A/N: Thanks for your reviews.
(Johanna's fear of heights was mentioned in Apologize Chapters 6, 21, and 27)
Chapter 3 – Fourth of July
Two months after the kiss
Johanna rubbed her fingers across her forehead as she walked down the hallway towards the break room with a sense of purpose. She had been in court all morning and while things had gone smoothly enough, her head was beginning to pound. She needed caffeine, and she needed it now. She could hear voices coming from the room as she approached, and her ears perked up as she thought she had detected Jim's voice among them. Caffeine and Jim were a good combination; she thought to herself, both would make her happy.
"Are you coming, Sassy?" Jeff asked as she entered the room.
"Coming to what?" she asked.
"The fourth of July picnic."
"I thought that was off," Johanna said as she fixed a cup of coffee.
"It's back on," Jim stated as he caught her eye.
She smiled at him, as always, and then shifted her attention back to Jeff and the rest of the small crowd gathered in the room. "Where's it going to be?"
"Up on the roof," Zach Nelson answered. "The boss gave his permission."
Her stomach tied into knots at the thought of it. "The roof?" she said, her nose wrinkling in distaste.
"Do you know a better place to see fireworks?" Stanley Carmichael said snidely.
She groaned internally. If she had known that Stanley was in the room she wouldn't have came in. She would've done without the coffee for awhile longer. "I usually find watching them from the ground to be sufficient."
"What's wrong, Johanna. Are you afraid to go up on the roof?" he taunted.
"No, of course not," she lied. "I just don't like it."
"I think she's afraid of heights," Steve Lancaster piped in, a smirk on his lips as if he found the fear to be ridiculous.
"I'm not," she insisted.
"So little Miss thinks she's all that is afraid of heights," Stanley stated with a grin. "Isn't that something…especially coming from someone who thinks she's so high and mighty?"
"Back off Stanley," Jim warned.
He shot Jim a snide look. "I don't take orders from you."
"Leave her alone," he said firmly. "She said she's not afraid, she just doesn't like it. A lot of people don't."
Johanna appreciated his defense of her but she could tell that it was only fueling Stanley's need to pick at her, but he was beat to it by Melanie Thompson.
Melanie looked at her, cattiness written all over her features. "It's so childish to have a fear of heights," she sniffed.
Johanna smirked, "I'm not afraid, and even if I was, a fear of heights is far less childish than the fear of sleeping alone…and we all know how you suffer from that fear, Melanie."
Jim smiled as her barb struck her opponent. Melanie glared at her, her fake smile turning into a tight thin line before she regained her composure.
"I don't ever worry about sleeping alone," Melanie retorted. "I never have to, unlike some people."
Johanna smirked, "Some of us are more choosey than others about the offers we accept."
"Just what are you implying?" Melanie demanded to know.
She shrugged, "Nothing. I was just making a generalized statement about how some women say no more than others."
"I think you're just trying to change the subject," Stanley stated. "You can dish it out but you can't take it when your flaws are exposed."
"I didn't know it was a character flaw to dislike roof top gatherings," Johanna retorted. "I was brought up with the thought that outdoor gatherings occurred in backyards and in the park. Not on the dirty roofs of buildings."
"What, are you afraid of dirt too?" Zach teased.
Johanna rolled her eyes, "This is stupid."
"Why don't all of you get off her back?" Jim stated.
"I will once she admits that's she's afraid," Stanley replied.
"I'm not admitting it," Johanna remarked; "Because I'm not afraid."
"Then you won't mind proving it to us," he said; that arrogant smile on his face that Jim hated.
"Johanna has already proved to you the one thing we all already know, Stanley," Jim remarked.
"And what's that?" his colleague asked snidely.
"That you're an incompetent jackass," Jim told him, referring to the recent occasion when Johanna had called out Stanley for botching the details of a case they had been working on.
"Watch your mouth, Beckett," Stanley retorted sharply. "I have more sway in this firm than you do."
"I don't care how much sway you have in this firm," Jim remarked tartly. "That doesn't give you the right to run your mouth."
Stanley smirked and shifted his attention back to Johanna, "He wants to defend you, isn't that sweet?"
"Sweetness is something you'll never be accused of, Stanley" Johanna replied.
"When you're a junior partner, you don't have to be sweet," he remarked.
"It's too bad it's not a requirement for junior partnerships," Jeff chimed in. "You'd be out on street, Stan…and I can't think of anyone who would miss you."
"I make a contribution here," Stanley said, puffing himself up as if it would make him seem more important and dignified.
"What do you think the rest of us do here?" Jeff asked. "Stand around and look pretty?"
"Prettiness is something else that Stanley lacks," Jim commented, earning himself a grin from Johanna.
Stanley glared at him. "It's no wonder that you and her get along so well," he said with gesture towards Johanna. "You both think you're something more than you are, and you're not. You're both nothing."
"Well if that means I'm nothing like you," Johanna retorted, "Then I'll take that as a compliment and thank you for it."
"The one thing you'll never have to worry about me doing, Johanna McKenzie," Stanley said snidely, "Is offering you a compliment. In my opinion you don't even belong here."
"Well I guess your opinion doesn't count for much, now does it; because I'm here and I'm not going anywhere so you may as well get used to it…just like I've accepted the fact that I have to deal with you on a daily basis."
He looked at her through narrowed eyes, "I may have to deal with you, but not forever. I can assure you that I'll be here longer than you will be."
Jeff had glanced at his best friend and could see that Jim was growing angrier each time Stanley made a remark about Johanna.
"Don't be so sure about that, Stan," Jeff stated; knowing that Stanley hated it when he addressed him as 'Stan'. "A disgruntled colleague might kill you."
"Well this has been fun," Johanna said, sensing it was time to get out of Dodge. "But I have work to do."
"I bet you don't have the guts to show up at the picnic," Stanley stated, wanting to get in one last dig.
Johanna turned and looked at him. "I'll be there," she said firmly, all the while screaming at herself inside.
He scoffed, "We'll just see about that."
"I guess we will," she retorted and then she walked out of the room.
When she was out of sight, Stanley turned to the occupants of the room, "Ten bucks says she doesn't show."
"You can't be serious," Jim stated. "You're actually going to bet on her?"
"If you have a problem with it, Beckett, you're free to leave," Stanley stated.
