Reflections

by evitascarlett

A companion piece to 'Apologize'. Chronicling the lives and love story of Jim and Johanna Beckett through the years. See Authors Note at the beginning of Chapter One for more details! Cover art by LordofKavaka

66. Chapter 66 - The Demand Pt 2

Author's Note: Thanks for your reviews! Sorry for the delay; life got very stressful. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

Chapter 66- The Demand-Part 2

Jim watched Johanna push away thoughts and discussion of her father's demand all of Friday and Saturday; despite her mother's multiple phone calls imploring her to come to dinner on Sunday. She wouldn't give Naomi a straight answer; merely an unreadable "we'll see" before conjuring up some excuse to end the call. He could tell that she was doing everything possible to keep Frank McKenzie off her mind…and he had a feeling that she had been trying to keep the whole thing off his mind too. They had gone out Friday night and she had kept the conversation away from any topic that might lead to the discussion of her father's demand. He had allowed her to get away with it; not wanting to spoil their date night. When Saturday arrived, she threw herself into their Christmas shopping adventure for gifts for the nieces and nephews and when they had gotten home, she had plunged into decorating her Christmas tree and her apartment with just as much zeal. He hadn't wanted to ruin the fun she seemed to be having…didn't want to put a damper on her building Christmas excitement.

He couldn't help thinking though that she hadn't really given him many opportunities to bring up the topic of that Sunday dinner demand…he was pretty sure she hadn't stopped chattering and rambling about one subject or another since they had left work Friday afternoon. For the past two days she had driven the conversations…and now that Jim thought about it, there had been the slightest hint of desperation as she had done so; as if she had feared the moment he'd want to speak of it. The moment was here, however, he thought to himself. It was now Sunday afternoon and she was lounging on the couch in her nightgown with the store ads from the newspaper; a sudden quietness about her being that hadn't been present the past forty-eight hours.

The conversation was going to have to be forced; Jim knew that…and he wasn't all that big on the idea; he knew she wouldn't like it and he wouldn't like ruffling her feathers but it had to be done. "What time do we have to be at dinner tonight?" he asked.

Johanna glanced up from the ad she had been looking at. "Are we going?"

Jim scooped up the ads that were lying on the sofa and tossed them onto the coffee table so that he could join her. "We were invited."

"No; we were summonsed."

"Well, as attorneys we know the penalty for ignoring summonses; don't we?"

"Legally yes; but I don't think my father has found a way to file charges against me yet…although I'm sure he's probably wished he could at times but anyway; we don't have to do it."

"I'm willing to go," he stated; "I've been willing…you're the one who keeps dancing around it."

"I'm not dancing around it!"

"Yes you are, Johanna. Now it's time to get it over with and since you don't want to make the decision; I'll make it for you. We're going."

His fiancée gave him a hard look, he could see the storm rising within her, the flicker of defiance at being told what she was going to do and he braced himself for whatever she was going to verbally throw at him in response. She licked her lips, her green eyes glittering with coolness as he held her gaze. "So," she said; "You put a ring on my finger and now you make all the decisions; is that right?"

Jim schooled himself to wait a long moment before responding; making himself choose his words carefully because she was coming for a fight. She didn't like being told what to do; not by her father and not by him…not by anyone when it came down to it. He had to be careful; he had to handle this right. Slowly he reached for her hand, not surprised when she didn't let curl her fingers around his hand or turn her palm to press against his. He swiped his thumb across her knuckles softly and met her eye. "No; sweetheart," he said gently; "That isn't the case at all. I'm not the boss of you because I put a ring on your finger…I'll never be the boss of you; I'd be a fool to try and control you and bend you to a will that's not your own. We're a team…and we're always going to be a team; but if a decision needs to be made and you're unwilling to make that decision with me; then I have to be the one to do it. You've been putting off this meeting with your father for awhile now; and I understand that the whole idea of it upsets you because of how things are between the two of you; but we can't avoid it anymore. I know you don't like the way this is coming about; I know you wanted to control the when and where and now he's taken that from you by demanding it to happen today…but, Jo; if it's left up to you, the day is never going to be right for it; the stars never lined up quite right…so I have to do it for you…for us. If you want to get mad at me, you can; but we're going."

Johanna said nothing but he kept his eyes on her, watching the play of emotions sweep across her face until finally her jaw tightened and she looked away. "Fine," she stated.

He squeezed her hand and remained quiet; suddenly recalling that Robert Beckett always made it a point to remind his sons that when a woman said something was fine, it wasn't…it so wasn't fine. "You know I wouldn't make you do something you didn't want to do unless I absolutely had to, right?" he asked.

"Sure," she replied; her gaze flicking back to the ad she still held.

Great, Jim thought to himself as he squeeze the back of his neck with his unoccupied hand; they had gone from 'fine' to 'sure'…another word he was certain he had been warned about. The question was; why hadn't his father given any tips for getting out of these 'fine' situations? Perhaps the blunt approach would be best; after all, she always said she valued honesty. "Listen, I know you wanted to do this on your own terms but we have an opportunity and we're taking it. I'm tired of waiting and tired of watching you twist yourself into knots about it every time the issue comes up. The longer we wait; the more you defy him, the worse it's going to be; so we're going and get it done."

Johanna gave a soft huff of exasperation. "I said fine, what more do you want?"

"For you not to say 'fine'!" he exclaimed.

Puzzlement furrowed her brow. "You don't want me to be fine?"

"Not that kind of 'fine'."

"Jim; what the hell are you going on about?"

"I've been warned about that word," he answered. "My father has always said that woman says something is fine, it isn't."

"Well it isn't totally fine but I don't have much choice about this," Johanna answered. "I'm going to get it over with so both of you will leave me alone about it."

"Both?" he repeated.

"You and my father."

"So we're being lumped into the same category today?"

"Seems that way."

"I'm not sure how I feel about that," Jim remarked.

She shrugged. "That's alright; I don't feel too great about some things myself."

"I know," he said; "But it'll be fine. I'm sure your mother will have a word with your father."

Johanna smiled. "Oh, honey; if you only knew how many words my mother has had with my father only to end up utterly disappointed by the end of whatever event she trained him for."

"It's not going to be that bad; you'll see."

"Mhmm, we'll see," she replied. "Believe me, Jim; I hope you're right. I don't want this to be a disaster; I don't want him to be a jerk, I don't want to have to dread this…but I am dreading it and there's nothing I can do about it. I'll feel better once it's over…at least I hope so. I guess it depends on how it goes."

He leaned closer and pressed a kiss to her lips. "We'll make it."

Before she could reply; the phone rang and she sighed deeply. "I'm getting a feeling that it's your mother again," he said quietly as if the woman could hear him.

"Yeah, I have that feeling too," she replied as she reached over the arm of the couch and picked up the receiver. "Hello."

"Are you up, dear?" Naomi said on the other line.

"Yes; I've been up since ten," Johanna answered. "Do you need me to get you something?"

"No; I just wanted to make sure you up and moving around; when I talk to you when you're half asleep I'm not sure if you're hearing everything or if I'm just lulling you like when you were a baby."

"I'm awake, Mom."

"Good; now about tonight…"

"Have I ever told you that sometimes it feels like you've started the conversation without me?" Johanna asked.

"No; but your brother's mentioned it," Naomi replied; "And I say you're both crazy; if I have a reason for starting a conversation that way, chances are my children know why; isn't that right?"

She rolled her eyes. "I suppose."

"Don't roll your eyes at me," her mother stated.

"I didn't roll my eyes," she lied; "And even if I did, how do you know; you're on the phone, you can't see me."

"I don't need to see you to know; I'm your mother; I know what your voice sounds like when you're rolling your eyes. Now stop it."

Johanna breathed deeply. "So you were saying?"

"That's more like it," Naomi remarked. "Now; about tonight; I'm trying to decide what to make. I don't want to make ham because we're having that for Christmas and all the turkey leftovers are gone; not that I'd serve leftovers on an important night like this. Do you have any suggestions; something you and Jim would like to have?"

"I didn't say I was coming."

"You're coming," her mother said with conviction.

"Am I?"

"Yes; you wouldn't want to disappoint your mother and hand her a reason to harp at you all the way into the New Year and perhaps even past that date, now would you?"

"No; not at all."

"That's what I thought. Dinner is at five as it always is on Sundays, just in case you needed a reminder but I'm still wondering what to make."

"Cook whatever you want, Mom."

"You're no help at all. I want to make something you want so you'll feel better about this."

She rolled her eyes again; leave it to her mother to think food would make the difference. "I'm happy with whatever you make."

Naomi sighed in exasperation. "Does Jim like lasagna? I think I remember him saying that once; it was him wasn't it? I know it wasn't Paul."

"Yes; he likes lasagna; and yes he told you that before."

"Good; I'll make lasagna. Try to be on time, dear; you know how your father hates it when people are late."

"Yeah; I know," she said flatly; "Sometimes it really isn't my fault though."

"I know that; but since tonight is important; start getting ready a little earlier than usual; alright?"

"Yes, Mother."

"Don't call me mother!" Naomi exclaimed. "You know I hate that."

"I know," Johanna replied; "But why should I be the only one to suffer today?"

"I'm going to let it pass this time, Johanna Elizabeth; but only because I know you're nervous about bringing Jim over to meet your father and that being nervous makes you a bit snippy."

