Notes:

Hello lovelies!

Now, don't you worry. You're not dreaming! It is an actual update! And so soon! :D
This chapter for some reason was super easy to write, and I can never really help myself once I'm done. So here you go!
I hope you enjoy reading this one as much as I enjoyed writing it :')
Do keep in mind, though, that I can't promise that the next one will be as fast, so it'll probably a good week before the next one is ready.

PS: The format keeps getting screwed up, so apologies if something looks off!

ENJOY~!

Chapter 27: Let's talk about it

Hermione thought to herself that it would still take a lot of time before she would ever get used to the way shinobi transported themselves to another place. In a blink of an eye, the rowdy bar got exchanged for one of the most spectacular views she had ever seen. She couldn't stop the gasp from coming out as she steadied herself. Grasping the arm that had moved around her waist, she dared to take a small step closer to the edge, eyes big in wonder as she peered over the village. She couldn't believe how far up they were, it gave her the best view of the village no doubt. It was beautiful.

"Enjoying yourself?" Kakashi said from behind her, humour lacing his voice.

She hadn't forgotten his presence. How could she, with his arm still around her. Hermione had even felt his arm still her as she went closer to the edge, all too aware of him being there.

"It's- I don't think I've ever seen anything like this." She confessed. "It's beautiful."

She felt him move, still holding on to her and had to suppress a shiver as he hummed close to her ear. He wasn't touching her, other than his arm, but even that feeling was something else. Hermione knew it was the bond that was doing this, reminding her why they had left the bar. They should probably start talking about that. She was hesitant to say something about it, she didn't want to break this vibe that was currently surrounding them.

A bird of prey was heard overhead, successfully shifting the mood. She felt Kakashi pull her back a bit, away from the edge, before letting go completely, stepping away from her. Hermione turned to look at him, but his gaze was trained on the village beneath them. This was harder than she thought it was. In a way it was also incredibly frustrating. She wanted to be angry at him, knew she was afraid of him, but at the same time she couldn't help but feel drawn to him.

She watched as he glanced at her from the corner of his eye, before him nodding to something that looked like a bench carved out of some rocks to the side, "we can go sit there, if you want."

Hermione nodded in agreement, following him as he walked ahead of her. He sat down to the far right, giving her plenty of space to sit down as well. She suddenly felt incredibly nervous. She hadn't thought this through, had she? Merlin, honestly, what was she thinking? She just left a busy bar to be alone with the one man she had been terrified of. Who she still was terrified of. Shit. You're such an idiot, Hermione.

"You're having second thoughts." Kakashi said in a deceptively calm voice. It still irked her how he could sound so calm, yet felt anything but calm. "You're panicking," he added. "Why?"

"I-" she didn't know where to start. She was panicking, yes. But it somehow did and didn't make sense. She was so, so confused. All these feelings confused her so much. She dropped her head in her hands. "I don't know. I- I just-"

"Hey," suddenly he was in front of her, making her look up. He grabbed her wrist and straight away she felt a calmness come over her. Why was he always so fast? And how was he able to be so calm and thus calm her down so quickly? Not for the first time she wondered what he must have gone through to be able to control his own emotions like this. "I know I don't have the best track record when it comes to you, but I'm not going to hurt you. We're just going to talk, right?"

The words he said barely registered, still stuck on him controlling his emotions like that. It shouldn't be that easy for someone to do that. "What happened to you?"

"What?" Confusion was evident on the small part of his face that was visible.

"You're able to control your emotions like it's nothing.. That's not something that you just know how to do, Kakashi-san. That's something you learn because you have no choice. What happened to you?"

Suddenly, she felt extremely cold. In a blink of an eye, any and all feelings coming from Kakashi had disappeared. This all happened so sudden it left her gasping for air, as if something was ripped out of her. He let go of her, standing back up, turning away and taking a few steps away from her as well.

"It doesn't matter." He said, showing no emotion anymore. "That's not what we came here to talk about."

"Kakashi!" She cried out, reaching out as if trying to get a grasp on their connection which suddenly had seemingly severed. Another hand grasped her own shirt, trying to deal with the loss. "You can't-"

"Fuck- I'm sorry." As sudden as the loss of feeling him was, it was just as sudden when he let his control slip, feeling like she was punched in the chest by the intensity of his emotions as they came back at full force. Hermione grabbed his arm as if to steady herself, as she took a few deep breaths. "I'm not used to this." He said, as if that excused his actions.

"And you think I am?" She retorted, looking at him. She felt the tears in her eyes. That had really, really hurt her. It was almost like whatever linked them together had severed, but also hadn't. Hermione didn't even know how to explain it. "I have no more experience with this than you do. It's not like I go around randomly getting myself bonded with people, just for the hell of it." She snapped.

