You guys are amazing! The responses to this rewrite rekindled my love for writing and reminded me why I loved writing for this site so much. So thank you, and I hope you stick around to see how this all goes. Shoutout to everyone who reviewed the last chapter and gave such encouraging words, and even the new readers who decided to join. I smile like a fool every time I get a review.
Disclaimer ~
Once again, I own nothing but way too much time, coffee and some old dusty plotbunnies that I keep in a cage and poke occasionally.
Everyday was a learning experience for the demon who paraded as a human. He learned quickly, and adapted just as fast. There were times though, when the damage was done and there was nothing he could do, to fix his previous ignorance.
Sebastian should never have introduced his Doll to his new master, he knew that now. In such a small amount of time, Ciel had grown to respect Kagome. He was fond of the miko, even with her broken soul.
His current master, despite how he acted or wanted to be perceived as, was just a boy. He was a child, abandoned by the gods, with no way of surviving without summoning a demon. He was known to be cruel with his words, and cold with his actions, but he was soft. The boy couldn't even stand the thought of the pain being inflicted on the helpless. If it was within the realm of his power, and by extension Sebastian's power, he showed abusers what fear truly felt like.
Sebastian, being the loyal butler he was, knew these secrets about his master.
Never though, did Sebastian think that his precious Doll would be at risk within Ciel's clutches.
Now, her life hung in the balance. Sebastian, bound by the commands of his contract, would have to kill his beautiful Doll, if he could not fix her. Ciel considered her tortured, continuous agony as a form of abuse, and he could no longer watch it happen before his eyes. The powerful demon was conflicted, torn between Ciel's soul, which he had spent a long time cultivating, and his Doll, who could feed him for eternity, if only he could fix her.
In the span of a century, Sebastian had been unable to fix his Doll. He could only cause her more pain, and witness her continued agony. Her soul was not cracked, nor diminished. No, her soul was shattered and melting into the shadows. Her immortality, a gift from the jewel she carried, would not let her die, no matter how much she begged for it. She needed a stronger being to cut her life short, to rip her throat out and bathe in her spilt blood.
Sebastian knew that was the true reason that Kagome stayed with him. She wanted death, and he was one of the few, powerful enough to grant that wish. That was why her begging had never ceased, and even now, with her fragile throat in his deadly claws, she leaned closer to him, urging him to make the final decision.
It would be so easy. So easy to clench his hand together and get rid of this obsession he had with the miko. Was she even worth it anymore? Was there no hope for her?
Sebastian's fingers clenched momentarily, his black claws digging even deeper into her throat. Blood swelled around his fingertips before tinkling down, a beautiful ruby trail appearing over her neck. She leaned further into his grasp, and he could feel her pulse quicken in anticipation as a pleased sigh escaped her lips. Her eyes were still dead to the world, but she was prepared to accept her blissful fate.
An inhuman hiss echoed through the empty room, as Sebastian ripped his hands away, taking care to not damage his Doll any further. Blood flew from his fingertips, splashing in a crimson arch around the room. A disappointed whimper escaped Kagome as once again, her wish was denied.
"Why?" Sebastian snarled at the human toy, his anger fueled by his misery. "Tell me who to kill to make this better! Give me some sign of life. What has broken you so badly, that a demon can not put you together again?"
"I'm sorry. I tried," the same response fell from her lips.
Sebastian had once told his young master, that demons could not love. He had no reason to doubt this claim before. Never in his very long life had he ever felt love. He had consumed the souls of children, babies, and had even raised a human spawn himself due to a contract's order, yet he had never grown to love anyone. Even his own siblings and parents did not love him, nor each other. It was simply not done with demons. Love was a weakness. Love was for humans, the weak filth that crawled upon the earth.
What was this feeling, if not love? A century he had traveled with his Doll. He had spent decades trying to piece her together, to bring the light back to her eyes. He had experienced many contacts, with her by his side. He had even chosen to stay on this plane of existence between contracts, since he knew the last of his innocent Doll would be consumed under the weight of Hell. He had done so much, had changed so much for her, and still his unbeating heart grieved at the sight of her blank stare. Every time she begged for death, he had to temper the instincts that made him want to destroy his surroundings.
