Rise from the Ashes Chapter 11: Nightmares & Daydreams

When he closed his eyes he was well aware of the unpleasantness that would undoubtedly await him.

When he had the chance, the Avatar would seek to grant himself peace of mind through the art of meditation. He had always been fond of these exercises as a boy. Technically he was still a child, but that now felt like an eternity ago.

Focusing inward usually allowed oneself to tune out the outside world no matter how tumultuous it was. But meditation only went so far. Eventually, he would need to sleep, but in sleep there was no peace to be found. Not since the comet, perhaps not again for a long while.

It was as constant as the rising and setting of the sun, almost like it was a predestined vision sent to torment and punish him for his failures. Aang had accepted that this constant uneasiness was the new way of things. Surely his own mind could not be so threatening? However, his acceptance did not make his nights any more pleasant. The circumstances of the dreams would change with each night, but they all carried a feeling of overwhelming anxiety. Over the last year he had endured experiences that tested his youthful optimism and tempted him to adapt and change in order to survive the world's dire situation.

It was taking its toll. His friends noticed it of course, but his conscious choice to end the life of the Fire Nation Admiral made him feel lost. They could sympathize and support him, but they could not truly empathize. They had not lived a monastic lifestyle. They had not dedicated their lives to the Air Nomad philosophy and way of life. Aang had grown up believing that all life was sacred, and yet he had taken a life. He had taken it out of necessity, but he was now a killer at the age of thirteen.

Was I simply naïve? He could not stop himself thinking. Was I wrong in believing in the best of people.

The Air Nomads were gone, but he as the last airbender had kept their culture and way of life alive. However, now that he was heading towards a darker destiny, he felt that he was well and truly leaving his former life behind.

And that the influence of the Air Nomads had now truly left the world.

He would have given up anything to just be a normal kid, but the duty to bring balance to the world had fallen to him whether he wished it or not.

And I will swallow my pride and desires. I will do anything….anything that is necessary to see my duty to the world fulfilled. Fire Lord Ozai will pay his dues a thousand fold and his imperialist beliefs will need to be dismantled and discredited. It would not be acceptable simply to remove the head of the nation and have another immediately take its place.

It…saddened him that he could not think of a better way.

These were the thoughts that plagued Avatar Aang throughout the day, and his nights were even worse.

His friends were unfortunately a common theme in his dreams. One night he saw Katara burned just as she had been during the invasion. Another night he lost her. Other nights he lost Sokka and Toph and it felt so very real in that moment. Most times it was some unidentifiable assailant that took them, but other times it was he himself who struck them when his power was unrestrained and wild.

Tonight's nightmare was particularly bad. The ice caps beneath his feet were melting away, he saw the great wall of ice at the Northern Water Tribe crumble into the waves below. Thousands of acres of land and fields in the Earth Kingdom were set ablaze and the very ground cracked open. Humans and spirits alike wailed in distress and anger. He heard the shrieks of hundreds, as babies were taken from their parents' arms until all was silent and everything that he had ever known turned into a mountain of ash.

The ash continued to pile up until it became as deep and vast as an ocean and he was drowning in it. The dream seemed lucid and he felt like coughing and choking. Hot embers filled his mouth and covered every inch of his skin.

It wasn't enough to wake him and eventually he felt that he had found his way out of the mound of ash and reached its summit. Instead of freedom he found a giant form in the distance slowly approaching towards him.

Aang had seen propaganda posters when he had traveled through territory controlled by the Fire Nation, so he had seen what Fire Lord Ozai looked like. This figure shared the Fire Lord's face but had the body of a great dragon armoured in dark black scales. Steam came out of the nostrils of his human face and when he opened his mouth fire burst forth and enveloped the area.

Despite the disorienting nature of the nightmare. Aang held his ground.

I do not fear this beast.

The vision of the Fire Lord coiled his dragon-like form around the Avatar as if to crush him. But the boy still was not afraid.

Then in a moment the dragon was gone, the figment of his imagination dissolved in an instant.

But another figure took its place. The figure was far smaller than the dragon, but Aang felt far more anxiety when faced with this humanoid figure. The dragon had felt like some fantastical exaggeration, but this figure felt real.

The figure was female wearing black body armor with sharp edges at her shoulders. No older than fourteen she walked towards him slowly with unwavering arrogance. Her long, groomed black hair was loose and fell past her shoulders. Her amber colored eyes were fierce and she had long, sharp fingernails that looked like they could draw blood at the slightest touch.