Kakashi stayed silent and still after that. Like he didn't dare to move, in any way. Well, this was off to a bad start again, wasn't it. How was it they always managed to do this? It was like they were unable to have a proper conversation. How were they supposed to be able to work all of this out, when they couldn't even have a normal talk?

"I'm sorry," she said. She really shouldn't have snapped at him like that, even though he did deserve it in her opinion.

What the hell was he thinking? The moment he forcefully reeled back his emotions, locking them away, away from the bond, he probably felt the same thing she did, only reacting to it differently. He had to bite back a cry at the immeasurable pain it caused. What the hell was this bond?! It took him a moment to get his act together. Took longer than he'd like to admit to release the tight grip he had on his control.

"No," he said. "I am". And he was. He shouldn't have done that, but… But now, at least he knew that this ran deeper than he could've ever imagined. He turned back towards her, watching her as she kept taking deep breaths to lessen the pain.

"I'm- I'm no good at this," he confessed softly. And he wasn't. Kakashi and any form of a relationship with anyone just didn't mix. He didn't even have friends, not really. Sure, he had Gai. But Gai was an exception to the rule. That guy was just too stubborn to listen to him.

Kakashi had learned very early on in life that in the end the only one he could rely on would be himself. He had been by himself for the past thirteen to fourteen years. And sure, while he did have Minato-sensei and his team for a little while.. It didn't last. They were all dead now. Maybe that's one of the reasons why he couldn't accept this bond for what it was. He knew, for a fact, that it wouldn't last. Everyone who got close to him, got hurt or died. It was a fact. He was cursed. He knew it, there was no other explanation.

"You're not."

Kakashi looked up in confusion. Had he missed her speaking before? He wasn't what?

"You're not cursed." She clarified. He groaned mentally, had he really said that out loud? He needed to stop doing that.

"Yes, I am."

"No, you-""Please, don't." He said. This would only lead to them arguing, which is exactly what they weren't supposed to be doing. "You said we should talk about the bond. So let's talk about that." He said, changing the subject. He heard Hermione sigh, deciding now was probably a good time to get back up, slowly removing her hand from his arm. Kakashi stepped to the side, sitting down in the same spot he had sat before.

"You're right, Kakashi-san. We should talk about that. Just- You do know that at some point we will have to talk about that as well, right?"

"Not if I can help it," he murmured. "Not as long as I still have a choice in the matter. Not as long as I still have a bit of free will." This was not something he felt like discussing. Ever. The only reason he agreed to talk to her was because he wanted to know more about it, but that didn't mean he was going to share his life story with her. This was still something he didn't ask for. Something he didn't want.

"Do you think you're the only one who who dislikes the fact that their free will is taken from them?"

Kakashi looked at her, surprised. Had she just- "You can understand what I'm saying?" He would have to watch what was being said around her, knowing this.

Hermione nodded, "a little," she said with a heavy accent. "The verbal part is still a bit of an issue though, but I've been learning. I can understand quite a bit, I just don't really speak the language yet." She said, shrugging. "Anyways, we're in the same boat, you and I. I don't like this any more than you do. It's something we will have to work on, we'll have to figure out a way to deal with this. But do not, ever, think you're the only one dealing with this. This wasn't my choice either." She ended harshly, looking at him as if he insulted her. And he had, in a way, hadn't he?

"Anyways," She said with a much lighter tone. "I think it would be a good idea to not do that again, Kakashi-san. I wasn't lying when I said the bond is fighting us."

Kakashi snorted. "Yeah, I noticed." He looked down at his hands, rubbing them together. He didn't think something like that would be possible. How something like that could fight like that, like it was… Alive.

"I think," she said. "I think normally when a bond like this occurs, it's with people that already know each other. At least that's what I've read about it." From the corner of his eye, he saw her turning to him. "Obviously we didn't know each other before any of this. So I tried to find out what would cause it then.""What would cause it? Didn't you say it was random, before?""Yes, I did. And it still is. Random, I mean. Just because people know each other beforehand, doesn't mean the bond doesn't happen at random."She had a point, of course she did. But what did that mean then? If they didn't know each other beforehand, and that was supposed to be a requirement for forming a bond like this, what was it between them for this to happen?

"Did you?"

"Hm?""You said you tried to find out what would be the cause of our bond. Did you?"

"Yes, I did, or I think I did. It's not something that makes sense, just yet. Hopefully it will once we get to know each other a bit more. But anyways, it has something to do with our birthdays and-" She started explaining, but was interrupted by Kakashi suddenly standing up. She felt a spike of anger coming from him, which was directed at whoever it was that was coming their way, it would seem. She followed his gaze to see Genma run towards them. Oh, right. She had forgotten about what she had promised him. Oops.