He scowled at him in disgust and then left the room. He wasn't going to have anything to do with placing bets on whether Johanna was going to show up or not. He had seen the look that had been on her face when she turned and left the room. She looked half sick. His mind was putting things together. He had run into her at the library a few weeks before. He had found her gazing up at a high shelf as she bit her lip and when he asked her what was wrong, she told him that the book she needed was on a shelf she couldn't reach. The ladder was there beside her and when he mentioned it she brushed it off saying that she didn't think she should climb in the shoes she was wearing. He had glanced at her feet and saw the heels she had on and had agreed and he had retrieved the book for her without a second thought. Now he knew that it hadn't been her shoes. She was afraid of heights…and now she was going to force herself to show up at this event to prove that she wasn't.
Jim felt like this scenario had all the possibilities of ending with Johanna being humiliated and he hated the thought of it. He supposed that he could try and talk her into not going through with it, but he knew it would be futile. She had the tendency of being stubborn and if she had it in her head to prove herself then she would try regardless of what he said or how she felt about the situation. As he walked towards his own office, he figured the only thing he could do was to be there and try to keep her from being humiliated or tormented.
Johanna walked into her office and shut the door behind her before facing her secretary.
"What's wrong?" Sharon asked.
"I just accepted my invitation to the fourth of July picnic."
Sharon's eyes widened, "They're having that on the roof!" she exclaimed in a hushed voice.
"You know, you could've told me that before I ran into people," Johanna commented.
"You didn't give me a chance. You came in from court and asked how long you had before your meetings started and then when I wanted to fill you in on what was going on; you said that it would have to wait because the need for caffeine had temporarily replaced gossip at the top of your hierarchy of needs."
"Don't ever let me replace gossip with the need for caffeine again," Johanna told her. "I get myself in trouble when I don't know what's going on around here."
"Just don't go," Sharon replied. "It's like it's something mandatory. Say you have a family thing to go to."
"I can't," she said as she paced the room.
"Why not?"
Johanna filled her in on the conversation that had taken place in the break room and when she finished she looked to her friend and said, "I'm going to end up making a fool out of myself. What am I going to do?"
"Simple," Sharon told her. "Tomorrow I'll come over and we'll get you over your fear of heights."
She shot her a look, "Do you really think that it's going to be that easy to cure me of a fear that I've had since I was five?"
"It can be; do you want to be cured?"
"Of course I do!" she exclaimed. "I don't want to look stupid."
"Well then, tomorrow we'll see what we can do about it. I'm game if you are."
Johanna thought about it for a moment as her teeth sunk into her lip. "Okay," she told her. "We'll try."
The next day, Sharon pulled out one of Johanna's kitchen chairs and motioned for her to climb up on it. "Come on," she said. "We'll start you off small and work our way up."
Johanna rolled her eyes. "Sharon, I can stand on a chair. That isn't high enough to bother me."
Sharon slid the chair over to the counter. "Good, then climb up on the chair and then step up on the counter, that's a little higher."
Johanna sighed as she looked at the counter. She hated this. It was stupid…which is why you have to get over it, she told herself. The counter top didn't look very daunting, surely she could handle that. It probably wouldn't put her up too much higher than the chair did. She could do this, she was grown woman and it was time to get over this nonsense.
She found an ounce of confidence and latched on to it as she approached the chair and climbed up on it. She stood there for a moment, getting her bearings and then looked to her friend.
"You okay?" Sharon asked.
"I'm fine," she replied and then she took a breath and placed a hand against the cupboard to brace herself as she lifted a foot up onto the counter and hoisted herself up. Once she was standing on the counter, she turned around to face Sharon and she froze. What hadn't looked so daunting suddenly had her holding her breath. She was making it worse than it really was, she thought to herself. She wasn't really up as high as her mind was making it seem…but she knew that she'd be able to easily touch the ceiling if she raised her hand, and that made the floor seem even further away.
"Breathe, Jo," Sharon told her.
She forced herself to focus on her friend's voice and she took a few breaths and calmed herself down. She was okay…she wasn't going to fall…she was fine. It wasn't that high, she told herself. She stood there silently for a few moments, forcing herself to resist the urge to climb back down and after a few minutes she wasn't as shaken as she had been. She still didn't like it, it didn't feel comfortable but she could handle it and she could breathe normally.
Sharon eyed her, "You doing okay up there?"
"Yeah," she said with a slight smile on her lips. "I think I'm okay. I still don't like it but I don't feel as panicky."
"Great; we're making progress."
"What do you have planned next? I think we're limited for options at my apartment."
"We'll go to the library and you can climb the ladder."
"Forget it!" Johanna exclaimed. "I am not doing that."
"Why not?"
"Because I'll get half way up and freeze and I'll make a fool out of myself. I hate making a fool out of myself in public, Sharon. You know that."
"We'll find a section that no one is in. Something boring that no one is interested in."
"People will still see me," Johanna remarked. "I go to the library a lot and I'd really hate to have to stop going out of shame."
"Okay, fine," Sharon relented. "It's a nice day; we'll go to Coney Island and go on the rides."
"No!" she exclaimed. "That's still a public place."
"But you won't stand out there," her friend told her. "A lot of people get scared on the rides. We need to get you on the roller coaster and the Ferris wheel."
Johanna's eyes widened, "Are you crazy?"
"What? It'll be okay. I'll be right there with you."
"No," Johanna stated as she shook her head vigorously.
"Johanna," Sharon said as she put a hand on her hip and gave her best friend her best no nonsense look. "You said you wanted to get over this, now how are you going to do that if you don't get your feet off the ground?"
"My feet are off the ground," she stated as she gestured to her position on the counter.
"Yeah and you're hanging on to the handle of that cupboard for dear life."
"But I'm breathing normally."
"And once we take a few spins on the Ferris wheel, you'll breathe normally at that height too," Sharon replied.
Johanna sighed heavily. "Sharon, I've gone the Ferris wheel route once before. It didn't work."
"When was this?"
"When I was six. My father said no child of his was going to be a coward, so while we were at Coney Island, he made me get on the Ferris wheel with Frankie. I begged him not to make me get on but he picked me up and put me in the seat."
"Don't take this personally, Jo," her friend said; "But I can't stand your father. He's an arrogant bastard. The few times I've been subjected to him have led me to drink."
"I know the feeling."
"So what happened on the Ferris wheel with Frankie?" Sharon inquired.