Aang had spoken with Katara regarding the circumstances of his supposed death, as the deceased admiral had claimed that Prince Zuko had been the one who had struck Aang down.

"I don't know why he would make that claim." Katara had told him. "That backstabbing jerk put us in a bind. But he along with all the others in the catacomb were mesmerized when you were transforming. All of them except for the girl. She is the one who attacked you.

I do not fear you either.

But the girl did not vanish like the dragon had, instead she extended her fingers as if to caress his face. Then she began to holler with booming laughter and lightning flashed from her fingertips.

He didn't even try to go back to sleep after such an abrupt awakening. It was the middle of the night and it was bitterly cold but he found himself wandering about in the dark.

The Avatar found himself on the shoreline where he could make out the outlines of the battleships that Toph had wrecked. He looked beyond them towards the open waters. He had fallen under those waves and had been frozen for a hundred years. When he emerged he had set out with his friends on an unforgettable adventure. Now a short time ago he had been struck dead by the Princess of the Fire Nation, and yet again against all odds he had been given another chance to correct his mistakes.

I'll be leaving the same place again on a new adventure, but I will not fail this time. I will master my own emotions, I will master all forms of bending, I will master the Avatar state, I will be a reliable defender of the defenseless, I will learn when to extend an open hand and when to use a closed fist.

I will end this era of oppression.

It was there at the edge of the water, at the crack of dawn, that Katara found him.

"You have been here all night, haven't you?" She said in a sad, disappointed voice. "Bad dreams?"

"Dreams eventually pass with time." Aang responded, not yet looking at her.

"Don't downplay them to me, Aang, you are clearly hurting."

He turned towards her and Katara realized that words were not going to be enough. She embraced him and held him close.

Aang was initially startled, but quickly recovered and returned the gesture. His heart began to beat faster than usual. They held each other for a long time, as long as they needed. These minutes of comfort vanquished the anxieties the two had for that short time.

After a while Aang whispered softly. "I will have to leave soon, by now the Fire Lord likely knows that I am alive. I will be his only target. I have to make my presence known somewhere else a good distance away so that his fleet does not come here. If I remain here too long, everyone here will be in danger and our defense a week ago will have meant nothing."

"I know." Katara responded. "Dad is doing well, and our journey is far from over. I will be with you every step of the way."

"Every step?" The Avatar responded. "No matter who we may face and what we may have to do? The lengths we may have to take?"

Katara caught the meaning. "They killed you Aang. That monster of a girl killed my friend and I watched you fall. They killed my mother and damn near killed my father. I will defend those that I care for by whatever means that are necessary. I don't want to, but if there isn't another option then I will."

The Avatar finally let go of her and sighed. "There is a saying that I had always disagreed with in the past. An eye for an eye. A life for a life. What punishment is befitting the Fire Lord for what he and his predecessors have done? Mediation and diplomacy? Of course I would prefer them, Katara. I would give anything to be able to use them now. I was taught by the monks that they were the only options. But they are just not viable now. When your father sailed away with the rest of the tribe, did he go to negotiate with the Fire Nation? No, he did not because he knew that at this juncture it would have been in vain. Instead he did the only thing that he could do. He stood up for those who depended on him. I will do the same."

"Let us shoulder some of that burden. It's too much for one man alone, even an Avatar." Katara replied.

She paused for a moment before adding, with an edge of steel in her voice "As for who we may face, I must admit that I cannot wait to see the Prince and Princess again. I have some words for them, and some bending techniques that I cannot wait to demonstrate."

Ty-Lee always wore her emotions and feelings on her sleeve. Her warm, outgoing, bubbly personality was as much of a staple to her person as her chi-blocking and athletic abilities. She liked to talk, and she liked to encourage others to express themselves.

I am such a poor fit for keeping secrets. Especially from her. It's like a turtle-duck going up against a dragon.

Princess Azula had not arrived back at the capital until four days after Zuko and Mai had fled, and Azula had spent the entirety of her first day back meeting with the Fire Lord in the throne room. Ty-Lee stayed as far away from the throne room and the Fire Lord as possible. That had been true going back all the way to when she was a child. The Fire Lord's aura was as dark as a bottomless pit. Even when she had played with Azula when they were children it was always Azula's mother that Ty-Lee had interacted with, not the future Fire Lord. For that she was extremely grateful.

Part of her, a very foolish part, wanted to go with Zuko and Mai on this perilous quest they had chosen to undertake. Another part, equally foolish, wanted to drop everything and get out of the capital and never look back. Perhaps find some circus to perform in very far away, or go completely dark. She was not oblivious, something was brewing here and Ty-Lee did not like it one bit.