Flashback a few hours ago

"Hermione-san!" Inoichi called from the hallway. She hesitantly made her way there, not sure what to expect.

"Yes?"

"Someone's here to see you."

Inoichi looked at her for a moment, before stepping to the side, revealing whoever it was that had called for her. It was a man, maybe a little older than she was. He had brown hair, reaching his jaw. A blue bandana was tied around his head, at the front, which looked a bit weird if she was honest, and lastly he had some sort of pin in his mouth, like an oversized toothpick.

"Can I help you?" Hermione said in their language, not sure what he would want from her. He looked vaguely familiar, but couldn't place him.

"Ah, yes," he responded in English, with a wink. She was glad he spoke English, that made it a bit easier for her. "I'm not sure if you remember me. We met when- uh, in the forest?" He finished awkwardly. Of course, she remembered him now. He was the one who had carried her out of the building when she was too frightened of Kakashi.

"Right." She said. "It doesn't explain what you are doing here, um-"

"Genma," he said. "Shiranui Genma. And, I was wondering- Well, there's this bar closeby where some friends and I were going tonight and I figured maybe you wanted to join me. Get out of the house for a while, y'know?"

She.. hadn't expected that. "Oh, um, well-" she didn't know what to say. She hadn't been asked out like this, ever. Hermione looked behind her, to Inoichi.

"It's up to you, Hermione-san." He said. But he didn't look too worried, not like he had done with Kakashi, so she figured it was alright.

"Right, um, sure. Sure, Genma-san, I guess I could use a night out."

"Awesome!" He said, flashing a smile. "I'll pick you up around nine, is that okay?"

"Sure, I'll see you then."

The time went by faster than she had expected and before she knew it, a knock was heard on the door. She had spent the remainder of the afternoon with Inoichi's wife. Hermione had been quite surprised when she had offered to take Hermione shopping, knowing she barely had any clothes. At first she refused, saying that they had already done so much for her, but the woman wouldn't listen.

Hermione went to the door, pulling her vest over her shoulder, before opening the door. "Hi," she said.

"Hey, wow, you look great! Uh, ready to go?"

"Yep, all ready." She said stepping outside and closing the door behind her, putting a strand of hair that had gotten loose behind her ear. "Which way?"

Genma pointed to his left, "this way. It's a short walk, I hope you don't mind." Hermione shook her head and followed him as he led the way.

They talked a bit along the way, nothing too trivial though. A few minutes later, she saw the bar. Hermione felt her arm getting grabbed, turning towards Genma in question.

"Hey, listen. Before we go in there. Um, I probably should've told you. There's a party going on in there. Y'know, for Kakashi's birthday. He probably won't show though, he doesn't do parties like that, so you shouldn't have to worry about that." Which she didn't. Worst case scenario, she'd just go back home. The bar was full of people though, she wasn't sure how she felt about that. "Just- Well, can you promise me you won't leave with him? Like, talking to him in the bar is fine, but, you can't leave with him. I need you to promise that."

"Why?" Hermione frowned at him. It was an odd request of someone who she thought was at least familiar with Kakashi. Why else show up at his birthday party, whether he showed up or not?

"Just, promise me, okay?" Genma looked very serious, silently begging her to comply.

"Uh, okay, I guess?" Hermione wasn't sure about it though. It really didn't make any sense. While she didn't mind Genma's company up until this point, she wasn't sure who she felt more comfortable with.

"Okay, good. Good. Well, let's go in, Hermione-san!"

End flashback

He looked upset, really upset as he stopped in front of them. She heard Genma say something, but couldn't understand it, he was talking too fast, using words she hadn't learned. Looking behind her, Hermione saw Kakashi stand rigid, an angry look on his face.

"Guys, please." She tried, but they completely ignored her, continuing their standoff.

Until Genma turned to her and said, "Hermione-san, we're leaving."

"No, she's not." Kakashi said instead.

"Excuse me?! I can make my own decisions, Kakashi-san." She said over her shoulder and then turned to Genma, who had a small smirk on his face. "And I'm not leaving. We were just talking, Genma-san. I'm absolutely fine."

"I told you not to leave with him, Hermione-san. You promised"

"What?!" Kakashi hissed. "What the fuck, Genma?"

"You know the reason, Kakashi. You're not supposed to-""It was never an order, Genma. Do you think she would've been allowed to the bar with you if it was?""Would either one of you please tell me what's going on?" Hermione yelled. "Stop talking over me. I'm right here."

Kakashi sighed, "after I attacked you, they wanted to keep us separated, for obvious reasons. In order for me to actually stay away from you, giving us both time to figure things out, I was sent on a mission." He explained. "But I was never ordered to stay away, Genma. It was never an order. So stop treating it like it was."