"I'm sorry," she said automatically; her mother's tone and usage of her middle name conjuring up the learned behavior of her youth.

"I know, darling," Naomi replied; her tone softer. "It's going to be fine; I won't let things get out of hand. You have my word; it's going to be fine."

"I guess we'll see," she murmured.

"Trust me, Bambina," her mother implored. "I'll let you go now and I'll see you at dinner. I love you."

"I love you too," she stated before ending the call.

"All set?" Jim asked once the phone was hung up.

"Yes; and we're having lasagna as you've probably gathered."

Jim smiled. "I'm glad to hear that, I like it. What's for dessert?"

"No word on that; hopefully nothing and the evening can end early."

"I don't think your mother would do that…she's the dessert serving type of hostess."

Johanna blew out a breath. "You're probably right about that…we'll just hope it's a quick dessert."

His fingertips brushed her cheek. "It'll all be over in a few hours, sweetheart; just relax."

She smiled; hoping it didn't look like a smirk as she thought to herself "easier said then done."

---

"How does this look?" Johanna asked later that afternoon as she studied her dress in the mirror.

"It's pretty," Jim said for what he was sure was the third time that day.

"It's not too fancy?" she asked; her fingers fluttering against the neckline of her burgundy dress.

"How can it be fancy when it's a solid color with no decoration, not much of a neckline, comes down to your knees and you've got sleeves. Basically it's one step and a veil away from a nun's habit."

Johanna pinned him with a glare. "And yet you said it was pretty."

"You look beautiful in anything; you know that."

"How can I look beautiful in something that you clearly don't like?"

"I like it."

"You said it's a nun's habit."

"I was just proving that it wasn't fancy," Jim replied.

"Don't lie to me when I ask your opinion of something. I deal with enough liars at work," Johanna said as she unzipped the dress and pulled it off.

"Oh God; are you changing again!" he exclaimed. "We're going to be late at the rate you're going."

"It's not like they don't expect it!" she retorted; despite her mother's warning on the phone. "I'm always late. I was even born late; and yes, I'm changing my clothes again! If you're so damn anxious to get there; go without me!"

Jim smiled a little. "Do you feel better now that you've yelled at me a little?"

"No; I won't feel better until you know there's nothing for you to look forward to tonight when we get home. How do you feel now?"

"Devastated," he replied without missing a beat; "Especially since you're standing in front of me half dressed. Is there any chance we can have some mediation on that and come to a better agreement?"

"Nope."

"Then my devastation continues," Jim said lightly. "I hope I can carry on after terrible news like that."

"That'll teach you to mind your manners," she stated; her gaze upon her wardrobe once more.

"Why is it suddenly a big deal about what you wear?" he asked. "You usually go in jeans so I'm not sure why we're going through this big production here. We had to go through this at Thanksgiving which I chalked up to being because we were going to my parents house…but these are your parents and they're used to looking at you. You don't have to impress them."

Johanna turned away from the closet, a hand on her hip. "Get out of my room, now!"

"You look really cute when you stand like that," he couldn't help but reply with a suggestive smile.

"Get out!"

"If I leave who will tell you how you look in dress number four?"

"Just go," she huffed. "Nothing's ever serious unless it's about you."

"That's not true, Johanna. You're just making a big deal out of nothing. Did you ever think that maybe some of the friction between you and your father is because you're both too stubborn for your own good? You're both set in your ways…and those ways might be a bit similar. Maybe you're too much alike in that respect and it causes a bit of friction."

Her green eyes blazed with fire. "Don't you ever say that to me again! I'm nothing like him!"

"Are you sure about that? Because I know your mother has mentioned it," he said as he moved to the closet and pulled out a white dress that had a pattern of small blue flowers on it and held it out to her.

Johanna took the dress from him and tossed it on the floor with the other discarded dresses, defiance written across her face as she did so. "I'm positive; we have absolutely nothing in common," she said firmly as she reached for a long sleeved periwinkle blue dress that she deemed cute and yet modest…and had admittedly bought because it reminded her of a dress that Mary Richards had worn on an episode of Mary Tyler Moore. If it was good enough for Mary, it was good enough for her…and that meant it better be acceptable for Frank McKenzie without any of his 'too fancy, too expensive' comments.

"You never answered my question," Jim said; figuring it was best to drop the topic of her sharing an ounce of Frank's genes. "Why is your wardrobe so important all of a sudden?"

She frowned slightly. "My father hates it when I look fancy."

"I didn't know you walked around in ball gowns and tiaras," he replied.

"In his mind, silk blouses and tailored looking blazers and skirts are fancy and too expensive…if he only knew how much Mom really spends on her clothes. He still doesn't know that she's an expert at changing the numbers on the price tag. He gets up in arms about anything he deems frivolous; God forbid I walk in with a designer purse. He really hates designer handbags; he says they're a waste of money."

"It's your money; you can spend it how you please."

"Exactly; but he still makes his opinion known."

Something about the sudden quietness of her tone silenced him and Jim merely watched as she slipped into the dress she had chosen. He moved behind her and zipped it without being asked; his hand brushing against her back in a small show of comfort when he finished the task. "You look beautiful," he told her when she turned to move to her vanity to put on her makeup and jewelry.

"Thank you," she murmured. "You look very handsome."

"Not too fancy?" he teased lightly. "I don't want your father accusing me of overspending."

A genuine smile broke across her lips. "No; you look perfect…I always like when you wear your black suit; and that dark blue shirt makes your eyes look even bluer…and I do adore your blue eyes."

Jim smiled at her reflection in the mirror as he stepped behind her and pressed a kiss against the top of her head as she sat on the bench seat of her vanity. "Will you wear your hair down for me?" he asked quietly.

"Just for you," she replied softly.

He ran his fingers through her hair for a few moments as she slipped on her bracelet and picked up her necklace. She seemed to settle deep into her thoughts and he thought that maybe it was best to leave her to it…maybe she needed to prepare herself before they left. Maybe a little space would settle her and her nerves. He pressed another kiss against her head and then grabbed his suit jacket from the chair and picked up his shoes.

"I'll watch TV while you finish getting ready," he told her. "Take your time…we've still got awhile before we'd be considered late."

Johanna managed a wobbly smile for him. "I'll be ready soon, I promise."

He gave her a nod and left the room; leaving her to her thoughts and her queasy stomach. She sighed as she picked up her tube of lipstick; wishing she could will her headache away…wishing she could be numb about the whole idea of the coming evening. Things would be so much easier if she could just be numb when it came to Frank McKenzie…and she swore to herself that one day, she'd learn to accomplish that feat…it just wouldn't be today.

---

Johanna's foot tapped nervously the entire drive over, tension written in every line of her body as she kept her gaze on the scenery outside the window. She was quiet…too quiet in Jim's opinion. He was used to her chatter or the soft way she'd sing along with the radio without thought; but this evening hit after hit played on the radio and she didn't join in. She also didn't seem to be in a chatty mood; he was sure she had only spoken a handful of words since finally deciding on her wardrobe and it seemed out of place when she had spent the whole weekend chattering to keep this moment at bay…but now that it was here she was silent. She was locked tightly inside her mind and he was positive that she was conjuring up every bad thing that could happen once they stepped through her parents door. It didn't take a genius to figure out that this was the last thing she wanted to do; that she felt cornered and that someone had taken away her control over the situation. Jim sighed; he didn't want her to be a bundle of nerves; he could handle whatever was thrown at him…but Johanna was filled with worry despite his assurances that he could handle this.

Her foot continued to tap against the floor mat and he turned up the radio a little more to drown it out as they stopped for a light. He couldn't stand the constant tapping…and he couldn't stand her silence even more.

"Jo," he said, his gaze flicking toward her quickly.

She said nothing, her eyes still focused on the world outside the passenger side window.

"Jo," he said again.

She flinched as his voice finally pulled her from her thoughts. "Hmm?"

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah; why?" she asked.

"Because you're too quiet and you look like you could throw up," he said honestly.

"Well that goes with the territory of feeling like I could throw up," she remarked.

There was a slight edge to her tone and he tried to wade cautiously into the murky waters of the battle that seemed to be swirling inside of her. "You don't need to be so upset about this," he said gently. "It's not a big deal; it had to happen sooner or later."

"I wanted it to be on my terms; not his; you know that; you even said it yourself earlier today."

"Well, Jo; honestly, I think if it was left up to you I wouldn't meet him until the day of the wedding and that would be a bit awkward."

Her narrowed gaze flicked toward him. "Go ahead; take his side, you men all stick together."

"I'm not taking his side," he replied. "I just wish you weren't so uptight about this. I know you don't get along with him but it shouldn't put you in this state about one dinner. It's going to be fine; relax."

"I'm relaxed," she retorted.

"Really?" Jim asked; his brow rising; "Then could you stop tapping your foot? It's driving me crazy. It's not so bad when you're talking, you drown it out but when you're being quiet it's…well, it's just not necessary. Your father isn't the first father I've met you know. I have met the fathers of other women."

"Pardon me," Johanna replied; "I didn't realize you were a seasoned pro. Tell me, just how many women have there been? Is there anything I need to know? How many of these women were you engaged to? Do you have any secret children out there?"

Jim blew out a breath. "Okay; first of all; don't make it sound like a harem of women has passed through my life. Second; you're the only woman I've ever been engaged to; and third, I have no secret children…the only woman I seem to take chances with in that area is you; which should back up my claim that you're the only woman I ever wanted to marry. Anything else?"

