Homecoming

Chapter 17: Love In All Its Forms

Having returned from New Rome, there had been an uneasy sense of nervous energy that had settled upon Percy. He seemed to fidget more regularly, yet at the same time seemed more pensive and brooding. For Annabeth, she knew him well enough to know that the situation was born of his need to work out whatever thoughts had plagued him mine, and while she suspected the source of his contemplative thoughts, she respected him enough to give him the time he needed to work out those concerns on his own.

So many people discounted his intelligence. He had said it himself, that he was so often dismissed by his classmates and teachers, yet, his biggest failing was that he had no filter. This of course was largely attributed to his hyperactivity, his inability to stop himself from saying the first thing that would present itself in his mind, yet when he wanted to be serious, when he wanted to work out a problem on his own, he could become as lost in his own mind as Annabeth. It was as if the depths of the ocean dragged him to the bottom, and he was left to work out how to surface.

For Annabeth, she knew the best solution was to let him find his way to his own answer, to navigate the depths of his concerns and find the resolution for himself. It didn't mean that she did not wish he would open up to her, to share his struggles with what was weighing on his mind, but she could not fault him as she was no better at times of her own mental discontent.

Still, Percy was ever charming for the remainder of the visit with Annabeth's family. He would wrestle with her brothers in the backyard, play Monopoly and Life with her family, and at times, work to help Helen in the kitchen preparing lunch or dinner. This was a particularly favorite activity of Percy's, as he had spent so much time fixing and preparing meals with his own mom, that spending time in the kitchen was second nature, and though he would never say this aloud, Helen's meatloaf was even better than his mom's.

Annabeth too, enjoyed preparing food, but this had only recently become a favorite pastime for her. When Percy had gone missing, and Annabeth had spent so much time at the Blofis residence, as way of staving off the worst of the separation caused by Percy's absence, that the blonde demigod had taken to cooking. It had, in many ways, calmed her overactive mind and brought her closer to the woman who loved and treated her like a daughter. But more than that, the guided instructions of measurements and ingredients played to Annabeth's core passions, to build something wonderful with what was available.

So, as the last day of their visit in San Francisco had arrived, Annabeth's family had decided to have a very special final day. While she had chosen to remain in New York for Christmas, her father and step-mother had elected not to open any of the gifts she had sent to them. For that reason, the gifts had remained in her parent's closet since they had arrived, waiting to be unwrapped. While not exactly a 'Christmas in July' type feel, it was still amusing to have a celebration that would extend the season of giving.

Thus, as the family had gathered in the living room, all still in pajamas as was customary, there was a modest pile of presents before them. As always, Annabeth sat beside Percy, her hand in his as she leaned her head against his shoulder. Despite all the gifts being either for or from the daughter of Athena, she did not make any move to distribute them, and so it fell to Bobby and Matthew to collect the presents and hand them out.

Before any of them would open their gifts from Annabeth however, she would relay the importance of the present. "So to begin," she said, pointing to the large box with a smaller package on top for her brothers, she directed them to the smaller present. "Open up that one first." Following her directions, the twins tore the packaging away from the gift, revealing...a book on modern architecture. Disappointment filled their faces as they looked at their sister with feigned enjoyment, earning a laugh from the blonde teen. "Okay, go ahead and open the other present."

With less enthusiasm, the two brothers pealed away the wrapping paper to reveal a large, clear plastic box with designated containers, each filled and color sorted with Legos. "There's over 3,000 Legos in there, and I know it's easy to use the directions when you get a Lego kit, but, thought if you used the pictures to go off of from the architecture book, you could build things just from sight."

"Okay, this made it way cooler Annabeth," Matthew said, a genuine smile on his face.

"Yeah, this is great, thanks." Bobby finished up.

For Helen, her gift was a finely crafted desk organizer with a CD in one of the pull away compartments. "I wasn't sure what to get you Helen, but I remember dad saying you were considering going back into practicing law. So, I thought a desk organizer would help. Also, it was a little tricky, demigods and technology don't mix, but, I managed to download 1,000 prominent court cases and burn them to the CD. They're all organized on types of cases and outcomes, that way you'll have an easy resource to refer to in cases you're presenting."

The effort to construct such a file was so enormous, that Helen was at a loss as to what to say and could only offer a small, watery smile to Annabeth before standing up and walking to the young woman, pulling her into a hug. There had been so much hurt born between the two women for so long, that Helen saw exactly what this gift was. Giving her this present that was so tied to her interests and ambitions, not to mention the copious amounts of work to compile and organize the files was nothing less than an olive branch, and Helen was deeply moved by the offering.

