It had been many years since Hanzo had fallen in love with a woman. For a time, he thought it might never happen again; he preferred men and the women he admired were so few and far between, but he didn't mind. He still remembered the last woman he had loved, which, coincidentally, had also been his first. She had been a girl from the city who had been hired by his family to periodically come in and teach some of the younger children. She was bright, and uncannily sharp. The children had loved her. They had been fond of each other, she was more sweet on him than he had caught onto in the beginning, but as time had moved on, they'd found themselves closer with every passing day. They'd been young, Hanzo just entering his twenties, and she somewhere around that age, he couldn't quite remember, and they had been foolish. To this day, he didn't know if it was an actual ransom abduction, or if his family had staged it to get her out of the way, but she was there one day and gone the next, with nothing but a letter, demanding more money than the family thought she was worth, left of her. Hanzo never saw her again.
In some ways, Briallen had reminded him of her; that cheeky grin, the way she wasn't afraid to needle him, those sharp eyes that seemed to miss nothing, the way she cared so much about everyone else but herself. She had been a surprise, for sure, someone he thought was just a silly girl, a fling Jesse needed to get out of his system. In the beginning, he wouldn't have minded if it turned out that way, if Jesse had just done what he needed to and gotten over her. But now, he realised that wouldn't have been how it turned out at all. Jesse could see how unordinary she was, he recognised what she had hidden beneath the surface, and he would not have let her go if he had the chance. It had taken Hanzo twice as long to realise it, to really get a good look at the woman she actually was instead of seeing the girl he had presumed her to be. And how glad he was that he had seen her.
How glad he was to have her home.
That month, the wait to just see if she came out of that okay, filled him with agonising dread. It was all too reminiscent of how Taira had disappeared, brought up too many old memories that he thought he'd squashed down. Every day he tried to remind himself of what Jesse told him; "If it's Reyes who has her, she'll be okay." Every day he tried to believe in those words, after all, Jesse wouldn't lie to him, not about something like that. It was strange, they'd only known each other for a few short months, but he already felt like she fit perfectly. He wouldn't admit it, not even to Jesse. He wouldn't admit how nervous he'd been that day in Norfolk, how worried he'd been that she'd pull away, disgusted. He would never admit that she made him feel like he was floating anytime she tossed that bright smile his way, would never admit how many nights he stayed up, just watching her fall asleep, tucked up against his side. He would never admit how much the prospect of all that being ripped away from him so quickly had made him ache.
But she was home. She was safe, and she was home. Yes, she had some baggage, yes, she had some issues, but they were no fault of her own. He would help her through it as best he could, as would Jesse, because that's what partners were supposed to do. He knew how much it hurt to have memories like that, memories of acts you wish you could take back, of moments where you wish you would have taken another path. Her past was rife with them. And, maybe, a part of him hoped that by helping her through her maze, she could help him out of his.
But for now, he was content to just lay there with her, holding her close while she traced the lines of his tattoo, her touch light. She was wearing one of Jesse's shirts, which was absolutely enormous on her, having thrown it on while he changed the sheets. She had asked for a couple of his shirts, saying something about how the scent comforted her. It wasn't unusual, Hanzo definitely did prefer his boyfriend's hoodies over his own, but she seemed to have a thing about scents. She knew he had one of Jesse's flannels the moment he walked in, he saw the way her eyes lit up, though she tried to hide it, and she always knew when he'd been around Jesse that day, asking how he was and what they did together. Interestingly, she could tell the difference between when he had actually been with Jesse that day, and when he had just worn one of Jesse's hoodies during the day. It was quite amusing to see her pause for a split second every time he opened the door, as if she was gathering that data, before her smile widened and she greeted him.
She let out a soft huff, her lips bunched up in a little pout as she paused, her fingers re-tracing over one of the clouds. He could see the question in her eyes, watched as she worked it around in her head a little, then said nothing.
Chuckling, he brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, catching her attention. "What is on your mind, Hachi? You have been chewing on something for a while now."
Her eyes widened and a blush caught her cheeks. "Wh-What? Oh, nothing, just uh…" she turned her head away, muttering something under her breath.
He raised an eyebrow. "I think you're going to need to repeat that for me."
"Jesse mentioned something about…" she paused, looking a little pained as she glanced up at him.
"About what?"