"You didn't say how many there have been."

"Are we really going to go there?" he asked. "And to be clear, which list do you want; the list of whose parents I've met or the list of how many women I've been with?"

"Either will suffice," Johanna replied. "Here, I'll start off. I've only met the parents of five people I've dated."

"Alright, Jo; if you want to play that game; how many of those five people have you slept with?" he asked.

Her jaw tightened. "Three."

"Three?" he repeated.

"I'm not a slut," she proclaimed.

"I never said you were; it's not like I thought you were a virgin; we did have a discussion about your past before we started dating."

"It was the way you said 'three'," Johanna replied. "And you know damn well who the three are so don't act like it was a surprise."

"Actually I don't think I know all of them."

Her gaze was sharp as she looked at him. "The first was a guy I was dating my senior year; his name was Bobby. It was one time and one time only and I did it for the wrong reasons, just so you know."

"Why was it the wrong reason?" he asked.

"Because I felt like I was being treated like a kid so I figured I'd go do something to prove I wasn't even though my parents wouldn't know about it. Like I said, it was only one time with him."

"How come?"

"I didn't like it," she replied. "I didn't like it at all and when he tried to talk me into a second time, I told him I didn't like it and I never wanted to do it again."

Jim laughed. "Wow; bet he felt real good about himself."

"I told you it was lousy…it wasn't worth the hype at all. I wasn't sure which one of us had done it wrong but I didn't want to do it again to figure it out. I didn't like it and figured I wouldn't do it again until I got married…but then I met the biggest jackass in the universe, Cade Rutherford, if you need your memory refreshed. I didn't want to do it with him either but he got me drunk and did it anyway…and since he pulled the 'But I love you' card, stupid here fell for it and figured I may as well do it again since he seemed to know what he was doing and I was stupid enough to love him."

"And then?" Jim asked.

"And then there was you," she remarked; "And you know it…and you're the only one that matters. I should've waited for you…you make it about both of us and it's always good with you…always worth the hype and then some."

He grinned. "Thank you; that's good to know…and just so you know; that goes both ways; you're definitely worth the hype and then some."

She blushed as she laughed softly. "You still haven't answered the original question."

Jim breathed deeply. "I shouldn't have started this conversation; I must've been having a moment of stupidity. I thought you were going to help me fight those moments of stupidity?"

"You're a work in progress," Johanna quipped; "It's going to take time. Now; how many girls took you home to meet their parents?"

"Oh God; I don't have an exact list off the top of my head…there was Mandy and Samantha…and Wendy…"

'Wendy?" she repeated. "Who the hell is Wendy; you've never mentioned a Wendy."

"College girlfriend," he replied. "Don't get jealous."

"I'm not jealous."

He laughed. "That's why your ears perked up and your head jerked toward me so fast that you probably have whiplash."

"I'm not jealous; just interested."

"Mhmm; anyway, there was Bambi but I don't really count that one."

"Bambi," Johanna repeated. "Really?"

"Yeah; she had a twin sister Tammy that Jeff dated. We only met their father as we were climbing out the window…he was a sheriff…it didn't end well that's why I don't really count that one…it's also why Jeff and I gave up dating twins."

"Oh my God," she said with a shake of her head. "I want the story and yet at the same time I don't even want to know."

He chuckled. "Let's see; after that I avoided parents at all costs for awhile."

"I bet."

"Then it was Kimberly."

"The Kimberly we work with…the one you kept telling me wasn't anything serious?" Johanna asked as she eyed him.

"Yeah…that's the one; but I didn't meet her parents on purpose, it just kind of happened and it was before you started working there."

"Uh huh."

"It was…it was like the week before."

"So when you were telling me it wasn't serious, it was?"

"Not to me," Jim remarked; "And besides; I didn't want you to think that I was totally unavailable."

"I wasn't totally available then," she said; "I was with Max."

He gave her an indulgent smile. "Sweetheart; I'm pretty sure I could've had you if I had just said the word."

She worried her bottom lip for a moment and then gave a slight nod. "You're probably right about that."

"Of course I am. Did Max meet your parents?"

"Yes but I told you about Max."

He nodded. "I know…and I got us away from my original point and that is that I have met fathers before; it's going to be fine. I can handle it."

She seemed to sink back into whatever dark space she had been brooding in the moment he said the words. "It's not you I'm worried about," she retorted. "I know you can handle it; but you don't know my father…he's a whole other class of handling and I'm sorry to put your through it. I don't know what he's going to say or do because you can never predict what Frank McKenzie might do; but mark my words; he'll show his true colors."

Jim was silent as he made the turn that lead into the McKenzie's neighborhood; the sound of Johanna's foot tapping seeming even louder as she wrapped her arms around herself. He drove silently down the street until they were about five houses away and then he pulled over and put the car in park. "What are you doing?" Johanna asked; a slight quiver in her voice.

He unhooked his seatbelt and turned toward her. "Look at me," he gently demanded as his hand fell to her knee.

Johanna turned her face toward him, butterflies still rampant in her stomach, a surge of emotion irritating her and yet she couldn't seem to stop the sting of tears. "What?"

He unhooked her seatbelt so she'd turn toward him and when she did so, his hand returned to her knee and squeezed it gently. "I love you," he told her; his voice low and sincere.

"I love you too," Johanna murmured.

"No matter what happens tonight, it's not going to change anything between us. I don't care what he says, what he does, what he thinks; nothing will change between us. I don't care if he likes me; if he approves of us. Nothing he does will matter; because when we leave tonight we'll be leaving together…and when we get back to your place, we'll be going to sleep together and we're going to wake up together, go to work together…we're going to do everything we always do because nothing is changed. I'm still going to love you and we're still getting married; so please stop worrying."

"I can't," she whispered.

"Why?"

"Because what if he finds some way to make you change your mind?"

Jim shook his head, his knuckles grazing her cheek. "That's never going to happen, Sweetheart; you're my girl and you're always going to be my girl. There's no going back. Please don't worry."

"I just want to go home," she said softly; her voice cracking a little despite her will to keep the emotion from leaking in.

"We will soon," he promised. "We won't stay any longer than we have to but you're going to feel better once we have this over with, okay?"

Johanna nodded but she wasn't sure she'd feel better; that remained to be seen. Jim leaned closer and caught her lips in a soft kiss. "It's going to be fine; it'll be over before you know it…are you ready?" he asked.

"I'll never be completely ready but we may as well go or we'll be late and he hates that," she said as her fingertips fell against the line of his jaw. He stole one more kiss and then rehooked the buckle of her seatbelt before he put the car in drive once more.

As they pulled up in front of her childhood home, Johanna closed her eyes and breathed deeply; God she hated this. She knew it was necessary but she hated her father's demands…even more, she was suddenly sorry that her mother had put out the word to Frankie and Colleen that this Sunday's dinner was off limits to them. She sighed; it might have been easier with more people around but her mother thought it would best with just the four of them…the double date from hell, in a manner of speaking, she couldn't help but think.

"Jo," Jim said; his voice pulling her from her thoughts.

"Yeah?"

"Are you ready?" he asked once again.

"No but we'll go anyway," she said as she unhooked her seatbelt and opened the car door.

There was a feeling of dread in her stomach as she waited on the sidewalk for Jim but she tried to shake it off as he made his way to her side and took her hand. They made their way up the sidewalk and steps to the porch and before she could knock, Naomi pulled the door open. "There you are," her mother said as she ushered them into the entry way. "I was starting to think that you weren't coming afterall."

"There was traffic," Jim lied smoothly; "But it's nice to see you, Mrs. McKenzie."

She smiled. "It's Naomi, dear; we've been over that; and besides; you're going to be family."

Jim gave her a grin. "I'll try not to slip up anymore."

"Make sure you don't," she said warmly before shifting her attention back to her daughter, her arms reaching for her to pull her into a hug. "Darling, you look like you're going to an execution; it's just dinner."

"Kind of feels like the same thing sometimes," she muttered as she hugged her mother tightly.

"Don't worry," Naomi told her. "I told you I've taken care of things; I've instructed your father to be on his very best behavior."

"What are the chances of that?"

"About fifty fifty as usual," her mother answered; "But don't worry; I know where the skillet is if he needs a whack. Now take off your coats and come on in."

Johanna sighed as she hung up her purse and coat on her usual hook by the door and then took Jim's from his hand and hung it up next to hers. "Let's get this over with," she muttered as she took his hand and followed Naomi into the living room.

Frank McKenzie rose from his chair as they entered the room and Jim studied the man as he focused on Johanna. He was of average height; his hair as dark as Johanna's, his eyes were brown, his gaze sharp and cool…his chin bearing the same curve as his daughter's. Now that he was seeing the man up close, he thought he might have to dial back his thought that Johanna looked like Naomi and her aunt Bridget…there was a resemblance to Frank as well in small ways and it dawned on him that his wife to be was a perfect blend of both her parents and their families in looks. He couldn't help but think that several members of the family had given their best genes and created one perfectly beautiful Johanna for him to admire the rest of his life.

"So you showed up," Frank stated; his gaze still pinned upon his daughter.

"Obviously," she replied tartly.

He smirked a little. "Well you did claim you weren't coming when you stormed out of here in the midst of your temper tantrum a few days ago. What made you change your mind?"

"My mother…as usual," Johanna answered. "If it wasn't for her, you'd never see me."

