Chapter 43
Angels and Outlaws
Part 7 of 14
Chapter 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, and 43 have been posted. Make sure to read them all. This isn't the end yet. We still have another 6 or 7 chapters to go.
Tension increased the more time Jax spent with us. The kids went on with their lives around him. He moved on with his and hoped someday to be included in theirs. He refused to give the specific omission out loud as he took every opportunity to give it another shot with them. Although, they just kept refusing it. Sometimes as we aged we obtained more compassion and understanding. As our children aged they had less.
Believe it or not, it was Sissy who loved Jax the most. She couldn't wait until she got to see him every morning. Once he got a job at a garage, she missed him being around.
"Will Jax be there when we get home?"
"I don't know, baby."
"Look, Mommy. Jax is here."
He was but he was asleep under the tree. His body propped up on the trunk with his head thrown back snoring. Since Jax started his new job as mechanic, he didn't have a lot of time on his hands.
The daily grind kicked his ass, up early and he worked until late evening. For above a minimal wage job that didn't allow a large cash flow. He had to earn his spot with them and every dime he made. There were no given freebies due to who he was in this new way of life. This was where he joined the rest of the world and just tried to survive.
His sandwich was squished by the grip of his hand. The lunch box was opened beside him, he must not have finished it. A thermos turned over on the ground with the spilled coffee cup he dropped at some point.
"Shhh... Jax is tired." It came of out of my little girl at a whisper. She spread her doll blanket on him once again.
"Let him sleep. Come on, Sissy."
We went in and had our dinner. Alex looked out the window to check on Jax before she went to bed. He was still in the same spot. Out like a light.
What amazed me was the next morning. The doll blanket was folded neatly on the porch. The last time she covered Jax up with it, I had to recover the blanket from the yard where he left it lay and washed it for her.
In some ways we had all made progress. In others, we regressed more often than not. When I seen Kenny leaving with Jax early on a Saturday morning, I started to wonder what progress my son had made. Or just how much he regressed with Jax around.
"Do you know where they are going?"
"Nope." Abel almost always knew where Kenny was. "They have been meeting up almost daily at the tattoo shop."
"What?"
"Kenny hangs out a lot with Jax now." How had I missed it? Had I worked so many hours I wasn't in tuned with my family? Had my son made bad choices I was unaware of?
Kenny followed in Kyle's footsteps. He was a good artist and loved ink. When he turned sixteen I remembered him coming home late one night. As his arm moved at the kitchen table to get a piece of chicken, I noticed it peeking out of his sleeve.
"What is that?" Kenny immediately pulled his sleeve down. "You don't have to hide it. I have one too." I pulled my sweater off my shoulder. So I could show him the mama crow watching over her babies; Abel, Alex, Ellie, Kenny and Thomas. Kyle had added Kenny and his sister shortly after we adopted them. Alex was my last and final baby in the nest in a lot of ways.
From that day forward Kenny and I got closer. We found some stable ground to bond on. He never actually said much. We didn't have long lengthy conversations but he was always open when I asked him something.
"I think I'll take a drive. Can you keep an eye on Alex for me? She is still asleep."
"I'll watch Squirt."
Abel never questioned why I wanted him to watch his sister. However, Kenny sure was surprised to see me and it was the first thing he said to me. "What are you doing here?"
"I came to see my son. I noticed Jax's bike out front. What are you guys up to?"
"We...well...I..."
"What's going on?" Jax made certain to pull the curtain to the back closed when I moved to look.
"Nothing. I stopped to see my son. What's going on here with you two?"
"Not much. Right, Kenny?"
"Yeah." Kenny agreed with Jax but refused to look at me. Then I knew.
There was something off about this whole thing. I didn't know what it was exactly, but I'd find out soon enough.
When Kenny was younger, I would build his favorite sundae just for him. It became our bonding moment we would steal together. We hadn't done it in a long time. Maybe he and I needed a little alone time. I made a special stop at the grocery store before I headed back.
The front door closed and I knew Kenny made it home. "Can you come in the kitchen for a minute?"
In a bowl I dipped his favorite ice cream, lots of snickers bar cut up on top of it. Followed by a puffy cloud of cool whip. "Here you go, honey."
