"No Running This Time" (Rose)

Merlin did just as I asked, and presented Roland, the evidence, and I delivered my testimony to the King. Roland was sentenced to death. I cannot say he did not deserve what was fated him. His penalty was fitting. I visited him the night before his execution. I had no fear of him. There would be no running this time- not from him, nor from me.

I told him goodbye ... I'm not quite sure why I did it. I suppose I needed closure of some sort. He was so drained, I actually pitied him. Gaius had given him a potion to strip him of his magic temporarily. Without it, he was nothing but a shell of a man.

I parted with no feelings in particular ... That numb thing was happening again. I wanted to be angry with him. I wanted to feel that I had avenged my father, my people, and the Roland I once knew who was lost during his inward battle of good and evil when his inner darkness swallowed it up.

I've been sitting in Merlin and I's room ever since this they left this morning. I pretended that I was asleep and I heard them discuss letting me alone, how it was hard enough on me. Maybe it was weak of me, but I couldn't go and watch him die. I didn't want to see another spectacle of death ending with the burning of someone that I had once loved.

It seems that ten years have passed before Merlin steps slowly through the door. I stand up and face him. All he can do is let his droop his head. At this, I start to feel something as a tear slips out of my eye.

I swipe at it furiously. "Why can't I hate him!?" Merlin looks at me with bewilderment written all over his expression. "Why!" I shout.

"I- I think there's a part of us that will never stop caring for those we have loved, even if it does hurt," he says tenderly.

"What if I don't want to care?" my voice drops to a near whisper.

"Why would you want that?" he steps closer to me.

"It would be easier ..."

"Then you wouldn't be you; and that would be a travesty. One of the things I admire most about you is your ability to love and understand, no matter what the circumstances," he offers me a small smile.

I walk up to him and wrap my arms around his torso, and cry as he holds me tight. "I'm scared, Merlin. I'm so scared ... I loved a monster, and I am of the same kind as he. What if that happens to me?"

He shushes me, "It's okay to be scared, but I know, as sure as I am standing here, that you are not a thing like him, and you never will be. You are a Woodward, but you are also Rose, remember what you told me? You said, 'You have a choice in who you become.' And you were absolutely right- what you are is only a part of who you are. The rest is our choice. Just because I have magic, that doesn't mean I'm like every sorcerer who has used their gifts for evil. I know you. You will use your gifts and heart for good. You wouldn't needlessly accuse someone or turn on them if they had done nothing wrong. You are merciful. You could have killed Roland."

"I did kill him," I sob.

"No! You brought him to justice. You did the right thing," he assures me, stroking my hair ever so lightly, "Imagine if you had let him go. Most likely, he would have kept to his evil, murderous ways and practice of the dark arts. You prevented that. You probably spared many lives this way. And, in the end, you saved him from himself. You did nothing wrong."

"Merlin?" my small voice travels through the air as I push away from him softly to look up at his glimmering blue gems for eyes.

"Yes?" he returns my gaze with tenderness in the form of a tiny grin.

"Thank you ... I don't know what I would do without you." He responds by pulling me to his chest. I am secure in simply listening to the beat of his golden heart.

"A New Day" (Merlin)

Life goes on as it always does. The days don't fly, and they don't drag. Dare I say, normality has set in now? Yes. Yes, I do dare. Every day I pop off to work and come home in time for a decent meal. Rose has been assisting Gaius with meals and things. He's even taken to teaching her medicine. Considering that her mother was a healer, I don't imagine that is it difficult for her to pick up. So, she stays home and takes care of the chambers; although, Arthur told her that she keeps me in line and does my job better than I do when she does visit. Therefore, if she ever wants to come along, she is permitted. In other news, we have finally gotten her a bed, which is now at a set place in our shared quarters. All is really beginning to settle down, and I must say, it feels very nice.

This morning felt particularly normal- things started as they have been. The Camelot patrol set off to ensure a delivery was made to the city. I buzzed about my chores, doing this and that for everyone's favorite prat. Come nightfall, rain is pouring over the streets, but I don't mind. It helps me to rest, and tomorrow will be a new day.

(( Ah, my readers. Thus ends the first leg of Merlin and Rose's journey. But don't worry there is plenty to come. And coming up next is Rose's first venture into the canon plot in "The Witch's Quickening".))