I could not wait any longer to share this with you! We're finally into the real heart of the story, and I am not only loving writing it but also loving to hear what you all think. BIG things are still coming! Enjoy!
XIII. Scripted
"I'm sorry," was the first thing that Nina could wrench from her throat, already feeling as though she had run a mile. She had to tell her, Kim deserved to know long before they had reached that point.
"What're you sorry for?" Kim giggled, sparing a glance in her direction. Nina couldn't meet her curious stare, opting to wait until Kim's eyes had returned to the road before she continued.
"I have been an awful friend," she admitted, shaking her head. She spoke again before Kim could try to tell her otherwise. "I've been doing something that I knew would hurt you, and I've been a little bitch who was too afraid to tell you, and I'm sorry."
Kim's eyebrows were furrowed, a finger beginning to tap nervously at the top of the steering wheel. She remained silent. Nina inhaled, nodding once to herself before exhaling.
"I like Jared."
Kim winced as though she had been slapped, and Nina closed her eyes for the briefest of moments, her chest clenching with guilt. She nearly gagged on the words as she finished the fatal blow of a sentence.
"And he likes me too."
Kim's lips had become a thin line across her broad face, her expression indescribable as they pulled into the school parking lot. The silence was deafening as Nina waited for her to shift the car into park. She wordlessly did so, unbuckled herself, and finally faced her.
Nina forced herself to meet Kim's misty eyes, the sight everything she had hoped to avoid.
"I'm sorry," Nina repeated, her voice falling to a whisper. She bit at the side of her mouth, eyes remaining on Kim's face.
"The whole time?" Her voice was just as quiet as Nina's had been, scratchy where Nina's had been breathy.
"No," Nina shook her head, "no, not the whole time."
The car fell painfully silent again. Around them, more people were pulling in, and Nina was sure Paul and Jared were somewhere within their wolfy earshot. Minutes passed in silence, Kim's eyes falling out of focus and Nina's remaining on her.
"Why?"
She finally looked up as her voice cracked, the strain of her emotions revealing itself in the form of a tear gliding down her tanned cheek.
Nina's lips parted slightly and she shook her head, looking for the right words, the safe words.
"I didn't mean for it to happen, Kimmy, I-"
"Why couldn't he ever want me?"
Nina was taken back, beginning to shake her head immediately, mouth opening and closing, "No no," she reached for Kim's hand, but she snatched it away before contact could be made.
"It's nothing wrong with you, Kim, it's…" her words escaped her, the truth unable to be spilled. Kim, her own hand still clutched against her chest, shook her head, the tears openly flowing as she spoke, her tone uncharacteristically harsh.
"It's what, Nina? If it's not something wrong with me, if it's not after years of me wanting him not being enough to keep him from wanting you the moment you give him the time of day, then what is it?"
Nina stared at her, lips pursed, speechless.
Kim was the first to break their eye-contact, shaking her head and murmuring something as she swung her bag from the backseat. She clumsily leapt from the car before Nina could say anything, slamming the door and hurrying towards the school.
"Kim, hold on!"
Nina was behind her in a moment, catching up as they reached the base of the steps. She could sense Jared's eyes on her, but she didn't dare look for him.
"I don't want to talk to you right now," Kim spoke quietly, her bashfulness enough to keep her from making a scene. She wiped at her tears rather aggressively. "I don't know when," she paused, swallowing down a pitchy note, "or if, I'm going to want to talk to you."
"Don't say that-"
"You knew better than anyone how I've felt about him, and you just couldn't stay out of it."
With that, she was turning on her heels and bounding up the front steps, letting the door begin to close behind her. Nina was left speechless, once more, Kim's reaction everything she deserved it to be.
"Let's head to class."
And then Jared was there, speaking against her hair as a warm hand nudged her up the stairs, remaining on her back until they had reached a classroom. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't find words for him. Though she was grateful he was there beside her, and she knew it wasn't his fault that the last few months of their lives had evolved as they had, she still couldn't find words she wanted to speak to him.
"I'll see you later," he murmured against her forehead, kissing the spot as he did so. She sighed and nodded, the flutter in her chest proving futile against the guilt in her gut.