Was this not how humans described love? The desire to protect, cherish and destroy anything that hurt their significant other? Even now, with the young master's order hanging over his head, Sebastian could not find the will to kill Kagome. She was his, and he was not ready to admit defeat yet.
Delicately, Sebastian scooped his Doll into his arms and exited his room, the calico feline following faithfully behind him. He strolled through the halls quickly and silently, a plan forming in his mind. After three left turns, a right turn, and then down a short hallway, Sebastian came across a beige color door with black trimming. Silver tribal markings danced across it, creating an Eden-like design.
This was Kagome's sanctuary. The room was done in soft shades of cream and white, to induce a comforting feeling. Large sitting pillows decorated the floor so his Doll would never find a reason to be on the cold floor. A large bay window let in the warm sunlight, with blankets and pillows decorating the small ledge in front. Two sides of the large room was dominated by towering black shelves, their cavities filled with books of all ages and genres. Finally, in the center of the room, rested two large plush chairs, facing each other with a small table between them.
Without breaking stride, Sebastian deposited the broken woman onto the window sill. He took a few moments to move her limbs, curling her thin legs onto one side, while still keeping them covered by her large dress. He once again moved her hands so they were together, and resting on her lap. Her head naturally tilted back to rest against the wall, her dead blue eyes moving on their own to look outside. Sebastian carefully swiped his gloves over her neck, cleaning the blood away from the already healed wounds.
Once she was displayed properly, Sebastian took his leave. He was slowly coming to the realization that he may not know how to fix his Doll. He did not interact with humans, and he had never tried to put shattered pieces together again. Still, he was not ready to give up. The weight of his young master's command still rested heavily on his non-existent soul.
He just needed a little help. He needed to speak with someone who knew about death, and had a hobby of piecing things together again.
`·.¸¸.·´´¯`··. . .·
She screamed in agony as another tentacle ripped its way through her body. Blood was splashed against the walls and floors, as angry snarling filled the air. Kagome tried to shelter her stomach by using her legs and arms to block the writhing limbs. Her stomach, thus far, has not been injured, despite the daily torture she experienced. It was just a small blessing, but it gave her the strength she needed to face another day.
"Where is it? Where have you hidden the jewel?" A dark voice roared out as another tentacle embedded itself into the girl's chest. "Where is it!"
Blood. Pain. Torture. It was all the same. Her pain. His pain. Their pain. It mixed together, creating an agonizing torture that hurt her worse than her torment alone. Through her pain, faces and time merged and danced together, creating a whole new world. After time, her throat could no longer produce any screams and the dark demon was forced to think of other ways to gain her attention.
Kagome was forced to keep her place, and listen as her sister cried out as she was ripped apart, limb by limb. Her brother was then forced to kneel before her, casting protective charms even as he died. Her lover stubbornly kept quiet, fighting her torturer every step of the way, and never showing his pain to her, or their enemy. The worse one, was when she was forced to listen to her son cry out for her, crying for a savior that she couldn't be. All of them, taking her secret to the grave, because she was the weak coward entrusted with the jewel.
"Am I not a kind master?" Kagome peeked her eyes up, submissively acknowledging the demon who had finally tamed her. "I have brought you a gift. Someone to keep you company."
There was no russet brown hair, or mischievous grin, but there was no mistaking the cream color tail. Kagome thanked her master as she crawled over to the boy, and held him close. She cuddled into her son as tears streaked down her cheeks. She had her son back. It was okay, she had somehow managed to save him.
Memories blurred and mixed. Pain and misery were always there, but sometimes, it was different. Time stretched and shortened at its own will, as Kagome stayed trapped in her physical cell, and her crumbling mind. Days meant nothing to her. Nights meant terror since that was when the dark demon would approach her. Sometimes he brought gifts, and sometimes he brought pain. In the end, they were the same to the crumbling mind of the miko.
He wanted something but Kagome's mind was breaking, no longer making sense of the words he spoke. Did he want food? Kagome had none. Food was a treat that she rarely got. She had no water to share either. There was a patch of floor, in the back corner, which was slightly softer than the rest. She normally slept there with her son, but he could have it, if he would stop touching and hurting her.
"Where is the jewel? Tell me where it rests!" Kagome didn't have a jewel. She had nothing but the scraps of clothes she wore, and her son. She didn't understand what he desired.