"Well he knew I was terrified and he enjoyed that. The entire way up he was telling me that it would get stuck at the very top and that no one would be able to get us down and we'd have to jump. By the time we made it to the very top I was crying and Frankie thought it would be fun to rock the seat and tell me how easy it would be for me to fall out since I was so small. He told me I'd die. So then, along with crying, I screamed my head off until they let me off and then I got in trouble for causing a scene. My father told me I was an embarrassment and that I better stop my bawling or he'd give me a reason to cry. Of course I was so upset I couldn't stop crying so when we got to the parking lot he let me have it."
"You actually got a whipping for that?" Sharon asked incredulously.
"Yes, and truth be told, I would've rather had the whipping instead of being put on that Ferris wheel with my brother."
Sharon sighed in disgust at the thought of her friend's family. "I hate your brother. He's a first class jackass."
Johanna laughed, "He has his moments."
"He must've inherited it from your father. I don't even know why you have anything to do with your Dad and his nastiness."
"It's not that easy to write him off. He's my father, I can't just pretend like he doesn't exist and I can't not go over there. My mom is there and I love her and want to see her."
"Tell her to come to you."
"I can't do that," Johanna replied. "And I really don't want to discuss it."
"Okay," Sharon said; raising a hand in surrender. She knew she could only push her so far in that area. "Let's get back to the business at hand. Let's go to Coney Island and get you over your fear."
"No."
"Come on, Jo," she said lightly. "It'll be fun. Maybe we can pick up some guys."
"I don't feel like picking up guys."
Sharon's eyes twinkled with mischief, "You haven't felt like picking up guys ever since you left that party with Jim a couple of months ago."
She rolled her eyes but her cheeks flooded with color. "Nothing happened."
"That's what you keep saying but I don't buy it."
"We had coffee."
"Uh huh," Sharon said as if she believed they had something more than just coffee.
"We didn't sleep together!" Johanna announced.
Sharon burst into laughter and Johanna's cheeks reddened more. "I didn't say anything about sex," Sharon stated.
"But you were thinking it," she said defensively.
"Obviously so were you since that's where your mind went."
"My mind went there because yours always goes there and I didn't want you to think that something happened that didn't."
"But something happened," Sharon said as she looked at her with an assessing gaze.
"What makes you say that?"
"I told you, you haven't wanted to pick up guys…so I think maybe you already nabbed one and you're holding out on me. Something happened with you and Jim. I can tell."
"I haven't wanted to go looking for guys because I've been busy!" she protested. "You should know that, you are my secretary."
Sharon waved a dismissive hand. "Come on, spit it out. What really happened after the coffee?"
Johanna sighed in slight annoyance, "He kissed me, okay! Are you happy now?"
Sharon clapped her hands together and laughed. "I knew it! I knew you were holding out on me! Of course I'm happy to hear this, the real question though is were you happy?" she said deviously.
She couldn't help the smile that spread across her face as she continued to blush. "Yes, I was…thrilled…twice."
"Twice!" Sharon exclaimed. "He kissed you twice and I'm just now hearing about it! Get down from there and start talking," she demanded as she held out a hand to steady her as she climbed down off the counter.
When Johanna's feet touched the floor, her best friend started in on her again. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Johanna shrugged, "Some girl's don't kiss and tell."
"You've always told me! How long have we known each other?"
"Too long?" Johanna asked mischievously. She and Sharon had gone to different high schools but they had met while working as waitresses during the summer before senior year.
"Never mind that," Sharon laughed as she swatted her arm. "I just can't believe you kept this from me."
"Well I didn't want you making something out of it," Johanna said. "You do try and throw me at him every chance you get."
"I only throw you at him because you hesitate to do it yourself…and besides, you know you like being thrown at him. I've seen the way you look at him…I've seen the way he looks at you."
She rolled her eyes, "We're just friends."
"Friends who've kissed," Sharon stated with a grin.
"It hasn't happened since then."
"It will," her friend said. "Once it starts…there's no stopping it for long."
"I doubt that."
"So; how was it?"
Johanna laughed as she blushed once again, "Really? We're going to do this? Are we seventeen again?"
Sharon nodded, "Yes, we're really going to do this, and as for age, seventeen isn't that far in the past."
"I guess that's true."
"I'm waiting on an answer," her friend reminded her.
She couldn't control the smile that slipped into place, "It was…incredible. Both times."
Sharon smiled widely, "You know what we should do?"
"I'm afraid to ask," Johanna replied.
"We should discuss this on the way to Coney Island."
"Discuss what?"
"You and Jim."
"There is no me and Jim," Johanna told her. "There's just me and there's just him."
"Uh huh," Sharon said. "Except for those moments when you're joined at the lips."
"Oh my god!" Johanna exclaimed. "I should've never told you."
"Of course you should've," Sharon replied. "I'm your best friend. Now come on, let's go to Coney Island. I won't force you to get on the rides. We'll just look and see how brave you're feeling and while we're doing that, you'll give me the details that you've been withholding."
She threw up her hands in surrender. "Fine, but I promise nothing."
"Except for the details, right?"
Johanna laughed, "Right."
A few days later, Johanna stood outside the door that would lead her to the roof top of the law firm's building. She didn't want to do this. Her trip to Coney Island hadn't been successful. One look at that Ferris wheel and her stomach had felt like it dropped to her toes. Sharon managed to talk her into trying the roller coaster…it hadn't been too bad, but she had kept her eyes closed the whole time and the speed had helped.
The thought crossed her mind that she could leave and no one would ever know that she had been there but she couldn't. She didn't want to hear about her absence for the next week. Johanna took a breath and steeled herself; there was no point in stalling. Just get it over with, she thought as she grasped the knob of the door and opened it, forcing herself to step out onto the roof.
She felt her heart starting to pound and she felt sick to her stomach as her gaze took in the view of the skyline. "I can do this," she told herself. All she had to do was force her feet to move away from the door, which was easier said than done. The sky looked too close which only served to remind her of how high up she was and while she couldn't see the street from where she stood, she knew it was much too far away.
"Just breathe," she whispered as a tremor of panic shot through her. She clenched the handles of her purse and made herself move. "One step at a time," she coaxed herself. "Don't go near the edges, don't look down…don't look up. Look at people instead."
That was all she had to do. She just had to find a safe place and stay in it and keep her gaze centered and she'd be fine. She forced herself to concentrate on the sound of the radio and the voices of her colleagues. She breathed in the scent of the food but nothing seemed to ease the knot in her stomach and she inwardly cringed as Jeff's voice called out, "There's Sassy." She could've used a few more minutes of anonymity. She forced a smile to her lips and moved towards the gathering, conjuring up the look of confidence that she didn't feel.