While Nina never particularly paid attention in class, that day was like she wasn't even at school. She thought of Kim's face, blotchy red with tears. Kim was always sensitive, so her tears weren't something Nina wasn't necessarily used to, but they were always caused by things like happy endings to romance movies or seeing hurt animals in the woods- never because Nina had betrayed her.
By lunchtime, Kim had made herself scarce, and Nina couldn't decide if she thought she was eating lunch in the library or if she had simply gone home. She was surprised as Paul approached her locker, Jared nowhere in sight, and she tried to resist sighing as he smirked at her.
"There's my new best friend," he reached a hand out, ruffling the top of her hair rather aggressively. She swatted at his hand, glaring up at him as she ran her fingers through her hair, shutting her locker. He watched patiently, his smirk taking up his whole face.
"Where's Jared?" She began walking, sure that Paul would follow her.
He dramatically rolled his eyes as he did, staring down at her. "Are you two gonna be the new Sam and Emily? Can't stand a couple hours away from each other?" When she didn't respond, he continued, "you know, that could be pretty difficult since you treat your house like Area 51 and Jared's never had a girl over to his place."
"My house is not Area 51," Nina finally gave in, chuckling as they entered the cafeteria. As expected, Kim was nowhere to be seen.
"Could've fooled me," Paul snorted, shaking his head. They continued into the lunchline together. "And Jared's helping Sam, by the way. We've got a new addition," he winked down at her as they neared their seats.
Nina's eyes fluttered about, landing on Jacob Black with curiosity. He certainly looked larger than before, but he was there.
"Yeah," Paul cackled, shoving nearly a whole cheeseburger into his mouth, "that's what we all thought too. Nobody saw this one coming."
Nina looked back at him, an eyebrow raised. He gestured with his hand back to the table where Jacob Black sat. She gasped excitedly as she turned back to Paul.
"Embry Call?"
Paul laughed loudly, food spilling out of his mouth as he nodded. Nina cringed as she took a bite of her sandwich.
"You know what that means, right?"
When she shook her head no, he grinned, leaning forward on his elbows. She mirrored his movement.
"That means someone's dad has some explaining to do, his mom's Makah and didn't come here until she was pregnant with him."
Nina raised an eyebrow, her eyes narrowing.
"Jesus, aren't you supposed to be smart?"
"I'm sorry that I don't understand how all of this wolf stuff works!"
They were whispering harshly to one another at that point before Paul released a chuckle, shaking his head and sitting back slightly.
"The gene to shift is only a Quileute thing, meaning some kid from the Makah rez wouldn't be able to do it. Soo, someone just got a new brother," he laughed once more before diving into his food.
Paul was by her side for the remainder of the day, chirping in remarks as though she were Jared. She appreciated his friendship, whether or not she wanted it, but it didn't completely take her mind off of Kim. She had decided that she had probably gone home, and Nina tried to not think too much of how bad the coming days would be.
After school, Paul led them to his truck, chattering about what Embry joining the pack would do for their patrol schedules, potentially opening up more time for him to sleep at Emily's.
"Why didn't you go to help with Embry?" Nina asked, plopping her bag on the floor and buckling herself in. Paul's truck was loud as he brought it to life, and she couldn't think of a more appropriate vehicle for someone who loved attention like he did.
Paul snorted. "They said I'd probably just make it harder for him to calm down," he rolled his eyes.
Nina laughed, ignoring Paul's glare as he began driving. He immediately began towards Emily's house, turning up the radio and singing rather obnoxiously. Nina ignored him and his grins in her direction as they went, opting to watch the greenery and imagine a brown wolf was running through it somewhere within.
Emily was working on a craft when they walked in, the house beautifully warm by comparison to the temperature outside. December was creeping in on them like a predator.
"There you two are," Emily smiled, leaning forwards on the counter. Beside her sat a chunk of wood and a small knife, shavings littering the surrounding area. With just one look at Nina, her lips pursed. Her eyes flickered between the two teens.
"Everything alright?"
"Nina told Kim that her and Jared are hot for each other," Paul chuckled, plopping into a seat at the kitchen table, "she didn't exactly give them her blessings."
Emily's face faltered, her good side falling to match the crestfallen appearance of the other, "I'm sorry, babe," she came around the corner to rest a hand on Nina's arm, "it'll all work out."
