I just realized this is the longest chapter yet with the most words so enjoy. Shout out to T. Rycbar who is currently napping so that she doesn't have to deal with the stress of her modern office. It's caused us all to go into a depression. Anyways, I would love comments if you can spare the time. Obviously, I love all my ghost readers too, but the comments just give me so much serotonin.

This one is dedicated to my puppy, Samuel who's coming home tomorrow.

IDon'tOwnMarvel

"Please tell me what's going on." I asked, holding the darkened orb close to my chest with a lump of dread in my throat.

"Your universe," She explained solemnly, "Its light has gone out."

"What does that mean?" I looked between her eyes and tightened my grip on the ball.

She cast her eyes away, unable to meet my gaze. "It means that wherever you came from...it doesn't exist anymore."

My hands finally released the ball when I looked down at it in shock. "It's gone?"

As if on command, the ball fell apart in thin air, dissipating in a flurry of blue sparks. They drifted for only a moment before they too vanished into the void between worlds, leaving my hands empty. It wasn't possible. I was just there two months ago. Laughing about some joke Ellie used to overuse with my mom, going to school and seeing my friends, complaining about the terrible food in the cafeteria - that all had to still be there. It just didn't click in my head.

"Does - does that mean…" I choked out, already fearing what I was trying to ask.

"Everything." She nodded, still refusing to meet my eyeline. "And...everyone."

I felt my breath hitch when someone twisted a knife in my stomach. It wasn't true. I had just been there. It didn't look like ruins when I left. They had to still be there...but the Ancient One wouldn't lie, would she?

"How did this happen?" I demanded quietly, feeling a sense of anger rising deep within my chest. It couldn't be true.

My mind still swirled with the memory of what I had been told- what I had witnessed. I really didn't believe her. Something just wasn't connecting the dots in my brain because, well, it didn't make much sense. They had to still be there. I had been there not too long ago and everything looked fine up until the point where I blacked out.

I walked alongside the Ancient One, still trying to register both what was happening around me and what had happened before until she dropped me off in a room. Steve came along too and stayed in the room with me even after the Ancient One gave him directions to his own and took her leave. I think he asked me a question at one point but I didn't hear him or...maybe I did but I couldn't figure out what he was saying? It was hard to tell at that point.

What even am I if they aren't there? I sat down on the bed. All I can think about is my family when I should be thinking about everyone else. Seven billion people gone? Impossible.

Steve must have given up trying to get my attention because when I actually looked up, he was gone, leaving me with just myself and my backpack on the bed. The backpack that wasn't my own. Come to think of it, most of what I had now wasn't even my own. I had lost my clothes after Hydra, my phone when I first fell, I hadn't a single thing left of my reality other than my own body. I had nothing really.

I am nothing in comparison. I shook my head at my own thoughts and returned my gaze to my lap, wrapping my arms around my stomach. They had to be there. Seven billion people on Earth and not a single one left? Not one planet? Star? Hell, I'd accept a rock at this point.

It was just illogical. Just...not possible.

It's not true. I finally determined, rolling over onto my side to lay down on the bed.

But no matter how much I kept repeating that line to myself - not true not true not true not true - I only lasted a few seconds before tears started to fall over the bridge of my nose and down the side of my face. I gritted my teeth and closed my eyes, trying to will myself awake like I had done on the first day. In my failed attempts, I did eventually just cry myself to sleep. Because...well, what else could I do? For all my bravado and witty one-liners, I am just one stupid, ordinary person. And for the second time in my life, I've been left completely and utterly alone.

"Ellie, I really can't!" I giggled, trying to pull out of her grip.

"Come on, Linx!" She groaned comically and tugged me closer. "It's just one roller coaster. Then I won't bother you for the rest of the trip."

She crossed her heart with her hand signifying a promise before pulling me along towards the ride with less resistance from me.

"I am so getting you back for this." I grumbled, following along with a sick feeling in my gut. "I also get to design the car and pick the color."

"Deal."

We moved along through the line, Ellie practically buzzing in excitement while I tried not to feel sick at the idea of riding a roller coaster. Eventually we made it to the screens. Ellie wanted the sports car that looked like Bumblebee, but I went for the one that was shaped like Bulkhead just to get on her nerves. Bulkhead was always cooler anyways. She did hate that choice, and in retaliation, maxed out the power while I changed the color to green.

