Chapter 16.
Gordon should have been a girl.
His ultrasound scan had said as much.
Scott could still clearly remember the day Lucy had shown him, Virgil, and John the grainy black and white image, accompanied by excited exclamations that they were finally going to have a sister.
The scan had revealed no obvious male anatomy, leading the existing members of the Tracy clan to assume that their seventh member was indeed a girl. John in particular had been delighted. He'd never seen eye to eye with his two tearaway brothers, and the thought of having a little sister to dote on had filled him with elation. The possibility of her being a redhead like him had been the icing on the cake.
Flashback…
The awkward smiles on Jeff and Lucy's faces went utterly unnoticed to Scott, Virgil, and John's child brains when they walked through the door with child número quatro. He/she/it was swaddled in a yellow blanket with his/her/it's gender well hidden. Given the impossibility of being able to tell a newborns gender from its face alone, the three brothers treated the new arrival like the sister they thought he/she/it was.
Said new arrival cooed in delight when three faces materialised over the rim of the bassinet.
"What's she called?" Scott asked excitedly, offering his finger to his new 'sister', who seized it eagerly and stuffed it in her mouth.
"We…er…haven't decided yet," Jeff replied with a cough, acutely aware that he'd been the very one who'd gotten the boys so excited about finally having a girl in the family.
"Can we name her?" John asked hopefully, looking at Lucy with big doe-like eyes, "I really like the name Jessica."
"I like Victoria," Virgil added, giggling when his 'sister' began to fruitlessly gum on Scott's finger.
"How about Soraya?" Scott offered, reaching down to gently poke his baby 'sister' on the nose.
Jeff cleared his throat awkwardly, "All great suggestions, boys. We'll…er…get back to you once we've decided."
The conversation was left at that. In an effort to give their 'sister' some form of identity aside from 'the baby' in the days that followed, Scott, Virgil, and John agreed, after much deliberation, that they all liked the name Georgia. Jeff and Lucy seemed to be taking their sweet time over the whole process, and their tardiness prompted Scott to start calling the baby by her new name whenever he was safely out of earshot.
Naturally, it was only a matter of time before Virgil and John began to mimic their eldest brother.
'Georgia' had many gifts bestowed upon her by her doting brothers, including countless pink dresses, pink onesies, pink blankets, and a whole heap of pink fluffy toys. Between the efforts of all three boys, Jeff and Lucy rather ironically found their workload to be surprisingly light.
Ever the strategist, Scott quickly devised a schedule for the night shifts, complete with separate columns for rocking, feeding, and burping. Each brother was then assigned his own individual field; John specialised in feeding, since he was the only one who seemed able to heat the milk up to just the right temperature. As the most patient brother, Virgil was often called in for burping after John had finished feeding, while Scott was the king of rocking.
It was agreed unanimously that the task of changing would be left to the lazy adults.
Adorned in pink, pink, and even more pink, baby 'Georgia' was the very picture of pink cuteness. A couple of months after arriving home, Scott discovered several yellow tufts poking out of his 'sister's' head, excitedly announcing that not only had the family acquired its first girl, but also its first blond.
Sadly, all good things had to come to an end.
It had been a sleepy Saturday, and Virgil had enthusiastically volunteered for bath duty after Lucy had come down with a headache. Jeff had been away at work and Scott and John had been busy playing with a butterfly they'd managed to trap in a jar. Their mother had complained that 'the baby' needed a bath, however had showed no signs of getting up off the couch to do just that.
Spying an opportunity to broaden his skillset with 'Georgia' and appease his mom at the same time, Virgil had leapt at the opportunity to take care of 'the baby' for the rest of the day. Careful to not draw the attention of his brothers, he'd run a shallow bath with copious amounts of bubble liquid. He'd then fished a clean towel out of the laundry cupboard and even popped a rubber dolphin in the water for amusement's sake.
In the years to come, he would remember each detail with alarming clarity.
