Hey, hey everyone. Surprisingly, despite how angsty I usually write, the angst in this chapter was pretty hard to write so I apologize in advance. Trigger warnings for this chapter are themes of death and loss/ anger and despair, the presence of and urn/ashes of a cremated individual, and mentions of mentions of abandonment. I believe that should just about cover it but as per usual, if you find a trigger I forgot don't hesitate to inform me so I can add it to this list. Thank you all for sticking around with this story despite the infrequent update schedule. As always take care of yourselves and thank you for reading!

Roman pulled at the long sleeves of his black turtleneck, messing with the buttons running from the collar to the wrist on the left hand side. Just the sweater, a nice pair of black dress slacks and formal shoes he'd borrowed from Remus didn't seem quite formal enough for a funeral like this, even if it was already going to be rather informal already. He knew most of the others were wearing suits, however he couldn't fit into Remus's spare black suit correctly and Janus didn't have time to get him one. Remus said he was plenty formal, but he was still worried. Remus said a lot of things that aren't necessarily true.

The building tension in his gut suddenly vanished as a series of loud thuds rang off to his side.

"Haha, oops?"

Roman looked over concernedly to find his twin sprawled out at the base of the stairs.

"Jesus Christ don't freaking kill yourself," Roman exclaimed in exasperation.

"Aww, but death is fun. You should try it," Remus smirked.

"No, nope, we are not telling people to kill themselves today," Janus called from somewhere in the living room at the top of the stairs.

"Only a small death, not a real one. It's no fun if you don't get to enjoy it after the fact," Remus replied.

"What does that even mean?" Roman asked, giving Remus his hand to help him up.

"That's for me to know," Remus grinned brightly.

"I'm certain he knows himself," Janus sighed, finally descending down the stairs to join them.

"I heard a crash, are you kiddos all okay?" Patton asked, slipping out of his room down the hall, fiddling with the buttons of his suit.

"Remus was telling people to kill themselves," Virgil called from where he was now crouching at the tops of the steps watching the scene unfold.

"W-what? Kiddo no! Bad! We do not condone death in this household," Patton scolded.

"Aww but Daddy," Remus whined.

"No, we are not going there," Janus cut him off, slightly bopping him in the back of the head.

"Do I even wish to inquire what has been transpiring down there?" Logan asked, appearing beside Virgil at the top of the stairs.

"Definitely not," Janus called back to him with an exhausted sigh.

"I presume you're all ready to leave?" Logan asked, nudging his way past Virgil to descend the stairs.

"Do we need to take more than one car? Sir Janus's car only fits five and there are… a lot of us," Roman hummed, glancing around at everyone as his lips pressed into a firm line.

"I have a seven passenger car as well," Janus said, taking a pair of keys out of his pocket.

"If we get any more members to this family we'll need a whole ass bus," Remus chirped.

"That's actually not an over exaggeration at this point," Virgil pointed out.

"Sorry," Roman mumbled, looking down again.

"Stop apologizing kiddo, we all want you here and we already had the resources here for you, you aren't troubling us in any way," Patton insisted gently.

Roman offered him a half smile of appreciation before turning back towards Janus.

"Regardless of any future travel issues we might face, Logan is quite correct, we will be late if we don't get on the road. Are you alright to go now?" Janus asked, his eyes flicking over towards Roman to direct the question mostly towards him.

Instead of verbally responding he gave a small awkward nod in response. Remus thumped a heavy arm over Roman shoulder, dragging him closer.

"You stink," Roman teased in a falsified grumble.

"I smell deliciously of attic must, I don't know what you are talking about," Remus replied.

"You're a ridiculous human," Roman replied.

"Is he even a human?" Virgil smirked as he walked past them.

"Well he certainly isn't an otter that's for sure," Patton joked.

"It isn't a question, he is clearly a homosapien," Logan reasoned with a raised brow.

"I mean he could be a demon. Just putting that out there," Virgil shrugged as they all followed Janus out to the garage.

"I take absolutely no offense to that statement," Remus replied.

"Of course you don't," Janus said, unlocking his car without bothering to even spare a glance at the rowdy horde of omegas.

"So, um, where do I sit?" Roman asked.

"In a seat," Remus replied without missing a beat.

"My aren't you helpful," Roman frowned.

"I try."

"You can sit wherever you are comfortable, we don't have assigned seating, although I presume you'd likely be most comfortable beside Remus?" Logan assumed.

"Debatable."

"But you love me!"

"... I guess, slightly. You've been pushing it," Roman smirked.

"How dare. I just got my bestest twinzie back and he doesn't adore me. I'll just go sulk in the back of the car. All alone. While you're with the ones you love. It's fine. I'm fine."

"You're not a good actor," Roman said with a slight playful raise of his brow.

"I'm the best actor," Remus argued as he crawled into the back of the van.

"Mhm, yeah, now move over drama queen," Roman hummed as he nudged Remus into the furthest seat so he could take his own seat beside him.

