Chapter 134: Set Back

Zak's Point of View

My entire body was tense as I sat there, gripping Alicia's hand with both of my own, and I watched her face for any signs that she might be waking up.

I don't think I had ever felt worse in my entire life. I was going through so many emotions at once, that they all blurred together in one, unbearable, agony.

I was angry that I hadn't insisted on coming back to the hotel with Alicia, or that I hadn't just taken her back myself. Even though I knew it was an accident, I blamed Officer Shaw for what had happened. Part of me couldn't help but think, despite how horrible the thought was, 'why couldn't this have happened to her, instead of Alicia?'

I was scared of what was going to happen. Would Alicia ever wake up? If she did, would she have any kind of lasting brain damage? What if she died? And probably even more worse…what if she didn't wake up, what would she have wanted, if she knew this situation was coming. Would she want to be like this for as long as possible, in case she woke up? Or would she want the decision to be made to have her taken off life support. I knew Cheryl was her next of kin, thanks to Aaron notifying me of it earlier, but I hoped I would have a say. Or maybe Cheryl would just leave the decision up to me. Would I have to decide whether to leave my girlfriend on life support, or to take her off it…?

The mere thought made me feel sick.

I felt helpless, sitting here watching Alicia just lying there, with all these machines hooked up to her. I was so used to being in control of everything because of "Ghost Adventures", now that I had no control at all, it was absolutely maddening.

I kept shifting in my seat, unable to get comfortable, nor sit still. After a period of time, I got so frustrated I had to stand up, reluctantly letting go of Alicia's hand, and paced around her hospital room. I was so restless and agitated, I didn't know what to do with myself.

My thoughts drifted back to the moment Dr. Hamza had entered the waiting room to update me with Alicia's test results…

"How is she?" I asked softly, as Aaron finally returned from outside, where he had been talking on the phone to Cheryl. He must have been on the phone with her for nearly an hour.

"Awful," Aaron said, sighing sadly as he sat down next to me. "She wants to be here so bad, but she knows it'll take time to get here. She's terrified she won't get to see Ali, if…" Aaron started, but then cut himself off.

I knew what he was going to say. What if Cheryl didn't get to see Alicia one last time before she passed away.

I shook my head slightly.

"I get it…I understand," I said softly, understanding, but not wanting to dwell on the topic. "What is she going to do?" I asked.

"I managed to convince her to at least wait until we find out Alicia's test results, and go from there," Aaron said. "She's not entirely happy with it, but she understands it's probably the best option for now," Aaron explained.

"Yeah, I think so too," I replied. "Mom offered to fly out right away, but I said we might as well wait and see how serious Alicia's injuries are," I explained.

"All we can do for now, bro," Aaron said, and I nodded in response. "While I was outside, I called Billy and informed him of the latest," Aaron added.

"Oh man, thanks bro, I didn't even think-" I began, but Aaron cut me off.

"It's okay, they understand. They're finished with the police department for now, unless anything new surfaces. They were just finishing gathering up the gear, and then they were going to head back to the hotel to drop it off, and then come here," Aaron explained.

"Good to hear, but if you're talking to them again, tell them they don't have to come if they're tired," I replied.

"They know dude, but they want to be here," Aaron started. "They're worried about her too," Aaron added, as he gently rubbed my shoulder, and I smiled a bit.

I really have great friends, the best anyone could ask for. I need to show them how much I appreciated them more often…I thought.

"Mr. Bagans?" Dr. Hamza's voice suddenly said, and I looked up to see him walking toward us.

"Dr. Hamza-" I started, while beginning to stand up, but he motioned for me to sit back down.

Oh no…

I forced myself not to go into panic mode as I sat back down, but couldn't stop myself from tensing up as Dr. Hamza sat down across from me.

"So, as I mentioned to you earlier, we performed a CT Scan and an MRI on Miss Wilde," Dr. Hamza started, and I nodded in response. "The good news, is that Miss Wilde doesn't have any further injuries," Dr. Hamza added.

"That's good…what's the bad news…?" I asked nervously.

"Well, while it's certainly not the worst case scenario, it's still very concerning. Because Miss Wilde was conscious for a brief period before losing consciousness, that tells us she suffered an epidural bleed, which is bleeding around the brain," Dr. Hamza started. "Epidural bleeds can be caused by injuries to various parts of the brain. In Miss Wilde's case, she suffered a small skull fracture, which caused a tear in her dural venous sinus," Dr. Hamza added.

Dur…what?

"Okay, what does that mean?" I asked softly.

"I apologize, I'll try not to get into all the medical jargon," Dr. Hamza started, looking slightly apologetic. I could tell he was passionate about his job, which I could relate too. "The dural venous sinus are essentially channels inside certain parts of the brain, that allow blood and fluid to travel to other parts of the brain. The skull fracture caused a laceration to one of the venous channels, thus, blood is leaking into an area between the protective layer of her brian and her skull. " Dr. Hamza explained.

His explanation made sense, but what did it mean?

"So, what does this mean for her?" I asked softly.

"There are several possibilities," Dr. Hamza started. "The accumulation of blood puts pressure on the brain, and can cause the brain to swell. If the brain continues to swell, the brain may actually shift inside the skull. Pressure on certain brain tissues can affect vision, speech, mobility, and consciousness. In severe cases, epidural hematoma's can cause lasting brain damage, or even death if the pressure becomes too much," Dr. Hamza explained.