Nina tilted her head slightly, pursing her lips, "I'm not so sure, but thanks."
Paul and Emily fought back and forth throughout the afternoon as he continued to steal food from the fridge following lunch. Nina flipped through her physics notes from her seat at the counter, chuckling occasionally as the others argued. Her eyes scanned the words in front of her, but her mind was elsewhere.
It wasn't until nearly dinner when Jared came through the front door, his tired eyes lighting up at the sight of Nina. It took merely two large steps before he reached her, hands cupping her face on either side and eyes twinkling down at her.
"Hey," he breathed. She couldn't help but smile, casting her notes to the countertop and bringing her hands to grasp his wrists.
From across the kitchen, Paul made a loud gagging noise. In just one smooth motion, Jared had swiped a pencil from Nina's pile and it was flying in Paul's direction. He swatted it easily from the air and raised his middle finger in their direction.
"How is he?" Emily asked, ignoring the scene unfolding in her kitchen.
Jared's eyes never left Nina's face as he spoke, a thumb gingerly rubbing against one of her cheeks. She allowed her eyes to flutter shut. "He's pretty calm, he'll be fine. He's just a little scared, that's all."
Emily hummed a response, her attention falling back on the pan on the stove.
"Sam says he'll probably be able to bring him in for dinner, though," Jared shrugged, leaning in and kissing Nina's forehead before he began to pull them towards the table. She had had casual boyfriends before, but she couldn't remember ever receiving so much affection- though she had never been any of the others' imprints either.
Emily was pleased at his information, setting another plate at the table.
Sam arrived shortly after, holding the front door open as Embry Call gingerly stepped inside. His movements seemed forced in an attempt to look natural, and he avoided eye-contact with everyone, despite their eyes all on him. Nina had never paid much attention to Embry Call or his friends, but she knew enough to recognize just how different he looked, her mind- and eyes- flickering to Jared and his own transformation.
Embry remained relatively quiet as dinner began, very polite, yet unable to meet anyone's eyes. Sam had introduced them all to him, and his eyes had lingered slightly on Emily and Nina, though he had said nothing until they were nearly done eating.
"So…" he began, awkwardly setting down his utensils. His eyes fluttered around the table, "can girls do this whole 'wolf' thing too?"
Emily smiled warmly, shaking her head, "Oh no, just you boys. Nina and I are imprints."
"Imprints…" he pondered the word, squinting his eyes slightly.
"Imprinting is essentially how we shapeshifters find our soulmates," Sam answered simply.
"Does everyone get one?"
Paul snorted. With a glare in his direction, Sam answered.
"It's relatively rare as far as we know, but half of us have imprints already, so…" he shrugged, continuing on with his meal.
"That's why Nina's face is the only thing I could see in Jared's head," Embry muttered, chuckling. Paul cackled once more, and even Sam cracked a smile as Jared's face flushed from across the table.
It had been three days since Nina had told Kim the truth, and Kim had held her resolve, turning her face or looking downwards when there was opportunity for eye-contact. Nina didn't blame her, and she was sure it was just the beginning, but living a life without Kim was one that she had never dreamt of. Her time with Emily accounted for most of her days, and she loved that time, but it wasn't the same. Her chest ached on occasion in a way that reminded her only of when Jared was gone for too long, and that in itself was unsettling.
"I think I should meet your mom," Jared announced proudly from across Emily's table. Nina dropped her pencil at the statement, swallowing harshly before looking up to meet his eyes.
They had been, by Nina's demand, working on homework, though she doubted his commitment as her eyes scanned the empty page in front of him.
"Why would you think that?" She raised an eyebrow.
"Oh come on, isn't that how this is supposed to go?"
From her spot in her recliner, Emily lifted an eyebrow as well. She set down the magazine she had been reading, an edition focused on leather carving, and watched as their conversation progressed.
"What is this?" Nina chuckled, crinkling her nose.
Jared rolled his eyes dramatically, leaning forward on the table and reaching a gargantuan hand towards hers, "you know what this is."
She stared at him, the edges of her lips daring to quirk upwards. She fought the blush that danced along the edges of her face, though she doubted it had gone unnoticed by him for that long already; he had already pointed out twice in that week that he had noticed her heart rate speeding up.