'Stop hurting me! I don't know! I don't know! It hurts. It hurts so much. Don't touch me. Don't touch there! Don't hurt me. I tried to behave. I tried to help. I don't know. Please leave me alone. Please.'
Pain and hunger. Kagome sat in her back corner, rocking back and forth as she rubbed her growing stomach. Even with hunger gnawing at her constantly, and food being a rarity, her stomach continued to grow and bulge. Her eldest son spent a lot of time sleeping. Kagome didn't think that he was feeling well. His skin was slightly green, and even when she used her water to bathe him, he continued to develope a bad odor. Maybe that was the reason the bugs were attracted to him. Kagome tried her best to keep the pests away, but there was more every night and even she was growing worried about the maggots. Shippo just had to bathe more, that would fix it. Kagome could fix everything, she just needed the chance.
More time continued to pass. The dark demon didn't hurt her as much anymore. He even offered her more food, murmuring in low tones when she refused to take it. Sometimes, he would sit in her room and try to coax her out of the corner she hid herself in, but Kagome didn't like his eyes. Shippo didn't like him either. Shippo's voice would often whisper awful things about the mystery man, and Kagome trusted her son's instincts. So she stayed in her corner, like a fearful pet.
One night, Kagome was harshly awakened from her nightmare-induced sleep. The sound of distress and fighting echoed around her room. Out of habit, the young woman curled into a protective ball, sheltering her son and stomach from any incoming attacks. The very walls were trembling and falling around her, and somebody was calling her name but she didn't want to leave. If she left, then the dark demon would hurt her.
She had to obey.
A feral scream escaped her as her body was picked up and rushed off. Kagome clutched her son closer to her, as she tried to struggle free, but the tanned body before her eye was toned with muscles and unyielding to her feeble attempts. She was too weak. She was too human. With a choked sob, Kagome hugged her son closer and let the man take her.
Water. Night. Howling. Some caverns, more caves, and many dark nights. Another person soon joined them on their journey. This male was taller, with white hair and white fur draped over his shoulder. He stayed by her kidnapper's side, only leaving to hunt so he could force Kagome to eat.
Caves. Darkness. Pain. The males were always watching her. It didn't take her long to learn that the shorter, darker male was a wolf demon; while the taller male was a dog demon. When tensions ran high, the male canines would get into fights right in front of her. One could shift into a large brown and black wolf, and the other was a monstrous white dog. The sight of the white canine would sent pain through Kagome's chest, but no matter how much she cried or searched, she couldn't find the injury that caused it. Often the dog battles would result in blood shed, causing more blood to rain on Kagome as she trembled in her new corner, and hugged her son for comfort.
Sometimes, they tried to speak to her.
"You have to let him go, Kagome. We need to bury him." No. Nobody was hurt, everything was just fine. Kagome whimpered and held her son closer as the wolf demon reached a hand towards them.
"Miko, he has no head. You need to let him go. He is dead." No, it was a lie! Why were these males telling her such awful lies? Shippo was just fine. He was sitting in her lap, begging quietly for Kagome to not let them take him. She had saved Shippo! Shippo was alive!
They stole him in the dead of night. Kagome screamed and attacked them when she awoke to find her son gone. She scratched and clawed the wolf demon, and he simply stood there, watching her with tearful eyes as she tried to kill him and fail. How dare he! How dare he kill her son!
It was the dog demon who wrapped his arms around her, and stopped her pitiful attacks. Kagome continued to scream and fight, attacking the arms that restrained her, but he just held her close, forcing her back to his chest as a strange comforting growl escaped him. One arm held her immobile while his free arm stroked her round stomach, soothing the painful kicks from inside.
What did it matter? She was too weak. She couldn't help her companions. Her lover died without knowing the truth. Her son had survived, only to be taken by the canine demons who held her hostage. She was only human. She was weak. She was worthless.
Kagome had shut down. She was still alive but her madness and depression was too heavy to fight against. She was a prisoner inside her own body. She obeyed so she wouldn't hurt again. She ate when told, slept when told, and even walked when coaxed, but there was no thought or emotion behind it. What did it matter? She was too weak to fight anymore, even against herself.
