Xenudah began to hyperventilate again. "Don't push me! I can't stand this any longer! This is torture for me too, dad! I can't do this by myself! I need them! I need them back!"

"I know...I know...I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry that you had to suffer all alone through this… I'm so sorry..." Yakunan murmured to his son, feeling his own heart break even more for the boy in his arms as he heard his son's choked and pained breathing. "Please calm–"

"You said you weren't going to push me! You promised! I trusted you!" Xenudah interrupted, his voice rising higher in pitch with each and every word.

"I know, I know...I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have said that. I should've known how you'd react."

"I just want them back! I just want them back…" Xenudah whimpered. "I just want my wife and baby girl… I want them home!"

The last part of Xenudah's sentence caused Yakunan's heart to tighten. Xenudah loved and adored his family very much, but that didn't mean he wasn't still affected by what happened to them. He just couldn't bear to watch Xenu suffer through this pain, knowing full well that it was just going to drive him insane. All he could do for now is comfort him and wait until he was ready to talk about what happened to his daughter and wife, and then, hopefully, he'd be able to move on. For now, all he could do was hold him close and comfort him however he could.

Xenudah's crying continued. He clutched onto his father tightly, refusing to let go of him. As he continued to grip onto him, he wailed heavier into his father's chest. "I can't do this..." he whined, gripping onto his father's robes tightly as sobs wracked his trembling body, his voice cracking as more sobs escaped him. "I can't..." he whimpered, clutching onto his father tightly, crying his heart out. "I can't..." he hiccuped, continuing to sob. "I'm so tired…so tired of all the pain..!" he whispered between sobs, clinging onto his father tightly. "I WANT THEM BAAAAAACK!" he cried out, letting himself completely loose, screaming and crying and sobbing. "HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MOVE ON IF I END UP LOSING THEM FOR REAL! I CAN'T HANDLE THIS! I CAAAAAAAAAAAANNNN'T!"

Yakunan sighed heavily, hugging his son tighter in response. He knew his child had been through a lot, but seeing his son in this state brought such a heavy load onto his chest. There was nothing he could do. Nothing at all to calm his child down. Yakunan could say nothing to reassure his child that everything was fine and would eventually turn around. That all would be okay. But all the same, it hurt... Seeing his son cry like this… Seeing his son suffering so terribly… It was almost too heartbreaking to look at, to see his entire world fall apart before his very eyes, leaving nothing but chaos and sorrow in its wake…

He couldn't fathom how much it was taking out of his son, how much it was hurting him, and how much he had to continue to bear the weight of it all without having anyone there to support him or help him through it...

Yakunan sat there in silence, holding onto his son and rocking him softly. He watched as the young man he had raised slowly went from one extreme to another. The anger quickly turned into sadness... Then into fear... And then to desperation. Eventually, he ended up in full-blown, broken sobbing. He clutched tightly onto his father as he sobbed violently, his breath coming in short, fast bursts, as his hands gripped Yakunan even tighter than he already was, his face buried in the elder's chest. The older man rubbed soothing circles upon his son's back, holding onto him tightly, not knowing what to say to him at the moment, unsure as to how to comfort him.

"Please…please make everything stop… Make all of this stop…"

Yakunan gazed sadly at his son, his heart breaking all over again as he realized exactly why his child was upset and afraid. This was worse than any pain and torture he could possibly think of, but at least the pain was something he knew how to deal with. At least the pain would soon pass, and everything would turn around. But seeing his son suffering, seeing him cry like this, seeing how desperate he was to see his family...

"Xenudah..." Yakunan muttered quietly. "I am so, so sorry. I don't know what to say... I don't even know what to do…" he said. "If you only knew how badly I wish I could fix this..." Yakunan sighed heavily. He wished he could give his son some kind of reassurance, some sort of assurance that everything would get better... That his pain would end.

Yakunan didn't know what else to say. How could he tell his son that his pain would end? Would it make it any better? He didn't know… But what was he supposed to do when he saw how miserable and weak and helpless his son was feeling? When he saw how utterly devastated he was by everything happening to him? When he saw that he was unable to comfort his poor, broken son who needed him the most?

What should he do?

"Please make it stop..."

"Oh, Xenudah..."

"Please…"

"I wish I could take your pain away... I wish I could make everything go back to the way it was… If only I could."

Xenudah shook his head. "It won't work."

Yakunan bit his lip. "Maybe not. Maybe... Not now. I wish I could, truly I wish I could..."