Kenny looked around the kitchen in search of something. Then hesitated to sit down. "Am I in trouble or something?"
"Of course not. If there is something you want to tell me. Or there is something going on in your life, I am always here to listen."
"There isn't anything going on." My son devoured the ice cream. But had nothing at all to say further on the subject.
"Not even with Jax?" It was when Kenny halted the spoon in mid bite. He thought long and hard before he would answer my question.
"No."
Kenny finished up quickly. He wouldn't look at me and I knew he was lying. It only brought my worse fears to the surface. As a mother you wanted more for your children then you had. You wanted a better life for them.
"Well, if something does come up. You know I love you and I am always here when you need me."
"I know." He couldn't wait to race out of the kitchen to get away from me.
Alone I set at the table. Sipped a couple cups of coffee and thought about how to approach the situation. Which, it wasn't a true situation yet and I didn't really want it to become one either.
"Tara." Ellie said my name a couple of times before I even noticed her. "Tara, are busy tomorrow night?"
"No, why?"
"I thought maybe we can go have dinner together. There is also a art exhibit I want to stop at. If you want to go?"
"That sounds like fun. I'll call Nicole and see if she will watch the kids for me."
It made me happy Ellie wanted to do something with me. We had no alone time as we did when she was younger. Her life was busy with school, work and her new boyfriend. He wasn't someone I would exactly have chosen for my daughter. But she liked him so I kept my mouth shut.
When I thought back to how my father protested the boy I spent all my time with. How he told me Jax would ruin my life. How much he disliked the choices I made. It wasn't the type of parent I wanted to be. Mostly, I knew the wedge it would drive between me and my daughter if I spoke out against him. If she asked me though, I would definitely give my opinion on the boy.
Once Nicole agreed to keep Thomas and Alex for a few hours. I tried to come up something special for Ellie. She would graduate from college soon then begin her own life. I didn't have much time left with her.
Although she was doing everything she should by living life now while she was still young. Something I missed out on. I didn't want my daughter to find out later how much she missed with no outside life other than school and work.
When I was in college, I still had a hard time making friends. I had none. With really no personal life to extend beyond four walls. I dated once and found him to be another asshole I could add to my short list of men. He asked me out a few time and I reluctantly excepted. After a couple of dates, and I didn't put out, he was done with me.
A laugh came out of me. "I still have no personal life beyond work and my children." Hell I didn't care though. I already knew how empty it would become once my baby birds all grew up and left the nest. They had to spread their wings and find their own way. Make their own mistakes, my only wish for them was to not make the same ones I had.
What I did care about however, was when I shifted the clothes around in my closet. I had nothing nice in it for a night out. Then it came to me what I would do for myself and Ellie. Get as much mother, daughter, time out of this as possible.
We agreed to meet up after she was done with class. I spent the morning at work, after I shuffled around a few appointments, I would get out of here early. Several times I checked my watch until I could leave to meet my daughter. It was the first time, in a long time, I was excited about something. I had something to look forward to. It was always the little things in life that meant so much.
We hadn't done this together since Ellie graduated high school. She no longer required my assistance. It made me proud of her and sad she didn't really need me anymore. Every indication she gave, she had matured in to the young independent woman I wanted to her to be.
The couple of hours we both had didn't allow us much time to find a dress and shoes to match. The dress Ellie picked out for me, wasn't really my style. A red formal dress, shoulder less, it hit me at about my calves and clung to my body. But I loved the silk feeling against my skin, it brought back some good memories. I didn't love the price as much. For only one night out, for only clothes. I spent a fortune. When I hugged my daughter goodbye so she could go to her next class, it was all worth it.
From there I went home. I still had to get ready and get the kids ready too. Of course they loved Aunt Nicole and Uncle David's house. David was child like most of the time and played with them. More so Thomas because Alex had Holly to play with.
"I like it. You look pretty." At least my youngest thought so anyway. She set with her dollies on the bed while I done my hair. When it came to the makeup, I already knew what she wanted.
Lightly I swiped the large makeup brush across her face. Gave a little squirt of perfume she pranced through, as seen me do before. With only lip gloss applied she rubbed them together.
She had a pair of play dress up heels. Today was the first time I allowed her to clank around the house in mine. Today was also filled will so many emotions from my past and it brought back the good times I had shared with my mother.