'Georgia' had squealed in excitement when Virgil had showed her the bubbly bath that he'd prepared. Careful to not drop his beloved 'sister', the second brother had set about removing her pink onesie with one hand, the other absently testing the temperature of the water.
It wasn't until after he'd lowered 'Georgia' into the water that his world shattered.
The scream that had left Virgil's lungs had travelled out of the bathroom, along the hallway, up and down the stairs, around the pool, and down to the beach before reaching the ears of his brothers.
Upon reaching the bathroom, their own screams had been similarly spectacular.
Thus, 'Georgia' had been lost and 'Gordon' found.
-x-
If Gordon's brief spell as a girl had taught him anything, it was that females deserved to be respected.
Which was why he was so grateful that Kayo had been called back to Argentina. It gave him a whole extra day (or two) to perfect his romantic action plan.
An advantage none of his brothers had been blessed with.
Plus, it also gave him the opportunity to partake in the impromptu eating competition they had going on. Under normal circumstances, there was no way the aquanaut would have risked his gut by indulging in one too many tacos mere hours before taking a girl as lovely as Kayo out on a date. It looked as if the tacos contained cheese, and he had no desire to test Scott's theory that he was lactose intolerant in the cramped confines of Thunderbird Four with only Kayo for company.
As it stood, he was free to binge his way to victory.
Gordon smirked as he eyeballed his brothers. They didn't stand a chance. Anyone dumb enough to try and out-eat him would be in for a very rude surprise (and possibly a winner's belch to the face).
One by one, each brother reached into the centre of the table and selected their first taco. Gordon grabbed the one nearest to him and dumped it messily onto his plate, his hands poised to start savaging the poor thing as soon as the timer started.
Unfortunately, John and Alan decided to take their sweet time deciding which tacos to select. John seemed to be looking for the smallest one (an obvious battle strategy), while Alan looked more concerned with locating the mildest one.
When all five of them were finally armed and dangerous, Scott poised his finger over the start button on his phone's stopwatch.
"Ready…"
Virgil lowered his face so that his mouth was mere inches from his taco. Scott had walked all over his pride the previous evening, and he was determined to get even with his older brother if it killed him.
"Set…"
Alan gingerly lifted one side of his taco, cringing when he spied the sheer quantity of chilli inside. The bathroom was going to become his new home.
"Go!"
No sooner had Scott started the timer than five mouths were frantically stuffed to capacity, tortilla crumbs flying everywhere as each brother chewed and swallowed for all he was worth.
Such was the pride of a man.
-x-
Sally sighed as she sorted through the massive pile of dirty clothes in the laundry room. In front of her lay Gordon's shirts, Alan's pyjamas, Gordon's towels, Virgil's jeans, Gordon's trunks, Kayo's gym stuff, and Gordon's socks.
For reasons that defied both logic and science, only Scott seemed aware of the need to launder his clothing on a semi-regular basis.
The Tracy matriarch was just contemplating whether she'd need tongs to pick up a particularly grimy looking t-shirt of Alan's, when the room's comm system suddenly activated. Grateful for an excuse, Sally abandoned the offending article of clothing and switched on the remote holoprojector, smiling when Lady Penelope's face materialised.
"Hello, dear!" she greeted warmly, pausing slightly when she noticed the distressed look on the younger woman's face, "Is everything alright? You look a bit shaken up."
Penelope forced a smile, "Mrs Tracy! Forgive me, I was trying to reach Kayo. Is she in her room?"
Sally shook her head, "I'm afraid she's away in Argentina at the moment. Is there anything I can do for you?"
Penelope tilted her head and averted her gaze, "Well, I was actually trying to report in with Virgil's score from last night, however I think I might have interrupted the boy's…um…breakfast?"
A rueful smile was offered, "They're just indulging in a bit of silly competitiveness. Boys will be boys, right?"
The traumatised expression refused to leave Penelope's face.
