A/N: Finally! I feel so accomplished, posting a long chapter again! The Quest begins! Sort of. The next chapter will be the conversation with Phet, and then chapter 11 will be the Beginning! I'll try to get that far before I leave for camp next Friday, because I'll be gone for a week with no Internet. How will I survive?! Or would you rather I wait to post the Beginning until I get back? Review to tell me! If you can't tell, the italicized part is word for word out of Tiger's Voyage(That took forever to type out...) Long live Colleen Houck! R&R!

After an hour and a half of tramping through the jungle we finally stop for a break. Kishan leans against a tree and continues his apparent pact of silence toward us as Ren removes the swaddling device from me and straps it onto himself.

Once I am freed from the heavy device, I walk slowly over to Kishan.

I place my hand on his bicep and he pulls away.

"Kishan," I say softly. "What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it. It's not important anyway," He says sullenly.

I sigh, wondering when he became like this.

"Kishan, I know that's not true. Now tell me, otherwise I'll sic Ren on you, and you won't know what hit you," I say forcefully.

Kishan exhales through his lips, making a noise like a horse.

"Fine. I'm jealous. I didn't mean to be, and I always thought that I was happy with the life I had on Mount Kailash with Mika and the kids, but now I'm not. I wish that my kids stayed babies for months, not days. I wish that I had the joy of hearing my child's first laugh and anticipating that moment for longer than twelve hours. I am very, very, very, jealous of you and Ren. Happy?" Kishan vents.

"Yes, I am, actually. I thought it might be something serious," I say harshly. "I'm sorry that you aren't happy with the life you chose. I'm sorry that you are jealous of your family's happiness, which should be yours as well. I'm sorry that your goddess wife and fifty-four children aren't enough for you. I'm sorry that every day I miss my baby that was never born, I will have you to think of, because you weren't happy with your immortal life," I snarl. "But, Sohan Kishan Rajaram, if you think for even a second that every person who knows you wouldn't rather you be here than there, I will personally relive every moment of depression I've had since you left. Because you left," I say even more harshly.

Kishan looks horrified. I know if I turn around, Ren will have a very similar look on his face, but I need to snap Kishan out of this.

"But, Kishan, that doesn't matter. I am going to pretend that you never left, and since you don't remember anything that will be of use to us for this quest, I suggest you do the same." At Kishan's terrified face, my tone softens. "Kishan, we need to be able to talk to each other. Even if you can't pull it together for yourself, think of Nik. If we aren't all at the best we can be, he might be welcoming home one less person than he said goodbye to."

Kishan nods slowly. "Kells, that was really mean, but I needed to hear it. I'm sorry for-"

"Stop," I say, holding my hand up. "I know. It wasn't your fault; I just wanted you to get out of it. I know that it hurts, but we can deal with it later, okay? Maybe Phet can help," I tell him, and embrace him tightly at the same time. "Really. I just want you to be happy."

"Could've fooled me," Ren says grumpily from behind me.

I glare at him. "Doing the right thing for someone you love doesn't always mean being nice, you know."

"Yes, I do," Ren frowns. "Are you still holding that against me?"

I whirl around in surprise. "What?" I gasp. Then I remember.

Even after all these years. After a wedding, two children, though one we will…never know, and spending three years together, those memories still haunt me.

"I want us to break up."

My jaw dropped. "You what?"

"I don't want us to be together anymore."

I couldn't think of anything to say except, "Why?"

"I can't… it won't… we shouldn't… look, I have my reasons, okay?"

"No. Just saying you have reasons isn't good enough."

Something flickered in his eyes. Pain. But it disappeared quickly and was replaced by gritty fortitude. "I don't love you anymore."

"I don't believe you. You'll have to do better than that. I read your wishes at the Star Festival. Remember?"

He grimaced. "I forgot. But you should believe me anyway. It'll be easier for us both that way. Kishan has feelings for you, and it would be better if you were with him."

"You can't tell me who to love and who not to love."

"You already love him."

"I love you, you big idiot."

"Then stop."

"I can't just turn my feelings on and off like a water spigot"

"That's why I won't be around anymore. I'll avoid being near you. You'll never be near me."

"Oh, I see. You think that not seeing you will fix everything?"