"There's no need for your attitude," he said as he crossed the room and pulled her into a one armed hug. The gesture made her stiffen and she didn't return the embrace, knowing that he was merely putting on a show for Jim.

"No need for a show either," she muttered; her tone low so she wouldn't be accused of trying to embarrass him but she was sure that Jim had heard her words anyway.

Frank pulled back from her, his cool gaze meeting hers. "I don't think I know what you mean."

"I think you do," she said; her own gaze never wavering.

A silent message seemed to pass between them, Jim observed as he watched Johanna and her father while Naomi hovered in the background wringing her hands as she watched intently, ready to spring into action at first sign of battle.

"So, is this him?" Frank asked; his head nodding toward Jim.

"No; it's some random guy I picked up off the street and paid to come to dinner with me," Johanna replied; making Jim smile as he slipped his arm around her waist and gave her hip a reassuring pat.

"I wouldn't put it past you," her father stated.

"Johanna," Naomi said; her tone soft but firm. "Introduce your father to Jim."

She closed her eyes for a second and wished she could fast forward to the end of the night but that didn't seem to be an option. "Dad; this is my fiancé Jim Beckett. Jim; this is the infamous Frank McKenzie."

Naomi laughed softly, ignoring the look her husband gave her. "I believe you meant to say 'this is my father, right, dear?"

"Right," she replied. "Jim; this is my infamous father, Frank McKenzie."

He couldn't help but smile despite trying to suppress the urge as he offered his hand to her father. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. McKenzie."

Frank scoffed slightly as he shook his hand. "I'd say the same but I prefer to reserve my judgments."

"Since when?" Johanna asked without thought.

Frank's eyes narrowed at her. "You're walking a fine line, little girl."

'What else is new?" she asked; unable to suppress her irritation that he had made the demand for this dinner…and that she had given into it as always.

"Dinner is almost ready," Naomi stated; "Why don't you all sit down and I'll let you know when we're ready to move to the table."

Frank retreated to his favorite chair without any prodding and Johanna reluctantly tugged Jim along with her to the sofa. They settled down together, Jim's hand falling to her knee out of habit despite Frank's gaze following the gesture. Johanna covered his hand with hers, her stomach full of knots and feeling like it could rebel at any moment. Her father's gaze met hers and she cringed inside.

"Go help your mother," he stated firmly.

"I have everything under control," Naomi said from the doorway of the kitchen. "She can stay put."

"Go help your mother," Frank said again; ignoring his wife's words.

"She said she's fine," Johanna replied; her hand tightening on Jim's.

"Go," he stated firmly; his tone brokering nonsense.

Johanna remained in her seat, holding his gaze with a stubborn one of her own. Jim patted her knee. "Go ahead," he told her. "I know you like to be in the kitchen with your mother."

She didn't want to leave Jim alone with Frank and yet she desperately wanted to flee all at the same time. "It's alright," Jim said with a smile. "Go ahead."

Frank scoffed as she rose from her place. "It's good to see you're practicing to be an obedient wife…you were a little lacking at being an obedient daughter where I'm concerned. What do you think I'm going to do to him that makes you want to stay glued to his side?"

"Most likely you're going to be yourself," Johanna remarked. "And that's enough of an offense for some."

"Like sensitive little girls like you who can dish it out but can't take it?"

"I've taken plenty," she replied as she walked away. "No one can say otherwise."

Frank's gaze stayed on her back as she moved into the kitchen and Jim took the chance to subtly observe him. It had never been a secret that Johanna didn't get along with her father; it was no secret that there was a deep well of hurt inside of her in regard to Frank McKenzie. Being in the same room with them seemed to bring the point home though. In front of her father it was easy to see the part of Johanna that was still a little girl who felt unwanted by her father. He could feel the tension between them; the way Johanna stayed on guard…the way Frank watched her intently as if seeking the right moment to strike if she gave him reason to.

And he had a feeling that no matter what Johanna did; Frank would ultimately decide that she had given him reason.

"So," Frank said; his gaze boring into him. "Where did she find you?"

Jim had a feeling that Frank already knew that answer but he'd indulge the man and his intimidation tactics. "At work," he answered; "But technically I found her on her first day at the firm."

"Is that right?"

"Yes it is."

"And how exactly did you find her at the law firm on her first day?"

"Well there's a desk at one end of the hallway where someone usually sits to direct clients and guests and new employees. She was leaning against it, looking over her paperwork that we all get on our first day."

"And you just took it upon yourself to walk up to her?" Frank asked.

Jim nodded. "Yeah, I did."

"Why?"

"Because she's beautiful and I wanted to know who she was," he replied honestly.

"I see…and how long have you known her now?"

"Three and a half years."

"How long have you been dating?"

Jim shrugged. "Technically about six months."

"What do you mean by technically?" her father asked.

"I mean as an official couple…we were kind of unofficially together for about a year and a half."

"Which means what?" Frank asked; his eyes narrowed as he assessed him.

"It means we were friends who went on dates but didn't call it a date. We also traveled together and were there for each other in important ways; so technically, we've been together for a good while; just officially for about six months."

"And now you've decided to marry her," Frank remarked.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Why?" Jim repeated.

"You heard me; why? Why do you want to marry her?"

"Any man in his right mind would want to marry her," Jim retorted; "But I'm marrying her because I love her and I want her to be my wife. I don't want to spend a single day without her."

"She has her faults," Frank stated.

"So do I," he replied; his gaze remaining on him. "Everyone has faults…even fathers."

Frank's fingers drummed on the arm of the chair for a moment. "Are you older than her?"

"Yes; by two years."

"How long have you been with the law firm?"

"Since I got out of law school," Jim answered.

"Any prospects of moving up in the firm?"

He shrugged. "I think we all have prospects and the possibility to be offered a partnership at some point."

"Where did you get your education?"

"Cornell University; I was in the top ten of my class."

Frank gave a slight nod. "You've mentioned traveling with my daughter; was that for work purposes?"

"Sometimes; earlier this year we went to Albany for a case."

"During her birthday," Frank muttered.

"Yes; but don't worry, I made sure she had a nice birthday."

"I wasn't concerned about it," he retorted; "Just marking a timeline."

"May I ask why?"

"Because I like to know things," her father stated. "Any other travels?"

"We've been to a lot of places; some for work, some for fun and vacation."

"Did you take her on some silly road trip?" he demanded to know.

"Yeah I did and it was far from silly."

"Uh huh; I have a feeling it was far from innocent too," Frank stated gruffly.

Jim eyed him. "It was more innocent than your trip to the Blue Moon Club."

Frank leaned back in his chair; his eyes widening slightly. "So it was you who was there with her," he hissed.

"It was me," he replied with a nod.

"Did you think it was an appropriate place to take my daughter?" he demanded to know.

"No, I didn't and I told her so…but she was determined and I didn't want her going with someone else. She didn't feel it was an appropriate place for her father to be either, just so you know."

"Oh I know all about it," he hissed. "And since you were the one she was with; I guess I can feel safe in assuming that it was you who was in her bedroom when I stopped at her apartment that night."

"That's right, I was there."

"Leaving marks on her neck like she was a common floozy!" he said in a low voice so that the women in the kitchen wouldn't overhear.

"It was an accident," Jim replied; "And I'd never treat her like a floozy. I have always had the utmost respect for her."

"You better," he said gruffly; "And I don't want to see marks on her like that again."

"Understood."

"And I don't ever want to hear about the Blue Moon again," Frank said sternly.

"Then don't cast judgment on the things we've done that you don't know the details of," Jim told him. "I took Johanna away that summer so that she could get away from here…and from the discord with her family. It wasn't a good year for her; but I'm sure you know that."

Frank eyed him; having a feeling that he had met a man that wasn't afraid to tell him what he thought of him. "Just what has she told you about me?"

"She's told me plenty," Jim replied.

"She has a tendency to exaggerate."

"Sometimes," he agreed; "But most of the time she's right on the money."

"She hasn't told me much about you," Frank stated.

"Maybe she didn't think you'd be interested."

"Why the hell not?"

"From what I hear because you've never been interested in anything she does."

"Do you think you know me, boy?" he asked.

"No; and I didn't claim that I did. I said that I had heard; and for the record; I'm not a boy, I'm a man."

Frank eyed him sharply. "My wife claims that she's met you several times."

"That's true."

"How many times?"

"I don't have an exact count; maybe 6 or 7 times."

"And where did these meetings take place?"

"Some in public and some at Johanna's place."

Her father's gaze narrowed once more. "Are you living with my daughter?"

"No; I'm not. I have my own apartment."

"It's a good damn thing because I don't approve of shacking up."

"We're not living together. Do I spend time in her apartment, yes. Does she spend time in mine, yes."

"You've got all the answers, don't you?"

"I'm just telling you the truth, Mr. McKenzie. I figured you'd respect that."

"Don't go trying to guess what kind of qualities I'm looking for in the man who's supposedly going to marry my daughter."

"Oh I'm marrying her," Jim stated. "There's no supposing about it; it's going to happen."

"It's time for dinner," Naomi announced as she entered the room and sat two plates down on the table, Johanna following behind her with two more. "Come sit down."

Frank moved to the table without a second thought to Jim and took his usual seat at one end of the table as his wife and daughter returned with small bowls of salads that they sat at each place. "Do you need any help?" Jim asked Johanna.

