took care of the third herself. They bound them with ropes and levitated them into an alley.

"Do you want to do the interrogation or shall I?" Severus asked.

She grinned at him. "I'll take a crack at one of them, at least, if you don't mind. Anything I should be looking for in particular?"

Hermione jotted down the last pieces of information in the small notebook she carried with her, and rose from her crouch, stretching to ease the cricks in her back.

"That's it then," she said mournfully. "What should we do with them?" As much as she enjoyed gathering information, she didn't exactly want to kill them. But she knew it as well as she knew her own name- something had to be done with these men. They couldn't go back to their lord- and there hadn't really been a choice about approaching them in the first place. There were too many Death Eaters already; if they could get rid of a few and get information at the same time both Severus and Hermione knew that they could not pass up the opportunity.

Still. It was dirty work, work that made Hermione feel like taking a long hot shower.

Severus glanced at her. "I hope you aren't getting scruples now," he said, a hint of a warning in his voice.

Hermione sighed, wrapping her arms around herself in the slight, unnatural chill of the summer's night. "I know. I just get the feeling that we're as bad as they are if we just... murder them outright. Can't we Transfigure them into rats or something?"

"We can use an exorbitant amount of magical power to do so," Severus allowed, slight sarcasm dripping into his voice. "So they can die in a few hours or a few weeks in some kind of gruesome death at the hands of a cat or the elements. Or three drops of a tasteless painless potion can be used and their bodies Transfigured with considerably less power into something nondescript." She could hear the recrimination in his voice- he was mocking her 'tender feelings' and was quite probably hurt at the thought that she considered him 'as bad as' them.

"What would the public say if stuff like this came out after the war?" Hermione said quietly, meeting his eyes. "I'm sure that after the Dark Lord is gone they'll be happy for a week or so but then they'll start looking at people like you and me."

"What do you mean, people like you and me?" Severus snapped. She could see the vein in his neck- he was growing annoyed and quickly.

Hermione raised an eyebrow. "A Muggleborn who illegally used a Time Turner and a former Death Eater. Harry will be in the clear- Ron, Luna, all the purebloods. But think of the political reaction if they found out that Harry Potter's best Muggleborn friend killed purebloods- albeit Death Eaters- in cold blood during the war? Or if they ask you on trial if you ever killed in cold blood?"

"I have killed in cold blood, Hermione," Severus said, his irritation more pronounced. His voice was more like a hiss that his normal smooth tone. "But if you would like to save your precious reputation go ahead and run to Dumbledore now. I'll take care of the trash."

Frustrated, Hermione pushed her curly hair out of her face. "That's not what I meant, Severus," she said. "I'm just saying we need to think about these things."

"You need to think about these things," countered Severus. "Have you ever considered why the Headmaster didn't throw a fuss about us doing this, even though he knew full well what we were planning? He's not exactly counting on me making it through the war- probably you too, now, because of the stunt you pulled tonight. If he did care, he would have made you come with him immediately. He's letting you do this so you can fashion yourself a lovely noose should you make it out on the other side." The words were nasty and said with plenty of vitriol. There was a burning at the back of her throat and a pressure behind her eyes that told Hermione it was very likely that she might cry- she pushed those feelings back with a few deep breaths.

"Fine, then," she said, as calmly as she could. "Poison it is."

"Fine," snarled Severus. He stalked to each victim, opening their mouths and letting three drops fall into each mouth. As soon as he was done with one body, she quickly Transfigured it into a bone, letting the complicated magic calm her.

Looked at objectively, Hermione could see the situation from both angles. It didn't mean she had to like it- but it did mean that she couldn't continue being furious. She was too rational for that.

"You take them somewhere," she told Severus, the ire gone from her voice. "I've got a reaming to get to."

He noticed- of course he noticed- that she had calmed some.

"I'll visit afterward," he said shortly. She knew what he meant- they would talk about it later which was a kind of apology from him.

She nodded, and was about to Apparate when his hand darted out and stilled her. "Wait," he said, urgency in every line of his body. "I have something for you."

He fumbled in his potions kit, which worried Hermione. Even in times of greatest stress his hands were always steady. Severus found what he was looking for, a small flask filled halfway with a smoky grey liquid.

"Drink this," he ordered, handing it to her. "Right before you enter his office."

She nodded, folding her hand around it. "What will it do?"

"It will make any memory charms he works on you temporary," said Severus, his eyes dark and terrible. "So you remember."

The fear that constricted her lungs was immediate and left her breathless for an agonizing moment. "Thank you."

He nodded, arms full of bones, and Apparated away.

The potion tasted of air, as if she had swallowed a mouthful of fog. It slid down her throat, heavy, leaving a metallic aftertaste in her mouth and throat.