"But-"

"Stop." Hermione said, holding up her hand. She felt extremely annoyed by this whole thing. She understood what Kakashi had said, explaining the Hokage's decision to let her stay at the Yamanakas, but no one asked her. Why couldn't they just ask her? Didn't she have any say in this? Well, she knew she didn't have much of a say it in, but it was all decided for her, not even letting her know. They just dumped everything on her. Well, no more. They'd given her this much freedom up until now, so she was going to use it.

"Genma-san. I really appreciate you looking out for me. I understand your reasoning in this." She started. As she said that, she felt Kakashi's emotion whirl out. She looked at him and shook her head, getting a confused look in return. He really didn't need to feel like that now, because, "however, we were just talking and it's a conversation I feel is important and I would like to continue. I hope you understand, Genma-san."

Oh my god, really? She threw another look at Kakashi, raising her eyebrow. Hermione had to refrain from rolling her eyes at the pleased feeling she was getting from him. Men. Ugh, they're all the same. She looked back to see Genma relaxing his stance.

"You're absolutely certain, Hermione-san?"

"Yes. It's fine. Kakashi-san will take me home in a bit."

"Right, okay. I'll get back to the party then." He said, turning to walk away. "Oh, by the way, Kakashi? The entire team saw you leaving with her. As did plenty of others in the bar."

"So?" Kakashi asked.

"So," Genma said, stretching the word, "everyone thinks you've got yourself a lady friend," he said with a big smirk. "Sorry about that Hermione-san. Best of luck with that." The man sounded like he was having too much fun with this. A second later, they were alone again.

Kakashi groaned as he sat back down, Hermione following his example. "Well, that was interesting."

"That's an understatement. Why was he being so hard on you, Kakashi-san? Why were any of them so hard on you?"

"You're joking right?" He said. "I attacked you, Hermione-san. I could've killed you. It only makes sense that they're being hard on me. They still went easy on me."

"What?" She looked at him incredulously, "you're joking."

"No, I'm really not."

Kakashi sighed as he looked at his feet. He still thought that the Hokage let him off easily, even if he was threatened with going to prison. That still wouldn't have been a hard enough punishment.

"It wasn't your fault, though. I shouldn't have touched you when I did. I should've known better."

Kakashi hummed in response, knowing they would have to agree to disagree. They would never think the other was at fault. They both thought they were the one to blame and, fuck, wasn't this all fucked up?

"I probably should get back home, though. Maybe we can catch up again, later this week? Have another talk?" She offered.

"Yeah, we can do that." It actually went alright this time around, not counting the mishap with the control on his emotions. All in all, he wouldn't mind doing this again. Maybe if they practised a bit more, they'd be able to have a conversation without any issues or interruptions.

"Take me home?"

Kakashi huffed, with a smile. What was this, a date? Which reminded him… Fuck. A lot of people had seen them leaving and Gai- Shit. He needed to go do some damage control after he took her home.

"Sure, let's go." He said with a sigh.

He got up and held out his hand, silently asking her to take it. She smiled at him when she did. She gave him a nod, signalling she was ready as she turned to look at the village one more time. A moment later, they appeared in front of the Yamanaka house. He let go of her, stepping to the side, just in case Inoichi would come outside at his arrival.

"Thanks for the talk, Kakashi-san." Hermione told him with a smile. "Oh! Before I forget, I've been meaning to ask you something."

"Ask me what?""Do you know who Teddy changed into? The face seemed a little familiar, but I can't place it.""His face?""Yeah, when you brought him back to me."Oh shit. His face. His. Teddy had adopted his face when he had found him. "Oh, uh, I'm not sure I didn't really pay attention to it." Kakashi mentally whacked his own head. 'I didn't pay attention'? That's what you come up with?

"But you carried him around, surely you've looked at his face and noticed it was different. I find it a bit hard to believe that you weren't paying attention to him." Hermione said, rightfully so. Why must she be observant? Of course he paid attention.

"I don't know, Hermione-san." He said, trying to brush her off, hoping she would just take his answer for what it was, no matter how stupid he sounded.

Suddenly she was in his face, watching him closely. If anyone would ever say he flinched, he would deny it. "Hm," was the only thing she said.

"What?" He asked, getting annoyed with the whole situation.

"I don't know," she said, sounding too cheerful for it to be believable, as she moved back. "Enjoy the rest of your evening, Kakashi-san." He just looked at her as she moved towards the door, opening it. "Oh, it's a cute beauty mark, by the way." Was the last thing she said, pointing at her chin as she slipped inside, giving him a wink before closing the door.

She knew. Fuck.

Notes:

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