Sharon caught her eye and smiled encouragingly and she returned the gesture as she spoke her greetings to the colleagues she was friendly with. Jim appeared at her side out of nowhere and she could see him assessing her features as they said hello. He could see right through her guise and she knew it. She could see the wheels turning in his head and she could imagine the words that would follow.
She held his gaze, silently begging him not to say anything about it. The words Jim had been about to speak momentarily died on his lips; but then as his gaze roamed over her, taking in the sight of her in her white t-shirt and shorts that had obviously been cut off from a pair of jeans; he saw the white knuckled grip she had on the short straps of her purse and he couldn't let it pass. It was ridiculous. She shouldn't feel like she had to be standing on a roof top when she was afraid to do so. This bullying by Stanley, Melanie and Zach was akin to the type of nonsense that should've been left behind in junior high and he couldn't stand it… he hated it even more when it was being directed at Johanna.
"You don't have to prove anything to them, Jo," he said quietly.
"Yes I do," she remarked. "If I didn't show up I'd never hear the end of it and it would be a source of ridicule I'd have to deal with everyday until they found something else to amuse them and you know it."
"So you're going to torment yourself?"
"It's better than having them do it for me. I'll be fine, don't worry about it."
That was easier said than done, Jim thought to himself. He often found himself worried about her. Just like lately he found himself hanging around the office on days when she was working late so he could drive her home. He didn't like the thought of her walking after dark and he didn't particularly care for the thought of her being in a cab by herself at night either.
He looked at her for a long moment and relented. She was determined to do this and he'd have to let her…for now, he thought. If she was still tense and uncomfortable after an hour, he'd broach the subject again.
"Come sit down," he told her as his hand found the small of her back.
She smiled gratefully and hoped that he would lead her to one of the card tables that wouldn't afford her a view over the ledge.
"Hey, Johanna," Stanley Carmichael called out, causing her to freeze in her tracks and turn to face him.
"What?" she asked; feeling annoyance growing within her.
Stanley plucked a can of soda from the cooler and waved it at her. "If you want a drink, it'll be right over here," he stated as he set the can on the ledge of the roof.
The taunting burned her, right along with Melanie's laughter that followed.
"Go to hell, Stanley," Johanna told him.
He smiled smugly, "I was only offering you a drink."
"No," Jim stated, "You were only living up to your reputation as an ass."
"Hey, Stan," Jeff called out. "I have an idea, how about instead of sitting that can on the ledge, you climb up there and stand and I'll throw the cans at you and see if I can knock you down."
The crowd laughed as Stanley turned red with indignation.
"I think you should be fair about it, Jeff," Jim stated. "Give everyone a chance to play the game."
"You're right," Jeff remarked. "We can even make some money off the deal. Ten cents for two chances to knock Stanley off the building."
"The winner gets to pick his pockets before we call the ambulance," Jim remarked, causing Johanna to subtly nudge him. He should probably stay out of it but he couldn't help himself. He wanted Stanley to get a taste of his own medicine.
"Don't be ridiculous," Stanley bellowed as he glared at them.
"What's wrong, Stan, are you afraid?" Jeff asked. "I'll give you a fair chance. One can will be empty and one will be full."
"You're an idiot."
"Don't talk about yourself that way, Stanley," Jim stated. "Give yourself some credit; you're way worse than an idiot."
Jeff took the comment and expounded upon it, keeping Stanley distracted as Jim guided Johanna the rest of the way to the table.
"I appreciate that the two of you want to defend me," Johanna said quietly as she laid a hand on his wrist. "But don't lose your jobs over it, I'm not worth it."
The statement sent a small jolt of anger through him and he held her gaze as he leaned closer. "Don't you ever say you're not worth something again," he said firmly.
"Jim," she began to say.
"Don't," he told her as his hand settled on her bare knee.
She bit back her words as she continued to hold his gaze.
"You're worth it," he repeated as his hand caressed her knee for a moment.
She smiled slightly and nodded, telling him that she'd drop her argument to the contrary.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"I'm okay," she said quietly. "I don't like it but I figure if I don't move around too much I should be alright."
He gave her a sympathetic smile and settled back, intent on remaining by her side.
Time moved slowly and her discomfort never eased. It was wearing on her as she watched her colleagues lean over the ledge or sit upon it. It made her nervous; she could envision someone falling and it unnerved her. She couldn't help but wonder if Stanley had picked up on her unease as he made a show of 'accidentally' knocking the can of soda off the roof and then looked at her while he laughed.
Seeing the can go over the edge had made her stomach clench. She couldn't stand it and yet her pride kept her from budging.
"I think you've proved enough, Jo," Jim's voice whispered in her ear as he draped his arm around the back of her chair.
"Meaning?"
"Meaning you've lasted almost two hours. I think you can leave feeling vindicated."
"If I leave this early, they'll still talk."
"Let them talk."
"That's easy for you to say."
"Stop being stubborn, Johanna."
"I'm fine," she insisted.
"No you're not," Jim stated. "You're as white as a sheet and I swear you're barely breathing."
She had been afraid that her discomfort was visible and having Jim point it out to her only made her feel worse. She'd made it up to the roof and yet she still couldn't shake the fear and in her mind that was failure…and she hated to fail. That was coupled with the fact that she knew if she was the only one to leave early, everyone would know why.
"I'll go with you," Jim said, as if he had read her mind.
"You don't have to do that. I don't want you to miss out because of me."
"Miss out on what? There isn't anything going on here that interests me. Come on, we'll go to the park and have a better time on our own."
"What about the fireworks? Don't you want to see them from up here?"
He shook his head, "I can see them just fine in the park…with you."
She really did want to leave, the picnic was boring and it would be nice to be able to breathe normally again…and if she was to leave with Jim, it wouldn't look quite so suspicious. People would still talk, but they'd talk about the reason of why they had left together and that was better than having her fears thrown in her face.
"Okay," she relented. "I'm ready to go."
Jim made sure that no one was paying attention to them and then he rose from his chair and took her hand when she followed his lead. He swiftly guided her to the door and he was glad to see that by the time they reached the street, she appeared to be getting her color back and breathing normally.
Once they were settled onto a bench in the park with an array of snacks and sodas that they had bought from the various vendors they had passed, he decided to broach the topic of her fear. "Have you always been afraid of heights?" Jim asked.