With a sharp exhale from her nose, Nina moved her eyes back to the work in front of her, grinning as she spoke, "this is incomplete homework, and I want to be ahead by winter break so I can go hiking."
Jared groaned, standing as he reached across the table and swept her work to the floor. Nina's mouth opened with a gasp, her eyes jumping to his face as he grinned down at her.
"I'm going to meet your mom, and you're gonna meet my parents. Maybe this weekend?" He raised an eyebrow in challenge, his eyes dancing with mischief. For a moment, Nina could only stare at him in awe, both dazzled by his handsome playfulness and irritated at his aversion to schoolwork- or seriousness of any sort, for that matter.
"And," he chuckled, sitting back down in his seat and picking up his pen, "I will gladly join you on these hikes you're planning."
Once again, Nina found herself staring at him, disbelief on her pretty face. Emily, though she had picked her magazine back up, snorted out a laugh.
The weekend came, signifying an entire school-week without a word from Kim, and Nina found herself wondering if that would become her permanent "normal." She had agreed, though she supposed he would've charged forward regardless, to let Jared come to the door to pick her up Saturday morning and be introduced to her mother. She was nearly gagging with nerves as she got dressed for the day, a new knot forming in her stomach with each sound her mother made from the kitchen.
And then she heard it: the knock on the front door.
The movement in the kitchen stopped for a moment, and Nina took the opportunity to quickly emerge from her room, eyes too wide to pass for casual as she took in her mother's work uniform. She hoisted her backpack higher on her shoulders.
"Who's here?" Her mother asked, an eyebrow raised. Her hair was pulled into a ponytail, though Nina noticed some lumps along the top of it. She pursed her lips.
"Uhm," she breathed. Her nose crinkled. With a sigh, she marched to the door and opened it.
Jared greeted her with a smile, a hand twitching out towards her immediately, though he retracted it as his eyes moved past her. She could feel her mother's eyeballs flickering between the back of her head and his face. He nodded swiftly to her, and she inhaled deeply as she turned to face her mother once more.
"This is Jared, he's-"
"I'm Jared, Nina's boyfriend," and then he was smiling even wider than before, moving forward with confidence and a hand extended towards her mother. She stood in pure shock for a moment before she came back to herself, mouth falling open as she followed him back to the kitchen.
"Boyfriend?" Her mother croaked. Though she appeared just as shocked as Nina felt, her mother's lips curved into somewhat of a grin as she received Jared's hand, shaking it rather absentmindedly as she looked between the two of them.
"Yes ma'am," Jared nodded. As he released her hand, he brought the arm to carefully wrap around Nina's shoulders.
Her mother hummed, eyes still fluttering between the two of them. Seconds felt like an eternity as Jared's heat burned into her side, her discomfort evident across her face.
"Marion Reed," her mother nodded, picking up her coffee mug and taking a sip, "must've taken quite the convincing for her to let you meet me."
"I didn't really have a choice," Nina muttered. Her mother's eyes flickered to her for a moment before returning to Jared's face, and he squeezed her arm lightly as he spoke.
"We figured it was about time," he smiled. She was certain he was dazzling her mother more and more with each smile. Her mother hummed once more, eyes wandering up and down him as his size became more obvious within the small trailer.
"And I think it's about time we head out," Nina chuckled nervously. She took Jared's hand from her arm, beginning towards the door and praying he would allow her to tug him.
"It was great to meet you finally, I'm looking forward to seeing you again!" He planted his feet to finish his sentence before following along, chuckling as they crossed the threshold and were greeted by snow flurries.
They made it only to the bottom of the steps before he was pulling them to a stop, brushing a hand over her hair and kissing her forehead.
"See?" He smiled. He was practically glowing. "That wasn't bad at all, was it?"
Nina scoffed, rolling her eyes playfully before resuming their walk.
She had to admit that it wasn't as bad as she had anticipated- her mother was rather human for their interaction, and she even looked quite put-together. Jared was everything light and open in the world, and even her mother's perpetual storm cloud couldn't combat that. He had joined her side once more as they carried on, and though he remained quiet, his words from earlier swirled in her head like a song on the radio.
He had called himself her boyfriend.