"Probably not. But it will help."

I folded me arms and looked at him with utter incredulity. "I can't believe you are telling me to be with your brother. It's really not like you. Please tell me what I did to cause this."

"You didn't do anything."

Ren spun around, leaned over, and placed his elbows on the railing. He didn't say anything for a minute so I walked over near him and leaned over too. Eventually, he said quietly, "I couldn't save you."

"What do you mean?"

"I couldn't. I tried to do CPR, but I became violently ill. I couldn't save you. Kishan had to intervene, and in my jealously and frustration I pushed him away. I almost let you die because I didn't want him to touch you. That's when I realized I had to let you go."

"But, Ren-"

I reached out to touch his arm. Ren look down at my hand and stepped away.

I stiffened and said, "I'm sure your exaggerating."

"No, I'm not." He turned away from me as if he was going to leave.

"Alagan Dhiren Rajaram, you stay right here, and you listen to me!"

He spun back to me, angry.

"No. Kelsey. No! I can't be with you! I can't touch you. And I can't save you." He gripped the railing so hard his knuckles turned white. "You need a man who can do those things. That man isn't me. It's been months, Kelsey. I haven't found the trigger. I probably never will, and you'll waste your entire life waiting for me! Kishan needs you. Kishan wants you. Be with him."

"I don't want to. I choose you, and I don't care about those other things. I'm sure we'll figure something out. Please don't push me away because of this."

"It's for the best, Kelsey. We know what's best for you."

"No, you don't! You're what's best for me!"

"I'm not. And I'm not discussing this with you anymore. I've made my decision."

"Oh! You've made your decision, have you? Well, this may come as a shock to you, but you don't make decisions for me! The two of you can plan and scheme all you want, but you can't force me to feel differently about you than I do!"

Ren's shoulders fell and he said resignedly, "It won't be force. Your feelings for him will come naturally, and at the same time your feelings for me will diminish."

"Not bloody likely!" I started panicking. Ren was serious. He had never backed off when he set his mind to something before, and I wasn't making any headway at talking him out of this. I began hyperventilating. Tears trickled down my face. "Nothing about this feels natural. I can't believe you're willing to give me away."

"Don't be stubborn about this, Kelsey."

I laughed wetly with sardonic humor. "I don't think I'm the one being stubborn here."

He sighed. "We need to face the fact that our relationship is dysfunctional. Why put us both through the pain when it's not necessary? You can be happy with Kishan and… I'm sure I can find someone else too."

I'm sure he could. All he'd have to do is walk down any street in the world and there would be hundreds of "someone elses" lined up for blocks.

I inhaled shakily. "But there isn't anyone else I want.. I don't want us to break up."

Ren laughed cynically. "I knew you wouldn't listen to reason." He sighed. "Fine. Let's do this the hard way." He squared his shoulders, and his mouth turned up cruelly. "People break up all the time, Kelsey. Just accept it. The fact of the matter is, it was nice for a while, but it's time I moved on. No forgotten memories could possibly be worth all this… pain. All this drama."

"I still don't believe you. I know you still care about me."

"How can I care about a girl when my gut twists in agony every time I touch her?"

"You never complained before."

"You're the only girl I've ever kissed and a kiss that can only last a few seconds just isn't worth it."

"You know what I think? I think you are feeling extremely guilty about the CPR thing, and you're trying to protect me. You've always been overprotective, so now you think breaking up with me will save me. You've got some kind of hyperactive Superman complex, and your favorite pastime is to sacrifice our being together for my safety."

He grunted and ran a hand through his hair. "Apparently I'm not making myself clear. I… don't… want… you. Not anymore. I'm not even sure I want a girlfriend right now. Maybe I'll just play the field for a while, break a few hearts. I think I'll try a redhead. Or a blonde next time."

"I'll believe it when I see it."

"Is that what it will take? You have to see me with another woman before you believe I'm serious?"

I folded my arms. "Yes."

"Fine. I'll be happy to accommodate you."

"Oh… no… you… won't! If I see you with another woman, I will personally strangle you, Tarzan!"

"I don't want to hurt you, Kelsey, but you are forcing me. I'm serious about this. We don't belong together, and until you accept that, you won't see me." Ren turned to leave.