I may or may not have screamed the entire time while Ellie whooped with laugher and glee. Our parents were still wandering around the 'World Showcase' thing when we got off, no doubt to test some of the food and drinks. Ellie and I (mostly Ellie) had made the smarter decision of wandering around on our own. I probably would have preferred wandering around and buying way too much Japanese candy.

"Oh my god, you always were the baby." Ellie grinned, still riding whatever messed up high she got from those rides and snatched the hat off the top of my head.

"Hey!" I shouted, chasing after her and attempting to steal it back. "I am 12 minutes older than you! I'm your elder."

"Yeah, you sure act like one." She stuck her tongue out at me and flopped the hat on her own head. "Look, I'm you."

I woke up again, blinking away the fond memory when I slowly remembered where I was. The space just made whatever faint smile I had on my face disappear into nothing. I sat up with the early sun of Nepal just barely peeking through the window near the roof. My backpack had fallen off the bed and the blankets were still drawn up from me never going under them. Standing on shaky legs, I made my way over to the door and stopped just before it when I spotted the note on the desk.

'Captain Rogers- First door on the left

Breakfast- Take a left and cross the courtyard

Ancient One- Across the courtyard up the stairs.'

I put it back down and looked at the door. I wasn't entirely sure who had left it but I was feeling a bit too weighed down at the moment to take advantage of the directions. Sitting down again on the bed, I pulled the phone out of the bag and flipped it over, inspecting it. After a moment, I cracked open the back and gave the stray metal chip sitting in there a good stare. It was pretty obvious that it didn't belong, especially because of the small 'Stark industries' logo on the back of it while a second logo was on a separate and much bigger part.

It only took me a second to dig what nails I had under it and snap it off, dropping it onto the floor in front of me. I didn't really need anyone tracking me down. Not right now at least.

However, I paused with my foot over it. If I break it here, they're going to come looking in the last known location and I don't want Shield or even Tony to know about these guys yet.

I picked it up again off the floor and started towards the door with more purpose in my step despite the heavy weight over my shoulders. The boxes in my head from my visit with Hydra seemed trivial, petty even, compared to this. I rolled my shoulders, trying to alleviate at least some of the weight when I made my way across the courtyard and up the stairs. There weren't too many people around to see me at this time other than a few people meditating in the sun beams that fell on the ground. It looked nice.

Knocking on the door turned out to be unnecessary since it opened before I could rap my knuckles on it a second time. The Ancient One was meditating on the floor with her eyes closed, and so I immediately began to back out of the room again, not wanting to accidentally spark the anger of one of the most powerful beings on Earth. Plus, watching someone meditate felt super awkward.

But she broke the silence before I had the chance to leave. "Is there something I can help you with?"

I opened my mouth to speak, only to close it again quickly when the words got caught in my throat.

Standing up, she made her way over to the small table where she poured tea into a second cup. All I could do was hold out the small metal piece in response when words just refused to come out of my mouth.

She looked at it once and then back into my eyes, hitting me hard with a weird sense of calm. "What is it?"

"A tracker, o-or a bug maybe." I spoke just loud enough for her to hear. "I don't know. I found it in my phone."

She hummed in understanding and tilted her head at me a little. "What would you like to do about it?"

"I can't keep it here," I started, finding my voice a little better. "I know they'll come for me after a while if I don't get rid of it, but if I break it...they might just show up anyway."

"I see." She murmured, taking it from me gently and inspecting it. Then, without another word, she generated a small sparkly portal and dropped it in, then taking the second cup of tea and offering it to me.

I looked down at the tea and swirled it in the cup, my curiosity quickly getting the best of me. "Where'd you put it?"

"SHIELD's helicarrier." She smiled slightly as if messing with SHIELD was one of her favorite pastimes. "They'll be too busy searching themselves to come here."

Even though I didn't want to admit it to myself, the thought was kind of funny. Fury would probably be pretty pissed.

The Ancient One beckoned me with her hand and I followed after her, down the stairs and into the dining area. Since it was still pretty early, there weren't many people around. I just sat opposite of her and accepted the small bowl of fruit that she handed me. I probably would have forgotten to eat, but since she was watching me, I took a few slow bites. She only spoke again when I had noticed the fact that I actually was hungry and got halfway through my bowl.