I felt like I had all the air sucked out of me, and started to feel light headed. I was actually glad now that Dr. Hamza had insisted on us sitting down. I rubbed my forehead and tried to calm my breathing.

"I apologize for alarming you, but you should be aware of the risks. For now, Miss Wilde is stable. We are going to monitor her over the next several hours. We've also started her on medication to try to reduce the inflammation and intracranial pressure," Dr. Hamza said.

I waved a hand to indicate it was fine about him alarming me. I did need to know all the possibilities, no matter how much I might not want to hear them.

"What happens if she gets worse?" I asked softly.

"We would have to take her into surgery right away to perform a craniotomy. In a craniotomy, we a drill hole, or sometimes several, into the skull. In some cases, we cut a small opening in the skull. In both procedures, we use suction to remove the excess blood, which will help to reduce the pressure. We will also repair the site of the tear to stop the bleeding," Dr. Hamza said.

Drilling holes into her skull?! I thought in shocked.

"Alright…" I said softly, unsure of how else to respond to such news.

"I know this is a lot to take in. And while Miss Wilde isn't out of the woods yet, she's stable for now, and that's a good thing," Dr. Hamza said.

"Alright," I said softly. "Can I see her?" I asked.

"Of course, I'll take you to her. Although I must insist that she only have one visitor at a time," Dr. Hamza said, glancing at Aaron.

"It's okay bro," Aaron said, looking at me. "I'll call Cheryl to update her. Do you want me to call your mom for you?" Aaron added.

I nodded in acknowledgement, and gratitude.

"That would be great, thanks Aaron," I replied.

"No worries," Aaron said, and then stood up and began heading toward the emergency entrance.

"This way Mr. Bagans," Dr. Hamza said, as he stood up and motioned for me to follow.

I stood up, and then began following Dr. Hamza through the maze of hallways within the Emergency department. Everything was moving at a blur.

Alicia had to recover from this, she just had too…

I suddenly snapped back to the present when I heard several machines start beeping loudly, and rapidly. I stood by Alicia's bedside, looking at all of them in a quick succession, trying to figure out what was happening. Just as I was about to call for help, a nurse ran in while pulling medical gloves on, and what she called out made me feel like my heart had stopped.

"Colour Code Blue! 32-13!" The nurse called out, as she pushed passed me, quickly climbed up on the bed and straddled over Alicia's hips, and began doing compressions on her chest.

I knew what that code meant…it was the hospital's code for cardiac arrest, followed by her room number. Alicia's heart had just stopped…

"Code Blue! 32-13!" A voice called over the PA for other nearby doctors and nurses to hear. "Code Blue! 32-13!" The voice called again.

I stared in shock as the nurse continued compressions, and then Dr. Hamza and a second nurse ran into the room.

"She's in full code! Still in V fib!" The nurse doing the compressions stated, while the second nurse gently, but forcefully, moved me back further away from the hospital bed.

"Alright, we need to shock her," Dr. Hamza said, as he turned and quickly charged up a defibrillator. "Five milligram of Epi," Dr. Hamza ordered, and the second nurse quickly grabbed a small glass bottle of some type of liquid from a nearby cart, put some in a syringe, and injected it into the port of Alicia's IV.

Meanwhile, Dr. Hamza finished charging up the defibrillator, and picked up the two paddles and moved closer to the bed, while the nurse doing compressions quickly hoped off the bed. She then pulled down Alicia's medical gown to expose her chest, and put two sticky pads on the skin of her chest.

"Clear?" Dr. Hamza called.

"Clear!" Both nurses replied, holding their hands up.

I actually jumped as I watched Dr. Hamza put the paddles down on top of the pads on Alicia's chest, pressed buttons on the paddles, and Alicia's body arched up off the bed as her system was shocked.

I didn't want to watch this happening to her, but I was frozen in place.

"Rhythm is still in V Fib, going to go again," Dr. Hamza said as he turned back to the defibrillator, adjusted some setting on it, and then turned back to Alicia. "Clear?!" He asked.

"Clear!" Both nurses replied again.

"Come on Ali…come back to me…" I said quietly, as Dr. Hamza once again shocked her system with the paddles.

And just like that, the machine monitoring Alicia's heart began beeping at what sounded like a normal rate.

"She's back in normal sinus rhythm," one of the nurses said, as Dr. Hamza returned the paddles to their place on the defibrillator cart, and began checking on Alicia's status on the other machines.

"Her ICP is through the roof," Dr. Hamza said, as he held up each of Alicia's upper eyelids, one at a time, and flicked a flashlight over her eye. "She needs a craniotomy now," Dr. Hamza added.

No…

"Surgery?! But you said she was stable!" I exclaimed, in panic mode.

As the nurses prepared to be able to wheel Alicia to surgery, Dr. Hamza turned to me.

"She was Mr. Bagans, but unfortunately her ICP, or Intracranial pressure has gone up significantly. If we don't reduce the pressure on her brain, she will die," Dr. Hamza said.

I nodded, despite the immense fear I was feeling. It's not like I had a choice in the matter.

"Ready to go doctor," one of the nurses said.

"I'll come find you in the waiting room once the surgery is over," Dr. Hamza said, then, with the help of the nurses, he wheeled Alicia's bed out of the room, and out of my sight.

I immediately gasped for air, feeling like I had been holding my breath for the entire time since the machines had started beeping, and managed to get myself seated in the chair I had been sitting in earlier.

What if that's the last memory I have of her alive…?

I leaned forward and held my face in my hands, and as everything hit me at once, I couldn't stop the tears from flowing down my face.