When she reached the top of the stair, she didn't knock, and he didn't call out his normal bid to enter. Rather, Hermione waited a ways away and the door to the Headmaster's office flung open with a fury.

Hermione didn't wince. She had spent the trip up the slow moving stairs tucking her fear and worry away into the deepest recesses of her mind, pushing them away, calming her heartbeats. There was a trick to it, listening to one's heart and telling it to quiet at the same time.

Walking into Albus Dumbledore's office felt at once strange and normal. She had done a hundred times before and yet- before there had always been a great and kind leader behind the desk, a bit odd, yes, but kind.

And now the old man behind the desk was looking at her very differently. He didn't look old and kindly- behind the glint of his spectacles were cold blue eyes, and his mouth was drawn tight in anger. As she sat down, the door slammed shut.

She was not offered a lemon drop.

"You do not understand what you have done," Dumbledore began. His words were clipped, as if it was taking a great effort to say and not to shout them.

"I made sure that the boy who you are expecting to save us all has the information he needs to make informed decisions," Hermione said calmly, looking at a point slightly to the right of Dumbledore's head to avoid looking at his terribly angry eyes. "What, exactly, is so terribly about that?" I've messed up his greater plan in some way, she thought. At once two warring emotions rose within her- fear that she had messed everything up for everyone relying on Harry and the Order conflicting with anger at Dumbledore for keeping his cards so close to his chest.

"I had my reasons for keeping Harry in the dark!" shouted Dumbledore, standing suddenly. He was always tall and his robes made him imposing. By standing and leaning over his desk he towered over her, and like a child she wished she could cower into her chair.

Hermione stood too, crossing her arms over her chest. "Why would you want to keep him blind? He's going to be fighting this war for us! He might die! He needs-"

"Lord Voldemort can see inside his mind!" Dumbledore snapped. "If Harry knows our secrets, then Lord Voldemort does as well!"

That wasn't right. "No," Hermione said calmly. "You saw what happened when the Dark Lord tried to get inside of Harry's mind, it hurt him too much! You said as much to Harry himself, before you sent him home. He told me- he told me all of it. How "either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives. If you told him the prophecy, then you're not afraid of him getting into Harry's mind. It has to be something else. What don't you want him to know?"

"It is not your concern!" He looked truly fierce now, but Hermione knew that there was something he was hiding.

Hermione shook her head, stepping back. "No. I have to keep him alive. If there is something that could harm him, I need to know. I can't let him die, Albus, just because you want to be the only one who knows everything! I won't let him die!" Now she was shouting, but Hermione didn't care.

"He is going to die!" roared Dumbledore. "He has to die!" He was breathing hard, but the look on his face told Hermione that it wasn't information spilled in the heat of the moment, no, he had been meaning to tell her this all along.

There was a dropping sensation deep in her chest, like her heart was falling, tumbling, through the ground and into the earth.

"No," she whispered, dropping back into her chair. "He can't."

Dumbledore returned to his seat. "Have you heard of Horcruxes?"

A Horcrux is the darkest kind of black magic, created through the darkest of rituals...

A murder in cold blood, after a ceremony using the blood of an infant and a sacrifice of great importance...

The soul is severed and a portion stored inside an object- or rather, it embodies the object, infuses it, becomes a part of it. For this reason living creatures are not used, for they have a soul of their own...

The severed soul maintains a link to the whole, but exists as a whole itself, although halving a soul halves humanity at the same time...

Therefore the Horcrux acts as a second soul, a chance for life after death.. But without a body the soul is anchorless and must possess another form...

"Yes," Hermione breathed. Oh god. Harry- Harry is a horcrux.

He could see the realization in her eyes, in the way she folded over in her chair, the way her breath was coming quickly. Now he knew he had to be caring, to be gentle. The anger flowed from him, and before she could blink he was staring at her with wisdom and sorrow.

"Godric's Hollow, two murders. Tom liked to make Horcruxes out of significant murders- and what would be more significant than obliterating a prophecy? Except it backfired and his body was separated from his soul... a portion of which went into the scar on Harry's forehead, creating a Horcrux. One of several that I think Tom Riddle has created." When she looked up at him, he seemed hopeless. "He must die before Lord Voldemort may truly be gone."

"But how?" It didn't make sense, none of it made sense. "If he has to die before the Dark Lord can die, how can he kill him?"

Dumbledore sighed, seeming to deflate before her. "I do not know, my dear girl," he said wearily. "I do not know."

I know, Hermione thought, burying her head in her hands so that he would not see her face. I know. Harry sacrifices himself or dies tragically at the hands of Lord Voldemort- and then you step in and save the day, you or whomever you believe to be perfectly controllable. A protege, whom you can guide to follow in your footsteps, or the next Minister of Magic or Headmaster of Hogwarts. Either way... Harry is out of the picture and you are the hero.

