Chapter 79: Why We're Called Your Crew

…

"All right, Link, it's time to get your ass out of bed."

"Go away," Link said from under the blankets.

"Welp, we tried." Pap. "Ow!"

Link heaved a sigh. "All of you. Out."

"No face, no orders, Captain. Page five."

"You read the book?"

"I skimmed it." There was a pause before Brandon admitted, "Okay, Gold skimmed it."

"I 'ad tae read it tae 'im."

"This isn't a comedy club, you guys," Link groaned at them. "Get out."

There was a pause, but Link could tell no one had left. "Ah," he heard Leynne say. "Page five. 'A superioh may not give vehbal ohdehs without face-to-face communication. Ohdehs may be given through written communication provided that the ohdeh is signed by the captain and the subohdinate is proven capable of passible literacy."

Link twisted to locate the pen and parchment they had tried shoving under his covers earlier. He did not need to see in order to scribble something onto the parchment and sign his name. Then he threw the parchment from under covers and huddled himself together again.

"'—Scram'," Gold read.

"I am afraid I cannot be cehtain of that," Leynne said. "I have neveh provided proof of my literacy."

"You guys are pushing it," Link warned them.

"Can we just do it already?" Line asked.

"Unfohtunately, theh is a process to respect," Leynne said. "Afteh all, any physical action taken against the captain can be construed as mutiny."

"So, you need another superior?"

Link heaved a sigh. "Princess, with all due respect, would you please go away?"

"I have no intention of leaving," Zelda replied. "However, I appreciate your respect, Skipper." Link groaned at hearing the last word while someone nearby snorted.

"Captain, you've been secluded in youh cabin foh most of the day," Leynne said. "This is a ratheh concehning development, especially considering that a numbeh of us still feel the effects of the Dreamweaveh."

"I'm fine," Link told him.

"Ah, now I see why you had Layna hunt down the princess," Dholit spoke up. "Captain, is it not true that, having swohn fielty to the royal family, you ah bound by ohdahs from the royal family?"

"No face, no orders," Link replied.

"And, by the ensuing chain of command, we ah similahly bound," Leynne pointed out.

"No, you're not!" Link argued.

"Wait, are we?" Line asked.

"You guys aren't gonna just bully me outta here!" Link hollered at them. "I'll come out when I'm ready!"

"I would insist that you come out now, Captain," Leynne said.

"You can't order me out!" Link replied.

"This is a wahning, not an ohdeh," Leynne said while someone shuffled around. "I strongly insist that you comply."

"I'm gonna kick the first person who touches my bed!"

Link could only hear shuffling for a moment. Then Zelda said, "Very well, Skipper. Lieutenant Leynne, you may conduct yourselves as you see fit."

"Yes, Youh Highness," Leynne answered. "Gentlemen?"

Link heard something tap against the deck and balled his fists in anticipation of the first person trying to grab his covers off.

SPAASH! "WHAH-HAH!" Link shrieked in surprise when he realized that the sudden pressure falling onto his blankets was what must have been a barrelful of water. He sprang in attempt to escape being drenched and—WHUMPF!—slammed his head into a nearby bulkhead. In spite of seeing stars for a moment, he struggled and scrambled to get the wet covers off, striking one foot against the same bulkhead a couple of times. Once he was in the light, he shoved himself into the corner and screamed, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!"

Then he realized exactly who had trooped into the room. Directly at his bedside were Leynne, Zelda, Irleen, Gold, Line, and Dholit. In a gap between the crew, Link saw Brandon and Randy retreating with an empty barrel. Once ranks closed again, Link saw Nester, Hunter, Lwamm, Twali, Layna, Biluf, Dubbl, Cale, Lilly, Stan, Beech, Lawrence, Harley, Botu, Ray, Gillam, and Dubbl were also in the room, many of them collected around his desk or standing at the foot of the bed.

"Good aftehnoon, My Captain," Dholit said with a large smile.

Link blew water out of his face and looked around at his crew for a moment. "I'm surprised you didn't haul Sello up here," he commented in a wry tone.

"Ohp," Lawrence uttered as he remembered something. He ducked behind Gold and Harley. Then he hauled Sello to his feet. "We did!"

Sello, his wobbling arrested by Lawrence keeping a tight grip on his clothes, grinned and waved a hand in greeting. "Hi, Mom!" he hollered.