"You are welcome to stay in this dimension." She stated carefully, watching my unnerved reaction. "It may not be the same as your old one but I don't see you posing a threat in our timeline with the right mindset."

I don't belong here, what am I doing? I swallowed hard, pausing my eating. "What about the power I have? Literal and... physical, I guess."

She tried to make eye contact with me while I actively avoided it. "You must know that I have no problem defending your place here. You've done nothing wrong and already learned the consequences of tampering too severely with time. I believe you can actually be quite helpful here...given time to learn, that is."

I nodded slowly, staring hard at my bowl while trying not to crumple under the heavy weight on my shoulders.

"How did this happen?"

"Are you familiar with the name Dormammu?" She asked slowly.

"Yeah, Dr. Strange has to fight him." I muttered, still partially trapped in my head while I attempted to process what I had seen. My universe had just vanished...like it never existed. Like they never existed.

"He is the reason your world is gone." She stated, now being the one trying to catch my gaze. "It was a horrible thing. Your universe was so small and young - almost childlike. But he...he only sees what can be consumed. It didn't stand a chance, though I'm sure it put up quite the fight."

My stomach burned a hole in my middle, this time out of fear. "I didn't get killed. Why am I still here?"

"Chance." She dusted her fingers over another dark universe before it too dissipated. "You were thrown into the Empty between worlds, hurtling through it at insurmountable speeds until…until you went so fast you fell through the barrier of another universe."

If someone were to punch me in the gut, surely it would have felt better than this. I couldn't remember any of that. I would remember that kind of terrifying thing, right?

"This power you have, it comes from the barriers you fell through." She went on, "It's not something I wish you were burdened with."

The Ancient One waved a hand methodically in the air until we were both standing in the center of the room. My standing only lasted for a moment though before I fell with my legs too weak to keep me up and my eyes turned to my hands.

"As for your...predictive abilities. I will have to ask that you accept my offer to teach you."

My head came back out of the memory. "Teach me?"

"Yes." She confirmed, looking back at the door. "I will be in the room upstairs at 2 pm today if you are willing."

I nodded, noting that she had gotten up and left already, taking both the tea cups with her and leaving me alone at the table. With an already uneasy stomach, I stood a few moments later and dumped the excess fruit in their compost bin before leaving the dining hall altogether while more people took advantage of the meal space. Walking back to my room, I just barely managed to avoid eye contact with Steve who had happened to be walking in the opposite direction.

The man gave me a small smile but I honestly couldn't return it and instead just ducked into my room, shutting the door behind me. It literally only took him half a minute to open up the door again when I sat down on the bed and scooted so that my back was against the wall.

"Where'd you go this morning?" He asked, shutting the door behind him sitting down at the desk.

I didn't look up at him and crossed my arms over my chest, shrugging lightly. "Removed a tracker from my phone. The Ancient One dropped it on the helicarrier, so they'll just be confused for a little bit."

"Yeah, that'll probably be pretty funny." Steve chuckled, letting his eyes wander around the room in our comfortable silence. "Is there any word about getting you home?"

I winced. It wasn't his fault necessarily since no one had told him yet. Regardless, it hurt an awful lot for him to bring it up. I felt my stomach threaten to throw out my half breakfast from earlier when it twisted uncomfortably.

There is no going home. Home is gone. Everything is gone. I bit my tongue at the intrusive thoughts. Why did I live? I don't deserve to live any more than the rest of them.

Clearing my throat awkwardly, I tried to keep the emotions at bay when I answered. "I can't. It's not there."

Steve almost immediately tensed up and gave me a concerned look. "What do you mean?"

Great, you gonna cry about it now? I rubbed my eyes quickly and smartly misplaced the anger. "I mean that it's gone. Seven billion individual people all lost forever. Children too, Steve. Two billion children didn't get the stupid chance I got and instead got trapped on a planet where they had to feel their skin burning and charring. There is no home left for me. Not anymore."

The weight of my words hit not only the super soldier in the corner of the room, but also myself. How come I didn't burn with the rest of them?

I had stolen the chance from any number of those kids who could have lived full and probably normal lives here. The mere idea of it just made me feel sick. I was horribly selfish to take something like that from them. Not just them, but my parents and friends too. Now all I could do was worry about my family and friends when so many other people had fallen victim to him. Selfish - that's what I was.