"No." She raised her head, letting her tears, her real tears, fall down her face. "No. You've had me protect him all these years, protect him so that he can die at the right time?"

Hermione covered her face again as he talked. "My suspicions about the Horcruxes were only recently confirmed. I thought, after what had happened to poor Quirinus Quirrell that he might have made one... and then the diary that Harry destroyed with the basilisk fang. When the two of you reported to me after the graveyard about how he had gone farther than anyone had gone ever before on the path to immortality.. And more recently... I think I may have located another."

He's known. He knew when he was asking me to protect Harry, he knew when we stumbled out of that graveyard bleeding and broken and when we went to the Ministry.

She felt sick.

"You have to tell Harry." Hermione said, still crying. "You have to tell him. You can't keep him in the dark anymore, you can't-"

Dumbledore was shaking his head. "His mind is not safe," he said solemnly. "The Horcrux in his scar allows Voldemort to flit into his mind and leave it again, knowing what he knows. That is why I've avoided him all year."

"But when Voldemort tried to possess him it burned him," Hermione protested, mind scrambling in every direction. "We can teach him Occlumency, I'll work with him all summer if we need to. He needs to know, though, we can't just keep it from him."

Dumbledore's eyes flashed. "You must not be difficult about this, Hermione Granger," he warned. She couldn't see his hands, she didn't know if he had picked up his wand. "I am making this decision in his best interests-"

"If you don't tell him I'll tell him myself," Hermione said flatly. His eyes met hers, but he didn't attempt to penetrate her mind.

I can stop you, he was telling her.

No, you can't, she was replying.

Finally, he relented. "Your dedication to the boy is admirable, my dear," he said, looking away. "Although not in his best interests-"

"You keep saying it's in his better interests but I fail to see how being dead is in anyone's best interests," Hermione said coldly. "Tell him. Tell the Order, let them look for ways around it. He doesn't have to die! We can figure something out, there has to be a spell or a ritual-"

"No." Dumbledore's voice was harsh, final. "The Order cannot know. He is their only hope. Without him, they would fall into despair. The only people who can know this are you, me, and Severus."

She saw her chance and she took it. "Tell Harry about the Horcruxes and I won't tell the Order," she said quickly. "That is the most logical thing to do. If he know about them he can help destroy them- how many are there?"

"I think that Voldemort meant to create six, so that he would have a soul in seven pieces," Dumbledore said quietly. "One is destroyed already- the diary. We can discuss the others at a later time. There is a process to it, you see. I will need to show you-"

"And Harry," Hermione interjected.

Dumbledore was quiet for a long moment. "I will need to show you and Harry how I discovered what I know," he said at last. "But Harry cannot know until it is time. He will make the choice, after all- we will need to prepare him before we can reveal it. For him to knowingly go to his death, to make a noble sacrifice... he must be properly prepared."

He was waiting for her to nod. Woodenly, she did so. "I have plenty to think about, my dear girl. You are dismissed from now. Discuss this with no one but Severus. I'll have your word as a witch that you will not tell Harry until I give you direct permission."

"My word," Hermione said in agreement, standing to leave. She brushed the remains of the tear tracks from her face, trying to regain some composure. Dumbledore held out a hand, stopping her.

"One last thing, my dear," he said kindly, his tone of voice belaying the coldness that had returned to his face. Now his hands were above the wood of the desk, innocuously waving his wand in a gentle pattern that produced red and gold sparks. "If you ever spring something like tonight upon me ever again..." He flicked his wand up and the red and gold sparks turned black, like ashes, and fell to his desk. "You will not like the results."

Hermione understood the message.

"Yes, sir," she said quietly, and left.

It wasn't until she had returned to the safe house that Hermione realized that she hadn't seen Fawkes in the Headmaster's office.

Severus knew that something was wrong the moment he saw Hermione. Her eyes were large and dark in her face, which was pale under her developing summer tan. When their eyes met, she shook her head, lips pressed firmly together.

She had messaged him as he had waited in the Safe House for her to return, his watch heating with a slight burn. Meet me at my old house.

The ruins of the house they had set flame to were no longer really there. The Hermione was waiting on the sidewalk, her hair being flung about by the slight breeze. As soon as he appeared, she started walking away, knowing that he would follow.

His legs were longer than hers, his strides wider. He caught up to her before she turned the corner, but stayed silent. There was a park in the distance which he assumed Hermione was leading him to, where the moon was shining off the metal of the swing set and the dull plastic of the slide set.

Severus was slightly surprised when she led him through the park, to the benches where parents could sit to watch their children play and farther, until she sat down on a bench that was half-hidden under the long tendrils of a willow tree. He sat at her side, patient, waiting.

"I thought it was only going to be a scolding," Hermione finally said. Her legs were drawn up, and she clutching her knees as she stared at the playground.