"No, when I was a little girl I was fearless."
"What happened to change that?"
Her gaze dropped away from his face and she was quiet for a few moments and Jim waited patiently as she debated whether she should tell him her story or not. Finally, her gaze met his once again.
"My brother hated me," she stated, a small smile on her lips as if she was trying to make it seem like a light hearted statement but he saw through it and took note of the sadness that lingered in the depths of her eyes.
"Why?"
She shrugged, "I don't know, it's just always been that way. I guess he hated me because I was born. He was an only child until I came along.
"That's not your fault. He should take that up with your parents."
Johanna laughed softly. "I'd like to be a fly on the wall for that conversation."
"So how does your brother play into your fear of heights?"
"Well like I said, he hated me," she reiterated, "But that didn't stop me from wanting to follow him around when I was little. He was climbing the tree in our back yard one day and I, of course, climbed up after him."
"How old were you?"
"Five," Johanna said. "My brother was eight. He told me to go away, that he didn't want me following him but I didn't listen. I kept going, and he kept threatening me. He told me if I didn't get down, he'd push me and make me fall. I guess I should've believed him, after all he was always pushing me, pulling my hair, hitting me, but I kept going and I caught up to him. We were a good ways up in the tree and I was standing on the limb with him. He told me again that he was going to push me and I made the mistake of saying 'No you won't'. Frankie always did like anything he could take as a dare, so he shoved me and I fell."
Jim looked stunned by the statement. "Your brother actually pushed you out of a tree?"
She nodded, "Yes."
"Were you hurt or did you get lucky and escape with a few bumps and bruises?"
"I broke my arm. The doctor said I was lucky that I didn't break more than that falling from the height that I did. I was pretty sore though, I hit the ground hard."
"Good God," Jim said as he imagined the scene she had painted. "I hope your brother got it good for that one."
Johanna scoffed, "With the exception of my mother yelling at him, he didn't get punished at all."
"He didn't get punished?"
"No."
"How is that possible!" Jim exclaimed; a surge of anger swimming within him at the thought of Johanna being hurt by her brother.
"Because my father said it was my fault. He said that I shouldn't have been up there in the first place."
"You weren't supposed to be up there but it was alright for your brother to be up there and to push you out?"
"Pretty much," she replied. "My father is under the impression that only boys climb trees. Little girls are supposed to jump rope and play tea party. When my mother brought up the fact that it was still wrong for Frankie to push me, he said that boys will be boys."
"All kids climb trees," Jim stated as he grew even more outraged. "My sister climbed trees and I can assure you that I never pushed her out of one and neither did my brothers. If we had, my father would've made sure that we found it difficult to sit down for the next week."
"Frankie's the golden child," Johanna told him. "He does no wrong in my father's eyes. I do all of the wrong. It was my fault for climbing up the tree, and in his mind, I got pushed because I provoked my brother into doing it by being a pest. It was also my fault because I was stupid and didn't have the sense god gave a goose."
Jim looked at her for a long minute. "Please tell me that your father didn't say that to you."
He took note of the fact that she began to toy with her emerald ring again and he was beginning to realize that she did that whenever she spoke of her father.
"He always says that to me."
"But you were a little girl," Jim said. "Who tells a five year old that they're stupid and have no sense?"
She smiled sadly, "Frank McKenzie believes that stupidity knows no age. He doesn't care if you're five, fifteen, twenty-five, or even ninety-five; if he thinks you're stupid, he'll tell you so. He said if I had behaved the way I should've, I wouldn't have gotten hurt. He said that I deserved it and that maybe it would teach me a lesson, but of course he had to be the one to pay for my stupidity in the form of doctor's bills so he was being punished for my actions too. It's probably a good thing my arm was broke. It probably spared me from being the one who would've found it difficult to sit down for a week."
He couldn't believe it. He just couldn't fathom that someone would treat a five year old that way. What kind of monster had she grown up with?
"Didn't your mother do anything?" he asked. Surely her mother had stepped in, or at least he hoped so.
"What could she do?" Johanna asked. "I don't think she would've let him hit me but there wasn't much she could do about the yelling except to tell him to stop, and he rarely ever listened to that. If he wants to yell, he yells and he doesn't stop until he's finished. She told me he didn't mean the things that he said, that he was just upset that I was hurt, but we both knew she was lying. She held me while I cried and she ignored his order that she wasn't to take me to the movies the next weekend, but really, there was nothing else she could do."
"I don't know what else she could've done, but anything would've been better than nothing."
"My mother loves me," she stated defensively. "She's always done her best for me; she's always given me everything she has."
There was a warning signal in those words, Jim thought. He had to back off the topic of her mother and the accusation that she had done nothing to defend her child…but in his mind it seemed that way, that if Mrs. McKenzie hadn't taken a real stand against the treatment of her daughter then it was like she had condoned it. He couldn't say that aloud however, he wouldn't be able to make Johanna see that. Obviously her mother was her lifeline, the symbol of love and goodness and she wouldn't hear a word against her.
"Is your father always that way?" he asked instead, shifting the topic back to Frank McKenzie. "Does he always treat you badly?"
Johanna sighed and her fingers continued to rub against that emerald stone. She wasn't going to get out this conversation now that it had been started. "My father is a difficult man," she said quietly.
"Sounds like it."
"We've never been close. He's never cared much for me."
Her father had never cared much for her, Jim thought to himself. How was that possible? How could anyone not care for her, especially her own father? How could any parent not care for their child?
"What's his reason for that?"
"I don't know," she said with a light shrug before she picked up her soda and took a long sip. "He's never given me a reason and when pressed for one I always end up being referred to as a 'needy, attention seeking creature'."
Needy, attention seeking creature, that was rich, Jim thought. Frank McKenzie referred to his daughter as a creature. If she was needy and seeking attention then maybe the man should wonder why, maybe he should realize that it was his fault for obviously denying her affection.
"Maybe he didn't want me," Johanna continued on. "Or maybe he had hoped for another boy. I don't know his reasons…I don't even know if he knows his reasons for hating me."
If her father had actually told her that he hated her, Jim was going to go track the man down and punch him in the mouth for it.
"Has he said that to you?"
"No, but I feel like he does. My mother says that he loves me, but I have my doubts."
"Does he ever tell you that he loves you?"
"Rarely," Johanna answered. "I never really believe it."
He couldn't fault her for that. "What about your sister? Does he treat her the same way as he treats you?"