Running away was an unrealistic fantasy, and a dangerous one. But danger had been present no matter what choice she made. She had received orders from Azula to keep an eye on Zuko and Mai. Their absence was a direct violation of the order that she had been given.

Failing orders given by royalty…usually does not end well.

Ty-Lee had been friends with Azula since childhood. Sure she had been bossed around and picked on occasionally but never once had Ty-Lee thought that their bond was not genuine. Azula had several sycophantic followers politically, but few actual friends.

That was the real reason Ty-Lee had not left. Losing both Ty-Lee and Mai on a single night would have been very upsetting for the young princess.

That princess was now approaching her, Ty-Lee had received a summons from a Dai Li agent at the palace. It was unknown to the acrobat what exactly these Dai Li did at the palace. Azula had earned their respect while technically being in captivity in Ba Sing Se and they allegedly answered to her directly. It was peculiar why they were here in the capital. They were not bodyguards to the princess, as they had not traveled with her to the North Pole. It was way above Ty-Lee's station to know Azula's purpose for these foreign allies.

Azula wished to meet her in the palace gardens where they had spent so much time as children. It was where Ty-Lee had practiced her handstands and backflips countless times, the source of many good memories. It was far and away her favorite area of the palace. All the gold, masterpiece paintings, and elaborate architecture could not compare to the wide open areas, calming running water, sunlight, and beautiful flowers from across the nation that the garden provided.

Azula had a smile on her face as she approached, not necessarily a good thing given the circumstance. It was easy to forget that Azula was only fourteen years old. She always felt larger somehow. Regardless, Ty-Lee had never feared Azula, except for when she had paid the circus a visit and 'enhanced' the performance. She felt that way now.

"Ty-Lee, I am quite glad to see you. When I learned that my dear brother and now Mai were nowhere to be found, I feared you would be gone as well." Azula raised an eyebrow. "You do not look like your normal cheerful self. Is something the matter? Are you well?"

Azula's polite tone had its intended effect.

I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. I would rather have her rebuke me straight away.

"I didn't want to upset you with a smile 'Zula. I have heard the commotion around the palace. All sorts of rumors are going around. Zuko and Mai are gone. I didn't want to upset you by seeming disrespectful."

Azula took a step forward, closing the distance between them considerably.

I feel trapped.

"You do not have to hide your feelings from me. It does not suit you. You are guarded, and are acting like I am about to swallow you whole." The Princess laughed and Ty-Lee forced herself to laugh along as well.

"I suppose it is understandable. You did fail me quite spectacularly. I went out to conquer a nation and how am I welcomed back? Our trio is cut to two. Dumb-Dumb is gone as well." Azula did not break her pleasant smile.

Ty-Lee tried to respond but she could not offer up any words at all, which led to a very awkward pause.

Azula sighed dramatically, finally breaking her smirk. "Oh well. I have to think positively. You are always telling me that. Life is full of little disappointments, I should not let some missteps get in my way, especially when the future is so exciting!"

"Zula I…"

"Come on, walk with me.." Azula interjected firmly. The fire lilies are coming in nicely, I know they are your favorites."

Stunned, Ty-Lee let herself be led around the garden by the Princess. Azula would bring up seemingly innocuous conversation topics that only served to make the acrobat even more nervous.

Finally they stopped at a fountain.

"Such a good memory." Azula said wistfully. "It was so rare to get him to play with us. Surely you remember?"

"Of c-course I remember. Mai was so embarrassed after Zuko landed on her in that fountain."

"I was such a devious matchmaker. I think they really do owe their budding relationship to me." Azula snickered. "They looked so cute together. I bet they are enjoying their honeymoon right now. They better be. It had better be worth it living the lives of fugitives."

Ty-Lee could not take being strung along anymore.

"Azula I'm sorry!" She blurted out.

Silence. Dead silence. The two girls simply looked at each other.

"Are you?" The Princess said eventually, after the silence had become unbearable.

Ty-Lee subconsciously took a step backward. Two short simple words, but the way Azula said them was absolutely terrifying. It was not the sweet voice of a fourteen year old girl that she had been using mere seconds ago. It was the voice of the Princess of the Fire Nation that had brought down Ba Sing Se from the inside. A feat that no one had accomplished before her. She had overseen the destruction of the Northern Water Tribe and had struck the Avatar dead. A firebending prodigy. The second most powerful person in the entire nation. That person was now bearing down on her. There were times when the acrobat could forget that her friend wielded such power. This moment was an unmistakable reminder.

