Julie got up from her sitting position and knelt on both legs beside me.
"It's true?" she asked, a worried look on her face. I felt my chest tighten at the question and the look. Not being able to tell the truth for fear of being thought crazy was one thing, but not doing so made me feel guilty anyway. I had thought I would feel relief if the truth ever came out, so I felt even more guilty for my mistake.
"It is," Armen said, before I could speak, "And yet, he is no demon. I've felt no signs to indicate otherwise from him despite sitting beside him for hours. The real question is this: what is he?"
"Oh c'mon, demons don't exist," I answered, "I'm a person, just like you, I was just born somewhere else. Does it matter if it's another place here or another world?"
Tam shifted her weight beside me. I turned to see what she was doing, only for her to start poking and prodding me. The Qunari got very close indeed as she proceeded to inspect as much of me as possible. She pulled at my face, felt under the chest-plate of my armour, poked at my hip, and even groped me briefly, before finally relenting with a short hum.
Resisting didn't seem like a good idea at the time. Her daggerwork wasn't something to be crossed when she was barely an inch away, and given the bombshell that had just been dropped, I wasn't sure of her state of mind. Did she think I was something disguised as a human? More importantly, it was far from an unpleasant experience.
"What was that for?" I asked. She gave a blank look back in return, like the question was absurd.
"If you are not a demon, then you are definitely human," she concluded with a nod, as if my asking about it was further confirmation, "Anatomically speaking, there were no anomalies associated with Fade creatures." She returned to her previous place with a satisfied air.
"No shit, Sherlock," I half-laughed, "You could've just asked."
Tam sent a doubtful blank look my way in response. "How are we going to return to your world?" she asked, ignoring what I had said, "How did you come here?"
"Will another flying machine come?" Julie added, returning to a cheerful state. She was practically bouncing, actually.
"If we're going to leave quickly, it is probably the only way," Tam reasoned, "I've never flown before, though there are those that have."
The presumption that they'd be coming along for the ride if my countrymen came to rescue me emptied a lot of the worry out of my mind. I guessed the revelation didn't really change much for either of them. It just meant that their escape would be even more secure.
In truth, it actually provided even more motivation for them, given what they were trying to escape. Another world, where they'd be safe, beckoned. I was just glad they weren't running from me in horror, or getting ready to turn me over to some scripture-thumping crazies to burn me at the stake.
My affection for them beyond the aesthetic jumped up still further. Their outward motives were noble, if you can forgive the use of that word.
"I'm hoping they'll come, yes," I said to Julie, "My people are very smart. It might take a while, months even, but they'll find out what happened and will try a rescue."
This was entirely wishful thinking on my part, though it was not entirely illogical. A door opened once could be opened again, or so my mind told me.
I didn't speak of a possible consequence of such a doorway existing that was scratching at the back of my mind; the conquest of Thedas by the nations of Earth. Largely because I would have been perfectly happy to watch that unfold at that moment. The more I learned about the place, the less I liked. Very much not a noble sentiment. Regardless, I doubted my companions shared the opinion, which shows just how little I knew them in hindsight.
"What did happen?" asked Armen, leaning against his staff, "Describe how you came to Thedas."
Taking a deep breath in anticipation of a complicated story, I told him the tale.
How we were flying from one place to another when everything started to shake. The green sparks that flowed all over the helicopter's body, sticking to the metal like it was magnetic or something. Our rough landing and the death of the pilots.
Armen asked if the green light had touched me. I told him that it didn't, which set him mumbling to himself. Stuff about the Fade, demons, magi and who knew what else. None of which I understood, and most of which I still don't.
Unable to make out what he was saying, I turned my attention to the others again. Tam and Julie were whispering to each other. Which was alarming in itself, without what came next.
"Take off your clothes," Julie ordered, pointing at me.
I could have gotten enthusiastic about that command, especially coming from the two beautiful women who issued it, but the problem was that I very much doubted they wanted to have fun. They didn't look like they were up for that, and the timing was too bizarre to begin with. Not knowing why they were asking, I stood up and backed off a little. They followed together, choreography perfect.
"I don't think now's the best time," I replied lightheartedly.
The woman's face lit up with mischievous calculations. "Just do it," grinned Julie, "I promise we won't hurt you."
"Why does Tam look like she's going to?" I joked, taking another step back.
The Qunari's eyes flickered back and forth between me and the treeline in a very suspect manner. She wasn't wearing her trademark killer smile, which would have terrified me. She was just watching me, like I was something interesting she wanted to eat.
Julie looked at her accomplice, and her grin grew wider. Which didn't make me feel much better.
"She's just curious," she said, "Help me out here." She even fluttered her eyes for a moment, attempting to distract me.
And Maker help me, it worked. Julie always could distract me, and I am a sucker for a honeypot. The very two companions attempting the trick have always been able to push buttons. I got wise to the use of that sort of tactic later, as a result of the actions of a Tevinter magister and a bastard of a Rivaini pirate, may he rot in hell.
While I was busy going soft at the knees, Tam jumped on me.