Link lowered his gaze to the bed and covered his face with one hand. He hoped he appeared exhausted or annoyed while trying not to laugh at Sello's stupidity. "Great Goddesses, you guys…" he groaned. "What do you want…?"

Irleen had retrieved a few sheets of wet parchment from the bed and showed them to Leynne. "Well, I have to admit that my original puhpose was to check on these," Leynne said. "I'd assumed you had at least looked at them. Howeveh, hearing you groan incoherently did not quite hold promise. It is well afteh noon, and you ah proving to be quite neglectful of youh usual routine."

"Maybe I just wanted to be a slacker for a day," Link suggested.

"The last time you attempted that," Dholit spoke up, "you finished papahwork at the main office, took a shipment of wine foh youh mothah and stoahed it, helped youh grandfatheh balance the tavehn's finances, and cleaned the rooms at the tavehn."

Leynne's gaze shifted between Link and Dholit for a moment, confused by the information. "How did you discoveh this?" Leynne asked Dholit. "As I recall, you weh offering translation to the office wohkehs that day."

"Layna told me," Dholit said with a grin.

Link heaved a sigh. "Layna…"

"'Inu suxdya'ak," Layna spoke up. A number of heads turned to her, and she hunched her shoulders in embarrassment. "Taf tigi fuxwthya'ak."

Dholit gave Link a quick look of confusion. "Biluf, zhayzokan Layna kambi xwal," she then said.

Biluf groaned in irritation before saying, "Layna sifunidh…"

"Idha 'inu laxmya'ak dhol?" Layna asked as they left the cabin.

"Did… we miss something?" Hunter asked.

"I think I missed something," Dholit told him as she stepped around him to follow. "By all means, continue without me." Unspoken questions followed Dholit out the door, this strange (though hardly unprecedented) change in focus confusing some members of the crew.

Leynne was the first to turn back to Link. "Well, Captain?" he asked. "I at least ask foh an explanation."

Link had to admit that he was already sick of having his crew gathered around him. He sighed and took a moment to rake his hair back out of his face. "Can… can we at least clear the room?" he asked.

"Link?" Zelda asked.

"Please?" Link added.

Leynne took in a breath and addressed Zelda. "Youh Highness, I believe we may come to an undehstanding, if you will excuse us foh a few moments."

"Of course, Mister Leynne," Zelda said, giving him a smile.

Leynne then gestured over Zelda's head so as not to strike her. "The rest of you," he said in a harder tone, "out."

Line blew a raspberry as the rest of the crew lined up to leave. "Maaaan," he groaned. "I knew this was a waste of time."

"You were the first one who wanted to come knock the sense into him," Brandon pointed out.

"Yeah, but I always wanna do that," Line told him before leaving.

Link waited until Lawrence, the last one out due to having to drag Sello, closed the door (which was followed by a thump against the deck outside because he had had to release Sello) before asking Leynne, "Am I that big of a pain in the ass?"

"I don't believe so," Leynne replied as he glanced at the door. "Line seems to have simply made it his goal in life to punch you." Link nodded as if he understood and looked down at the bed. Leynne turned to him and took in the sight of the depressed young man. "So. I take this tuhn of attitude to be a sign that you've been thinking too hahd about something lately."

"I guess…" Link answered.

"Given you weh not like this eahlieh this mohning, I can only assume you've been brooding oveh something Janni told you."

Link heaved a sigh. "She… hates me."

"Not… pahticulahly unusual," Leynne admitted. "You did kill heh fatheh."

"I wish it was that."

Leynne raised an eyebrow and took a moment to respond. "I suppose it was a somewhat hasty conclusion."

Link nodded. "She… I-I guess she has a crush on me. She… told me that she loved me."

Leynne's other eyebrow rose, although his face remained neutral. "So… I imagine the difficulty is in… you not reciprocating?" he asked.

"That's… that's part of it. I, um… I told her she was part of my crew. But, the way she makes it sound, it's like it was the worst thing I could have told her."

"Well…" Leynne paused to consider his words. Link looked up just as he was putting on a helpless shrug. "Foh this pahticulah occasion, I can see how calling heh a paht of youh crew comes off as… impehsonal. If she has such affections foh you, Link, she might intehpret it as you pushing heh away."

"She said she wasn't the only one I did that to. Dholit, Layna, Zelda… I mean, do they feel the same way? Do they hate me for just calling them my crew?"

