Travis returned for the day and saw Mr. L in his office. This did NOT make him happy.

Though L could not understand him, Travis spoke anyway. "Hey, dingus?! Get outta my room before I personally take the time to work that stupidhat straight up your-"

"Ah, Hi there, Squidboy! You have a nice office."

Travis stopped threatening to grab and move L out of his room.

"Hey! I wasn't done looking through your personal photos!"

Travis placed L in the hall outside of his office and shut the door. After some looking, indeed, L had been through everything.

After his shift, he went home and screamed as 3 jumped out from behind the door and grabbed his arm.

3 burst into a fit of laughter. "Dude, you should have seen your face!"

Travis frowned and pretended as if he were not happy, when he was actually impressed. Nothing had scared him that bad before.

It took no time to piss Travis after walking in. The house was not as messy as it could be, but some things that Travis liked in certain places were swapped with others. He was a tad miffed at it, but ignored it and went on with showering and putting on lounge clothing. He now wore a green tye-dye tee and polyester shorts that went a few inches above his knees.

3 highly questioned his sense of style, but questioned many more things when Travis turned on the TV to some show about criminals in town.

He quickly switched off the TV. It wasn't good to see yourself on the world's worst criminals channel.

3 hadn't seen anything bad about Travis, but he wasn't sure she trusted him enough to protect him from persecution.

Travis attempted to track the attention to 3. "So, how was that… 'work vacation'?"

"Oh, it was… fine. Just sustained some light injury and some pride issues."

What.

"Ooookay. Well, I actually had a-"

A thud came from the basement.

Shoot.

"What was that?"

Travis played it off the best he could. "Probably that leak again."

"A leak? You never told me about a-"

"Yes, there is a leak. It's a mess and you REALLY don't want to be down there." Travis meant to say normally, but felt a little bit mad then, so he grumbled it instead.

"Ok… are you okay?"

"I'm fine, thank you."

3 sat down on the opposite side of the couch.

Travis had turned back on the TV, but switched the display quickly. He fell asleep nearly instantly.

Day 2 of living without family to weigh him down. Travis had a horrid day at school. The others would trip him and they would tease and even more. Travis felt as if he were always bullied, so he decided to return three school years of torture.

One day, the bullies walked up to Travis and laughed, but they screamed as he dodged their attempt to grab him and slammed the first one into the wall.

"Woah, kid! Calm down-"

The bully shut up as Travis drove their head into the wall again. He wasn't smiling, he wasn't making any expression. He had the straightest face.

They tried to grab Travis, but he pulled out the knife he had stolen from the kitchen and swung it as hard as he could. Everyone in that room now had a stain of some sort on their shirt.

They all collapsed, with the exception of Travis. Travis took off his emerald sweater with stains on it and wrapped it around his waist.

He happily bounced out of the room and laughed a little.

Travis awoke and leaned up. He was asleep on the couch. 3 was nowhere to be found. It was morning.

Travis hopped awake and checked the date. In 3 days, or Wednesday, is… the… restaurant date…?

He ignored that for now and went to his room. He was really quite surprised when he saw 3 in his bed. She was sleeping soundly.

Travis took out his trusty switchblade and started playing with it.

Aren't you a cute little thing when you're sleeping… How nice.

He walked around the bed and quietly snickered. He slowly dragged the knife against the end of the bed. Using my bed and everything, it's a surprise I have such mercy on you. You naive, adorable, little pest. Well, not little, moreso large…

Travis put the knife away. Honestly, I don't know how to feel. He sharply retracted the knife, leaving a scratch on the bed. He put the knife away. You're right here. Right now. I could easily be rid of you. You could be out of my house- out of my hair! But that can wait.

Travis opened the closet in his room and took out the cleanest sweater he could find. He proceeded to take said sweater and put it on.

After getting dressed, he looked to 3, who was somehow still asleep.

"Must be a heavy sleeper…" Travis mumbled.

Upon hearing Travis whispering, 3 yawned and got up.

"Oh, hey Travis."

Or not.

The following day, Travis went to the basement and came out with a… bag. It was, as he called it, "Unneeded furniture."

3 didn't question it until she thought that she saw the bag move. She swore that it moved. Travis denied it.

Finally, Travis dumped the bag out in the hostage bunker. "There. Here is your new home!"

Marley jumped up and nearly threw up.

"What's wrong?" Travis teased. "Can't handle the smell?"

Marley looked around. "Where am I?"

"Where the last hostage was. Poor her. Unfortunately, sushi is still on the menu." Travis chuckled at his own joke.

"What are you-"

"Enjoy your stay, Marley."