I drew my legs up to my chest and huddled in the back corner of the bed with tears already falling.

Crying? Really? You know who can't cry anymore? Infants. Toddlers. Innocent people will never have the chance to cry or laugh or feel anything ever again and you're fucking crying about it? You don't get to feel. Not when they can't.

My own mental berating only made my quiet tears turn into actual sobs while I hugged myself closer. I wasn't going to see anyone ever again. My parents would never hug me, I wouldn't sleep in the same bed - People died and all you can think about is your bed.

I couldn't pay attention to the room anymore as I tried to calm my own emotions. I was nothing short of a wreck, crying over the loss of all those people, all those places that would be forgotten. Forgotten and never known by anyone except me. The bed dipped slightly but I couldn't care, not until I felt the arm going over my shoulders. As I hesitantly leaned into the touch, my crying slowly dissipated into ragged breathing. I had run out of tears.

Tony had continuously returned back to the monitor to track Lincoln's location while she moved. While at first, she just travelled via plane to New York from Malibu, there was one moment that bothered him. The tracker blanked out in New York, making him frown in wonder until he zoomed out and spotted it just sitting in Nepal like it had always been there. He was sure it wasn't glitching. His technology didn't do that. After numerous checks, he couldn't for the life of him figure out how that had happened or if she actually was in Nepal. Then, when he came back hours later, the tracker was over the Atlantic. Jarvis confirmed the second unexplainable jump too.

He ran the checks again to see if she was tampering with it from SHIELD, but even those came up empty. After a while he just accepted the fact that maybe she was more sneaky with her coding than he was despite the need to call SHIELD just to verify. She did, after all, manage to acquire a ticket to New York in under half an hour when she disappeared. If Tony was being totally honest, he just expected her to go for a walk and cool down, not jump on a plane and fly across the country.

The first few times Bruce caught him watching the tracker, he told Tony that sleeping was a thing too. It should have been fine too from those spare moments he slept, but when the tracker jumped over the ocean, they decided to get in touch with Fury just for their own peace of mind.

"She's with you, right?" Tony asked, pacing in the garage and holding the phone to his ear with Bruce watching him precariously.

"Who?" Fury's voice asked back.

"You know who." Tony continued impatiently. "The child prophet - Lincoln."

"She slipped by two days ago when she said she'd demonstrate the energy bursts for us." Fury said, sounding less than amused. "I got her a plane ticket, but she slipped by at the airport. We figured she went back to you-"

"She doesn't know how to work the electricity thing and she's not here." Tony interrupted, getting more anxious by the second. "She told Banner she was with Cap."

"Apparently." He grumbled, "Captain Rogers went missing 12 hours ago. He went AWOL when I sent an agent to the airport to retrieve her."

"Great, we've managed to get her kidnapped twice in 6 weeks." Tony snapped the phone shut and leaned on the desk in an annoyed huff. If she was going to be this difficult, Tony would have appreciated some sort of warning so that he didn't have a heart attack every time she decided to hop off the grid.

"Do you think she made it back home?" Bruce asked from his place by the desk.

"No." Tony tugged his hand through his hair and sat down in front of the monitor used to track the kid. "Golden Boy's missing too. As much as I hate the guy, I really hope he hasn't left her side."

Lincoln had left her laptop behind too making it all that much harder to track and find her. He didn't know if she had done that on purpose, but it wasn't like it mattered now. All he knew was that she was currently 'missing' and with little to no way to locate her. It was frustrating to say in the least. In a last ditch attempt, he turned in his chair to face the other man in the room.

"Bruce can you try calling her?"

He hadn't considered it before because if she was kidnapped, she just wouldn't pick up or answer. Now they knew that she was most likely with Steve and possibly even the person she said she was going to find in the first place. She could answer the phone now if she really wanted to.

"Hello?"

"Steve?" Banner sat up with the phone already in speaker mode, piquing Tony's interest. "Why do you have Lincoln's phone?"

Steve paused for a moment in thought. "She can't answer right now."

"Well why not? Where are you?" Tony was already trying to track the call from his computer with the help from Jarvis.