Roman strapped himself into his seat in the back row of the car taking note of the other passengers of the car. In the row in front of him Virgil had situated himself in his seat and was beginning to lean against Patton's side, the white furred omega comfortably soothing down his hair once he'd strapped himself in. At the very front of the car Janus was starting the car and backing out of the now open garage while Logan was fixing the GPS to take them to the unfamiliar location.

Roman turned to look out the window, his chin resting against his propped up arm, watching the landscape and houses quickly zooming by.

"You've gone dark again. Everything alright?" Remus murmured worriedly.

"Just doesn't feel real," Roman mumbled out in response, not removing his gaze from the window.

Remus let a slightly worried sound similar to a whine as he laced his fingers into Roman's. Roman gave a gentle squeeze of appreciation but didn't make any further move to continue the conversation. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel at the moment. All he felt was empty, unable to process or comprehend what this funeral actually meant and was going to be like.

What was slightly over a thirty minute drive felt like seconds as Roman stared out at the world in a daze, sinking deeply into the back of his own mind.

"Ready to go, Ro?" Remus asked as the car pulled into a parked position.

"Yeah, 'course I am," Roman replied, his voice barely coming out a whisper as he reluctantly got up and slipped out of the car.

He stared up blankly at the tall spires of the church they'd arrived at. He'd never been to one before, one or two of the others from his old home had for wedding events and such, but never him. He cursed his luck that the way his curiosity over what the inside of one would look like was only being satisfied due to the death of his daughter. Fate certainly was a cruel thing.

He fiddled with his buttons again as he followed the group inside again, into the grand building trusting the head of the group, Janus, knew which way he was going. They made their way to another large room filled with rows of benches and large stained glass windows. At the front of the room was a little display of flowers surrounding an urn right near a podium where a man in religious attire stood waiting for them. They seated themselves amongst the first two rows and the man addressed them asking if this was the entire party that would be joining them today. Roman continued to zone off looking at the scenes the windows displayed, focussing anywhere but the urn.

"First and foremost I wish to share my condolences to the family of the deceased. It does seem so unjust that the lord sometimes takes away our children before they've gotten the chance to walk upon this earth," the man began.

Family. Roman was the only family here. He supposed Remus was her uncle, but even he didn't know she existed until after she was already gone. Her other father wasn't here. He knew Roman was pregnant, he knew about his daughter. He'd still done nothing to protect Roman, to save his child. He didn't even know Bella was dead. For that matter he didn't even know if Roman was alright or even alive. Roman wondered if he ever wondered what had become of them, if he had wished for their well being or if he'd just forgotten about them once they were gone.

His fist clenched as his jaw tightened and eyes burned with unshed tears that desperately wanted to well up. He could feel the anger and pain finally pooling in his chest, violently replacing the former numbness. Bella's death may be his fault for not being able to take care of himself and thus Bella, but it was his fault too. Roman had every right to be mad at him. Perhaps not. It was Roman's fault he had gotten pregnant in the first place, he wasn't where he was supposed to have been.

"You doing okay?"

Roman snapped out of his thoughts, letting out a few heavy gasps of surprise. He looked up to meet the gaze of Virgil whom he hadn't even realized was seated beside him.

"I'm fine. Nothing I can't handle," Roman chuckled nervously.

Virgil let out a snort of disbelief as he turned to pretend his full attention was focused on the funeral service.

"It feels like it's been forever and yet not long enough since the last time I was at a funeral," Virgil mused.

"What? You've been to one before? W-who-"

"My mom. 'Bout a year ago now. It was right when I moved in with Janus. It was only me, Janus and Logan that went to that one because the others didn't know me well yet. I was pretty good friends with Logan at the time and you could say Janus was there as a protector at the time," Virgil mused.

"Oh… I'm sorry about your mother," Roman apologized, his brow furrowing sympathetically.

"Me too. She was… the only one that saw me for who I really was, until Janus came around that is. Everyone else just wanted me to fit their mold, you know?" Virgil chuckled wryly. "I love her and I miss her. I get what it's like to lose someone and grieve. It's not the same but, I'm here if you want to talk about it and stuff."

Roman blinked at him in surprise for a stunned moment.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to impose myself and make assumptions, you just were spacey and I thought you could use someone to relate to. I shouldn't be making this about me, it's about your kid and-"

"I appreciate it, Virgil, truely," Roman reassured him with a soft smile, resting a tentative hand on his thigh.

"Heh, no prob Princey- what, shiz, sorry, I didn't mean-"

Roman let out a deep chuckle.

"Three people came to the same name for me all on their own in their own different ways. I suppose that means it really is a suiting name," Roman mused.

"I'm so sorry Roman, I didn't mean to remind you of anything," Virgil apologized again.

"Don't be. I like it when it comes from you," Roman reassured him.

Virgil relaxed and gave his own half smile.

"Well, I meant what I said Princey. I'm here to listen if you need someone to relate to," Virgil said. "Also I'm sorry for attacking you when we first met and stuff."