She grabbed, swinging her arms around me, putting a leg behind one of mine and then using both our weight to drop me. I landed on my back in the soft grass, and she on top of me. Which I probably could have appreciated, given her feminine form. Except I was wearing armour, which made me entirely insensitive in the relevant areas of contact.
Plus the slight ache of my bruises were distracting. She quickly pinned my legs with her knees, and pushed my shoulders down with her hands. I began regretting my decision to resist, as Tam's mirthful face appeared not five inches away from the tip of my nose. She was enjoying herself.
"Alright, alright," I said, squirming a little for effect, "I give in!"
A fine example of protesting too much. Not that I couldn't have turned the situation around, it just would have required far more violence than I was prepared to inflict on the aggressor in this case. Besides, the view wasn't bad. Tam withdrew from my shoulders, but knelt to either side of my legs and crossed her arms across her chest, producing an interesting effect.
Julie sat down beside us, and began undoing the straps of my armour. I tried to help, but she slapped my hands as they moved to do so. It was too business-like to be anything untoward... Unfortunately. Delusions of rich rewards for rescuing the two beautiful women from the evil prison tower went away.
"Ouch!" I said, laying my hands on my head to avoid another strike.
"Just want to see your tattoos," Julie explained, "Relax."
"Why the hell didn't you say that?" I complained.
A dastardly smirk appeared on Julie's face. Damned prankster.
"Tam wondered if you would stop us from seeing them," she reported, "So I said that we shouldn't give you a choice."
"Because it would be funny to watch her take me down," I said, finishing her sentence.
"Now you're getting it!" she said, barely containing her laughter while patting my head like I was a dog. I could do nothing but click my tongue, nothing to say to her audacity. Like I said, prankster. It didn't dampen my infatuation in the slightest, though.
She pulled off the armour and had Tam stop trapping me. The Qunari complied. I sat up and rubbed my legs a little, trying to work the numbness out.
Both Julie and Tam sat down behind me, and rolled up my shirt to see my back. The poking and prodding began anew.
"See, I told you," said Julie, "He has a map of his world on his back, right there."
A soft poke to my left shoulder blade indicated as much. I shot a pained look at Armen, but he only had a shrug to provide as aid before returning to his own thoughts. I sighed and sat still. Better to let them get it out of their system.
"It seems be," agreed Tam, "But it's small, I can't make out the details."
I coughed twice to get their attention. The prodding stopped for a moment.
"We're not done yet," said Julie with false sweetness, "Just hang on a little more."
"If you want to see a map of my world, I have a better one than that," I said, ignoring her dismissal.
"Really?" she asked.
"Yeah," I replied, "Give over my pack there." Tam delivered it in a second.
I rolled down my shirt again, and sat against the side of the helicopter, dragging my armour and combat webbing with me. Armen recovered from his trance to start paying attention again. Once everyone was comfortable in a circle around me, I rummaged through the pack for the prize.
I unfolded the map in the middle of the group. It was a mixed physical and political map, showing both the major geographic features of my world and the borders of nations. I had brought it along to try and identify where in the world I was if I ran into anyone, where on Earth.
The others huddled to see, Armen standing behind the two women to gawk at it. I pointed to the north-western continent.
"This is my homeland," I said, "The United States of America."
"The one with all the wonders you kept talking about?" Tam asked.
"We're not the only ones with those things," I said, "But yes."
"Is that where you started from?" Julie asked, "Or were you somewhere else?"
"We weren't at home, no," I said, before pointing to an area near the connection between two other continents, "We were here, a place called Syria. Nasty place at the moment, it's just big desert for the most part. Most of the people hate us there too. We intervened after there was a civil war, to stop the flow of refugees from overwhelming our allies and to destroy … well, I suppose you would call it a death cult."
"You keep saying you are not a soldier," said Tam, "But you keep talking about a war."
I exhaled wearily. Not least because of memories of the many frustrations resulting from not being able to handle every situation like a soldier would. Sometimes, just killing a lot of people is a lot more simple in the short term, although it can make things a lot more complicated long-term if you do. A lesson I was yet to learn.
"I will explain that," I said, "I promise."
Tam seemed impatient, but I didn't give a nug's backside. It wasn't like she was eagerly giving me details about her life, and although I was interested, I certainly wasn't bugging her about it. I guessed a lot of the details from what she had said, of course.
Julie was eagerly taking in the entire map, and had picked it up. Her eyes were scanning every detail, as she got caught up in her enthusiasm for a moment. I watched in amusement, wondering if she was trying to work out how large Earth was compared to her world, which would have been my first instinct to check. In fact, she was doing something else, using a skill of hers that I would learn about shortly.
"You've said 'we' a couple of times now," said Armen, "Who else came with you?"
I felt a pang of sadness for the others, not to mention guilt. After all, here I was, cavorting about with two beautiful women, and those who had travelled with me were dead. The question needed an answer, but simply saying it didn't seem right. I got up, put on my armour and weapons again, and stretched out for a second.