When Helen returned to her seat, Frederic turned over his present and proceeded to unwrap the gift. He looked at the uncertain expression on Annabeth's face, as he finished tearing away the paper. When it was finally unwrapped, he held in his hands a beautifully constructed, yet rustic book. It was bound in worn leather, the binding being three braided cords that threaded through the three holes punctured along the edge of the book. As Frederick opened it, he gasped at the material. "Is this sheepskin?"

"Yeah," his daughter smiled as she ducked her attention from her father's gaze. "I wanted to make it as authentic as I could, but what you have there is a transcribed copy of the original Greek account of the Battle of Thermopylae. I actually had been working on translating it from Camp Half-Blood's archives for the past two years. There's actually only two copies, one of them is going in our library," she said, turning her attention to Percy and offering a smile before looking back to her father, "and I wanted you to have the other one."

"Well...sweetheart, I don't know what to say," he said, pausing to remove his glasses to wipe at his eyes at the historic treasure he had been given. "Thank you."

As Percy continued to sit on the couch, he seemed to withdraw even further from the festivities. In his own mind, he felt like an outsider intruding upon a private family celebration, which, he reminded himself, was foolish as he was engaged to Annabeth. This would eventually be his family as well, but Annabeth's time with her father, step-mother and half-brothers were few and far between, and in some recess of his mind, he could not resolve the feeling that he was invading upon that rarely shared private time.

Beyond that however was the underlining crux of what had bothered Percy since returning from New Rome. As he sat there with a shallow smile, watching Bobby and Matthew tear open the box of Legos and begin building with the construction blocks, Percy leaned over, kissed Annabeth on the cheek and made his way from the room.

At his departure, Annabeth followed his retreating form with her eyes, a look of confused concern furrowing her brow while she chewed nervously at her bottom lip. Her eyes were not the only ones to follow Percy however, as Frederic watched the younger man's departure, his attention shifting to his daughter while a mask of hesitant comprehension fixed itself to his face.

"It's about lunchtime," Frederic stated as he looked at his family, his eyes however holding on his daughter as he offered a small smile of understanding. "What do you say he eat before giving Annabeth her presents from us?"

As Matthew and Bobby grabbed the box of Legos and headed for the basement, naturally leaving the book behind, Annabeth rose to follow Percy. As Frederic gathered up the wrapping paper, Helen made her way into the kitchen, stopping short when she saw Annabeth standing at the sink that overlooked the backyard. Seated in one of the outdoor chairs was Percy, his attention fixed on the horizon.

The view from the Chase's backyard was, in a word, mesmerizing. Their house was close enough that the Bay was easily visible from their yard, and at night, the sunset would make the water glow like it was on fire. It was a scenic view that Frederic himself could not deny he would lose himself in. As it was only nearing one in the afternoon, it was still picturesque, watching sailboats and yachts traverse the water in their slow, lazy path up the channel.

As Helen entered the kitchen, seeing Annabeth transfixed at staring out window, her eyes tracked her step-daughter's attention to the young man in the lounge chair. Pursing her lips uneasily, as though not sure how to proceed, she approached the young demigod and rested her hand on her shoulder.

There would have been a time when Annabeth would had rejected such a show of support from her. In truth, there would have been a time when Helen would not even offer it, and that understanding made her feel bitterly angry with herself. She knew she was the reason Annabeth had felt unloved as part of their family, had run away from home. That her being pregnant with the twins had made this remarkable young woman feel like was being replaced, and Helen had hated that she had done little to dissuade that belief.

"I hope we didn't make him feel uncomfortable," she said, her tongue lancing forward to moisten her lips in a nervous habit. She had realized halfway through the gift sharing that Percy was not included in any of the presents they had exchanged, and for Helen, she was reminded of how she had excluded Annabeth in so much of their early interactions that she could not help but question if she had inadvertently dismissed Percy as being part of their lives now that he was engaged to Annabeth.

"What? No, no it's not that," Annabeth responded, her attention turning towards the older woman before quickly returning to her focus on Percy. "He's...well, since returning from New Rome, he's scared."

"What of?" her father asked from her other side. She had been so focused on Percy's well being that she had not even heard his approach. She cursed herself for that lapse of attention. For so many years she had trained herself to be ever observant of her surroundings lest she be attacked when she let her guard down, and here she was, startled as her mortal father approached her without her knowing. "Sorry," replied at her reaction, only to have her shake her head in response.