Marley screamed and demanded for Travis to let him go, but Travis just smiled. "Aw. He's begging. It's highly ironic for someone who has a higher pay and place than me. How sadly pathetic."

Travis walked away, a cocky smirk on his face and an extra one added to his kill count.

The next day, Travis arrived to taunt Marley, only to find that he was gone.

Marley was gone. Nowhere to be found.

Travis angrily stomped out and stabbed a tree, to relieve stress.

Finally, Travis calmed down and took a moment to think.

Huh. When he said that he was with the government, I should have thought that through.

Travis sighed and went back home.

He proceeded to scream again as 3 jumped out. Again. In the same spot, too.

"This will NEVER get old!"

Travis sat down, clearly mad. Dumb agent guy…. Wasn't he on the reservations list?

Travis cracked a smile. Oh, he's really dead.

Finally, when the day had arrived, Travis planned to go to the restaurant alone. Notice the wordplay, "Planned"

His plans were violated when 3 came with.

Travis put on a nice suit, put his knife in the little inside pocket.

3 wore a nice dress. And the same dirty shoes.

They found their seats. Travis took a moment to look around. As he suspected. There were actually quite a lot of folk there, so he had to pretend to wait. He also ignored 3.

There he was. Marley was there. Travis was all of a sudden smiling.

3 was highly bored. She sat there and nearly fell asleep.

"Why did I want to go here again? Why am I here again?"

"You wanted to go."

3 groaned and planted her face into the table. Travis was getting highly impatient.

Now, let's wait.

Meanwhile…

Mario and co. sat down. The princess was awake now, and was fine. They were hungry, mostly.

They had reached a cave again. This one went deeper. Mario found himself intrigued and had gone down it. The others reluctantly followed.

"Mario, we should leave."

Mario shook his head. "Not until we find something to eat down here. I can still smell the fruit!"

They all sighed again. "Mario, we've been down here for an hour, I don't think there's fruit here."

Mario screamed and they all jumped. "WHAT, what?!'

Mario pointed and happily bounced.

A large fruit sat on a piece of elevated floor.

"A fruit. Speak of the devil."

"I go to church, so no, no I don't." Toad mumbled.

Mario rolled his eyes and ran to the fruit. "Now all we need is to get it down."

Mario jumped and found himself going about one, maybe half of, a foot.

"Any ideas, guys? Because my only plan, as of right now, is not working."

They all shrugged. Bowser grabbed Toad and dropped him nearby the fruit platform. "Jump on him."

Mario frowned. "That's a horrible idea."

"Do you want the fruit?" Toad said.

"Yes, but-"

"This is kinda the only way."

Mario frowned and said a quick apology before jumping directly onto Toad's large, spotted head. He bounced all the way up to the fruit.

"Yay! Now, I'll push it down."

Toad scurried out of the way as the large fruit came down.

"What is it?"

Peach lightly tapped the fruit. "It looks like a giant mango…?"

"Why is it so big?"

"The same reason that everything else was so big," Bowser said, stroking his chin. "Because the environment on this planet is big!"

They all glared at Bowser.

"Let's just eat the fruit before we starve."

They enjoyed the fruit, before it was gone. When it was gone, they were all satisfied. They stood, one by one. Mario led the way, deeper into the cave.

They halted, thirty minutes later. "Did you hear that..?" Mario said, crouching down.

"No." Bowser basically roared.

Mario turned around and his face instantly changed.

"What?"

Toad turned and instantly grabbed Peach and ran.

Bowser turned. A large, glow-in-the-dark, vivid-colored, bat-like creature was following them. It opened its large mouth and inhaled strongly. Bowser felt himself being lifted toward it.

Bowser shot fire. It (somehow) missed.

"Mario, HELP ME!"

Mario jumped and weighed Bowser down.

Bowser and Mario went up, but the creature stopped inhaling.

"Thanks. Where'd it go?"

Mario hopped up from the floor. "Was going into this cave a bad idea?"

"Yes."

Mario and Bowser ran to where Peach and Toad were. A dead end.

"What do we do?"

Mario turned to the watch. "Travel ready." It said.

He covered his eyes. "Guys, we might die, but I'm going to use this watch."

The creature appeared in front of them.

"USE THE WATCH!"

Mario felt around for the watch, before uncovering his eyes to press the side button. They all screamed as they disappeared into thin air.

Mario felt himself flying speedily. He opened his eyes to see a large, white and blue landscape. It was like a white space. Mario gasped. He then gasped again, as he could not breathe.

He opened his eyes again to Toad poking his face. "Hey, Mario? You alive?"

Mario leaned up. "Yeah, where are we? Heaven?"