"I've had omegas literally try to maime me before because I smelled too much like their alpha when they were nearing their first heat after bonding with Master and as the Den Mother I had to deal with them through the entire thing, being shoved is nothing," Roman reassured him.

"Damn," Virgil hummed thoughtfully before actually turning his attention to the service.

Roman joined him in listening into what was going, one hand resting on Virgil's thigh, the other lacing with Remus's as they both inched comfortingly closer to let him know they were there for him.

He found himself trembling the longer the service went on, tears building and threatening to fall. He knew it would be okay to cry but it felt too humiliating to let the silent sobs escape his throat as he was once again roped into the reality of this finalizing moment where he was forced to accept she was gone. No one else was upset or crying, it was just him, he felt so alone despite everyone who was so close to him. Virgil would understand. Remus would cry purely for him if he cried. The other three would most certainly comfort him and yet he didn't want to let any of it out. His eyes finally shifted from service onto the urn focussing on it for the first time. His baby, his little girl. The one thing that gave him the will to survive all of those days. She was gone. There was no escaping it. He lost her before he even had the chance to have her truly in his life.

He didn't hold it back anymore, just silent cries as tears soaked his cheeks. Remus pulled him against his chest, forcing him to look away from the ashes of his daughter. Virgil took Roman's hand and held it gently as he soothed his thumb over his knuckles. He just wanted the service to be over.

The words said were simple. A few prayers and light hearted quips in hopes of brightening the spirit of the weeping omega and the rest of the party but Roman couldn't bring himself to lift the grim feelings clawing inside him that had chosen now to finally surface. He just quivered and did his best to stay quiet and respectful. It was better to stay quiet. With a final prayer that Roman could hardly follow, the service was over and everyone was rising from their seats.

"Roman, it's over now. We can head home immediately if that would make you more comfortable," Janus stated, moving closer to comfort him.

"S-sorry, I should be more appreciative and-"

"Roman, stop thinking about everyone else. You're allowed to cry. This is a funeral. People cry at funerals, especially considering the fact that Bella is your child. You don't need anyone's blessing to exist or feel things," Janus argued insistently.

Roman flinched a bit at the alpha's sharp tone but immediately began lowering his guard again as he saw Janus's instant regret and pain at unintentionally raising his voice at the traumatized individual. He knew Janus meant the best, he was just frustrated with Roman's lack of self worth. He cared, that was more important than a few slightly too impassioned words.

"What Janus was attempting to communicate was that no one here minds you crying, we would have been quite shocked if you hadn't. It's a natural response and a healthy means of coping with emotion," Logan expressed, resting a gentle hand on Roman's shoulder.

"T-thanks," Roman mumbled, grasping at his trembling arms before forcing a smile. "Seems this Disney Prince was the one that needed saving today."

"You've got a good support system with this family of weirdos, Princey," Virgil chuckled with a small upward quirk of his lip.

"That's right kiddo, we're here for you. And we'll show all of the Disney movies we can to make you smile," Patton added, the second half clearly intended as an attempt to break the tension.

Roman nuzzled between the two closest individuals which happened to be Logan and Remus, seeking the affection they willingly gave to him in the form of a embrace, the other three quickly joining the group hug as well. It felt surprisingly nice being the center of attention, he was used to putting everyone else first but now it was him getting the love and praise. Perhaps it was a selfish thought, but he could get used to things being like this.

Eventually the group pulled away and Roman reluctantly looked over at the urn again.

"Are we taking that home with us?" He asked.

"The ashes and the flowers are all yours, Roman. We'll load them into the car and you can put them wherever you please," Janus replied.

"Oh speaking of ashes! Janny, did you bring it?" Remus asked.

Janus fished into his pocket to retrieve a box.

"No, obviously I'd forget," He replied, passing it over to Remus's outstretched hand.

"This is for you Ro-Bro! I remembered what you said in the hospital and I'd heard of people doing things like this and thought you might be interested," Remus said, presenting the box to Roman.

Roman opened the box and found a large heart shaped pendant, covered by a red jewel of the same shape in the front. He blinked at it in confusion before looking up at Remus for answers.

"It's a cremation pendant. The top O-ring can be screwed off and you can put some of the ashes in it. That way no matter what you can always carry her with you everywhere. Go ahead, read the back!" Remus said excitedly.

Roman pulled it out and turned it over in his hand reading the inscription "Forever a light in the dark," and then in a fancier and larger font the name Bellissima was inscribed below it.

"You guys shouldn't have," Roman fretted, looking at the item that had surely cost them a decent bit of money to not only get but personalize.

"It was no problem, I loved the idea as soon as Remus brought it to me. Although it was difficult to come to an agreement that he could not write a tasteless and crude joke about death on the back of it," Janus replied.

"Still think we should've," Remus replied with a shrug which earned a disapproving stare from Patton and Virgil while Logan and Janus just simply shook their heads in defeat.

Roman looked down at the necklace in his hands and smiled at it, new tears forming in his eyes again.

"Thank you, it's truly beautiful."