"You coward. Hiding from a girl half your size."

He spun back around. "I'm no coward, Kelsey. You once left me saying that we didn't belong together. That we didn't… match. I've come to believe you're right. You are not for me. I'll find someone else. Someone," he worked his jaw, "prettier. And a little less mouthy would be good too."

I gasped softly as fat, wet teardrops fell to my cheeks.

Seeing me falter, Ren moved in for the kill. "I'm sure we'll both be able to move on quickly. Maybe even within the week."

I turned around to hide my emotional turmoil, still speechless.

"The good news for you is, you already have a backup boyfriend or two. You have it easy. Men seem to flock to you like bears to honey, so count your blessings."

I wrapped my arms around my stomach trying to contain the pain. Sucking in a shaky breath, I asked quietly, "So is that it?" This is goodbye? We won't mean anything to each other anymore? You won't even be my friend?"

"That's right. I'll help on the tasks to break the curse, but other than that, don't expect to see me. And when Durga's tasks are complete, I'll just disappear. You'll never see me again."

He took a few steps away, but stopped when I softly said, "Ren?"

He sighed. "Yes?"

I turned and took a few steps so I could face him. I looked at his handsome face, searching for a sign that he would end this foolishness. His visage was set hard as stone. There would be no changing his mind, no relenting. I tried another tack, and threatened, "If you leave me again… there won't be another chance."

Another fat tear plopped onto my cheek. He took a step closer, reaching out his finger to the teardrop. Our eyes met, and my heart thumped horribly in my chest. I loved him so much it hurt. How could he do this to us? It felt wrong. These words he was saying were false. I knew it in my mind, but my heart was in pain regardless. My Ren would never say these things to me, but was he still my Ren? Had he really changed that much?

Ren studied the teardrop as he rubbed it between his finger and thumb. He looked up, his blue eyes hardened sapphires. "I won't need another chance. I won't be seeking you out again."

A tear slips down my cheek as I realize how perfectly I remember that day. I don't remember every second of our relationship before or after that, though I do remember a lot of it. But I could quote, word for word, what he said to me that day. More tears fall as I think about Ren's ridiculous bid to keep me safe. I turn away from him as I whisper, "No, I'm not. I forgave you the day you asked me to marry you, and I honestly forgot. Just… let me go ahead, okay? Give me Nik," I say, as I reach my arms out for him. I kiss Ren softly, and I can feel his anguish over leaving me so long ago.

"Ren, I'll be okay. Just let me calm down for a few minutes. My emotions are so all over the place, I might still be pregnant," I smile sadly.

Ren tries, really, he does. He smiles, and I can tell that he doesn't want me to see his pain. But I know him too well. I, and maybe Kishan too, am the only one who is able to see the agony in his eyes, behind the crystalline blue of his eyes.

His hand shakes as it lifts mine to his lips, and I smile weakly at the gesture.

"Ren," I say gently. "Look at me."

His sapphire eyes meet my brown ones, and I hold his gaze for a moment before I speak.

"I love you. Forever. Always. Through the centuries."

He smiles, a bit more normally this time.

"As I love you, iadala," he says. He hands me Nik, and does something I never thought he would do, when we aren't fighting. "Go ahead. I'll be a ways behind you; you won't have to worry about any animals attacking you, or Kishan hearing you, since he still has tiger-senses." He let me go.

~TR~

Fifteen minutes later, Nik is cradled to my chest, and my tears are slowly soaking his beautiful brown hair.

"Oh, Nik," I say softly. "This isn't at all what it was like before. I mean, your uncle was still ridiculously blaming himself, but your father would never have let me walk away and not be in his immediate sight.

"I would never have been able to calm either one of them down. Your father would have been much too angry for me to even contemplate trying. Ki-your uncle would never have listened. He would have kept on blaming himself, and wouldn't have calmed down.

"I just…don't understand. Why now? Why me? Why us? Why everything? Why couldn't your dad have just been born now, and gone to my high school, and we could have met then, and then we could live normally, without all this curse-breaking drama, and… all of it," I moan to no one in particular.

"Because you wouldn't be same person, Kahl-see," A voice says from behind me.