"No, it's okay," a small, if not forced laugh slipped past her lips. Turning back towards the young man, she fixed her gaze upon the one who was most precious to her in the entire world. She understood why he would stare out at the sea, or the ocean for hours on end while trying to work out in his mind what was troubling him. Even if he felt rejected and abandoned by Poseidon, the sea still called to him and would placate his troubles more often than not.

After a moment of considering how to answer, she replied. "He's worried we've plateaued. Arriving at New Rome pretty much confirmed it. I mean, don't get me wrong, seeing Frank and Hazel again was great," she paused as she realized she had never mention the two praetors to her father and stepmother. "They are, uh...friends of ours who journeyed with us to Greece. Anyway, they had offered us treatment at a doctor's office, a psychiatrist who specialized in demigod PTSD.

"They didn't mean it, but it was kind of a slap in the face to Percy and me. We had been trying so hard to dig our way out of everything we've had to deal with, and yet, even with the promise of a new life in a city that would keep us safe, it was thrown in our face how emotionally fragile everyone still thinks we are. Maybe we can't see it because we're too close to it, I don't know...but everyone who knew us before we fell into that hell act like we're complete strangers to them, that we're different people from who we were. And that scares me dad, it really does."

Frederic was silent a moment as he stared at his daughter, a great sense of pain swelling within him, yet, at the same time, a sense of relief. He had never known her to let her guard down, to let him see her this vulnerable, and despite how shameful he felt to feel some measure of joy that had trusted him with this knowledge, it was there all the same. Reaching his hand to cover hers, she only realized at that moment that she was gripping the sink so tightly her knuckles had turned white.

"Trauma is not something that can just be brushed aside," he said, pausing as he considered his words before continuing. "It can't have been easy for you, the quests, the missions, the wars, and...I don't think...I didn't do a very good job helping did I?

"I had hoped, well, I'm not really sure actually, but I wanted to try to make everything as normal for you as I could. Ignore the demigod part of your life without realizing how much of your life that truly was. I'm sorry for that..."

"So am I," Annabeth responded, her attention turning once more to the young man in the backyard. "Because I really wish I could just be normal. To live a normal life without looking over my shoulder every minute of every day. To be with the man I love without fear that some new earth shattering quest requires us and he's again ripped out my life. To not have everyone look at us like they don't know who we are anymore."

Turning quickly to her father, she fixed her eyes upon him, as if gauging his perspective, and try as she might, she could not prevent the guarded expression dawning upon her visage, as though she expected him to reject her again. After a moment of silent scrutiny of her father, she dropped her gaze before once more turning to stare out the window. "I just wish we could get past all this. That's the reason we chose to get engaged so early you know," she said, dropping her eyes back to her left hand and fixing her attention on the glittering ring on her left ring finger. "A promise for the future. Something for us to hold onto when the memories of everything become too hard to fight." A hitch in her voice revealed how hard she was struggling to hold it together, to keep her emotions in check. Part of her emotional restraint was that she was uncomfortable revealing how emotionally damaged she was, how weak she felt, particularly in front of her father. Another part of the restraint was anger at the unwitting acceptance that everyone who had questioned them about the fragility of their state of minds were right. The nightmares and panic attacks, for the most part, had become manageable, and yet, the anxiety and fear had only intensified.

And yet, the largest reason she had restrained her emotions was because she knew Percy would need her and she did not want to be unavailable for him. It was a delicate seesaw of emotional dependency they shared, relying on one another to support them during the worst of it. Today, she would support him, tomorrow, their roles would be reversed.

As she fixed her eyes on her fiance, her father had placed his hand upon the nape of her neck and gently pulled her towards him as he pressed a kiss against her temple. For a moment he stood there, proud of the woman his daughter had become, and yet remiss over the knowledge of how much of her life he had not been a part of. But as Percy had told him, she was here because she wanted to be, and he took some measure of comfort in that.

"You know," he began, softly if not a bit awkwardly, "I have counseled many soldiers dealing with trauma and the after effects of war. I know I'm not in a position to say this, but, it might be helpful to talk to someone about all this, you and Percy both. And, well...if you're not comfortable discussing it with a stranger, then maybe..." he said, allowing the invitation to hang in the air.

For her own part, the thought appealed to Annabeth. If nothing else, they would be living in New Rome, a mere twenty minutes from her family's home. Perhaps more than one door would open when she and Percy moved here in a few months. But that was the future, and for now she needed to focus on the young man seated in the deck chair in that backyard.