"She's upset - " Steve sighed, "Look, she told me I can't stay on the line for more than a minute, so make it quick."

Tony looked between Bruce and the computer for a moment before turning it off begrudgingly. "Is she safe?"

"Yeah, she's safe. I have to go. Bye, guys."

The phone line cut off abruptly and Tony sat back again in his chair. Part of him regretted turning off the tracking of the call, but it was probably the best thing for her. Obviously she wasn't too keen on being bothered right now, but the fact that at least one person was aware of her location was comforting. Bruce, by the looks of it, was almost as relieved as Tony felt.

At least she's safe.

I had originally asked Steve not to answer the phone, but he was persistent enough to the point where I didn't fight him on it. He had claimed that they should at least know if I was okay, and quite honestly, I couldn't argue with that. It wasn't like I was entitled to letting anyone else suffer with my current record. Plus, he promised not to stay on the line for long. The last thing I needed was SHIELD or Tony digging up this place and getting killed or killing someone else.

Listening to the conversation outside wasn't on my top list of priorities, so instead I just waited until Steve came back into the room, looking less tense than before. He sat back down at the desk and waited. What for, I couldn't really tell.

Come on, you can't just sit there and mope. It's unfair to everyone else.

Unfair? Really? You wanna talk about unfair-

I stood up quickly, shutting out my thoughts for the moment before turning in a full circle, looking around. There had to be something here to do. What did Dr. Strange spend all his time doing when he was here? Reading probably.

"What is it?" Steve asked, having not stood when I did.

"I'm going to the library." I stated plainly. "Do you want to come?"

Steve was very clearly alarmed by this difference in attitude, but stood up and followed me out the door anyways. It took me one wrong turn and directions from two different people before I managed to track it down. Wong was sitting at the front desk with a book out in front of him, completely unbothered by us until I waved politely.

He just gave me a weird look that mimicked a mixture of confusion and annoyance.

"I was wondering if you had any books in English." I said, standing in front of the desk across from him with Steve not far behind.

He stared, uninterested. "Who are you?"

"Lincoln."

He nodded his head towards the man behind me. "And?"

"Steve."

Wong stood and walked into the library without another word and the two of us on his tail. "The Ancient One wants you to start with the laws and chain of events. That means….'From Eternity to Here', 'The Tyd', and 'Codex Imperium'."

He dropped them in my arms and stalked off in another direction. Steve followed him but I set the books down at a table and looked over them, trying to decide which one to start with. They all looked equally dull with a slight exception being 'Codex Imperium'. That one only got interesting points because of the name though.

Steve came back a minute later and sat down across from me holding a book of his own. I waved at the librarian again as he walked back to the front desk. "Bye, Wong."

His shoulders stiffened slightly, but he didn't turn around and just returned to reading at his desk. He kind of reminded me of Happy sometimes. You know, just significantly more dangerous.

"What'd Wong get for you?" I muttered the question, scanning the covers of the books.

"A History of the Sanctums."

I nodded. It was good that they were only giving him history books. He isn't exactly the kind of guy I need practicing magic or channelling inter dimensional energy. It also holds the chance of messing with the chain of events if he starts picking up new skills like that. I eventually decided on starting with 'The Tyd' but after about one page my mind wandered again. It was starting to turn into a serious problem...

What the hell are you even doing here? How come you get to live? You're not special. Now you're just making yourself feel better by putting in extra work. You shouldn't be here, you should be with them. I winced and ran my fingers through my hair. Wow, now you feel bad? Wanna know who can't feel bad? The 1.9 billion dead children-

Turning away from my thoughts quickly, I glanced at the clock. I still had an hour. Steve was very into whatever book he was reading so I tried to refocus my attention back on the book in front of me. That barely lasted a minute as my mind kept relentlessly spinning back towards the disintegrating universe.

Everything was in it. I have nothing left.

Stop wallowing.

I wrinkled my nose in distaste before standing up again with my books. Maybe a change in location could be beneficial.

"You leaving?" Steve asked, looking at me carefully. "Already?"

I took a deep breath, trying to push out my thoughts. "Yeah, just back to my room. You can stay."

"Okay." He nodded slowly, then turning back to his book. "I'll be here or in my room."

Bookworm. I walked back up to the front desk hugging my books to my chest. "Is it alright if I take these back to my room?"