"Come with me," I said, "I'll show you." The others followed readily enough.
I led them down the meadow and to the rock I had sheltered behind when the dragon had stomped its way towards me. There, the headstones and the shallow graves sat seemingly undisturbed. A row of them, where the soil was easiest to dig. Soil that was now hardened by the sun.
"What are these?" Julie asked, still carrying the map.
"Graves," intoned Tam solemnly, "For the dead."
"You don't burn your dead?" Armen asked.
"Depends on what god you believe in," I replied, "I didn't really know them, but I couldn't just leave them in the open."
Our enemies were perfectly happy to use our bodies as trophies, if they could get them.
I placed my hand on Patel's headstone, a tall slab that had sheered off the cliffs, remembering how he stood up to the dragonlings.
"These were soldiers too?" Tam asked.
"They were soldiers not peacekeepers, yes," I said, "They weren't under my command, and I didn't know them for more than an hour or so, but I couldn't just leave them to rot."
"I take it that you are not an Andrastian, then," Armen said.
Here we go, I thought to myself. "I don't even know what that means," I replied.
"It's worship of the Maker," Julie said, "And the saviour Andraste, who freed Thedas from slavery under the Old Tevinter Imperium and then ascended to join him as his bride. I'm not really qualified to explain better than that, though."
She had anticipated my next question.
I was intrigued a little by the language she used. The Maker sounded pretty much like God, the deity of many religions on Earth including my own. Though I was a very doubtful and passive believer at the best of times. Open worship for births, deaths and marriages strictly. Prayer only before battle, because you need every last bit of help.
That there was a saviour of this world, and the saviour being female was the really interesting part. I wondered for a moment if the Maker and God were the same deity. It is said on Earth that God works in mysterious ways.
Of course, the saviour on Earth and the saviour in Thedas were very much different, though I was clueless at the time. Plus there were other religions on Earth that didn't share the perspective and there are atheists who believed entirely in the natural world alone. I'm not one to say that anyone was wrong about it.
"It seems to me that there is no shortage of gods," said Tam, wandering down the line of stones, "I once thought the Qun was absolute truth. Now, I do not think it is possible for us mortals to ever know. We're too flawed."
"The gods didn't help these when a dragon came," Armen said, "What use are they?"
I couldn't argue with that, but it brought something less serious to mind.
"Well, someone once said that a prayer and a gun was a lot more effective than a prayer alone," I said, smiling to myself, "God helps those who help themselves."
"Exactly," replied Julie, "We can't expect divines to help us with every little thing. They have to concentrate on keeping the whole universe spinning."
"A convenient way of lamenting the lack of divine intervention in the world," mused Armen, "Much like the Chantry's claims that the Maker ignores humanity's pleas, because he is displeased with them."
"I suppose it is," I said, conceding the point. We were quiet for a moment, all of us doing our own thinking. I don't really remember what I was thinking about that brought up the next part of the conversation. Maybe it was Andraste.
"The Tevinter Imperium..." I thought aloud, "Was that a country?" The way they talked about it made it seem like they had been utterly defeated.
"It still exists, and remains one of the most powerful realms," replied Tam, "Ruled by mages, everyone else is essentially a slave to some degree. My people are fighting them even now."
"Sounds like a shithole," I said immediately, "Are there slave rebellions?"
"There are, occasionally," Julie replied, "Most of the time, the slaves just flee. The Qunari exploit them, more often than not." Tam nodded, confirming that last part.
One more thing to add to the list of moral and political abominations existing in Thedas, and everything thus far was nothing compared to the other things I would discover.
My impression of the place was held together entirely by the good character of my companions by this point, the only thing holding back my instinct to start a one-man war. I had a formidable arsenal to start regime changes, after all. But the armoury that had come through with me was actually the least powerful of the weapons at my disposal.
"I take it that you being Tamassran is why you know so much," said Armen, his cheerful tone somehow menacing.
Tam took it in her stride, and nodded. "Knowledge is the primary virtue of that profession, yes," she said.
Suddenly, a stomach growled loudly.
I smirked, as I realised both that the culprit was Julie and just how hungry I was myself. It had been morning since we had eaten, and I was still far from used to hunger. I would get used to it at various times.
"Sorry," she said, looking away in shame. Which was actually cute. I just wanted to hug her and laugh, though I was careful to give nothing away. Not that I fooled anyone.
Tam cocked an eyebrow, as Julie put a hand over her face in embarrassment, trying to hide a truly red blush. "That was the loudest stomach grumble I have ever heard," Tam said, deliberately adding to the embarrassment with a small grin. Julie quickly slapped the Qunari's arm once or twice, to get her to hush.
I exhaled a breath of amusement through my nose, deciding to spare everyone. "That's alright, I think it's time we ate and talked," I replied, "We seem to have a lot of questions about each other. Might as well get them out of the way over some steak."
"Steak?" asked Julie and Tam simultaneously, their eyes on fire. I should have remembered their fondness for meat, given how little they supposedly got to eat it. They were very happy.
"We can hardly eat chicken all the time," I joked.