She nearly cringed at the revelation, the term seeming so foreign and so strange when attached to him. Denying that they were close and affectionate would be pointless, but beyond that, they were soulmates, as everyone kept saying. Would "boyfriend" ever begin to compare to that?
The thought would drive her insane if it bounced around her head for any longer.
"Boyfriend?"
Jared stumbled as the word passed by her lips. They stopped walking, and he brought a hand to scratch at the back of his neck.
"What?" He avoided meeting her eyes for a moment.
"You introduced yourself as my boyfriend."
His cheeks flushed slightly, and Nina found herself glad that he was finally being faced with the same embarrassment that she constantly was. In just a moment, though, he regained his composure; perhaps they weren't even just yet.
"Should I have introduced myself as your werewolf boyfriend? Are you upset that I left that part out?"
Nina narrowed her eyes at him and he chuckled.
"Ohh," he nodded, pointing a playful finger in her direction as they began to walk once more, "you wanted me to introduce yourself as your imprint-er, right? We could've had a big family sit-down and explain exactly what that meant, too."
"Maybe we should've," Nina cocked her head to the side, nodding, "my mom and I could've seen you as a wolf for the first time together!" She faked excitement, raising her pitch as she clapped her hands together enthusiastically.
Jared rolled his eyes, pulling her hands apart from one another and lacing his fingers through her own as he laughed.
"Maybe next time."
They parted as they reached Emily's front porch, Jared leaving for his patrol as Nina welcomed herself into the familiar cabin.
Emily was wandering about in her pajamas still, sipping on a cup of tea as she lit incense around the house. She smiled as Nina entered, blowing out the match in her hand. They spoke casually over toast and butter before Emily left the room to shower and Nina began her work in the spare bedroom.
She settled herself at the computer desk, unpacking her camera from her backpack and retrieving the memory card. Her blog had received some attention- more than she had anticipated- and her photos had been adding up.
At some point, Emily returned as she worked, peering over her shoulder and murmuring words of praise. Nina felt a blush creeping up her cheeks, her chest growing hot with appreciation. Emily squeezed at her shoulder gently before slipping back out the door and making her way back into the main area of the house.
It wasn't long before Nina joined her back in the living room, finding her seated on the floor and twiddling at something in her lap.
Emily looked over her shoulder with a breathy smile, holding up a patch of leather and beckoning Nina to join her on the rug,
"It's leather carving," Emily explained, gesturing to the tools in front of her. Nina watched as Emily worked throughout the day, conveniently enough carving a jagged wolf into the leather in front of her.
She wished Kim would get to know Emily's kindness, and she wished, more than anything, that she would get to understand why things happened like they did. The very thought of Kim never knowing and never forgiving her struck her like a slap each time it crossed her mind- which was frequently as she laughed and talked with Emily all day long.
By the time that dinner was over and it was time for Jared to walk her home, she had thought herself into a state of melancholy. He swung their hands between them casually, his heat allowing her to forget that it was nearly Christmas time. Her eyes wandered from one set of Christmas lights to the next as they strolled along the empty streets of La Push.
"I'm sorry about Kim."
It was like he knew every thought that danced through her head. His voice was much quieter than normal, a deep sincerity in it bringing a flash of heat to Nina's chest. She nodded slowly.
"I wish I could do something to help, but…" his voice trailed away, and Nina had felt exactly as he had when she couldn't give Kim a real reason either.
"We can't do anything about it," Nina shrugged slightly, shaking her head, "it is how it is, I guess." They reached her driveway, never missing a beat as he walked with her right up the front steps. Nina inwardly chuckled at the irony of it.
A smile snaked its way onto Jared's face, and his eyes danced with something familiar as he spoke.
"Excited for tomorrow?"
Nina's cheeks flushed, and she forcefully smiled, clenching her teeth for just a moment before chuckling nervously, "Maybe."
"They're going to love you! How could they not?"
She raised her eyebrows and shrugged, pursing her lips.
"Just trust me," he flashed one more smile down at her before pulling her against his chest, pressing his lips down on the top of her head and inhaling.
That night, Nina dreamt of Kim. She tossed and turned as each dream turned dark, Kim's hurt and betrayal rearing its ugly head by the end of each scene. Despite the small excitement she had felt at the prospect of meeting Jared's parents the following morning for brunch, Kim was all that her subconscious could focus on through the night.