When it became time to go, she wasn't convinced she couldn't wear my shoes but, I was. After a bit of a power struggle; I was the parent and she was the child. She finally got ready.
In a hurry I dropped them off so I wouldn't be late. Before they called us for our reserved table. We set at the bar. I ordered a glass of wine, which I had looked forward to all day long. Ellie got a coke to drink. Even though she was old enough, I'd never seen her have any kind of alcohol beverage. It was a decision I say she made from the past experiences of life.
They pulled out our chairs after they escorted us to the table. It had been so long since I had that kind of treatment. Where I felt special by those little actions in life that meant so much.
While I gazed at the menu, I tried to get my emotions in check. I'd done so well most of the time. Others, I just couldn't get myself under control. When my hand wiped under my eyes, I tried to be casual about it. Not to let this ruin the evening for us.
"I miss Kyle too. I think about him a lot. He was really the only father I had."
With a smile to my daughter I only nodded at what she said. If we continued this conversation, I would end up a blubbering mess and I didn't what that to happen tonight. We ate our dinner and discussed her future. A happy future was what I wanted for her. After I paid the check we left to attend the gala.
We spent almost a half an hour in line with the others. Waiting for the art gallery to open up. They were dressed in the finest clothes around us. You could tell they had money to burn.
"I didn't know you had an interest in art?"
"I really don't. There is only one I want to see." Ellie seemed distant since we arrived for some reason. When I tried to speak to her, she only gave me short answers.
Once the doors opened up, they only had the most expensive wine, Champagne and horderves to serve as well. You were given a catalog of the paintings available. Then I seen the price of the painting we stood in front of, fifteen thousand dollars. This place was too rich for my blood.
"Tara." Ellie got my attention through the crowd. She motioned for me to join her in the upcoming artist section. "There is a painting I want to show you."
It left me speechless. The artist put it all on the line to tell a story with it. There was so much to tell too. The colors mesmerized me. Along with the accelerated heart rate of a runner, it gave me seeing it before me.
"I'll wait for you outside. I just thought you should know. This is what Jax and Kenny kept from you. Kenny helped him on the graphics." I nodded to let Ellie know I heard her. I couldn't really say anything else. As all my focus was on the the woman in it.
In the center of the painting was a dark haired woman with fair skin. Her face was slightly obscured on one side, I still recognized myself though. What circled around my face, was my life.
The red dress stood out in contrast against the black and white that divided the canvas, she was stuck in the middle of a very gray area. Her eyes leaked the tears of what surrounded her. Four angels in the corner she focused on with just one tinier angel that flew past her down in the darkness . With the darkest shadow lurking at the bottom behind her, taunting her, tempting her. It faded across the canvas. Once it almost reached the tiny angel, it completely disappeared. She was divided in the gray area, by the good and the evil, she had to choose.
It was all my eyes could see, I almost missed the distant family in the background she never had or grew up to know. Her mother was only painted in a portion who stood with a father who stayed until the end.
"Darkest Night. Love all, trust a few, do no wrongs towards others. By Jackson Teller." The gold card engraved with the information was placed beside the painting. I tucked one of the plain white cards in my purse from the display.
"Interesting piece isn't it?" My long fog of thoughts ended when a woman spoke to me.
"Yes."
"So conflicted."
"Yes, the woman seems to be in the painting." It wasn't a statement. It was a true life experience.
"I wasn't referring to the woman, I meant the artist. They poured their heart out on the canvas. Made it come to life through their pain." A young man needed her assistance. She must of worked here. "Excuse me. I hope you enjoy the exhibit."
It always took an outsider with nothing at stake to show you the obvious. Jax must have labored hard when he painted it. Broke down the events in his life and mine that made the biggest impact on us. They brought us to where we were today.
The more I thought it through, the more I realized Jax was punishing himself in a way. Perhaps he couldn't bring out the words to express it. But he sure done a great job with what he painted. From experience, I punished myself more than anyone else ever could. I thought he done the same.
Since, this wasn't an event I was suppose to attend or even know about. I left. There was no need for Jax to see me here. I saw more than he could ever know or say to me even. Ellie waited outside by the cars for me. What she had to tell me left me in more of a shocked faze.