"In some ways he does. I think she gets off a little easier though because she's the baby. She doesn't seem to irritate him as much as I do."
"That's a terrible way to grow up," he commented.
Johanna ran a hand through her hair and looked at him. "I don't want you to think that I had a terrible childhood. I didn't…I had plenty of good times and I have a lot of good memories. My mother and I have always been close and I love my sister and she loves me. It's just where my father is concerned that there's…I don't know what to call it. Regret, maybe?"
"It seems to me that he should be the one with the regrets, Johanna, not you."
"But maybe if I had been better it wouldn't be that way between us. I've tried," she said. "I've tried to make things better, to make him proud of me but I always seem to come up short with the exception of one occasion."
"What occasion was that?"
"When I graduated from law school," she answered, a smile curving her lips and lighting up her eyes a bit although her fingers didn't stray away from her ring. "He was proud of me that day."
"He should be," Jim stated. He didn't know her father but he felt as though it would be easy to hate the man. He'd like to run into him and tell him a few things about his daughter and how lucky he should feel to have her. He'd like to get a hold of her brother too and break his arm for him so he would know how his sister had felt.
Johanna allowed the memory of her graduation to come back to her and how it had felt to have her father's approval for once when she handed him her law degree. He had looked at her with pride…had even told her that he was proud. He had embraced her, kissed her cheek, and called her his little girl. He had taken her, her mother and sister out to dinner and he had even bragged to his friend, who was the owner of the restaurant, about her achievement. During dessert he had pulled a small velvet ring box from his pocket and had handed it to her, telling her it was a gift from him and her mother. She looked down at the emerald ring adorning her right hand. She cherished that ring, it was her reminder that there had been one occasion when he had been proud to call her his daughter. She had cherished that day, because even as she had enjoyed it, she had known it wouldn't last, and it hadn't. By then end of the week he was back to telling her that she didn't have the sense god gave a goose.
"You play with that a lot," Jim said as he gestured to her ring.
She smiled and dropped her fingers away from the stone. "Bad habit."
He laughed softly and took her hand in his. "My mother has that same habit and so does my sister, only she tends to play with her necklace instead of her rings."
"Must be a girl thing," Johanna stated.
"My father says it's a nervous habit," he replied.
"My mother says I tap my foot when I'm nervous."
"I've noticed that," Jim replied.
"Great," she said with a hint of mild sarcasm.
He chuckled, "It's alright, Jo. Everyone has nervous habits, it's no big deal."
"It will be when everyone in the office catches on to it," she remarked. "Then they'll have something else to laugh at."
"Don't pay any attention to them."
"That's easy for you to say."
He supposed that was true. Johanna and every other woman in the building were more open to ridicule than he was.
"Is there a story behind that ring?" he asked, shifting the focus away from her nervous tendencies. He had a feeling about that ring she wore now that he was putting things together and he wanted to see if he was right.
"My parents gave it to me when I graduated from law school."
So he was right, he thought. The ring was associated with her father which was why she toyed with it when she spoke of him.
"It's pretty," he said; not wanting to make her feel self conscience about her habit.
Johanna smiled, "It is, isn't it? My mother has good taste."
"She probably picked it to go with your eyes."
"I don't know about that," she said as she ducked her head somewhat shyly.
"What else has your brother done to you?" Jim asked. "I hope there wasn't anything worse than the broken arm."
"That was the worst," Johanna replied. "The rest was the standard hitting, pushing, and hair pulling type of stuff. See this scar?" she said as she drew her leg up and pointed at her knee.
"Yeah."
"That's a souvenir from when he pushed me and I fell on the ice when I was about 8."
"I guess he didn't get punished for that either," Jim said with undisclosed dismay.
She laughed softly. "My mother yelled at him and made him stay in for the rest of the day. That was like a life sentence for him."
He still looked troubled by what she had told him and she smiled as she covered his hand with her own.
"Weren't you ever mean to your sister?" she asked.
"Not like that," Jim said. "I never caused her to break a bone and I'm pretty sure I never left her with scars and neither did my brothers. I think the worst thing I ever did to Madelyn was when I pushed her into a mud puddle."
"You didn't," she laughed.
Jim grinned at the memory. "I did…it was a big puddle too, she made quite a splash."
"And how old were you when you did this?"
"12," he replied. "She was 10."
"What happened?" Johanna asked. "Did she get even?"
"I was still laughing when she got up; so I wasn't paying much attention and she used that as her opportunity to charge at me and knock me into the puddle."
"That's what you get," Johanna said, her eyes gleaming with mischief.
"I should've known you'd take her side," he laughed.
"Did you get in trouble?"
"Of course. It was the first day of school; we were wearing our new clothes and shoes."
"Oh no," she laughed. "Please tell that this incident occurred on the way home from school."
"It did," he replied. "My mother was livid."
"I'm sure she was," she said before she smiled and added, "I bet you were a cute little boy."
Jim laughed, "And I'm certain that you were an adorable little girl."
"Well now I know where the two of you ran off to," Jeff stated as he approached the bench they were occupying.
"What are you doing here?" Jim asked him.
Jeff gave them a disgruntled look. "That damn Maggie," he stated.
Johanna laughed, "What did she do to you this time?"
"Same thing she always does; leads me on and then turns up her nose and goes off with someone else."
Jim laughed, "Maybe she's playing hard to get."
"Maybe she's trying to make you jealous," Johanna suggested.
"It's not working," Jeff replied.
"Right," Jim scoffed as he shared a look with Johanna.
"She can just keep on being that way," Jeff said, ignoring Jim's comment completely. "I don't need that kind of abuse."
"That's right," Johanna said as she humored him. "You can find some other girl."
"Damn right," he said. "I'm sure there are any number of women who would be thrilled to have me. I ooze charm and sex appeal."
"You've been talking to your mother again, haven't you?" Johanna teased, causing Jim to choke on his soda.
"Ha ha, Sassy," Jeff replied.
"Do to Maggie what she does to you," Jim suggested once he stopped laughing. "See how she likes it."
Jeff considered the idea for a moment, "I could do that."
"Why don't you take Jackie out," Johanna said. "She's crazy about you."
Jeff grinned at her, "You're cute, Sassy. You know that Jackie is just crazy period."
"Well then it'll be a match made in heaven," Jim quipped.
"You know," Jeff said, "If you're not going to be a solution to the problem, than don't bother."
"We're helping. Jo gave you a suggestion."
Their friend grinned mischievously, "I have a suggestion for the two of you."