He barely mumbled a response. "Mhm. 7 days."

At that, I turned on my heel and left. I took my time with the walk and watched a few of the sparring matches take place. The Ancient One spotted me watching from where she too was observing the battles. I just ducked away and moved back to my room, putting the books on the desk with little direction on what I was supposed to do next.

You know what is weird? I frowned to myself. She already knew I was going to be at the library.

My eye caught the phone on the corner of my bed. I badly wanted to talk to Clint or Tony. It kind of felt like a little bit of a dick move to disappear on them like that. Then I felt even worse for having dragged Steve along. He really shouldn't be here. Surely he had more important things to do with his life. Not only that, but he was also being exposed to all sorts of crazy things that he shouldn't be learning about. The level of change and pain that I was unintentionally causing caught me by surprise and before I knew what I was doing, I dialed for Clint.

The phone clicked, signifying an answer. "Hello?"

I felt my heart lurch at the voice, but managed to compose myself fast enough. "Hi."

"Lincoln?" He asked quickly, sounding worried. "Where are you? SHIELD's all freaked out that their latest asset up and disappeared on them."

"I-" I choked on the words, wrapping an arm around my stomach. "I'm sorry."

Sorry for what? Sorry for abandoning them? Sorry for jumping ship as soon as things got serious? Sorry for being a fucking wuss?

"Sorry for what?" He could be heard pacing over the phone. "Link, come back."

The words got caught in my throat again and I had to pause a moment. "I can't. Not for a little bit at least."

"Okay..." He started slowly. "Are you going home? Tony said you were meeting with someone."

"No." I sniffled, rubbing away tears. "I can't."

Jesus, you're crying? Really? Remember who can't cry-

"I'm sorry," He paused a moment in silent thought before his voice came back through, more pleading this time. "Please come back. We can keep you safe here."

"I have to stay," I attempted to force back the emotions building up in my gut. "I'm gonna send Steve back too. Please don't come looking for me."

"Link-"

"I'll see you in a bit."

I lowered the phone to my lap and hung up before flopping backwards on the bed. The least I could do was call them myself. I mean, it wasn't super informative, but now he knew I was alive. He did earn the right to get an actual answer from me instead of the man I had dragged along on this little journey. The phone was tossed aside when it buzzed again and ignored in favor of the books on the desk.

'The Tyd' book turned out to be at least a little interesting when I read the first few chapters. I'm not gonna lie, I skimmed a few parts and tried to get to the more interesting chapters. After a while though, I got really sucked in and was able to effectively shut out my thoughts while I learned about how time could change to correct itself. That was pretty helpful since I had started to become more worried about the stuff that I said early on without thinking much on the consequences. It wasn't like all the corrections and consequences were bad. For example, Bucky was currently with the updated and much safer SHIELD while he made a recovery from being the Winter Soldier. See? Not all bad.

I almost caught myself losing track of time and found that the next time I looked at the time on the phone it was already really close to the appointment I had with the Ancient One. Abandoning my books on the desk, I trekked back through the halls in the direction of her office. It was when I made the turn to the courtyard that I ran smack into someone else.

"Oh, I'm sorry - " I cut myself off when I stared back at the man I had run into.

He just chuckled lightly. "It's alright. I wasn't watching where I was going."

I could only gape for a moment before I shut my mouth and reminded myself that he wasn't a villain yet. "Yeah, no. It's okay. I wasn't watching either."

Kaecilius just gave me an apologetic smile, holding his book closer to his chest. "I have seen you around. Are you studying here too?"

"Oh," I cleared my throat, not keen on sharing my knowledge with a future villain. "Uh, just - just for a little bit. Probably not very long."

"That's a shame." He stepped around me, his back facing the direction I came. "Mordo keeps beating me in sparring. Maybe you'll help me gang up on him one of these days."

"Yeah, maybe." I chuckled nervously, looking over my shoulder. "Sorry, I'm gonna be late for something. See you around."

"Bye, uh... " He paused, waiting for a name.

I just spat out the first one that came to mind. "Jack. You can - you can call me Jack."

"Kaecilius." He stuck out his hand and shook mine. "Best not be late."

"Right." I turned quickly after that with my heart ready to beat out of my chest and walked quickly across the courtyard. When I stopped in front of the Ancient One's door, I had to pause a minute to catch my breath and cool my features.