"Dragons?" she said, giving him a weak smile before she continued on very quickly. "I-I-I don't mean to pry, especially because I wouldn't even know how to ask, is it rude to ask about them? I wouldn't know, I don't know the first thing about dragons, or dragon culture. Is there such a thing as dragon culture? Culture for dragons? Culture about dragons, I-"
He laughed softly, shaking his head. "Breathe, Hachi, breathe." He cupped her cheeks, pressing a kiss to her forehead as he sat up. "If I am honest, I was waiting to see how long it was going to take you to ask. You lasted longer than Jesse did when he first found out."
Her face turned a light pink as she pushed herself up, instinctively reaching out to play with his fingers. She did that quite often, not even just to his hands. Jesse was touchy, but she took it to a slightly different level. It seemed at any moment, if she could, she preferred to touch or be touched, especially if they were talking. It was almost as if she needed something to ground her, or a reminder he was there. He never mentioned anything about it, especially since he'd caught her a few times realising what she was doing and quickly yanking herself away. From the look on her face, it was clear she'd been chastised about it by less than friendly figures. He understood it, though, it was a way of showing love, of feeling loved.
He smiled, gently taking her fingers and holding them in his hand. "So you want to see the dragons, hmm?"
She shrugged a bit, giving him a sheepish grin as she tried to hide behind her bangs. "Kinda? I mean, if it's no trouble. It's not every day that you learn your boyfriend has cool soul dragon things…"
"Is that how Jesse described them?" he asked, amused. It wasn't far from the truth, but he thought Jesse knew them better than that.
"Maybe, or maybe Jesse mentioned something about dragons and I did some research after pulling up your personnel file. Don't forget I work in the archives with Winston," she said, an oddly satisfied smirk on her face. He definitely didn't put it past her to put so much work into finding out something she could have just asked him about.
"How can I forget that when you gripe at me about him nearly everyday," Hanzo teased, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. "Close your eyes, Hachi."
She puffed up her cheeks a bit, frowning. "I do not-"
"Close. Your. Eyes," he repeated, mocking a playful growl as he leaned closer.
Scrunching up her nose, she gave him a little look before listening, drawing her knees up as she did so.
Almost as soon as her eyes closed, his tattoo lit up, and the dragons slid out of his skin, materialising onto the bed, already eager to meet her. They had been for a while, as excited as they'd been when he first met Jesse. They had a way of leeching off his emotions, which was, in of itself, both a blessing and a curse. It meant they were quick to act when he needed them, but it also made them very nosy.
As soon as his little claws hit the blanket, Raijin scurried up her legs, pausing on her knees to look up into her face. He looked smaller than usual, no bigger than a small mink, probably so as not to scare her, and it seemed Fujin had taken the hint as well. Small meant less intimidating, and they didn't want to intimidate her.
She had jumped when she felt the little dragon climbing up her leg, opening her eyes to find him nearly nose to nose with her. Her eyes lit up, though she seemed hesitant to move, clutching at one of his hands. "Ó mo dhéithe," she whispered, smiling. "You are so very tiny." She paused, her nose twitching. "So you're where his cherry blossom scent comes from, are you?" She reached up with a hesitant hand, glancing quickly at Hanzo for his input.
He chuckled and nodded, watching as Raijin snuffled at her fingers, his gaze locked on her face, before he stretched his head up for a scratch, flicking his tail. "They can be simple beasts, when they wish to be," he said, reaching down to give Fujin a reassuring scritch. "Normally, they are quite a bit bigger than this, but they are trying to impress you."
Her smile brightened at that and she slowly let go of his hand, pulling the dragon off her knees to cradle him in her lap. Raijin melted into it, letting out a satisfied purr-like rumble which spurred his sister into movement, slinking up onto her shoulders to sniff at Briallen's scars. "They're so much warmer than I thought they would be," she murmured, running her fingers over Raijin's scales, and giggling when his sister licked her cheek before butting her head against it.
"Again, they are trying to impress you," he chuckled, scooting closer so he could sit beside her, his hand on the back of her neck. "They are usually more dignified than this."
"They feed off your energy, though, don't they? So, really, they're this way because you're comfortable around me," she said, looking up at him with that bright smile.
He was impressed. She'd said she'd done research, but she'd have to have done quite a bit more research than necessary to learn that piece of information. "That is true, I suppose. The one in your lap is Raijin, and his sister, Fujin, is the one currently trying to bite me because she is jealous and wants all your attention."
She giggled, gently scooping the offending dragon up by the belly and holding her out in front of her, giving her a mock frown. "That's not very nice, Fujin," she said, and the little dragon stopped squirming in her grip, locking eyes. "He's kind enough to house you in his spirit and you repay that kindness with violence? For shame!"
Fujin was anything but repentant, her gaze blank before she started wriggling again, making little chuffing sounds.
