"Goodbye, Gwaine" (Rose)
"I swear on all that is good, I have never, EVER wanted to slap anyone so hard before, or at all, for that matter," I stumble over my own ideals.
"That is probably for the best, little one," Gwaine says endearingly as he begins to compile his belongings. "Don't waste your energy on negativity for my sake."
"Since when are you the levelheaded one between us?" I cross my arms with a laugh.
"Perhaps, I've just spent time around a wonderful person who is a touch more influential than I am used to," he smiles over his shoulder at me.
"You do not give yourself enough credit, Gwaine," I sit atop my bed with a sigh. "Arthur spoke true of your heart."
"Eh, what does he know?" he teases. "I'm grateful for his efforts, however."
"As am I," I give a weak smile as we step into the front room.
"I'm sorry," Merlin says regretfully as Gwaine tightens his belt.
"Don't be," he replies, shoving the last of his possessions into his knapsack. "I never stay in one place for very long. People get sick of me too quickly."
"I didn't," Merlin refutes.
"After all the trouble I caused?" Gwaine pushes.
Merlin shakes his head once with a little huff of air. "You livened the place up."
To which Gwaine laughs and responds, suddenly solemn, "Make sure you look after Arthur. He's in danger."
"I thought you hated nobles," Merlin shrewdly remarks.
"Yeah. Well, maybe that one's worth dying for, eh?" He clasps his hand onto Merlin's shoulder for a quick second, and I cannot find it in me to say a word.
I am not ready to say goodbye.
Before he walks out the door, Gwaine pauses for the tiniest fraction of a second, looks back at us, his eyes bore into mine, and he simply nods.
With that, he is gone.
Knowing that I will regret letting the moment pass me by, I scramble after him.
"Gwaine, wait," I call out as I hear his footsteps descending the stairs. At the sound of my voice, they cease, shuffle a bit, and he pops his head around the bend.
"Yes, milady?" he gives a sober half-smile.
"I just-" I break off, feeling girlish and silly. "I wanted you to know that I agree with Merlin."
"Shock," he laughs lightly through his nose.
"You know what I mean," I take a few steps down, just to give him a gentle whack on the arm. "I'm really going to miss you … But, I absolutely refuse to say 'Goodbye'."
"No need," a genuine grin crosses his face. "We will see each other again … Especially because, I am going to miss you, too. And, well, we can't have that."
"It would be unacceptable," I play along with a small laugh.
"C'mere," he opens up an arm, which I gladly step under.
As I feel his strength and warmth envelope me, I can't help but wonder to myself, 'Is this what it feels like to have a brother?'
"Just promise me you'll keep safe," I step back up a bit, surveying him carefully. "As safe as you can manage anyhow."
With one final smirk, he agrees. "I promise to do just that." He gives me a wink, and continues his descent, taking a small piece of my heart with him. Perhaps I will never know what it was that drew me to him in a familial fashion, but I don't think all things in life need questioning, either.
"Separation's Desperation" (Merlin)
Even though I have found myself constantly scolding myself for letting any twinge of wonder or jealousy enter my brain when Gwaine and Rose are together and out of sight (or even in sight for that matter), watching her follow him out through the door sends a feeling through me that I can't bring myself to place.
Shoving it aside for the time being, I am now plagued with dread as to how we solve this indisputable horror of a situation. Gaius sits in heavy silence, driving me even madder with worry, and I have to stay on my feet and move around. Sitting would simply aid in my feeling separation's desperation from the solution … and from Rose.
As various images of her with Gwaine and, on the other hand, Arthur's impending, bloody doom flash through my mind, I'm about ready to fall over with a small shift in the wind as she re-enters the chambers.
She also does not say a thing.
"I don't know what we do," I say honestly as I continue pacing about the room.
"I could try and persuade Arthur to withdraw from the contest," Gaius offers.
"That may work," Rose suggests feebly.
"He won't. I know Arthur," I cease my movement and lean up against a table. "I'll have to somehow use my powers to defend him."
"From the crowd?" Rose's tone peaks out of concern.
"With the King and half of Camelot watching?" Gaius builds on her thoughts.
"I don't have choice," I tell them with sincere belief.
"There has to be another way," Rose defies.
"But there isn't," I push back gently. "And I think we all know this to be true."
"I'm not so sure," her voice drops into a cool, lower tone that I would normally question, but I haven't the time.
"So then, it's settled," I conclude with a huff of exasperation. "I am going to lay my magical neck on the line for Arthur once more, but this time, in plain sight for his father and all of Camelot to see … Great."
How airing that grievance imparted some relief within me, I may never know.