"I am sorry Azula. I am well and truly sorry." She could say that convincingly. It was the truth. She didn't want Mai and Zuko to run. But she couldn't find it in herself to stop them.

"I can see my brother tricking a few dumb guards, but how exactly did he slip your notice?"

Ty-Lee's voice trembled. "Please forgive me Azula, Zuko can move faster than I thought possible. It was surreal. He stuck to the shadows in the dead of night and he seemed to know every nook and cranny of this place, he didn't want to be seen and I couldn't keep up, I followed a wrong path and by the time I corrected it the both of them were gone. I am so sorry."

Azula gave an exasperated sigh. "Some things never change. It's truly a wonder you were able to maintain your cover in Ba Sing Se. You are such a bad liar."

Ty-Lee chastised herself internally. I didn't expect to get away with this, but wow did this go badly.

"Don't be surprised." The princess regained her smirk. "Your body language is practically screaming to me that you are lying. Just who would I be, if a person's true intentions were not known to me?"

Now I am walking on very thin ice.

"My int..intention…" She mentally slapped herself for stuttering.

"You let them go." Azula interrupted. Let's stop this charade if you please. It could grow tiresome if you are committed to maintaining it. Take it as a lesson. Don't try to mislead me. Never again." The diction on the final words were sharp, as if the princess was carving the message into the acrobat's brain.

All that worrying for nearly a week only for 'Zula to see through the fable in moments. Deep down I knew this would happen.

"Ty-Lee you have many traits, unless I am asking you to lie, incompetence is not one of them. You did not lose sight of them." Azula replied casually, as if she was explaining the most basic of facts to a child.

"'Zula, I think you might overestimate me."

"You are not a fool. Do you take me for one?" There was an edge in the princess' voice that was alarming. She sounded as if she had taken offense.

"Of course not Azula. I know of your cleverness better than most." She tried to keep her voice from wavering.

"That's good…and also interesting. You knew you would fail to deceive me and yet stayed here like a good girl." Azula stared at her childhood friend with a gaze that made Ty-Lee incredibly uneasy. "Why?" The princess asked.

"Because we are friends."

For the briefest of moments it was Azula who looked taken aback. But she recovered quickly and closed the distance between them. Ty-Lee felt her heart begin to race.

"That we are." The princess confirmed. "And Mai is your friend as well. Can you satisfy two friends at once?"

Ty-Lee did not want to answer that question, fortunately Azula gave her an out.

The princess let out a playful chuckle. "Calm down Ty-Lee. I'm just toying with you. I know you have a kind heart. I also know that in the future, you will keep faith with me."

Ty-Lee gave a tense nervous chuckle in response.

"If anything I should thank you, my dear friend. I owe you a debt, and I pay back my debts ten-fold."

Wait…Is she…glad that Zuko is gone? She had no issue bringing him back from Ba Sing Se, she never saw him as a threat to her inheritance. Why would she be happy that her brother has ostracized himself entirely. Does she loathe him, or simply want him out of her life? If so, why would she tell me to keep an eye on him?

"I'm…glad you are pleased 'Zula."

"Stop acting so tense, Ty-Lee. I never thought I would miss your bubbly personality so badly. You can relax. I wish the lovebirds well on their excursion. I hope they find long life and happiness. I can hope for nieces and nephews some day. So lighten up. I believe that all will go well, and once it does, the four of us will be together again and laugh about this someday. That can be our little goal. You will keep that aspiration between us? As friends?"

What is she going to do about her father if that is true? I doubt he shares these desires for a traitor.

"Of course 'Zula, I would like nothing more."

If anyone else would have failed Azula like this she would be finished with them…But…I am her friend. Aside from Mai maybe her only friend. For all her threatening posturing, just like I could not abandon her, she could not let me go.

A/N

Finally I got this complete. I labored on this one a bit in order to hit the right tone.

Through others' POV I want Azula to come across as intimidating while also alluding to her underlying internal conflict and humanity.

There is an element of manipulation, but also genuine friendship which is proven when Azula completely comes apart after Mai and Ty-Lee turn on her in canon.

Its been fun building up these characters in this scenario before sending them on a collision course with each other.

I get busy for stretches of time, but it is very cathartic to write this for fun and I am glad others can enjoy it as well. I always enjoy the feedback you offer, so thank you and I hope I can continue to deliver a positive experience for you.