Briallen shook her head and set the dragon down in her lap next to her brother. It was amazing to see how quickly she was able to handle them, it had taken Jesse a few days to get them to actively listen to him, and Hanzo a few years to garner their trust. But here she was, with both of them already curling up in her lap, not even bickering with each other about having to share the small space.
"You are truly a miracle, Hachi," he chuckled, pressing a kiss to her temple.
"What, you mean they're normally not this well behaved?" she teased, smiling up at him, her eyes soft, before she looked back down at the dragons beginning to snooze in her lap. "It's probably the pheromones, if I'm being honest. I'm supposed to have a hive of some kind, they respond to my scent and see me as their queen, but… I don't know what happened to them… So I kind of just naturally put out the scent, hoping that one day… I've been told it's rather calming to other creatures." He saw the way her gaze unfocused, how her smile drooped just a bit as she went quiet.
"Is this another episode?" He rubbed the back of her neck, slowly bringing her back to him.
"Hmm? No, no I'm just… remembering things I shouldn't." She shook her head, leaning into his chest and closing her eyes. "Thank you, Han, for trusting me with this. It means a lot."
"Of course. I am relieved it went over so well. I recall a lot more scratching and rebelliousness when they first met Jesse," he said with a fond chuckle. Boisterous as they were, they were his dragons, and he'd always be fond of them no matter what. "Now, we should probably get some sleep, Hachi. You have an exciting day planned for tomorrow."
She opened her eyes, frowning. "About that, nobody will tell me what's going on. What's planned for tomorrow that I don't know about? I mean, I get it's New Years, but, seriously."
Hanzo simply smiled and shook his head, gently tapping her nose. "It's a surprise, Hachi. But I feel you will be more than pleased with the outcome."
When you woke the next morning, there was a significant lack of an archer beside you. However, as if to make up for it, there were copious amounts of dragon. Bigger now than a mastiff, they were twined together, their deep blue scales glistening in the light that came from your window. One of them, you couldn't tell which, had its paws wrapped around your leg, head resting on your thigh. They took up the entire bed together, and you couldn't help but chuckle at how cute it was.
The dragon on your leg whined when you shifted, opening its eyes to look up at you imploringly.
"I'm sorry to wake you, but I need to get up," you murmured, reaching down to gently grasp the sides of its face. At this size, you could better admire the intricate scales and the mane of golden fur running down their back. Their horns were larger than you expected them to be and would certainly have been menacing looking if they weren't giving you the most precious look ever.
The dragon whined again, almost looking as if it was pouting, and you smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of its head. "I know, waking up is always hard, isn't it? But you know what, the best things always happen when we wake up, because that's where all of our friends are." You scratched under its chin, chuckling at the low rumble that it let out as it closed its eyes. "I bet, if we get up now, we can go get breakfast and Han will be there waiting for us."
The dragon snorted, opening its eyes to give you a dissatisfied look, and you immediately knew which one this was.
"Raijin, come on, now, he's not that bad. Yeah, he's kinda grumpy and sometimes he's a meanie pants, but he's actually really sweet. I bet he gets that from you, doesn't he? Oh, I bet he does," you cooed, running your fingers through his mane as he rumbled happily and pressed his forehead against your chest. "I bet he's learnt all sorts of things from you two. You keep him out of trouble don't you, yes you do!" You smiled, groaning in laughter as he pushed you over, laying down over your chest with a satisfied chuff. "Oh, so that's how it's gonna be, huh?' You scrunched up your nose as he nuzzled your cheek. "Yeah, yeah, I love you too, buddy. Thank you for taking care of him," you murmured, kissing his forehead.
Raijin snorted again, laying his head down on your stomach and looking up at you with adorable yellow eyes. It was clear you were not moving for a while. You gave in, chuckling when Fujin turned her head and begged for attention as well, rubbing her snout against the palm of your hand. You laid there for a while, just enjoying the weight of them pressed up against you, and would have fallen asleep were it not for the wave of bourbon and cigars that rolled through your room.
In an instant, you were sitting up, easily pushing the dragons off of you, and hurrying into the living room. Jesse shouldn't be here, he wasn't supposed to, not with you still under the influence of Aderyn, so why could you smell him?
But Jesse was nowhere to be seen. Only Hanzo stood in the living room, holding a dress bag and a mask in his hands. His eyes widened as you came barreling out of the bedroom, still wearing nothing but Jesse's flannel, before he softened, shaking his head. "I should have known better," he said, laying the dress bag over the back of the couch and setting the mask on top of it. "I told Jesse you would know he was here, even if he was quiet."
