DISCLAIMER: I do not own Harry Potter, or any of the content referenced/quoted. Warning for swearing.
...
The Letter
The summer days of 1978 stretch out long before Em. Even between setting up and opening the shop while Danders is away visiting his daughter, she finds the days blending one into another. She knows she should be enjoying it, but it feels different.
Gone is the summer haze that found her and her sister exploring the lochs near her home and the evenings spent running wild with Sirius, the salt air heavy in her lungs. Now there is only the thick heavy haar, tense people, and there is only her and Remus.
Not that she has ever had an issue with it being just her and Remus. But something is different between them too.
She finishes up her fifth year of high school with straight A's and tells her teachers she is planning on taking a year out to earn some money before moving onto university. It is not quite a lie, she is earning money and she is planning on going to university; it's just that she feels that the complete truth, that there is a dark wizard running amok killing muggles and her sister's status as a muggle-born puts her entire family risk, will not go over well with her very muggle teachers.
Still. There will be plenty of time for university later when they get through this. If they get through this.
Her decision to skip uni comes as no surprise to anyone, not even the gaggle of girls who let her share lunches with them during break. They talk of plans to travel, to study and to fall in love. Em can not say that she's not even sure if she'll live long enough to see next week, let alone travel to another country.
The shop is safe enough for now, Hogsmeade escaping the brunt of Voldemort's attacks, most likely due to the proximity of one Albus Dumbledore. Though a few magical folk have passed through by the time summer starts to come to a close. She finds her days and evenings full of stock checks, new customers and bargaining with the old whistling coffee machine when she's sure no one is listening. But judging by the smirk on Remus' face, she reckons he hears more than he lets on.
Remus seems to be enjoying his work too. She knows his condition makes it difficult for him in the wizarding world, not that he's ever properly taken the time to explain it to her. After they reconciled, she had hoped he would tell her more but every time she tried to bring it up he grew quiet and awkward and would quickly change the subject.
Danders continues to write on and off as her mother's visits to Hogsmeade grow fewer and farther between. Cass travels up to see Isobel often and Em has made the journey once or twice. She can't exactly blame her mother for secluding herself in the Scottish Highlands. The days are growing darker, and the news headlines with it.
There is still a life to be lived, however.
Which brings Em to one grey dawn, musing over a letter from Sirius as she sips her morning tea. She holds the paper tightly in her hands, her eyes staring blankly at the words. There's something about it that makes her stomach twist uncomfortably and she has to stop her hands from trembling.
Scratchers, now an old cantankerous kneazle, snores gently from his perch on the counter.
The shop bell rings, announcing Remus' entrance. She looks up as he shuffles over, his face weary.
"Long night?" She asks, her spare hand reaching to pet Scratchers. The kneazle purrs happily.
"You could say that," he murmurs, a half smile on his face. She knows it is close to the full moon, that these nights are the most difficult for him, but she can't bring herself to remark upon it. The words get lodged in her throat.
He shrugs out of his jacket, lays it across the counter. His eyes skim across the list of fresh stock that sits to her left.
"More Anne of Green Gables?" He asks.
"It's my book of the month," she says, focusing on the letter in her hand. Remus moves behind her to peer over her shoulder.
"Pads contact you about tonight?"
She moves the letter from his eyeline and raises an eyebrow, "Nosy much?"
He smirks, holding up his hands as he backs off towards the storeroom.
"Kettle's already on!" She shouts after him.
"Thank you!"
Em sighs and shakes her head. Those boys, she thinks, absolute menaces.
She places the letter down on the counter, her gaze moving towards the wide window at the shop front. Dawn bleeds into grey sunlight, and it looks as if it might rain. A few folk march past, sparing a brief glance at the warm light spilling from the shop before walking on. Dark clouds are looming overhead and a heavy fog surrounds the tallest buildings. Scratchers rolls onto his stomach with a mighty yawn, and then drops down from the counter and plods off sleepily.
Sirius and James are acting more strange than usual. They'd met a few times since graduating, once to help Cass and Em move into the tiny flat that Danders owned above the shop. It was a cosy wee place, with two small bedrooms and a front room just wide enough to hold the boys, Lily, Marlie and them. They'd spent their first night getting drunk between the cardboard boxes, telling tales from Hogwarts, sharing plans for the future. It had felt like their whole lives were stretched out before them, that they would be in that tiny flat celebrating forever.
Then the morning came and Sirius was nowhere to be seen.
Em had thought that when she moved to Hogsmeade she would see them more often. That she would be less excluded than when they had boarded the train and travelled off on their adventures to Hogwarts. She feels a little stupid for thinking that now; whenever she turns a corner conversations stop, things are whispered out of her hearing range and she swore she saw James passing a note on the sly to Remus just the other day.
They are keeping things from her. She doesn't like it.
And now this letter. An address, a time, and nought much else. The dark feeling lingers in her stomach, the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention.
"Remus?"
The boy pokes his head out, a mug of tea steaming in his hand.
"This meeting," she starts, "Does it have anything to do with why you all have been acting so strangely recently?"
Remus opens his mouth to reply and then pauses. His mouth hangs open in a little 'o' shape, gaping like a little fish. She raises an eyebrow at him and he has the decency to look a little sheepish.
"You noticed that?" He asks.
She rolls her eyes, "I'm not stupid."
"We never thought you were stupid!" He scrambles for words, taking a step into the room, "It's not like that at all, it's just-"
"-that I'm a muggle."
"No!"
"No? I rather think that by this point in my life I'd know if I was a muggle or not, wouldn't you say?"
"I, uh," Remus shuffles awkwardly, "maybe?"
Em sighs. She moves forward, takes his tea and sets it down on the wooden counter. She takes his hands, clasping them gently.
"Remus, if this is someway of trying to protect me, I've got to say-"
"It's not!"
She stares him down until he sighs.
"It is, maybe just a little."
"Remus," she reaches up, her hand cradling the side of his face. "We've talked about this. I'm going to be in danger no matter what happens. I'm aware of that. But I can't let it stop me from living my life, nor can I let you continue to exclude me in an attempt to try and protect me. It's not fair."
He deflates at her words, "Cass said you would say something like that."
"Cass and I have talked about this at great length already."
A frustrated hand combs through his hair and he settles a steely gaze on her.
"Can you blame us for wanting to try and protect you?" He asks. "You're already putting yourself at risk working with m-"
"Remus Lupin, if you finish that sentence I will slap you."
"You don't understand, Em."
"I would understand better if you spoke to me about it."
He shakes his head, "I can't."
The green thing in her chest shrivels a little at his words. She tries to bury the feeling down in the pit of her stomach, but it stings.
"I can't do this, Em," he says.
"Just please talk to me."
He shakes his head again and takes a half-step back.
"I have to go."
"You just got here-"
"I have to go." He turns and flees the shop. The door slams shut behind him. She watches as steam continues to roll off his still warm tea and sighs.
It starts to rain.