"There are two heartbeats. She carries a litter." The inuyokai was speaking to the ookami again, in a rare moment of calmness.
"It doesn't matter to me. Once Naraku is gone, I'll mark her and raise her pups as my own." The wolf demon's eyes flashed over to Kagome, who was huddled in a corner, staring at nothing. "Their father was a strong warrior, and my pack will respect that. We can help her."
"She is pack now. The family blood rests in her womb." The dog demon drew himself to his full height, glaring down at the crouched wolf. "Her pups should be raised with their own species. You can keep the miko, but the pups will be coming with me."
"You can not do that! It will break her. Those pups are the last chance we have at bringing her back."
"It matters not to this Sesshomaru. The pups are the priority. She may already be too broken to be fixed. Pups must be raised with a pack of their kind, and a mother. The miko can no longer provide that."
Kagome listened but she didn't respond. Her hands idly stroked her stomach, feeling a small kick as a response. There were pups inside her. Inuyasha would live on, through her pups. She just had to be strong. She couldn't let these males take them, like they took Shippo. She could be strong. She would prove it.
A small flicker of life started within her.
There was too much blood. Kagome's back arched as red liquid escaped from between her legs. The dark demon had found her. He was disappointed in her for escaping. She was being punished. The canine demons were trying to protect her, but even they couldn't fight all the tentacles.
Yelps, screams, and blood were her world. One tentacle dived into Kagome's protruding stomach. She could feel it moving, touching and tearing with every twitch. Her babies, her pups were wiggling, trying to escape, but her womb was their prison. The tentacle wrapped around one precious pup and ripped. Skin split, blood spilled and an innocent life was lost.
Kagome screamed as the unborn fetus was dropped into her lap. There was a patch of fuzzy white hair on top of her daughter's head, and she had soft, pointed nails that would have turned into claws if she had the chance to live. Tiny, unfurled white ears rested on top of her head.
A brown wolf, and a white canine attacked the tentacle before he could attack Kagome's womb again. Kagome didn't care anymore. She clutched her daughter to her chest, rocking her back and forth as her opened womb continued to bleed. Her world was growing dark as blood loss took its toll. With tears in her eyes, and a death grip on her child, Kagome fainted in a pool of her own blood.
It no longer mattered to her. She was weak. She was a disgusting human. She had woken up to empty arms, and a healed, flat stomach. It was too much for her. She was weak. A disgrace to anyone who dared to glance at her.
"Kagome, it wasn't your fault." The ookami held her close, rocking her back and forth as she sobbed. "It wasn't your fault."
"Miko, blame this Sesshomaru. I was not fast enough to stop him. I am alpha and I have failed the pack. Blame me."
"My pups. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." They tried to help her. The wolf demon tried to tell her about the beautiful son that also died in her womb. He had midnight black hair, and fuzzy black ears. He was the larger pup apparently, not that Kagome would ever get to see her twins together, and compare them. The mere thought of her children only caused her to cry more.
Emotions, they hurt. They hurt so much. She loved, and had her heart broken. She tried to be strong, and she was torn apart. She had disobeyed, and she was punished. She was a bad person. She wasn't perfect. She wasn't a doll.
But she could be.
To avoid hurt, she would obey. She walked when told. She attempted to heal like they wanted her too. With each lie, her soul withered away. She no longer cared. She didn't speak. She knew if she spoke, she'd disappoint someone. If she did things on her own, she would hurt someone. No, she could be obedient. She could be the doll that Naraku and these canine demons wanted. Maybe then, they would grant her wish.
Maybe then, they would kill her.
Time passed at its own pace. Sesshomaru left her shortly after her body physically healed, but he would occasionally visit. When he did visit, he would talk to her and try to get her to respond, but over time, his visit dwindled down until he rarely came to see her. The wolf demon tried to love and support her, but even a platonic touch would send her into a panic. After several years, the ookami admitted defeat and stopped trying to make Kagome his mate.
Soon she learned the name of the wolf demon, Kouga. She watched dully as he married a beautiful red wolf, who tried to be kind to her. She couldn't bring herself to be nice back. Kouga, this strange female's mate, had taken her eldest child, and failed to protect her unborn pups. She couldn't forgive them, not for the sins they've committed against her.