"No; we've got it," she replied with a small smile. "But thank you for asking."

"Yes," Naomi said with a smile of her own. "It's nice to have a gentleman around."

Frank smirked at her. "Don't act like I've never carried a plate for you because I have."

"Not recently," his wife replied as she and their daughter returned to the kitchen to fetch the breadsticks and glasses of wine.

When all the dishes were on the table, Jim rounded it to pull out Johanna's chair for her and she smiled in gratitude. "Thank you," she murmured.

"Putting on a good show, are you?" Frank asked as he watched Jim pull out Naomi's chair for her.

"Leave him alone, Frank," Naomi said before Jim could answer. "He's a nice young man who knows how to act like a gentleman."

"It's more like sucking up to his future mother-in-law," Frank said with a scoff.

"If he is, then he's off to a good start," Naomi retorted. "But I don't see why he'd need to suck up; I've already met him; I like him and I think that he suits Johanna well. They'll be very happy together."

Frank's gaze shifted back to Jim as they all picked up their forks to begin digging into the lasagna that Naomi had prepared. "Why is it that everyone in this family has met you but me?" he asked. "Have you been hiding from me?"

"No," Jim laughed. "I have no reason to hide from anyone."

"Then why haven't I seen you here before?"

"Because you haven't been here the times Johanna brought me," he replied; "As for everyone else; I met Colleen by accident when she crashed Johanna's birthday celebration last year. I met Frankie when he came to the office to tell Johanna about her grandfather being in the hospital. I met Greg when Johanna was babysitting him and Valerie when I picked Johanna up here before our trip to Albany. I met Sophia because I went to dinner there with Johanna."

"You've met my mother-in-law but you're just now meeting me?!" Frank thundered.

"Yeah; pretty much."

"Why?" he demanded to know.

"I don't know; it just never seemed to line up right."

"Is it that or is it that my daughter has been keeping you away?" Frank asked as he eyed Johanna.

"A little of both," Johanna replied; "Now get off his back. If you want blame anyone for it, you direct it at me."

"Fine; why the hell have you been hiding him?"

"Because of the way you act, Dad," she retorted. "Did that thought ever cross your mind?"

"I act just fine!"

"Sure you do," she muttered as she cut her lasagna and took a small bite.

"You're the one with a problem, Johanna; not me," her father stated. "You've always had a problem."

She glanced down at the table. "Yes, I know; I've had a problem all my life…guess who it is?"

"Alright; that's enough," Naomi stated. "Frank, it doesn't matter who has met him before you; all that matters is that you're meeting him now and please don't goad Johanna into a fight that she doesn't want to have."

"Seems to me like she's always spoiling for a fight," he remarked.

"Perhaps you should ask yourself why that might be," his wife replied; "Now drop it."

Dinner was mostly silent for a short while with the exception of Naomi's gentle attempts to keep small talking circulating around the table but it quickly ran its course as they ate and Johanna hoped it would be the end of whatever interrogation her father had planned...but somehow she doubted it.

---

"Well," Frank said, breaking the silence a short time later after swallowing a bite of lasagna; his gaze focused on Jim.

"Well what?" Jim asked, seeing even more tension seeping into Johanna's body.

"Do you make enough to support my daughter?" he asked.

"Dad!" Johanna exclaimed. "Jim is a lawyer; he works for the same firm as I do. He's very successful."

Frank gave her a sharp look. "I didn't ask you; and knowing what he does for a living and where he does it at doesn't tell me anything about how he spends his money."

Jim held Frank's stare when the man's gaze shifted back to him. "I assure you, Mr. McKenzie that Johanna will be well taken care of. I make a good living. I don't mean to sound like I'm bragging but I am good at my job and I'm paid well to do it."

"That may be but have you thought about the expense a wife adds to your life?" Frank asked.

"I can support a wife," Jim said firmly. "She won't want for anything."

"You're sure about that? Johanna has expensive tastes…as you can tell from her clothes and handbags."

"I'm not worried about her shopping trips to Macys," he replied. "We'll be just fine."

Frank pondered the statement for a long moment as he chewed another bite of his dinner. "What if you were suddenly out of work? Do you have any financial means to fall back on?"

"Dad; really?" Johanna asked with a sigh of impatience.

"Stay out of it," Frank told her. "As your father, I have a right to know if I'm going to be doling out loans to keep you fed one day."

"I've got my own damn money," Johanna retorted. "I do have a job you know; it's not like his income is going to be all we have; I'll have mine too."

"Zip it," Frank told her with a sharp look and she fell silent, her lips pursed together in anger.

Jim swallowed the bite he had taken and once again met his future father-in-law's eye. "I have savings and I have investments that turn a nice profit on a regular basis. I can put your mind at ease and assure you that the day will never come when we ask you for so much as a dime. I don't foresee myself being out of a job but if it would happen for some unforeseen reason, we'd be fine until I could get another one; and trust me, I would. We won't ask for any loans of any kind. After all, I'm well aware that you've already hung Johanna's tuition and room and board over her head to force her to be your lawyer a few months ago and I'll never have her put in that position of 'owing' you again."

Frank leaned back in his chair looking slightly taken aback by Jim's blunt statement. "That was between my daughter and I," he stated. "It didn't hurt her to do me a favor."

"I'm going to have to disagree with that," he replied. "After all, I'm the one who watched her twist herself into knots while she shoved your case into the midst of the caseload she was already dealing with on a week's notice. I saw the long hours she had to put in for it, the worry, the stress…and that price tag hanging over her head about that debt she 'owed' you in your mind."

"Like I said, that was between my daughter and I."

Jim met his eye. "No; when you hurt her, that's between the three of us."

"Is that so?" Frank asked; his tone making Johanna's stomach clench.

Jim nodded. "That's so."

Naomi reached out and patted Johanna's hand, seeing how her face paled. "Just let men be men," she whispered. "It's better this way."

"I'm not so sure about that," she muttered as she reached for her wine glass.

"Do you gamble?" Frank asked; his focus returning to the topic of Jim's finances.

"Gamble in what way?" Jim asked. "I play a little poker with my friends once in awhile but it's nothing that puts me in debt or even in fear of it."

"What about horse races or bets on sports games."

"No."

"You're sure?'

"I'm positive," Jim replied. "If I was a gambler, I wouldn't have been able to afford the ring I gave Johanna. It's paid in full, in case you're wondering…all three carats of that diamond are paid for; no payment plan."

"Don't you think it was a bit extravagant?" Frank asked. "Did she really need a three carat diamond?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because she's worth it," Jim replied without missing a beat. "She's worth every penny I spent."

"Just how much was that?" Frank asked.

"Dad; that's none of your business!" Johanna exclaimed. "He doesn't have to answer that; all you need to know is that it's paid for. Now drop it."

"And I told you to be quiet," her father retorted.

"She doesn't have to be quiet," Jim remarked. "She can say anything she wants; she's a grown woman, she doesn't have to take orders."

'I can see what attracted the two of you to each other," Frank stated. "You both have smart mouths."

"Only when provoked," he replied. "If I don't like how someone treats her, I say something about it; whether that person be a co-worker, a friend, stranger, client or even her father. No one will treat her badly in front of me and get away with it."

Frank nodded. "So you're going to spend your life defending her honor over every little slight the universe throws at her?"

"It's a job I gladly accept," Jim informed him.

Frank's gaze shifted to Johanna. "Well, you've got him wrapped around your little finger, don't you? He'll coddle and baby you for the rest of your life just like your mother does."

"Frank," Naomi said in warning. "Don't push your luck."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll pick up that skillet in the kitchen and come in here and wham you with it for being a jackass," she told him. "At least she's found a man willing to stand up for her. I've never seen you stand up for me a day in your life. I remember crying to you about what your brother said to me at our engagement party and you said 'Oh, Naomi, stop being a baby and get over it."

"He was drunk, he didn't mean what he said," Frank replied.

"That may be, but you still could've defended me but you didn't. You've never defended me."

"This isn't about you, Naomi," he remarked. "It's about making sure your daughter has made the right decision."

"I have," Johanna said sharply. "Even if you don't agree with it; I know I have."

"I'll be the judge of that," Frank said; his attention returning to Jim. "What's your father's name?"

"Robert Beckett," he answered.

Frank's brow rose, recognition of the name in his gaze. "Vice President of a bank downtown?"

"Yes," Jim replied. "He's also on the board of a few other smaller banks."

"My company has done business with him."

"I know; he's mentioned it," Jim said.

Frank eyed him but Jim left the sentence as it was so that the man could wonder just what Robert Beckett had said about him and his company. "And your mother?" he asked.

"Her name is Elizabeth."

"Who was she before she was married?"

"Still Elizabeth," Jim quipped; making Johanna giggle. He grinned at her from across the table; a look passing between them that spoke of understanding and love and a touch of apology on both of their parts. Naomi smiled at the scene, knowing that her daughter had chosen wisely and would be in good hands and well taken care of.

"I meant her maiden name and where she came from," Frank retorted.

"Bradley," he answered. "She came from Pennsylvania and her family owns the chain of Bradley pharmacies that you may have heard of in the tristate area."

"I've heard of them," he sniffed. "Do you have siblings?"

"Three brothers and a sister."

"What do they do?"

"My oldest brother is in banking like our father; my second oldest brother is in the military; my younger brother is in real estate and my sister works in retail," he answered. "My oldest brother is also married and has four children in case you want to know."