"Do you want to go talk to him?" Frederic asked, as if afraid he was perhaps keeping his daughter from her true goal of speaking to her fiance, only for her to shake her head.

"He's not ready yet," she said, a slight smile pulling the edges of her lips upward as a sense of serenity filled her continence. It was so amazing to consider how well she knew her precious Percy that she could identify with his posture what mood he was in. As she continued to watch, the shift was subtle, nearly impossible to perceivable, yet she witnessed the slight shift in his shoulders, the tension relaxing, just marginally, letting her know he had come to his own understanding.

Moving towards the back door, Annabeth paused and turned towards her father and stepmother, providing an uneasy, yet hopeful smile and said, "Thanks dad," before heading out the door.

As she made her way to where Percy sat, she flexed her fingers to ease her own tension before coming to stand beside him, her left hand resting upon his right shoulder. He did not so much as look at her, rather simply moved to take her hand in his and bring it to his lips, his kiss lingering on the ring on her hand.

When he had pulled away, he craned his head to look at her, his hand giving a slight jerk, indicating his desire for her to join him. He did not need voice his intentions, nor did she need to ask, they simply knew each other so well they could read the others intent through facial cues. Moving around the chair, Annabeth positioned herself to sit upon Percy's lap, the young man moving forward to rest his head against her chest as he looped his arms around her waist. Likewise, Annabeth placed one hand at the small of his back while the other threaded his hair, her nails scratching his scalp in comfort.

She had quickly come to understand that this was his favorite position, to be held in her arms and comforted from the storm of his emotions. Likewise, her own favorite place was very similar to his. In bed at night, she would rest with her head on his chest, listening to his heartbeat to comfort the worst of her fears. It was very telling that they could only find safety and peace in the arms of each other...for they were the only ones who could make them feel safe.

"I feel so old," Percy said at last, not needing to be prompted from his lover to voice the depths of his pain. "I realized it when we were touring New Rome, but...if you subtract the six months Hera had me in a coma, you and I defeated Kronus on my 16th birthday, and we defeated Gaea before I turned 17. That's two wars, not to mention everything else we did, all within a year. I just...I feel like an old man trapped in a young man's body."

"I know," she said simply, pressing her lips to his forehead before resting her cheek against his hair. "I feel it too. Emotionally, physically...mentally, I feel drained. But you said it yourself Percy, it took a lot of time to collect this baggage, it'll take a long time to unpack it all."

A sighed slipped past his lips as he tightened his hold on her, his eyes closing in comfort of having her so near. "I know," he responded, yet the frustration was ever present. Annabeth had always been more patient than him, and yet even she was defeated in knowing that, despite all their work, everyone around them could tell how emotionally fractured they were.

"Why do you think she did it...really?" Percy asked, voicing the true nature of what he had been dealing with since their return from New Rome. For Annabeth, she did not need to know who Percy was referring to, the question had been plaguing her mind as well.

"Honestly, I think it was an escape," she said simply, redoubling her efforts to comb her fingers through Percy's hair as she too tightened her embrace. "Piper was the emotional center of our group, and she and I became such good friends, but, she was always closest to Leo and Jason. Then, at the climax of the war, Leo dies. That was hard for all of us, but I think it was hardest for Jason and Piper. They started their journey together.

"After a while, she started questioning whether what she had with Jason was truly founded on love and adoration, or a manipulation of the gods. She couldn't distinguish between her own feelings and what the gods made her believe she felt. It didn't help that her own power was born of the same manipulative powers used against her."

"You seem to have a pretty good insight about this..."

"Yeah, well, she pretty much told me all of this before she broke up with Jason," Annabeth said hesitantly.

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"What was there to say? I told her I thought she was making a mistake. That everything she and Jason had experienced after they started dating had been true...but, well, you know who her mom is."

"Aphrodite?"

"She loves her drama, and her tragic love stories. I never told you when Hazel, Piper and I met her at Battery Park. She went on and on, waxing poetic about the American Civil War as if it were a painting in the Louvre. I honestly suspect she was influencing Piper's decision to break up with Jason."

"That's sick," Percy said, though his voice was soft as if afraid the goddess of love would hear his slight and ruin what he and Annabeth had.

'That's Aphrodite,' Annabeth thought, but likewise, kept the words to herself lest the goddess smite her, or worse, destroy her relationship with Percy. "Regardless, she broke up with Jason, then, he still dies protecting her. She couldn't handle the guilt...so, she used her power to erase her memory of what happened."

"Just like that?"