"Don't you dare leave me too… Don't you dare…" Xenudah pleaded, clenching even tighter into his father's robes as sobs and tears continued to rack his body uncontrollably. "Please… Don't leave me like everyone else did! Please! You're supposed to be here… I need you here! I can't do this alone! Not anymore!" Tears streamed from his tear stained cheeks down his face as he spoke, shaking his head violently in denial. "Don't leave me… don't leave me..." he begged. "Please..." he cried, clinging desperately to his father. "Please don't leave me!"

Yakunan was quiet, lost for words. He felt as though all of these thoughts and feelings were going through his mind at once. None of this made sense. They never made sense to him. None of it. He could not begin to understand what had gotten to him. Why his son was crying so hard, so loudly, so desperately. Everything seemed so hopeless to him. How would he ever be able to make anything go back to the way it used to be? What could he even hope to accomplish? What was he supposed to do? To even try to make any kind of a difference? How was he supposed to help his son right now? He hated himself for being unable to figure out something he never thought possible. He cursed himself internally for always being unable to put things right. Never being good enough for anyone. Why couldn't life just leave him alone for a few days? Just a few days. Surely, that was more than he deserved right now. He was just lucky that his son hadn't pushed him away yet.

He never wanted to lose his son again. He wanted to protect his son, and he couldn't. No matter how many times he tried, he simply couldn't. He couldn't bring himself to harm his son's happiness and peace like he'd threatened to before. He wouldn't dare do that. Not again. He couldn't do that to his son. He'd never forgive himself if he harmed his son in any way, shape, or form… Because he loved him, he truly did, more than he'd ever loved anyone before. More than he'd ever loved anyone in his entire life. More than anything. So, no, he would not ever, ever hurt his son. Never. Even if it killed him… He would never hurt Xenudah. Never again.

"I remember, so long ago...you used to be so happy…and I loved watching you smile..." he whispered tenderly, placing a hand on top of Xenudah's head, ruffling his hair. "Even when your life was falling apart… You never gave up. You always kept smiling. Even when it was the worst time for anyone…" He paused for a brief moment. "Even when it was just plain awful. Because you weren't giving up, no matter what." He chuckled faintly, staring down at his son. "Your spirit was so strong. It always kept shining. Even if the circumstances were absolutely dreadful… You always found the strength to keep smiling. It was always something about you that kept me smiling even in those dark times. You reminded me every day of that. Every little thing you did was adorable." He chuckled warmly, pulling his son closer and holding his son tight, pressing a kiss atop his son's forehead softly. "You're my world. You always have been… You forever will be… I love you, Xenudah..."

He held his son close, resting his forehead against his son's soft hair. "I love you so much…" He sniffed softly. "But… It is so hard sometimes…" he murmured. "To let people in and care for them… Especially when you have been hurting so much… All this time…" he trailed off quietly, sighing softly and closing his eyes. "...I'm so sorry, son…"

He pulled his son even closer and rested his head on his shoulder, burying his nose into his son's hair affectionately. His son curled in closer to him and sobbed harder, gripping onto Yakunan even tighter.

"...I want to be able to protect you… Like I've always done… Like I always will. To protect you, to protect our family... I cannot stand watching you suffer like this…. Please, I beg of you… Let me help you. Help yourself…" Yakunan murmured softly, kissing his son's hair again. "I am so, so sorry that this has happened to you, Xenudah... Please believe me when I say that… Whatever this is between us, whatever it may mean to you… Let me handle it for you. I may not have been there for you then, but I'm here for you now… I'm not going anywhere…"

"What's become of us…?" Xenudah shook his head slightly, tightening his grip around Yakunan's middle, still sobbing. "This isn't fair… Why does all of this happen to me…? I'm trying to do something good… To help my family… And this happens… Why does it hurt so much?" he whimpered, squeezing tighter, trembling against his father, refusing to look him in the eye. "Why do I feel so horrible…?" Xenu cried. "Why am I so scared…?" His eyes grew wide. "W-Why do I feel like crying so much…" he whimpered softly, shivering, clutching onto his father tightly. "And why does it feel as if… The world is crumbling down around us…?" Xenudah sniffled quietly. "I don't want to die… I don't want to… I don't want to be alone…"

"Xenu… Look at me..." Yakunan whispered. "As long as I'm around and here, you'll never have to be alone…"

"It hurts… I'm so scared…" Xenudah trembled as he spoke, his voice barely a breath.

"I know...I know it hurts…"

"Can you promise me something…?" Xenudah asked softly, looking up at his father, blinking a few times. "Promise me that you won't leave me, father… Promise… That you won't leave…" he sobbed. "I… I'm scared…" he whimpered softly, burying his face into his father's collarbone, clinging tightly onto his father's kimono, shaking terribly with fear. "I can't bear it…"

"Shhhh, dear… Calm down… It's alright…" Yakunan murmured, wrapping his arms around his son tenderly and holding him tightly against himself. "I'm here…" he whispered soothingly. "You're safe…"

"FATHER, I– NO! I'M NOT OKAYYYYY!" Xenudah wailed. His entire body trembled as tears rolled down his cheeks freely.