"I'm moving out."
"What? Why?"
"We both know why. It's time for me to start my life now. Justin said I can move in with him. I'll be able to finish the last six months of school and get a good job then. Besides, I need to give an honest effort to our relationship. I can't get him out of my heart, so I am going to follow it." I couldn't get a sentence together. One to form how I felt with my baby moving out. "I want your support on this, Tara. You mean a lot to me."
"I support you, honey. If you can't get someone out of your heart. Maybe they are suppose to be there."
"Maybe." Ellie never learned to trust men. The only one she had, left her life. Left her sad and broken when he died to save us. Part of the blame fell on me. I never trusted most men either. If I had instilled a different perspective for her, things could have been different now for her.
"She is her mother's daughter." As much as I wanted to stop Ellie from leaving, I wouldn't. She had to spread her wings and fly though. Find her own happiness and way. If she ever fell, I'd be there to catch her. When she walked away from me to start her new life, I only saw that young girl from years ago. I just didn't want to let her go.
"What are you doing here?" Tonight had been full of shocking moments. This was another, I was busted by the person who didn't want me here.
"I..."
"Did Kenny tell you?"
"No, he didn't. Ellie did. The painting is beautiful, Jax. I didn't know you are so talented. You look really nice too."
"I feel like an uptight asshole in this." He tugged the buttons on his shirt close to the collar. When he nervously shoved his hands in his pockets of the dress pants, Jax reminded me so much of Abel. Or perhaps, it was the other way around.
There was an awkward silence. Neither one of us knew what to say or do next. His weight shifted from foot to foot and I knew he was uncomfortable with my being here.
"I need to get home to the kids."
"Yeah, I need to get back in there. The painting sold."
"That's great, Jax. You should do another one."
"Nah, I'm not that guy and won't ever be." Jax took a couple more quick drags from his cigarette. When I drove by the art gallery he stomped it out on the sidewalk and went back inside.
When I walked through my front door. Something felt instantly different. It was a subtle nag of the heart strings. But, I couldn't shake it. After I got the kids to bed, I knocked on her door.
Before Ellie answered I promised myself, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't behave that way. I wouldn't make her feel guilty for her decision. I wouldn't show her how heartbroken I was. Yet, as soon as seen her face. All I could do was those things as I hugged my daughter close. I became a blubbering mother. "I am going to miss you so much."
"I'll just be across town. Don't think I am not grateful for all you done for me and Kenny, because I am. You took us in when no one wanted us. I...I guess that's what you are doing for Jax now. Or if you can't get someone out of your heart, maybe they are suppose to be there."
My daughter had left me speechless several times this evening. This was another one of those moments. Nothing I could say would change her mind from leaving. Nothing I would say would change her mind of how she truly felt about Jax, Opie and the club. Nothing I could say would make her my little girl again.
"I'm always here for you. You can always come home if you want to." Those were always the hardest words for a mother say. Always said in love. Always said in loss of their baby.
"I want you to have this. When it's time make sure Alexandria gets them." She pressed Kyle's dog tags on the gold chain in my hand. "I love you, Mom." It was the first and only time Ellie came out and called me her mother. It might be the only time I ever heard her say it. But, it was enough to last me for a lifetime.
There was a need for reflection upon tonight's events. I put on a pot of coffee. I also pulled out my best friend from the freezer, salted caramel ice cream. Those marvelous swirls through the vanilla always made me feel better for some reason.
The knock on the backdoor stopped the thoughts running in my mind. I peeked out the curtain before I opened it. "Would you like a cup of coffee?" I made my way to the pot and waited for his answer.
"Here's some money to help out. Thanks, Tara." Jax tossed ten one hundred dollars on the table and headed back to his place. When I called his name out, he grasp the door handle hard. "Yeah."
"Why did you paint it? I know it's me."
Jax refused to face me. He let go of the knob to claps it back in his hand again. As the screen was pushed open, I figured I'd get no answer. Before he took the step through it, he finally gave me one. "It took me a long time to realize. The club didn't kill Op. He died inside the day he lost Donna. The same way I died when you left me and took my sons away. It was my darkest night." With a close of the door, it was over between us . He had no more to say and I wouldn't ever ask again about it.