Frank regarded him quietly for a moment as he took another bite of his dinner. "Where do you intend for my daughter to live once you marry her."

"I intend for her to live with me," he replied; earning himself a grin from Johanna. "As for the specific location; we'll figure that out later on. I can move in with her or she can move in with me or we can find another place that suits us. It won't be an issue; she'll have a home."

"You say that like you can just snap your fingers and everything will be the way you want it," Frank remarked.

"Well it doesn't make much difference to me how we arrange things living wise; if we're just moving into one of the places we have now then there's nothing to worry about besides getting rid of some things so we can combine households. If we decide to find a different apartment I don't think we'll have any issues; we're both employed, we have good salaries and know what we can afford; we can find something we like for our budget if we want to but we don't need to go into that right now. We've got time."

"He's right," Naomi commented. "They can figure out those details after they set a date for the wedding."

"When is the wedding?" Frank asked.

"We haven't set a date yet," Johanna answered; "And we're not going to yet. We've been engaged for a week; I don't need the date yet."

"Don't put it off too long, dear," Naomi said; "If you want a summer wedding we need to start planning soon."

"After the holidays, Mom," she sighed. "Just let me get through the holidays, okay?"

Her mother smiled. "Of course, Bambina. I'm not trying to rush you."

Johanna glanced across the table at Jim and he gave her a small consoling smile. He knew this meal wasn't easy for her; that she was uncomfortable and worried about whatever would come out of her father's mouth next. He was fine though; he wasn't put off by Frank McKenzie's questioning or the attitude of intimidation the man wanted to put forward. Frank was playing the role of concerned father who had to make sure his daughter's choices were up to his standards…and he wanted to do that by putting on the guise of belief that he had no faith in Johanna's decision making skills. Jim had a feeling that it wasn't like that at all…things might be rough and rocky between them; he didn't doubt for a moment that Frank didn't treat her well…but there were shades of protectiveness in the man's demeanor. He was sure that it wasn't noticeable to Johanna; the man had made her numb in some respects to the idea that he could care more than he let on, but he could see it and he'd play along. He'd answer the questions. He'd make it known that he was the best choice…and that no one, not even Frank McKenzie, would hurt her if he could help it.

"Do you have a criminal record?" Frank asked; pulling him from his thoughts.

"Dad!" Johanna nearly yelled. "What the hell? I don't date criminals!"

"I want to make sure of it," he replied; "The question stands."

"Did you ask Paul that question?" she asked.

"You're damn right I did; he works on Wall Street…it makes him predisposed to be a crook," Frank remarked.

"I bet Colleen loved that," she muttered.

"I believe she was in the bathroom when he asked that," Naomi commented.

"I didn't want to listen to her cry about it," Frank stated; his gaze then moving back to Jim. "So; do you have a record?"

"No; I don't have a criminal record," he answered. "A few traffic tickets that have been paid in full long ago; but nothing criminal."

"You've never been arrested?"

"No," he said; figuring that Frank didn't need to know about that one night in college when he and Jeff had been arrested. The charges had been dropped and nothing had come of it except a traffic ticket.

"You're sure?"

"Yeah; I think I'd know."

"My daughter wants children; are you going to give her children?" Frank asked.

Jim nodded. "Yeah but not as many as my brother had; four is ridiculous."

"My parents had four children," Frank retorted.

"Mine had five," Jim replied; "They're crazy too."

"Five is pushing it," Frank said with a nod. "When these children start coming along, do you intend to force my daughter to give up her career?"

"No," he said; "Why would I do that? Johanna's great at what she does; I'd never ask her to stop just because we had a child. We'll work out how to juggle things."

"What if she wants to stop working to be with the children?" her father asked.

"That's fine too," he answered; "I make enough to support us if she'd want to stay home. That decision is hers; I'll support whichever choice she makes but I'm sure she'll want to keep working. She enjoys being a lawyer; she's very good at it and being a wife and mother doesn't mean she has to give that up."

"So you're not going to force her into being a housewife once she has a baby?"

"No; of course not; and even if I wanted to, Johanna's not a woman to be forced into anything she doesn't want to do. She has a backbone, she's not afraid to use it."

"More like an attitude problem," Frank remarked.

"I like her attitude."

"Until the first time it's used against you," he retorted.

Jim smiled. "Oh I've had a few healthy doses of her attitude…clearly it didn't send me running. I like when she's sassy."

"For now," Frank said; "It's different once you're married. You're not the type who believes in hitting a woman, do you?"

"No!"

"Jim has never hit me," Johanna said, outrage in her tone.

"Sometimes they wait until you have the ring on your finger," her father stated.

"I would never lay a hand on her," Jim replied. "I wasn't raised to beat on women; my father has never put his hands on my mother, and God knows she's probably given him reason to a few times but he's never done it and neither will I. If I'm that angry I'll leave and come back when I'm cooled off. I'd never hit her."

"You make sure you don't," Frank said as he eyed him; "Because if I ever see any bruises on her, I'll kill you."

Jim nodded. "Understood."

"Make sure it is."

"You have my word," he assured. "I'd never hit her."

"He's very good to me, Dad," Johanna said; her tone soft. "I don't worry about anything like that; he's not that kind of man."

"But he is the kind of man who proposes without the permission of your father," he retorted.

"He doesn't need your permission; I told you that," Johanna remarked.

"In my day a man asked a woman's father permission," Frank retorted. "Even mealy mouthed Paul asked me if he could marry Colleen. Now what's your excuse?"

Jim met his eye. "Well, for one, I didn't know you and I thought it might be a bit awkward for some stranger to come ask for your daughter's hand in marriage."

"You could've introduced yourself first and I'm sure you know where I can be found," her father stated.

"I didn't want to meet you behind her back," Jim replied. "Meeting you has been a concern for her and I didn't want it to happen without her knowledge. I also didn't figure it would matter; after all, why should a man have to ask the father? I'm not marrying you; I'm marrying her; I need her permission."

"In this family, when you marry one, you marry us all," Frank retorted.

"Okay but you're not all living with us," Jim quipped.

Johanna couldn't help but giggle. "But Mom can spend the night if she needs to get away, right?"

"Anytime," he replied.

"I might have to take you up on that," Naomi said as she picked up a bite of her salad. "And that's nonsense about marrying the whole family. He's marrying into the family but that doesn't mean he has to bow to your will or ways, Frank. Just like Johanna doesn't have to bow to his family's ways."

"We're not talking about his family," Frank said; "Were talking about my family and how I wasn't asked for her hand."

"Why does it matter?!" Johanna exclaimed. "It's not like you've ever cared about what I do."

"You're my daughter; my first born daughter to be exact and I expected to be asked for your hand," Frank retorted. "It's what's proper."

Johanna laughed. "Since when has that mattered to you?"

"Yes, Frank; since when does that matter?" Naomi asked; "You're pretty lax on what's proper at times."

"Hush, Naomi."

"No, I won't; you shut up," she retorted. "You just want to pick."

"No; I'm just telling them how this should've been done," he thundered.

"Fine," Jim said as he glanced at Frank. "Mr. McKenzie, I love your daughter and I want her to be my wife. Do I have your permission to marry her?"

"Before I give an answer; what will you do if I say no?" Frank asked.

"I'll marry her anyway," he answered honestly. "It doesn't matter to me if you approve or not. I love her and she loves me and we're going to be together regardless of who likes it and who doesn't. Now, do I have your permission to marry her?"

'If you want her, take her," Frank replied; "But let me make this clear; once you take her; you keep her. We have a no returns policy here; once you have her, she's yours; you don't bring her back. I'm not supporting a divorced daughter and her children so you make sure this is what you want; because she's yours to keep."

Jim met Frank's eye. "You don't ever have to worry about me trying to return her," he said firmly. "I have no intention of ever giving her up and I sure as hell wouldn't bring her back to you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he asked.

"It means you've made it more than clear how little you care about your daughters…and I don't like the way you've treated her tonight. I don't know if you're doing it to try to prove to me that you can be stern and intimidating or if it's just how you are but either way, it's not impressive and I'm not intimidated. You haven't shown her an ounce of feeling this evening besides making sure that she won't be beat on and I'm surprised that it matters to you since you seem to care so little about her. Do you have any idea what a wonderful person she is? How loving and caring and smart she is? Do you know anything about her at all? Why don't you enjoy her instead of harping at her all the time? She loves you, you know…and I don't think you let it be known that you love her; but I do…I love her and I won't approve of anyone treating her badly…even you. Now if you want to disapprove of me, that's fine; but I'm still marrying her and you can be happy for us or not but it's not going to affect us either way."

"Are you done?" Frank asked.

"For the moment," he replied; noticing that Johanna had stopped eating and looked like she was regretting the few bites she had taken. "I guess it depends on what else you have to say."

Frank regarded him for a long minute. "You have my permission to marry her."

That wasn't the answer Jim had been expecting. "Why? So she'll be off your hands?"

"No; although it's nice to know that she'll finally be settled."

"Then why?" he asked.

"Because I like you," Frank stated as he picked up another bite of his dinner. "You're the kind of man I like; one who isn't afraid to speak his mind."

The comment was unexpected; the surprise of it drying up Jim's words. A glance across the table told him that Johanna was just as surprised as he was.

"So you're giving them your blessing?" Naomi asked.

"It wouldn't matter if I didn't; they'd get married anyway," Frank replied.

