Chapter 5- Strength And Weakness
Yukio settled himself in the waiting room, his heel tapping the floor as he stared at the slowly brightening sky outside. They had just taken Rin back for surgery, and Yukio knew he was in for a long wait, but he couldn't help the anxiety flaring inside him every time he glanced at the clock. Five hours. The surgery was five hours. He had a lot of time before anything was going to get around to happening.
But what if something happened? If Rin started reacting badly to the medications? Yukio glanced at the doors. Surely they'd say something… But that was a lie. They almost never did, moving instead to just work their hardest to fix it.
Yukio turned to stare out at the scenery there, the buildings of lower True Cross Town district were slightly hazy in the distance, but Yukio thought he could just make out the rooftop of their old school. His heel kept tapping at the hard floor, the bright lights were harsh, but the morning sun beginning to rise was burning.
Five hours rolled around agonizingly, and Yukio stood up to get a glass of water. The woman smiled at him, and he scanned the nearby wall at the items listed in the small cafe just outside the waiting room. He had skipped breakfast, not wanting to eat in front of Rin since he'd be having surgery, and had told himself he'd just eat while his brother was in surgery. Somehow the time had drifted past him, and he couldn't feel anything. He just… didn't feel hungry.
Yukio took a deep breath, and drank some water. His cram students showed up, he heard their unpatterned footsteps in the hall as they stepped off the elevator. Their voices were muted and somber, whispering as they walked in. Yukio glanced at the clock and felt his stomach drop out from under him. Rin was late!
It was already an hour past the time they had estimated that they would be finished with surgery. Yukio jerked his head toward the doors Rin had disappeared behind. What had happened? Where was he?
Shima sauntered over, his voice low and his eyes serious for once. Yukio blinked at that, wondering when that change had come over him. "Hey, teach. Is Rin out yet?"
Yukio swallowed as he glanced back at the doors anxiously. "No, he's not. I haven't heard anything either."
Shima grimaced, "Well," he looked back toward the doors Yukio was watching. "No news is sometimes good news, right?"
"Sometimes." Yukio felt anxiety crawl up his stomach and attack his spine and he sat rigidly in his chair he had claimed.
Ryuuji and the others sat down closeby. Ryuuji took his other side, sitting next to him. Yukio glanced at Ryuuji's knee so close to his, and he looked away again. His heel tapped at the tile. Ryuuji tilted at the sound, and Yukio stopped, stilling his movements. Glancing up at him, Yukio felt a small stirring of surprise to see Ryuuji focused hard on the clock, his gaze trailing toward the doors as well.
Tension sat high on Ryuuji's shoulders, and Yukio peered at him. He hadn't realized he was staring, so when Ryuuji turned his face to look at him, Yukio twitched and looked away. He hadn't realized Ryuuji had any real vested interest. It took him by surprise. It was like… Ryuuji cared. He actually cared. Ryuuji was tracing his fingers over the worn beads he was holding, his lips softly mouthing the words to the prayers inscribed on his soul.
But why?
Yukio's gaze kept drifting to the way Ryuuji's hands moved. It was hypnotic. There was a grace to the movements, and it was.. Admirable, how the Aria could focus so sharply on something and keep his movements so precise. It wasn't the first time he had witnessed it either. The entire school year Ryuuji had always been a driven and passionate student. His own scores were just below Yukio's own test scores. In most classes they were literally tied.
Yukio looked over at the window, seeing traffic build up on the freeway. The sun was shining even brighter, and the clouds that had been there that morning had drifted away sometime between morning and the early afternoon. Yukio checked his watch again. He had stared with stunned horror when Mephisto had walked in, his expression had little trace of his usual joviality and frivolous demeanor. The Preceptor had walked straight toward the desk, and bent low to whisper softly with the woman working the front desk.
Her expression cleared and became quite still as she whispered up at him, her eyes glancing back at Yukio sitting there rigidly as he watched them, his hands curling to fists on his lap. Just what was going on? Mephisto turned away after a moment with a tip of his hat and came to sit beside the other Cram students. Renzou cringed as he leaned away subtly and Mephisto pretended not to notice the other's discomfort. His eye when he glanced down at the pink-haired teen was sharp.
It had been eight hours since they had taken Rin back, with still no update. Yukio had finally cracked, pacing the nearly empty waiting room. He had just gotten off the phone with the men from the Monastery. They had expected Rin to be out of surgery and into recovery but Yukio was forced to voice that… Rin wasn't out yet. Shiemi had nodded off with her head on Konekomaru's shoulder. The rest of the class and Mephisto were still seated but Yukio could see the tension building. Ryuuji had been unintentionally gritting his teeth. The sound had grated on Yukio's frayed nerves. He had fled his seat, unable to take another second of the noise.