There was still one thing left for me do. With my coffee cup in hand, I plopped down on the bed. The brown paper crumpled as I pulled it off. "What the hell am I going to do with a three thousand dollar painting?"
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
If we never experience the chill of the darkness. It is very unlikely we will cherish the warmth of the light.
Unknown Author
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Love all, trust a few, do no wrong to none. Thou stopped loving me for the curse of wrongs, my darkest night.
William Shakespeare
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.
John 1:5
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
A sudden sound startled me from a deep sleep. It woke up my internal alarm. The goosebumps stood up until the hair on my arms tingled. It was hard for me to catch my breath even. Something bad was about to transpire and I didn't know who had invaded my home yet. From the night stand, I pulled out my gun. There was a lock for safety reasons and only I knew the code to it.
Quickly after I released it from the chamber, I held it close to me as I went towards the noise. Towards what the darkness held. As I passed Thomas and Sissy's rooms, I knew they were in bed safe and sound. I still proceeded with caution just in case Abel or Kenny came in late.
"Ellie?" I turned on the light in the kitchen to see it was her at the table. "What are you doing here, honey?" It had been months since she came to visit even though I constantly asked her to. I would get the occasional phone call from her if I called and left a messages as a reminder.
The closer I got to her, I didn't any farther explanation. The tears mixed with blood on the towel she held on her face was enough.
"I don't have any where else to go."
"You always have a place to go." My tears fell with my daughters. "What happened?"
"Justin and I got in to an argument. Then he hit me...then he hit me again." Her lip was split open. The bruises weren't at the worst yet. A black eye would take over the left side of her face tomorrow.
"It's okay, honey. I'm here." After I hugged her tightly to me. I got my medical bag to clean up her face. The sting from the antiseptic hit the wounds. She made a small noise but endured most of it without notice. I'd say that pain couldn't compare to what she had already endured tonight.
"Did Justin hit you?" Abel and Kenny were both up now too. Ellie wouldn't look them in the eyes. She nodded before she dropped her head. "That son of a bitch."
Abel lead the charge out the door. I knew all to well where they were going and what they would do. "Don't do this." The car went in reverse out the drive anyway. "Come back here."
"What's going on?" Jax was woke by my screaming at them.
"Justin hit Ellie. Abel and Kenny went to find him. I got to stop them before they do something stupid. He needs to pay for what he done to her but not at the expenses of my sons." My cellphone was opened and I was ready to make the call.
"Don't call the cops." Jax took my phone from me and closed it. "I'll handle it."
With just sweats on and a pair of shoes, Jax left on his bike too. "Come back here." It didn't stop him either. "Doesn't anybody ever fucking listen to me?"
With keys in hand, I headed out the door. "Watch Thomas and Alex." Of course I knew I didn't need to say it to Ellie. In her condition, I wasn't certain if she would hear me anyway.
By the time I pulled up to the little house Justin and Ellie rented together. An unexpected fight had broke out. As well as another in the front yard when Jax tried to get Abel and Kenny to stop beating on Justin.
"I hate you. Don't touch me." The raw emotions poured freely from my son. It was the most horrible thing for a parent to ever hear or witness on my end. Let alone on his father's because my son said it to his face and left no doubts.
"Good. Then don't become what I am." Jax handled the complete situation better than I ever could. He never raised his voice to his son even though his child had screamed in his face.
From the distance you could hear them coming. The sirens were the alert they would be here soon. With the blue and red lights cycling through the darkness they would come and take my sons away for what they had done.
"Get outta here." Jax's words only seemed to enrage Abel. He squared off with his father, only Jax didn't back down this time. "Don't try me. Go."
My son had no idea how much of a bad ass his father really could be. In the face of death and danger; Jackson Teller wouldn't flinch or think twice about the sure violence to follow. But Abel and Kenny finally left as asked to without any farther altercations.
"You rat on Abel or Kenny. I'll come back and you'll get more than a beat down next time. You better say I did this or when I get outta jail. There will be holy hell to pay." The kid had no clue what evil things Jax would do to him and how much he meant every word he said too.
For good measure, one more punch to the face. Just like Justin had done to Ellie was delivered to him by Jax for all to witness. The police existed their cars with guns drawn. Jax put his hands high in the air. Laid face down on the ground then laced his hands behind his back. He assumed the position without even being told so, he had assumed it so many times in his life.