"That's true, but I'm sure that despite what you said, Johanna would like to know that her father has no objections," his wife stated.

"I don't have any objections, he's fine," Frank said; his gaze flicking toward Johanna as he said the words; his fingers reaching for a breadstick.

Naomi smiled as she glanced at Johanna. "See, dear; I told you everything would be fine."

"Can I go home now?" she asked; her stomach still feeling queasy from the whole ordeal; and if she was being perfectly honest with herself; she didn't entirely believe or trust her father's easy acceptance of Jim. She wanted to let her guard down but she couldn't…she didn't trust him not to be up to no good.

"Not yet," her mother said with an indulgent smile. "Finish your dinner; you should be able to eat now."

That's what she thought, Johanna mused as Jim's gaze met hers, a reassuring smile on his lips. She managed to give him a smile of her as she picked up a forkful of salad. She wasn't going to feel better until she was on her way home.

"So, Jim," Frank said; "Do you like sports?"

"Yeah," he replied; still a bit surprised that he had passed the father-in-law test. "I like baseball and football; and I also enjoy a basketball game once in awhile."

Frank nodded. "I used to go to a lot of basketball games but I haven't been to any in a long time. I did manage to go to the Giants game a few weeks ago with Frankie."

"At the new Stadium?" Jim asked.

"Yeah; have you been there?"

"Not yet; but I saw the game on TV. I'm glad they won that one; they've had a terrible season and it would've been embarrassing to lose at their new stadium."

"That's true on both counts. They've been a disgrace all season," Frank agreed. "Who do you think is headed for the Super Bowl?"

"I think the Raiders will be there for sure," he remarked. "I'm not sure who will be joining them but I guess we'll find out in a few days."

Johanna glanced to her mother as the football talk carried on. "They're bonding," Naomi whispered to her. "Isn't it nice?"

"I'm not sure," she whispered. "On one hand it's nice and on the other it's a little horrifying that it's happening so easily…are you sure Dad doesn't have something up his sleeve."

"Nothing that I know of," her mother replied. "But he seems to be enjoying the conversation; Jim likes sports so that's a good thing. Your father likes to talk about those games; he does that with Frankie of course but now he can do that with your husband as well…it doesn't happen with Paul; that's for sure."

"Oh I know," Johanna replied. "Paul is a causal observer…and a snarky one at that."

Naomi nodded. "So you see; your father and Jim will get along just fine because they have a common interest. I think he really does like him," she said softly; not that the men were paying any attention to them. "You were worried for nothing."

"I'll never not worry where Dad is concerned."

"I know…but you can worry less now about this," Naomi said as she reached out and brushed her cheek. "Everything is going to be fine…and you're going to be such a beautiful bride."

She smiled. "I hope so."

"You will be; and your father will be very proud to walk you down the aisle."

"He'll be in a hurry to get rid of me like Colleen."

Naomi shook her head. "No, Bambina; with you it'll be a little harder for him."

"How do you figure?"

"You're his first daughter…it'll be harder to let go of you."

She scoffed slightly; a smile clinging to her lips. "I find that hard to believe."

"Trust me, I know…you'll see when the time comes," Naomi said with a wink. "It won't be easy for him to let you go. He might mask it but I know him, giving you away will be like giving away a little piece of his heart."

Johanna didn't believe that but she smiled and said nothing; allowing her mother to believe that she had convinced her that such a feat was possible as the men continued their conversation about various sports teams.

---

Johanna's unease settled throughout the rest of the evening but it didn't dissipate completely as she waited with bated breath to see if Frank would turn on Jim whenever he didn't agree with a certain assessment on sports, politics, or business. So far there hadn't been anything but respectful debate but she couldn't shake the feeling that it couldn't be this easy. It wasn't that she didn't want her father to like Jim; she did want him to like him…and she was glad that they were getting along; and yet there was a small part of her that was jealous of it. She hated herself for that feeling that way; it wasn't fair to feel that way; neither one of them were doing anything wrong…it just chafed that her father could take Jim's rebukes and happily accept him and get along with him…and with her; well with her, there wasn't much acceptance. Emotion surged forward and she quietly got up from the sofa and headed for the stairs that would take her to her old room.

She flipped on the light once she entered her old bedroom and she drifted to the window, staring out at the night sky as a few tears slipped free. It seemed silly to cry over something that would never change; something that she had accepted long ago…and yet sometimes she still ached inside…sometimes she still felt like she was six years old and wondering why her daddy didn't seem to like her as much as he liked her brother and sister. She knew she wasn't blameless for her father's feelings; she grated on his nerves just as much as he grated on hers. She was opinionated and he knew how to push her buttons…and nine times out of ten she took his bait because it was second nature. She wished it didn't have to be that way; that she didn't have to harbor bad thoughts about him or battle him when the occasion called for it.

Johanna flicked away a tear angrily; she was being silly shedding tears, there was no doubt about that. She should be happy that her father liked Jim and accepted him without trouble; that for the most part he had minded his manners and hadn't taken too many shots at her. She had made her peace with their relationship; it didn't matter that he could get along with everyone but her. Soon she'd be married, her last name no longer McKenzie and family dinners most likely fewer. Maybe it wouldn't hurt so much then; maybe it wouldn't bother her at all once she was settled down with a husband; after all, her husband's approval was all that would matter.

"What's wrong?" Naomi asked gently as she suddenly appeared at Johanna's side; startling her.

"Nothing," she murmured. "You know I just like to come upstairs to my room…old times sake and all that."

"Mhmm," her mother said as she skimmed her fingers against her daughter's damp cheek. "Why are you crying?"

"I don't know," she admitted; a shaky breath wracking her frame as her mother's hand moved soothingly against her back.

"It must be something," Naomi murmured. "I know you were worried about tonight but I think everything has gone pretty well in most respects. Your father, despite a few slipups, has been pretty well behaved."

"I know."

"And he gave his blessing; he seems to like Jim very well."

Johanna nodded. "Yeah; it's official; he can get along with everyone but me," she said; her voice cracking as the words rolled off her tongue.

"Oh, darling; is that what this is all about?" her mother asked softly.

She shrugged; staying silent as a few more tears spilled down her cheeks. "Come here," Naomi said; tugging her into her arms. "Let me hold you."

Johanna sank into her mother's embrace and held her tightly; for some reason suddenly needing all the love and comfort that Naomi could give. "I know that things have never been easy between you and your father, Bambina," her mother said, her tone low and gentle; "But he loves you. I know he makes it hard for you to believe; that the two of you clash more often than not; but he loves you. He loves you so very much."

"He doesn't," she whispered.

"He does," Naomi said with conviction. "You're his little girl despite that gruff demeanor he likes to put on. He's loved you from the moment he knew I was carrying you. I remember when you were just a newborn; I kept you in the cradle in our room and sometimes at night when you'd cry, he'd get up and pick you up and your little head looked so small in the palm of his hand…he'd kiss your forehead and then hold you close until I was ready to feed you. We kept you in that cradle a month longer than we should have because he said you were too little to be upstairs in that big crib all by yourself."

Johanna found it hard to believe but she didn't say so as she clung to her mother, allowing a few more tears to slip free. "What did I do to make things be the way they are between us?" she whispered instead. "What did I do, Mama?"

Naomi shook her head as her hand moved over her daughter's hair. "You didn't do anything, baby; absolutely nothing. Your father's ways are in no way your fault. He's a stern man…a man afraid to be too attached in a lot of ways and so he purposely keeps people at a distance. It's something I nag him about; but it doesn't do much good. He is who he is…and darling, neither one of us can change him no matter how much we may want to. I keep hoping that age will soften him…and who knows, maybe one day it will but until then, we just have to remember that he's a work in progress just like the rest of us…but I know he loves you. He may not always show it; but he loves you."

"I wish I could believe that way you want me to," she replied.

"And I wish that I could not only make you know it and believe it but that I could change Frank McKenzie into the type of man who shows affection and let's people know that he cares about them more often."

"It's not your fault."

"It's not yours either," Naomi stated as she pulled back from her and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"I guess we're just stuck with him the way he is," Johanna said softly.

"Pretty much," her mother sighed. "But there's no need for you to shed anymore tears about it. Some things just can't be changed and the only way you can get past them is to let it go a little at a time until it doesn't bother you so much anymore."

"I don't know what's wrong with me this week," she said as she wiped her cheeks. "I'm all over the map; bouncing between being happy and crying and everything in between."

Naomi laughed softly. "Well, dear; you're a woman and we're known to go through those phases; especially when important moments have happened in our lives. You just got engaged and that's a happy, wonderful thing; but if I remember correctly, it also comes with that tiny little feeling of fear about that upcoming promotion to wife; and that's completely normal to feel. There's been this business with having Jim meet your father and I know that's been stressful for you. I'm sure you've told your friends and probably other colleagues know as well; and there's work, I'm sure that figures in somewhere too. You've probably had a lot on your plate all of a sudden."

She nodded. "Yeah; I guess so…I haven't been sleeping well the last few days either."

"I figured you hadn't been; I can always tell," Naomi stated; "And it's no secret that our emotions get out of whack when it's that time of the month…could that be a culprit?"

"I had it Tuesday but it was finished by Friday."

Her mother smiled. "But the memory sometimes lingers…or rather; the hormones."

She laughed. "Well, that's true; it does sometimes linger."