"No. But we got split up again."

Oh, mio dio...

Mario looked around. A beach and a sea was all he could see. And then there was the jungle behind him.

"Toad, where are we?"

Toad shrugged.

They both screamed as a large figure fell from the sky. A large ape wearing a tie with the letters "DK" now stood in front of them.

Mario squinted. I know him!

"Toad, we know this guy! Remember Donkey Kong?"

Toad frowned. "The guy who Pauline dumped you for?"

"That's hurtful, and no. We went karting together?"

DK was poking Toad's bulbous head and watching it bounce back.

"Have you seen the princess?"

DK nodded ecstatically and scooped up Mario and Toad in one arm. With the other, DK swung through the jungle.

Mario screamed in delight. Toad screamed in pain as vines hit him in the face as they swung past.

Finally, they landed. The princess was asleep again. She was on a bed of leaves.

"Finally! We found her! AGAIN!"

The ape behind them felt abandoned for a second.

DK looked up, to a treehouse. It was labelled, "Kong" and was made of wood and straw.

DK picked up the princess and carried her up and into the house. He sat her in another leaf bed.

Mario and Toad, after several minutes of trying, climbed up.

"Nice house ya got there." Toad mumbled, as he tried to turn on the TV.

Mario looked out the window. He WAS thinking, but soon, he was watching as a portal opened and a small scouting ship landed on the beach.

"What is that?"

DK looked out too. He grumbled and went to leave. Mario grabbed his arm. "I'm going too."

DK shrugged and picked up Mario, Toad waved them off.

On the beach of DK island…

Billy shook the sand out of his goggles.

"I hate beaches. The sand, the seashells, that one dead jellyfish that always stings someone, I hate them!"

Amber was shaking herself off as well. "I love beaches! Me and my brother would always visit the beach for vacations. Of course, now we're bitter enemies."

"Ok, but we're here for the weird experimental bananas."

They both looked toward the forest. "Why couldn't Travis come with us? He would have known what to do…"

Amber sighed. "Rumor's gone around that he's got a date. Again."

"Doesn't he kill those?"

They didn't realize the large ape flying down from the sky toward them. Billy, shortly after seeing it, screamed.

Amber grabbed and moved Billy away, right as DK landed.

"Oh man, you nearly squashed us!"

Mario hopped off and scowled. "Hey, it's that little green piece of garbage again. Who's this, your girlfriend?"

Billy scowled too. "Oh, if it isn't the mustachioed red stain. 'S that your pet?"

"Oh, you're lucky he isn't…"

"Aw, if only I weren't a toad. I'd have whooped your butt redder than it already was!"

"What do you want, you little booger?"

"Oh, just here for some bananas. But the bananas are coming with some red stains and singed ape hair."

DK and Mario frowned. "You can't do that, we're not gonna let you!"

Amber rested her hand on the holstered Monado.

"So that's how it's gonna be, eh?"

Billy activated the chrome arms and a demonic smile crept up his face.

Mario and DK charged at the two, only for Amber to swing as hard as she could, knocking back Mario, but not Dk. DK was about to punch Billy, but Billy grabbed his hand and tried to punch him back. DK caught Billy's large, metal hand and then kicked the toad as far as he could. Billy didn't fly very far. Mario had jumped toward Amber. She was fast enough to dodge Mario and parry. Mario ducked in the nick of time, but the sword still grazed his arm. Mario grunted. Something was arising within him. Mario motioned for Dk to move. Dk kicked Billy off and rolled away, right as Mario put his hands together and screamed as he shot a huge fire blast from his hands, sending Billy and Amber far into the jungle. It also lit a few of the nearby trees on fire. DK scrambled to put out the flames, while Mario put out his own hands. Mario came around to help DK.

The two flew and landed right in front of DK's house. They stood and Amber laughed. "Hey, we found the bananas." She pointed toward a nearby cavern, labeled, "Kong's banana hoard."

They both went in. Billy gasped. "Well these are some pretty cool bananas. What do ya fancy they do, that your daddy wanted 'em for?"

Amber picked one up. "He mentioned something about size. Maybe they shrink whomever eats them?"

Billy shrugged and held one up to his face. "This is… odd. Do these seem… brighter, to you?"

Amber shrugged and scooped a bagful of them. "I don't know, but grab as much as you can. Maybe I'll let you experiment, once we get back."

"Yeah, if Dong, over there, doesn't kill us first…"

Billy took the time to find a marker in his vest and write a D over the K in "Kong's banana hoard"

Amber laughed at the joke but they both blanched when they saw how lost they were.

"Huh. We are lost."

"Yep… very… lost. So… where did the red stain send us from?"