"Oh, deah…" Leynne grunted as he pinched his nose. "Link…" Link picked his head up in anticipation of Leynne reassuring him, but Leynne just sighed and let his arm fall. "Well, I suppose Janni isn't completely wrong…" Link's glance fell. "Link, whetheh Janni is right about the otheh women's feelings is something only they can answeh. Pehhaps theih affections foh you ah a lot strongeh than just being paht of youh crew. But I would hesitate to take Janni's wohd foh it. You ah speaking of someone who is ratheh upset with you."

"Do I seem… immature to you?"

"As an airship commandeh, I would judge you well ahead of youh time. But if you'h refehring to pehsonal maturity, I'm afraid that's a complicated question." Link groaned in response. "Link, the crew can appreciate a young captain when the next one in comparison is Line. Howeveh, I would have to say that, between you two, Line does seem to have a focus on the opposite gendeh." He shrugged and added, "In his ratheh… criminal soht of way."

Link gave him an irritated look. "He steals. Their clothes."

"It could be wohse. My point is that no one has noticed such tendencies out of you. It isn't necessary that you steal from them oh touch them inappropriately." Link groaned again. "Um… well, admittedly, that might actually be a step closeh to nohmal. You have the capacity foh decency, but it seems that you just don't have much desih foh the companionship. It comes across as a bit odd."

Link groaned again and said, "Yeah, that's about what Janni said. Just… nicer."

Leynne nodded. "Well, as much as it may infuriate heh, it would seem that, whetheh you ah emotionally matuh oh not, she still requihs you to be attracted to heh. I am not familiah with how Sorians choose lovehs, but Hylians have always seemed to requih mutual affection foh one anotheh."

"Like you and Dubbl?" Link asked.

Leynne let his head hang for a moment. "Well… it cehtainly took its time developing, but we reached that point afteh about fifty black eyes. And that's what it takes: development. She cannot so easily expect you to fall in love with heh, most especially if you ah as immatuh as she believes."

Link covered his eyes. "I don't believe this…"

"Pehhaps you ah not in such a rush to find love," Leynne said, "but theh do seem to be women trying. And I imagine you might eventually want to reciprocate. Foh now, though… I might say that you ah on notice."

"Is this… something a sixteen-year-old has to normally deal with?" Link asked.

"Actually, you probably should have been subject to this behavioh two yeahs ago," Leynne admitted. "Although, I can see how being raised on an aihship strictly crewed by men might make interacting with women somewhat awkwahd."

"Wha-what am I supposed to do?" Link asked, his tone rising.

Leynne shrugged. "I would not call myself an expeht, but I suspect you have at least two options. You can eitheh let events run as you like until you actually develop interest in one of these women, oh you can let youhself become prurient like Line until one of them reciprocates."

"I think I'll do the first one…" Link groaned.

"As long as you can at least acknowledge this is happening, you might eventually come to a resolution." He glanced around at the bed. "I have to admit, I fail to see what you expected to accomplish by hiding in youh bed. It isn't as if you could remain theh foheveh."

"I don't know. I was just feeling miserable, so I didn't really wanna do anything else today." Link looked down at his hands before pinching his trousers to check if they were dry. "Uh… do we still have a free bed in the private billets?"

"Only the billet we have been using foh passengehs. Although the mattress is only about a thihd of the size of this one."

"It's gonna have to do," Link said as he stood up. He heard his clothes squish as he moved and glanced down at himself. "You guys…"

"Ah, yes," Leynne said. "I imagine this is when divine retribution strikes youh mutinous crew."

"Yeah," Link said as he folded his arms together. "Tell them that no one leaves the ship until my mattress is dry and back in place."

"Undehstood, sih," Leynne said as he crossed the room toward the door. "But I must say that it was wohth it to get ouh captain to talk again."

"Yeah, I know." Leynne had just grabbed the doorknob when Link quickly spoke up, "Hey, Leynne?"

"Yes?" Leynne asked, looking over his shoulder.

"Ask Irleen if she could find Janni. There's something I wanna ask her."

"Ah you suh you can handle it this time? I would ratheh not have to dump anotheh bahrel of wateh on you; we only have so much."

"I'll be fine," Link told him as he started to take off his tunic. "What else could she tell me that would start all that again?"

"I do not know; I hadn't expected it to be a problem in the fihst place."