Remember, he's not bad yet. He's just a regular guy who's training to be an all-powerful wizard.

I was able to relax again when I joined the Ancient One in her office/study. She got right to business, demonstrating what it was I was going to be learning there. It had become very clear that I was actually not going to be learning anything magic-wise, but instead focusing on building up my strength and harnessing the energy I already had in me. Whatever the purple stuff was, I was going to be learning how to use it.

"You are going to need some things to start." She stated, accepting a book of sorts from one of the other wizards in the room while we sat at the table.

I just narrowed my eyes at her. "Like what?"

She held out the small book for me to look at. As it turned out, it was actually a small leather-bound notebook with black letters etched across the top that spelled out my name. Some pages had lines while others just had empty space. It was a really nice journal too, bringing the smallest smile to my face.

"What's it for?" I asked, tracing my fingers over the engraved and painted name.

"Your knowledge."

Wait. I frowned at her suspiciously. "Isn't that...dangerous?"

"Do not misinterpret my intentions." She dismissed the look quickly. "I do not wish to read it. That journal is for your eyes only."

I looked back down at it. "I mean - I'm not ungrateful or anything, but we can't exactly enforce that kind of thing. Even if you don't want to read it, other people might."

Other people like Kaecilius...

The Ancient One barely batted an eye, taking a sip of her tea. "It's been encrypted with a spell of my own making. Only you can read and see the words you've written. When it isn't in use, it will be locked away from prying eyes. Even if they could read it, that is."

"Locked away where?" I inquired carefully, feeling a little better about this plan.

I may have also been a little relieved to have somewhere to keep track of my information. That did bring up other reminders though. I was actually going to be here long enough to use the information. It was a little bit of a disheartening fact.

"Wong will be keeping a close eye on it in our library." She offered me a pencil. "It will have a place beside the other books in my private collection as the only knowledge in Kamar-Taj that is forbidden."

"Cryptic." I murmured, accepting the pencil while she relayed another message.

"I would recommend writing when you are in a private location and locking it away when you plan on leaving it somewhere."

I nodded and held the journal and pencil closer when she stood up. "Why are you being so nice to me?"

She didn't even acknowledge the question and just opened the door, letting me out. "I know you won't be staying very long, but do read some of the books. I've heard skimming is just as effective."

A frown found its way to my face when I stopped outside the door to face her. "I won't be?"

"No," She smiled slightly out of amusement. "You never do. You miss the ones you left behind."

And with that, she closed the door, leaving me alone with my thoughts once again. Miss the ones I left behind? Yeah I'll miss them, but it's a selfish move to go back. Selfish is what I am now. Wasting my days where someone else could have done more. I was selfish. I was happy about a gift I received. You know who can't-

I shook my head at them and wandered back to my room with the journal held close to my chest. It was placed on the desk before I stepped back and stared at it. I couldn't write in it now, could I? The pencil was still in my hand. To be fair though, I had no idea where I was supposed to start. My mom was always the one who knew what was going on and had her life down and organized.

Mom. I winced. I really missed them. There wasn't a moment in my mind when I could remember being so desperately in need of a hug from one of my parents. Hell, I'd even settle for a visit to Ellie's grave. I'm not selfish for wanting that, right?

I slowly moved back to the desk and sat down. I guess I'll start there.

The first five pages of my journal held specific information about my dimension that I couldn't bear to forget. I put my highschool art classes to work too, sketching both my parents and Ellie from memory. That was probably one of the funnier things about me - my artistic talent ended with faces. If someone wanted me to draw a body, it would turn out horrendously disproportionate. I was no real artist, but the memory of them was still fresh enough in my mind for me to put them on paper, so this was probably as good a time as any. It's not like I have any pictures of them anyways.

When I finished with the five pages of complete sadness and one or two tear stains, I brought myself to flip the page and start working on profiles. I started by jotting down the names of all the people I had met so far as well as all the names I could drag off the top of my head from later on. It was only being laid out with where the information needed to go before I was rudely interrupted by a knocking on my door.

Steve walked in, catching me in the act with my new journal. "What've you got there?"

I shrugged lightly, trying to remember how to spell Ulysses Klaue. "A notebook. The Ancient One gave it to me."