Severus frowned. "What did he do?" Remove her from the Order? Remove her from Harry's protection? Try to Oblivate her?

"He said the one thing that he knew would make me-" she stopped, drawing in a shuddering breath. "Have you heard of Horcruxes?"

Even the name held an awful kind of dark magic, the kind that whispered in the mind of an experienced Dark Arts practitioner and told him yes this is your kind of magic the darkest the most secret research try this was made just for you. "Yes," Severus said shortly. What one earth is this about?

"Tom Riddle's diary, in our second year," Hermione said, her voice soft. "Remember, we talked about it. How strange, that an enchanted object could hold so much of a person. How it could try to suck the soul out of a girl. How it could take corporeal form, how it could weld magic. We didn't look into it enough, Severus, but Dumbledore did."

Realization didn't crash into Severus, it slotted neatly into place as several facts and hours of speculation finished a puzzle that had been bothering him for more than decade. "The Dark Lord made a Horcrux."

"He made more than one," responded Hermione hollowly."Dumbledore thinks that he created several."

Severus nodded slowly, thinking it through. "Probably a magical number- three or seven. Everyone else has only ever created one, I'd think that he'd want to outdo them."

"Horcruxes are made with murder," Hermione said, turning so that she was looking at him. "The Killing Curse that was supposed to kill Harry rebounded somehow and turned on the Dark Lord and somehow a piece of his soul ended up in Harry Potter's fucking forehead!" She buried her head in her arms, trying to hide her tears from him.

That's why he went from a handsome man to the snake like creature he is now.

That's why he tortured Lucius over the diary.

That's how he possessed Quirrell.

That's why Potter can see what he's doing.

That's how he possessed Potter.

It all makes sense.

But under the triumph of knowledge, Severus could feel the slow build of anger.

"How long has he suspected?" he asked woodenly.

Hermione's shoulders were shaking, and he heard a muffled "Years," from her.

"And he's had us protect him, to keep him 'safe' until..." he let his voice trail off.

"Until he dies," said Hermione, raising her head to look directly at him. Tears were falling down her face, and her eyes were red and puffy. "Like a pig to slaughter." She laughed bitterly. "Everything he's done- look at it all! He didn't train Harry like he decided to train me because Harry has to be able to die- or go docilely to his death! He went to the Dursleys, to those awful people, and Dumbledore didn't do a fucking thing when his room was the cupboard under the stairs and they would starve him for days, because he needed a boy hero who was selfless... it's all making sense, Severus, everything is making sense."

He reached over, taking her by the waist and pulling her toward him. Hermione turned her head to his shoulder, muffling her sobs in his robes. Severus just held, her, turning over the new information in his mind.

Years ago he had promised to protect the boy as atonement for Lily's death, the death he had caused. The boy was the only one who could defeat the Dark Lord, but above that he was Lily's son. Lily, whom he had terribly wronged. By protecting her son he could make up for some of his sins, he could, perhaps, turn to the light again.

But no. Lily's son might not even live to see adulthood, if it was true that he harbored a piece of the Dark Lord's soul inside his scar.

They sat in the silence of the park. Fireflies darted around them, crickets chirped, and the swings made a creaking noise as the wind pushed the rusty chains as the woman he loved fell apart in his arms.

So ends Chapter 35.

Yep. Diverging. Bet you didn't expect that to come so quickly, did you? Well, Horcruxes are here and now and we are dealing with them here and now.

Other things to address:

IB! I got my IB scores! 7's in English, Math, and Psych and 6's in French, History, and Physics. 41/45 total for my diploma. I broke my school's record, which I am pleased with. I feel this proves you can have a part time job and do IB at the same time.

And thanks for all the roommate advice. She seems pretty cool- I like her so far. We actually live closer to each other than we do to the university, which is funny. We've been emailing and chatting and I'm excited! But I also need dorm bedding and I don't know where to get it where it'll be good quality and not super expensive.

My holiday in France is over, and I'm back in the US and back to work. My flights were terrible again- canceled and moved around and delayed. Ugh. I'll be moving though, in a few weeks, so that update might come at an odd time/not exactly on the projected date.

Excerpt:

"Come back to bed," Hermione suggested, moving over to make room for him. "It's barely morning."

Next update should be on August 22, if I finish Chapter 40. I'm 3,000 words into it though, so it's looking good. (As much as I appreciated all of the messages I got asking if I was okay, I don't want to freak anyone out again.)

And: I have a beta! She's getting to work, and I might be updating some chapters as she goes through them. She's mainly doing it for Ashwinder, where I'm quite behind on posting, so it'll be a while before she works on these.

Also: I'm turning 18 in a few days, so I'll finally be an adult. Weird, no? I started writing this story such a long time ago and now I'm at this point.

See you in two weeks! (If everything goes right.) Please Review!