After time, Kagome stopped caring. She didn't care when Kouga first talked about his litter of newborn pups. She didn't feel anything . . . or so she thought. She wasn't prepared when Kouga first introduced her to his litter. The sight of the playful puppies only sent Kagome into hysterics. It wasn't fair! Was she not allowed pups because she was human? Was it because she was weak? Pain. Endless pain and agony were her new children.
Afterwards, Kagome never saw another newborn pup. She watched as the ookamis around her aged. The young children turned into adults. Kouga, her new faithful companion, started to show streaks of grey and silver throughout his hair and fur. No matter how much time passed though, Kouga always provided for her and made his pack care for her. Faces blurred together, as new pups were born and elders passed away. Sickness, old age, and battle claimed so many lives, but Kagome stayed the same. Not even Kouga could claim the title of immortality, like she could, and soon he too died. He fell in the midst of battle, like the warrior he always was.
His eldest son took over the pack, and the care of the Broken Miko was passed onto him. The cycle repeated. Kagome became the perfect doll. She was pretty, she was obedient and she was silent. She learned and watched from within her fleshy prison. Wolves were brash creatures, but they were traditional. They honored the order of the Prince of Wolves and they cared for Kagome, even if they didn't want too. They were truly beasts though, fighting like animals and therefore, most died at early ages.
Kagome was passed from father to son. Sometimes even from family to family. She traveled around the cave, watching as the pack grew smaller and smaller. They were killing each other off before they could replace the dead with new pups. It meant nothing to Kagome. Why should she celebrate new pups, when her own couldn't survive?
Time blurred. Faces mixed. Soon, there was only one wolf demon left. He was young, barely out of his puppy fangs when his family was slaughtered, and he was given the care of the Broken Miko. Kagome didn't care. She watched with a dead soul, as the pup struggled to care for her.
He couldn't get her to eat enough, and no matter how much fur he put on her, she was always shivering. He would chat with her, trying to break the centuries long silence, and Kagome would only stare back. The impatient wolf demon was growing tired of her. He was the last of a once powerful tribe, and all he had to show for it was a silent human.
Kagome knew she was only days away from getting her wish. The wolf demon was close to snapping. He wanted to feel her skin shred under his nails, and her blood drenching his fur. Kagome just wanted to die. She wanted to join her children and lover in the next life.
The dark demon changed everything. The wolf had come back, bleeding and angry. He had reached out a clawed hand, prepared to take his anger out on her when the other demon burst in. It was bloody. It was glorious. It was what she wished would happen to her. The new demon took his time, killing and destroying the wolf until he laid in a puddle of his own blood and feces.
Kagome waited eagerly for her turn. For the first time in centuries, Kagome felt hope. She knew this demon would be the one to kill her. She wanted it. She craved it.
Instead, the demon stole her away. He carried her to the new home, and took care of her. He tried to heal her, to fix her jagged cracks. Kagome wanted to show him that she appreciated it. That he was a good demon, even if he was evil. If she awake though, she would be weak and she would disappoint him. Instead, her thanks to him, would be her staying as the perfect doll. She would obey, she would understand, and she would listen until he decided to kill her. He tried to test her, to break her shell, but Kagome had centuries of practice and she only messed up twice.
The first time, Kagome wanted him to know her name. The wolves had already known her name, and she had no desire to lose her identity. She spoke once, and then continued her silence. The second time, Kagome thought 'Yasha had come back to her. He was in his inu form. Kagome could tell, because he was smaller than Sesshomaru and he looked like a mutt. It was definitely her lover. She tried to explain, to ask her forgiveness, but he died before she could. It was a prophetic sign. A sign that, for them to be together, they both had to die. 'Yasha was waiting for her to die, to join him.
She tried to go back to being the perfect toy, so Sebastian would kill her. It was so much harder this time though. There was fresh agony after spotting her rugged, white mutt. It was a new reminder of her failures, and the amount of time which had passed.
She tried to behave, to listen and obey like the spider demon taught her. Naraku had told her how everyone loved a beautiful doll, and nothing bad happen to her or those around her, when she was silent and obedient. Sebastian could test her, but Kagome's will was stronger. She would be perfect, so he could finish shattering her.