"Tell you what, why don't you tell me his score, and then I'll pass it on to him once they're finished?" Sally suggested, glancing uncertainly at the pile of laundry that was refusing to go away, "Let me just a grab some paper and something to write with."
"F.A.B," Penelope responded, patting Sherbert's head as Sally located the desired tools.
"Okay, fire away!"
Penelope shook her head to clear it of the taco-savaging scene she'd been subjected to mere minutes ago, "Okay, his dress sense was absolutely top notch. He colour coordinated well, and paid a good amount of attention to the smaller details men so often overlook, like hair and good quality cologne. He's the first of the group to score five for that category. The activity and location were 'out of this world', at least according to Kayo's notes. You really would struggle to devise a more romantic date than a gondola ride around Venice. I think I might have missed a trick by allowing Kayo to be the one who went undercover in this little exercise. Again, it's another five. It probably goes without saying that his budget for the night was more than generous, however he did tip the gondolier in front of Kayo, which some people might consider crude. Call me harsh, but I insisted that we downgrade him to a three for that one. Subtle tipping is fine, but doing it out in the open isn't particularly classy. His manners were a bit of a stumbling point. Before they departed Tracy Island and during the initial phases of the date, he was wonderful. Confident, yet courteous. Playful, yet polished. Unfortunately, things went south quite rapidly after he fell in the canal. Kayo's notes say that he ended the date at that point without consulting her. While we understand that he was in no state to remain in a public place, Kayo herself was also cold and wet from hauling him out of the water, however he failed to show any concern for her and seemed completely preoccupied with his own wellbeing. I insisted that we give him a two for that. Finally, was he second date material? Interestingly, despite his rather rapid descent from hero to zero, Kayo was suitably impressed and reckoned that he was. His tipping etiquette requires some work in my opinion, and Kayo would have appreciated him offering her his jacket on the walk back to Thunderbird Two, however she was feeling fair and gave him another four. That brings his final score to nineteen out of twenty five. A jolly good effort, although I don't think he and Scott will be talking for the foreseeable future."
Sally paused in her frantic scribbling to smile, "I assume that means Scott is currently winning?"
"Indeed," Penelope replied, her blue eyes twinkling, "Poor Gordon has a steep hill to climb, but I'm sure he'll tackle it with his usual gusto."
"We'll see about that," Sally replied, her tone laced with humour, "Thank you for the report, dear. I'd offer to stay and chat, but I've got two tonnes of laundry I need to sort through for the boys. I'd make them do it themselves, but they have to be ready to deploy at a moment's notice. Be sure to give my best to Parker."
Penelope gave a polite nod, "I will. Oh, and Mrs Tracy? I'd like to put a little wager down myself on the outcome of that rather ferocious eating contest I almost disrupted."
"I didn't think ladies did that kind of thing," Sally queried, silently impressed at the younger woman's willingness to defy the restrictions of her class.
An elegant sniff climbed out of Penelope's nose, "On the contrary, Parker and I always place bets on the runners at Ascot and Cheltenham. It's our little tradition, and I'm seldom wrong in my choosing."
"Very well," Sally capitulated, "The going rate is fifty bucks my end for Virgil, and Brains also has fifty on Gordon."
Penelope's poker face barely twitched, "Put fifty pounds down on Alan for me, if you please. I don't usually sympathise with underdogs, but the poor boy looked way out of his depth from the short glimpse I got."
"Better get your cheque book ready!" Sally snickered, waving before preparing to sign off.
"Oh, my apologies Parker," Penelope exclaimed, twisting her head to stare at something offscreen, "I almost forgot. Mrs Tracy, could you also make a note for two extra bets? Parker's fifty is on Scott, and Sherbert's is on John."
Sally raised an eyebrow at the suggestion that Sherbert had his own money, "Very well, dear. I hope you won't be too sore about losing one hundred and fifty of your family's hard-earned pounds."
Penelope smiled serenely.
"Au contraire, Mrs Tracy. Sherbert here is an absolute authority on all things food-related."