He was very obviously peering over my shoulder to look at it. "That's neat. Are you gonna write anything in it?"

I turned to look at him funny before returning my gaze to the book. Suspiciously, I picked it up and held it out to him, flipping the pages a few times. "You don't see words?"

"No," He replied slowly, eyebrows knitted in confusion. "That's a nice sketch though."

"Huh." I mused, putting the journal back down. It was interesting how he could see the drawings but not the actual paragraphs of information. Shaking my head at the discovery, I looked back at him. "Did you need something?"

"I came to see if you wanted to come to dinner." He shifted a little, looking back at the door. "I'd go alone but most of the people here don't seem to like me."

"Yeah, okay." I agreed, picking up the journal and pencil to follow him out of the room.

Why should you get to eat? They can't. I quickly bit back my own self-destructive thoughts in favor of the smell of good food.

I got myself a bean bowl and ate it carefully while my mind tried to stop me. I was really hungry, no matter how angry my thoughts were. Crying in front of Steve was bad enough. I don't want to seem too pathetic in front of him, and refusing to eat would probably make the list. But I did take periodic breaks through the meal to add his portrait to my notebook, stealing small glances at him while he was occupied by some magic thing or another. I wasn't planning on adding his information until I was back in my room. His face, on the other hand, was going to be a lot easier with a reference right in front of me. If he noticed me staring, he didn't seem to care.

"Steve," I started, taking in a deep breath. I was not prepared for this conversation at all, but sucked it up and ripped off the band-aid. "I think you should go back to New York."

Said man paused his eating to look at me. "That's too bad. I found a sparring buddy today. He used some magic thing and won though, so I'm not really sure if it was a fair match to begin with-"

"I'm being serious." I interrupted quietly, shifting in my seat. "It's nice to have you here, don't get me wrong, but I still think it's risky to let you spend more time here than you need to."

He thought for a moment, looking around at the room before back at me "Are you sure about this?"

I nodded and poked the empty bowl with my spoon. "Yeah, I don't want to change anything too much. Most things turn out alright as long as it goes a certain way. I don't, however, know how anything will go if you decide to become a wizard."

His face broke into a short smile at the mention of becoming a wizard. "Will you be coming back?"

I tried to look anywhere but at him, then fixing my gaze on my bowl. There was no definitive answer for that. Sure, the Ancient One had said that I would be, but spending my time with people who were constantly fighting villains didn't seem like a great idea. Then again, I was lacking some direction in this strange world. Who knows where I'll be a year from now?

"I think so." I decided finally, meeting his gaze with just a touch of confidence. Maybe I will go back. Who knows? It's not like I want to stick around here for when Kaecilius starts worshipping the very thing that killed everything I ever loved.

Steve threw his bag together after a dinner with Lincoln and some guy who she managed to befriend that very day. They went together to the magical double doors where Master Drumm was waiting on the other side to escort him out of the Sanctum. Standing in front of the door, Steve caught on to the sad look she had, despite how well she thought she was masking it.

She stuck out her hand for him to shake. "Don't go snitching on me just yet, alright?"

"You got it." He offered her a comforting smile and turned to leave, only to be stopped seconds later by a tugging on his sleeve.

"Uh, Steve?"

He turned back around in time to catch her rub her eyes with her sleeve. "Yeah?"

"The homesick feeling - " She started nervously, eyes cast towards the ground. "Does it go away?"

With a small sigh, he crouched down like he had when he first met her to try and get a better look at her reactions. "Not right away. It's more about building a new home where you are than getting stuck thinking about past ones."

He wasn't prepared for the arms that wrapped around his neck in a hug. She held on tight for a moment, even when he stood again as if he might leave her alone too if she wasn't careful. "Good luck with the others."

"Thanks." He smiled, watching her step back awkwardly from the hug. "Call me if you need anything."

Once again, he turned to leave through the double doors. She was very obviously conflicted in one way or another about sending him back, so when she recommended it, he just agreed to make it easier on her. The odd Sanctum people did appear to be safer than any kind of protection SHIELD was going to give her while she was processing things anyways.

He did have to remind himself, though, that this whole experience, as weird as it was, gave him a leg up over his cinematic duo that Lincoln was so familiar with. Even if he did get his ass handed to him by a wizard. Repeatedly.