They both sighed and started walking through the moist environment.

"Next time, remind me to draft Travis on this job."

They walked until they heard a sound behind them. They turned and Billy swore that he was on the verge of laughter. An anthropomorphic crocodile wearing a bandanna and a white tank top with cargo shorts stood behind them. "Oh no…" Amber muttered.

Billy blanched. "These guys DON'T travel in packs… right…?"

They looked up to see about five more in the trees. "So… we seem to have attracted some Kremlings."

Billy turned and four more blocked the forward path.

They found themselves surrounded.

Billy pulled a bomb from his vest and backed toward Amber. "On three, I'm going to teleport us back to the ship… ok?'

Though Billy couldn't see it, he was sure that she nodded.

Billy slowly counted down, as the Kremlings closed in. "3…"

They started going faster. "2…"

The Kremlings were so close, you could smell their horrid breath. "ONE!" Billy slammed the bomb to the ground, opening a portal back to the beach.

Billy landed headfirst into the sand, Amber fell on top of him, burying his poor self deeper into the sand.

Amber stood up and rejoiced, while Billy tried escaping from drowning in sand.

Finally, they reached the ship and sat the three large sacks of bananas down. "Cool. Now, let's leave."

Meanwhile…

Travis felt as if this trip were a waste of time. Especially with 3 coming along. If he were to commit a quick one, she would be in the way!

And then it hit him. What was that… psionic stuff I learned…

He looked around. It'll stun them for about… six? Maybe five minutes?

Travis cracked a smile and could've sworn that 3 was staring at him. Travis cast the move the others at his job called, "PK Flash."

At once, a large display of white lights and bulbs flew everywhere, captivating the large audience at hand. They stared until the display exploded, a flash of light going everywhere, the entire building blinded. They all stood still for a second, as if they were hypnotized. One moved. They stood, looked around, then burst into tears. Another one burst into tears. Someone else randomly started attacking someone who was crying, for no reason. Most of them fainted, about a third of them were attacking each other, and the rest were crying uncontrollably. Travis wasn't affected. He turned and 3 had fainted as well. Instantly, Travis smiled. No one would suspect it through the chaos…

Whilst the crowd of squid sobbed and beat each other up, Travis glided over to Marley's seat. Marley was in tears. Travis looked at Marley. Marley hadn't seen him yet. Travis grabbed Marley and dragged him to one of the back rooms. Marley flew into the room as Travis tossed him over.

Marley looked up to Travis, who had closed and locked the door. Marley smiled. "Was it you?"

"Was it me who what?"

"You did that. You-"

Travis switched faces almost immediately. He went from calm and collected, to eyes widened and knife out.

"Of course it was me! Are you dumb, son? Just because you're with the government you think that you're exempt from me? Well, newsflash, you aren't!"

Marley pulled out some sort of tracker. "Even if you kill me, they will find you."

"And… lemme get this straight… you think I care? I'll kill them too. Who even is 'them'?"

"The-"

"That was a rhetorical question, Marley, I thought you were smarter than that."

Marley tried blinking out the forced tears to see Travis properly. "Who are you, anyway?"

"You wouldn't recognize the person you tried to put in jail?"

Travis laughed when Marley's eyes grew wide. "I know what you're thinking. 'How would he know that?' things come around, buddy. If you thought you were off the hook, pun intended, you literally are not."

Marley tried pressing a button on the tracker, but Travis took it. "What even is this? What dumpster did you dive in to get this, eh?" Travis laughed at his own joke. Marley remained drying his face.

Finally Travis stopped playing around. "Ok, it was fun playing with you, but I didn't come in here for friendly banter… Basically, hold still while I-"

Marley tried to take back the tracker by standing up and trying to wrench it from Travis's hands. Travis, knowing he was trying to do such actions, jabbed the switchblade into Marley's side one good time, knocking him over. Marley now clutched his side as Travis bent down.

"Oh, that was a mistake."

Luigi nearly jumped out of his skin when he came back and saw Simon in the lounge. "Hey, what are you doing here-"

Simon darted over to Luigi and grabbed him by the shoulders, smiling creepily. "Finally, you're back! Thank heavens, I was going insane! So, remember Janet?"

Luigi nodded slowly.

"Good, because he's gone insane."

Luigi had to do a double take. "He's what?"

Oh hey it's me this is getting old- So, Marley is in trouble. Who even is Marley?

This marks the supposed halfway point of the story. It's been fun since. Sadly, all good things come to an end.

What did Billy plan to do with the bananas, anyway? What's it gonna become?

Does anyone remember Janet? Great, because, as Simon says, "Good, because he's insane."