First, I called home to make sure that's where the boys went. Then hit the ATM and waited for the cops to process him through.
"Thanks for the bail. I'll get you the money back when I can." Jax opened the envelope of his personal belongings they confiscated. He slipped all his rings back on as though nothing at all had happened tonight.
Except for the gold band that was once our circle of trust and love. He put it in his pocket as though it was where he carried it all the time. After all these years, he still had it. Of course, it belonged to John Teller once upon a time. A happier time in his life as well probably.
"I'll take you back to your bike." We didn't talk at all on the way to Justin's house. Yet it had to be said before Jax got out. "What happens now?"
"I ride my bike back to the house."
"No. I mean with Abel and Kenny?"
Jax lit up a smoke as soon as he was outside my car. "Nothing happens to them. I take the wrap for it."
"Jax, you have priors. You can do some serious time for this."
"Then so be it." The engine of his bike drowned out any comments he made afterwards.
It wasn't the first time I'd seen Jax have no fear for the outcome of the future. Show no fear of what came his way. Show no fear of a destined life in prison.
By the time I made it home. Everyone was up. Ellie set in the middle of Abel and Kenny on the couch. With Sissy and Thomas on the floor in front of them. They were all my babies. Some just had grownup problems right now.
A quiet tap on the door came. I flipped on the porch light to see. "Can I grab a cup of coffee? I need to buy some tomorrow."
"Sure." I let Jax in so he could get what he needed. They didn't have a warm welcome for him. Especially Abel.
"Everything was fine until he came."
"Your father went to jail for you tonight. You both should be grateful to him for it."
"It's okay." Jax was behind me and he must have heard it all. "Thanks for the coffee."
"This isn't over. We are going to talk about a lot of things." It was a warning to Abel and Kenny. But first I followed Jax outside. "Jax..."
"The kid is right. Chaos will always follow me. Only this time, I will be around to cleanup my own mess. Not burden you and them to do it."
"Jax, this isn't your fault. But I...I would really like to believe that you will too. Be around for them."
"Maybe some day you will believe, Tara." Jax went down the stairs with cup in hand. "You did a great job raising the kids. You should be proud of it."
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
A strength in a family, like strength in an army, relies on it's loyalty to each other.
Mario Puzo
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Love me or hate me, both are in my favor... If you love me,
I will always be in your heart...If you hate me, I will always be in your mind.
William Shakespeare
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
A house divided against itself cannot stand.
Mathew12:25
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
The day of reckoning came for us all. You could hide from it and possibly prolong it. But it comes at you full force where you couldn't escape it. The sins of your past, present comes to the surface and you pay for them in the future, somewhere down the line.
Today, was Jackson Teller's day. His past would effect the present situation. His future would serve as a reminder of it. More than likely, he would serve a minim of ten years for his actions. A judge would determine his outcome.
Only, this time Jax was innocent. He chose to take the consequences for our son and Ellie without wavering. Many times I asked Jax if he was certain this was what he wanted to do. He faced a sentence for the love of his child and never thought twice about it.
As I glanced over at Abel, who set quietly beside me, on a bench of a court room. He looked stressed, pale and fearful. I could only imagine what he would have been like if his father hadn't taken the blame for him.
My hand went on top of his, a mother's comforting touch. I gave him a smile to tell him all would be alright. Although, I wasn't certain of it myself.
However, I would have some strong and harsh words for my other son. Who failed to show up here as we discussed. It wasn't like Kenny to not do what he said he would. He and Abel needed to see this, experience the freight from it. Hopefully, it would scare them down the straight and narrow path to never stray from it.
My arrest came about the same age as my son. It put so much fear in me, I changed my ways. The path I took went in the opposite direction of Charming. It was my savior looking back. The only reason I went on with life and tried to make something of myself. I could only hope this done the same for my sons.
"All rise." The bailiff announced the judge's presence. His long black robe flowed as he went straight to his throne. He was king of this court room. He was judge, jury and executioner. He was the one to determine how much punishment and pain would be inflicted. As Jax had determined about so many others in his lifetime.