The sun had passed its highest part of the day and was beginning its descent towards the horizon line. It had been nine hours since Rin had been taken from him. Yukio's mind was a whirlwind, unable to settle from the maelstrom of dark thoughts. He was itching to go to the front desk and demand answers.
Mephisto was the only one who seemed to read his thoughts. With a soft pop, a warm cup of tea appeared in the air before him, the sweet scent of chamomile carried by the steam. "Drink. It should ease the nerves."
Finally, after nearly ten grueling hours the Neurosurgeon overseeing Rin's surgery stepped through the doors. Yukio's heart lurched painfully in his chest and he was vaguely aware of a tingling in his legs from his pacing. The surgeon came over to the group of teenagers and the only adult was a demon. The man looked exhausted, bags under his eyes and his hair a ruffled mess.
"That was the most difficult surgery I've ever overseen in my thirty years as a surgeon. He made it out of surgery. He was stable the entire time. Five brain tumors were successfully removed. His right kidney was also completely removed." The surgeon paused, licking his lips as he scanned the room. "There are eight more brain tumors that are too deep or in a delicate place in his brain. We couldn't get any of them out right now." He shook his head, his lips pressing together briefly before he continued. "We had to use blessed tools and even that almost wasn't enough. Even shaving his head to get into his skull was a fight; his hair kept growing back, you see? By the time we completed both operations, his kidney grew back and all his incisions closed, his skull fully fused back together."
"That is impressive." Mephisto commented, his eyebrows raised. "Strong regenerative ability."
"It really is. But it also makes things more urgent. With how fast his cells multiply the danger of the cancers spreading is very high. In fact, I'm sure it's already taking hold elsewhere in his body. The kidney he regrew doesn't have tumors on it that we can see. But we will have to be fast and tough with treatment." The surgeon warned Yukio.
Yukio nodded, his hands clenching.
"What do you suggest now?" Mephisto actually appeared to be worried.
"We will be as aggressive as his demonic cells. We hit it with everything we got. Strongest dose of chemotherapy we have. We will keep doing tests every other day to check for other cancer cells in his body. If chemo doesn't work, radiation. We keep doing surgeries to remove anything we safely can."
The doctor beckoned towards the doors.
"You are welcome to go see him. He is in his normal room. He didn't even need the recovery room."
Yukio rushed to Rin's room, eager to ease the anxiety threatening to close his lungs. He could hear the others behind him, as he found the right room and stepped inside. Rin was awake, his eyes meeting Yukio's.
"Well that sucked." Rin announced as they came in, his hospital gown was clean and pure white, his skin pale but not sickly. Rin grinned, fangs gleaming in the sunlight coming through from the open window. Rin's eyes drank them all in, his eyes stopping on… Suguro? Yukio withheld the urge to step between the two.
"How are you feeling?" Yukio asked, drawing his brother's attention once more.
"I have a headache but I'm feeling pretty good."
"You are certainly not making things easy, little brother." Mephisto seemed morbidly cheerful as he sauntered into the room.
"I can't help it. But I'm glad I don't have to deal with itchy stitches." Rin replied.
"The doctor is worried." Yukio informed Rin.
"He said I could go home for today, if Mephisto would get us a key to the emergency ward here."
"I can arrange that." Mephisto agreed.
Several hours, strict instructions, and a change of clothes later, Rin was finally able to step out of the room without a wheelchair. The first time Rin had been aware enough, he had enjoyed the experience.
Maybe Yukio would let them get one to play with?
But after the first time, he wanted to stretch his legs and walk without someone hovering. That was easier said than done as his entire freaking Cram class hovered at varying distances from him.
Yukio was the only one giving him space. Rin wasn't sure if he should be worried about that or not. Yukio was also carrying medical equipment loaned to them by the hospital.
Shiemi was on one side, Ryuuji on the other. Kuro was perched on Ryuuji's broad set shoulders, his purr audible and soothing. Konekomaru and Izumo walked behind Rin, Izumo attempting to appear distant and uncaring. Rin had seen how well she had done in Kyoto with the sick and wounded. She would make a fantastic doctor if she tried for it.
Shima was trailing furthest back. He hadn't said much to Rin since he revealed his condition. He always had a troubled, constipated look when new information about Rin's cancer came up. Rin turned his head to peer back at the pink haired boy, worried for him.
His foot bumped over the different flooring as they stepped into the twins' bedroom and Rin found himself tipping forward. Four sets of hands grabbed him, keeping him up.
"Be careful, dumbass!"
"Rin!"
"Are you ok?"
"Watch where you're going!"
"Rin!" Yukio's tone was rough and scolding.