"Oh, Xenu… Come here… I've got you…"

"I don't wanna be alone… Can't we stay together..? I don't wanna be lonely… I don't wanna be sad anymore… Please… Father, please…"

"Xenu Akurai… It's okay…" Yakunan cooed, stroking his son's hair carefully, feeling tears streaming down his own cheek and dripping slowly off the side of his face down to his chin. "We're okay now… You're safe now…"

Xenudah continued to cry and sob, burying his face deeper into his father's chest, trembling in desperation and fear, as he gripped tightly onto his father. He didn't understand. It wasn't fair… This had to stop. This couldn't be real. There was nothing he could do. He didn't know what to do. He didn't know what to think. All he could do was cry.

"Xenudah… My dear Xenudah… How long have you felt this vulnerable and lost?"

Xenudah began to shake even harder. He had been thinking about this for weeks now. Months really. He had been thinking about this nonstop. He had just never told anyone about it. But today. Today had finally come. He couldn't take it anymore. He needed someone to talk to, and he was willing to risk everything to find someone. Someone who understood. Someone that would listen to him. Someone that would understand all this hurt, all this pain he went through. Someone who he loved dearly. Someone who he knew he could rely on completely, and trust wholeheartedly. Someone like his father. Anyone like his father.

"Father… Please…" Xenudah mumbled shakily, sobbing loudly as he clung desperately to his father, trembling fiercely, shaking and crying hysterically. "Please… I need help… Please help me… I want to feel better… I just want to feel like I can be free…" His voice broke and cracked painfully, choking softly in grief and despair as his voice cracked, sounding so frail as the words spilled from his mouth, filled with anguish and pain, trembling with sorrow and misery. "How much longer can I go on like this…? How much more… Father, if you leave… I'll die too…!" he sobbed weakly. "Please, Father… Make it stop… JUST MAKE IT STOOOOOOOOOOP!" Xenudah shrieked.

Yakunan tightened his grip around Xenudah, nuzzling against his neck gently, letting his fingers run slowly through his son's hair. As he hugged his boy tightly, he let loose a gentle shuddering breath, feeling his heart break a bit for his son, hearing his cries. Seeing his son in so much distress was shattering his heart all over again. He just wanted to make it stop. Make it all go away and make things better, but there was simply nowhere for him to turn to… Everything was wrong. Everything felt completely wrong.

"I just don't want to leave you, Xenudah… Never… I'd rather live forever than see you suffering like this… I'm here… Always…" Yakunan uttered softly, brushing his hand lightly over his son's arm. "I can't protect you if I'm gone… And I don't want to be apart from you either… I can't do it… Not again… I'm not going to do anything to hurt you… I'll stay here and keep watch over you… I can't lose you again… So let me be with you while you're awake, alright..? No matter how tired or weak you are… We will manage. I won't leave you again… Don't make me…" He lowered his head, closing his eyes briefly and taking in a deep breath. "Not again…"

"Father, listen… I don't know how much more of this I can possibly take… I don't know if I can go through another day of this… I don't know if I can deal with any of this… Just please… I can't stand being alone anymore… I hate being alone… It makes me so miserable…"

"I know... I know…" Yakunan sighed softly. "But you are never alone," he stated. "I love you very much. You are never alone in this. Never…"

"I remember falling asleep next to you when I was scared as a young boy…" Xenudah whispered fondly. "I remember… I remember falling asleep next to you after a dream. I always remember that moment. It's so precious to me… When I used to fall asleep in your lap like that, you'd brush my hair gently and tell me stories. And you'd hold me close. Then we would go to sleep like that. And I would wake up every morning like that… And then one day, I was left alone, and I didn't want to be. It felt… Horrible… I was so afraid… That I wouldn't ever see you again… That I might never see you ever again. Sometimes, I still can't believe you came back for me. After so many years, I still can't fathom that you're back… Even if it took all this time… You're still here… I missed you so much… I don't want to ever leave your side again. I just don't want to be alone…"

Yakunan sighed softly, rubbing his son's back lightly. "No one will ever, ever take you away from me again, Xenu. Never again. Ever."

"I miss you…"

Yakunan wrapped his arm protectively around his son, squeezing him closely and tightly, pressing a kiss to the top of his head as a tear slid down his face.

"I've missed you too … I love you so much. I'm sorry I made you worry… I'm sorry I hurt you. I shouldn't have done that…" He swallowed thickly. "Never again. I swear it. I'll try so hard to always make sure no one else hurts you again… I promise. No more…"