"Keep it to yourself," Jim told him. "We're not interested. Are we?"
"Nope," Johanna said. "We were just sitting here minding our own business."
"Uh huh," Jeff said. "Sitting here looking nice and cozy together."
Johanna narrowed her eyes at him. "Why don't you try asking Karen to go out with you."
"Oh, changing the subject," Jeff teased.
"Shut up," Jim told him. "Karen's a good choice for you; I hear she's lowered her standards."
"You're just a comedian today too," his friend replied. "What is this, comedy night in the park with Jim and Johanna?"
"Fine," Jim laughed. "If you don't like Karen, go for Melanie."
"Good God," Johanna said as she rolled her eyes. "Don't go out with Melanie."
"Why not?" Jeff asked. "Everyone else does."
"That's exactly why you shouldn't. You're better than that."
"I don't know," Jeff said. "Melanie might be a good choice."
"I guess so if you're looking for something cheap and classless," she retorted.
"I know she can be mean," Jeff said, "But she's not that bad, and besides, beggars can't be choosers."
She rolled her eyes again while Jim smiled to himself as he watched. "Maggie is not going to be bothered if you go out with the tri-state slut. She's just going to think that you're desperate."
"I am!"
"Fine," she said. "Date a slut, I don't care, but don't come crying to me when it blows up in your face."
"Yes, mother," Jeff teased before looking to his best friend. "Maybe Melanie will have a friend for you Jim."
"Surely you wouldn't go out with one of Melanie's friends," Johanna said to him.
"I might," Jim said. "If the offer was intriguing enough."
She gave them both a disgusted look. "I don't even want to hear this. You're both hopeless."
"Jim and I accepted that long ago," Jeff quipped. "It doesn't bother us."
"Apparently," she said as she shifted her attention away from them as they carried on their conversation.
Their voices faded into the background as she focused her attention on a little girl a short distance away. She couldn't have been more than 5, and she was desperately clinging to her ice cream cone as an older boy, who Johanna assumed was her brother, pulled at the bow in her hair and then began to poke and shove her.
Johanna watched intently as the little girl did her best to hold her own against him, but the boy was relentless and eventually he deliberately knocked her ice cream cone out of her hand, causing her to burst into tears, while he smugly held his own cone out of harms way. It could've been a scene from her own childhood. She and Colleen had lost more ice cream cones and candy bars to Frankie than she could count.
She brushed the memories away as she watched the little girl lunge at her brother in an attempt to get even. The boy was quicker, however, and he gave her a hard shove, sending her to the ground. He laughed merrily and then took off, leaving his sister sobbing in the dirt. Johanna's heart broke for her. She sighed and picked up her purse as she rose from the bench.
"Where are you going?" Jim asked; as he had noticed that she had been watching the scene play out.
"I'll be back."
"I bet that little girl is going to get a new ice cream cone," Jeff said as he sat down.
I have that feeling too," Jim commented as he continued to watch Johanna as she approached the little girl. She knelt down in front of her and although he couldn't hear what she was saying, he imagined that she was asking the child if she was okay. They talked for a few moments and then Johanna pulled some tissues from her purse and swiped at the girl's cheeks and hands.
Jim's gaze stayed glued upon them as she helped the girl to her feet and then brushed the dirt and grass off of her legs and dress. She then took on the task of fixing the bow in her hair. They kept talking, and she said something that made the little girl smile widely. Johanna picked up her bag and got to her feet and took the child's hand and led her to the ice cream vendor.
"She's going to make a great mom someday," Jeff remarked as they watched her pay for an ice cream cone that she then carefully handed to the girl.
Jim nodded, "There's no doubt in my mind about that."
Jeff smirked at him, "Keep her in mind when you're looking for someone to be the mother of your children."
"Don't you have somewhere else to be?"
His friend laughed, "Don't worry; I'll let you get back to your alone time with Sassy as soon as I say goodbye to her."
Johanna finally made her way back to them and Jim caught her eye. "Is she okay?"
"She's better now," she answered.
"If I cry will you buy me an ice cream?" Jeff asked.
She smirked at him, "Only if you get punched first."
"Just kidding," he laughed. "That was sweet of you to do."
"Yeah well, little sisters have to stick together."
"What's her name?" Jim asked, because he was sure she had found out.
"Ava," Johanna answered.
"And what did you say to Ava to make her smile the way she did?" Jim inquired.
She smiled, "Just a little advice from one sister to another."
"You're not going to tell us?" Jim stated.
"Nope," she laughed. "It's a secret."
"Well I guess I'll get going," Jeff said. "I'll let you two get back to your date…I mean day."
They both glared at him as he said goodbye and then they settled back into their conversation.
When it came time for the fireworks, Jim and Johanna followed the crowd and moved to a better location. They staked out a place on the grass and settled in for the show. Jim enjoyed watching the bright colors explode against the dark sky, but he also enjoyed watching Johanna as she kept her gaze riveted to the sky.
He couldn't help but smile as he watched her. She had that look of almost childlike glee or her face and it was impossible not to be entranced by it. It seemed as though she could find immense joy in almost anything. He figured that was probably a good thing, especially in light of what she had to put up with in her life.
"What?" she asked when she caught him staring at her.
"Nothing," Jim replied with a slight smile.
She looked at him as though she didn't believe him, but she said nothing as another firework exploded and directed her attention back to the sky.
When the show was over, he took her home, following her inside her apartment to finish the conversation they had started on the drive to her building.
Johanna followed him to the door when he was ready to go, but instead of reaching for the doorknob he turned back towards her.
"That secret sisterly advice you gave to the little girl in the park, was that advice that had been passed on to you?" Jim asked.
She smiled, "Yes, it was something my aunt Bridget told me when I was a kid. She understood what I was going through with Frankie."
"Which side of the family is she on?"
"She's my father's sister. She has horror stories of her own."
"I don't doubt it," Jim said. After what he had heard about her father it didn't come as a surprise to learn that he had been a mean child. Apparently nothing had changed and history had repeated itself in the form of Johanna's brother.
"Are you close to her?" he asked, hoping that she had someone other than her mother and sister in her corner.
"Yeah, we're close," she said with a smile. "Every summer, Frankie, Colleen and I would spend two weeks with her and her family. She has a big house in Long Island. She didn't put up with Frankie's behavior," she added with a laugh.
Jim chuckled, "Did she make him toe the line?"