It went pretty much as expected. The lawyer I hired suggested that Jax take the plea deal. It was the best he was going to get from the judge. If Jax plead guilty. He would get three years, possible parole with good behavior after one year. The judge had no mercy on him after reviewing his long rap sheet. Although, there was a time in Jax's life he showed no mercy on others either.
Jax never seemed upset or scared of what was before him. He looked back at his son and locked eyes with Abel. When Jax nodded to lawyer, it was almost over. As the lawyer stood to announce their acceptance, their surrender.
Just when you thought hope was lost, all was gone. Sometimes, a miracle happened you didn't see coming. When my son and daughter came through the set of doors. It was exactly that.
Kenny held Ellie's hand until he had to let go of her. He took the bench behind where Jax set. She whispered something to the lawyer.
"Your honor, we have a witness to present in the defense of Jackson Teller." I thought Jax was just as surprised as I was about what just transpired. Ellie came to face the one person she feared the most at the moment and help defend the other one she feared as a child.
Ellie had already stated there was no way in hell she would push charges against Justin. She feared what would come if she had. She saw enough when she was only a small girl to know how this really worked. If you ratted out someone with the cops. You had no protection from the police. You had no safe place to run to get away from them. You had no peace in a future life.
She watched what happened as a small frightened girl when the club thought Opie had ratted them out. They killed her mother. She had lived with it since. There was not anyone who could change her mind. Yet, some how, Kenny had.
Today would mark a turning point for Ellie in life. Her battered face would heal a long time before her battered heart. She never trusted men and when she allowed one in. He had hurt her, abused her and sent her back to the fearful child she once was.
There were only two ways she could go from here. Forward as a loner which would not trust another man. A life of sorrow, fear and never belonging. Or she would only become a stronger woman from this day on because of it. When she found her love of a lifetime, she would hold on and never let go. If I had anything to say about it, she would move forward and become the woman I should have years ago.
Ellie was still a prisoner of her childhood; attempting to create a new life, she re-encountered the trauma repeatedly. You had to cling to the hope that growing up would bring escape and freedom. Some day, she would be before her own children and then she would know for certain what all this meant.
While I watched my daughter on the stand. I broke down along with her. She raised her head up so everyone had a good look at her face, what that boy had done to her. She looked him in the eyes and told her story, her truth. The truth that would set her free from his clutches.
Once Ellie set down with us from the long detailed testimony she gave, we waited for the verdict the judge would deliver. I held my daughter close to me. Not only to protect her but to let her know, her mother would always be here for her. She could always count on me. She would always be a part of our family no matter what happened.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
God often uses our deepest pain as a launching pad for our greatest calling.
Spiritual Inspiration
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Truth is truth to the end of reckoning.
William Shakespeare
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.
Ecclesiastes 12:14
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
I hope you enjoyed reading me!
If you are wondering why each section has the quotes. The bible, William Shakespeare and mythology all tie together. If you will notice most of those quotes are always similar.
The same way Kurt Sutter used them to create; The Sons of Anarchy. He contends it's mostly Hamlet but I call foul on it. Look at the ending of the last season. Nine crows are shown on the screen in the final scene. The crow caws just before he embarks on his last journey, last act. With Jax's arms extended out just like when Jesus was nailed to the cross.
I believe its a reference to the Last Supper. When the homeless woman gave him the blanket, the camera switched to a bottle. Which looked like it contained blood, along with bread. These two items are given to his disciples, Jesus, when he knows what Judas had done to him, along with his likely end. Which, I did point out in this story and those similarities.
In the final scene, we see the crows eating the bread, and Jax's blood come onto the screen. Wine; blood and bread; body. Which, is them taking a soul to carry. It is also the same way the story started, with crows and bread. The same as when Jax rode to Opie's house after Donna died.
This being after his sacrifice to remove the "original sin" from his sons and we discussed this through out the story numerous times. . If he had stayed alive, they would have continued into the club life. This was an extremely religious moment for Jax. He took the burden of his sins from his sons.
However, we were led to believe JT done the same for his son. But, the cycle continued on. Why?
We also discussed the nine circles of heaven and the nine circles of hell variations in each chapter.
I would love to hear your thoughts on this as well. Perhaps you seen something I missed.
Stay with me on the story, we are almost at the end...