"Is it so hard to believe? You knew you were a demigod for five years before we even fought in the Battle of Manhattan, Piper was thrown into a world saving quest with no warning or preparation. Same with Leo. Why do you think he moved to Chicago after he came back? He had no ties to Camp Half-Blood. And then Leo, well, he never got to see Jason before he died. I think, knowing Piper like I do, or, did...she probably felt guilty about that too."

"Leo wouldn't have blamed Piper for Jason's death."

"Maybe," Annabeth said as she shrugged her shoulders, "but that doesn't mean she wouldn't want to be blamed for it."

"What? I don't understand why..."

"Yes you do Percy," she said softly, her hand against his back now working to draw designs against his shirt. She smiled slightly at the shiver her actions elicited from the young man. "Remember when I told you that Piper reminded me of you, that's why we got along so well. Do you honestly think, if you felt you were responsible for someone's death, you wouldn't want people to hate you for it? Because it would justify your feelings of guilt?

"After I found out about Jason, I tried to reach out to her, wanted to see how she was doing...but she never answered any of my messages, never returned any of my calls. I think she was afraid I was going to tell her 'I told you so,'."

"You'd never say that, that's not who you are..."

"I know," she answered, a small smile forming on her lips at the trust her fiance had in her. "She knew that too, but honestly, I think she'd want me to say it, because it would justify all the guilt she felt. That's just a theory though."

Percy would never understand how she could put together such a reasonable hypothesis based simply on conjecture. It amazing him how adapt her mind was to navigate any situation and made him respect her all the more fully every time it was on full display. "That's quite a 'theory' for just piecing together her motives."

"Not really," Annabeth replied, drawing a deep breath and diving into the heart of her idea. "I just substituted you for Piper and paralleled her motives with what you would have done."

"What?" He asked, pulling away to look her fully in the eye. "I'd never..."

His words were silenced however as her fingers covered his lips. "Lee, Michael, Charlie, Selena, Jason...Bob and Damasen, do you know how many times I hear you mutter their names in your sleep, asking them to forgive you? I've said it over and over Percy, it wasn't your fault. But you've got to let it go, because that guilt is a parasite, look what it did to Piper."

For a moment, Percy looked as if he had been slapped before his face eased back into its usually stoic mask. "Fine, but the same goes for you, and don't tell me you don't hold the same guilt..."

Opening her mouth to protest, Annabeth slowly closed it as she seemed to deflate upon herself, her forehead coming to rest against Percy's shoulder. "Everyone's right, gods I thought we were getting better, but we still have so much more to go, don't we?"

Percy didn't answer, but simply kissed the top of her head before resting his cheek against her hair. After several minutes of simply holding each other, a smile started to form upon his lips. "You know," he began, his voice cutting through the silence as he held her just a little tighter. "Prom is coming up in a couple of weeks..."

"Are you actually asking me to prom?" She replied, sitting up to look him fully in the eyes.

"Gods no, the last dance we went to...well, let's just say I'm not in any mood to go to a school dance, but, thinking about it, there's no reason we can't have our own prom."

Arching an eyebrow at the suggestion, she pursed her lips in consideration. "What, you mean like tuxes and dresses and everything?"

"Nah, don't think that's really our style. But, we can make our prom whenever we want...like right now," he smiled at her scrutinized expression before tapping her thigh, a sign for her to move. As she stood up, eyebrow arched in curiosity, he stood to take her hand and move her to the middle of the backyard, where he placed one hand on her hip while taking her hand in his other. Smiling at his antics, she draped her free arm over his shoulder before moving closer to him.

"You're such a goof," she laughed, leaning her head against his shoulder.

"Shh, they're playing our song," he said, changing positions so that both arms encircled her waist while she moved her other arm over his shoulder. They had no idea how long they had remained like that, holding each other and swaying gently to their own rhythm, buffeted between how far they had come and how much that had still to traverse.

Still, for this moment, a rest stop upon their journey, it was enough.

A/N

Well, this chapter took a different turn. I felt I didn't give explanation enough to why, in my mind Piper would use her powers on herself and effectively erase herself as a demigod. Hope this was a bit more clear. But also, this brings up another point that will come up later, what do demigods get from their godly parents? Already within this story, Jason's death, Thalia and Nico having their own PTSD, while not made clear but will be addressed, Frank and Hazel both dealing with guilt that they couldn't save their friends (Annabeth and Percy falling into Tartarus, Piper's guilt over Jason's death, and of course, Jason)

Anyway, I do hope the chapter was good. As always, if you are kind enough to read, please be kind enough to drop a review, favorite, follow...they're all appreciated.

Thank you