"Oh yeah; Colleen and I loved it there; we had two weeks of peace from the demon, as we called him."
"Demon sounds fitting," Jim agreed.
Johanna looked thoughtful for a moment. "I think I spent the majority of my breaks from college with Aunt Bridget. After living in the dorm, I wasn't anxious to spend a lot of time living with my father again, even temporarily."
"Do you see her much now?"
"Not as much as I'd like," Johanna answered. "I do talk to her once or twice a week. I told her that I'd be taking a few days off in August and that I'd be out to visit her."
"I bet you're counting the days. I'm sure you'll be happy to get a break from the office."
She grinned, "Well it is nice to get away once in awhile…especially when getting away means I don't have to see people I hate."
He laughed, "Can I go too? I could use a break."
Johanna laughed, "Sure, the more the merrier. Should we take Jeff too?"
Jim shook his head. "No, we'll let him here to fend for himself."
They laughed together and then it grew quiet as they stood there together, glancing at each other as if they were unsure of whether they should say goodnight or not. He didn't know where the urge to hug her came from, but suddenly it was there and he reached for her and pulled her into his arms without hesitation.
"What's this for?" she asked as she sank into the comfort of his embrace.
"Do I have to have a reason?"
"No," Johanna replied. "But if there is one, I hope it isn't pity because I grew up with a horrid brother and an unfeeling father."
"I'm not pitying you. I'd only do that if they had managed to break your spirit, but it's obvious that they haven't."
She smiled as he released her. "Don't pity me because I get picked on at work, either."
'Picked on,' wasn't the term for it, he thought. Harassment was more like it, but maybe it was easier for her to deal with if she thought about it in lesser terms.
"If anyone gives you any problems, you let me know," Jim told her.
Johanna smiled indulgently, "You don't have to fight my battles. I'm a big girl; I can take care of myself."
"I know you can take care of yourself, but that doesn't mean that you have to fight your battles alone…and you're not all that big," he said lightly as he looked at her. She had kicked her shoes off and was now standing a few inches shorter than he was accustomed to.
She smirked at him, "Don't underestimate me. I could beat someone up if I had to."
Jim laughed, "You think so?"
"Hey, I gave Frankie a black eye when I was ten!"
"Did you get in trouble?"
"Yes," she answered with a grin, "But it was so worth it."
"Good for you," he told her proudly. "But beating up a kid is different."
"What?" she said as her brow rose in challenge. "You don't think I can take you?"
"Oh I'm sure you could take me," he said suggestively, allowing his gaze to move over her for added effect.
She blushed and swatted his arm, "I didn't mean it like that."
"I know," he grinned, "But that scenario would be more fun."
She laughed, "I guess it would be, after all, you don't want to get beat up by a girl."
Jim laughed, "You really think you can do it?"
"Of course I can," she stated confidently.
"Alright, go ahead, give me your best shot."
She couldn't keep the smile off her face as she narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you making fun of me?"
"Never," he chuckled. "I'm just giving you a chance, I thought you wanted to fight and prove to me that you could take me on."
Johanna rolled her eyes, "Oh like it would be a fair fight."
"What?"
"We both know I'd win because you wouldn't fight back against me."
"What makes you so sure?"
She looked him in the eye, "Because you're not that kind of guy."
Jim smiled at her. "Who told?" he joked.
Johanna laughed softly, "No one had to tell me, I figured it out all on my own."
"Well if you had told me sooner that you were so confident in your abilities to punch someone, I would've grabbed a hold of Stanley and allowed you to demonstrate on him."
"Don't tempt me like that," she teased.
He laughed, "Maybe we better change your nickname from Sassy to Slugger."
She wrinkled her nose, "No, I don't think so."
"Why not?"
Johanna grinned. "I like 'Sassy'."
"What a coincidence," he replied. "I like her too."
"You know what I mean," she said as her cheeks warmed again.
Jim smiled at her, taking in that blush on her cheeks and that sparkle in her green eyes. He loved her eyes, they were so expressive and beautiful and he knew that it wouldn't take much for him to drown in them if presented with the opportunity.
His fingers reached out without his permission and skimmed her face. "You have beautiful eyes," he said, without really meaning to say it aloud.
"Thank you," she whispered as she smiled softly. "I got my green eyes from my Aunt Bridget."
He chuckled softly, "Does that drive your father crazy?"
Johanna shrugged, "If it does, he's never said anything about it…which is a miracle, because believe me if he has a problem with something, he lets you know."
He did feel sorry for her in the sense that she hadn't grown up with a wonderful father like he did, but he couldn't say anything that even hinted at that. She didn't want pity or sympathy, and he wouldn't offend her by offering it. Instead, he leaned closer and brushed a kiss across her cheek, allowing his lips to linger against her skin.
That action was all it took to bring back those feelings of the night he had kissed her two months before and suddenly he had the urge to do it again. How could he not when he was in such close proximity to her, and she was looking at him as if she were thinking the same thing herself. It wouldn't be wrong would it, he wondered. It wasn't like he kissed her everyday…although he sometimes caught himself thinking about it…thinking about those kisses they had shared that night back in May.
Johanna was holding her breath, hearing Sharon's words ringing in her ears about how once the kissing started it usually continued…not that she minded if it continued, but still there were worries that came attached with it, and she was sure that it was those worries that had them standing so close together, unmoving and hesitating to give into the pull between them. She almost thought that it wasn't going to happen, but then he dipped his head and kissed her lightly, a mere brush of his lips against hers that made her want more. She surprised herself by being bold enough to recapture his lips when he parted from her, bringing him back for a more satisfying kiss that she figured would hold her over for another few months.
It was time to say goodnight, Jim thought to himself once they broke apart. If they didn't, he'd be tempted to stand there all night and kiss her, and that wasn't an urge he should give in to. That urge could lead to another and that was a line they shouldn't cross. He did, however, allow himself to press another kiss to her cheek as he said goodnight.
"Goodnight," she told him as he opened up the door.
"See you tomorrow," he said as he stepped out into the hallway.
Johanna smirked, "Back to work, can hardly wait."
He smiled, "You know where to find me if you need me."
She nodded and then closed the door as he walked away. She was about to go get ready for bed when her phone rang. She had a feeling it was Sharon; she was after all the only one who called her that late in the evening. Sharon probably needed details of her day as a bedtime story. Johanna laughed to herself and by passed the phone. She could've answered it, but it was way more fun to make Sharon wonder where she may be or what she might be doing…and with whom.