"See; it's no wonder you feel like you're a mess; I would feel the same way," Naomi consoled. "But it's all going to be fine, don't worry anymore. Just enjoy your engagement, okay, Bambina?"

Johanna gave a nod. "I am enjoying it…despite being a mess this week and the slight headache I've had all day."

Naomi gave her a motherly pat on her hip. "Go wash your face and take something for your headache and I'll go on downstairs and make it known that you're not feeling all that well so that Jim will take you home now. I'd say the evening has been enough of a success and you have to work in the morning, you need to get some rest."

Her daughter wrapped her in one more hug. "I love you, Mama."

"I love you too," her mother said warmly; "Now go clean up; I'll go take care of the men and their sports talk."

Johanna left the room and moved across the hallway to the bathroom and Naomi headed down the stairs to rejoin Frank and Jim in the living room.

---

"What's Johanna's problem?" Frank asked when Naomi came into his line of vision.

"Nothing really; she's just not feeling very well tonight. She has a headache," Naomi answered.

"One of those bad ones?" Frank asked and Jim didn't miss the flicker of worry that passed across the man's face.

"No, dear; not a migraine; just a normal run of the mill headache that's been nagging at her all day. A good night's sleep and she'll be fine; she'll be down in a minute, Jim."

"Is she okay?" he asked despite Naomi's explanation.

The older woman smiled. "She's fine; just a little tried and she has that headache as I mentioned. I think she's probably ready to go home and settle down for the night."

He nodded in understanding as they heard Johanna's footsteps coming down the stairs. She met the inquisitive gaze of the two men in the room and allowed a small smile to touch her lips as she moved to retake her place next to Jim.

"Are you alright?" Jim asked.

"I have a little bit of a headache," she replied. "I'm sure I'll be able to sleep it off."

Jim nodded. "We should go," he said; "I'll get you home so you can get some rest so you'll feel better for work tomorrow."

"That's probably a good idea," she said as she got up from the couch. "I hope I don't seem like I'm rushing to leave, Mom," she added to make it all look good although she really did have a headache.

"Not at all, darling; we've had a nice evening. I hope you'll both be back soon…and Jim, as you know, you're welcome to join us for Christmas dinner."

"Yes, I know; thank you," he replied. "I'll probably be here."

"Let's get out coats," Johanna said as she took his hand to lead him to the entry way.

When they were out of sight and Frank moved to follow them, Naomi stepped into his path and beckoned him to lower his head so that she could whisper in his ear. "You hug your daughter," she whispered; "And you do it like you mean it this time, or so help me God, Frank McKenzie; there will be hell to pay…you won't sleep a single wink tonight."

Frank pulled back from her, his eyes meeting her no nonsense blue gaze and he gave a slight nod instead of launching an argument. They moved into the entryway where Jim and Johanna were buttoning their coats.

"Thanks for dinner, Mom," Johanna said; "It was great as always."

"You're welcome, dear," she replied as she pulled her into a quick hug.

"It was great," Jim added; "Thank you for inviting me."

"Anytime," she smiled; giving him a quick hug. "Drive safely; I'm trusting you with my prized possession."

"I'm always extra careful with her; I wouldn't want to face your wrath," he quipped.

"That's for sure," Naomi said with a light laugh as he turned toward Frank.

"Mr. McKenzie," he said offering him his hand to shake once again. "It was nice to meet you."

"You can just make that Frank," Frank stated as he shook his hand. "It was nice to meet you as well."

Jim stepped aside so that Johanna could say goodnight to her father, a part of him wondering how that would go since things were so tense between them. "Goodnight, Dad," Johanna said; her voice somewhat quiet.

Frank regarded her for a second, a look in his eyes that Jim couldn't completely decipher; one that seemed to speak of regret, a small measure of love and something unnamed that he just couldn't figure out. He moved toward her, pulling his daughter into a hug with both arms this time, one that wasn't for show…clearly one that wasn't meant to mean something.

Jim watched as Johanna stiffened in the embrace, her arms not going around him until Frank tightened his hold on her and then he saw her body relax, her arms going around him as she sank into his hug. He watched her breathe in her father's scent as her eyes squeezed shut and he had a feeling that tears lingered behind her eyelids. Frank held her for a long minute, his hand moving to brush over her hair and then he pulled back and pressed a kiss to her forehead. "Goodnight, Josie."

She gave a nod and then grabbed her purse and returned to Jim's side, her hand slipping into his as they said their goodbyes and slipped out the door. Johanna breathed deeply; allowing the chilly December air to sting her lungs; the meeting she had dreaded was finally over…there wouldn't be anymore worries or lectures about it; it would be one less weight on her shoulders.

"See," Jim said quietly as they made their way to the car; "We got through it."

"Thank God," she murmured; weariness sweeping through her. "Let's go home."

---

Jim raked his fingers through his hair later that night as he made his way from the bathroom to Johanna's bedroom after getting ready for bed. "Do you feel better now, Jo?" he asked as he stepped into the room but his question went unanswered; pulling his gaze to the bed. His fiancée was curled up on her side of the bed, sound asleep as Johnny Carson played on the television. She must've fallen asleep quickly, he mused as he moved around the bed to climb in on his side; after all, she had been awake when he went to get ready for bed and he hadn't been gone for more than a few minutes.

He settled into his spot and he smiled a little as he looked down at her sleeping face; her jaw no longer carrying that look of tension that it had held all week. He carefully slipped the remote out from under her hand and laid it on the nightstand, leaving the TV on as she preferred. Jim thought about waking her so that they could talk a little but he held back. The drive home had been mostly quiet with the exception of generic comments about the evening they had. He had thought that maybe she'd discuss it more once they were settled in at her apartment but she had merely popped an Advil and looked over papers for work the next morning and then packed her briefcase and placed it with her purse as always. He had made some subtle comments about the evening as they watched a little television but Johanna's responses had been simple and hadn't told him the full depth of her feelings about anything that had occurred at the McKenzie home. She also didn't mention anything about her hasty exit from the living room and retreat upstairs at one point during the evening…nor had she mentioned whatever she and Naomi had discussed while upstairs. He supposed it was private…that really he had no right to pry into the conversation she had with her mother; if she wanted him to know, she'd tell him.

The urge to wake her persisted; he wanted to dig deeper into her feelings about his finally meeting her father. He wanted to know if she was relieved; if she now knew that she had worried for nothing. Jim also supposed that there was a part of him that wanted to know if she was somewhat proud of how well he had handled everything…wanted to assure her that he'd always have her back against the man and his barbs. But he couldn't wake her; he didn't have the heart to nudge her from her slumber. She had a headache; she was clearly exhausted…he knew she hadn't been sleeping well; that she had been stressed and upset about the demand her father had made. No, he couldn't wake her just for chit chat; that could wait. Tonight she needed sleep and security.

With that thought in mind, Jim clicked off the lamp and then brushed a soft kiss against Johanna's lips as he wrapped an arm around her. His fiancée shifted closer in her sleep; snuggling as close as she could get; her hand curling into his shirt. He breathed deeply, the scent of her strawberry soap and shampoo filling his senses as he exhaled slowly. He had passed the father-in-law test. He wasn't quite sure how he had managed it; after all, he did throw Frank's indiscretion at the Blue Moon in his face…basically admitted that he had taken Johanna on a road trip the summer before to get her away from him…and had bluntly told the man he wouldn't stand by while he treated her badly.

And somehow, Frank McKenzie had been alright with that. In fact, he had even seemed to like it. It was all so unexpected.

Jim looked up at the ceiling, the soft sound of the television keeping the room from complete silence. He hadn't thought for a moment that Frank would like him…in fact he had been pretty sure that the man would hate him…and he hadn't minded the idea that Frank would hate him; but then the man had to go and change the game plan; proclaiming his acceptance. It had been a relief…and it had also felt strange. He wasn't sure he wanted Frank to like him…God knew he didn't want to like the man…and yet when the conversation was about anything other than Johanna; he found Frank to be easy to talk to about things such as sports, business and politics. If he hadn't known who he was and had sat next to Frank at the bar; he would've enjoyed the conversation over a beer. But Frank wasn't someone he talked to at the bar…he was Johanna's father…the father that didn't treat her very well…and he didn't want to like him; he didn't deserved to be liked when it was clear that he didn't value the gift he been given in the form of Johanna.

Jim pulled the covers more snuggly over Johanna and tightened his hold on her; her father might not value her but he did and he always would…and no amount of pleasant talk with Frank would change his opinion of him. It was only his odd sense of easy approval that had made him seem slightly likeable, he thought to himself. He wasn't going to like him though; he would merely tolerate him for Johanna's sake; just as she did her best to tolerate his mother for his sake. He shifted a little, making himself more comfortable while he kept hold of his fiancée; telling himself to shove his thoughts away until another day. It was over; he had finally met the 'infamous Frank McKenzie' as Johanna had called him…there hadn't been bloodshed or poisonings and no comments against the idea of them marrying. That was all that mattered; they had gotten through it without a hitch…now the only thing left was to share the news with his mother. Jim smiled as he closed his eyes; he couldn't wait until Christmas morning when he'd break the news…he just couldn't wait to see the look on Elizabeth's face. He was going to be sure to take his camera; he'd want pictures so he could share the moment with Johanna later on. It was going to be a Christmas to remember, that was for sure.

Author's Note: Elizabeth gets the news in the next chapter!