"What was he doing here?" you asked, frowning. You could feel the stirrings of that familiar anger beginning to burn in your chest, and you did your best to squash it down. "He's not supposed to be here, he could have gotten himself hurt, I could have hurt him! I-"
"Hachi, calm down," Hanzo said, shaking his head as he reached out to gently grasp your elbows. "I had the dragons keeping you busy, we were careful."
"Careful my ass!" You yanked your arms away, feeling that anger rise. "Hanzo, I can lift a grown man by the neck with ease, what makes you think a couple of dragons laying on my chest is going to keep me down? Jesse shouldn't have been in this wing, let alone in this fucking room! What if I had scented him earlier? What would you have done? If you had gotten in the way, I would have hurt both of you!"
"You are shouting," he warned, holding his hands out in a peaceful manner, his eyes narrowed a bit. "Hachi, are you slipping into another episode?"
"Yeah, I'm shouting! I'm shouting because I'm pissed, Han! You unnecessarily put both you and Jesse in danger. Just for what? A dress and a silly mask? I thought you had more common sense than that! Do you have any idea what that would have done to me? If I had lost control and hurt or, gods forbid, killed either of you?" Your throat hurt already, but you couldn't back down. The whispers had started, fueling your anger and frustration, spurring you on, until they got to be too much. You smashed your hands over your ears, squeezing your eyes shut as you willed them to just shut up. The whispers hurt your head, somehow screaming into your mind while they still remained whispers.
You could practically feel your pulse in your temples as you fell to your knees, trying so hard to fight against the rage that bubbled up. This wasn't you, this wasn't you, this was her. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up!" You beat your hands against your ears, trying to block out the noise, and found, after the first two times, there was a soft snout on either side, keeping you from hurting yourself. You tried hard to push the dragons away, but they were insistent, gripping your hands with their tiny ones and lowering them into your lap.
Hanzo was crouched in front of you, not touching, but close enough that you could feel him without opening your eyes. "Deep breaths, Hachi. Remember what we worked on. Focus on the sound of your breathing, just like that. Just meditate on it for a little while."
You breathed, hard. Every breath felt like a struggle to get out, but each breath afterward came a little easier. It took too long until you came back down, until you couldn't hear the whispers anymore, until the guilt set in. "Time?" you asked, voice hoarse.
"Five minutes." His hands found yours, gently coaxing them out of your lap so he could hold them tightly. "Are we back?"
You took in a shaky breath, opening your eyes to look up at him. You had to blink a few times to dispel some of the blurriness left over. Nodding, you gave his hands a gentle squeeze. "Grounded. Still sore. Sorry about smacking your spirit beasts."
He smiled a bit, shaking his head. "They would not have put themselves there if they could not handle it and did not want to help you, Hachi."
As if to prove his point, Fujin crawled up your back, wrapping her long body around your neck and crowing softly into your ear. Raijin made himself comfortable in your lap, placing his little bitty dragon claws over top of your joined hands.
You chuckled, sniffling a bit. You hadn't cried this time, but you certainly wanted to. Despite having just woken up, you found yourself tired again, drained from the toll of the episode. "They're getting longer, Han. I don't know if I can wait to see Dr. Penn. I don't want to accidentally hurt you or anyone if it gets worse. I won't be able to forgive myself if I do."
He sighed softly, leaning forward to rest his forehead against yours. "I will talk with Angela. I cannot guarantee she will allow you to see Doctor Penn, however. You know the stakes." His thumbs brushed against the backs of your hands, sweeping Raijin's paws out of the way. The dragon gave an insulted squeak before he pretty much slapped his paws back in place.
You nodded a bit, closing your eyes again. "I know."
"You should take a nap, Hachi. I will make some food for when you wake up, and then we can talk about what we have planned for today, okay?" He squeezed your hands, waiting until you gave him an "Okay" before he pulled them away, quickly swooping in to cup your cheek and give you a kiss. "I love you, Hachi. I will still be here when you wake up."
Your cheeks adopted a light blush and you smiled up at him. That was a first for the two of you. You and Jesse had said it plenty of times, but with Hanzo? It was more of a show than tell. At first, you didn't know if you could classify it as love, but now you were sure you could. It wasn't quite the same as with Jesse, but there were similar undertones. You loved him, just as much as you loved Jesse, just in a slightly different way.
"I love you too," you whispered, reaching up to wrap your fingers around his wrist, leaning into the touch.
Raijin looked between you and Hanzo, eyeing your hands, before he scurried up your shoulder and mimicked the gesture with his sister. Fujin just looked at him passively, her head cocked in confusion.