"Sorry!" Rin hissed, batting away the numerous hands holding him up. "I was distracted."
"Be more careful." Ryuuji chastised him, his warm eyes worried. Rin scoffed, blushing and continued walking.
Finally his own bed was in sight. He longed to go lay down but he didn't want them to think he wasn't ready to be out of the hospital yet. He sat in his desk chair and turned to watch them pile into the dorm room. Ryuuji planted himself right besides Rin's chair. The others spread out to sit on Rin and Yukio's beds.
Yukio busied himself with setting up the equipment. An IV pole was set next to his bed, sterile packages of hoses and needles packed away in drawers. Yukio's personal doctor's bag filled with even more small necessities essential for caring for Rin. Rin reached up to scratch at the IV port in his chest, unhappy with the addition.
"Leave that alone, Rin!" Yukio snapped. "How many times do I have to tell you!"
" It itches!" Rin whined.
"Make sure he doesn't mess with it." Yukio told his students before taking the bags of fluids out of the room. An awkward silence fell, every eye on where Rin's hand still lingered.
"Rin…What is that?" Shiemi asked softly.
"It's a… central catheter thingy and a port. They will give me medicine through it." Rin lifted his shirt, unashamed, showing off the small bump in his upper chest.
"Uhhhhh… ya know. I got a hot date tonight. I need to get going." Renzo suddenly piped up, sidestepping towards the door. Everyone watched as he shuffled out of the room, exchanging confused glances.
"Why is he being weird?" Izumo snipped, turning her accusing glare on Ryuuji.
"I don't know! Go ask him!" Ryuuji snapped.
Rin couldn't hold back his yawn as the familiar bickering actually eased the last of the tension from him. He may be half demon but he had just gotten out of major surgeries and still wasn't feeling too well. He allowed himself to relax further, eyes closed, leaning against Ryuuji's hip. A gentle hand settled on to his shoulder and he sighed, slipping into hypnagogia.
"Looks like Rin is asleep now." Konekomaru whispered.
"I should be getting home!" Shiemi announced. She kissed Rin's forehead and with a round of farewells, she departed.
"Alright, spill." Izumo began, turning her attention to Ryuuji.
"What?"
"You know."
"What do I know?"
"I think I know what she's getting at, Bon." Konekomaru injected.
"One of you tell me, then!" Ryuuji tried to keep his voice down but it was getting harder by the minute. Ryuuji lifted Rin up, taking him over to his bed. Konekomaru pulled back the sheets and helped settle the boy into bed.
"You sure have been clingy lately." Izumo drawled, beckoning to the hand resting against Rin's forehead. Ryuuji jerked his hand away like he had been burnt.
"Haven't we all?" Ryuuji countered.
"You were all over him the day we went on the tour in Kyoto." Konekomaru added.
"Even before that. You two were flirting from the start. Pppft… that blush on his face when he first really looked at you was hilarious." Izumo laughed softly. "So just admit it."
"Admit what?"
"And HE is supposed to be one of the top students in our class?" Izumo asked Konekomaru, who shrugged with a shy grin. Izumo shook her head and glared at Ryuuji. "Just admit that you love Rin."
Ryuuj was about to deny it when a voice in the doorway stopped him.
"I would advise against getting in a relationship with my brother." Wide eyes turned to the door, Yukio stood there, eyes as cold as liquid nitrogen.
"Why not?" Ryuuji found himself asking, unintentionally confirming Izumo and Konekomaru's suspicion.
"Rin could die at any time. You shouldn't set yourself up for that extra pain." Yukio replied.
Ryuuji's throat felt tight when he gritted out, "It doesn't matter if I'm with Rin or not, if he dies, it'll hurt. It will hurt so damn bad. But who are you to make that decision for Rin? He should decide for himself."
"Maybe so. But Rin's brain is being consumed. He hasn't ever been able to comprehend things the same as you and I. He's brash, reckless, and it isn't his fault. That means it will get worse. If he agreed to a relationship with you, or someone else, he could be acting without thinking of the long term. I must do so for him." Yukio was looking at Rin's sleeping face.
"It could make Rin happy." Konekomaru attempted.
"I think I love him." Ryuuji admitted aloud.
Izumo sighed dramatically. "Oh thank God. Shiemi owes me dinner."
Yukio smiled bitterly, stepping over to Rin and stroking the black hair. His fingers pressed against Rin's pulse, finding it steady and strong. "You will regret it in the end."
Ryuuji didn't want to find himself in the "end" that Yukio foresaw. He shivered at the mental images of a funeral, ashes blowing in the wind. Konekomaru's hand squeezed his arm, dragging him from his fearfully dark thoughts.
His throat was dry as he croaked, "I want to try."
"I reluctantly give my blessing…"