"Either Way" (Rose)
"Don't worry, Gaius," I rest my hand on the old man's shoulder, "I'll speak with him." I trot up the steps and sneak through the door swiftly.
"They should have told me," Merlin exhales through tears, drawing in another thick breath.
"I understand what you mean, Merlin, and I'm here to talk it over with you, whether you like it or not. Either way," I sit myself next to him on his bed. "You must also see their reasoning. Your mother was simply trying to do what she thought was best for you. She loves you, Merlin. She didn't do this to hurt you, and neither did Gaius. You mean everything to them. Don't persecute them for doing the same exact thing you are doing to yourself and many of those you care for."
"What do you mean?" he stares at me with forehead creased.
"You keep your magic a secret for your own safety, but you also conceal it from others so that they need not share the burden. How is that any different?" I challenge him gently.
He sniffs and wipes at his cheeks, "I suppose you're right ... But then again, what else is new?"
I give him a light shove, "You are unbelievable." He grants me an impish smile in return. "Please, don't punish Gaius. He was only trying to do right by you, and you going away kills him as is. Let him know you're not holding this against him before we leave, I implore you."
"I will," he agrees.
"Merlin," I grab hold of his arm, "You're going to meet your father."
His lips split, showing his white teeth with excitement, "And he's a Dragonlord. How amazing is that?"
"Unbelievably!"
"Like father, like son," he laughs. His face then becomes full of whimsy and wonder. I smile warmly, knowing that he must be thinking of what it will be like to finally learn of the man he never knew.
"Unsettled" (Merlin)
I still have yet to speak to Gaius, but I'm not entirely looking forward to it. He means so much to me, but I am still hurt. For this reason, even though I do want him to know this doesn't change what we've been through together and that I'll always love him, I cannot locate how to do that within my heart.
"Just talk to him," Rose urges, reading my thoughts- but not literally … this time- as she sees him approaching.
I don't so much as look at him directly. "Have you got everything you need?" he inquires.
I nod quickly, guilt rising inside. I look up at him, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..." I quiet.
He nods multiple times, "I know that," and I nod back.
"Come on, Merlin!" Arthur takes charge, mounting his chocolate brown horse.
"You're ready?" I quiz.
"No thanks to you," he retorts.
I look back at him to see him wincing before hopping into the saddle. "Are you okay?"
"It's just a scratch," he brushes it off.
Rose has to ride along with me. We figured this would be best, especially taking in mind the bargain she made with Arthur. She says a sweet farewell to our caretaker, kissing his aged cheek. Once she is positioned securely behind me on the steed, Arthur sets off with a brisk canter, and Gaius stops us before we go, "Merlin, whatever happens, you must not let Arthur know who this man is. Uther would view the son of a Dragonlord with a deepest suspicion." I nod once more, and he claps the horse on the shoulder blade before we set off after the Prince.
We charge through the forest, and the more I dwell on the thought of setting eyes on my father for the very first time, I grow more and more unsettled. What do I say to the man who means so much to me, and yet, we have never met? 'Just be you, Merlin,' Rose picks up on my unease again. 'That is enough to make him proud.'
We ride hard and fast until we reach the cleft of a valley. "This is it," Arthur proclaims. "One more step and we're in Cenred's kingdom."
"What are we waiting for?" Rose prods him, good-naturedly.
"This Balinor better be worth it," he utters before pressing on.