"Wha-?" I gasp, wiping the tears from my eyes. "Phet?" I ask in amazement. "I thought we weren't anywhere near your… place…"

He chuckles. "Ah, yes, Kahl-see. I transport my things. I knew you come back, and I knew who come with you," he gestures toward my son as I grin, "so I come closer to main road."

"Thank you, Phet," I smile. "That was a much easier hike than before. Though, I must say, I was looking forward to the waterfall."

"It is not far a journey from new home to waterfall you talk of," Phet says, jumping ahead.

"Wait, Phet, I have a question. If you can appear in any form you want, why are you in this form, instead of rich business owner in Dubai, or something?" I ask curiously.

Phet cackles. "First, Kahl-see, may I?" he asks, gesturing to Nik.

"Oh, of course!" I say quickly, and gently pass Nik to Phet.

"I told you see you in a happier time," he says while clicking his tongue at Anik. "You think I mean with Durga when you fight demon."

I think back to that technically "happier" time, because I was resigned to my fate, and smile. "I'm glad I was wrong. But you didn't answer my question."

"Because, Kahl-see. What I tell you first time we meet is true. I a humble servant of Durga," he grins, with fewer teeth than when I last saw him.

"Okay. I like that, actually. It's nice to know that there aren't only power hungry people in the world."

"Kahl-see, aren't many 'power hungry' people in world. Many good people. Good people not known for special reasons. Maybe not like fame. Maybe not like people with much money, and good people no wanting to be like other people. You not liking having much money, true?"

I ponder Phet's words. "You're right. I know that was not the most pressing issue we have to talk about, and you didn't really have to answer it," I smile. "Thank you."

Phet walk along, still holding my son, and I follow him.

"Phet, how will Ren and Kishan know to not go to where you used to live?" I ask, remembering that they aren't with us.

"I see them first. I tell them direction of my home, and they wait for us," Phet says, rocking Nik gently.

"Oh," I say gratefully. "Thank you."

"Is nothing," Phet says joyfully. "I very happy all of us together again."

"I am too," I say with a grin. "And I am much happier than before. Well… kind of," I say, my elation at finally starting this new quest fading a little at the thought of my lost child.

"I not trying to say it do not matter, Kahl-see, but there are many childs future," Phet says nicely. "I know this." His finger tapping the side of his head makes me laugh, and the fact that he knows about my… miscarriage even though I didn't tell him doesn't even register as we walk into his new home.

~TR~

Kishan and Ren are seated at the table by the stove, and Ren jumps up as soon as the flap to the tent opens.

"Iadala, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to make you sad," he says as he wraps me in his embrace," he says softly. "I shouldn't have let you leave, either."

I laugh. "No, Ren. I'm glad you did. I got to talk to Phet for a bit and hash things out with a nine-month old."

"Speaking of, where is he?" Ren asks, noticing that Nik isn't perched on my hip.

I incline my head over towards Phet and Ren notices the old man cackling at our son's antics.

"So, Phet," I begin to get his attention, pulling out of my husband's arms reluctantly. "What do we need to know?"

"Phet looks up from playing with Anik on the floor with Kishan, and smiles sadly. "Can wait, Kahl-see. Talk now, talk tomorrow, no difference."

I feel confused for a moment, and then I notice the look on Phet's face as he plays with Nik.

"Did you ever have kids, Phet?" I ask as I sit down on the floor and yawning as Ren sits next to me and takes my hand.

"No, Kahl-see. Too busy doing Durga's work, and time-traveling," he jokes.

I suddenly feel exhausted, and Phet notices my drooping eyelids.

Phet hands my son to me, and I automatically coo at him.

"Sleep now, tigers. Sleep, Kahl-see, Durga's chosen one. Put baby tiger to rest, and rise happy in morning."

With that, I stand up slowly, and walk outside to feed Nik, and Ren follows me, lacing his fingers through mine.

"Mujhe tumse pyarhai, iadala," Ren says softly, gazing into my eyes and making me forget that I'm a not particularly beautiful woman who just miscarried this perfect man's second child. I feel like the most gorgeous supermodel on the planet.

"Mujhe tumse pyarhai, Dhiren Rajaram," I say as we lean our foreheads together.