She knew what he wanted. The demon wanted the same thing as the wolves, and the spider before them. He wanted a toy. He wanted her to be flawless.
Kagome could do that. Kagome could become the demon's broken doll.
`·.¸¸.·´´¯`··. . .·
Ciel strolled into the room that Sebastian has hidden Kagome away in. His eyes flitter around, taking in the changes that had occurred over the years. This room use to be a play room, made for sets of toys that were once precious. Now, it was a room for another precious item, but this one belonged to his faithful demon.
He watched the unmoving woman, as he strode to the center of the room, and without pause, set up a small chess set that he was carrying. He took a seat on the side with the darker pieces, before turning his gaze to the human doll that his demon cared for.
"Kagome, come here and play a game with me."
Obediently the young woman got up from her seat, and with mechanical steps, she approached the table and took the empty side on the opposite end of the board. Her dead eyes scanned the board, before two dainty fingers picked up a knight, and moved it into play.
For several moves, Kagome obeyed Ciel's command and played the game to the best of her abilities. Even with slow movements, and a seemingly placid mind, Kagome was a tough opponent to beat. She spent time thinking her moves over, her dark eyes flying across the board, weighing her choices before she even reached out to move a piece. Ciel loved to play games with Kagome. Her childish thoughts seemed simple, but had a layer of complexity that kept him entertained.
"Kagome, how have you been lately?" Ciel tried to coax the girl into a conversation.
Kagome was reaching for a piece when his voice startled her. Her hands jerked back, knocking over her own bishop in the process. Clink! Glass hit glass, as the bishop fell and continued to roll around on the board. Kagome paused, seemingly unsure about her own movements which caused the sound. Her hand hovered over the board, trembling slightly as she continued to stare at the fallen bishop.
Ciel picked up the piece, placing it back in its original place. He moved a pawn forward, threatening her knight. She retaliated with another pawn, her lips moving slightly as she started to murmur to herself.
Ciel soon lost his queen to her rook, which caused an unusual smirk to cross her lips. The young earl however, didn't seem to care, as he continuously used his rook to chase her own king around.
"Sometimes you need to sacrifice powerful pieces to play a more strategic move. It was something my father thought me." Ciel found himself talking to Kagome, a habit that was forming quickly. It was surprisingly easy to talk to her, as she never gave a reaction to what she heard. It was akin to talking to yourself, without the guilt of doing so. "My mother was always concerned about keeping every pieces, and Madame Red is too aggressive of a player. Their tactics lost them a lot of useful pieces, instead of a chosen few."
He glanced up to see Kagome's wide blue eyes staring at Ciel, her head cocked to the head, like a confused puppy. She blinked once, and then once more, more slowly. For the first time, Kagome was actually looking at Ciel.
A spark entered her eyes, blazing to life as one weak hand reached out to lightly touch the top of Ciel's head. "Pup, what happened to your ears?"
Her light, bony touch sent shivers down Ciel's back, and he wanted to flinch away, while striking out. Something about her touch, send a mix of sensations down his spine. The sensation of spidery limbs raced down as his spine, followed closely by the gentlest warmth. He was torn between striking out, and embracing the odd sensations her touch brought. Instead, the young lord slipped out of her reach. Kagome's arm fell limply over the board, scattering the pieces across the table and effectively ending the game.
"Kagome, I want you to look at me." The young woman's eyes submissively fell on the boy, watching him as he retreated to the door. "I've heard tales about your white hound. Sebastian made it a rule that all canines are to be kept from you, for your own safety.
"I've never been good at following the commands of others."
Ciel hoped this worked like he wanted. There was a part of him that didn't want to be responsible for the woman's death. He too had grown to cherish her silent company, and he dreaded the day that her life would be cut short. Still, she was suffering and if it come down to it, Ciel would be that higher power to end her suffering.
"Kagome, I want you to meet someone special."
A soft woof was heard, as Ciel open the door and a choked gasp escaped Kagome's lips.
Can you spot the differences? (Do you even remember the original?)
'Update' Expectations - Expect an update once or twice a month. Though most of this story is written, I do want to pace myself so I can update my previous writing and get a lot of these plot holes fixed and the plot lined up. However, if a chapter reached 15 reviews, I will do my best to update the next weekend, as a reward for your lovely words!